Journal of Namibian Studies, 33 (2023): 4878-4903 ISSN: 2197-5523 (online)

When Freedom Is Regained: The

Life Experiences Of Persons Deprived Of
Liberty After Incarceration

1Dolores R. Bersamina, 2Aurora R. Quero

bersa2k3@gmail.com1
aurora.quero@unp.edu.ph2
1
Officer-in-Charge, Office of the Dean, Open University;
Faculty, Criminology Program, College of Criminal Justice
Education, University of Northern Philippines.
2
Assistant Dean, College of Social Work; Faculty, Social Work
Program, Open University, University of Northern Philippines.

Abstract
The study focuses on the experiences of Persons Deprived of
Liberty (PDLs) after regaining their freedom. The transition to life
outside prison can be challenging, potentially leading to
reintegration or disintegration. Researchers used transcendental
phenomenology to extract vital information from 10 PDLs,
identifying significant themes to better understand their
situations. The idea of living outside the jail can bring mixed
feelings, with excitement and hope but also uncertainty and worry.
PDLs struggled to fulfill their obligations to their families and faced
social disapproval and the temptation to end their lives as a form
of escape. Despite these challenges, their connection and faith in
God prevailed, and they realized the importance of becoming a
better person for reintegration. The PDLs' vision is to provide for
their families and sacrifice their own happiness for a selfless life
disposition. The vision of young PDLs living a happy life with loved
ones, spouses, or marriage is equally important.

Keywords: Freedom, Regained, Persons Deprived of Liberty,

Transcendental Phenomenology, Reintegration

1. Introduction
“Life is full of uncertainties," goes the adage. To live a meaningful life
means living every day without the intention of harming oneself and
others. According to social scientists, the fate of every living being is
to adjust to the expectancies of the social world. These expectancies
guiding one's behavior and actions are in the form of norms, laws, or
standards of conduct or behavior. Sociologically speaking, society has
norms of conduct. Against these norms, one's actions are judged or

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evaluated as conforming, disobeying, or deviating. A conforming

action is seen as that which is in keeping with the approved societal
norms. A deviating action, on one hand, violates the prescribed
standards of conduct. The Penal Reform International (2021)
reported that there are 11 million people in prison globally.
Approximately, there was a rise of about 8% over the last ten years.
This trend resulted in prisons operating above capacity in 119
countries, including the Philippines. The rising number of prison
occupants, otherwise known as Persons Deprived of Liberty (PDLs),
paved the way for crafting measures not only to reduce the prison
population but more so for the rehabilitation or reformation of prison
inmates. Since the start of the pandemic, over a million prisoners
have reportedly been released worldwide. The largest-scale releases,
according to Penal Reform International, have been reported in
Turkey (more than 114,000 prisoners), Iran (104,000), the Philippines
(82,000), India (68,000), Iraq (62,000), and Ethiopia (40,000). France
and Norway reportedly released more than 15 percent of their prison
populations. Jordan released 30%. Releases also occurred in the
United States, but prison populations did not decrease significantly,
although COVID-19 cases were at times 5.5 times higher in prisons
than in the general population. In Canada, prisoners were freed
across the country during the first wave, mainly from provincial jails,
including the release of 2,300 prisoners in Ontario by April 2020. In
the Philippines, 81,888 inmates were released from March 17 to
October 16, 2020 (Khaliq, 2020).

The Revised Penal Code of the Philippines clearly contains provisions

on the different crimes or offenses with corresponding punishment.
From a legal point of view, any action construed as a violation of the
laws of the land is thus considered a crime. As Navarro et al. (2023)
mentioned, criminal activity can be resorted to in times of strong
emotions like wrath, rage, vengeance, and the like.

A person who is proven guilty of a crime automatically becomes a

"person deprived of liberty." Deprivation of liberty simply means
taking someone's freedom away (Montanha et al., 2022). Persons
deprived of liberty are confined in a jail, whether undergoing
preventive imprisonment or serving sentence by reason of a final
judgement of conviction, which is not under the authority of the
Bureau of Corrections (BUCOR) and the Parole and Probation
Administration (PCIJ, 2021). This shows that pretrial detention and
punishment are the two most common reasons for liberty
deprivation (UNODC, 2019).

Regardless of the reason for incarceration, a person deprived of

liberty faces many challenges, like difficulties in adjusting to prison

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life, the feeling of powerlessness, and adherence to unwritten laws,

among others (UN, 2022).

The length of time of incarceration depends on the corresponding

penalty promulgated in a court decision. To protect the rights of the
PDLs, the Asian Human Rights Commission drafted a list of prisoner’s
rights. This was done in consideration that while their liberty is
desired somewhere, the PDLs are still citizens who are entitled to the
same basic rights enjoyed by the rest of the citizenry in a free society.
PDLs, therefore, have the right to be free from abuse and against
deprivation of their basic needs (Cahapay, (2020).

In the Philippines, just like in other countries, the welfare of the PDLs
becomes a primordial concern. The BUCOR was created as an agency
under the Department of Justice that is charged with the custody and
rehabilitation of national offenders (OfficialGazette, 2013).
Safekeeping and instituting reformation programs for national
inmates sentenced to more than three years become the main
mandate of the BUCOR (BUCOR, 2019).

