Day 4

Let go of things as separate existences and mind too vanishes.

Likewise when the thinking subject vanishes so too do the objects created by mind.

The eyes have the ability to see, the ears to hear, the nose can
smell, the tongue can taste and the body can feel hot and cold, and the
mind can perceive many things. That is the ability and way of working of
each aspect. The eyes can see, but without something to be seen, there
would not be anything the eyes could perceive. In the dark, there is
nothing to be seen, even if we try to see something. Also when there is no
sound, there is nothing we can do about hearing nothing. It is as if we had
no eyes or ears.
In space there is no air so no sound can be transported. So even
though we have ears, the ears cannot function according to their ability.
That is a subjective way of perceiving. Yet the world that can be perceived
is objective. That is why it is said here:

Likewise when the thinking subject vanishes so too do the objects created by mind.

This objective world around us disappears when we sleep at night.

That means, even while there is the ability to see, since it is not
functioning, it is as if there is no world existing which could be seen.
The ears have the ability to hear sounds, yet when we are asleep we
will only hear unusual or loud sounds. That means that they do not exist,
since they are not being used. When we sleep, the world around us is not
being given existence by being perceived.
Our seeing and the world seen are in close connection, are
depending on each other. When they are melted into one, when they are
totally perceived, then also the awareness of subject and object
disappears. That state of mind is the very base of our mind. This world is
based on dualism, the seeing and the seen. It is based on these two
aspects, that is why the subject and object can exist. If there is no
perceiver, it is just as if the objective does not exist either.
That essence of mind is our true base. If we do not keep that in our
awareness, then we hold onto ideas and opinions, thinking that this real
world should be accordingly. We are always in accord with what is around
us. The base of the universe has to be understood clearly.
I see this natural scene because I was aware of myself. Because my
eyes see, that is why the world exists. The world around exists because
we experience it. If we do not experience it we cannot say that it does
exist. Without a subject there can be no object.
And there are 6,7 billion people on this planet, and thus there are 6,7
billion combinations of subject and object. That is an important point. We
all don’t take responsibility for ourselves, because we do not see this law
at work correctly. This world exists because of my subjective experience
of it. If there is anyone who seems to be difficult, it is because there is
this difficult aspect within us, otherwise we could not perceive it. We say
the other person is bad, but because we can perceive bad, it means that it
is within us and the matter is not whether the other person is bad or not.
The other side of this is that because the world exists, that is why I
exist. The world is real, that is why the eyes can see. Of course, there are
also blind or deaf people, which only means that someone is missing a
certain tool. But the combination of subject and object does exist no
matter how the tools are. It sounds very theoretical. If we perceive this
correctly, then we have to ask, what is good and what is bad. If we are
not careful, we will misunderstand this. We will say that this world is
terrible. But it is because all can be found within us, that is why we cannot
place the responsibility on someone else, but have to see our part in it.
We say it is the responsibility of society, of somebody else. A big mistake.
We are our master and we also have to take responsibility as to how we
perceive this world.
It says in the sutras that this world is like our two feet. If one foot
falls, the other one will follow. If we say, that only we are correct then it is
a lie and we only make life difficult for ourselves. It is not true that only
we are correct, that only we are good. Sometimes somebody comes with a
holy face, but that is not how it really is. The Buddha said clearly that
there is neither a good nor a bad person. If this world is bad, all is bad. If
this world is good, all is good. It only depends on the combination of the
subject and object. We are all totally responsible. That is Buddhism, to see
everyone as the same.
If there are no doubts in our mind, then there can be no mistake in
this world. If our mind is confused, then anything we see will seem
confused. We create our own world from the subjective. That is how
simply the Buddha taught it.
Everything comes forth from the mind.
The mind is the source of everything.
The first verse of the Dhammapada. In this world everything is
based on ones own mind. It is not that I create the world, but I am
involved in it and thus it exists. The question is where the weight is, and it
can be found in the subjective. All mistakes, all problems of this world are
our responsibility. We cannot say that we don’t know about something. If
there are many thoughts in our mind, thinking about this and that then
even good thoughts make it complicated. Our expression will be filled with
this complicated energy and people around us will suffer because of this.
If one cart passes, then the cart following will get stuck in the tracks. If
we are not straight the world around us will follow in those tracks. If we
are open and wide in our mind, then also the world around us will become
like that. That is why our state of mind is the most important part. A
warm hearted mind will create this kind of atmosphere. If someone is
selfish, this will also be felt in the surroundings. Because this law is not
understood that is why so many people are confused.
We have subject and object in this world. The world exists because
of these two, dualistic. There is always, myself and other, good and bad,
win and loss, there is always a dualistic view involved. Everything is based
on this dualistic way of experiencing. But where has this subject and
object been born from? That we have to ask. We experience ourselves as
me me me, but nobody asks where the self is being born from. Because
we do not look for an answer to this question, we say that we can only
feel peace inside when that person is not around. We have to get rid of
them. We think like that but do not ask why we think like that. We are
aware that there is the subjective and the objective, but if we do not find
a solution to this problem, the outer problems have no way to be resolved
either.
This world is a mixture of subject and object, but if we dig into that
place, we experience that there is only one world. This world exists
because I am aware of it. And yet we do not ask where not our body but
our consciousness was born from. Where has this been born from? No one
asks this question, so there can also be no solution to the problems. To
look deeply into this question is the practice of zazen.
We search for the source where all this comes from. We cannot sit
zazen in some dark, unclear place where we do not hear or see. That is
not the true practice of zazen. We look at the one who sees, we look at
the one who hears, we dig into that place to find the source. Or else the
dualism will remain. In that way we search for where everything is being
born from. Using koans and Sussokan. But it is not about analyzing our
breath whether it is good or bad, but to use it to see the base where it all
comes forth from. Muuuuuuuuuuuu Muuuuuuuuuuuuu
Don’t look at the created shadow, but grasp the place where it
comes forth from. If we are not serious it is not possible to grasp it.
Everyone here is not serious enough. The train is just carrying you along
but that sharp seeing of the motion is not happening. So even though we
sit zazen, we do not become bright and clear.
