Postcards from the Edge

Doris: Will you please tell me what is this awful thing I did to you when you were a child!

Suzanne: Okay, you want to know? Do you?

Doris: I want to know! Tell me!

Suzanne: Okay, FINE! From the time I was 9 years old, you gave me sleeping pills!

Doris: That was over-the-counter medication, and I gave it to you because you couldn't sleep!

Suzanne: Mom! You don't give children sleeping pills when they can't sleep!

Doris: They were not sleeping pills! It was store-bought and it was perfectly SAFE! Now don't blame ME for your drug-taking! I do not blame my mother for my misfortunes or for my drinking!

Suzanne: Well, you don't acknowledge that you drink. How could you possibly blame your mother for something you don't even do? Remember my 17th birthday party when you lifted your skirt up in front of all those people, including that guy, Michael?

Doris: I did not lift my skirt, it TWIRLED UP! You only remember the bad stuff, don't you? What about the big band that I got to play at that party? Do you remember that? No! You only remembered that my skirt accidentally TWIRLED UP!

Suzanne: And you weren't wearing any underwear.

Doris: Well...