Accordingly, there are available outlets or measures a Person

Deprived of Liberty can regain freedom. One is through probation.
According to Presidential Decree No. 968 or the Probation Law of
1976, probation is a disposition under which a defendant, after
conviction and sentence, is released subject to conditions imposed by
the court and to the supervision of a probation officer where the
sentence does not exceed an imprisonment of six years (The Lawphil
Project, 2023). The second is through parole. According to the Parole
and Probation Administration, parole is the conditional release of a
prisoner from the correctional institution after serving the minimum
period of the prison sentence. Thirdly is through complete service of
sentence.

Just recently, President Marcos ordered the DOJ to release PDLs who
are qualified for parole to ease up the country’s correctional facilities
(Flores, 2023). The Department of the Interior and Local Government
Secretary Benjamin “Benhur” Abalos Jr. announced the release of
more than 103,000 PDLs in 2022. (DILG, 2022). In the same manner,
at least 28 persons were released from detention in Leyte in time for
the 2023 New Year celebration. According to Lt. Col. Joselito Villas,
the provincial Jail Warden, those released passed the criteria as
reviewed by the Leyte management, screening, and evaluation
committee (Meniano, 2022).

Life inside the jail is much different from life outside. Countless
possibilities can happen in the life of a former PDL. In the encounter
of one of the researchers with a former PDL before this study, he

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revealed that "staying inside is a better option than going back to my

family." He mentioned that he no longer feels that his family wants
him. His wife had another family, so he had no choice but to accept
that he had to live a life separate from them. He further said that
people outside the prison have become judgmental. "The prison is my
home; I feel safe here. They looked at us as criminals. Life inside the
prison is better.” As cited in the article of Cabusao (2022), such is also
true for the experience of "Pamela" that her release brought her
anxiety. "My first thought was, where will I go? What will happen to
me? Jail turned out to be a secure environment for me. There were
rules, routines, and it was a safe place that allowed me to thrive; I did
not have to hide who I was and what I had done to be accepted and
cared for. I came to expect to be here for the long term,” she said. To
her, the prison is the safest place she can ever have. On the contrary,
some claim that there is no place like home. To them, life inside the
jail or prison is full of misery.

Given the above discussions, the researchers became interested in

conducting a qualitative study on "The Life Experiences of the Persons
Deprived of Liberty after Incarceration." The result of this study can
be used as a basis for advancing plausible recommendations by
concerned agencies in strengthening existing assistance programs for
PDLs to become worthwhile or productive members of society. It can
be used as input to improve existing rehabilitation programs in the
psycho-spiritual preparation for the eventual release of PDLs.
Similarly, findings can also be used by the DSWD to include in their
clientele system released PDL as beneficiaries of their programs and
services. Finally, the results can also be used by the UNP extension
office in strategic ways to uplift the socio-economic condition of the
PDLs and, at the same time, educate the men and women in the
community in matters relating to the importance of developing sound
moral judgment which is vital to a peaceful and happy life.

Research Objectives

The researchers had acquaintances who happened to be released

PDLs. One claimed he was just a victim of circumstances, while the
other admitted guilt. Both revealed turning points in their lives, the
hardships, the sleepless nights, and the mental turmoil they
experienced inside and outside of prison. The researchers wanted to
explore the experiences of released PDLs in terms of their thoughts
and feelings about their struggle to reintegration into their families
and the community.

Literature Review

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The researchers reviewed related literature in their desire for better

direction in the process of conducting this investigation.

According to a recent study that attempted to explore the lived

experiences of former PDLs, it was discovered that their reintegration
after their incarceration is a process. It showed, among others, that
the most common lived experiences of the participants were
expressed through feelings of anxiety, sensitivity, trust issue, seeking
fair treatment, job opportunity, and their life learnings (Reamico,
2022).

The above findings highlight a former PDL's struggle after

incarceration. The feelings of anxiety and sensitivity are the natural
emotional by-products of the perception of uncertainty. This can be
so because once released; the former PDL has to go through life
assuming all the responsibilities for himself and his loved ones. Added
to this is the additional challenge of regaining the trust of others.
Seeking fair treatment, to be treated with dignity, also becomes a
difficult struggle. Still another is financial security. As Ahmed & Lang
(2017) claimed, the lack of employment opportunities is the biggest
problem among ex-PDLs. Leaving jail has proven more challenging
because PDLs remain prisoners of the social stigma that stops them
from living everyday life.

Universally defined, a stigma is a set of negative and unfair beliefs

that a society or group of people have about something (Alvarado
Parkway Institute, 2020).

According to Erving Goftman, a Canadian sociologist, stigma

describes the situation of the individual who is disqualified from full
social acceptance (Fitzpatrick, 2008). Erving theory of social stigma
explains how an individual who is stigmatized receives undesirable or
unfavorable treatment from others.

In the same direction, in his labelling theory, Becker asserted that in

certain acts labelled as crimes, majority create the perception that
criminals are forever deviant. The negative effect of labelling on the
released PDL makes reintegration somewhat difficult. Negative labels
can adversely affect the PDL’s mental attitude, which can influence
his quality of life after incarceration (Skaggs, 2016).

In the experience of Francisco Santiago Jr., as featured on the news,

who was known as the Philippine Drug War's Lazarus, the tricycle
driver detained in Manila on Sept 13, 2016, and released later
disclosed that finding a job is hard. This shows that former PDL like
Santiago suffered discrimination (Regencia, 2016).

