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Haunted
Haunted is a novel made up of stories: twenty-three of the most horrifying, hilarious, mind-blowing, stomach-churning tales you'll ever encounter.
The stories are told by people who have all answered an ad headlined 'Artists Retreat: Abandon your life for three months'. They are led to believe that here they will leave behind all the distractions of 'real life' that are keeping them from creating the masterpiece that is in them.
But 'here' turns out to be a cavernous and ornate old theater where they are utterly isolated from the outside world - and where heat and power and, most importantly, food are in increasingly short supply. And the more desperate the circumstances become, the more desperate the stories they tell - and the more devious their machinations to make themselves the hero of the inevitable play/movie/non-fiction blockbuster that will certainly be made from their plight.
The stories are told by people who have all answered an ad headlined 'Artists Retreat: Abandon your life for three months'. They are led to believe that here they will leave behind all the distractions of 'real life' that are keeping them from creating the masterpiece that is in them.
But 'here' turns out to be a cavernous and ornate old theater where they are utterly isolated from the outside world - and where heat and power and, most importantly, food are in increasingly short supply. And the more desperate the circumstances become, the more desperate the stories they tell - and the more devious their machinations to make themselves the hero of the inevitable play/movie/non-fiction blockbuster that will certainly be made from their plight.
419 pages, Paperback
First published June 21, 2005
About the author
Chuck Palahniuk
232 books130k followersWritten in stolen moments under truck chassis and on park benches to a soundtrack of The Downward Spiral and Pablo Honey, Fight Club came into existence. The adaptation of Fight Club was a flop at the box office, but achieved cult status on DVD. The film’s popularity drove sales of the novel. Chuck put out two novels in 1999, Survivor and Invisible Monsters. Choke, published in 2001, became Chuck’s first New York Times bestseller. Chuck’s work has always been infused with personal experience, and his next novel, Lullaby, was no exception. Chuck credits writing Lullaby with helping him cope with the tragic death of his father. Diary and the non-fiction guide to Portland, Fugitives and Refugees, were released in 2003. While on the road in support of Diary, Chuck began reading a short story entitled 'Guts,' which would eventually become part of the novel Haunted.
In the years that followed, he continued to write, publishing the bestselling Rant, Snuff, Pygmy, Tell-All, a 'remix' of Invisible Monsters, Damned, and most recently, Doomed.
Chuck also enjoys giving back to his fans, and teaching the art of storytelling has been an important part of that. In 2004, Chuck began submitting essays to ChuckPalahniuk.net on the craft of writing. These were 'How To' pieces, straight out of Chuck's personal bag of tricks, based on the tenants of minimalism he learned from Tom Spanbauer. Every month, a “Homework Assignment” would accompany the lesson, so Workshop members could apply what they had learned. (all 36 of these essays can currently be found on The Cult's sister-site, LitReactor.com).
Then, in 2009, Chuck increased his involvement by committing to read and review a selection of fan-written stories each month. The best stories are currently set to be published in Burnt Tongues, a forthcoming anthology, with an introduction written by Chuck himself.
His next novel, Beautiful You, is due out in October 2014.
In the years that followed, he continued to write, publishing the bestselling Rant, Snuff, Pygmy, Tell-All, a 'remix' of Invisible Monsters, Damned, and most recently, Doomed.
Chuck also enjoys giving back to his fans, and teaching the art of storytelling has been an important part of that. In 2004, Chuck began submitting essays to ChuckPalahniuk.net on the craft of writing. These were 'How To' pieces, straight out of Chuck's personal bag of tricks, based on the tenants of minimalism he learned from Tom Spanbauer. Every month, a “Homework Assignment” would accompany the lesson, so Workshop members could apply what they had learned. (all 36 of these essays can currently be found on The Cult's sister-site, LitReactor.com).
Then, in 2009, Chuck increased his involvement by committing to read and review a selection of fan-written stories each month. The best stories are currently set to be published in Burnt Tongues, a forthcoming anthology, with an introduction written by Chuck himself.
His next novel, Beautiful You, is due out in October 2014.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 6,229 reviews
October 22, 2010
I'm only on p 75 of this thing and I'm about to hurl it at the wall. What is it supposed to be? Does this guy really think these lame parodies are funny? This is from the section called "Slumming", which is about rich people, a couple of whom are pretending to be poor :
"Inky always said being absent is the new being present." (p 69)
"Poverty, Inky says, is the new wealth." (p71)
"Social divers, Inky says, are the new social climbers." (p71)
"Nobodies are the new celebrity." (p72)
"Public is the new private" (p 72)
You get the picture - how could you not - it's the same joke repeated over and over again, a joke which Tom Wolfe was cracking in 1975 (black is the new black, with variations). So : is this supposed to be amusing? Because if so, it really isn't. Is it supposed to be stupid? Because if so, it really is.
Prior to this chapter you get a spoof all about television and advertising. I find myself bleeding profusely from the extreme cutting edge qualities of this book every time I pick it up. Not! Ha-ha! ROTFLMAO!! Only in the world of Chuck, this would be ROTFLMPO - that's right, Roll On The Floor Laughing My Penis Off! Ha ha! Why? Because it's gross, and it isn't that funny!
**
Update : the hurl has now been performed, and Chuck Palahnik's Haunted sailed in a graceful arc then smashed against the wall, its guts spilled out and several rodents started gnawing them...oh shut up.
"Inky always said being absent is the new being present." (p 69)
"Poverty, Inky says, is the new wealth." (p71)
"Social divers, Inky says, are the new social climbers." (p71)
"Nobodies are the new celebrity." (p72)
"Public is the new private" (p 72)
You get the picture - how could you not - it's the same joke repeated over and over again, a joke which Tom Wolfe was cracking in 1975 (black is the new black, with variations). So : is this supposed to be amusing? Because if so, it really isn't. Is it supposed to be stupid? Because if so, it really is.
Prior to this chapter you get a spoof all about television and advertising. I find myself bleeding profusely from the extreme cutting edge qualities of this book every time I pick it up. Not! Ha-ha! ROTFLMAO!! Only in the world of Chuck, this would be ROTFLMPO - that's right, Roll On The Floor Laughing My Penis Off! Ha ha! Why? Because it's gross, and it isn't that funny!
**
Update : the hurl has now been performed, and Chuck Palahnik's Haunted sailed in a graceful arc then smashed against the wall, its guts spilled out and several rodents started gnawing them...oh shut up.
December 4, 2013
Apparently working in a vet clinic for the better part of 5 years is precisely the recipe required to inure one to the effects of Palahniuk's writing.
You'll see tons of "OMG SO GWOSS!!" reviews here, but this ain't one of 'em. I was entertained. All the blood-and-guts and bodily fluids in the world don't really gross me out. What really sickens me is people.
And that's what Palahniuk does best: he writes about the dark sides of people and how precious little it takes to make those sides surface. I enjoyed turning the pages as each character tells his or her tale of how they had sunk so low. Even more fascinating was how each character manages to keep upping the suffering ante when they perceive they've not endured enough.
And don't take Palahniuk's pretentious tale of Saint Gut-Free's story making people pass out at face value. I even read it three times through trying to see how that could make someone's knees buckle... because I didn't feel it. Perhaps I truly did gain something from those years of shoveling shit from kennels and picking teeth out of the tub drain and plucking bits of unidentifiable flesh from surgery floors: I gained the ability not be grossed out on a dare.
You'll see tons of "OMG SO GWOSS!!" reviews here, but this ain't one of 'em. I was entertained. All the blood-and-guts and bodily fluids in the world don't really gross me out. What really sickens me is people.
And that's what Palahniuk does best: he writes about the dark sides of people and how precious little it takes to make those sides surface. I enjoyed turning the pages as each character tells his or her tale of how they had sunk so low. Even more fascinating was how each character manages to keep upping the suffering ante when they perceive they've not endured enough.
And don't take Palahniuk's pretentious tale of Saint Gut-Free's story making people pass out at face value. I even read it three times through trying to see how that could make someone's knees buckle... because I didn't feel it. Perhaps I truly did gain something from those years of shoveling shit from kennels and picking teeth out of the tub drain and plucking bits of unidentifiable flesh from surgery floors: I gained the ability not be grossed out on a dare.
December 4, 2013
This book is vile. It is disgusting. No matter how much you can take, you will squirm and say "Oh My GOD!" out loud on the bus or plane or couch or wherever it is you read. It is a nasty book. But Haunted is so much more than that and so worth reading.
Haunted is set in a drab old theater, past it's prime, boarded up, invisible, and impenetrable to the outside world. Inside the theater are 23 characters. 23 people with names like the Earl of Slander and Agent Tattletale. Each character is introduced with a poem and a story. Usually gruesome or grotesque, the stories eventually create the world each person inhabits, explain why they agreed to drop off the face of the earth for a while, and how they relate to the other characters in the book. Narratives in between the character stories relate what's happening within the hotel. How the characters are coping with no modern amenities or food, who has died and what the remaining characters will do to themselves and others to obtain fame and sympathy once they're rescued.
