Anger Management Quotes

“Woe to him who offends a patient man who has just reached his limit.”
― Joyce Rachelle

“Start with very small experiments. When anger arises, stop! What is the hurry? When you feel hatred, wait! There should be some interval. Reply only when you are fully conscious – not until that. You will find that all that is sinful in life has fallen away from you; all that is wrong is banished forever. You will suddenly discover, there is no need to respond to anger. Perhaps you might feel like thanking the man who insults you. Because he has obliged you. He gave you an opportunity to awaken.
Kabir has said stay near the one who is critical of you. Look after him and serve him who is abusing you because it is he who gives you the opportunity to awaken.
All the occasions that drown you in unconsciousness can be turned into stepping stones to awareness if you wish so. Life is like a huge boulder lying in the middle of the road. Those who are foolish, see the stone as a barrier and turn back. For them the road is closed. Those who are clever, climb the stone and use it as a step. And the moment they make it a stepping stone greater heights are available to them.
A seeker should keep in mind only one factor, and that is: to utilize each moment to awaken awareness. Then be it hunger or anger or lust or greed, every state can be utilized towards awareness.”
― Osho, Bliss: Living beyond happiness and misery

“I curse when I get really upset. Letting off steam that way makes me feel a little bit better. I've been through a lot, but I have never had the urge to go postal. I thank fuck for that.”
― Oliver Markus Malloy, Bad Choices Make Good Stories - Going to New York

“Love is not the answer, peace is. Throughout my whole life I have experienced and seen others use love as a reason to treat people with unkindness by being controlling, jealous, shouting in anger, and projecting guilt and shame.

If you love someone but there is not peace in your heart when you think of that person then your work is not done. Do not stop at love, continue all the way towards the freedom of inner peace.

Love starts when peace begins. Without peace love is simply a mask for our insecurity, judgment, and egoic attachments.”
― Alaric Hutchinson

“Before you reach the point of forgiveness, you go through the phase where you pray... for every possible misfortune and ill luck to strike them dead while you sit and watch.”
― Joyce Rachelle

“The man who had abused him would ask, ”I abused you yesterday, why did you not reply yesterday? You are very strange.” No one waits for a second when you abuse him. He retorts immediately.”
Junnaid answered, ”My master taught me not to hurry in anything. Take some time. I must wait a little when someone insults me. If I were to give an immediate answer, the heat of the happening would catch hold of me; the smoke would blind my eyes. So I have to wait and let the cloud pass. When twenty-four hours have passed and the skies are clear again, then I can give my reply in full consciousness. Now I realize how tricky my guru was. Because I have never been able to answer my opponents since then.”
Is it possible to hold on to anger for twenty-four hours? It is impossible to maintain it for twenty-four minutes or even twenty-four seconds. The truth is that, even if you hold back and watch for a single second, the anger vanishes.
But you do not wait even for a moment. A person abuses you – as if someone switches the button, and the fan starts whirring. There is not the slightest gap between the two, no distance! And you pride yourself in your alertness! You have no control of yourself. How can an unconscious person be master of himself? Anybody can push the button and goad him into action. Someone comes and flatters you, and you are filled with joy; you are happy. Someone insults you, you are full of tears. Are you your own master or anyone can manipulate you? You are the slave of slaves. And those who are manipulating are not their own masters either! And the irony is that everyone is expert in manipulating others and none of them is conscious. What greater insult can there be for your soul than the fact that anyone can affect you?”
― Osho, Bliss: Living beyond happiness and misery

“A person who finds grace never lacks the courage to endure, remain resolute in principles and action in the face of an easy collapse into anger, insanity, and self-destruction when living in an increasing chaotic world filled with armed conflict, terrorism, and cultural discord.”
― Kilroy J. Oldster, Dead Toad Scrolls

“Sometimes, when you're feeling too much pain,
and it's unmanageable,
you let anger take over ..
Not that it's the best way out,
but it's kind of easier to control ..”
― Nouf Alfadl

“The danger of tolerating any hurtful behavior is that it can all too quickly become the norm. If we allow ourselves to "get away" with anything we know to be destructive - such as slapping a child or partner in the face - without taking responsibility for the gravity of what we have done, we are that much more likely to minimize the offense: "I may have overreacted, but she's got to learn not to set me off like that." . . . "because the partner is perceived as the cause of the violence, the perpetrator feels justified in using it." Once the actions are justified, they are more likely to be repeated.

It is also important to remember that, in most relationships, both parties engage in some form of the abuses listed above. Angry remarks or mildly aggressive actions - insulting someone's intelligence, throwing a plate of food against the wall - can both provoke and be used to justify retaliatory actions that may be more dangerous, like pushing and shoving someone down the stairs.