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Pino et al. (2021), in their study on Life after Prison, wanted to

describe the significant life experiences of former PDLs after being
released from prison. The experience of happiness after being
reunited with their families was noted. Going back as a member of
the community, however, was quite challenging for them. The
participants reported feelings of not being entirely accepted or
trusted in the community where they reside, with the exemption of
their family.

It becomes evident that the community has trust issues relating to a

former PDL. The only entity that can give full acceptance and
understanding is the family of the PDL.

From the foregoing, the researchers can postulate that while released
PDLs suffer from societal discrimination, there is still hope for their
full reintegration.

2. Methodology

The life experiences of PDLs after incarceration were investigated in

this study using a qualitative-descriptive phenomenological research
design. As cited by Gorospe (2018), phenomenology is a philosophical
approach to the study of experience. Due to the fact that it revealed
the PDLs' personal experiences, this design is the most suitable for
the investigation. In this setting, the phenomenological approach's
goal is to shed light on the particulars and uncover phenomena from
the perspective of the research's main informants (Alipoyo, 2022).
Transcendental phenomenology is a sort of qualitative research that
enables the researcher to concentrate on participants' real
experiences, as stated by Neubauer (2018) and described by
Moustakas (1994).

The participants in this study were ten former persons deprived of

liberty or PDLs. They were selected based on the number of years
they were released from jail or prison within five years up to the time
of the study. Incidentally, it was later discovered by the researchers
that 7 participants were released for having completed their
sentence, two on probation and one on parole.

This study employed the purposive sampling technique. As used by

Agup and Agup (2021), Purposive sampling is a widely-used technique
in qualitative research for identifying and selecting information-rich
cases for the most effective use of limited resources. It involves
identifying and selecting individuals especially knowledgeable about
or experienced with a phenomenon (Cresswell & Clark, 2011).

In order to gather the needed data, this study made use of the
interview method. An interview is a qualitative research method that

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asks questions to collect research data. Interviews usually involve two

or more people, one of whom is the interviewer asking a series of
questions, and the other is the interviewee who supplies or provides
answers to the questions raised or asked.

In this study, the researchers took turns in interviewing the

participants. An interview guide was used, and probing questions
were also asked to validate and dig deeper into the unique or lived
experiences of the participants.

In gathering the data needed, the researchers first asked or requested

permission from the Office of the Provincial Governor for the conduct
of the study with the participation of 10 former PDLs. The researchers
were later referred to the office of the Provincial Warden of Ilocos Sur
Provincial Jail as the latter has the records of released PDLs in the
province of Ilocos Sur. Thus, a list of former PDLs was provided to the
researchers.

Upon approval of the request, the researchers correspondingly

informed the University President's office and requested permission
to collect or gather data. When permission was granted, the
researchers decided on purpose to consider released PDLs in nearby
places like Vigan City and Sto. Domingo. Guided by the list provided
by the Office of the Provincial Jail Warden, the researchers on foot
visited the prospective participants in their homes after a courtesy
call at the office of the Punong Barangay. The researchers were
delighted that they did not encounter any difficulty in getting the
consent of the participants. After the objectives or purpose of the
study were explained, they gladly and willingly responded to all the
questions in the interview.

In order for the researchers to acquire a thorough and factual

understanding of the expressed lived experiences of the participants,
they went through an objective and careful analysis of the data. The
researchers, aware of the possible bias in the interpretation of data,
did all they could to prevent their personal biases, prejudgment, or
preconceived notions from coming in the way by strictly following the
data analysis framework espoused by Moustakas (1994). Firstly, in
horizonalization, significant statements were made parallel to each
other, while at the same time, overlapping or repetitive statements
were removed. Second was clustering the horizons whereby
significant themes were identified. Writing the textural description
came third. Here, the researchers used the verbatim excerpts to
describe the participants' experiences. Fourth was writing the
structural description. The Fifth was finding the essence. The
researchers made a descriptive passage that focused on the common

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experiences of the participants. A blending of the textural and the

structural description was made.

This study was reviewed and approved by the University of Northern

Philippines Ethics Review Committee. Ethical principles observed in
the study include the conflict of interest, principle of informed
consent, principle of privacy and confidentiality, principle of
vulnerability, recruitment, benefits, compensation, and community
considerations.

3. Results and Discussions

Concept Map

In this study, where former PDLs were the primary sources of data,
the researchers, after having completed data collection through in-
depth interviews, made use of the thematic method of analysis which
resulted in the identification of the three significant themes together
with their sub-themes that emerged from the experiences of the PDLs
which include the following: (1) causality of “being”–unlawful
conduct, ambivalence –excitement vs worry, fear vs hope; (2)
lifeworld of a PDL after incarceration –struggles –family obligation,
social disapproval, escape from reality; realization –to be a better
person, becoming closer to God; reintegration; (3) vision –providing
for the needs of their families, to be married.

Theme 1. Causality of “Being”

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The released PDLs expressed their thoughts and feelings about the
reasons for their incarceration. They also articulated their emotional
experiences after knowing of their long-awaited freedom or release
from jail.

Subtheme 1. Unlawful conduct. It refers to an action that grossly

violates the laws on appropriate or legally accepted conduct or
behavior based on the provision of the Philippine Constitution. Such
acts have corresponding punishment or penalties as provided for by
the Revised Penal Code of the Philippines and other special laws of
the land.