While the stories in the book are (as everyone has said) sometimes depraved, they all aren't like that and the book ends on a beautifully optimistic note - though not everyone is going to think that way. Really, I can only think of two that made me want to stop reading, but I didn't - I pushed through. And I encourage anyone who is thinking of reading Haunted to do the same thing. You might just love it to death.
Haunted is set in a drab old theater, past it's prime, boarded up, invisible, and impenetrable to the outside world. Inside the theater are 23 characters. 23 people with names like the Earl of Slander and Agent Tattletale. Each character is introduced with a poem and a story. Usually gruesome or grotesque, the stories eventually create the world each person inhabits, explain why they agreed to drop off the face of the earth for a while, and how they relate to the other characters in the book. Narratives in between the character stories relate what's happening within the hotel. How the characters are coping with no modern amenities or food, who has died and what the remaining characters will do to themselves and others to obtain fame and sympathy once they're rescued.
While the stories in the book are (as everyone has said) sometimes depraved, they all aren't like that and the book ends on a beautifully optimistic note - though not everyone is going to think that way. Really, I can only think of two that made me want to stop reading, but I didn't - I pushed through. And I encourage anyone who is thinking of reading Haunted to do the same thing. You might just love it to death.
November 2, 2022
The clue was in the title, a gore-fest, a book of horrors by the audaciously demented Chuck Palahniuk! Now think of the way Palahniuk writes, now imagine him writing horror? Yeah - that's what happens here.
Answering an advert people agree to go to a writing retreat - people such as Lady Baglady, Sister Vigilante and Chef Assassin! The retreat leader wants them to share stories, and to encourage them locks them in a self contained building. Between each story telling the first person plural narrator shares the hilarious, but deadly descent into madness, starvation, violence and murder, that the group goes into; meanwhile they are all still in hope of having the best story/version of this horrific experience, when they're rescued, to make them famous! This main plot is crammed full of ultra-shocking moments. Do ya trig?
The short stories told by the guests are an eclectic bunch mostly taken from experiences of the storytellers. The first tale 'Guts' is famous for making people faint at Palahniuk's public live-readings! Palahniuk's horror writing is intentionally full of hardcore genre busting darkness, absurdities and humour on the edge. One of the cover quotes best describes this book "brutally graphic". After rereading, a slight drop to a weaker Three Star, 7 out of 12, as all the short stories are OK, but not that interesting, and the main overarching plot just goes on for too long, and went super dark too quickly.
2020 read; 2007 read
Answering an advert people agree to go to a writing retreat - people such as Lady Baglady, Sister Vigilante and Chef Assassin! The retreat leader wants them to share stories, and to encourage them locks them in a self contained building. Between each story telling the first person plural narrator shares the hilarious, but deadly descent into madness, starvation, violence and murder, that the group goes into; meanwhile they are all still in hope of having the best story/version of this horrific experience, when they're rescued, to make them famous! This main plot is crammed full of ultra-shocking moments. Do ya trig?
The short stories told by the guests are an eclectic bunch mostly taken from experiences of the storytellers. The first tale 'Guts' is famous for making people faint at Palahniuk's public live-readings! Palahniuk's horror writing is intentionally full of hardcore genre busting darkness, absurdities and humour on the edge. One of the cover quotes best describes this book "brutally graphic". After rereading, a slight drop to a weaker Three Star, 7 out of 12, as all the short stories are OK, but not that interesting, and the main overarching plot just goes on for too long, and went super dark too quickly.
2020 read; 2007 read
July 17, 2007
This is honestly the worst book I have ever read. I finished it, only because of my amazement at how bad it was and how it never deviated from that.
I was intrigued by the premise: a group of writers volunteer to go on a retreat to write their masterpiece. The book has a chapter of plot, followed by either a poem or short story from one of the participants. Sounds cool!
The book falls apart immediately. All of the stories/poems are obviously written by the same person. They share themes, style, and emotion. Plus, they all suck, not to mention some are gross, just for the sake of being gross.
Furthermore, all of the losers on this retreat so desperately want fame, they start sacrificing themselves to make a more heroic tale of their seclusion.
My only hope was that it would turn out to be ONE GUY with multiple personalities fighting writer's block. THAT would have been cool, but no, it wasn't.
Don't read this book!
I was intrigued by the premise: a group of writers volunteer to go on a retreat to write their masterpiece. The book has a chapter of plot, followed by either a poem or short story from one of the participants. Sounds cool!
The book falls apart immediately. All of the stories/poems are obviously written by the same person. They share themes, style, and emotion. Plus, they all suck, not to mention some are gross, just for the sake of being gross.
Furthermore, all of the losers on this retreat so desperately want fame, they start sacrificing themselves to make a more heroic tale of their seclusion.
My only hope was that it would turn out to be ONE GUY with multiple personalities fighting writer's block. THAT would have been cool, but no, it wasn't.
Don't read this book!
May 12, 2008
This book is incredibly uneven, that's its downfall. There are some really good moments, some really bad moments, and one or two truly brillant ones. Looking at it as what it essentially is; a collection of short stories, it's really no better or worse than any other short story collection, and actually should get extra points for its brazen audacity. The unifying material that links all of the stories together is terribly weak, and is what ultimately sinks the book.
The first story "Guts" is the best. Not because it's so incredibly gross (and it truly is) but because it is unblinking in its logic. It creates an outrageous yet believable scenerio and follows inexorably to its horrifying conclusion. It's the one story that really stuck with me on a visceral (ha ha) level.
The rest of the book reads like it's trying to keep up with the pace of the first story, but it can't. No story that follows is a strongly written or as moving as the first one, but more just shock value for shock's sake. For every story that almost hits the right stride (Exodus) there are those that just plain don't make sense (Punch Drunk, Something's Got to Give)
This is the second Palanhuik book that I've read, and I think there really is something there. I appreciate his outrage at society, but I think he needs to dial back his delivery just a hair in order to create truly effective satire. He goes from 0-60 so quickly that the social commentary gets lost in the absurdity of the scenerio. If you can't believe it's possible, it doesn't hit home. Writers like Vonnegut push right to the boundary, then siddle a toe past. Palanhuik sprints to the boundary, then vaults as far as he can go. Vonnegut is a razor, Palanhuik is a blunt instrument.
I'm not done with him yet, he's at least shown me enough to give him another try.
The first story "Guts" is the best. Not because it's so incredibly gross (and it truly is) but because it is unblinking in its logic. It creates an outrageous yet believable scenerio and follows inexorably to its horrifying conclusion. It's the one story that really stuck with me on a visceral (ha ha) level.
The rest of the book reads like it's trying to keep up with the pace of the first story, but it can't. No story that follows is a strongly written or as moving as the first one, but more just shock value for shock's sake. For every story that almost hits the right stride (Exodus) there are those that just plain don't make sense (Punch Drunk, Something's Got to Give)
This is the second Palanhuik book that I've read, and I think there really is something there. I appreciate his outrage at society, but I think he needs to dial back his delivery just a hair in order to create truly effective satire. He goes from 0-60 so quickly that the social commentary gets lost in the absurdity of the scenerio. If you can't believe it's possible, it doesn't hit home. Writers like Vonnegut push right to the boundary, then siddle a toe past. Palanhuik sprints to the boundary, then vaults as far as he can go. Vonnegut is a razor, Palanhuik is a blunt instrument.
I'm not done with him yet, he's at least shown me enough to give him another try.
February 2, 2013
Warning: The cover of this edition glows in the dark. Do not place on your bed stand unless you want to have a heart attack. I speak from experience.
There are 21 short stories in Haunted. Some of them are amazing such as the notorious "Guts". Others are so-so. A couple of them are just boring. All of them are written to shock yet the brevity of the tales keeps both writer and reader focused. If this was a short story collection, I would rate it a strong three stars.
Unfortunately it is not. Palahniuk has fashioned this book into a novel. One clearly modeled after The Tales of The Decameron except as written by a 21th century Marquis De Sade. The 19 protagonists are revealed from the beginning as vicious and stupid and we are never given a reason to care about them. Page after page they make insane and idiotic decisions that have no basis in any logic or reality and no purpose but to shock. Some may say that is the point, the author has created a bizarre and surreal horror setting as an analogy. That's fine but what is the author saying? My conclusion is absolutely nothing. Palahnuik's cynicism is so over the top it destroys any attempt at meaning.
Perhaps I don't get "it". Yet anyone who perused my book list knows I'm not easily offended. This is the third book by this author I've read. The only reason I read three is because Pahalnuik is one hell of a writer at least technically. And from the short stories in this book I know he can pack a punch when he wants to. But this will probably the last Palahnuik book I will subject myself to.
There are 21 short stories in Haunted. Some of them are amazing such as the notorious "Guts". Others are so-so. A couple of them are just boring. All of them are written to shock yet the brevity of the tales keeps both writer and reader focused. If this was a short story collection, I would rate it a strong three stars.
Unfortunately it is not. Palahniuk has fashioned this book into a novel. One clearly modeled after The Tales of The Decameron except as written by a 21th century Marquis De Sade. The 19 protagonists are revealed from the beginning as vicious and stupid and we are never given a reason to care about them. Page after page they make insane and idiotic decisions that have no basis in any logic or reality and no purpose but to shock. Some may say that is the point, the author has created a bizarre and surreal horror setting as an analogy. That's fine but what is the author saying? My conclusion is absolutely nothing. Palahnuik's cynicism is so over the top it destroys any attempt at meaning.
