knight of paradox

watercolor

“When I get honest, I admit I am a bundle of paradoxes. 

I believe and I doubt, 

I hope and get discouraged, 

I love and I hate, 

I feel bad about feeling good, 

I feel guilty about not feeling guilty. 

I am trusting and suspicious.

 I am honest and I still play games. 

Aristotle said I am a rational animal; 

I say I am an angel with an incredible capacity for beer.
To live by grace means to acknowledge my whole life story, 

the light side and the dark. 

In admitting my shadow side 

I learn who I am 

and what God's grace means. 

As Thomas Merton put it, 

"A saint is not someone who is good 

but who experiences the goodness of God."

 - Brennan Manning,

The Ragamuffin Gospel: Good news for the Bedraggled, Beat-Up, and Burnt Out

artist's play room: darkness and light