This world is being born from the subjective that is experiencing the
objective. Because of our real experience of the objective do we know,
that it exists. And now we dig into that source of the awareness. Deeper
and deeper, that is the most important point of zazen. It doesn’t matter
how we sit, whether on a chair or standing or walking, but our focus has
to be on the place where everything is being brought forth from.
In that way we dig deeper, and the world and self become one, they
melt into one. If we do not dig in, and if we do not see that it is all coming
from the same source, then we are being used by our own self. That is our
responsibility. If we want to make this a peaceful and open hearted world,
then first of all we have to have a peaceful self. That is the truth of
Buddhism. While digging in, the seen and the seer melt into one, an
experience of truth.
If our subjective experience disappears, then we can also say that
the objective disappears. Our mind brings forth unnecessary thoughts and
ideas, so our eyes and ears remain dirtied by our ego. From there we see
the world. Like placing a feast onto a dirty plate. However delicious it
might be, it cannot be eaten because of the dirty plate. If we dig to the
root, all just settles right here. It is no conceptual understanding of it.
There is the book of Archery and Zen by Eugen Herriegel. Eugen
Herrigel went to Japan as an exchange teacher, and he also had a
personal wish to study the laws of Buddhism. He arrived at the Sendai
University and right away asked where he could study Buddhism. At the
university they told him, that even for Japanese it was too difficult. And
there are hardly any Roshis who speak English so even if one would try,
one cannot understand. But there are the paths in Japan. Even when
practicing flower arrangement, one will be lead to the source of the path.
Also in Kendo (sword path) and Kyudo (archery path) Shodo (calligraphy
path), no matter which path you take, the source is Zen. To study Zen is
difficult, but to practice a path, the teacher can teach you and you will
reach the source. His wife choose to do flower arrangement. Eugen
Herrigel had done some Western archery in Europe, and decided to study
Kyudo. He at once was being introduced to Awa Hanshi, a 8 degree
master of Kyudo. But he said, “I won`t teach him. He is so intellectual, it
is not possible.” - “But this person is different, he might be intellectual,
but he actually came to study Zen. So it is obvious where his true interest
is.” - “Well, in that case, I will look after him for some time.” So he
started to train under Awa Hanshi, but he had to practice for one, two
years in front of the Makiwara, a three meter distance target. He only had
to train the form and became frustrated with it. He talked to his teacher
who responded: “As long as it is you who is pulling the bow, there is no
need to stand in front of the far target. Keep practicing until your self has
disappeared.” – “But if there is not self to pull the bow, who is pulling the
bow?” – “Exactly there is the problem. If you do think you are doing it, it
is better to stop. There should be someone in there who is not you.” –
“What a strange thing, there should be someone who is not me?” Eugen
Herrigel came with intellectual explanations yet Awa Hanshi had no
interest to listen. But Eugen Herrigel continued until his third year in front
of the Makiwara. He kept practicing 200 shots a day which takes about 4-
5 hours, but then as he was pulling the bow, something in him that wasn’t
him was doing the pulling. When Awa Hanshi saw this he said: “Mmh, it is
getting riper. How about slowly starting to practice in front of the far
target?”
So after three years he was allowed to stand in front of the 28
meter target. In Western archery you have measuring tools attached to
the bow, so that you can measure in millimetre steps as to where to shoot
as to hit the target. But kyudo is different. There is only a bamboo with a
string, so one has no idea where the arrow will hit. Eugen Herrigel was
getting ready to shoot when Awa Hanshi stopped him and said: “Don’t try
to hit the target.” – “But if I were not to try to hit the target, that is not
archery, is it? That is strange.” – “Right there, just wait until you become
one with the target. Then the target will come to you and you don’t have
to try and aim. It is the target that hits the arrow. If you don’t understand
this, rather stop.”
He was allowed to stand in front of the far target, but he was being
yelled at: “Don’t aim, don’t shoot.” And even Eugen Herrigel got angry:
“What kind of weird archery is this? Just a waste of time, nothing is going
to come out of it.” - “I had heard that you wanted to study Buddhism. If
there is a division between the world that is shooting and the world that is
being shot at, then that is not Buddhism. The one aiming, the one holding
the bow, the target, the arrow all have to become one. Or else it is not
Kyudo and you will not understand Buddhism. Come tonight and I will
show you whether what I say is true or not.”
It has just gotten dark, when Eugen Herrigel went to the Kyudo hall,
and Awa Hanshi was already prepared. He lit a stick of incense and asked
Eugen Herrigel to place it right in front of the target. Then Awa Hanshi
stood in his place where he always practices, holding two arrows, which is
the formal way of shooting, and he took the first arrow and shot it into the
dark. The sound of the target being pierced could be heard. He shot the
second arrow. “Go and get the arrows,” he said to Eugen Herrigel. What a
surprise to find the second arrow stuck right in the back of the first arrow.
“You said that without aiming true archery was not possible. But how do
you explain this? This is me becoming one with the target. Trying to aim
leaves the dualism alive, wanting to hit the target destroys the balance in
body and mind and it becomes even harder to hit. Yet if you stay in center
in you body, then from there you can work on your mind becoming one
with the target and the arrows will hit naturally. The outcome can only be
the arrows hitting straight in the target. When subject and object become
one, without wanting to hit.”
“You might say, that I hit the target with the first arrow because of
the incense stick. But the second arrow could only have hit the first one
from straight behind if it flew exactly the same line. When we let go of all
dualistic views, then this world can become one.” In this way Awa Hanshi
showed him the reality of becoming one. Eugen Herrigel kept practicing
hard for 3 more years, took the third degree before he had to return to his
own country. This is how it is written in the book: Archery and Zen.
Why do we sit zazen? If we want to become something, then we will
always be caught on the appearance, on the pain in the legs, on the body
and by the end we will be too irritated to even sit. That happens because
we see ourselves dualistically. We have to look at the source, who feels
this pain, where is the source for this being? If we become unclear, it is
just an escape. We cannot see ourselves dualistically, but have to just dig
in. Not doing a good breath, onnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeee – but going to the
very end. Then we can return to the source of our consciousness. Because
we see counting the numbers out there, we are still separated from it.
Muuuuuuuuuuu cannot be found outside, but digging into it where no
dualism can come forth. Digging deeper and deeper, straight into the
subjective experience. But any gap, looking around and we are back in
dualism. We have to look at the source where all is one, forgetting the
body, the surroundings and the breathing – all melting into one. We have
to experience this over and over again, so that the smart intellect, the
dualistic view just disappears. Where nothing is left whatsoever. From
there we can understand:

The arising of other gives rise to self; giving rise to self generates others.

