Month: March 2018

Retro Review: Barbarella (1968)

~ beetleypete ~ 54 Comments

I write a lot of stuff on this blog about serious films. Films in foreign languages with subtitles, films dealing with aspects of sexuality, and films that are sometimes harrowing to watch. But believe it or not, I have also seen a lot of comedy films over the years, as well as films that might be considered satirical, slapstick, or just plain silly.

In 1968, I was 16 years old. I used to go to the cinema all the time, mostly to watch films I had read about, films made by directors I had started to admire, or starring actors I had respect and admiration for. But very often, I was not averse to just pitching up and going in to see whatever was on that night. And one of those nights, I saw this.

You could call it a science fiction film. It is set in the future, has spaceships and distant planets, and some unusual creatures too. But it is unlike any science fiction film I had seen before, or for that matter, since. Barbarella (Jane Fonda) is a space traveller, tasked with searching for the missing scientist, Durand Durand. (Not the pop group, they stole his name, and dropped the D) He has developed a ray weapon that might be used against Earth, so must be found.

Barbarella immediately gets into trouble. After crashing on a strange planet, she is captured by creepy small children, who set tiny robots dolls on her. She is saved by the patrolling child catcher, who takes her onto his ice-craft, requesting sex as payment. By this time, sex on Earth has developed into taking pills which simulate orgasm, so Barbarella’s first real sexual encounter gives her the taste for more. The man tells her that Durand is on Sogo, so she travels on to find him. On the way, she encounters a blind angel, (John Philip Law) who has lost his desire to fly, and a band of rebels led by  a man named Dildano. (David Hemmings). She restores the angel’s flying ability by having sex with him, but is soon captured by the wicked Queen of Sogo. (Anita Pallenberg)

Barbarella discovers that Sogo is built on a sea of living energy, called The Matmos. Durand has seemingly gone mad, and with the power of The Matmos, he has developed a machine called the Orgasmatron, designed to kill anyone placed inside, using ultimate sexual pleasure. He aims to finish off Barbarella, and puts her into the machine. But he isn’t reckoning with her sexual powers, and she proves to be too much, even for the mighty Orgasmatron.

I know, it sounds silly, and it is. But it is a feast for the eyes, lovingly made, and often very amusing too. Obviously a satire on space films like Flash Gordon, it adds the sexual element, which is never really salacious or unpleasant. It laughs at itself, and the accomplished cast know exactly what they are doing too. Above all, Fonda shines. She looks amazing, (and has never looked better before or since) and manages to play it straight, in many otherwise ludicrous situations. Great support from Milo O’Shea as Durand Durand, and the lurid but imaginative sets all adds up to a real fun film that leaves you smiling.

See, I do ‘fun’ too. 🙂

Significant Songs (175)

~ beetleypete ~ 23 Comments

I Wanna Stay With You

I had heard of the songwriters Gallagher and Lyle during the late 1960s. They had written for Apple Records, and both later joined the band McGuinness-Flint, enjoying a major chart hit with the song ‘When I’m Dead And Gone’. The Folk roots of that song didn’t make it appeal to me that much, and it was a while before I noticed them again. They formed a duo in 1972, and embarked on a career of recording their own songs, none of which I took any notice of at all.

By 1976, they had already released four albums, and I had been blissfully unaware of their new career. Then the fifth album appeared that year, and I sat up and took notice. The easygoing pop song ‘Heart On My Sleeve’ got into the charts, and the pair appeared on TV pop shows. I thought it was OK, but still a little Folk-based for me. But another track was released from that same album, and that one really got into my brain, and under my skin.

It had a different feel, some orchestration and brass instruments, and built up very nicely indeed. Although I could tell it was them, from the distinctive vocal, I realised that this great little love song was very much my kind of thing. I bought the single, and played it constantly. Forty-two years later, I still like it as much as that first time I heard it.

Retro Review: Hellraiser (1987)

~ beetleypete ~ 30 Comments

I had never read the book ‘Hellbound Heart’ by Clive Barker, but caught the buzz around this British horror film that he wrote and directed, based on his story. Reading the book first would certainly have given me a better idea of what I was about to see unfolding on screen, but the startling visuals and effects made knowing the plot secondary to experiencing this unusual slice of horror.

(This review is about the original film. I have not watched the many sequels that followed.)

