**spoiler alert** alright. I read it. I went with it. and i'm really disappointed. For like the first 84% of this, I legitimately enjoyed this book. S**spoiler alert** alright. I read it. I went with it. and i'm really disappointed. For like the first 84% of this, I legitimately enjoyed this book. Sure, Daphne and Simon were a touch overaggressive and had a bit too much lust in their relationship, but it was overall fine. Annoying, but fine.
And then what happened at the 85% mark?
rape.
just because they're married and just because a woman did it to a man does NOT make it okay. That was awful. And the fact that Daphne faced no consequences? she bloody didn't even feel bad?
Thanks to NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
I can't do it. I can't finish this book. I’ve picked it up and tried to read it exactlThanks to NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
I can't do it. I can't finish this book. I’ve picked it up and tried to read it exactly seven different times over the last three months.
I can't make it past page 66.
Of course I feel awful about it (even more so because it is an ARC), but it just isn't engaging enough to keep reading. Our heroine, Zarela, felt like every other YA fantasy heroine with a dead mom and daddy issues. While I loved the dragons and the Spain-inspired setting, pretty descriptions aren’t enough to save a book for me, and this one relied far too much on ✨Spanish dragon aesthetic✨ at the expense of the characters and story.
I’m genuinely sorry for it, but this one’s gonna have to be a no from me :(
Ratings: Star Rating: ★★☆☆☆ If This Book Was a Movie Rating: PG-13
Recommendations That Are Better Than This Book: Belladonna by Adelyn Grace The Darkening by Sunya Mara...more
Thanks to NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
When I first requested this on Netgalley, I was literally over the moon. A heroine witThanks to NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
When I first requested this on Netgalley, I was literally over the moon. A heroine with infertility issues, IVF, falling for your donor, it just all sounded so unique and completely out of the box, I was HERE for it.
But after struggling through *that*, I swear I’d just dump the book and try to forget it ever existed if I wasn’t obligated to review this for Netgalley.
let’s keep this brief and start with the premise, shall we?
“Meet Gemma Jacobs. She’s driven, energetic, and a positive thinker. She has a great career working for famed self-help guru Ian Fortune, she lives in a cute studio apartment in Manhattan, and her family is supportive and loving (albeit a little kooky). Her life is perfect. Absolutely wonderful.
Except for one tiny little thing.
After a decade of disastrous relationships and an infertility diagnosis, Gemma doesn’t want a Mr. Right (or even a Mr. Right Now), she just wants a baby. And all she needs is an egg, some sperm, and IVF.
So Gemma makes a New Year’s resolution: have a baby.
Josh Lewenthal is a laid back, relaxed, find-the-humor-in-life kind of guy. The polar opposite of Gemma. He’s also her brother’s best friend. For the past twenty years Josh has attended every Jacobs’ family birthday, holiday, and event – he’s always around.
Gemma knows him. He’s nice (enough), he’s funny (-ish), he’s healthy (she thinks) and he didn’t burn any ants with a magnifying glass as a kid. Which, in Gemma’s mind, makes him the perfect option for a sperm donor.
So Gemma wants to make a deal. An unemotional, businesslike arrangement. No commitments, just a baby.
To Gemma’s surprise, Josh agrees.
They have nothing in common, except their agreement to make a baby and their desire to keep things businesslike.
But the thing about baby-making…it’s hard to keep it businesslike, it’s nearly impossible to keep it unemotional, and it’s definitely impossible to keep your heart out of the mix. Because when you’re making a baby together, things have a way of starting to feel like you’re making other things too – like a life, and a family, and love. And when the baby-making ends, you wish that everything else didn’t have to end too.”
*sighs deeply*
See, there was potential. It was squandered pretty quickly, but it was there.
plot discussion first.
So as mentioned in the premise, our heroine was diagnosed with stage four endometriosis. To put it simply, this disorder means it’s physically impossible for her to have children. As a side note, it’s awesome that the author chose to write a romance with infertility. It’s something many couples have to navigate and work through, and I love seeing that representation in this book ...more
i tried. i really really tried. but when a book describes its hero with the word "big" exactly 328 times, i cannot legitimately enjoy it.i tried. i really really tried. but when a book describes its hero with the word "big" exactly 328 times, i cannot legitimately enjoy it....more
Thanks to NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
I was so bloody excited for this book. I adored the cover, I adored the premise, I adoThanks to NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
I was so bloody excited for this book. I adored the cover, I adored the premise, I adored the spunky elven fire horses.
But this book missed on one very important, very key idea:
You don’t mix music industry talent agents and Wood Kings. You don’t mix Birkenstocks and blood magic tithes. And you really don’t mix Hydroflasks and faeries.