Perhaps I don't get "it". Yet anyone who perused my book list knows I'm not easily offended. This is the third book by this author I've read. The only reason I read three is because Pahalnuik is one hell of a writer at least technically. And from the short stories in this book I know he can pack a punch when he wants to. But this will probably the last Palahnuik book I will subject myself to.
November 7, 2007
WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD.
Instead of reviewing the entire novel, I will just be focusing on my personal favourite chapter "Guts".
To date, there have been 53 known occurrences of audience members fainting during readings of “Guts”. This doesn’t surprise me at all, knowing the repulsive content of the story.
"Guts" is your mother, father, preacher and teacher shaking that disapproving finger at self pleasure. Needless to say, this short story will have you thinking twice about creeping that wondering hand down your pants at night. The narrator Saint Gut-Free (who’s alias is explained at the end of the chapter) a specifically terrifying masturbation escapade. While finding satisfaction in his family pool by sticking his rear end in the water intake at the bottom of the pool, Gut-Free finds his small intestines -in Layman’s terms- being sucked out of his asshole. All the while submerged under water. In a desperate attempt to reach the surface for air, he gnaws through the innards with his own teeth. We have all studied anatomy and know that human waste passes through the small intestine before happily plopping down in your toilet. Let’s just assume that Gut-Free wasn’t enjoying a delicious five-star meal. However, the tale doesn’t end here. The Saint’s original motive in the pool was achieved, and the left over sperm later impregnated his younger sister while she was enjoying an evening swim. It’s not shocking that the family had the child aborted before it could be conceived by the preteen girl.
Now, when asked why he is oh so heroinly chic thin, Saint Gut -Free can only smile. His six inches of remained small intestines don't allow much room for weight gain. Thus he is "Gut-Free".
Not only did this tale send shivers down my spine, but a suppressed chuckle in my throat as well. I found Palahniuk's writing style to be unique and innovative. What captured me the most was the straight-forward, bare-all tone that was conveyed through the narrator. He, a self diagnosed compulsive masturbator and sex addict explains his experience all too vividly. It makes the reader feel as if they too are chowing down on feces infested intestines in a swimming pool. And of course I mean that in the best way possible.
Instead of reviewing the entire novel, I will just be focusing on my personal favourite chapter "Guts".
To date, there have been 53 known occurrences of audience members fainting during readings of “Guts”. This doesn’t surprise me at all, knowing the repulsive content of the story.
"Guts" is your mother, father, preacher and teacher shaking that disapproving finger at self pleasure. Needless to say, this short story will have you thinking twice about creeping that wondering hand down your pants at night. The narrator Saint Gut-Free (who’s alias is explained at the end of the chapter) a specifically terrifying masturbation escapade. While finding satisfaction in his family pool by sticking his rear end in the water intake at the bottom of the pool, Gut-Free finds his small intestines -in Layman’s terms- being sucked out of his asshole. All the while submerged under water. In a desperate attempt to reach the surface for air, he gnaws through the innards with his own teeth. We have all studied anatomy and know that human waste passes through the small intestine before happily plopping down in your toilet. Let’s just assume that Gut-Free wasn’t enjoying a delicious five-star meal. However, the tale doesn’t end here. The Saint’s original motive in the pool was achieved, and the left over sperm later impregnated his younger sister while she was enjoying an evening swim. It’s not shocking that the family had the child aborted before it could be conceived by the preteen girl.
Now, when asked why he is oh so heroinly chic thin, Saint Gut -Free can only smile. His six inches of remained small intestines don't allow much room for weight gain. Thus he is "Gut-Free".
Not only did this tale send shivers down my spine, but a suppressed chuckle in my throat as well. I found Palahniuk's writing style to be unique and innovative. What captured me the most was the straight-forward, bare-all tone that was conveyed through the narrator. He, a self diagnosed compulsive masturbator and sex addict explains his experience all too vividly. It makes the reader feel as if they too are chowing down on feces infested intestines in a swimming pool. And of course I mean that in the best way possible.
October 15, 2019
Actual rating 4.5/5 stars.
Twenty-three individuals with twenty-three tales to tell. The characters have been brought together but a notice, which reads: 'Artists Retreat: Abandon your life for three months'. Disparate in personality, background, culture, and class, they are forced to inhabit the same dank space and dine on the same lack lustre meals for three long months, as they pen the creative projects of their dreams. They also share a little of themselves, more than they would actually probably like, and the results are collected here. A snippet of their time together, a poem for the individual, and a story from their past. Three things each for twenty-three people.
Before beginning this I knew precisely two things about it - that it involved masturbation and body horror. But, oh it also evolved into so much more than that! This was by far one of the most distressing, disturbing, and disgusting things I have ever read and I bloody loved every page of it! Palahniuk sets out to entirely gross out his readers and succeeds almost immediately. He also, however, conjoins the blood and guts, and other bodily fluids that float about in abundance in these pages, with a sound and intriguing narrative.
I was compelled to keep reading by equal parts morbid curiosity and nagging mystery. What I didn't expect, as I continued further, is a stunningly deep social commentary and the clever ways in which horror is created from the banal and everyday of life.
I can't say I enjoyed a page of this, as the roiling sickness in my stomach, can attest to, but I was engaged throughout. Palahniuk is quickly becoming one of the oddest yet brilliant writers I have ever had the sick glee of reading.
Twenty-three individuals with twenty-three tales to tell. The characters have been brought together but a notice, which reads: 'Artists Retreat: Abandon your life for three months'. Disparate in personality, background, culture, and class, they are forced to inhabit the same dank space and dine on the same lack lustre meals for three long months, as they pen the creative projects of their dreams. They also share a little of themselves, more than they would actually probably like, and the results are collected here. A snippet of their time together, a poem for the individual, and a story from their past. Three things each for twenty-three people.
Before beginning this I knew precisely two things about it - that it involved masturbation and body horror. But, oh it also evolved into so much more than that! This was by far one of the most distressing, disturbing, and disgusting things I have ever read and I bloody loved every page of it! Palahniuk sets out to entirely gross out his readers and succeeds almost immediately. He also, however, conjoins the blood and guts, and other bodily fluids that float about in abundance in these pages, with a sound and intriguing narrative.
I was compelled to keep reading by equal parts morbid curiosity and nagging mystery. What I didn't expect, as I continued further, is a stunningly deep social commentary and the clever ways in which horror is created from the banal and everyday of life.
I can't say I enjoyed a page of this, as the roiling sickness in my stomach, can attest to, but I was engaged throughout. Palahniuk is quickly becoming one of the oddest yet brilliant writers I have ever had the sick glee of reading.
January 28, 2015
The literary equivalent of belching the alphabet.
March 11, 2021
Had this book on my shelf for years and i finally decided to make a go at it.
I'm halfway through it and I'm just not into it, so I'm giving up because I can be reading something that I find likeable.
It's like I'm missing something with this book and it's not making sense to me, I guess it's not my style.
I'd also like to point out that there's way too many underdeveloped characters in this and that was another reason for DNF at halfway.
I've read a few Palahniuk books and Choke just happens to be the funniest book I've ever read, I consider him a very skillful author but Haunted isn't to my taste.
My next read of his will be 'Survivor' anyone read that one??
I'm halfway through it and I'm just not into it, so I'm giving up because I can be reading something that I find likeable.
It's like I'm missing something with this book and it's not making sense to me, I guess it's not my style.
I'd also like to point out that there's way too many underdeveloped characters in this and that was another reason for DNF at halfway.
I've read a few Palahniuk books and Choke just happens to be the funniest book I've ever read, I consider him a very skillful author but Haunted isn't to my taste.
My next read of his will be 'Survivor' anyone read that one??
December 7, 2023
I read 98 pages and I'm dnfing it. I have really enjoyed Chuck Palahniuk before but this didn't do anything for me. It just feels like a bunch if words that in the end don't make me feel anything and I can't really tell the point of this. I own this and maybe I'll go back to this at one point?
August 17, 2007
This is chuck's worst work. It pains me to say that, but its just true. a group of would-be writers on a writer's retreat each is given the chance to tell a story. The stories are all basically gross for the sake of being gross with little to no redeeming value.
One infamous story involving a pool was so hard to get through I had to take 3 breaks. Its so descriptive and disgusting I had to take a breather for fear of vomiting (i am not alone in this, he read this particular story at signings and people would have to leave the room, some even threw up right there)
I guess if you judge a story's value by how much of a physical response it can incite, then this is Grade A material. Otherwise I would say to avoid this one until you have read a good amount of his earlier work so as not to taint your judgement.
One infamous story involving a pool was so hard to get through I had to take 3 breaks. Its so descriptive and disgusting I had to take a breather for fear of vomiting (i am not alone in this, he read this particular story at signings and people would have to leave the room, some even threw up right there)
I guess if you judge a story's value by how much of a physical response it can incite, then this is Grade A material. Otherwise I would say to avoid this one until you have read a good amount of his earlier work so as not to taint your judgement.