Know these seeming two as facets of the One Fundamental Reality. In this
 Emptiness, these two are really one— and each contains all phenomena. If not

comparing, nor attached to "refined" and "vulgar"—

you will not fall into judgment and opinion.

The world, where everything has melted into one brings forth this
world. Then everything becomes clear to us. That is what Awa Hanshi
meant by saying to become the target. Even ugly people, even difficult
people, all feelings about people melt away. And we can experience the
world in a simple and clear way intuitively. We become the target, the
target becomes us. From that state of mind, there is still a target and still
a self, yet it is a target born from the experience of oneness. There is no
need to want to aim and hit. Of course there is 80% technique involved in
archery, yet the rest depends on the state of mind.
This is how it is when using a tool, yet in the practice of Zazen we
do not have anything, just facing the world straight ahead. In Buddhism
there is no intellectual way of understanding, only each person’s
experience counts.
If in our mind we do not divide into special things and unimportant
things, then it all can melt into one. The nature doesn’t say, you are
important and you are not. There is no likes and dislikes in nature, it is
our mind that creates these. Then a mountain is high and close to us. A
river is deep and close to us. The flower is red and close to us. The willow
is green and close to us. There is nothing special, not putting any
judgement onto anything, but just accepting it the way it is. In our mind
we do not divide into good or bad anymore. The world itself has no
dualism in it. In that sense we can return to simply experiencing it the
way it is.

The Great Way is embracing and spacious— to live in it is neither easy nor difficult. Those who rely
on limited views are fearful and irresolute:
The faster they hurry, the slower they go. To have a narrow mind, and to be attached to getting
enlightenment is to lose one's centre and go astray. When one is free from attachment, all things
are as they are, and there is neither coming nor going.

That huge mind, as huge as the universe is like the Great Way that
can accept anything. That state of mind is our very base of mind. If we
can let go of dividing into like and dislike, we can experience this Great
Way in our mind and understand that this is the base of experience. The
rain falls equally on good and bad people. But sometimes it created a
flood. The sun can become too strong and cause a drought. From the
position of the human beings, the sun and the rain have dangerous
aspects, yet it is also thanks to the sun and rain that we can receive the
gift of nature. Human beings only receive these gifts while total entrusting
to nature.
 We are given this chance to do zazen and to experience this huge
energy. While saying we want peace we go out and demonstrate for
peace. When we say this, we create more suffering. All of us try to protect
their own life, where could there be terrorists coming from, where could
there be something bad coming towards us. We are all brothers and
sisters on this planet. When there is someone who has not enough to eat,
when we worry about who will attack us, there is no Great Way there.
How can we live in harmony without any fears? We have to work on this
solution. It cannot be resolved in one or two generations, and still we
have to work on it, we cannot give up on this, or else all the weak will
have to suffer even more.
Today there are too many intellectual people, there are no fools who
can straightforwardly jump into their human true nature. If there were
more people who would put their intellect aside and jump straight into the
base of their human nature, then there would be people who can use their
wisdom based on the experience of human`s source, opening many new
ways of finding solutions. Nowadays there are too few people who deeply
believe in this. We have gathered here for the sesshin so please use this
chance to return to the base one day sooner. Don’t entertain yourself with
intellectual ideas, but look straight to the source. That is the source from
where the wisdom for peace can come forth.
The base of all human beings cannot be one sided. Because we
concentrate on developing that base in ourselves, we cannot turn away
from society. We do have to purify ourselves, yet cannot only get stuck
onto that. We have to seriously dig in and yet be not attached. To help
others and not hold onto that either. To move freely in this world and also
dig in deeply. It is difficult to do both, it needs special effort. While still
having problems and doubts, to keep going, to help each other, and even
if we don’t get there right away, we keep at it with patience and without
becoming attached. Then the inside and the outside can grow
simultaneously. In Buddhism it is said to not stop at the bad. But to stop
even less at the good. That is a very high state of mind.

