0% found this document useful (0 votes)
12 views12 pages

Day 27

ielts

Uploaded by

linhtp12.gec
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
0% found this document useful (0 votes)
12 views12 pages

Day 27

ielts

Uploaded by

linhtp12.gec
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
You are on page 1/ 12

Some people think that a good diet and exercise are not necessary for a healthy and

long life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

No. Nam Essay


e

Dan Outline:
g Writer’s opinion: disagree
Tran Body 1: Reason 1: the advantage of a good diet and exercise
g 5.5 Point 1: decrease the rate of catch the diseases
Point 2: boost the mental health
Body 2: Reason 2: the drawback without a good diet and exercise
Point 1: lack of necessary nutritious
Point 2: laziness

Essay:

Nowadays, some arguments assume that a balanced diet and active


lifestyle are not adequate to have a healthy and long life. In my opinion,
I totally disagree with this statement due to the essential benefits of healthy
lifestyles.

To begin with, the advantages of balanced diet and an energetic lifestyle


are absolutely undoubted and they can efficiently improve our well-being.
If keeping these healthy habits daily, the physical health can reach a peak
state. Thanks to contributing the sufficient substances for the body
combined with exercise, they help people not only burn their calories
and reduce cholesterol levels that are the fundamental reasons causing
many healthy problems such as obesity and cardiovascular disease; but
also, prevent people from contracting incurable diseases like cancer,
rheumatism and flu epidemic. Additionally, people following a balanced
and energetic lifestyle are typically the kind of peopleperson who
profoundly love themselves so they always have numerous ways to rescue
themselves from sadness or even depression; that is the reason why they
have a better mental state than normal others.

Following the previous point, there are some shortcomings for people who
have a disordered lifestyle to emphasize the importance of maintaining a
healthy diet and doing exercise. Due to not eating a balanced diet, people
can lack natural substances like protein, carbohydrates, minerals and
vitamins; especially children can vulnerably catch malnutrition and weakly
make their immune systems. Moreover, lazily doing exercise can make
people’s bodies weaken, they become less suffer harsh conditions and
easily construct diseases like flu epidemic, obesity and arthritis.
In conclusion, I personally acknowledge that maintaining a balanced diet
and an energetic lifestyle isare completely essential for a healthy and long
life. If people do not make an effort to follow these good habits, they can
weakenedweaken and sickly.
Good job on your essay! Please consider these suggestions for
improvement:

● Replace "assume that a balanced diet and active lifestyle are not
adequate to have a healthy and long life" with "claim that a balanced
diet and active lifestyle alone are insufficient for achieving a healthy
and long life" for more precise phrasing.
● Modify "the advantages of balanced diet and an energetic lifestyle
are absolutely undoubted" to "the benefits of a balanced diet and an
active lifestyle are indisputable" for conciseness.
● Change "they help people not only burn their calories and reduce
cholesterol levels that are the fundamental reasons causing many
healthy problems such as obesity and cardiovascular disease; but
also, prevent people from contracting incurable diseases like cancer,
rheumatism and flu epidemic" to "they help people burn calories,
reduce cholesterol—key contributors to health issues such as obesity
and cardiovascular disease—and lower the risk of serious illnesses
like cancer, rheumatism, and flu" for clarity and grammatical
accuracy..
● Change "they become less suffer harsh conditions and easily
construct diseases like flu epidemic, obesity and arthritis" to "they
become less resilient to harsh conditions and more prone to illnesses
such as the flu, obesity, and arthritis" for grammatical accuracy.

Ngọc Some individuals believe that a nutritious diet and regular physical
Anh activity are not essential for achieving good health and longevity. From
my viewpoint, I generally disagree with that view and I will give my
explanations in the essay below.
Body 1: Disagree 1
- Idea 1: A good diet + exercise on a regular basis help maintain
weight and prevent diseases
- Explain 1: Eating a balanced diet can provide enough caloríe for the
body, exercise regularly helps burn excess energy. When the amount
of the calories consumed is balance with the amount of excess
energy, the body may maintain a stable weight, avoiding being
overweight or obese
- Example 1: If a person eats over 2,000 calories in a day, and does
not exercise, the excess calories can be converted into stored fat,
leading to weight gain and becoming fatter.
Body 2: Disagree 2
- Idea 2: Enhancing mental health
- Explain 2: Exercise releases endorphins, a hormone that can create
a feeling of happiness and reduce stress and anxiety. A positive
mental health also contributes to entire health and help maintain
healthy lifestyle habits long-term
- Example 2: Some types of exercise such as jogging, running,
swimming can reduce working stress. After each practice, a person
can feel better and more comfortable, helping people to cope better
with work pressure.