March 16, 2015
"My goal was just to write some new form of horror story, something based on the ordinary world. Without supernatural monsters or magic. This would be a book you wouldn't want to keep next to your bed. A book that would be a trapdoor down into some dark place. A place only you could go, alone, when you opened the cover.
Because only books have that power."
Chuck is right; you don't want to keep this book by your bed. You don't want to get up in the middle of the night and see is covet glowing at you. Reminding you instantly of the horrors you read before bed, making your stomach churn. This is a book you can't read while eating, or when your wanting to relax. This isn't a book that will take you away from the real world. This book is a bitch slap in the face reminder that some of these horrors that you will read happen in the world around you, and will make you nauseous and shift around in your seat from discomfort. This book will make you glance up nervously, wondering if the others in the room with you can sense that your reading something so horrifically sick. You will feel like you need to shower after reading some of these stories, that your brain needs deep cleaning. But it won't help. These stories are going to stick in your brain. You're going to feel guilty for enjoying this book. This sick, sick horrific book.
Because only books have that power."
Chuck is right; you don't want to keep this book by your bed. You don't want to get up in the middle of the night and see is covet glowing at you. Reminding you instantly of the horrors you read before bed, making your stomach churn. This is a book you can't read while eating, or when your wanting to relax. This isn't a book that will take you away from the real world. This book is a bitch slap in the face reminder that some of these horrors that you will read happen in the world around you, and will make you nauseous and shift around in your seat from discomfort. This book will make you glance up nervously, wondering if the others in the room with you can sense that your reading something so horrifically sick. You will feel like you need to shower after reading some of these stories, that your brain needs deep cleaning. But it won't help. These stories are going to stick in your brain. You're going to feel guilty for enjoying this book. This sick, sick horrific book.
July 25, 2024
Palahniuk's "Haunted" is famous for its format - a short story collection embedded in a frame narrative that mocks the attention economy - and the first story-within-the-story, "Guts", about a freak masturbation accident (don't ask). But above anything, this book is: Looooooong. And listen, I'll readily admit that I'm not a short story aficionada in general, but the whole thing is just too silly and too forced to fulfill its horror ambitions as well.
Let's look at the composition for a sec: The narrative frame tells the story of 17 people who have signd up for a writers' retreat, but then get locked up by the organizer for three months in order to force them to produce super-great art. As these jaded, caricature-esque individuals know how the media and marketing work, they set out to produce extra drama and hardship, planning to sell their experiences afterwards - which of course gets out of control. In between, we get prose poems and 23 (!!) short stories presenting the individual participants in the retreat.
And while these stories are supposed to be told by different people, they all sound the same, and the whole shtick gets tired rather quickly. It's a mixture of disgusting and silly, involving a cast of over-the-top stock characters, which can be entertaining, but not with that page count and predictable frame narrative. Frankly, I don't quite get why this book is brought up again and again when it comes to American horror.
Fight Club is still great though! ;-)
Let's look at the composition for a sec: The narrative frame tells the story of 17 people who have signd up for a writers' retreat, but then get locked up by the organizer for three months in order to force them to produce super-great art. As these jaded, caricature-esque individuals know how the media and marketing work, they set out to produce extra drama and hardship, planning to sell their experiences afterwards - which of course gets out of control. In between, we get prose poems and 23 (!!) short stories presenting the individual participants in the retreat.
And while these stories are supposed to be told by different people, they all sound the same, and the whole shtick gets tired rather quickly. It's a mixture of disgusting and silly, involving a cast of over-the-top stock characters, which can be entertaining, but not with that page count and predictable frame narrative. Frankly, I don't quite get why this book is brought up again and again when it comes to American horror.
Fight Club is still great though! ;-)
December 4, 2013
People who are just trying to be gross can't help but be entertaining, no matter how see-thru their intent. You can't ignore the little boy who's trying to wipe his boogers on you, and when his parents have finally collared him, with anger and gag relex fully suppressed you have to admit the whole thing was actually pretty funny.
Chuck Paloonyhoonyhookiak is just trying to wipe his boogers on you. When he's done with that, he'll gladly exhaust whatever other bodily fluids happen to be available to him. His novels seem to have been steadily leading up to this: a good old-fashioned gross-out fest, a chance for him to pull out all the stops and just have fun.
I settled into "Haunted", prepared for the worst/best, and got it with the first story, "Guts". This is the one that's apparently been making people faint at readings (though how anyone can actually lose consciousness simply listening to someone read something fictional, no matter how shocking, is beyond me), and it really is genuinely disgusting. Yet fun to read, a vomitrous tale well told.
Unfortunately, the rest of the stories simply don't latch onto this gory glee, and, apart from a surprising and amusing tale of a hospice patient who is and isn't what he seems to be, the book becomes more and more of a slog, with a wraparound narrative peopled with irritatingly-named victims (I can't hope to adequately express how thankful I am that I'm unlikely to ever again encounter a character in literature named "Comrade Snarky") meeting their inevitably vile ends. It's ultimately a letdown, but do check out "Guts", if you're into this sort of thing.
Chuck Paloonyhoonyhookiak is just trying to wipe his boogers on you. When he's done with that, he'll gladly exhaust whatever other bodily fluids happen to be available to him. His novels seem to have been steadily leading up to this: a good old-fashioned gross-out fest, a chance for him to pull out all the stops and just have fun.
I settled into "Haunted", prepared for the worst/best, and got it with the first story, "Guts". This is the one that's apparently been making people faint at readings (though how anyone can actually lose consciousness simply listening to someone read something fictional, no matter how shocking, is beyond me), and it really is genuinely disgusting. Yet fun to read, a vomitrous tale well told.
Unfortunately, the rest of the stories simply don't latch onto this gory glee, and, apart from a surprising and amusing tale of a hospice patient who is and isn't what he seems to be, the book becomes more and more of a slog, with a wraparound narrative peopled with irritatingly-named victims (I can't hope to adequately express how thankful I am that I'm unlikely to ever again encounter a character in literature named "Comrade Snarky") meeting their inevitably vile ends. It's ultimately a letdown, but do check out "Guts", if you're into this sort of thing.
March 27, 2023
.. 𝑫𝒊𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒄𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒐
Una poesia della 𝙍𝙚𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙖 𝘼𝙧𝙘𝙤𝙗𝙖𝙡𝙚𝙣𝙤
Sul palco, al posto di un riflettore, il frammento di un film:
Se potessimo vendere la morte meglio di com'è, la venderemmo alla grande.
Ho affrontato dolori strazianti, veder morire il proprio padre tra le tue braccia non è assolutamente una cosa da augurare a nessuno, ma ti rendi conto di quanto hai voluto che lui morisse, solo per vederlo smettere di soffrire.
Stiamo vicino ai nostri cari solo nel momento in cui sappiamo che li stiamo perdendo, è un dato di fatto. Non siamo in grado di vivere a pieno la nostra vita se non attaccandoci al dolore e all'odio.
Il dolore e l'odio e l'amore e la gioia e la guerra esistono perché siamo noi a volerli.. E vogliamo che tutto sia così drammatico per preparaci alla prova finale che ci aspetta: affrontare la morte.
Amiamo il dramma. Amiamo il conflitto. Abbiamo bisogno di un demone, o ce ne creeremo uno.
Altri eventi - quelli che non riesci a digerire - ti avvelenano. Le parti peggiori della tua vita, i momenti di cui non puoi parlare, ti fanno marcire dall'interno.
Ma le storie che riesci a digerire, che puoi raccontare... quei momenti del passato li puoi controllare. Foggiare, lavorare. Dominare. E usarli per il tuo stesso bene.
Quelle storie hanno la stessa importanza del cibo.
Le puoi usare per far ridere la gente, per farla piangere o darle la nausea. Oppure per spaventarla. Per farla sentire come ti sei sentito tu. Per contribuire a smaltire quel momento del passato, tanto per te quanto per loro. Finché quel momento non sarà morto. Consumato. Digerito. Assorbito.
È così che riusciamo a digerire tutta la merda che ci capita.
Se riusciamo a perdonare ciò che gli altri ci hanno fatto...
Se riusciamo a perdonare ciò che noi abbiamo fatto agli altri...
Se riusciamo a prendere congedo da tutte le nostre storie. Dal nostro essere carnefici o vittime.
Solo allora, forse, potremo salvare il mondo.
Non esistono le favole vero Chuck?
Quando ho voglia di star male, prendere sberle in faccia per farmi aprire gli occhi leggo Palahniuk, da tutte le storie intricatamente mostruose, spietate e ciniche riesco a mettermi a nudo, senza pietà.
No, non lo consiglio questo libro, non se non avete mai letto nulla di Chuck.
Tra quelli letti è il più " macabro", per nulla rilassante.
Vincitore assoluto del contest letterario resta San Vuotabudella, una storia che ti lascia il segno e .....voi maschietti, per amor di dio, non cercate il piacere con metodi alquanto discutibili....
Una poesia della 𝙍𝙚𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙖 𝘼𝙧𝙘𝙤𝙗𝙖𝙡𝙚𝙣𝙤
Sul palco, al posto di un riflettore, il frammento di un film:
Se potessimo vendere la morte meglio di com'è, la venderemmo alla grande.
