The Scoop on Poop

Don't worry - we will not be showing poop photos!!

Da Harlow was worried!

Me too!

Having moved to the great frozen north after a lifetime in the Arizona desert, I've noticed picking up poop (as Chief Poop Collection Officer) takes on it's own, um, fun qualities when it's a little chilly outside.  Those of you that live in climates that freeze will laugh at me, but I'm okay with that.  Think of this as more of a PSA for desert dwellers.

Pooper Scoopers freeze....
Every pick-up includes a short and frustrated struggle to release the scooper from the grass it's stuck to.   ...and no, the poop scooper is not invited to live with the rest of the tools...  Once it's free, I've found that the scooper does not want to open it's mighty jaws of poop doom.  Getting the scooper to function is another issue - I currently use a scooper that is missing teeth.  Mainly from trying to get the jaws open.  ...and yes, I could switch to a standard rake and scoop,  but think that my next point may make that type useless.

Poop freezes to the ground...
This is the reason I don't think I could use a rake and scoop.  Some poop needs to be pried from the ground using a shovel or other solid item.  This is also the other reason my scooper is missing teeth.  Never try to pry frozen poop from the ground with a plastic scooper.  Just FYI...  Additionally we've had a poop stuck to the ground since October.

OCTOBER!!!

I've given up on trying to collect it.  I also had to buy a new scooper because of it.

Frozen poop does not deter a poop eater....
Yes, one of our beloved pups is a poop eater.  We won't mention names, but let us just say that it's a certain nekkid pup wearing fuzzy leg warmers.  You'd think ice cold poopsicles would deter him, but they don't.   ...and that's all we will say on that subject!

One of these pups is guilty of Grand Theft Poop - and it's not the fuzzy Princess with the cardboard tube in the front.  Just saying...

I'm sure I can say a little bit more about frozen poop, but a certain Princess has just informed me it is a delicate subject and we shouldn't talk about it again, to spare the sensitive readers in the group.  There goes my PSA!!


Okay, enough said!

Yay!

Monday Fun...

What do you do when you have a lot of costumes and no place to wear them?  You find a tasty bag of doggy treats and see if Harlow would be willing to model a few of them...

She seriously loves her cookies....

Her face when she realized it would be impossible to go potty in all these skirts...

I'll admit, when I pulled the sheet off the couch and repositioned her (for contrast) I had to gather up hall her skirts and help her off and back on.  I really did feel like her "lady in waiting".

Making sure I hadn't run out of treats....

Princess Harlow!

She needed a portrait to hang in the Great Hall of her Pretty Pink Princess Castle.  I'm thinking this last one would work perfectly! 

We hope you have a wonderful Monday!

Swiss Army Pup

It occured to me as I was looking through photos this morning that Harlow actually performs a lot of various functions here.  She has sort of become a "Swiss Army Pup"...

What are those functions you ask?

Well, for starters she helps with the house cleaning...

Nobody appreciates de work I do here....

Helps remind us that facials are important...

Mud does wonderz for da toes too!

Taste tester...

Dese noms are good!

TV censor...

Close da eyes, Momma, it gets scary here!

Public Service Announcement - her mission is to warn us about the dangers of fruit...

Seriously - can you eat cantaloupe after seeing this?

Structural Support Engineer...

How that wall manages to stay upright without her support we will never know!

She imitates meerkats so that we can study them...

I iz good meerkat in da back yard Savanna...

Shredder...

I didn't like that book anyway.  I wish!  Wahhh!

Sentry...

Ducks.  11 of the clock, Momma.  Just saying...

Puppysitter...

Okay, we are working on this one.

...and most importantly she comes in a small easy to carry package!

Harlow VS. the Couch

I think she was trying to do this...

The preferred couch sitting method - if you are Harlow.

...but it somehow ended up like this...

She is really scrunched up....

Oops - she is waking up...

The peepers are opening...

You laughing at me?

Avert your eyes!

In our newly renamed Garden Room is an old arm chair that belonged to Aaron before we were married.  For some reason, dogs take one look at it and decide it is there for them to nap on. Sam was the first:

Sweet Sammish

...and then Monty came along and decided he would also use it for napping:

I iz trying to naps!

Last but not least, Harlow...  (Please avert the eyes of any young and impressionable pups...)

Our little exhibitionist...

Our Sunday - the Chalk Edition

Sometimes I like to buy things just to see how the boys will interact with it.  Today's find was a box of 15 large pieces of chalk for 99 cents.  How could I pass it up?

Here are the boys doing a "What's this?"  I took this picture about two seconds before Monty took off with the box of chalk.  You can see him starting to steal it here.

What's dis stuff?

 After chasing the boy through the yard, we got back down to work.  First off, the boys got to choose their colors. 

Blue for me, Mom!  Could I have orange?

....and we got to work!

I'm not in the way, am I?

Due to the day being bright and sunny, we kept losing Monty to his sunbeams.  Sam didn't mind helping all the way through.  Finally, it was time to get both boys to pose.

Mama's little helper...

You can tell Monty wasn't ready to give up on the reflections yet... 

I love these boys!

We hope you all have a great week!

The perils of walking Monty

In order to control Monty's extraordinary energy, walks are a must.  Sometimes, depending on how many witnesses there are, I even try to run with Monty.