Day 5

We look at our death, it is our own, the bird has their way of dying,
the fish has their way of dying. Like Confucius says, the great way is not
difficult, meaning that all living beings and animals on this planet have a
Buddha nature walking their own path. We have received this life by God,
by the heavens who created our life; we can call it whatever. It is our
truth which is being expressed here. Death is a part of having been born.
Yet there is a law which stands behind and is the same for all. We have to
look at death and see things from that perspective. When we can entrust
all to death, then we do not have to worry about anything anymore. Yet
human beings are too complicated and cannot entrust to death easily. If
we knew how much longer we have to live on this planet, than we could
prepare accordingly, knowing how much money we should keep for our
rest of our life. We of course decide differently as to how much we need.
Yet even if we knew how much longer our life were, we could calculate as
to how much to keep. Yet it is not that easy. The economics might
change, our house might be blown away by a tsunami, crushed in an
earthquake. Also our health cannot be depended on. So the older we get,
we become more and more insecure about our life. When born we are
filled with total energy. Then having worked hard our life, and it the end
we are filled with worry and insecurity - how sad to have ones life end like
that. It is because we cannot entrust. So our worries just increase and we
do not entrust to our death, becoming smaller and smaller in our way of
seeing our own life.
Just entrust to the heavens. If we run out of money we might die of
hunger, we have to die anyways and if the heavens want us to live, food
will come somehow. If we are of value to anyone, they will also help to
secure our life. Yet politics nowadays can change anytime, yet if the
heavens want to protect our life, they will do so. If not, any circumstance
could be our end, and then we might as well get it over with fast. We have
to be more relaxed about whatever might come towards us.
We don’t easily become this huge and easy mind, we collect
information and our heads becomes heavier und smaller. We loose our
huge state of mind, and life becomes poorer. We really have to work on
not being attached, on how to be quieter. Then we dive in too deep and
actually a feeling of not wanting to do anything comes up, or we become
too irritated. These are two mistaken ways of practicing zazen. Then
falling into some deep hole. We are in a dark place and we just get stuck
in some seemingly quiet place.
Not to think anything is the best way. If we think too much, life
becomes too complicated. I should not think, I should not think. So we
just repeat this in our head, yet it is not in accord with our life, so
anything unbalanced throws us off right away. So after a week of sesshin
we are very exhausted, having told ourselves to not think over and over
again for a whole week. The mind becomes tired. How could we become
tired from sitting zazen?
There we turn our backs to situations in society, and we hope just
by doing that to become quiet inside, how could that be possible? In the
Hokkekyo it says: the Buddha came to this world to teach the truth yet
the people of this world are stuck to their ego, to hate and delusion and
attachments. So the Buddha used many tools to liberate the people.
There is one story about how the Buddha used different stories to
liberate people. In India at that time people lived together in big families.
The house caught fire, and the master of the house saw that the children
were playing inside, and since the children did not know about the danger
of fire, it was hard to explain to them the need to get out fast. So he told
them that there were carts pulled by cows, by sheep and by goats in front
of the house. The children ran out, happy for the new toys, and as soon as
they ran out, the house collapsed. Of course there were no carts outside,
and the master had told them a lie, yet by using this tool their life was
saved. That is how the Buddha used many stories to liberate many
people. But then a huge white cart by a huge white cow came along,
meaning the big vehicle of the Mahayana cart which pulls all people along.
The Shomonjo sutra was taught and the Buddha explained the
basics that life is suffering. Why do we suffer? Because we accumulate.
Let go of it all. And he taught the 8-fold path as to how to leave this wheel
of suffering.
Then there were students of the Buddha who realized enlightenment
by the chance of karma. In a certain moment seeing a flower, hearing a
sound, their mind was opened. Others again realized their true nature by
working in society as Bodhisattvas. These are the three main paths. And
all of them are just tools as to how to reach the true human mind. Like
the carts for the children were just tools to liberate them.
The law of human beings and the law of the universe is the same,
and to experience that is the truth. That is the only main truth of
Buddhism. We all have the wisdom of the Buddha within, and we do not
have to search for it in our heads but in our senses. We feel hot and cold,
we see and hear many things, we think many thoughts. Only there the
truth can be found.
The six sense organs, the six doors, eyes, ears, nose, mouth, body
and mind are in contact with the world. The world we see. The world we
hear. The world we taste. The world we smell. The world we feel. The
world we think about as good and bad. Through these six senses we also
bring up emotions inside, and attachment, anger and greed and delusion
come up. We have these six doors through which we experience the
world, yet at the same time it is also through experiencing the world that
these inner attachments arise. In that sense the outer world is like dust.
But if we do not get attached to it, then it can be the highest expression of
our Buddha nature through these sense organs. We can become one with
what we see, with what we hear. There no more doubts come up. By
saying that we do not hear, that we do not see and experience, there is
no way for us to have an awakening happen.
We are in this world, and if we want to experience the truth of it, we
cannot run away from it, yet we can experience this world without being
attached to it. Even the hardest thing we face straight on. To polish this
mind is the truth of the Buddha and of Buddhism. If we turn away the true
wisdom can never come forth.
Because the eyes see things that is why we can experience joy. But
this joy cannot create attachment. The world of music can give joy, which
is most beautiful, yet to hold on to it, brings forth attachment. The
Buddha experienced enlightenment by seeing the morning star. How