Ho affrontato dolori strazianti, veder morire il proprio padre tra le tue braccia non è assolutamente una cosa da augurare a nessuno, ma ti rendi conto di quanto hai voluto che lui morisse, solo per vederlo smettere di soffrire.
Stiamo vicino ai nostri cari solo nel momento in cui sappiamo che li stiamo perdendo, è un dato di fatto. Non siamo in grado di vivere a pieno la nostra vita se non attaccandoci al dolore e all'odio.
Il dolore e l'odio e l'amore e la gioia e la guerra esistono perché siamo noi a volerli.. E vogliamo che tutto sia così drammatico per preparaci alla prova finale che ci aspetta: affrontare la morte.
Amiamo il dramma. Amiamo il conflitto. Abbiamo bisogno di un demone, o ce ne creeremo uno.
Altri eventi - quelli che non riesci a digerire - ti avvelenano. Le parti peggiori della tua vita, i momenti di cui non puoi parlare, ti fanno marcire dall'interno.
Ma le storie che riesci a digerire, che puoi raccontare... quei momenti del passato li puoi controllare. Foggiare, lavorare. Dominare. E usarli per il tuo stesso bene.
Quelle storie hanno la stessa importanza del cibo.
Le puoi usare per far ridere la gente, per farla piangere o darle la nausea. Oppure per spaventarla. Per farla sentire come ti sei sentito tu. Per contribuire a smaltire quel momento del passato, tanto per te quanto per loro. Finché quel momento non sarà morto. Consumato. Digerito. Assorbito.
È così che riusciamo a digerire tutta la merda che ci capita.
Se riusciamo a perdonare ciò che gli altri ci hanno fatto...
Se riusciamo a perdonare ciò che noi abbiamo fatto agli altri...
Se riusciamo a prendere congedo da tutte le nostre storie. Dal nostro essere carnefici o vittime.
Solo allora, forse, potremo salvare il mondo.
Non esistono le favole vero Chuck?
Quando ho voglia di star male, prendere sberle in faccia per farmi aprire gli occhi leggo Palahniuk, da tutte le storie intricatamente mostruose, spietate e ciniche riesco a mettermi a nudo, senza pietà.
No, non lo consiglio questo libro, non se non avete mai letto nulla di Chuck.
Tra quelli letti è il più " macabro", per nulla rilassante.
Vincitore assoluto del contest letterario resta San Vuotabudella, una storia che ti lascia il segno e .....voi maschietti, per amor di dio, non cercate il piacere con metodi alquanto discutibili....
August 6, 2012
The book was a difficult read. Even more difficult to review. I struggled with how many stars to give it to the point where I've waited a few weeks to even write a review. It wasn't my favorite book by any means but I didn't hate it either. What it did do was stir so much visceral emotion that I haven't been able to pick up another book since. A reaction that intense warrants recognition so I reluctantly opted for 4 stars purely on its dark influence over my joy of reading (or lack there of now). Any book that could turn me off from all other books for a while is a book that I'll be talking about for a long time.
This novel is not a book I would recommend lightly. It is not a book that I would recommend to many people at all in fact. The reader is going to require a specific taste in entertainment to be able to, first of all, finish the book and, second, do it and still consider me a friend afterwards. The overall disturbing and disjointed nature of the novel takes an attention span and an iron stomach. The twisted black humor will be lost on most but the few able to see it will enjoy the social commentary on a society obsessed with fame at any cost and the overwhelming selfishness that can drive seemingly ordinary people to climb over one another's lifeless corpses to achieve it.
Do not pick this book up if you're a light reader. Do not pick this book up if you are not prepared. Do not pick this book up if you have a weak stomach. Do not pick this book up if you are easily offended. Do not pick this book up if you do not enjoy exploring the darker side of human nature. Do not pick this book up if you don't stifle a smile at the misfortune of your enemies. Do not pick this book up.
Really. I'd just go ahead and skip it.
This novel is not a book I would recommend lightly. It is not a book that I would recommend to many people at all in fact. The reader is going to require a specific taste in entertainment to be able to, first of all, finish the book and, second, do it and still consider me a friend afterwards. The overall disturbing and disjointed nature of the novel takes an attention span and an iron stomach. The twisted black humor will be lost on most but the few able to see it will enjoy the social commentary on a society obsessed with fame at any cost and the overwhelming selfishness that can drive seemingly ordinary people to climb over one another's lifeless corpses to achieve it.
Do not pick this book up if you're a light reader. Do not pick this book up if you are not prepared. Do not pick this book up if you have a weak stomach. Do not pick this book up if you are easily offended. Do not pick this book up if you do not enjoy exploring the darker side of human nature. Do not pick this book up if you don't stifle a smile at the misfortune of your enemies. Do not pick this book up.
Really. I'd just go ahead and skip it.
July 27, 2008
Sometimes in the humor section of the bookstore you can find a spoof of a popular book or writer. That's not what Haunted is, but it's the first thing that comes to mind.
While the cover promises that Haunted is "A Novel," the innards tell a different story: 24 short short stories and 24 prose poems tied together by a thin framing device. This frame is supposed to evoke storytelling parties of the past, such as the Canterbury Tales or the Decameron, in which the participants each tell a story. Henry James' "Turn of the Screw" was structured similarly. In Haunted, each of the semi-anonymous characters from the frame "novel" tell a story and have a poem told about them.
The problem with this approach is that every character tells their story as if they were Chuck Palahniuk, and about halfway through bits of the framing device start slipping into the stories. The novel itself is narrated in first-person although the narrator never participates in any of the activities of the others.
And oh, the activities! The basic hook for the novel here is that a group of aspiring writers have gone off on a weird "Writer's Retreat" in which they hole up in an abandoned movie theater somewhere for 90 days. The dust jacket tells us this is "a satire of reality television" -- and sure, the group of strangers locked in a house together is a common reality TV trope. But if this were a satire of Chuck Palahniuk, what would happen?
What would happen is that the writers would all have horrible personal problems, would begin worshiping at the First Church of Self-Destruction, they would start talking like coroners and doctors with jargon littering their dialogue, they would repeat themselves with a chorus, and they'd throw up a bunch of plot twists.
And that's just what happens. For no reason at all, except that the participants of this "Writer's Retreat" think they can cash in someday if they suffer enough, start chopping off fingers, starving themselves, sabotaging the environmental controls, and consuming human flesh.
Palahniuk is best when he's right at the edge of absurd. Fight Club was there. Survivor and Choke were at the precipice. Those novels worked. Even with its flaws, Rant toed the long drop. But Haunted hurls itself into the abyss, and I understand how Chuck writes and I understand how Chuck wants you to feel when you're reading his books, and this isn't it. This book makes you exclaim aloud "This is fucking ridiculous."
These complaints are all about the framing device, the Canterbury participants with stupid nicknames like "Earl of Slander" and "Lady Baglady." The morons like "The Matchmaker" or "Agent Tattletale" who chop off all but two of their fingers but are still described as holding objects.
if this were a Chuck Palahniuk satire, would one character chop off their penis and another choke to death on it? Would a story involving dressing in drag and getting your ass kicked lead to fundraising for crashing planes?
You bet it would.
Haunted is an obnoxious mess that fails to get any reader buy-in to the things the characters are doing, and Chuck's signature style is turned up to eleven -- to the point that you're constantly reminded that you're reading a book by an author with an identifiable style.
Would a Chuck Palahniuk satire be written that way?
So Haunted is, at best, a self-satire by a writer who maybe recognizes his own tropes and wants to poke a little bit of fun. At worst, it's an unsuccessful experiment at creating a compelling anthology novel.
The stories themselves are mostly really good, but as presented it feels like Chuck cleaned out a file named "Novel Ideas" and threw them into this stew instead of developing them individually.
Of stand-out note are "Guts," which Chuck read aloud on his "Diary" tour and was previously published in Playboy. It's plotless but has a decent 1-2-3 punch to it. "The Nightmare Box" is a great little scary story. "Dissertation" feels like it could get some legs under it. "Obsolete" is a fun piece of speculative fiction. "Evil Spirits" is good enough it should go somewhere, but it doesn't. Many of the others are simply average, and a few are completely forgettable ("Ritual", "Green Room", "Speaking Bitterness").
My advice: if you're going to read this book, skip the "Chapters" and the poems, and just read the stories. The attempt to add context to them with the weak writer's-retreat frame doesn't work.
While the cover promises that Haunted is "A Novel," the innards tell a different story: 24 short short stories and 24 prose poems tied together by a thin framing device. This frame is supposed to evoke storytelling parties of the past, such as the Canterbury Tales or the Decameron, in which the participants each tell a story. Henry James' "Turn of the Screw" was structured similarly. In Haunted, each of the semi-anonymous characters from the frame "novel" tell a story and have a poem told about them.
The problem with this approach is that every character tells their story as if they were Chuck Palahniuk, and about halfway through bits of the framing device start slipping into the stories. The novel itself is narrated in first-person although the narrator never participates in any of the activities of the others.
And oh, the activities! The basic hook for the novel here is that a group of aspiring writers have gone off on a weird "Writer's Retreat" in which they hole up in an abandoned movie theater somewhere for 90 days. The dust jacket tells us this is "a satire of reality television" -- and sure, the group of strangers locked in a house together is a common reality TV trope. But if this were a satire of Chuck Palahniuk, what would happen?