=> Full essay: Writing Pasal - Trương Ngọc Anh

Mỹ *Outline:
An 5 Writer’s opinion: disagree
- Body 1: A balanced diet make a contribution to physical and mental
enhancement
- Explain 1: Our bodies need nutritions to grow
- For example: protein: eggs, meat, and milk; vitamins in fruits and
vegetables
- Explain 2: If people consume too much fat, foods contained
chemicals => health problems => shorten our life expectancy
- Body 2: We need to frequently exercise to improve health
- Explain: Exercising can help to release the amount of calories that
we eat from food. If we don’t exercise => this energy is stored in our
bodies => obesity, high cholesterols in blood => avoiding dangerous
diseases: stroke, cancer
*Essay:
Many people believe that having a healthy diet and doing everyday
exercises for well-being and long life expectancy is no longer crucial. I
wholeheartedly disagree with this viewpoint, and this essay will present
the potential reasons leading to my opinion.
To commence with, following a balanced diet is considered an
indispensable driver that improves human health and promotes
longevity. Our bodies require numerous types of nutrition to grow. For
example, people need protein, which is a substance found in meat, eggs,
and milk, to have strong muscles and generate energy; calcium for
maintaining strong bones. In addition, although fast food is a dire
necessity for working-occupied humans, which do not require much
time to cook, it severely harms our health due to its fatty abundance.
Hence, if people consume these processed foods frequently, it may
contribute to fatal diseases, such as high cholesterol in the blood, obesity,
and cardiovascular diseases.
Furthermore, exercising is always as pivotal as having a good diet as
it allows our bodies to engage in the metabolism efficiently. In the
contemporary world, people tend to lead sedentary lifestyles because of
work and study requirements, which can substantially damage our
health. Our bodies need energetic activities for blood circulation and
energy expenditure after meals. Without it, absorbed nutrients will be
consistently stored in our bodies, increasing the risk of dangerous diseases
and accelerating aging. Moreover, exercising can reduce stress, and
anxiety, and boost energy levels, contributing to our well-being and
ensuring our lifetime.
In conclusion, I believe that following a nutritious diet and exercising is an
indispensable part of enhancing our life quality, both physically and
mentally, and helping humans lengthen age in many ways.

Good job on your essay! Please consider these suggestions for


improvement:

● Replace "for well-being and long life expectancy is no longer


crucial" with "for maintaining well-being and longevity is no
longer essential" for grammatical accuracy and smoother
phrasing.
● Modify "this essay will present the potential reasons leading to
my opinion" to "this essay will outline the reasons for my
stance" for conciseness.
● Change "following a balanced diet is considered an
indispensable driver that improves human health and promotes
longevity" to "maintaining a balanced diet is essential for
improving health and promoting longevity" for a more natural
flow.
● Replace "protein, which is a substance found in meat, eggs, and
milk, to have strong muscles and generate energy; calcium for
maintaining strong bones" with "protein, found in foods like
meat, eggs, and milk, to build strong muscles and produce
energy, and calcium to maintain healthy bones" for improved
clarity and structure.
● Modify "fast food is a dire necessity for working-occupied
humans, which do not require much time to cook" to "fast food
is often a convenient choice for busy individuals due to its quick
preparation" for more natural phrasing.
● Replace "it severely harms our health due to its fatty
abundance" with "it can severely harm health due to its high fat
content" for accuracy.
● Change "Hence, if people consume these processed foods
frequently, it may contribute to fatal diseases" to "Frequent
consumption of these processed foods may lead to severe health
conditions" for smoother phrasing.
● Modify "exercising is always as pivotal as having a good diet as
it allows our bodies to engage in the metabolism efficiently" to
"exercise is as crucial as a balanced diet for maintaining
efficient metabolism" for conciseness.
● Replace "people tend to lead sedentary lifestyles because of
work and study requirements, which can substantially damage
our health" with "many people lead sedentary lifestyles due to
work and study commitments, which can harm their health" for
smoother phrasing.
● Change "absorbed nutrients will be consistently stored in our
bodies" to "nutrients will be stored as fat in the body" for
clarity and conciseness.
● Modify "Moreover, exercising can reduce stress, and anxiety,
and boost energy levels" to "Moreover, regular exercise can
reduce stress and anxiety while boosting energy levels" for
grammatical accuracy.
● Replace "helping humans lengthen age in many ways" with
"contributing to increased life expectancy" for smoother
phrasing.