In an interview with the participants, the researchers discovered that

three of them were convicted of murder, 3 in violation of RA 9165,
and four were sentenced due to rape. As the interview progressed,
the participants disclosed the difficulty or hardship they experienced.
Participant 9 stressed, "For the time I set foot in jail, I felt life was hell.
I wanted to die. There was no more reason for me to live. I was in
total disbelief that I can no longer do what I used to do.” Participant
8 also expressed that he almost lost his sanity and that what he did
was pray. Looking through the facial expressions of the other
participants during the interview, the researchers felt the pain the
participants went through emotionally. These revelations support the
findings in the study conducted by Barolo & Vicente (2019), where
the participants disclosed that they had trouble inside the prison,
which included difficulties in adjusting to prison life, the feeling of
powerlessness, adherence to unwritten laws, bearing the pain for the
sake of the family, staying out of trouble, exploitation of the weak,
and they feel that they are the forgotten victims. These difficulties led
to the thought of self-destruction in the participants.

Subtheme 2. Ambivalence. It refers to the mixed feelings and

reactions of the participants when they came to know about their
eventual release from jail or prison. The responses of the participants
at the time of the interview revealed a common frame of reference.
All of them had ambivalent feelings. Positive feelings that were first
experienced were eventually clouded by negative ones.

There is a saying that difficult or hard times are never permanent;

challenges and trials of life while they have become inevitable, life
also presents a lot of surprises, so to speak; while there are times of
suffering due to misconduct, with perseverance and determination to
change for the better, the course of life may change. Such has
become the fate or case of the 10 participants of this study. Due to
some reason or other, they were eventually released from prison. The

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long-awaited freedom, however, brought the participants to

ambivalent thoughts and feelings.

Subtheme 2.1. Excitement vs. worry. This ambivalent emotional

reaction to participants' knowledge of their eventual freedom made
them pause to examine their feelings during those times. Initially, all
of them became excited. “Who is not excited to be reunited with a
family you had been away from for several years?” said one
participant. “However, my excitement suddenly disappeared when I
thought of how others would react towards me," he continued.

Going beyond the verbal articulations of the participants, there was

indeed a moment especially seeming indecision or ambivalent
reactions of the participants. Below is a narrative of their mixed
emotional expressions:

“When my case was heard and when I came to know that I will soon
be released, I was extremely happy for I will already be with my
family. After a few moments, I suddenly became worried. What kind
of life awaits me outside jail or prison?”

“There was an overwhelming happiness that I could not explain. It

feels like all thoughts of sadness suddenly disappeared. After quite
some time, I was suddenly worried about what would happen to me
outside? ”

“There was extreme happiness and feeling of gratitude to the

Supreme Being yet there was also a feeling that was very negative. I
worried. Questions like, will my family and relatives accept me?”

“I was so happy. I jumped for joy. I was teary-eyed. Deep inside I told
myself thank God I can already leave this place. This feeling was
afterwards seconded by negative thoughts and I worried about
whether or not I can go through with life after my release from jail. ”

From the foregoing mixed emotional responses of the participants, a

question on why an individual still worries about his freedom which
was taken away from him for so long a time? Ideally, a PDL would be
very happy without being taken aback by negative thoughts or
feelings with the information of his eventual release from jail or
prison.

The negative feeling felt by the participants in this study could be

understood from the perspective of the theory on Social Stigma,
which explains any others that once a "criminal will always be a
criminal." From this viewpoint, released PDL suffers the stigma of
being negatively judged. The participants, probably because of this

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awareness of the tendency of most people to discriminate as well as

prejudicial attitude, become worried. Too much worrying made the
participants experience psychological distress. As asserted by
Bautista et al. (2020), psychological distress is a form of mental
uneasiness. It is an antecedent of multiple effects –personal,
psychological, or behavioral disturbances.

These feelings were due to their perception of life's uncertainties

outside prison. They were not sure about how they will be able to go
through with life. They have no source of income either. A question
like, “how will I go back to my family?” become a prominent thought.
One participant even revealed that because of the enormous
expenses pertinent to court hearings and the like, almost all of their
properties were sold. As he said, “Life is hard; I want to start anew
but how? I am even sick now. How can I look for a living?”

The revelation of feelings of the participants is indicative of more or

less normal emotional states, considering that one of the essential
natures of human beings is the capacity to feel both positive and
negative emotions simultaneously.

Subtheme 2.2. Fear vs. Hope. In consideration of mixed emotional

reactions, the participants also claimed to have experienced fear and
hope at the same time. Fear is a feeling that is produced when an
individual feels some uncertainty in situations he has to face. Former
PDLs feared that others in the community, particularly those who
knew them, might not accord them the usual respect they used to get
before they were incarcerated. The thought of being judged made
them fearful. Participant 7 disclosed being discriminated against. He
learned about this through a friend who visited him before his release
from jail. His friends before his incarceration were no longer his
friends on Facebook. Some blocked him, and some unfriended him.
Knowing all of these, however, did not deter the participant’s hope of
a better life outside jail. Participant 4 even mentioned,

“I know people will judge me, I accept I was afraid of social rejection.
I used to be with others, enjoying the company of my friends to the
fullest before my incarceration. I have anticipated to be discriminated
upon my release. It happened. I was so afraid of rejection. But this is
my life now. I have to make a choice and that is to hope for the best.
It doesn’t matter if people will not accept me. I have to stand firm
because of my family especially mother. There is hope for a better life
outside prison.”