There is a puzzle box that unleashes terror. Strange creatures from another place, and eye-popping body-horror that has stayed with me ever since. Flashbacks set the mood, and explain some of the story, but this is not a film you sit back and analyze, rather one that keeps coming at you, and hitting you in the face. One man’s (Barker’s) vision of Hell on Earth, and oustanding in its execution of that vision too.

I will give you some idea of the plot, but believe me when I say that it really doesn’t matter.

Frank finds a strange puzzle box, and tries to solve its complicated design. As he does so, he is captured by the Cenobites, a chilling group of half-human disfigured creatures who live to inflict pain. Later, his own brother saves him, when he also finds and tries to solve the puzzle box. But in saving him, he is also doomed to the Cenobites. Frank returns stripped of his flesh, and uses his loyal girlfriend to lure victims to the house, so he can use their skin to regenerate his body. But the Cenobites are not to be trusted, and come back after Frank, and his family too.

It doesn’t sound much, I agree. But it is much more than it sounds. Characters like the Cenobite leader, Pinhead, his face and head pierced by countless needles, and the exposed body of Frank, devoid of any skin covering. Such images will stay with you for a very long time. And Pinhead left us with one of the best lines in any horror film, ever.

“We have eternity to know your flesh”.

Just been watching…(60)

~ beetleypete ~ 25 Comments

The Stranger (1946)

***No spoilers***

There is a free film channel in the UK called ‘Talking Pictures TV’. I recently managed to update my PVR to receive it, and have been enjoying its mix of old British films, and many American classics too.

This film starts with a man on the run. Allowed to escape from a European prison, he is nervous, obviously foreign, and he travels to South America, where he receives information about the location of a man he is desperate to get in contact with. Meanwhile, a team of investigators discuss his actions, hoping he will lead them to someone they are also seeking.

Small town America, 1946. White picket fences, and a place where everybody knows everyone else, and their business too. The war is just over, and people are settling back into the routine of jobs, and everyday life. When an edgy stranger gets off a bus, and goes into the local store that sells everything, he is immediately noticed. But he is also being followed, something he is unaware of. The stranger visits the house of a local College Professor, where he meets the man’s fiance, preparing for her wedding that evening. Unable to wait to see the man he is searching for, he goes off in the direction of the college, and encounters him in the woods.

This is film noir of course, but with a different slant. Nazis fleeing from prosecution, and the organisation determined to root them out. People hiding in plain sight, trusted and accepted by decent Americans living a prosperous and happy life in a town where you can walk home alone at night, and nothing ever happens except the arrival of the bus. A town where people love their dogs, respect the rich, and buy everything from one tiny shop. As the viewer, we readily accept this vision of a cosy utopia. One that is about to be shattered by unexpected events.

What lifts this above so many similar films is immediately obvious. An Oscar-nominated story, and the direction of Orson Welles, who also stars in the film, acting with his usual flair and precision. A dogged turn from a familiar Edward G. Robinson as the investigator, and solid support from Loretta Young, as the young woman deceived. We get an impossibly juvenile Richard Long as her brother, roped in to assist the investigator, and a priceless Billy House, as Mr Potter, the chequers-playing owner of the buy-everything store who sees all.

As you might expect, this is Welles’ film in every respect. His signature monologues dominate the scenes that feature them, and his wry grin pops up at just the right time. Direction is spot on too, from the overviews of the peaceful town, to claustrophobic night scenes in bedrooms and clock towers. Although to modern audiences, this might seem rather overblown, with Loretta Young often descending into melodrama, and the hunt for the elusive Nazis perhaps mirroring the Communist witch-hunts that came later, it is never less than entertaining, often gripping. The tension builds, then settles back into something homely and innocent, before racking up to the startling set-piece climax.

They don’t make them like they used to? They certainly don’t.

Zoomquilt: A reblog

~ beetleypete ~ 28 Comments

Thanks to my blogging friend, John, over at https://americanliberaltimes.blog/ I was mesmerised by one of his blog posts today. It is an eye popping feast for the senses from a site called Zoomquilt.

Stick with it, and it takes you on a very strange journey into the computer screen
http://zoomquilt.org/

But hold on tight to your chair, because it made me dizzy!

Little Old Man

~ beetleypete ~ 91 Comments

It was relatively warm, and quite sunny here today.

I took Ollie out for his usual walk, just before 2 pm. I could have got away with wearing shorts, but the mud is still heavy, so I had on trousers, and wellington boots. I felt quite lifted in spirit, during this first day of what could not only pass as Spring, but also perhaps an early Summer.