PLin 6 Outline:
h - Intro: Disagree
- Body 1: a balanced diet is essential for maintaining health and
longevity
- Sp1: Nutrient foods provide vitamin + minerals > boost
immune system + prevent chronic díeases
- Sp2: maintain a healthy weight > reduces the risk of
diabetes, heart diseases, cancer.
- Body 2: Regular physical activity
- Reduces stress + anxiety > exercises releases endorphins >
better quality rest and recovery
- Promotes longevity + independence

Essay:
Many people believe that a healthy diet and regular exercise are
dispensable for a long and fulfilling life is a dangerous misconception. I
disagree with the opinion and this essay will explore the critical role of
diet and exercise in promoting longevity and overall well-being.

Firstly, a good diet provides the essential nutrients our bodies require to
function optimally. A diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and
lean protein strengthens the immune system, reduces the risk of
chronic diseases such as heart disease, diabetes, and certain cancers,
and promotes overall vitality. Conversely, a diet high in processed foods,
sugary drinks, and saturated fats can lead to weight gain, inflammation, and
an increased susceptibility to illness. These negative consequences of
unhealthy eating habits can significantly shorten lifespan and diminish
quality of life.

Furthermore, regular exercise plays a vital role in maintaining physical


fitness and mental well-being. Engaging in moderate-intensity exercise
for at least 150 minutes per week or vigorous-intensity exercise for at
least 75 minutes per week has been proven to improve cardiovascular
health, strengthen bones and muscles, boost energy levels, and reduce
stress. Moreover, exercise has been shown to have a positive impact on
mental health, reducing symptoms of anxiety and depression. The benefits
of regular physical activity extend far beyond physical health,
contributing to a more fulfilling and enjoyable life. For instance, older
adults who engage in regular physical activity tend to experience fewer
mobility issues and maintain independence as they age.

In conclusion, a balanced diet and regular exercise are essential components


of a healthy lifestyle, supporting longevity and reducing the risk of chronic
illness.

Good job on your essay! Please consider these suggestions for


improvement:

● Replace "a healthy diet and regular exercise are dispensable for a
long and fulfilling life is a dangerous misconception" with "the
belief that a healthy diet and regular exercise are dispensable for a
long and fulfilling life is a dangerous misconception" to improve
grammatical accuracy and clarity.
● Modify "I disagree with the opinion and this essay will explore the
critical role of diet and exercise in promoting longevity and overall
well-being" to "I disagree with this view and will outline the crucial
role of diet and exercise in promoting longevity and well-being" for
conciseness and smoother flow.
● Change "A diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean
protein strengthens the immune system" to "A diet abundant in
fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins helps bolster the
immune system" for varied word choice and better readability.
● Replace "reduces the risk of chronic diseases such as heart disease,
diabetes, and certain cancers" with "and lowers the risk of chronic
conditions, including heart disease, diabetes, and certain types of
cancer" for smoother phrasing.
● Modify "These negative consequences of unhealthy eating habits
can significantly shorten lifespan and diminish quality of life" to
"These harmful effects of poor dietary choices can reduce life
expectancy and impair quality of life" for a more precise and concise
expression.
● Change "Engaging in moderate-intensity exercise for at least 150
minutes per week or vigorous-intensity exercise for at least 75
minutes per week" to "Engaging in at least 150 minutes of
moderate-intensity or 75 minutes of vigorous-intensity exercise
weekly" for brevity.
● Replace "boost energy levels, and reduce stress" with "increase
energy levels and alleviate stress" for varied vocabulary.
● Modify "The benefits of regular physical activity extend far beyond
physical health, contributing to a more fulfilling and enjoyable life"
to "Regular physical activity offers benefits that extend beyond
physical health, enhancing overall life satisfaction" for improved
flow.
● Change "tend to experience fewer mobility issues and maintain
independence as they age" to "are less likely to face mobility
challenges and can maintain their independence longer" for clarity
and impact.
Lại Outline:
Tran 1. Introduction the topic: Some people believe that it is not
g necessary to have a suitable diet and exercise routine for a
healthy and long life.
- Disagree with this opinion
2. Body 1: A balanced diet plays a crucial role in prolonging
human life.
- Point: Fast food does not supply the essential nutrients needed for
a healthy body.
- It has also been proven that healthy eating not only reduces a
significant amount of sick population but also increases life
expectations.
- For example, Vitamins protect the body from any kind of infection
during the Covid pandemic all were prescribed from vitamins.
3. Body 2: increasing physical activity levels can maintain body
functions accurately
- Point: Regular physical activity, such as walking and running,
helps maintain fitness, manage weight, and prevent obesity-related
illnesses.
- People who engage in regular exercise are less likely to suffer from
diseases and have a longer life expectancy compared to those with a
sedentary lifestyle.
4. Conclusion
* Essay:
It is sometimes believed that individuals who want to have a healthy and
long life do not need suitable eating plans and work out. I generally disagree
with them as I believe that both of these are crucial for a better life.