It just isn’t done.
and that is why Isabelle dnf'ed this one.
let’s kick off this review with a synopsis, shall we?
"No matter how far she runs, the forest of Edgewood always comes for Emeline Lark. The scent of damp earth curls into her nose when she sings and moss creeps across the stage. It’s as if the woods of her childhood, shrouded in folklore and tall tales, are trying to reclaim her. But Emeline has no patience for silly superstitions.
When her grandfather disappears, leaving only a mysterious orb in his wake, the stories Emeline has always scoffed at suddenly seem less foolish. She enters the forest she has spent years trying to escape, only to have Hawthorne Fell, a handsome and brooding tithe collector, try to dissuade her from searching.
Refusing to be deterred, Emeline finds herself drawn to the court of the fabled Wood King himself. She makes a deal—her voice for her grandfather’s freedom. Little does she know, she’s stumbled into the middle of a curse much bigger than herself, one that threatens the existence of this eerie world she’s trapped in, along with the devastating boy who feels so familiar.
With the help of Hawthorne—an enemy turned reluctant ally who she grows closer to each day—Emeline sets out to not only save her grandfather’s life, but to right past wrongs, and in the process, discover her true voice."
Yeah, it’s weird.
To be perfectly honest, I believe that was the problem with 99% of this book’s plot. It was just too odd. Trying to connect with the character’s modern music career in one sentence, and then learning that trees talk in this random magical forest in the other was just whiplash. I just couldn’t wrap my head around it, and thus could not bring myself to give a bloody care.
Next, the characters.
The characters didn’t do anything to redeem the plot. Everyone was relatively forgettable, but Emeline Lark, our main girl, was the worst of the lot. In fact, she was so horrifically forgettable, I actually had to go look up her name in order to write this review *sighs dramatically*
Her entire personality was getting her old grandfather who suffers from dementia back from the Wood King, and she literally dropped her life, everyone in her life, all of her auditions, her shows, and her music to get this man back. She basically sacrifices several big opportunities in auditions for this guy.
And did I care about him?
Nope.
Like, intellectually, I know he is our main girl’s grandpa and he’s really truly very important to her, but it was bloody difficult to care about the guy because there was no actual description or memories of him for me to connect with.
AND THEN she has the same "sacrificial" mindset with this other random boy she met in the Edgewood forest:
"She forgot all about the Daybreak reps. Forgot about music contracts. Forgot about the woods and Edgewood and everything she'd left behind to pursue her oldest dream.
She would not be taunted by this boy."
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW THIS BOY'S NAME AT THIS POINT IN THE STORY AND THAT'S THE POWER YOU'RE GIVING HIM? Ha. You give me nothing, I give you nothing ...more
Let me intro this by saying I ADORED the Love Hypothesis. Five stars and a chef's kiss.
But this.
THIS.
THIS GETS ONE BLOODY STAR and i have barely eveLet me intro this by saying I ADORED the Love Hypothesis. Five stars and a chef's kiss.
But this.
THIS.
THIS GETS ONE BLOODY STAR and i have barely ever been so disappointed with a book in my life.
*screams into pillow*
The characters were cardboard, the plot was vanilla, the romantic tension was nonexistent, and let me actually start this review before i spill everything in the intro.
“As an environmental engineer, Mara knows all about the delicate nature of ecosystems. They require balance. And leaving the thermostat alone. And not stealing someone else’s food. And other rules Liam, her detestable big-oil lawyer of a roommate, knows nothing about. Okay, sure, technically she’s the interloper. Liam was already entrenched in his aunt’s house like some glowering grumpy giant when Mara moved in, with his big muscles and kissable mouth just sitting there on the couch tempting respectable scientists to the dark side…but Helena was her mentor and Mara’s not about to move out and give up her inheritance without a fight.
The problem is, living with someone means getting to know them. And the more Mara finds out about Liam, the harder it is to loathe him…and the easier it is to love him.”
SEE THE AMOUNT OF POTENTIAL THIS THING HAD? AND WHERE DID IT ALL END UP? THE TRASH, THAT’S WHERE.
ugh let’s begin with the plot.
So you remember how the Love Hypothesis had this whole side plot about Olive trying to obtain funding for her liver cancer research and overcoming sexism and harassment in the workplace? Yeah, well, the research/science angle was barely in this one. For being a so-called woman in engineering, we never get even one scene of Mara at her engineering company, we never learn what projects she’s working on, and the most sciencey thing this college-certified engineer does is deconstruct a microwave. I mean, even an engineering-disliking girl such as myself can deconstruct a microwave by throwing it out the window.