After the usual couple of circuits of Beetley Meadows, I considered heading into the small woodland area, just for a change. Ollie enjoys it in there, if the mud is not too deep. As I approached the gate, I noticed a family group approaching, with a Labrador dog. Ollie noticed them too, and rushed up to inspect the unfamiliar beige dog. I couldn’t keep up with him, so left him to it. There were no issues, as Ollie jumped around the small dog.

As I got closer, one of the children asked his Mum where the dog had come from. She smiled at the small boy, and answered, “It’s OK, he’s with that little old man”. My first reaction was to turn around, to see who she was talking about.

Then I realised she meant me.

Fictional musings

~ beetleypete ~ 55 Comments

I have never made a secret of the fact that I enjoy writing short stories, and publishing them on this blog. I get the most satisfaction from writing fiction, approaching it in something of a style, and going from idea to published story very quickly, without too much time for research and construction.

That many of you read them and comment is always a source of delight to me. Whether or not you have enjoyed them, the fact that people take time to read them is very much appreciated. When I have received praise for them, or criticism, both are equally valuable to me.

As you may know, I have occasionally written some in the form of a serial. One of the first, ‘Travelodge’, was in three parts, later followed by ‘Tubby’s Toe’, a gangster saga, in six long episodes. The most recent attempt, ‘Gary’s hot date’ ran to four parts, and concluded last week. That was my first attempt at a real ‘happy ending’ too, and felt a little strange to me.

Today’s musings concern the idea of such serialisations, and one fact in particular. Easily able to estimate from the viewing stats provided by WordPress, I came across something that I found quite surprising. Although most die-hard followers and readers stuck with all the episodes of those serials, often commenting all the way through, most readers read only some, or part of them. If they read the first parts and decided it wasn’t for them, that’s easy to understand. But in most cases, it was the later episodes that received the most views, often twice as many as previous posts, including the beginning to each story, which in many cases received the least views.

I am now thinking about all those people that read parts five and six of a story that had four previous episodes. What did they think was happening? It would have made no sense as a stand-alone piece, and I always publish warnings about serials at the start of each post. The most recent four-parter enjoyed more views of the last episode, that the three preceding it. How did they ever manage to work out the whats and whys? I confess that does intrigue me.

But it’s not the end of the world. Just musings.

Thinking Aloud on a Sunday

~ beetleypete ~ 61 Comments

Time passing

The clocks went forward here this morning, so I woke up having already lost an hour of the day. I will have to wait until October to get it back.

More significantly, it is the start of the last week in March. Three months of 2018 have passed, and it seems like only yesterday that I was putting the Christmas decorations back up in the loft. January and February were harder months this year. Worse weather than usual, seemingly endless cold, and even some worryingly deep snow. But even being trapped in Beetley, spending time huddling inside in the warm, failed to make those months pass at a ‘normal’ rate. They flew by, just as March has done.

I have written before about how time seems to go by much faster as you get older. And it’s getting worse. Weeks feel like days, and days are almost over before I am even out of bed. I have given a lot of thought to why this happens, and at first I just wrote it off as an ‘age thing’. But lately, I have had a complete re-think, and now have a new theory.

For those of you still working (the retired among us will just have to use memory) you will be aware how long a day at work can seem. When it feels like it must surely be time to think about getting ready to go home, you realise you haven’t even had your lunch break yet. Even in an interesting or exciting job, days can drag, I assure you. If you work a normal Monday to Friday routine (I didn’t) then the weekend always seems to go by at twice the speed of two weekdays. You get home on Friday, and before you know it, you are getting off to sleep on Sunday night, having to face another five long days at work. It seems to be a law of Time, that a Saturday and Sunday must pass twice as quickly as a Monday and Tuesday.

After spending far too much time thinking about all this unnatural bending of time, I woke up this morning with the solution in my head. It was so simple, I should have worked it out many years ago. Work. Work makes time slow. One year at work feels like five, and one day at work can seem like a week. Time never goes by too fast at work. Nobody looks at the clock at finishing time and asks, “Where did that day go?” Giving up work, whether intentionally as in retirement, or because you have lost your job for some reason, is the moment that time starts to accelerate. Leisure time is not work time, not in the sense we understand the 24 hour clock.

So perhaps we should never stop working? We might not live longer, but it would feel like it.