Kha Outline:
nh Introduction: disagree
Huy Body 1: a good diet can help humans prevent being overweight and fat.
en - With a balanced diet, an individual can keep his/ her weight
5.5 significantly stable as he or she will control and plan what to eat for
a day, a week, and even a month.
- Manage the percentage of calories that they consume for a day.
Body 2: doing exercises frequently lets people stay healthy.
- Burning fatty in the blood => decreases the potential to get health
problems such as stroke or heart attacks.
- Guarantee that the body is still working efficiently, and delay the
aging process.
Conclusion:

Paragraph:

A balanced diet and frequent exercise are not essential for staying
healthy and achieving longevity. I oppose this statement, and this essay
will elaborate on my ideas.
First, having a good diet is an effective way to stay strong; people should
implement and maintain it regularly. When an individual starts to eat
healthily, he or she needs to create a plan to decide what he or she will
eat for each meal and ensure that it contains all the vital nutrients.
Therefore, a person can control his or her weight, provide adequate
nourishment for the body, and prevent health risks. This guarantees that
an individual may have a robust body with a strong immune system.

Going along with the ideal diet, frequent exercise is recommended by many
medical experts as it enhances a healthy mind and body. When people are
involved in physical activities like playing badminton and jogging, they
will burn calories excessed calories in their bodies, eliminate fat in their
blood, increase muscle strength, and boost the body's defense system. In
addition, individuals can improve their mental health by playing sports. For
instance, doing yoga lets participants simultaneously reduce stress, and
achieve peace of mind while practicing it; on the other hand, they can
expand their relationship networking and connection with others in the
class. As a result, individuals will be healthier and live longer.

To summarize, humans should combine having nutritious meals and


exercising regularly to own a healthy body and extend their lifespan.

Good job on your essay! Please consider these suggestions for


improvement:

● Replace "A balanced diet and frequent exercise are not essential for
staying healthy and achieving longevity" with "Some people believe
that a balanced diet and frequent exercise are not crucial for
maintaining health and achieving longevity" to clarify the
introduction and match the opposing viewpoint.
● Modify "I oppose this statement, and this essay will elaborate on my
ideas" to "I strongly disagree with this statement and will explain
my reasons below" for a more formal and impactful tone.
● Change "people should implement and maintain it regularly" to
"individuals should adopt and sustain it consistently" for a more
sophisticated vocabulary.
● Replace "he or she needs to create a plan to decide what he or she
will eat for each meal" with "they need to plan their meals carefully"
to streamline the sentence and avoid repetition.
● Modify "provide adequate nourishment for the body, and prevent
health risks" to "ensure proper nourishment and mitigate health
risks" for conciseness and improved flow.
● Replace "When people are involved in physical activities like
playing badminton and jogging, they will burn calories excessed
calories in their bodies" with "Engaging in physical activities such
as badminton or jogging helps burn excess calories" to correct
redundancy.
● Change "eliminate fat in their blood" to "reduce blood fat levels" for
a more accurate and scientific phrasing.
● Modify "achieve peace of mind while practicing it; on the other
hand, they can expand their relationship networking and connection
with others in the class" to "achieve peace of mind and also expand
their social connections" for smoother flow.
● Replace "To summarize, humans should combine having nutritious
meals and exercising regularly to own a healthy body and extend
lifespan" with "In conclusion, maintaining a nutritious diet and
engaging in regular exercise are crucial for achieving optimal health
and a longer lifespan" for a more formal and polished summary.