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As featured by Collier, L. (2016) in her article "Growth after trauma,"

post-traumatic growth (PTG) explains this kind of transformation
following trauma and holds that people who endure psychological
struggle following adversity can often see positive growth afterward
where people develop new understandings of themselves, the world
they live in, how to relate to other people, the kind of future they
might have and a better understanding of how to live life.

Further analysis of the participants' responses seemed to explain that

though negative emotions like sadness and fear were compelling,
positive emotions took one leap forward by making them more
concerned with thoughts of being reunited with their families. They
struggled to overcome social ostracism, rejection, and discrimination
by spending more time at home. As disclosed by one participant,
"after I was released, I spent two weeks at home without going out. I
was afraid to be judged. Gradually however, I got the confidence to
go out in the neighborhood. It was indeed a journey of finding my
self-worth after incarceration. I had no choice but to grapple with
life."

The above observations validate that no matter how complex the

situation is, there is always hope for a better tomorrow. Today one
sheds tears. Tomorrow might be full of laughter. Indeed in the case
of the research participants, although difficult, they tried each day to
live "as normal beings" with their respective families. Going back to
live with their loved ones gives them so much joy. However, this
conflicts with the expressed feelings of one PDL one of the
researchers happened to interact with while they had an educational
tour at the NBP. The researcher recounted that the PDL, who was one
of the facilitators in the welcome program of the NBP to the students
and faculty for their educational tour, mentioned, "I am happy here,
I have no more family to return to. The New Bilibid Prison has become
my family. Here, I am accepted. I am treated with respect. I even feel
happier here than when I was outside. This is now my home. "

It is also worth mentioning that one participant was released from jail
through probation. He said he had no other way if he wanted to go
back to his family. "I was forced beyond freewill to accept the crime I
was accused of as that was the only way I can go home sooner. My
family wanted to fight for my case in court because they know I was
innocent. How can a homebody like me with no cellphone be involved
into drugs? I was a victim. I nearly lost my sanity that I even wanted
to end my life.” Because of probation, I was released from jail after
two years. I was extremely fearful that I would become a victim of
injustice again. I cannot go out without my wife or any family

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member. Thank God I am happier now. I still have an intense fear that
I cannot go back to the place I was falsely apprehended, but I have
high hopes that those behind my incarceration will also have their
time of reflection/realization.

These expressions of feelings revealed by the participants are in

keeping with the Broaden and Build Theory. According to this theory,
positive emotions can have the effect of broadening awareness and
response to events as well as building resiliency and coping skills. It
helps to explain how we can move away from a survival mode of
responding to situations into a more expansive and thoughtful
approach to life (Cuncic, 2021).

Theme 2. Lifeworld of a PDL after incarceration

The lifeworld of a PDL after incarceration speaks about their lived

experiences—the struggles they had to go through in their
reintegration process.

Subtheme 2.1. Struggles. Struggles refer to efforts or actions to

enable an individual to adjust to a perceived situational difficulty. The
participants in this study, being former PDL, admitted that they went
through a process of adjustment after they were released. They
affirmed that there seemed to be difficulty reintegrating themselves
into the family and community, mainly so that upon their return, they
have to be engaged in productive activities to survive.

Subtheme 2.1.1. Family obligation. Family obligation refers to a set of

duties that should be discharged by released PDLs, particularly the
father, grandfather, or son, to provide for the family's physical,
emotional, moral, and spiritual needs. According to Participant 3, the
most significant challenge he has to face is how he can provide for his
wife's and children's financial needs. He stressed,

“It is so difficult to be an ex-convict. It is even harder to find a job.

That is why I am doing everything to earn a living by selling barbeque
in the afternoon.”

In like manner, Participant 1 revealed that from the time he was

released, all his time was spent looking for ways to help earn for the
family's daily living needs through gourd hat making. Similarly,
Participant 8 said, “I did a lot of things. I worked hard in the fields and
did household activities like cleaning the surroundings. I accepted
agricultural lands from my mother and from other people so I had
relatively vast agricultural lands to cultivate just so I can provide for
my family.”

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Alongside with financial obligation of the PDL for them to provide

emotional, moral, and spiritual support to their family, most
especially to their children, Participant 3 stressed,

“I made it a point to share very honestly my experiences to my family

with an intention of making myself their mirror for them not to follow
my footsteps.”

Also, Participant 4 exclaimed, “While at home I did the best I can so

my family can truly or fully accept me. I became as humble as possible
and did everything my family requested from me.”

Subtheme 2.1.2. Social Disapproval. Social disapproval refers to a

feeling of not being accepted due to negative evaluation or judgment
from others. The study participants collectively expressed that when
they were released from jail, they noticed a change in how others in
the neighborhood treated them. They, however, reported that their
respective families did not change. They even felt closer family
relationships after their incarceration. While they found full
acceptance from their families’ feelings of not being totally accepted
by the community prevailed. As stated earlier by Participant 3, it took
him weeks before he got the confidence to mingle with others in the
community. Indeed for a released PDL, his community well-being, as
described by Purisima et al. (2023), is a concept that refers to an
optimal quality of healthy community life.

