Sex, Lies, and Videotape

It is a film about relationships, dilemma, courage and more. What works in life and what does not. Honesty does and (crudely speaking) at a very basic level that is the message. At the very heart are the three protagonists who are stuck. The therapist is spectacularly wrong in his interpretation to the apparently frigid wife: 'If you think about it ...you are obsessed about things you have no control over'. But she demonstrates at the end that she did have the control. All she needed was a better, more 'intimate' therapist; a catalyst : Graham ; who ends up uncluttering the cheating sister in law's mind and forces the husband to confront his problems in the process. It is a remarkably optimistic film in its content and therefore perhaps slightly unrealistic.

It is a film about masterful use of contrasts; the two women and the two men could not have been more opposite in every possible respect. In a way Graham is also a perfect contrast to the imperfect Psychoanalyst. This helps the director bring out the message clearly.

The whole film is crafted in a minimalist way, flows smoothly and does not carry much 'garbage'! Music, camera and the narrative are almost perfect in that they are almost invisible. So are the actors, especially James Spader and to a large extent Andie MacDowell. Gallegher is probably less than perfect but very good nonetheless. Laura Giacomo portrays a rather difficult character really well. It treats the audience with respect as the message is subtle and very personal, as it should be. My only grievance is the last office scene involving Gallegher was probably unnecessary.

Sex and the videotapes are incidental to the storey and perhaps misnomers therefore.

It is like reading a rather well written short storey and I would recommend 'Days And Nights In The Forest' (perhaps slightly more realistic and understated than this film) by Satyajit Ray to those who have enjoyed this film.

My rating 8/10.

Why does Graham prefer iced tea so much? He offers it to Ann when she visits him for the first time at his apartment. Does the same when Cynthia pays him a visit. When he and Ann are having their first real conversation in the restaurant there's a glass of iced tea next to him, while Ann has a glass of white wine. Besides being a probable leitmotif, it's something that, seems to me is a part of Graham's character. He comes to live in that town to get away, to find a closure to his past. He ends up providing closure to the lives of these three characters. Let's imagine a scenario sans Graham - a phase in the life of a woman whose husband is having an extra-marital affair with her sister. She's suspicious but he denies. She finds evidence to prove that he's having an affair with her sister and decides she's had it, she's leaving her husband. Do you think this might have been the conclusion of this scenario? I think not. As Ann rightly says to Graham, that she would have left her husband anyway, but the reason she's doing it now, is because of him. She thinks sex is overrated, her sister seems to believe in the opposite and here comes a man whose profession, for all practical purposes is having women talk about sex. Ann's therapist is a foil to Graham. While he dispenses his advice and listens patiently to Ann, Graham is the all important catalyst that helps her make a practical decision in her life. He also aids in her real sexual awakening. Before Graham, sex, for Ann was incidental. Now it takes on a different perspective.

One might say that in making women talk so intimately to him about sex, he sort of breaks the ice on a topic that is more or less socially tabooed. His is a presence that evokes trust in the most introverted of women, making them confide in him and by doing so have an almost cathartic experience. I think the iced tea motif of Graham's character fits in here. Beyond his trademark black-shirt, blue denim attire, it is the only other element related to him that is conspicuously stated. That's my conjecture anyway!

Needless to say, James Spader is superb as Graham. He manages to evoke many of the nuances of Graham's character by subtle, volatile facial expressions. Andie McDowell is also great as Ann. Hers is a really sensitive and touching performance. Peter Gallagher and Laura San Giacomo are both equally good. The music for this film is appropriately minimal and poignant. Great effort by Soderbergh, who I'm glad to hear has come back to his experimental film roots with his recent film 'Full Frontal'.

Sex, Lies and Videotape will probably strike the average viewer as irredeemably degenerate, maybe even perverted, since voyeurism is still considered aberrant behavior. But as far as this film is concerned, that's the appearance, not the reality. Whereas the drama revolves to a certain extent around the voyeuristic masturbation of an impotent man, the heart and soul of the film is an unrelenting, hard driving psychological siege on the biggest erogenous zone of all: the brain.

This film is about sex. But it's not about the frothy swapping of fluids and feelings. It's about honesty, without which one can't have intimacy, which is to sexual stimulation what the water valve is to the hydrant. From beginning to end, we see this theme brought into focus by the dramatic contrast between two different relationships – the one based on lies and deceit, the other based upon honesty. And guess which one wins out in the long run?

In a sense, it's what your mother and Sunday school teacher taught you all along. But what makes this movie way more interesting than your mother or Sunday school teacher is the level of honesty it suggests is necessary as the basis of a healthy relationship. Ann (Andy McDowell), for example, an acceptably moral person tells the voyeuristic masturbator `You got a problem.' He replies by adding that he has a lot of problems. But, he says, `They belong to me.'

Somehow, the openness about one's problems renders their bile and poison ineffective. `Lilies that fester,' said Shakespeare, `smell far worse than weeds.'