Tha 𝑺𝒐 𝒎𝒆 𝒑𝒆 𝒐 𝒑𝒍 𝒆 𝒕 𝒉𝒊 𝒏𝒌 𝒕 𝒉𝒂 𝒕 𝒂 𝒈𝒐 𝒐 𝒅 𝒅𝒊 𝒆 𝒕 𝒂 𝒏𝒅 𝒆 𝒙 𝒆 𝒓 𝒄 𝒊 𝒔 𝒆 𝒂 𝒓 𝒆 𝒏𝒐 𝒕
oPh 𝒏𝒆 𝒄 𝒆 𝒔 𝒔 𝒂 𝒓 𝒚 𝒇 𝒐 𝒓 𝒂 𝒉𝒆 𝒂 𝒍 𝒕 𝒉𝒚 𝒂 𝒏𝒅 𝒍 𝒐 𝒏𝒈 𝒍 𝒊 𝒇 𝒆 . 𝑻𝒐 𝒘𝒉𝒂 𝒕 𝒆 𝒙 𝒕 𝒆 𝒏𝒕
uong 𝒅𝒐 𝒚 𝒐 𝒖 𝒂 𝒈𝒓 𝒆 𝒆 𝒐 𝒓 𝒅𝒊 𝒔 𝒂 𝒈𝒓 𝒆 𝒆 ?
Outline:
Writer’s Opinion: disagree
- Body1: How a good diet effect on health
Point: Balanced diet - improve resistance - prevent disease
Explain: Balanced diet - provide full of necessary nutrients
which body need to prevent from virus - improve resistance -
long healthy life
Example: A diet must be balanced between fat, protein,
minerals, vitamins, and grain
- Body2: Exercise everyday to maintain and improve health
Point: Exercise usually - body works better
Explain: Exercise - body works better - respiration, blood
circulation, and endurance develop better than people of the
same age
Example: My grandparents - exercise everyday - can walk a
long distance at the age of 95
Introduction: Nowadays, along with the development of human beings, the
development of different kinds of transportation and food is also becoming more
and more abundant, which is the opportunity for disease to be promoted. Many
ways to improve health

Chi Body 1:
5.5 - Main idea: help build up strength from inside
- Example: doing exercises helps release dopamine hormone which
helps increase happiness and release stress → result in healthy life

Body 2:
- Main idea: other methods have adverse effects (having supplements,
massage, etc)
- Example:
- spa/massage: be dependent → cannot go to spa during
pandemic → interruption
- supplement: have many adverse effects. for instance, vitamin C is
good for skin, but absorb too much can cause stomach ache
→ full

In this fast-paced life, fast foods and a sedentary lifestyle have become trends all
around the world. Although some individuals support that proper nutrition and
physical activities are not essential for wellness and achieving a long life, I
strongly disagree with them as I believe that both of these are crucial for a better
life.

On the one hand, healthy diets and regular exercises are essential for optimal
health and well-being. A balanced diet rich in vegetables and lean protein
strengthens the immune system and reduces the risk of severe diseases such as
cancer, stroke, etc while unhealthy eating habits can lead to obesity, and increased
susceptibility to illness. Also, regular physical activity such as aerobics, and
weight lifting can strengthen bones and muscles, boost energy levels, reduce
stress, and positively impact mental health which certainly leads to a long
healthy life.

On the other hand, most alternative methods to maintain a healthy long life
have adverse effects in various ways. For example, some people now tend to
absorb numerous supplements such as vitamin C with expectations of having
brighter skin, but overusing it would directly lead to stomachache. Another
instance is the dependence of people who choose going to spas as an effective way
to enhance their health. COVID pandemic interrupted their routines, and all
they could do was staying at home for months without any maintenance of
health.

In conclusion, while some people are not supportive of dieting or exercising, I


strongly believe that adopting a balanced lifestyle which incorporates healthy
eating habits and regular physical activity will significantly enhance the overall
well-being and increase chances of living a long and fulfilling life for everyone.