What would happen is that the writers would all have horrible personal problems, would begin worshiping at the First Church of Self-Destruction, they would start talking like coroners and doctors with jargon littering their dialogue, they would repeat themselves with a chorus, and they'd throw up a bunch of plot twists.
And that's just what happens. For no reason at all, except that the participants of this "Writer's Retreat" think they can cash in someday if they suffer enough, start chopping off fingers, starving themselves, sabotaging the environmental controls, and consuming human flesh.
Palahniuk is best when he's right at the edge of absurd. Fight Club was there. Survivor and Choke were at the precipice. Those novels worked. Even with its flaws, Rant toed the long drop. But Haunted hurls itself into the abyss, and I understand how Chuck writes and I understand how Chuck wants you to feel when you're reading his books, and this isn't it. This book makes you exclaim aloud "This is fucking ridiculous."
These complaints are all about the framing device, the Canterbury participants with stupid nicknames like "Earl of Slander" and "Lady Baglady." The morons like "The Matchmaker" or "Agent Tattletale" who chop off all but two of their fingers but are still described as holding objects.
if this were a Chuck Palahniuk satire, would one character chop off their penis and another choke to death on it? Would a story involving dressing in drag and getting your ass kicked lead to fundraising for crashing planes?
You bet it would.
Haunted is an obnoxious mess that fails to get any reader buy-in to the things the characters are doing, and Chuck's signature style is turned up to eleven -- to the point that you're constantly reminded that you're reading a book by an author with an identifiable style.
Would a Chuck Palahniuk satire be written that way?
So Haunted is, at best, a self-satire by a writer who maybe recognizes his own tropes and wants to poke a little bit of fun. At worst, it's an unsuccessful experiment at creating a compelling anthology novel.
The stories themselves are mostly really good, but as presented it feels like Chuck cleaned out a file named "Novel Ideas" and threw them into this stew instead of developing them individually.
Of stand-out note are "Guts," which Chuck read aloud on his "Diary" tour and was previously published in Playboy. It's plotless but has a decent 1-2-3 punch to it. "The Nightmare Box" is a great little scary story. "Dissertation" feels like it could get some legs under it. "Obsolete" is a fun piece of speculative fiction. "Evil Spirits" is good enough it should go somewhere, but it doesn't. Many of the others are simply average, and a few are completely forgettable ("Ritual", "Green Room", "Speaking Bitterness").
My advice: if you're going to read this book, skip the "Chapters" and the poems, and just read the stories. The attempt to add context to them with the weak writer's-retreat frame doesn't work.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 1, 2016
My God, what to say about this one? Probably this: Haunted was messed up and engaging to the fullest.
I'm always floored when an author serves up something genuinely different. In a book market where so many offerings are so goddamn painfully similar (right down to the titles... can we get another book with the word "Girl" or "Dark" in the title please?) it's a real treat when you read something that stands out and rises above the rest for not being like the others. It's even more rewarding when such a different drummer has the chops to blow your mind.
Haunted is a collection of stories and characters that will absolutely make your skin crawl, and it's mind-boggling how much territory it covers, almost all of it located in left field. It's doubtful that you've ever read anything quite comparable (that goes for most of Palahniuk's other work too). The way Chuck can expand an idea or create a plot from the most unexpected places, then making it compelling and riveting and... well, let's just say you've never read anything like it. Like the tale of man who literally lost his guts, or the sociopath with a bowling ball, or the cross-dressing terrorist, or the DIY porn couple gone wrong, or the foot masseur turned assassin... these are crazy, fascinating, disturbing tales you won't soon forget.
Haunted is gross. It's sick, twisted, funny, sad, shocking; hell it's practically a trigger for every intense feeling humans are capable of having. It's well-written and engaging and beyond all else it is different. And today's storytelling landscape definitely needs a lot more 'different'.
I'm always floored when an author serves up something genuinely different. In a book market where so many offerings are so goddamn painfully similar (right down to the titles... can we get another book with the word "Girl" or "Dark" in the title please?) it's a real treat when you read something that stands out and rises above the rest for not being like the others. It's even more rewarding when such a different drummer has the chops to blow your mind.
Haunted is a collection of stories and characters that will absolutely make your skin crawl, and it's mind-boggling how much territory it covers, almost all of it located in left field. It's doubtful that you've ever read anything quite comparable (that goes for most of Palahniuk's other work too). The way Chuck can expand an idea or create a plot from the most unexpected places, then making it compelling and riveting and... well, let's just say you've never read anything like it. Like the tale of man who literally lost his guts, or the sociopath with a bowling ball, or the cross-dressing terrorist, or the DIY porn couple gone wrong, or the foot masseur turned assassin... these are crazy, fascinating, disturbing tales you won't soon forget.
Haunted is gross. It's sick, twisted, funny, sad, shocking; hell it's practically a trigger for every intense feeling humans are capable of having. It's well-written and engaging and beyond all else it is different. And today's storytelling landscape definitely needs a lot more 'different'.
March 25, 2014
Find all of my reviews at: http://52bookminimum.blogspot.com/
4.5 Stars
A group of strangers responds to this advertisement and find themselves locked away – literally. With no way out and a cast of characters who aim to make their own personal experience worse than anyone else’s, the group soon finds themselves with no heat, little electricity and, let’s say, only unconventional food sources.
A novel woven together with short stories and “poems” – a reader like me who generally doesn’t appreciate the short story gets the best of both worlds. This is Palahniuk at his best. Worst???? I don’t even fucking know anymore. God he’s twisted. And awesome. And barf-inducing.
Whoops, wrong Barf.
Palahniuk immediately goes off the rails with the story “Guts”.
If you can make it through that tale, you’ll be able make it through the rest of the book – but not without asking yourself the question
If you’re extra lucky, you’ll find yourself being asked by your family members “why do you have that horrified look on your face?” and get a chance to share your experiences with the whole gang . . .
Family bonding at its best.
Oh Chuck, you sick bastard. When you’re on – you are ON, and I am left speechless. Recommended to????? If I want a clear conscience the answer should be ABSOLUTELY NO ONE, but in reality???? EVERYONE.
4.5 Stars
WRITER’S RETREAT:
ABANDON YOUR LIFE FOR THREE MONTHS.
Just disappear. Leave behind everything that keeps you from creating your masterpiece. Your job and family and home, all those obligations and distractions – put them on hold for three months. Live with like-minded people in a setting that supports total immersion in your work. Food and lodging included free for those who qualify. Gamble a small fraction of your life on the chance to create a new future as a professional poet, novelist, screenwriter. Before it’s too late, live the life you dream about. Spaces very limited.
A group of strangers responds to this advertisement and find themselves locked away – literally. With no way out and a cast of characters who aim to make their own personal experience worse than anyone else’s, the group soon finds themselves with no heat, little electricity and, let’s say, only unconventional food sources.
A novel woven together with short stories and “poems” – a reader like me who generally doesn’t appreciate the short story gets the best of both worlds. This is Palahniuk at his best. Worst???? I don’t even fucking know anymore. God he’s twisted. And awesome. And barf-inducing.
Whoops, wrong Barf.
Palahniuk immediately goes off the rails with the story “Guts”.
If you can make it through that tale, you’ll be able make it through the rest of the book – but not without asking yourself the question
If you’re extra lucky, you’ll find yourself being asked by your family members “why do you have that horrified look on your face?” and get a chance to share your experiences with the whole gang . . .
Family bonding at its best.
Oh Chuck, you sick bastard. When you’re on – you are ON, and I am left speechless. Recommended to????? If I want a clear conscience the answer should be ABSOLUTELY NO ONE, but in reality???? EVERYONE.
August 20, 2008
Don't be fooled, I may have chosen 5 stars for this novel, but not because I loved it. This book is dynamic.
This novel looks so innocent and harmless, sitting there with it's ghostly lavender and white cover and "Fight Club" was great, I'll give it a read.
This novel will stretch you to breaking point and beyond what you have ever read before. To give an example, when Chuck Palahniuk gives a public reading of the short story "Guts", the ambulance shows up before the end of it. People have fainted, vomited and moaned in disgust over this story. I was not able to read through the whole chapter, I felt very dizzy. And I think this is only chapter two. Things go awry when these strangers gather for a writing retreat and the rest seems like an experiment in how horrible people can possibly be to each other.
The format is an overarching story about the downward spiral of the retreat and peppered with the short stories of the attendees. The end short story is the best, if you can make it that far.
There is no "Love-hate" icon for this story. This book is horrifying in the experience; not unlike an STD it stays with you and you have to learn to live with the experience you had with it.
I want to recommend it, but I'm afraid it's like going to bed with someone and not telling them you have AIDS. The reason you don't want to tell them is that you want to share the misery.
You'll feel blindsided even if you are prepared for it.
I suppose this would be extreme reading; but is somewhat of an underground cult-classic. Bring it up with the artistic circles or geeks alike and you will have found at least one or more persons who's read "Guts" at least.
All in all Palahnuik has realized and exercised the right to be as explicit as possible, because books don't come with a Parental Advisory or MPAA rating.
I gave my copy away, but I downloaded the audio...