Mara does mention how her sexist boss dismisses her and her ideas and then takes credit for her work, but at best, it's merely touched on. No specificity. An annoyance mentioned in passing, instead of giving Mara a fight and life outside of her relationship with Liam.
The rest of the plot is easily broken down into two recurring events: Liam and Mara being mad at/getting to know each other and Mara ranting about Liam to her friends.
also hearing those cringy science jokes on audiobook was just plain painful.
It's all very vanilla and bland and tame, BUT. RIGHT AT THE END OF THE NOVEL. THEY CONFESS THEIR FEELINGS AND THEN THE ENTIRE LAST 16% OF THIS NOVELLA WAS A *GRAPHIC* BEDROOM SCENE. i was so annoyed i skipped over the whole thing, but i heard from GR besties it was cringier than those science jokes.
so there’s that.
ONTO THE CHARACTERSSSS
The MCs (and the maybe two side characters) are cardboard flat people made of toddler emotions and vanilla extract. Every other page for the first third of the book, Mara declares her passionate and vehement hatred for Liam Harding.
Why, might you ask?
Ha! How dare you suggest there be a reason for such passion? That’s not important. The point is, they hate each other. DESPISE each other.
Don’t question it.
Anyways, because this reason was so obscure, I obviously missed how this mortal hatred originated when I first read it. So I went back to recheck the intro. And you know what the reason was?
THEIR LIVING HABITS.
THEY HATED EACH OTHER’S LIVING HABITS.
Mara’s psycho fantasies about violently maiming Liam were because of HOW HE LIVED IN HIS OWN HOUSE??? THAT HE OWNED???
ugh.
Aside from her psychopathic tendencies (which seem to be present in all Hazelwood's heroines, I just finished Love on the Brain ...more
“Books are easily destroyed. But words will live as long as people can remember them.”
OMIGOSH THIS BOOK. THIS BOOK WAS SO MUCH BETTER THAN SHATTER ME.“Books are easily destroyed. But words will live as long as people can remember them.”
OMIGOSH THIS BOOK. THIS BOOK WAS SO MUCH BETTER THAN SHATTER ME. GUYS I’M SO HAPPYYYY
Warner is rapidly discarding his toxicity and rising in my esteem, Kenji is still our favorite comedic legend, Adam became easier to dislike, and even Juliette mildly improved. This SO exceeded my expectations and I’m positively thrilled about it *heart eyes*
LETS GET STARTED
warning: for the rest of the review, there will be spoilers for the first book (Shatter Me) but no spoilers for this book (Unravel Me).
Juliette’s made her choice. Juliette, Adam, and Kenji have escaped Warner, fleeing to the safety of Omega Point. Omega Point is the base of the most prominent rebels fighting against The Reestablishment. Like Juliette, most of them were persecuted for their abnormal abilities: telekinesis, elasticity, healing, invisibility, etc. Here, Juliette begins to learn to fight her demons, control her powers, and attack The Reestablishment on rebel missions. Things are looking up, but there are still questions to answer. How is their rebellion going to be able to upstage The Reestablishment? If contact with Juliette’s skin is lethal, how is Adam able to touch her? And for that matter, why can Warner touch her?
The plot was 100% much more lively and entertaining than the first book. One thing I loved in particular about the plot (other than all its customary addictiveness :)) was how all the plot twists and explanations for powers actually made SENSE. Like Juliette’s breaking of concrete walls (even though her established power is her deadly skin) had a legitimate explanation that was SATISFYING. DO Y’ALL KNOW HOW RARE GOOD EXPLANATIONS ARE.
okiee now that’s done character time.
Adam Kent. So for starters, this man is not my fav. I tolerated him in Shatter Me, but he’s definitely gotten a tad more manipulative and possessive. Not enough for me to outright despise him, but we’re getting closer. [post-Ignite-Me-update: WELL I NOW OUTRIGHT DESPISE HIM ADAM IS A COMPLETELY POSSESSIVE JERK SEDEFOIESDFH KICK HIM OUT THIS MOMENT] Probably my favorite part about Adam is his love for his younger brother James. James is the most adorable child protect this precious boy at all costs <3
Kenji Kishimoto. Here are some quotes because Isabelle just cannot do this man justice.
“Please—please get up—and lower your voice—” “Heck no.” “Why not?” I’m pleading now. “Because if I lower my voice, I won’t be able to hear myself speak. And that,” he says, “is my favorite part.”