On the other hand, one sort of abuse does not necessarily lead to another. Rather, whether or not the violence escalates depends on the person committing it.”
― Linda G. Mills, Violent Partners: A Breakthrough Plan for Ending the Cycle of Abuse

“The quicker a person forgives other people for mistakes the sooner a person moves forward to live their own life free of disabling anger, resentment, bitterness, and regret.”
― Kilroy J. Oldster, Dead Toad Scrolls

“Laughter is much better than anger.”
― Wayne Gerard Trotman

“Fuck you! I pierced my nipples for her!”
― Stjepan Šejić, Sunstone, Vol. 5

“Before her angry impulses got the better of her, she admonished herself that she was born to win and that one did not win by throwing temper tantrums--at least not outside of one's own home, which could result in vicious, spurious rumors.”
― Anna Godbersen, Envy

“Besides, just being heard helps the other person calm down and feel less angry. We often yell when we are angry because we want to be Heard.”
― Rhoda Baruch, Creative Anger: Putting That Powerful Emotion to Good Use

“A little more compassion and a little less anger is what most of us need.”
― Wayne Gerard Trotman

“Trying to make sense of other people's responses to us is a basic human activity. Accepting a mother's [or anyone's] anger by concluding that i is justified is a way of making sense of a difficult relationship. But this acceptance comes at a great cost, for it means that we see their cruelty as our shame.”
― Terri Apter, Difficult Mothers: Understanding and Overcoming Their Power

“Confronting your enemy in anger feeds your ego, but diminishes your chance of success.”
― Shon Mehta, The Timingila

“I let my anger consume me.”

“It’s understandable,” she said.

“It may be understandable,” replied Pug, “but it is no more forgivable for being understandable.”
― Raymond E. Feist, Shards of a Broken Crown

“There are an incalculable—even infinite—number of situations in which we can practice forgiveness.

Expecting it to be a singular action—motivated by the sheer imperative to move on and forget—can be more damaging than the original feelings of anger.

Accepting forgiveness as pluralistic and as an ongoing, individualized process opens us up to realize the role that our own needs play in conflict resolution.”
― Sharon Salzberg, Real Love: The Art of Mindful Connection

“Transcending anger happens when we are able to commit to something greater than ourselves. And, ironically, sacrifice and concern for others are the best things we can do for ourselves. Solidifying our human ties sustains us in the time of greatest need and angst.”
― Rhoda Baruch, Creative Anger: Putting That Powerful Emotion to Good Use

“Couples counseling has long been banned from the list of acceptable treatments for domestic violence . . . "an inappropriate intervention that further endangers the woman." Schechter explained:

'It encourages the abuser to blame the victim by examining her "role" in his problem. By seeing the couple together, the therapist erroneously suggests that the partner, too, is responsible for the abuser's behavior. Many women have been beaten brutally following couples counseling sessions in which they disclosed violence or coercion. The abuser alone must take responsibility for the assaults and understand that family reunification is not his treatment goal; the goal is to stop the violence.”
― Linda G. Mills, Violent Partners: A Breakthrough Plan for Ending the Cycle of Abuse

“As Freud noted: "A thing which has not been understood inevitably reappears; like an unlaid ghost, it cannot rest until the mystery has been resolved and the spell broken." . . . in ambivalent attachment, a mother vacillates inexplicably from being loving and tender to angry and threatening.. Faced with this unpredictable inconsistency, a child tries to appease the mother, anxious to control and monitor her shifting moods.”
― Terri Apter, Difficult Mothers: Understanding and Overcoming Their Power

“Aristotle’s position on anger is that it is one of the most complex and distinctive of the human emotions, that it involves bodily, psychological, social, and moral dimensions, and that anger can and ought to be felt and acted upon in a number of right ways.”
― Gregory Sadler

“For most of us, It's easy to get mad but it is much easy to ignore the one who gets you mad.”
― Zybejta "Beta" Metani' Marashi

“One participant got so angry after thinking about the insulting feedback that hitting the punching bag wasn't enough: he punched a hole in the wall of the lab.”
― Adam M. Grant, Originals: How Non-Conformists Move the World

“I meditate; therefore, you live.”
― Neo Shamon

“But there are indeed specific obstacles to change, which different people experience in different ways. In some sense, what we are calling obstacles to change are actually defenses against some perceived threat if we change, so we persist in thoughts that were originally protective.

Identifying the things that get in our way as we want to change becomes complex and difficult.”
― Rhoda Baruch, Creative Anger: Putting That Powerful Emotion to Good Use

“The Psychotherapists Journey

I see your white glistening valley stretched ahead of me. The shimmering snow beckons me to touch, to feel, to surrender myself to its softness. Much as I long to put my prints upon the freshly fallen beauty of it, I know deep within me that unless I am wanted, the print is a temporary mark that is gone by Spring leaving no trace. If you allow me to touch below that surface to the solid earth that is your core, the mark is eternal and we both are changed deeply by the touching.

Bonnie Bull (1978)”
― Dr. Bonnie Bull

“Robert reflects:
I go weak at the knees when she turns against me. I forget what it's like to feel courage. I try to remind myself that the worst of it will pass, that she won't be like that forever. She's mad now, but there will come a time when she's not mad. When I was growing up, I tried all sorts of things to get me through these times. I used to think "It won't be so bad if she doesn't hit me." And then I got to noticing that whether or not she hit me didn't matter. What I was afraid of was that she was going to explode and disappear.”
― Terri Apter, Difficult Mothers: Understanding and Overcoming Their Power

“Some children [and adults] conclude that a parent's [or partner's] anger is justified. It can be more painful to believe that a parent is uncontrolled, unreasonable, and spiteful than to see yourself at fault. It can be more painful to look on confusion and chaos that to make sense of a parents behavior by concluding that you deserve her punishment.”
― Terri Apter