Great Albums: Hunky Dory

~ beetleypete ~ 41 Comments

In 1971, the same year that I bought the Carole King album, ‘Tapestry’, I bought an album by David Bowie. It was called ‘Hunky Dory’, and the two records could not have been more different. This was the fourth album that Bowie had released, and he had already made some impact around the world, with songs like ‘Space Oddity’ and ‘The Man Who Sold The World’. I was 19 years old, and after reading about the buzz around this new album in the music press of the day, I decided I had to have a copy.

One of my better decisions in life.

Track one, side one was ‘Changes’. A song so different, and so overwhelmingly good, I was lifting the arm of the record player back to the edge, to hear it over and over again, before I had even got to track two.

The second track was Bowie’s own version of the song ‘Oh You Pretty Things’. This had been a hit single for the group Herman’s Hermits earlier that year, with Bowie playing piano on that recording. But it might just as well have been a different song, as this version by the composer was light years better.

Make no mistake, this is not a record you put on to party to. I doubt any track is suitable for dancing, and it is definitely not background music for a social occasion either. It demands both careful listening, and serious appreciation. The song lyrics are simply amazing in the main, and come with lots of meanings and interpretations, giving something for everyone. Bowie is known for clever construction of some of his songs, alongside some simple tunes that at first appear to be little more than forgettable pop songs. Listen longer, listen more carefully, and you will actually find touches of genius here. By the time I had listened to track four, I thought I was going to never recover from the symphony that was ‘Life On Mars’.
This was modern music at an entirely different level.

Side two continued to enthrall. After Bowie’s version of the happy Paul Williams song ‘Fill Your Heart’ started the side off on a cheery note, I was immediately blown away by the inventiveness of track eight, ‘Andy Warhol’ Leaving on some talking as an intro, the great acoustic guitar that follows leads us into a witty and clever appreciation of the man that was the artist of the title. I played this one at least five times straight off, carefully placing the needle on the groove each time.

With all the hype that followed later, it is easy to forget just how talented David Bowie was. The man could not only sing, but sing well. You can understand every word he says, and he sings those words with the skill of a great actor, reading his lines.

Track ten saw Bowie as a rocker, with the punchy song ‘Queen Bitch’. Great build up to crescendo vocals, and snappy lyrics. I didn’t think this album could get any better, but then I heard track eleven. Few songs have affected me in my life as much as ‘The Bewlay Brothers’ did that day. Does it mean anything? Is there some significance to the title, the lyrics, or the unusual construction? I didn’t know, and still don’t. I didn’t care, and still don’t. It was the last track on side two, and as soon as it was over, I flipped the disc and played side one again. And that continued for most of the week that followed.

The year after ‘Hunky Dory’, Bowie released ‘Ziggy Stardust’. A new persona, and a different style. One of many more that were to come during a long career. It was only after 1972 that ‘Hunky Dory’ began to get full attention, and became a belated worldwide hit. Although I own almost every album that Bowie released, I have never liked one better than ‘Hunky Dory’.

Here’s the original track listing.

All tracks written by David Bowie, except where noted.

Side one
No. Title Length
1. “Changes” 3:37
2. “Oh! You Pretty Things” 3:12
3. “Eight Line Poem” 2:55
4. “Life on Mars?” 3:53
5. “Kooks” 2:53
6. “Quicksand” 5:08
Side two
No. Title Length
7. “Fill Your Heart” (Biff Rose, Paul Williams) 3:07
8. “Andy Warhol” 3:56
9. “Song for Bob Dylan” 4:12
10. “Queen Bitch” 3:18
11. “The Bewlay Brothers” 5:22

Late night shopping

~ beetleypete ~ 82 Comments

***This is the concluding part to a serialised story. If you have not read the previous episodes, please do so first, or it will make no sense.***
1) https://beetleypete.wordpress.com/2018/03/17/garys-hot-date/
2) https://beetleypete.wordpress.com/2018/03/20/andrea-comes-clean/
3) https://beetleypete.wordpress.com/2018/03/21/a-date-rearranged/
4) https://beetleypete.wordpress.com/2018/03/22/friday-looming/

This is a fictional short story of 1200 words.

Gary waited until the tea break to check his phone. After almost being late, he didn’t want to be seen looking at it at his desk. Sure enough, there was a message from Andrea.

Morning gary i hope you u had a good night i woz so excited i could hardly sleep
just today 2 go then we r out on friday i really cant w8 i hope im busy today so it goes by fast and friday comes sooner love andrea xxxxxxxxxxxx

He replied in his usual polite but restrained fashion.