about if the Buddha had been blind, would he have not experienced
enlightenment? It is a matter of the mind being open, of the mind
becoming one with what is around it. Of course, the Buddha did see the
morning star, and he could experience the oneness with that star. But
neither the eyes nor the star experienced enlightenment, but it was the
mind that experienced it. The six sense organs experience this world and
it is not about negating it but to not be attached to it. There the fresh and
healthy mind can be experienced. If we hold on to our happiness and joy,
then it becomes twisted. That is not the truth of Buddhism. To totally
experience and at the same time to polish the mind that does not hold on.
That is Buddhism. To try and get rid of the ego is something impossible,
because then we cannot move at all. To want to do good in society is a
wish based on ego. But if we negate that, it would mean that we turn our
backs on society. Then it would be better to have no Buddhism. The
problem lies there where we do good and get attached to it. We have to
take that part off, and do good without holding onto what we have done.
If we do not to hold on to our good deeds, then the society would be a lot
more happy and harmonious. But someone of wisdom will not hold on.
And the one without wisdom, who cannot let go of himself, will be busy in
his mind, what to do. The one who can let go, his mind will be opened, a
hugeness in mind MAKA comes forth. That is our true mind, that doesn’t
think about anything. That doesn’t mean that there is nothing. In that we
see the pain and suffering in society, it becomes our own. Our mind can
become the moon, the flower, the rivers, the animals all are in our mind.
There is no distance between our mind and the world around. The one
seeing and the seen melt into one. That is no intellectual understanding,
but from morning to night we hold onto nothing. This pure state of mind is
our true mind. 2500 years ago the mind of the Buddha, 100 years ago the
mind of Bodhidharma - if there is no attachment, then it goes beyond all
time. But because we think about it too much, it becomes too compacted.
All flowers are a combination of atoms and that is all. In the
Diamond Sutra it says, the cherry blossom and the plum blossom all are
just equal atoms. But a human being says I prefer tulips, I prefer cherry
blossoms. There is no difference in the flowers, but the humans attach
likes and dislikes. I like Wagner, I like Mahler, I like Beethoven, I like
Bach. If you think about it, it is just vibration in the air that moves in our
ear drums. And still people experience a difference. They make divisions
here. We all don’t have to like Beethoven, but if we know the law, then we
don’t get attached. The flowers come forth from a place of no attachment.
If it becomes a matter of fights over which flower is nicer, then that is
besides the point.
As human beings we are made up of 6 million cells that came forth
from one cell. The information is in all of the cells and depending on the
DNA we all look different. The DNA is pretty much the same, just a tiny
aspect is different. Yet there are people we like and others we don’t like.
No matter how intelligent we might look and behave, it is all accumulated
information since we were born. There is nothing our own, we just think it
is and we feel hurt if someone doesn’t trust our opinion, even though it
has nothing to do with us and is just based on the accumulated
information. People collect information in different ways. That is not where
the value of human life can be found. And then we even attach like and
dislike to things, wanting to support that what we like and destroy what
we dislike.
That is how society is nowadays, because the base of mind is not
understood. So we even start wars based on dislikes, we attach bombs to
our body and even blow ourselves up. We all are just a combination of
atoms, and we do look like human beings, but whatever we attach to it is
what we become. The good becomes good, the bad even worse. Even the
greatest person is just a collection of information, and a criminal didn’t
have the chance to collect the correct information. From there alone the
wisdom comes forth to solve the problems. 2500 years ago, the laws of
how the mind works were taught clearly.
This is the main point of these verses. If we have dualistic views,
our mind becomes more and more irritated. Of course, because our mind
is not settled, that is why thoughts come forth. It is a bad cycle. And the
thoughts again bring forth new thoughts. Our mind always has dualistic
ideas, yet that is the point where our dualistic view has to be cut, because
it is the source of the mind`s irritation. That is what On Believing in Mind
is teaching us. This means that we have to become MUSHIN empty in
mind. There is nothing we can hold onto. The water just flows along, and
it doesn’t rot. But water that stays still turns bad. Just like the mind.
When it starts to hold on, it doesn’t move and turns bad. Today there are
so many lawyers; everything has to be brought to court. As if this society
is made so the lawyers can become rich. If we were simpler in mind, there
would be no need to bring all small problems to court.
We see the world dualistically. It is a dualistic world. But in our mind
we take this dualistic mind to see the dualistic world. Already the world is
dualistic, and if we then try to see it from our dualistic view, it really
becomes complicated. Dualism becomes the main point. Japanese written
characters are very interesting. A cross of a road means to understand. It
is like being at a crossing, we know whether we go left or right. But if
there is again another cross on top of it, it is read as confusion. If there
are too many roads to choose from, which one shall we take, which one is
the diagonal one we were supposed to take? If there are many paths,
then we loose our base. Good and bad, loos and gain, and in the end all
ends up in a court where we want to win.
One wealthy person had a court case of inheritance. He was a doctor
and had a lot of money; he even got a price with a lot of money. The
children wanted some money, knowing that the parents still have plenty.
So they went to court. And the mother got sick of it. “I don’t want one
cent. Have it all”, and she left. She knew that from the origin there is not
one thing. “If I have enough to eat today, that is plenty for me.” And she
threw it all away, not wanting to be in this struggle for nothing. She saved
her human heart.
In this world all are just empty expressions, like a phantom, like a
mirage glimmering in front of the sun heat. It is just an apparition from
the heat on the stones. That is how this life is, up and down, we have and
loose again. Like it says in the diamond sutra: all is like …..