...and yes, having no witnesses is a must...

You see, Monty is excellent at walking and he loves running.  Most of the time he is the picture of a perfect canine exercise partner.  He trots steadily and smoothly, no pulling on the leash, and can cover any distance quite easily.

Except every once in a while.  You never know when it will happen.  It could be the 12th outing or the 47th.

You will be cruising along, moving like a fine athlete and look down to admire your handsome pup by your side and realize he's watching you.

OMD, you realize in a panic, he's having a Walter Mitty moment.  ...and he thinks he's a cheetah!  (This varies - sometimes he thinks he's a wolf, or a panther, and once I think he was a shark.)

Worse yet?  He's a cheetah hunting prey, and you are a three-legged impala stuck in a mud puddle. 

After that?  It's all down hill.

WHAM!

I have to admit, his take-down methods are pretty effective.  So far he has been 100% successful. 

I is stalking you....

...and Aaron wonders why my shoes are always filled with gravel....

Product Placement...

...currently happening at our house! Penn - please call for Sam's rates and availability!


On a side note - does anyone know how to add .pdf files to Blogger? I've been trying to add a few of the recipes I've collected, but cannot figure out how!

Thank you!

Commercial possibilities

Hello all, Aaron here. Christine wanted me to mention that Sam has lost 7 lbs over the past month…You may recall that prior to his recent troubles Sam had been under vet’s orders to lose weight, and undoubtedly his ongoing illness has been a contributor to that loss; but I think his progress was admirable, even before this bout of Yorkie’s Revenge.

Thinking about that got me to looking closely at my Sam’s shaved belly this morning and I began to wonder if it bothered him, laying there on the cool tiles without a protective layer of fur…was he aware of how odd he looked with his pink skin on display? And once his morning walks resume will the other dogs make fun of him? Will they shout hurtful things like, “Hey Sam, uh, most guys go bald on top first!” or “Sam, uh, uh, nice pink belly ya got there!”

Dogs are often mean, but very seldom are they quick or clever.

I thought about how I might ease some of his embarrassment and hit upon an idea. So, after a trip to the garage for an old sheepskin seat cover, a couple of shoe strings and voila, I had it! The Tummy Toupee.


Looked pretty good I thought, could even have commercial possibilities. It’s warm, protective, only slightly unfashionable, and lacks vermin. An all around winner! Kind of like Ugg boots for your belly.

I began to have fantasies of financial independence, where late night Tummy Toupee infomercials become the stuff of legend and Hollywood stars are battling to appear in our life story, entitled:

Shave it again Sam, or How to be Hairless and Happy.

I saw Sam being played by Brad Pitt, with Wilfred Brimley taking my role.

Alas, it was not to be…Sam took offense to the whole concept and refused to play along, even when I suggested that instead of Brad Pitt and Wilfred Brimley, we go with Rupert Grint and Salma Hayek, respectively…sure, it would require a minor rewrite, but I felt it was doable. Sam still said no.

However, I’m not ready to give up on my dreams. Sam and I will capitalize on this opportunity somehow…


I wonder if GoldenPalace.com is still buying ad space?

PTSD*

*Post Traumatic Shower Disorder

Wednesday's photo showed the preliminary to Sam's bath...he knew what was happening, and ran around the house for five minutes carrying his collar, hoping someone would put it back on him, and thus avoid the indignity that was sure to follow.

Then he spotted it: the black bath restraint! It was time to high-tail it out of there, pronto.



Caught! Notice the tautness of the leash. He had his butt planted on the patio and was refusing to budge.



It was futile...he pleaded one last time to be set free, to be allowed to roam and stink in doggie splendor, as nature intended.



But to no avail. His fate (and dampness) were assured. It began...



Please Sir, won't you spare me any further humiliation?



Once back inside, he took the opportunity to spray the living room with water in revenge for his peoples unconscionable behaviour. He didn't understand why we only laughed.



"Perhaps if I rub the moisture in the carpet; maybe that will shut them up! Oh, if I only had thumbs, I'd make 'em pay!"



All right, all right, that's enough laughing...somebody help me get dressed.

Samgrid and Fang

Sam enjoys the HP movies, but I hate it when he starts stompin' round the house in those big boots, talkin' 'bout "how dogs is seriously misunderstood creatures."

I am the Batdog

The Yorkie: [to Batdog] You’ve changed things… forever. There’s no going back. You see, to them, you’re just a freak… like me!

I'm not a freak...I'm the Batdog!

I am not a nerd...

OK, so I still live with my mom, and maybe I don't have a job, and sometimes I like to pretend that I'm an active member of the Rebel Alliance...but really, I'm quite the studly young dude.

One happy boy...

Actually, make that two happy boys. Sam and I missed our favorite girl while she was out getting all "national parkerized" over the past couple of weeks, and we've both been barely able to contain ourselves ever since she got home.

And the stories she came back with! Most interesting to me was her first-hand reporting of the fact that, "yes, he most certainly does..."

Daydreaming

Sam watched the Wizard of Oz last night and for some reason identified with Dorothy, rather than Toto. And he's certain that the flying monkies are somehow related to the Yorkie...