Me too Andrea. Love Gary. xxx

Gary looked again at the new photos Andrea had sent him. He didn’t mind her short hair at all. There was a time when he thought girls with shorter hair were more attractive anyway. And what if she looked at least the same age as him? That was better than her looking too young, wasn’t it? He switched off his phone and dumped his half-drunk plastic cup of tea into the bin. Old man Wilcox was on his case this morning, and arriving back early from tea break would look good.

Not for the first time, Andrea was wishing she had someone to talk to about Gary. In most offices, girls would chatter on about boyfriends and dates, she was sure. But she was the youngest in her department, and the two other ladies were a little distant. Edna was really old, so old she was a widow. And Dorothy only ever talked about her son, who was a successful lawyer. Neither of them ever asked Andrea what she did with her spare time, or even if she had a boyfriend. She was annoyed with herself for forgetting to bring the tote bag with her high heels in it. She would have to try on the new dress wearing the flats she had on for work. Never mind, she would go on tiptoe, and simulate the effect.

When Mr Wilcox left early that afternoon, Gary was smiling. That meant that they would all get off on time, and he could get across to the new shopping centre, and buy that shirt. When he had checked his phone at lunchtime, there was no message from Andrea. He was a little put out by that. Funny how soon you get used to getting regular messages, even though they seem a pain at first. He smiled to himself, wondering how he could miss someone he had never met, or spoken to.

Andrea picked up the dress in her size. She took all three colour options into the changing room, just to be sure. The dark red had been the first one she had spotted, but finding the same style in midnight blue and sea green had made her doubt herself. She would try them all, and then she would be left in no doubt. As none of them would look right with the grey tights she was wearing with her business skirt, she stripped down to bra and pants, going with the red dress first. The changing cubicle was quite large, and the mirrors on each side allowed her to see the full effect. A few inches above the knee, and just low enough at the front to be suggestive, but not revealing. Quarter sleeves suited the design, and it fitted well, without being too clingy. But after trying on the other two, she was torn. The midnight blue really looked the part, much dressier. She decided on that one, and changed back into her work clothes before heading over to the cash desk.

Gary found the shirt, and quickly flicked through the rail, in case there was one he liked better. But he knew his mind well enough, and stuck with his first choice. After paying for it, and being handed back the shirt in a bag, he realised he had plenty of time. He would go down to the food court to get something to eat. As he approached the escalator, his phone went off in his pocket, and he stopped to look at the message.

O gary i just got the best dress for tomorrow its a gr8 colour and i think u r gonna luv it just 1 more sleep and 1 day at work then we will b meeting up at the chinese i cant w8 love andrea xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Gary smiled, stupidly content that she had sent a message after all. He slipped the phone back into his pocket and walked onto the escalator, failing to notice that he had walked straight in front of a lady who was just going around him. She tripped over his leg as he stepped out, tumbling straight down the moving stairway, head first. Her handbag and shopping bag went flying as she fell, and she continued almost to the bottom, until her fall was blocked by the body of a big woman lower down. Gary ran down the left side of the stairs, and before he could get to the lady, a crowd had started to gather around her, with some shop staff talking urgently into hand-held radios.

Andrea felt rather silly. She was lying on her back with her legs sprawled wide open and her skirt around her hips, displaying the comfort gusset of her tights to everyone around. Her elbow hurt, and as she tried to get up, a woman in the shop uniform told her to lie still. “Help’s on the way” she shouted, as if Andrea was deaf. Someone had pushed the emergency stop button on the escalator, so at least that had stopped moving under her leg. A serious young man pushed through the people around her. He was carrying a first-aid bag, and had a radio clipped to a tab on his shirt. “Lie still madam, that’s a nasty cut on your face. I’m just going to put a dressing on it. An ambulance is on the way”.
Andrea nodded, wincing as he pushed a bandage of some sort onto her chin. Looking over his shoulder, she could see a man a few steps further up. He looked strangely familiar, but she couldn’t immediately place him.

Gary couldn’t get down to the lady he had inadvertently tripped up. Shop staff and first aid people were around her, but she looked up and caught his gaze. Her hair was very short, and the long lines either side of her nose ran down to the edges of her top lip. Before he could stop himself, he blurted out a name. “Andrea?” The serious first aid man looked up. “Do you know her? Are you together?”

Andrea answered. “Yes we’re together. His name is Gary, and he’s my boyfriend”.

Years later, they would still laugh about spending their first date in the emergency department of the local hospital. They never did get to that Chinese restaurant. And Andrea never mentioned his height, not once. Just as he never mentioned the huge scar that ran right around her chin.