Steven Soderbergh's debut film is voyeuristic, intense, gripping, and intriguing. It's the story of four people. Ann is a sexually repressed woman with an obsession for cleanliness and organization. Her husband, John, is a lawyer and he is cheating on his wife with her own sister, Cynthia. Ann lives oblivious to what is going on behind her back, despite her deteriorating sex life with John. But things really start to change Graham, an old friend of John's comes in town to visit. Graham is a strange man with an odd set of ideals who also has a fetish of filming women talk about their sexual fantasies. When these personalities conflict and intertwine things start to change dramatically and the tension rises all the way through Soderbergh's ingenious script and his quiet yet intensely focused direction of some fantastic performances.

sex, lies, and videotape is a very risky film which graphically examines sex with the utmost seriousness. In this film sex isn't made into a joke like American Pie, and it isn't turned into some sadistic and grotesque motif like Se7en or Silence of the Lambs. Sex is looked at under a very dramatic and very sincere scope which treats it like any mature and significant piece of subject matter. This is what sets sex, lies, and videotape apart from so many other films of its nature. It is serious, but doesn't give the feeling that it takes itself too seriously. It has to be serious and it just wouldn't feel right for this film to not be as sincere as it is.

The conversations Soderbergh has constructed here are something that need to be serious and need to be focused in order to get the artistic point across. And it is amazing how well the script is constructed. The dialouge feels incredibly real and it knows just when to pull out all of the dramatic stops. The script doesn't feel like it needs to be profoundly eloquent at all times. It is lighthearted and casual at the appropriate times, like when Graham first arrives and he, Ann, and John all sit around the dinner table casually discussing the past, the future, and life in general. But where the real genius comes in is when we realize that despite the present conversation being casual on the surface there is that constant underlying tension which escalates throughout the entire film until it all comes into fruition at the end of the film. The script has all these intelligible nuances that are absent in most "serious" films these days; something you don't really realize is missing until you see how well it can be done in a film like sex, lies, and videotape.

Now obviously this is a very character driven story and I will admit that it is hard to build an emotional connection with any of the characters. To call them imperfect would be a grotesque understatement. The four of them are incredibly flawed people who in retrospect, aren't really good people at all. They all have serious issues that affect their lives dramatically and create situations that are inescapably awful for everyone involved. But what the film lacks in emotion it makes up for in sheer intelligence. The film is so ingeniously crafted that a strong emotional connection to the characters would only cause a distraction to the film's clever craftsmanship.

It's a common misconception that you need to feel strong sympathy for your protagonists in order for a film to be good. sex, lies, and videotape doesn't intend for you to connect with these people. We are only supposed to be fascinated and awestruck at their twisted and bizarre lives. And so to me, this film does its job and it does it well. However, you do feel a strong connection to the film itself and you do want to know what will happen to these people because of the enthralling way this story is told. The absolute beautiful intensity of the script with draw you in so strongly that you won't want to miss a second of it. There comes a point where you begin to feel you must know what happens to these people because you must know how Mr. Soderbergh intends on wrapping this intriguing drama up.

sex, lies, and videotape is well written, well directed, and well acted so its already set up to be a great film. But then you add the pure ingenuity of the way the story is told and what a profound examination of human relationships it is and it is now a fantastic film. This isn't one of those films where you pick out particular scenes that you really liked or specific moments that really wowed you. The entire film cumulatively works together as one single wow moment that you just adore. This isn't a film that you will be strongly moved by and it won't bring you to tears, but it isn't trying to. It is a clever and sincere drama that treats mature adult subject matter the way it should be treated. Not as a joke, but as a basis for ingenuity.

Spader's character was the reason I enjoyed the film so much. I could identify with him and his dilemma. It seemed he felt like a stranger in an even stranger land. Who were these humans that seem so happy in the same world he could not find happiness within? What is this life we live? More importantly, what is the point? Why bother? His great battle with existence was a philosophical one. He, like myself, felt infinite sadness over the knowledge that are no concrete answers...

The movie is also interesting because it attacks the main sexual organ, the mind. Graham while trying to distance himself from the human experience by capturing sex confessionals on videotape, perhaps unwittingly became more intimate with his "partners." Roger Ebert points out that the films' argument is that conversation is better than sex.

Personally, I think the movie is about trying to find happiness with another person. Some Modest Mouse song lyrics come to mind. "And it's hard to be a human being/ And it's harder as anything else/ and I'm lonesome when you're around/ I'm never lonesome when I'm by myself" Graham finds it hard to be a human being and live in this human world full of values that he finds strange, confusing, and most importantly unfulfilling. What do you do when your ideology and needs don't mesh in the society you live within? How does one deal with feelings of loneliness in a society that spurns him? This movie is about one man's way.

James Spader does such an excellent job as this character. In fact, great acting all around by the entire cast and excellent writing and directing by Mr. Soderbergh. Go see this movie now!