In this world all things are like a dream, like a phantom, like a
bubble in a stream. Like a shadow, like the drop on a leaf before the sun
comes up, like the lightening in a dark sky, lighting up for a moment. See
this true base of human mind, that all has no true existence. Win and loss,
all are dreams. Even if we win or loose, all are just apparitions. Even the
greatest jewels, the greatest riches, are just flickering in the light. Sorrow
and joy, all are dreams. There is no need to hold on. Even though we
want to hold on, it will only be while we are alive. At the last moment we
will have to let go for sure. Please see clearly that all is just a dream, and
then you can hold on, because you know that it is just borrowed to you.
And then you feel free to return it anytime. Just like this body. In Ikkyus
death poem he wrote: Today and now I return this body which had been
lend to me.
Win and loss, praise and criticism, frustration and happiness is just
the scenery of a moment. You cannot hold on. There is nothing that can
be held onto, that we can say it is truly our own. So it also says in the
bible. The books will be filled with stains, even if we keep them in an iron
box, which will then rust and rot away. And they can be stolen. So do not
accumulate riches, they will all fall away. And even our life and our body
don’t turn into that what we want it to be. And knowing this we still
continue, I like that person and not the other person. There are more
important matters to look at. This world which is changing and constantly
dying in parts. What do you get by simply holding on to appearances?
Life is a dream. The Roshi was asked during tea time, what kind of
dreams he has, and he said that he doesn’t see any dreams. It says that
saints don’t see dreams. He doesn’t think that this is true. One only sees
dreams in a state of sleep close to waking. It is not that he doesn`t have
any dreams, but if one lives a healthy way of life, these dreams are no
obstruction. It doesn’t mean one shouldn’t have any dreams. But humans
are seemingly awake in a world that is a dream. This world seems to
exist, and we become attached to it, but it is just a dream.
Hideyoshi was a child of a poor farmer and he became the highest
samurai. When he was dying he said: “Thinking about it, life was a dream,
even though I got to the highest, even that was just a dream.” If you look
at it neutrally, we are just a combination of atoms that gather and
combine and fall apart again. Buddhism sees this clearly and in every
moment enjoys the dreams, but if it is not seen as a dream, then we
become thrown off by these different dreams.
All see the appearances and know that this is not the true base.
Then all ten thousand things can be seen coming from one. All flowers,
trees, mountains, river, and people we like and those we dislike, beautiful
and ugly people, all are just the same.
At my place there was an American student, who married and had a
house right in front of the monastery. They both had a child, and the
name Clay was given. Now he should be 16 or 17 years old. He was so
cute. The father of the woman was Russel Schweikhard, who was on
Apollo 9, the one flight before the moon landing. They couldn’t land
themselves since they didn’t have enough fuel and they just had enough
to finish their projects. They had to refill one outside tank which was there
for the next flight coming. Russel Schweikhard came many times to
Sogenji not to do zazen but to see his grandson. He gave many talks
around the world, and he also said in his book, there is only one world.
And on this one world, there are so many fights and wars, 6,7 million
people have no other place to go. And the land of the Buddha, Mohamed,
all these we pass in 5 minutes in a spaceshuttle. Humans cannot live
anyplace but on this planet. And still they have likes and dislikes, and say
only their way of living is true. He experienced this deeply and wanted
people to know. He travels around the world and tells about his
experience. We are all one human being. He did not only see it from
above, but he realized that it was the true human mind. If we let go of our
likes, then there are no more gaps, no more divisions between people. If
we see from our true base, that wisdom comes forth.
We and all living things on this planet, just like glass and diamond
seem the same to a child, only adults attach worth to it. To see it all as
equal is a deep seeing. That is our true mind. We have it all in us, and still
we hold onto things we have gathered since we were born and we even
think that we are right. Our true mind cannot be judged or given any
value. Just like when we were born, there was no worth attached to
anything. Only now we want things to be in a certain way, but even
anything special has to be seen from the eye that sees it all as equal. A
rich man and a poor man are the same person; a murderer and a saint
are the same – that is a high state of mind, which is our true base of
mind. From a high state of mind this can be seen. From there all is seen
and nothing seems special.
If we treat all the same, but then we cannot educate, and if a
murderer is the same as a saint, how can we exist? There has to be a
court case for this murderer. The politics, the moral values of society see
it like this. Religion sees it differently.
In the monastery in Kobe where the Roshi trained, there was the
monk Bankei Zenji 300 years ago, and hundreds of monks gathered to
train under him. There was a monk among them who would steal. The
possessions of the other monks and also of the monastery kept
disappearing. They figured out who it was. The responsible monk went to
Bankei Zenji and said: “Please throw this person out.” He only said: “oh
really?” He didn’t even talk about throwing him out. The responsible said,
“We have to ask him again since no one feels safe to train here.” Bankei
Zenji said, “Do I really have to throw him out?” – “Yes, we cannot train
like that.” - “So all of you leave. If I throw him out, he will not change, he
will not have that chance to train in some other monastery. So all of you,
who are so excellent, leave and he can stay.” Why did we all come here in
the first place. They didn’t know what to do. The monk who had been
stealing heard about this, and he realized what he had done and how his
master wanted to support him. And he awoke to the truth and never stole
again. Today there is hardly anyone seeing like this, but if we start to
judge, there is no end. If we distrust others, we cannot feel safe
anywhere. Humans want to be safe and yet they create an unsafe world.
We have to look deeply and see this within our mind. In this way
Sansokanchi Zenji is teaching us.
Day 6

