Tin Men

Sam: You know when I saw 'Bonanza' the other day, something occurred to me.

Ernest Tilley: Eh?

Sam: Ya got these four guys living on the Ponderosa and ya never hear them say anything about wanting to get laid.

Ernest Tilley: Huh.

Sam: I mean ya never hear Hoss say to Little Joe, "I had such a hard-on when I woke up this morning."

Ernest Tilley: No, no, no...

Sam: They don't talk about broads - nothing. Ya never hear Little Joe say, "Hey, Hoss, I went to Virginia City and I saw a girl with the greatest ass I've ever seen in my life." They just walk around the Ponderosa: "Yes, Pa, where's Little Joe?" Nothin' about broads. I don't think I'm being too picky. But, if at least once, they talked about getting horny. I don't care if you live on the Ponderosa or right here in Baltimore, guys talk about getting laid. I'm beginning to think that show doesn't have too much realism.