Regardless of intensity resides in every individual, the motivation to

surpass or rise above a crisis or emotionally draining situation. Human
beings have the inherent ability to become resilient no matter what.

Subtheme 2.1.3. Escape from reality. Escape from reality denotes

desperate attempts of the person to run away or escape from a
perceived crisis by committing suicide. This is the situation common
to three of the research participants. Being a PDL has been very
difficult for all of them. They all experienced excruciating emotional
pain or distress, and three attempted to kill themselves.

As Participant 7 said, “It was the end of the world for me. I wanted to
die by hanging myself.”

Participant 8 also expressed, "What is the use of living if I have to be

in jail all my life."

These statements made by two of the released PDLs concretely

illustrate how desperate they had been, "Life has no meaning," added
Participant 8. While Participant 7 said, “to die is better than to be
accused of a crime I am not guilty of.”

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Apparently, the expressions made by the participants seemed to

indicate admission and non-admission of guilt. The two who
attempted to kill themselves did not in any way express that they
were guilty of the crime they were incarcerated for. The other one,
throughout the interview, was consistent in saying he was not guilty.
He was falsely accused. In his words, "There was no more hope for
me."

The above presentation of interview data boldly explains the difficult

struggle for a person deprived of liberty. While it is true they were
already out of jail; they suffer the stigma of being a "criminal." There
seems to be an influence of the social stigma “once a criminal will
always be a criminal.”

Subtheme 2.2. Realization. Realization results when an individual

who went through a difficult event in his life acquires objective or
factual mental representations of reality, enabling him to learn
lessons instrumental to his becoming a better version of himself and
ultimately living a meaningful life.

The PDLs were found to have realized two important things in life: to
become a better person and develop a closer relationship with God.
This runs parallel to what Tamayo & Rodillas (2023) had discovered
as the result of the trauma experienced by COVID-19 survivors, where
they claimed to have become more prayerful, thus, developing a
closer relationship with God.

Subtheme 2.2.1. To be a better person. With an in-depth

contemplation of what life was like in jail or prison, the participants
all mentioned in the course of the interview that they were able to
realize many things in life. They all revealed a difficult transition from
being totally free, where they could do everything they wanted to do,
to an absolute loss of freedom. They disclosed further that "when
they were put behind bars, they were less of a human being, that
there is no more hope for them to be back to normal. Their release
from jail made them learn a very important life lesson. To live a
meaningful life entails many obligations and reasonable self-control
and discipline," says the youngest participant. “We need to be very
careful with our actions to avoid offending others. Never in my
wildest dream to go back in jail," said another participant. "When I
left prison, I couldn't stop thanking God for a second chance. I need
to resolve not to go back to my usual self. I want to become a role
model to my family, who suffered so much emotionally because of
my misconduct," another participant shared.

A closer look at the participants' responses, the researchers

concluded that all the participants had forced upon themselves to live

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a new life. A renewed life to all of them is a life where one can be at
peace with oneself as well as others. “When I was out of jail, though
I had still some doubts on whether or not other could accept me, I
told myself, once I stepped out of this place, I will never come back. I
will always remind myself to have discipline and a sense of control."

Further scrutiny on how the participants responded to things they

realized in life, the researchers were moved or taken aback by what
one participant had expressed. It is noteworthy that throughout the
interview, this participant stood firm in his declaration that he was
not guilty of the crime he was accused of, “I was a victim of
circumstances; I was forced to plead guilty," he expressed.
"Nevertheless, thanks for the lesson I learned, karma is real. I know
someday the people behind my suffering in jail will experience the
same in the future”, he expounded. This participant also disclosed
that he has become extra careful in all his undertakings and in how
he treats his family and others so as not to be falsely accused again in
the future.

The foregoing seems to validate the findings of Barolo & Vicente (n.d.)
that the PDLs decided to become submissive, accept the
consequences of their actions, keep themselves busy, and continue
participating in religious activities as a way to deal with the prison
atmosphere. Challenges can also lead to self-reflection and self-
renewal, faith in God, seeing prison as a safe haven, and having an
optimistic outlook on life.

Overall, the participants lacking experiences indicate that the drive to

a better "self" is sometimes facilitated by unfavorable experiences.
The desire to actualize oneself seems innate in most, if not all, human
beings. Truly, the drive for self-actualization is the most challenging
task for everyone. In Maslow's words from the hierarchy of needs,
self-actualization represents the highest-order motivations, which
drive us to realize our true potential and achieve our "ideal self"
(Komninos, 2021).

Subtheme 2.2.2 Becoming Closer to God. Becoming closer to God is

an attitude which refers to a tendency wherein the PDL’s faith in a
supreme being becomes the sole source of upliftment or spiritual
empowerment. In difficult times “praying to God” became their
number one source of strength.

In this study, the researchers discovered that the participants noticed

instances wherein their families became more prayerful. As
Participant 4 said, "Upon my release from jail, I noticed that my father
and grandmother always go to church. They were thankful to the Lord
for my release and, at the same time, continued praying for the

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welfare of everybody in our family. Participant 8, on the other hand,

also said, "While I was in jail, I prayed every day. When I was released,
the more I pray. I pray not only for myself but for the entire family. I
always ask God to guide me and help me overcome evil. More
specifically, I ask God every day to always be with me wherever I go."'

