Volume 1, Issue 1 September 2009
OAsis Newsletter
Tulsa Green Country Overeaters Anonymous
Step 9: Made direct amends to such people
For an honest, balanced view of myself, I take a few moments in which I free my mind of everything except Gods love for me.
For Today (p. 153)
wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
OA Melts Ice
I spent this past weekend with my 14year-old daughter. Im a divorced father and havent lived with my daughter for five years. The first year after the divorce I made many mistakes as a parent yelling, comparing and having a girlfriend from hell. I hurt my daughter, and by years end she put up a wall to protect herself from me. I hit bottom later that year and joined OA shortly thereafter. For the last four years, I have worked the OA program and moved through the Steps. Early in OA I continued to make mistakes with my daughter, such as commenting on her food choices. Other OA members suggested I talk only about myself. OA taught me that this is a program of attraction and that I was taking care of her by taking care of myself. I turned my will and life over to Gods care.
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changes and had large resentments toward me. I spent most of my time being with my son. I was getting better in OA, and my son told my daughter about the wonderful times he spent with dad. While talking to her by phone the last several months, I detected a softening of her voice. Feeling the time was right, I reached out to her and we began spending time together. She sensed the changes in me, and the walls started tumbling. My daughter is now in my life again. This past weekend I did my Ninth Step amends to her. We were both emotional, and she was so moved she started to cry. When I finished, she said she loved me and we hugged. She said it was the best thing that happened to her that week, one of the worst weeks of her life. A friend of hers had cut her wrists, and she found another friend drinking to the point of toxic shock. She talked openly Continued on page 4
Inside this issue:
Twelfth Step Within Day
Abstinence Definition Amended
I saw my daughter infrequently for the next three years as she went through
Fall Retreat
Twelve StepsPrinciples Learned
Newcomers Welcome!
Overeaters Anonymous offers a program of recovery from compulsive eating using the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of OA. Worldwide meetings and other tools provide a fellowship of experience, strength and hope where members respect one anothers anonymity. OA charges no dues or fees; it is self-supporting through member contributions. Unlike other organizations, OA is not just about weight loss, gain or maintenance; or obesity or diets. It addresses physical, emotional and spiritual well-being. It is not a religious organization and does not promote any particular diet. If you want to stop your compulsive eating, welcome to Overeaters Anonymous.
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OAsis Newsletter
I got here (desperate, eating compulsively) by doing things on my own. I stay here (abstaining) by fostering relationships with my Higher Power and OA members. Voices of Recovery (p. 97)
December 12 designated Twelfth-Step-Within Day
Celebrated on December 12 (12/12) each year to encourage OA service boards, meetings and individual members to reach out to those within the Fellowship who are still suffering from compulsive eating behaviors. Send the World Service Organization (WSO) your ideas for activities and events to celebrate Twelfth-Step-Within Day. WSO will post them in upcoming issues of A Step Ahead and Lifeline.
http://www.oa.org/contact.php
I cant; God can; I think Ill let God. The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous (p. 19)
Next Intergroup Meeting Sat. September 19, 2009 - 9:45 a.m. at OA Office
Volume 1, Issue 1
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Abstinence Definition Amended
WSBC Policy 1988b (amended 2002, 2009) defines abstinence and recovery as follows: Abstinence in Overeaters Anonymous is the action of refraining from compulsive eating and compulsive food behaviors. Spiritual, emotional and physical recovery is the result of living the Overeaters Anonymous Twelve-Step program.
Every time I pick up the phone to call my sponsor or an OA friend, each time I take up my pen to write, I move myself along the path of freedom, awareness, acceptance, love, and recovery. Voices of Recovery (P. 91)
Fall Retreat, Sept. 11-13
Join Inspector E. Z. Peasy in the Town of Perfection and hopefully take some of the mystery out of your program Fall Retreat at Camp Wa-Sha-She September 11-13, 2009 Download flyer, registration form and more information at: http://www.tulsaoa.org/current_events.html $100Must pay in full by Sept. 9 (No registrations or payments will be accepted at the retreat.)
The OA program, the people and God are all there for me, loving me fat or thin, abstinent or compulsively overeating. Can I do any less for myself? For Today (p. 226)
Relapse is not contagious, but recovery is. Twelfth-StepWithin Handbook (p. 5)
Tulsa Green Country Overeaters Anonymous
2009 IG Board/Committees Priscilla L., Chair ................................. 402-8183 Linda T., Recording Secretary ............ 625-5094 Amelia A., Treasurer ........................... 344-5039 Evelyn, Office Manager ...................... 406-4783 Priscilla L., Rep. Delegate .................. 402-8183 Amelia A., Rep. Delegate ................... 344-5039 Sally D., Alt. Delegate ......................... 430-8922 Karen B., Web ..................................... 492-7606 Kim W., Tape Library .......................... 742-3816 Stephanie F., Young People ............... 809-0707 Pat A., Pop........................................... 250-1981 Kelly D., Lifeline .................................. 902-1170 Judi P. Public Information .................. 728-3186 Donna H., Oasis newsletter................ 628-0381 VACANCIES: Vice Chair Fundraising 12 Step Within Professional Outreach
12 StepsPrinciples Learned
Step One Honesty Step Two Hope Step Three Faith Step Four & Five Courage Step Six Willingness Step Seven Humility Step Eight & Nine Self-discipline Step Ten Perseverance Step Eleven Spiritual Awareness Step Twelve Service
Were on the Web! www.tulsaoa.org
OA Melts Ice continued from page 1
about whether she should have called 911 instead of staying with her friends and nursing them back to health. She would not have opened up to me about these events had I not broken the ice with my amends. I can sense that she is starting to trust me again. Thats not all that happened because of the amends. Just before that weekend, my company offered me an important job in California. I live in New York and my daughter lives in New Jersey. I had thought about changing jobs and moving closer to my kids in New Jersey. In OA, Ive learned that my self-worth is not defined by my job. My behaviors and actions define who I am. The choice was not great job opportunity versus relationship with daughter, but was as a father, balancing my relationship with both kids versus receiving more money to give them better educational choices when they are college-bound. Because my Higher Power placed the job offer so close in time to my Ninth-Step amends to my daughter, the spiritual road he wanted me to follow became clear. God showed me that my relationship with my daughter is the greater of the two fatherly needs. The Big Book says we will be amazed before we are halfway through (our Step Nine amends) and the promises will start coming true. Before making amends to my daughter, I did not feel changed by the process. Thats no longer true. I dont know a specific promise that covers this story. Perhaps it is that self seeking will slip away, or we will intuitively know how to handle situations that once baffled us. I can say for sure that God is doing for me what I have never been able to do for myself.
Anonymous (Excerpt from Lifeline, September 2004)
In Step Two, we learn hope as we come to believe that a power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity. The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous (p. 104)