This novel looks so innocent and harmless, sitting there with it's ghostly lavender and white cover and "Fight Club" was great, I'll give it a read.
This novel will stretch you to breaking point and beyond what you have ever read before. To give an example, when Chuck Palahniuk gives a public reading of the short story "Guts", the ambulance shows up before the end of it. People have fainted, vomited and moaned in disgust over this story. I was not able to read through the whole chapter, I felt very dizzy. And I think this is only chapter two. Things go awry when these strangers gather for a writing retreat and the rest seems like an experiment in how horrible people can possibly be to each other.
The format is an overarching story about the downward spiral of the retreat and peppered with the short stories of the attendees. The end short story is the best, if you can make it that far.
There is no "Love-hate" icon for this story. This book is horrifying in the experience; not unlike an STD it stays with you and you have to learn to live with the experience you had with it.
I want to recommend it, but I'm afraid it's like going to bed with someone and not telling them you have AIDS. The reason you don't want to tell them is that you want to share the misery.
You'll feel blindsided even if you are prepared for it.
I suppose this would be extreme reading; but is somewhat of an underground cult-classic. Bring it up with the artistic circles or geeks alike and you will have found at least one or more persons who's read "Guts" at least.
All in all Palahnuik has realized and exercised the right to be as explicit as possible, because books don't come with a Parental Advisory or MPAA rating.
I gave my copy away, but I downloaded the audio...
January 24, 2008
I was really excited about this one after being disappointed with "Lullaby" and "Diary." Basically, it's a book of short stories each by a fictional author, each introduced by a poem about the writer, and linked together by mini-chapters about the writers' retreat they are all on. Trapped in a house and running out of food, they write, record, and videotape their experience, certain that when they are finally rescued, they will all become media darlings destined for reality tv fame, if any of them survive, that is. The first story, "Guts," had a reputation for making listeners pass out when Pahlaniuk read it aloud at book signings. My friend Jim and I also took great pleasure in reading that story aloud to oblivious victims. I think he even read it to his mom. My other favorite story is the one about the life-like dolls at the police station, just totally unbelievable. One critic complained that this book was "too over the top," and it's like, dude, what the fuck do you think the point was?
February 6, 2019
Disturbing. Nauseating. Twisted. Shocking. And at times, Funny. Yes, funny.
How is it possible that this book can be all of those things? I don't know, it just is and it works.
If you are the kind of person that likes a story that is different and strange, this is it.
It's the most disturbing book I've read by Palahniuk. The book is actually 23 stories that on face value are not connected at all. However, in this story they are connected and are woven together to make a greater and larger story. The novel's 19 characters define what it means to not work together as a team. They do everything possible that is destructive to self and to their group as a whole. They go to extraordinary lengths to undermine each other and they get great satisfaction in doing so.
I'm tempted to explain why but that would just be a massive spoiler and it's more fun to read the book with minimal input from reviews. Read and enjoy but don't say I didn't warn you.
How is it possible that this book can be all of those things? I don't know, it just is and it works.
If you are the kind of person that likes a story that is different and strange, this is it.
It's the most disturbing book I've read by Palahniuk. The book is actually 23 stories that on face value are not connected at all. However, in this story they are connected and are woven together to make a greater and larger story. The novel's 19 characters define what it means to not work together as a team. They do everything possible that is destructive to self and to their group as a whole. They go to extraordinary lengths to undermine each other and they get great satisfaction in doing so.
I'm tempted to explain why but that would just be a massive spoiler and it's more fun to read the book with minimal input from reviews. Read and enjoy but don't say I didn't warn you.
Shelved as 'd-n-f'
October 25, 2013I... I... I just.... WTF?!?!?!
Stopped on page 25 I can't finish this. I... this book is weird and disgusting and gut wrenching. I decided to read this book because I read in a group comment that it was the weirdest thing they've ever read. So I decided to give it a try... no. Just fucking no.
Stories about some kid sodomising himself with a fucking carrot and some Vaseline; a teenager jacking off with some candle wax -- THROUGH HIS PISS HOLE. The storyteller jacking off in a pool hovering over the pool's suction shit so it's basically eating his ass whilst he jacks off and next thing you know it's sucking up his guts and he has to eat his asshole out to save himself. Occasional sentences about doing what the French do or some weird shit...
No.
Stop.
What the fuck.
"My goal was just to write some new form of horror story, something based on the ordinary world. Without supernatural monsters or magic. This would be a book you wouldn't keep next to your bed." -- Chuck Palahniuk
Mr Palahniuk, this isn't horror, this is some vile shit, sir. Vile, vile, shit. I get you wanted horror without supernatural monsters or magic, but these stories are not it!. Read some of Stephen King's works for some real ordinary world horror -- Misery, for example. That's some nerve-racking stuff. That's horror. This... (shakes my head). My eyes felt as though they were about to pop out my head whilst I was reading.
Excuse me, going to brush my eyeballs and brain to remove the images and thoughts I've just read.
The author was right about one thing:
This is a book I will not be keeping next to my bed.
Stopped on page 25 I can't finish this. I... this book is weird and disgusting and gut wrenching. I decided to read this book because I read in a group comment that it was the weirdest thing they've ever read. So I decided to give it a try... no. Just fucking no.
Stories about some kid sodomising himself with a fucking carrot and some Vaseline; a teenager jacking off with some candle wax -- THROUGH HIS PISS HOLE. The storyteller jacking off in a pool hovering over the pool's suction shit so it's basically eating his ass whilst he jacks off and next thing you know it's sucking up his guts and he has to eat his asshole out to save himself. Occasional sentences about doing what the French do or some weird shit...
No.
Stop.
What the fuck.
"My goal was just to write some new form of horror story, something based on the ordinary world. Without supernatural monsters or magic. This would be a book you wouldn't keep next to your bed." -- Chuck Palahniuk
Mr Palahniuk, this isn't horror, this is some vile shit, sir. Vile, vile, shit. I get you wanted horror without supernatural monsters or magic, but these stories are not it!. Read some of Stephen King's works for some real ordinary world horror -- Misery, for example. That's some nerve-racking stuff. That's horror. This... (shakes my head). My eyes felt as though they were about to pop out my head whilst I was reading.
Excuse me, going to brush my eyeballs and brain to remove the images and thoughts I've just read.
The author was right about one thing:
This is a book I will not be keeping next to my bed.
October 5, 2024
I don’t write reviews.
Why, oh why, did I hate this so? Poor young Lizzie, she’ll never know. Old version me doesn’t have that problem. I thought this was one of Palahnuik’s best! His creativity and diversity (original definition, not newspeak) of storytelling was at its peak. I remember watching anthology movies and the wrap-around plot always felt contrived. Haunted was smoothly taut, like a perfectly wrapped leftover that you’re excited to eat. Maybe the curry is a little bit spicier for having sat overnight in the fridge. (That was a terrible simile. I’ve been putting off this thought-note because my brain is tired).
Though my imagery failed, Chuck’s surely did not. Each story was deliciously(?) interesting. I felt like an awful voyeur, watching the downfall of each character. The beauty, and ultimately, the horror, is that they all did this to themselves. Bad choices were made, repeatedly, souls were sold for IOU’s. No one could let go of the past, or stop catastrophizing about the future. Retelling their stories, they solidified themselves in the role of the victim, justifying their evil ways. Perhaps one or two were ready for redemption, but misery loves company and won’t allow escape.
“Some stories, you use up. Others, use you up.”
Book 17 - The Year of Chuck
Why, oh why, did I hate this so? Poor young Lizzie, she’ll never know. Old version me doesn’t have that problem. I thought this was one of Palahnuik’s best! His creativity and diversity (original definition, not newspeak) of storytelling was at its peak. I remember watching anthology movies and the wrap-around plot always felt contrived. Haunted was smoothly taut, like a perfectly wrapped leftover that you’re excited to eat. Maybe the curry is a little bit spicier for having sat overnight in the fridge. (That was a terrible simile. I’ve been putting off this thought-note because my brain is tired).
Though my imagery failed, Chuck’s surely did not. Each story was deliciously(?) interesting. I felt like an awful voyeur, watching the downfall of each character. The beauty, and ultimately, the horror, is that they all did this to themselves. Bad choices were made, repeatedly, souls were sold for IOU’s. No one could let go of the past, or stop catastrophizing about the future. Retelling their stories, they solidified themselves in the role of the victim, justifying their evil ways. Perhaps one or two were ready for redemption, but misery loves company and won’t allow escape.
“Some stories, you use up. Others, use you up.”