The confessions of the participants indicated that “belief in divine

intervention” is the ultimate source of comfort for individuals in
difficult circumstances. Such holds true with what Participant 8 said,
"I did not pray this hard before. Only when I was jailed and after my
release did I learn to seek God's help and protection." In another
revelation by Participant 7, "Life for a PDL like me is difficult to
survive. I learned not to trust myself or anybody for my protection.
There is only one who can really protect me. From the time I moved
out of prison, I looked up with tears in my eyes and said, "Thank you'.
God has never forsaken me."

Subtheme 2.3. Reintegration. Reintegration refers to the process

whereby an individual like the PDL can return to the normal way of
life outside prison. Essentially it is going back to the family and the
community without experiencing a pinch of discrimination or
disapproval. In its fullest sense, it means living life normally as if
nothing happens in the past.

As discussed previously, the release of the participants from jail

created ambivalent or mixed emotions. The challenge of
reintegration for a released PDL is indeed great. While their freedom
made them happy, they were also worried at the same time because
of feelings of uncertainty, but because "life must go on" though
difficult, they all resolved to think in the end that there is life after
incarceration. They tried so hard to overcome feelings of rejection as
well as being judged by developing or shifting to a positive mindset.
The support of their respective families added to their coping in
reintegrating themselves, most significantly into the community.
While they felt discriminated against by others, the love they felt from
their families dominated as their source of inspiration. Turning to God
also enabled them to develop a stronger character. It is worth
mentioning that all of them eventually were able to go out and mingle
with others in their respective places of origin. More importantly, all
of them except one who is suffering from a stroke are engaged in
income-generating activities.

The following is a narrative of the declarations of the participants:

Participant 1: “From the time I was released, we live each day as if it

would be my last on earth with my family.”

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Participant 2: “I could feel the sincerity of other people treating me

right. Thanks God people are nice to me.”

Participant 3: “From the time I was at home, I noticed the

extraordinary joy and vitality in my mother.”

Participant 4: “My father and grandmother became very prayerful.

They always go to church to pray for me so I can start anew.”

Participant 5: “My old friends showed their sincerest gesture of

acceptance. I felt I was not judged. ”

Participant 6: “I was happy that I was given the chance to go back to

work as a carpenter and that I do not notice any discrimination from
my companions at work.”

Participant 7: “Though I still felt at times some elements of

discrimination, I just tell myself to ignore and move on with my life.”

Participant 8: “My live-in partner did not leave me.”

Participant 9: “While at times I still have doubts, I can immediately

regain my self- confidence because of the way my wife and children
treat me.”

Participant 10: “I was so happy with the way my family and others
treat me. This is because they knew I was innocent.”

The account presented seems to be in keeping with the findings of

Reamico (2022) that having the feeling of acceptance from the
community, mind-shifting, support from the family members, and
being hopeful of positive eventualities were very important coping
mechanisms in the reintegration process of any former PDL, for them
to gain back and boost their self-confidence and live a normal life.

Evidently, while the reintegration process was affected by the

participants' uncertainty about social approval, it is interesting to
note that one of them had a different experience. His release from
jail brought joy to others who knew him because he was innocent.
Thus, he seemed not to have experienced much hardship adjusting to
life outside prison.

Theme 3. Vision

According to social scientists, the development of an individual in

social, spiritual, and mental is, in a way or in part, a function of one's
experiences in the environment. "Experience as most people say is
the greatest teacher.” However, without reflection or realization, it
does not always result in learning or self-enhancement. In the case of
the participants in this study, their valuable realizations in life led
them to a life’s vision.

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Vision refers to what a person would like to see himself in the future
in terms of the quality of life as well as his intrapersonal and
interpersonal relationships. According to the participants, as they
revealed in the interview, their experiences in jail gave them a lot of
lessons in life. They all claimed to have the internal motivation for a
renewed life. Participant 2 said, “If I would be lucky enough, I want to
be a renewed person.” Also, Participant 3 exclaimed, “To me, I have
high hope for the future for I know I can be a better or renewed
person for the sake of my family.”

It is interesting to note that Participant 7 has discovered the true

meaning of life. He shared the following context of his conversation
with a priest friend, “Outside jail there will always be people who will
hate you particularly those whom you might have hurt intentionally
or unintentionally. Some people may even judge you. They will even
discriminate you. Worse they will not trust you. But look can you
control them? Can you tell them, wait this is me, I am a better person
now? You cannot do that. There is only one who understands you,
who loves you unconditionally. He is looking at you right now. He is
your God and my God. Rise above; remember your mother, your
family and you. From now on make God the center of your life.”
Gradually, he was able to recover, and as of the time of the interview,
he was a picture of a man with high hopes for the future.

Clearly enough, there is life after incarceration. By the same token, as

shared by Participant 8, “From this time I was released from jail, I
became prayerful. I always thank God every day and always ask Him
to protect me and my family so we can have a brighter future. I look
at the future positively, that is why I always remind myself to have
self-control. My goal is to have a peaceful life, a life full of meaning
and with contentment.”

Interestingly, all the other participants share the same dream of

having a peaceful life in the future. The following are accounts of their
revelations during the interview:

Participant 5: “I want to see a peaceful life in my future.”

Participant 7: “I see life to be a happy one. I project myself to be a

happy person, neither materialistic nor aiming for any luxury in life,
to be able to eat, 3-square meals a day and have peace of mind would
be enough for me.”