Good job on your essay! Please consider these suggestions for improvement:

● Replace "support that proper nutrition and physical activities are not
essential for wellness and achieving a long life" with "argue that proper
nutrition and physical activity are not vital for maintaining wellness and
achieving longevity" to improve clarity and conciseness.
● Modify "both of these are crucial for a better life" to "both are
indispensable for a healthy and fulfilling life" for a more formal tone.
● Change "healthy diets and regular exercises" to "a healthy diet and regular
exercise" for grammatical consistency.
● Replace "vegetables and lean protein strengthens the immune system" with
"nutrient-rich foods like vegetables and lean protein help strengthen the
immune system" to enhance specificity.
● Modify "reduce stress, and positively impact mental health which certainly
leads to a long healthy life" to "reduce stress, and improve mental health,
all of which contribute to a longer, healthier life" for better flow.
● Change "alternative methods to maintain a healthy long life have adverse
effects in various ways" to "relying on alternative methods for maintaining
health can have unintended adverse effects" for more precision.
● Replace "COVID pandemic interrupted their routines, and all they could
do was staying at home for months without any maintenance of health"
with "The COVID-19 pandemic disrupted their routines, leaving them
unable to maintain their health for months" for improved grammar and
fluency.
● Modify "adopting a balanced lifestyle which incorporates healthy eating
habits and regular physical activity" to "embracing a balanced lifestyle that
includes healthy eating and regular exercise" for conciseness.

Diu Some people think that a good diet and exercise are not necessary for a
5 healthy and long life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
- Outline: Disagree
+ Body 1: Diet
Idea: A balanced diet is fundamental to maintaining good health and
preventing various diseases. -> provide essential nutrients, energy for the
body -> increase the ability of resistance virus -> have a strong health.
Ex: A diet rich in fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins -> boost the immune
system, prevent disease.
+ Body 2: Exercise
Idea: Exercise is important for both physical and mental health -> improve
cardiovascular health, reduce stress -> tend to live longer, healthier lives.
- Full essay:
It is argued that some individuals believe that maintaining a healthy diet
and engaging in regular physical activities are not essential for achieving
good health and living a long life. I completely disagree with this idea and
my reasons will be given below.

Firstly, a balanced diet is fundamental to maintaining good health and


preventing various diseases. It provides essential nutrients such as vitamins,
minerals, and proteins for the body to provide enough energy for
humans, as well as increase the ability of virus resistance. For instance,
a diet rich in fruits, vegetables helps strengthen the immune system and
lower risk of cardiovascular diseases. In contrast, those who have poor
nutrition such as the consumption of fast foods or processed foods can
result in obesity, diabetes, and high blood pressure. Therefore, a good
diet contributes to the prevention of diseases and longevity.

Another point to consider is that exercise is crucial for both physical and
mental benefits. Doing physical activities regularly improves
cardiovascular health, and helps maintain a healthy weight.
Furthermore, exercise has a positive impact on mental health by releasing
feel-good hormones, as a result of boosting mood, aid with mental illness
such as stress and anxiety. It is cleared that people who participate in
regular physical activities tend to live longer, healthier lives.

In conclusion, I totally disagree that a good diet and regular physical


activities are not necessary. We need to combine both elements to have a
healthy and long life.

Good job on your essay! Please consider these suggestions for


improvement:

● Replace "It is argued that some individuals believe" with "Some


individuals argue" for conciseness.
● Change "engaging in regular physical activities are not essential" to
"engaging in regular physical activity is not essential" to fix subject-
verb agreement.
● Modify "for the body to provide enough energy for humans, as well
as increase the ability of virus resistance" to "to supply energy and
enhance the body’s resistance to viruses" for smoother phrasing.
● Replace "fruits, vegetables helps strengthen" with "fruits and
vegetables helps strengthen" for parallel structure.
● Change "poor nutrition such as the consumption of fast foods or
processed foods" to "poor nutrition, such as consuming fast food or
processed food" for clarity and grammatical accuracy.
● Replace "can result in obesity, diabetes, and high blood pressure"
with "may lead to obesity, diabetes, and high blood pressure" for a
more formal tone.
● Modify "Doing physical activities regularly improves cardiovascular
health, and helps maintain a healthy weight" to "Engaging in regular
physical activity improves cardiovascular health and helps maintain
a healthy weight" for consistency.
● Change "aid with mental illness such as stress and anxiety" to "help
manage mental illnesses such as stress and anxiety" for better
phrasing.
● Replace "It is cleared that people" with "It is evident that people" for
improved accuracy.

You might also like