Book 17 - The Year of Chuck
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 5, 2022
5 Novembre 2022
Son passati poco più di 10 anni dalla prima lettura di questo libro di Chuck, ma le sensazioni son sempre le stesse, anzi son diverse, perchè io semplicemente non sono più quello di 10 anni fa. Pare un po' una supercazzola per accalappiare più consensi, un po' come han sempre fatto tutti i potenti del genere umano, su questo cazzo di pianeta. Povero pianeta, si ritrova con l'ultimo anello dell'evoluzione, con questi esseri, appunto noi umani, che girovagano come zombie, ma non lo sanno, anzi non lo sappiamo. Confenzioniamo le nostre belle e patriottiche guerre, ci pavoneggiamo, anzi no... mi scuso con i poveri pavoni, quindi: ci atteggiamo ad unici esseri viventi che possano sviluppare una coscienza e poi con essa che cosa facciamo? Soprusi, disuguaglianze, violenza di tutti i tipi, pregiudizi, malelingue e chissà quant'altro cazzo di schifo nauseabondo tiriamo fuori dalle nostre intelligenti menti coscienti. Ed allora ecco che arriva il buon Chuck e ce le spiattella tutte in faccia di queste nefandezze. Qui nell'universo di Cavie, troveremo di tutto e di più e condito alla perfezione, il piatto forte, la prelibatezza del momento, è la carie che noi esseri umani stiamo affondando in noi stessi giorno dopo giorno dopo giorno dopo giorno...
#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@
2012
Quanto è alto il prezzo che un essere umano è pronto a pagare per la sua brama di celebrità? Chi sarebbe disposto a passare tre mesi completamente isolato su un’isola deserta per ottenere i suoi quindici minuti di gloria?
Queste sono le domande fondamentali sulla vita, l'universo e tutto quanto di questo libro.
La storia ci viene raccontata dai protagonisti sotto forma di una sorta di diapositive del passato. Queste storie sono molto crude, inimmaginabili ed estreme, che quando le finisci ti sale da un lato della bocca quel ghigno solito di quando si vedono quei film demenziali che prendono per il culo altri film. Ma qui è diverso o perlomeno, a me, dopo il ghigno mi è salita una sorta di inquietudine, come se tra me e me dicessi:"C...o, ma non è poi così irreale...".
E come dice Ammaniti sulla copertina, Se avete lo stomaco debole, lasciatelo stare!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n_Mas...
Son passati poco più di 10 anni dalla prima lettura di questo libro di Chuck, ma le sensazioni son sempre le stesse, anzi son diverse, perchè io semplicemente non sono più quello di 10 anni fa. Pare un po' una supercazzola per accalappiare più consensi, un po' come han sempre fatto tutti i potenti del genere umano, su questo cazzo di pianeta. Povero pianeta, si ritrova con l'ultimo anello dell'evoluzione, con questi esseri, appunto noi umani, che girovagano come zombie, ma non lo sanno, anzi non lo sappiamo. Confenzioniamo le nostre belle e patriottiche guerre, ci pavoneggiamo, anzi no... mi scuso con i poveri pavoni, quindi: ci atteggiamo ad unici esseri viventi che possano sviluppare una coscienza e poi con essa che cosa facciamo? Soprusi, disuguaglianze, violenza di tutti i tipi, pregiudizi, malelingue e chissà quant'altro cazzo di schifo nauseabondo tiriamo fuori dalle nostre intelligenti menti coscienti. Ed allora ecco che arriva il buon Chuck e ce le spiattella tutte in faccia di queste nefandezze. Qui nell'universo di Cavie, troveremo di tutto e di più e condito alla perfezione, il piatto forte, la prelibatezza del momento, è la carie che noi esseri umani stiamo affondando in noi stessi giorno dopo giorno dopo giorno dopo giorno...
#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@
2012
Quanto è alto il prezzo che un essere umano è pronto a pagare per la sua brama di celebrità? Chi sarebbe disposto a passare tre mesi completamente isolato su un’isola deserta per ottenere i suoi quindici minuti di gloria?
Queste sono le domande fondamentali sulla vita, l'universo e tutto quanto di questo libro.
La storia ci viene raccontata dai protagonisti sotto forma di una sorta di diapositive del passato. Queste storie sono molto crude, inimmaginabili ed estreme, che quando le finisci ti sale da un lato della bocca quel ghigno solito di quando si vedono quei film demenziali che prendono per il culo altri film. Ma qui è diverso o perlomeno, a me, dopo il ghigno mi è salita una sorta di inquietudine, come se tra me e me dicessi:"C...o, ma non è poi così irreale...".
E come dice Ammaniti sulla copertina, Se avete lo stomaco debole, lasciatelo stare!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n_Mas...
December 13, 2022
*Reread Dec 2022 because I forgot basically everything.*
Maybe the least subtle book on earth. I’ve never been one for books that use shock-value for no greater purpose.
I also ran into the same issues I’ve had with CP books even when I was younger and more accepting of work that is trying very hard to be edgy. The messages are very repetitive and trite (Slumming being a prime example of this), and we get no credit as readers and are just spoon-fed, all through CP’s distinctive voice that makes it impossible to differentiate which character is supposed to be telling the stories. The chapters and poems are much of the same, but with significantly less value.
Maybe the least subtle book on earth. I’ve never been one for books that use shock-value for no greater purpose.
I also ran into the same issues I’ve had with CP books even when I was younger and more accepting of work that is trying very hard to be edgy. The messages are very repetitive and trite (Slumming being a prime example of this), and we get no credit as readers and are just spoon-fed, all through CP’s distinctive voice that makes it impossible to differentiate which character is supposed to be telling the stories. The chapters and poems are much of the same, but with significantly less value.
July 9, 2016
Ok this was a mammoth read- not because of it's 400+ pages or that the author decided to use words which would have scored double points in a Scrabble game - now simply because there is SO much going on. Which is great for a book to read but terrible to comment about when you have a self imposed rule of no spoilers. Well here goes but I promise nothing (apart from a headache)
The book follows a group of less than conventional and stereotypical struggling authors desperate to finish/tell their various tales.
And this is where things start getting tricky - you see there are stories within stories like an onion skin but rather than them being simple distractions or allegories for a different tale you quickly realise they are in fact something else.
They are part of over all narrative giving both colour and depth to the authors in the group along with filling in some of the blanks the first part of the story has.
They you have connecting pieces these are in effect a bridge between the two parts of the story. These give a different perspective and act as an interlude as you shift from one story to the next but without leaving sight of the first (if that makes sense)
Which you quickly realise something different again. After all considering the circumstances of writers group how can you have story told by a 3rd person unless someone in the group takes up the role of narrator but then it throws the aspects of the story up in the air once again.
In short there is a lot going on and I will admit that were several times when i had to stop and re-read something for my brain to add in the dotting line and light bulb finally is able to go on.
I know that Chuck Palahniuk is a highly accomplished author who has many famous accolades to his name which to me can be a knife that cuts both ways.
Yes he may be worthy of the praise and his works are joys to hold and read but it also sets the bar so high that disappointment is an almost accepted conclusion.
Well I can tell you this is not the case - yes there are cases when you want to shout at the characters, want to slap them or just turn away in disgust but to see it through is more compelling and I must admit I am glad that I did but like I say this is not an easy book to read.
The book follows a group of less than conventional and stereotypical struggling authors desperate to finish/tell their various tales.
And this is where things start getting tricky - you see there are stories within stories like an onion skin but rather than them being simple distractions or allegories for a different tale you quickly realise they are in fact something else.
They are part of over all narrative giving both colour and depth to the authors in the group along with filling in some of the blanks the first part of the story has.
They you have connecting pieces these are in effect a bridge between the two parts of the story. These give a different perspective and act as an interlude as you shift from one story to the next but without leaving sight of the first (if that makes sense)
Which you quickly realise something different again. After all considering the circumstances of writers group how can you have story told by a 3rd person unless someone in the group takes up the role of narrator but then it throws the aspects of the story up in the air once again.
In short there is a lot going on and I will admit that were several times when i had to stop and re-read something for my brain to add in the dotting line and light bulb finally is able to go on.
I know that Chuck Palahniuk is a highly accomplished author who has many famous accolades to his name which to me can be a knife that cuts both ways.
Yes he may be worthy of the praise and his works are joys to hold and read but it also sets the bar so high that disappointment is an almost accepted conclusion.
Well I can tell you this is not the case - yes there are cases when you want to shout at the characters, want to slap them or just turn away in disgust but to see it through is more compelling and I must admit I am glad that I did but like I say this is not an easy book to read.
April 16, 2014
This book is more of a 3.5 star read.
A group of people agree to participate in a "Writer's Retreat". Three months, food and lodging included, while you complete your masterpiece.
The stories begin with probably one of the best, most shocking short stories I've ever read-called Guts. You just have to see for yourself on that one. Some of the stories the people share are more interesting than others. That's why the 3.5 stars instead of higher. The thing that amazed me about this book was the way people act. The chapters that told what was going on in the house had me like this.
upload gif from url
Don't go into this book expecting an easy read though. Humanity at it's basest is what you will see. There are some queasy moments and I have a very stong stomach.
upload image online
I think someone said about this book that the stories didn't scare me...the way people act did.
A group of people agree to participate in a "Writer's Retreat". Three months, food and lodging included, while you complete your masterpiece.
The stories begin with probably one of the best, most shocking short stories I've ever read-called Guts. You just have to see for yourself on that one. Some of the stories the people share are more interesting than others. That's why the 3.5 stars instead of higher. The thing that amazed me about this book was the way people act. The chapters that told what was going on in the house had me like this.
upload gif from url
Don't go into this book expecting an easy read though. Humanity at it's basest is what you will see. There are some queasy moments and I have a very stong stomach.
upload image online
I think someone said about this book that the stories didn't scare me...the way people act did.
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