Participant 9: “The only thing I wish is to have peace of mind so I can

concentrate to work for my family so I can help my wife to support
the education of my children.”

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Subtheme 3.1. Providing for the needs of their families. Providing for
the family emerged to be one of the major aspirations of the
participant. They all expressed their motivation towards the selfless
act of love and said that their welfare becomes their second priority.
They don’t care about their own needs because their everyday life is
already spent serving and working hard for their families.

According to Participant 8: “To provide for the welfare of my family,

my children and my grandchildren is all that matters to me. To the
best I can I will work hard for me to give them what they need so they
will be happy.”

Similarly, Participant 1: “I could not see myself in the future anymore

especially so that I am already old. My only concern in the future is
my family, the welfare of my children and grandchildren.”

The above utterances of the participants are clear manifestations that

no matter how far an individual may go or to whatever extent one
might have been into, “family is and will always be a family.” Indeed,
the saying “charity begins at home” is exemplified in the future
aspirations of the participants.

The exceptional desire and concern of the participants in providing

for the families could be better explained by some biblical passages,
especially from 1 Timothy 5:8, that providing and caring for the family
becomes the ultimate expression of faith in God. As previously stated,
the participants who have become more prayerful and have
developed a closer relationship with God, thus, have a common
aspiration of making their families a priority.

In their quest for an in-depth understanding of the situations of

released PDLs in this area, the researchers gathered related
literature, particularly on the testimonies of former PDLs. In one
episode of ToniTalks (How Pastor Danny Found the true meaning of a
Father's Love, January 1, 2023), a former PDL turned pastor made a
shocking revelation about how he was transformed into a loving
father and good provider. In an interview with Toni, Pastor Danny
narrated his struggle inside and outside prison. It was only when he
became closer to God that he transformed into a better person. At
the time of the interview, Pastor Dany disclosed that he had built a
closer relationship with his wife and children after his renewed
relationship with God.

Subtheme 3.2. To be married. The desire to be married and build a

happy family in the future was clearly expressed by two of the
participants in this study. This revelation reminded the researchers
about the stages of psychosocial development proposed by Erik
Erickson. According to Erikson, one crisis an individual passes through

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during the early adult years is building intimacy. Intimacy is the ability
to be able to open up romantically and emotionally to those closest
to the individual (Slifer, 2022). Similarly, Intimacy is a feeling of
closeness and connection in an interpersonal relationship. It is an
essential part of intimate relationships, but it also plays an important
role in other relationships with friends, family members, and other
acquaintances (Loggins, 2022).

However, getting married is not the ultimate expression of intimacy.

Interestingly, this has become one of the ultimate dreams of the
participants who were not yet married at the time of the interview.
At the time of the interview, one participant claimed he wanted to be
married to his live-in partner. “I want to build a happy family of my
own," he said. "Once I have enough savings, I would propose for our
church wedding with my girlfriend," he continued. Truly, developing
romantic relationships is vital to an individual's well-being. Navarro et
al. (2020) cited that romantic relationships may impact key
developmental tasks such as family relationship transformation, close
relationships with others, and career planning.

The above clearly shows that "marriage" does not exempt anyone;
the right to marry is for everybody regardless of status as well as
background.

4. Conclusions and Recommendations

A person becomes deprived of his liberty on the ground of unlawful

conduct. Eventually, liberty is regained when the corresponding
penalty is completed, or any legal reason for that matter. The thought
of living outside jail or prison, however, can bring ambivalent or
mixed feelings to a PDL. While there is excitement and hope for
another life outside prison, worry and fear can come about because
of perceived uncertainties. The PDL’s life after incarceration is not
easy. They had to struggle to fulfill their obligation to their family
while battling some impediments, from social disapproval to the
tendency to end one's life as a form of escape. Their relationship and
belief in God, however, dominated over all the negativities they
encountered. They finally realized that towards their reintegration,
they need to become a better person. The valuable component of
PDL’s vision is to provide for their respective families. Aspiring for a
selfless life disposition, they are willing to sacrifice their personal
happiness. Of equal importance as well is the vision of young PDLs for
a happy life with a loved one or a spouse or to be married someday.

Concerned government and non-government agencies may consider

providing development-oriented activities like mental health
awareness, self-enhancement, and resiliency to PDLs to support their

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psychosocial adjustment toward effective reintegration. Whenever

or wherever possible, released PDL should be given assistance in the
area of economic productivity. TESDA, for instance, can be tapped to
provide released PDL with livelihood skills for them to realize their
dream of becoming gainfully employed for the sake of their families.
In like manner, concerned agencies like the University of Northern
Philippines (UNP) can design an extension program or activities for
the benefit of released PDLs. The Department of Social Welfare and
Development, an arm of the government in providing services to
vulnerable groups and individuals for their empowerment, can
consider making the released PDLs one of their clientele groups. If so,
activities like family development sessions and life-skills training will
be provided to sustain the PDLs’ motivation and desire towards self-
direction and a sense of positive disposition. A follow-up study
emphasizing the emotional well-being of released PDLs can be
undertaken as an offshoot of this investigation.

Study limitations

While the researchers are convinced as to the importance of their

research findings to add up to the literature that would lead to a
better understanding of released PDLs' situations, they took notice of
several limitations in the overall generalization. One important
consideration would have been an in-depth analysis of the
participants' emotional and mental well-being.

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