“Are you kidding?” I stop in the middle of the kitchen. Spin around. My face is pulled together in disbelief. “You’ve spoken to me maybe once in the two weeks I’ve been here. I hardly even notice you anymore.” “Okay, hold up,” he says, turning to block my path. “We both know there’s no way you haven’t noticed all of this” — he gestures to himself — “so if you’re trying to play games with me, I should let you know up front that it’s not going to work.” “What?” I frown. “What are you talking abou—” “You can’t play hard to get, kid.” He raises an eyebrow. “I can’t even touch you. Takes ‘hard to get’ to a whole new level, if you know what I mean.” “Oh my gosh,” I mouth, eyes closed, shaking my head. “You are insane.” He falls to his knees. “Insane for your sweet, sweet love!”
*dies laughing* Nothing more needs to be said.
Juliette Ferrars. My main gripe in this book was Juliette. She was soooooo reluctant to trust anyone it just became irritating. She’s being helped by everyone in Omega Point, including the leader and freaking KENJI so I was like literally stop complaining. The sole reason her whining wasn’t a dealbreaker was because I get that everyone in Juliette’s life (including her parents) had said their actions were for Juliette’s benefit, and then treated her like trash. They hated her, abused her, and threw her into an insane asylum in the name of “helping” her. So I understood that she had a lot of trauma and problems. I just didn’t like her reaction to them very much. HOWEVER, besides that, this girl was worlds better than the half-psycho we met in Shatter Me. High five for this queen-in-training.
Aaron Warner. You know, I used to not like the name Aaron. Ha. That opinion changed quickly. This man has improved so much from the toxic leader from Shatter Me, I literally could not believe how good a job Mafi did with him. now I can say WARNER YOU ARE AMAZING AND STUNNING AND 100% A SECRET CINNAMON BUN WILL YOU BE MY NEW BOOK BOYFRIEND YES YES PLEASE I LOVE U SMMMM <33 I have no idea how you fell in love with Juliette the Airhead, but I can forgive the oversight mainly BECAUSE THE WAY YOU MELT WITH HER AHHHH Y’ALL GO SEARCH WARNETTE QUOTES THERE’S TOO MANY TO PUT HERE HFOSEHFIOEOSFIS
anyways.
message me more Warnette fanart because apparently I need that for life now thank you very much love you all <33
Violet Made of Thorns was one of my most anticipated reads of 2022. I was intrigued by the morally-gray-heroine premise, added it immediately after heViolet Made of Thorns was one of my most anticipated reads of 2022. I was intrigued by the morally-gray-heroine premise, added it immediately after hearing the romance was compared to Jude and Cardan from the Cruel Prince, and queen Chloe Gong’s personal recommendation never hurt anyone ...more
This book is not a brilliant work of classic literature. It’s not a richly gorgeous high fantasy. This is not a romance that shatters hearts the worldThis book is not a brilliant work of classic literature. It’s not a richly gorgeous high fantasy. This is not a romance that shatters hearts the world over. This isn’t even a bleak dystopian that shows a future both beautiful and terrifying.
This book is a 100% certified guilty pleasure read.
and SCREW IT ALL but I actually really enjoyed it.
Let us begin with Ye Olde Synopsis.
It’s been one hundred and seventy years since Earth became uninhabitable. One hundred and seventy years since the last remnants of Earth’s population fled the planet on a small fleet of spaceships, beginning a dazzling new life among the stars. Since living in space requires a completely new lifestyle society, the survivors built new ways of life to accommodate. Those less fortunate are crammed into the smallest, most dilapidated ships, deprived of the luxuries the richer ships enjoy. The largest spaceships are named after the glories of the old Earth: the Versailles, the Lady Liberty, the Empire, the Shanghai, the Saint Petersburg, the Scandinavian, etc, and can host hundreds of the fleet’s wealthiest inhabitants. Smaller, private ships, like the Islay and the Prinzessin Sofi, are owned and operated by a few select families. In a world where the human population is a fraction of its size on Earth, making a strategic, early match is everything. That’s why the Valg Season exists: a Bachelor-esque whirlwind of events designed to throw the most eligible children at each other’s heads. At the end of approximately five weeks, engagements are announced, and the future population of the spacebound colony is assured. However, the Season only happens every five years, so connections must be made and engagements secured with the utmost speed.
Leonie Kolburg’s family is on the cusp of both worlds; their rapid decline in fortunes forcing them to rent out their small private ship and live on the monetary goodwill of their rich cousins on the Scandinavian. Leonie’s father and younger sister insist on living lavishly, mindless of how much the family is dependent on their rich relations. The only reason her family isn’t bankrupt already is because of Leo’s frugal financial management.