People like to criticize each other and talking about others is like a snack
with a cup of tea. If you get too used to it, you will do this your whole life
long. To discus others and criticize them, you loose your own Buddha
nature, said the 6th Patriarch. To correct someone is different to gossiping
about him. We exchange many information, things of the past and future,
that is the content of our talks. This person is great now, but they used to
be terrible in the past, and thus we keep remembering the past. In that
way we destroy the eye that sees all as one and the same. Stop pulling
out past happenings and feel good about doing that. It is such a waste of
time. Our mind is only here and now, there is no need to judge someone
from their past as to how they are now. It is important to see him right
here and now. He might have learned from the past and changed, that is
what matters and not what they were like in the past.
Nangaku Ejo Zenji asked: Who came there? It took him 8 years to
find the answers: the one who cannot be described in words has come.
That is very much to the point since the person is living right now. Not
analyzing the parts, the form, the superficial layers - that makes us loose
our own deep mind. There is no past experience, no good or bad on that
level where all are the same, before anything came forth. Before this
world was created and thought of, there is our true base. How can we
express it?
When we move it is one appearance. When we stop it is another
appearance. We should not think to try and stop our mind, that again is
an appearance. I should not think, my mind should not move, is just an
appearance. Moving and stopping is just the other side of the coin. A car
is moving, and when you turn off the engine, then it stops as a real fact.
But if you start the engine, then it can run again. There is either
movement or stopping, both are just borrowed expression, just an
appearance. And our mind moves here and there, thinking it has to stop
the thoughts, yet all these dualistic views are a mistake. Moving and
stopping, being and not being, this dualistic world has these two aspects
to it. Both are appearances, yet they cannot exist at the same time. There
cannot be stopping while moving, neither moving while stopping. The
other always ceases so that the next can come forth. We see it all as
dualistic. And we attach ideas to how things are. The car is just moving,
the car is just stopping. It seems that they don’t happen at the same
time, and what we talk about is just an appearance that is changing. The
car doesn’t change, only the appearance of it. In the same way when we
think about the future it is far away from the truth and reality. Dualism
only exists in the mind, win and loss, having and not having. This is only
how it is understood from the mind. But how would it be if moving and
stopping become one? It means that there is nothing. From the beginning
there was nothing. If the dualism of stopping and moving disappears, then
there is nothing at all. The mind is not quiet during zazen – this is just an
appearances within our mind. Holding onto nothing we cannot say it is
good or bad zazen.
 The great way is not difficult. The path on which all people can walk
together, used to be seen as received by God. The good go to heaven, the
bad to hell. During many years humans have brought forth moralistic
views. Do good, don’t do bad. If you do bad, the mind will not be quiet. If
you do good, your mind will be at peace and quiet. In trhis way moral
ideas have been created. But what are true moral values? During war it is
preferred to kill more people, during peace this is a murder and will be
punished. What can be seen as true moral ideas, when they keep
changing? What should be taken as important? What is totally bad, what
is totally good, what is absolutely correct, what is absolutely wrong? There
are no train tracks that can say this is absolutely correct. All is in motion
and changing. So Confucius says what is a path is not a path. It is not the
path of this world, but the path of the heavens, including all galaxies, so
huge. From the universe nothing is separated. The path which exists is not
a path. There is the moon, the sun, the earth, mars and venus, they have
a form and we give them names. This planet earth was born 2 billion
years ago, and it still exists, but one day it will start to fall apart. This
galaxy also will disintegrate. Where then will be the sun and moon? Within
the universe there is nothing that can be given a name. Morality changes
with the times said Confucius. People learn many things during different
eras. Something new might be more practical and the moral ideas change.
We should take care of our parents, of our wife and husband, of our
brothers and sisters. It is not a fixed rule, but it might change in different
times. Even high moral values of the past might change nowadays. Like a
kimono, there are threats straight and vertical. The long ones don’t
change yet the ones moving form side to side change and give a pattern
to the fabric. That is how things change and adjust. The true moral
values, what are they? This is not to be understood on some intellectual
base, like some law made by the government.
We look deeply within and see from there. Not taking our own
happiness as the first and most important, if we want to take care of all
the people on this planet, how can we solve the problem of hunger, of
nature`s pollution, how can we solve all the problems of this time? So
that all 6.7 million people on this planet can survive and be happy. We
have to experience our own true human nature as to understand that we
are all one and connected. It cannot just be decide in our heads.
All people were pure in mind when they were born. We don’t push
someone aside so that we can breathe better when we are born. At 16
months of age we understand one. At 23 months we understand two.
After 23 months we understand that we are a separate being and we start
to protect our being. From there we start to judge others in order to
receive what we want. The one is the world of God, where rain falls on
good and bad. The mind before that one is zero, where we were born
from. That human mind is still in us, we have become too intellectual,
thinking that it might work better like this or like that, and in the end we
make it all more complicated. Our heads become so complicated and more
and more detailed laws are being made. When we are pure and simple in
mind there is no need to any laws.
 The fox Reineke is well know in Germany. Going over ice, he will
smell and hear the water, making sure the water is really frozen. He will
check the road left and right before crossing it. It is a tool to survive and
protect his life, but human beings have become too much like this. It
makes the connections between people not trustable. If we all had this
pure mind from our birth, we are able to let go of all the accumulated
ideas. If we cannot trust and believe in this, what can we believe in? If we
really believe in this, then we don’t have to see other humans as the
greatest enemy. We have to work on returning to this pure trust in each
other. If not, what can we believe in?
In this world everything is in constant change. The world is never
the same, the news are different each day. We never know what will
happen next. We see it moving and changing, what is important there, the
past or the future, what shall we rely on? NOW and HERE. The day today
is the most important. The greatest news form yesterday don’t help us
much today. And we don’t know what will come tomorrow. Today we can
find our straight forward life energy. That is the truth of the human
beings. Or shall we keep playing with our thoughts about something that
hasen`t even occurred yet?
Basho, the famous poet, was staying in Osaka in the Hanayona
Ryokan. People gathered around Basho since he wasn`t looking good and
asked him to write down his last poem. He was suffering deeply and he
said: “The poem of today is fake tomorrow. The poem from yesterday is
fake today. There is not one poem that I wrote that wasn’t mine. All my
mind and heart were used trying to express the truth of the moment in
the poems. If I die now, the poems of the past are not true, are not the
real thing. Yet I have not made one poem that is not true.” He had been
doing zazen: An old lake, a frog jumps in. That was his enlightenment
poem. Every day living with full strength and life energy.
The path of tea, the path of flowers - all have zen included in them.
One cup of tea takes less than one minute to drink, but to make it we
clean the garden, prepare the room, wonder what the guests of today
would like as a scroll, what we should prepare as food, so that all six
sense organs become stimulated to drink one cup of tea. It might take
many days to prepare for this one single cup of tea. We make efforts in
the preparation of it. There the eternal life in each moment can be
experienced. The same as in flower arrangement. The flowers don`t last
more that a day. Like the flowers in the zendo should be changed every
day, a simple fresh flower each day. That is our life energy. Changing
each moment, and then dying. In each moment we see the life energy. In
each breath we can find the Buddha nature. The flowers might last 3 days,
the cup of tea 30 seconds, yet we try to experience Buddha in one single
breath. There is nothing as sharp as zazen.
If there is no shadow left in our mind, that is the true experience of
heaven. This state of mind filled with total life energy, that is the highest
joy. We are all not ripe in our zazen. He can see the emotions and
attachment in our face. “Our father goes to zazen and we don’t know what
he thinks.” - “Our mother comes home from zazen and we don’t know
what is up.” That is how they should say it. There should be nothing in our
mind that can be read, so that no one can see through us. There is
nothing left, because we looked deeply within. In our mind there is a
depth where the waves of joy and sorrow don’t reach. If we are filled with
