Jessie Walker > Quotes

“I might love you harder when you’re at your worst, but that’s only because you need it harder then. But my love for you when you’re at your best?” I release a breath, smiling. “It’s unmatched. It consumes me.”
― Jessie Walker, Still Beating

“You’re a ticking time bomb,” I hear myself say, my voice distant even to my own ears. “One that just keeps fucking rebuilding itself after every explosion, over and over and over again. But I don’t. I don’t rebuild. I don’t heal. I just keep taking it. But I can’t anymore. There’s not enough left of me to take any more shrapnel and walk out alive.”
― Jessie Walker, If There's a Way

“There’s only so much time a person’s allowed to grieve before it becomes an inconvenience, I’ve come to learn. Before the clock speeds up, and the world goes on spinning without you, you either pull yourself out in time to catch up, or you get left behind.”
― Jessie Walker, Where There's a Will

“I was taught craving another man was a sin, but I see now how wrong they were. It’s not the fact it’s a man I desire so desperately, it’s the intensity with which I claw and grab and reach for him that has them clutching their bibles. I’d kick down the door to Hell itself to be with this man… And that terrifies them. It terrifies them that love could be so raw, so primal, so powerful—stronger than any prayer.”
― Jessie Walker, Exiled

“It’s insane. Loving him this easily… Like every piece of me was made for every piece of him.”
― Jessie Walker, Still Beating

“This Jeremy—my Jeremy—the only Jeremy that matters, doesn’t see me though. He’s miles away, gaze far off.”
― Jessie Walker, Every Breath After: Part 1

“it’s a song only he can hear. One that calls to that bottomless beast inside him, begging for everything to just stop. Please, just one more, one more hit to make it all go away—”
― Jessie Walker, Where There's a Will

“It’s a searing kiss, the kind that stokes the
flames, building and building until I know we’ll eventually, inevitably, combust from the pressure. All I can do is hope that once it settles, enough embers will have reached
those dark, cold, deserted places where loneliness lives and fear thrives.”
― Jessie Walker, Still Beating

“Because making Mason Wyatt happy has and will always be the fix I can’t resist, even if it’s at the cost of my own wellbeing.”
― Jessie Walker, All We Are

“And yet, for some reason, the particular brand of torture that comes with being near Jeremy Montgomery, is one I welcome willingly. Seeking it out. Craving it like it’s just another flask, filled to the brim with liquid fire I can asphyxiate on. Blaze my insides. Burn it all into ash. It’s fucked up on so many levels.”
― Jessie Walker, Every Breath After: Part 1

“Hunger like nothing I’ve ever felt before consumes me, and it’s a damn crime it took this long to get here. To this moment, where he is me and I am him, and I will destroy anything or anybody who tries to sever us.
Unhealthy, my ass. This love is just straight up primal. Our need for each other ingrained in us as deeply as our need for air. Inescapable.”
― Jessie Walker, Still Beating

“I look up just as a gorgeously restored ’67 black Impala pulls into the lot, stopping right before me.”
― Jessie Walker, If There's a Way

“There’re a lot of meanings behind this symbol, but that’s the one I chose for myself. Where there’s a will, there’s a way.” And my heart... It. Just. Explodes. There’s no other word to describe it.”
― Jessie Walker, Where There's a Will

“Fear. It’s such a small word for what this is. So weak and mild. This is something else completely. Terror in its rawest, basest form. The kind that sinks into your bones, knits itself within your soul, as you realize in real-time that you’ll never escape this moment. It’ll be with you until you die, whether that’s tonight, tomorrow, or in the next fifty years. It’s the moment you lose the person you were, and you can’t do a fucking thing about it.”
― Jessie Walker, Little Bird Lost

“I don’t think she’d want you to be sad,” I tell him after a moment. “You never had a mom, but I do, and I’m pretty sure that’s, like, a rule or something. Moms don’t want their kids sad. Especially on birthdays.”
― Jessie Walker, Where There's a Will

“It’s a far worse fate than death, I imagine. To be caged.”
― Jessie Walker, Little Bird Lost

“Until one cold rainy day last September, when I realized I was no longer hanging on to her… But hanging on because of him.”
― Jessie Walker, All We Are

“But nothing. New York is you and Izzy and Waylon’s dream.” I press a hand to my chest. “Not mine.” Eyes creasing, he says, “What’s your dream then?” You. You’re my dream.”
― Jessie Walker, Every Breath After: Part 1

“I hate you.” If this is hate, baby, I think, licking across his teeth, I don’t know if I’d survive your love.”
― Jessie Walker, Where There's a Will

“You said something once,” he adds quietly after a moment. “When you were four or five, maybe? I don’t know, but you were young. I was in town for the weekend, and I was watching you for the night. We were watching some Disney movie, I think? I don’t remember which one, but…” He trails off, inhaling deeply. Frowning, I look up at him. He smiles sadly, searching my gaze. “You asked if boys get princes too.”
― Jessie Walker

“Beauty means nothing, if you’re ugly in here.” She presses a hand against my chest, over my heart. “Be kind to people, and you’ll be the handsomest, prettiest boy of all.”
― Jessie Walker, Every Breath After: Part 1

“Waylon taps the mic a couple times, waiting for the crowd to quiet. Smirking, he presses his mouth to where his fingers just were. “Hi.” Annnndddddd there goes my boxers.”
― Jessie Walker, Where There's a Will

“He blinks. “I don’t give a shit. Just don’t burn the place down.” Rolling her eyes, she pushes past him to head toward the steps. “Jesus, you start a fire one time...”
― Jessie Walker, Where There's a Will

“I gotta go.” His lashes flutter rapidly, startled. “What?” I walk around him, attention laser-focused on the pile of clothes I left by the bathroom door. The shirt’s wrinkled to shit, and I’m pretty sure there’s a blue vomit stain on my jeans, but at least my boxers are relatively clean. A hand grips my shoulder from behind just as I reach the door to the bathroom. “Don’t.” I freeze. With my back still to Waylon, I slide my eyes shut and count to three. “Don’t what?” His breaths seem to have sped up, and I can feel the warm puffs of air on my naked back. That’s how close he is. “Go,” he says so quietly I nearly miss it. “Don’t...go. Just⁠—”
― Jessie Walker, Where There's a Will

“You stared first”
― Jessie Walker, Exiled

“His fingers grab onto the back of my head, yanking me back by the hair. Through his teeth, right against my parted, panting mouth, he snarls, “I hate you.” I smile a sad, breathy smile against his bared teeth. “Show me.” Another growl scrapes out of him at the same time his lips come crashing down on mine.”
― Jessie Walker, Where There's a Will

“Storms and all.”
― Jessie Walker, Exiled

“What can I say? I’m a Scorpio. Blame it on the stars.” He gives me a funny look. “Your birthday’s in May, dude. You’re a fucking Taurus.”
― Jessie Walker, Where There's a Will

“His dark blond hair curls over his eyes, and I just...I can’t resist. Not anymore. Not now, when he looks so damn peaceful. Quiet. The guy’s rarely ever fucking quiet. I card my fingers through the pieces, brushing them away. I tell myself I’ll just stay here for a minute. Just a minute... I’m not sure when I cave and gather his head in my lap, but here we are. My fingers play idly with his hair as I stare blankly at the wall.”
― Jessie Walker, Where There's a Will

“He doesn’t smell like the ocean anymore. But he still smells like mine.”
― Jessie Walker, Exiled