Portal:Portals
A portal is an introductory page for a given topic. It points out good articles on a topic, allowing non-featured material to be highlighted in some form. Portals also help editors find related projects and things they can do to help improve Uncyclopedia.
Portals are the best way to start exploring Uncyclopedia. Or, they would be, if it wasn't for the fact that most people don't really care about them, so they aren't really edited that much. But we can always pretend that they're active, for the sake of maintaining a minimum of credibility as an encyclopaedic wiki.
This page explains how portals work.
Uncyclopedia is a poor, meme-ridden "comedy" website that has cemented itself into online infamy. The site, which is thought to have originated in 1860 as an American imperialist tool for global domination, is now a multi-national effort and is viewed as the best of its kind by some.
Uncyclopedia specializes in tedious mockery of perceived competitors and petty in-fighting, with much of the content seen as mass-produced junk. Yet, there remains a peculiar fondness for some of the articles by fanatics. This is a view that has sparked a substantial shift from the site's satirical aspirations, causing it to instead redirect its resources into pathetic Russian reversals and endless references to Chuck Norris. This is compounded by the need for articles that appease a "softer consensus".
- "Real" Timothee Chalamet at 2024 look-alike contest actually Finn Wolfhard
- Qatar personally gifts Trump a plane
- Austria wins Eurovision (Pictured)
- MLB welcomes cheaters and pedophiles into HOF
- New cast and plotlines announced for longest running Filipino sitcom
- BREAKING: NEW POPE ALERT!!!
- Trump: "You're not the boss of me now and you're not so big."
- Phil Collins comes out of retirement after wank
- PBS and NPR to lose funding
- Spain and Portugal experience a country-wide blackout
- Sportswriter Leon Sandcastle gives his two cents on NFL draftee Shedeur Sanders's draft slide
- Trump believes that 200 countries negotiated trade deals with him
- Man delivers profound philosophical speech about elephants during his sojourn at the zoo
- Upcoming South Park season will be Canadian
- World shocked as Pope Francis kicks bucket (This is not a drill!)
- Chris Rock will succeed him in new comedy Head of Church
Ongoing: Eurovision • The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, and Deltarune • Russian Invasion • Israel-Palestine conflict • DOGE budget cuts • Trump and Xi's tariff games • The IRS hunting late tax payers
Recent deaths: Ruth Buzzi • LeBron James' playoff run • Night Court • Lopez vs Lopez • Jayson Tatum's Achilles and Boston Celtics' repeat hopes • George Wendt • Updates for Mortal Kombat 1 • Rick Derringer
Upcoming deaths: DEI • Google's ad monopoly • Cleveland Browns' locker room • LeBron James' career • Diddy's and Chris Brown's chances at freedom • Tom Cruise's career of sprinting on-screen
“Here you can read one of the finest quotes about the portal of the topic”
- … this is a portal?
- … the portal has a topic?
- … even if the portal doesn't have a topic, it should still have a pretty nice ass? Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't, that's a portal
{{#css:Uncyclopedia:Portals/styles.css}}{{PortalNav}} <div class="portal-container portal-platonic"> <!-- INTRO --> <div class="portal-row portal-panel"> <div class="portal-panel-header">{{Portal header|Platonic Portal}}</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{/Intro}}</div> </div> <!-- HIGHLIGHTS --> <div class="portal-row portal-highlights"> <!-- HIGHLIGHTS COLUMN 1 --> <div class="portal-highlights-column"> <div class="portal-panel portal-blurb"> <div class="portal-panel-header">{{Portal header|Featured Article|Selected Articles}}</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{/Selected Articles}}</div> </div> </div> <!-- HIGHLIGHTS COLUMN 2 --> <div class="portal-highlights-column"> <div class="portal-panel portal-blurb"> <div class="portal-panel-header">{{Portal header|Featured Image|Selected Pictures}}</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{/Selected Pictures}}</div> </div> </div> </div> <!-- BOTTOM ROWS --> <div class="portal-row portal-panel"> <div class="portal-panel-header">More Portals</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{Topics}}</div> </div> </div> [[Category:Uncyclopedia Portals]]
Here is the code for an example "blurb" subpage
<noinclude><gallery> File:Article1.jpg|[[Article1]] File:Article2.jpg|[[Article2]] </gallery></noinclude> <includeonly><choose> <option>{{Selected article |article = Article1 |image = Article1.jpg |author = |summary = }}</option> <option>{{Selected article |article = Article2 |image = Article2.jpg |author = |summary = }}</option> </choose></includeonly>
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Art
Peak pretentiousness -
Business
Money, money, money! -
Comedy
The science of funny -
Culinary
Food for the soul -
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Enter the Matrix -
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Recess time -
Gay
A gay ol' time -
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Get lost -
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Factually wrong -
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Literally illiterate -
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A series of tubes -
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Rock on! -
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Politically incorrect -
People
The people's portal -
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Speak of the Devil -
Science
Playing to be God -
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We live in one -
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Breaking stuff easier -
Television
Turn your brain off -
Theatre
To be or not to be -
Video Games
Better than sex -
Zoology
Beware of furries -
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Meta-Portal -
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The Community -
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The Uncyclopedia