joy, we become high and jump around. And pain makes us heavy and
sorrow. That is superficial. It is simple to say that we are happy when we
are happy, and sad when we are sad. But to not see the unmoved depth
in our mind is sad. There is a place that doesn’t get moved by any of this.
If we don’t experience this, it is not zen.
All ideas of society cannot see the depth of the human mind. That
deep mind within the human beings, to awaken to it is the path of zazen
and yet we still seem so far away from it.
The state of mind of a Buddha, there is no I or you. If there are no
dualistic ideas, it might seem like a bulldozer drover in some dark place.,
but that is not how it is. While there is dualism, we don’t get attached to it.
Just like that huge state of mind which is like the depth of the ocean, no
matter what gets thrown into it, nothing leaves any trace. That deep state
of mind exists in everyone.
There was a Ho Koji at Baso Zenji`s place, who asked a question,
“Who sees this world?” 6,7 million people, mountains, stars… all is being
seen outside, but who sees it, where is he immovable? That is what Zen is
experiencing, that is what we are looking for. No matter what happens
that we can be immoveable within ourselves. We experience it in Zazen.
Baso Zenji answered: “As soon as you have drunk up all the waters from
the ocean, then I shall tell you.” Our zazen has to be of this quality.
Where this world gets drunk down no matter what happens. Whatever
comes up, all good and bad, win and loss, understand and not
understanding, all is drunk down and no traces are left at all. The sixth
patriarch said: “Outside don’t hold onto good or bad, and inside don’t
attach to anything. That is the practice of zen.” This world does have a
dualistic base, yet we cannot escape and say that we don’t see and hear,
there are good and bad people, healthy and sick, rich and poor people.
But rather while seeing it we do not judge and criticize it. While we look at
it, we reflect it like a mirror. There is no need to judge or add anything.
How can there be a person that doesn`t judge? How can a person like
that life in this world?
We don’t take responsibility for the generations after us. We get sick
before dying and become unsettled. We sit to awaken to our state of mind
that swallows everything - no good nor bad, that is zazen. Inside we see
clearly and don’t hold onto anything. We don’t know how deep our mind
is. Science doesn`t know how huge the universe is, one day they might
now, yet the depth of the mind can never be known. Because it can drink
in anything, even one`s own death.
While all of us have this huge state of mind, we still keep adding win
and loss. That huge master and state of mind can be awakened to where
all is drunk down. Not only the water of the Rhine river, not only the water
of the oceans, but also the whole universe. That is not just an idea. One
might say don’t talk so abstractly, but if you haven’t experienced it for
yourself you don’t know that it can be really experienced.
We can enter this state of mind. Our huge state of mind will not hold
onto anything. Just here and now - that is one thought moment which is
the eternal truth. The scenery in front of us is there only while we are
alive. 30 million years ago the human being was born from one cell, where
are all these people now? Where do we go when we die? We have to see
this clearly if not we just sit with a good feeling while we are alive.
Straight in front of our eyes, wherever we have to go, we have to accept it
clearly or else we become confused when we are close to death.
This universe is a collection of atoms. All living beings are a
combination of atoms. Good and bad, awful and good, are just an
appearance, that is made up of atoms. They are not small nor huge.
Atoms have energy around them with, like a small sun inside with planets
around. We cannot see it with our simple eyes, yet it shows us the lay out
of the universe. It is all the same. Atoms are the smallest seen from our
eyes, but in our mind when we do not attach to the form of things, there
is no big or small. All is the same and just simply is. The universe seems
huge when compared to an atom. But in our mind there is no division, just
how it is. Mount Blanc is not huge compared to a small stones, since we
just see it as it is. The huge mountain Mt Blanc enters our eyes in the
same way as a small rock. As appearance they are the same.
Everything has to be seen as absolute; that is the truth of our mind.
To attach any small and big is just a judgement of our mind. That is a
mistake as to how the things really are. Mu is U and U is Mu. There is no
absolute rule, it just seems to exist. Also everyone here it is just a
combination of cells. There are many cells dying each moment, within
seven years all cells in a body are renewed. A new person we meet since
the cells are all renewed, just the memory of the person stays. All cells
will change and disappear. It seem like the flower blooms each year, but it
is new each year in the same way as the person seeing it is new each
year. No intellectual explanations needed here. Just see and hear it
straightforwardly.
Like it says in the heart sutra: Form is emptiness and emptiness is
form. While it exists it doesn’t exist. It exist because we are aware of it. If
we are not aware of it, we cannot say that it exists. Like our inner organs.
The heart, liver, kidneys - there are many organs which we are not aware
of. If we are aware of them, then we are sick. That doesn’t mean that
they are not there, yet we are not aware of them. Form is emptiness and
emptiness is form. That is how we can see the world and it doesn’t need
much explanation. Big and small, not holding onto that, onto good and
bad, onto win and loss, not holding onto anything, all is just MU. All is just
the way it is. The good is also bad while we think it is good. Winning
might be loosing. And loosing might be winning. If we understand this, we
don’t have to hold onto the things in a small way. Dying and living is an
appearance, and we take it for so important. If we know that it is just an
appearance, even our death will be just the way it is. No need to hold onto
anything – that is a mistake. Nothing needs to be protected.
 Like the diamond screen ins Taishaku`s room. A diamond is
connected to the next one; so many they cannot be counted, yet they
reflect the next diamond and the next one reflects the next one. And they
are all part of one screen. 6,7 million human beings on this planet and
many more animals exist like this diamond screen, reflecting each other.
The Buddha asked Anan Sonja, “Where is more earth, on this planet or on
this finger nail?” - “There is only a tiny bit of earth of this finger nail
compared to the earth on this planet.” – “That is how precious and rare it
is to attain a human birth.” There seem to be so many human beings and
so many more animals on this planet. It says that if the birds do not eat
insects for one week, the green on this planet will disappear. The birds are
so many hundred thousands more, and they eat so many more insects,
that is how the green is protected. There are whales and smaller tiny
fishes in this ocean water. The whale drinks 500000 planktons in one gulp.
All of these are included when counting all the living beings on this planet.
Human beings are not special; they are all equal and reflect each
other in the diamond screen. Humans have wisdom and they need to use
it to protect this planet. Humans want to survive but if they are not
careful, this planet will be destroyed. We have to work in society, and we
sit in the zendo; the cook makes food, the farmer made the vegetables,
the pots were made by workers in society. The sun and the rain, all are
there to support my life. They give me life. To ignore that is that good? I
need to return the support I have received.
If we understand this then we know that this path is not difficult.
Talking about the awakening to our true nature. If we awaken to it and let
go of intellectual ideas, good and bad, then we can awaken to our human
nature, which connects us to all. If we awaken, then all will awaken and
we can liberate all. That is the huge way which is not difficult. If we
awaken to this true nature, then what should be difficult? It is our
intellectual understanding that makes things difficult. We have to trust in
the quality which lies before the intellect comes in.
We are one, one is all of us. We are not separated from this world.
All humans of this planet live within us. The hope and joy of all human
kind is within us. To awaken to it is our true zazen. That understanding of
our deep mind is believing in mind. Nothing outside that we believe in, but
the place where I and the world are one, while there is I and the world.
That joy and happiness can be experienced when believing in mind. Why
do almost all wars on this planet depend on religions? Digging into each
religion we can find that true and clear base, which is the same in all of
them. Religions came forth depending on the area, in deserts and in
mountains, the teaching was different as the moral values were different
in each place.
Yet to say that the moral values from one area should be used for all
doesn’t make sense. We say that if our religion is being believed in, then it
is correct and if not that it is the devil`s work. From there confusion
comes forth. To believe even just a little is what can guide humans to
peace in this world nowadays. It is not just for now, but 2500 years ago
the Buddha realized the truth, which already existed before. It is a true
law, no matter who will experience it. This universe is the expression of
believing. Humans base is to be found in the same spot. 45 people sit in
on the zendo and return to the same mind. We have to pray for
everyone`s enlightenment. If not, then our enlightenment cannot be
called true enlightenment and include all. In this way Sansokanchi Zenji
has been guiding us with his text On Believing in Mind.