But this year, the Valg season is returning, and considering this is Leonie’s last eligible season, her father is constantly pressuring her to make a wealthy match and save the family’s fortunes. But since making that match would require her to forget Elliot Wentworth, Leo isn’t exactly too eager to get engaged. Elliot was the servant boy who she fell desperately in love with three years prior. She was engaged to him for several hours, before her overbearing aunt and father bullied her into breaking off the “deeply improper” match. Put another way, he was too poor for her.
Leo believes she will never see Elliot Wentworth again, until a now rich and titled Elliot shows up during the Valg’s opening ball, and Leo realizes she’ll have to watch him fall in love with someone else right in front of her eyes.
YES FINALLY I GET TO DISCUSS MY OWN THOUGHTS do y’all know how long that summary took me to write
*laughs while sobbing very slightly*
Firstly and foremostly: the plot. The plot felt like the craziest mashup of the Bachelor, speed dating, regency traditions, black market space trading, and class divisions. Literally that was the plot. and NO ONE tell me that that Bachelor action wasn’t half the novel there is literally a gold rose on the cover.
For being a story set in future dystopian space, I didn’t really feel like the cool scifi part of the book was that great or even all that relevant. You know how there’s books in scifi settings that actually use plot points related to holograms or netscreens to move everything forward? Yeah this was not that. This was more a dramatic rich person romance that happened to be set in space. I didn’t care that it wasn’t really true scifi, but just don’t go into this thinking you’ll get cutting edge scifi action and you’ll be fine.
Speaking of the romance, I want to mention that this story is billed as a retelling of Jane Austen’s Persuasion. Now, to those non-Austen superfans among you, this is no cause for concern. The similarities are really not that obvious, and you definitely don’t need to have ever even touched a copy of Persuasion to enjoy the story.
LE CHARACTERSSS
Overall, the characters were nothing special.
WAIT NO I TAKE THAT BACK EXCEPT FOR EVGENIA. HAH THAT GIRL WAS ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS. 57% of my enjoyment of this novel came from Evgenia being sarcastic, Evgenia playing matchmaker, Evgenia tossing people into pools, the NUMBER OF TIMES THIS GIRL MADE ME CACKLE Y’ALL YOU WOULDN’T BELIEVE.
Anyways. Everyone except Evgenia was kinda bland and complained about rich people problems, which just got kinda annoying after 200 pages or so.
Leo, our intrepid heroine, was enjoyable for the most part, but she gave off a few vibes of rich-person-trying-to-help-poor-people-but-does-a-horrible-job-because-she’s-too-speshul-to-know-what-true-suffering-is. Also, her complaint that she knows pain because she has to manage her family’s finances? girl, I do that every time I walk into Barnes & Noble. Be quiet.
But besides the occasional whine, Leo really just wasn’t that bad.
Now, Elliot though. Elliot definitely wasn’t as amazing as I’d hoped he’d be. While the original character he was based on, Captain Wentworth (no, the name was definitely not changed *rolls eyes dramatically*) was literally my book boyfriend when I first read Persuasion, his modern counterpart here was just meh. Elliot acted like a jerk, he was unnecessarily passive aggressive, and I had so much trouble seeing real romantic connection with Leo.
Speaking of which, that’s another thing: the romance between Elliot and Leo was pretty much just TOLD to me. Leo told me soooo maaaaanyyyy tiiiiimeees she and Elliot are madly in love and they are just so sImiLAr. Let us look at a brief example. Elliot said something to the effect of: “Oh, we both love having our first dates reading on a cramped loveseat in the middle of winter!” Leo then thinks, “Gasp, we’re clearly soulmates!!”
…
honey, do you even know how much that doesn’t work in real life?
sooooo i’ve kinda just dissed these characters for the last three paragraphs, but in reality, the drama and the eccentricities of the plot more than made up for the most annoying parts. That’s why I said this was a total guilty pleasure read. No one watches the Bachelor because it’s deep, high-quality entertainment. But do they watch it anyways? 100% YES.
Ratings: Star Rating: ★★★☆☆ If This Book Was a Movie Rating: PG
Recommendations If You Liked This Book: The Selection by Kiera Cass Cinder by Marissa Meyer...more
the magic system gave my head physical pain. the main couple lacked any semblance of chemistry. the love was just lust on steroids. the drama felt like hthe magic system gave my head physical pain. the main couple lacked any semblance of chemistry. the love was just lust on steroids. the drama felt like high school angst. the worldbuilding made absolutely zero sense. the characters I couldn't care less about. the action was nonexistent.
even the cute wolf couldn't save it for me.
one star and i'm not wasting any more brain cells on this....more