Followup

This is a followup to my January 1 post. In March, Tom had two seizures at home, and one at the local hospital after the ambulance brought him there. He later went down to the hospital I mentioned in the other post. He stayed only a day, and is now on an anti-seizure medicine. So far, it has worked. And he sleeps better than he has in twenty years. 

This has been harder to deal with than the post-concussion because he cannot drive. He has a followup zoom appointment with the neurologist in October and he is hoping he will be able to drive again. Was the concussion caused by a seizure, or did the concussion bring on seizures? Or are they unrelated? There has been no real answer. We just have to accept what is. It is mostly okay. He tires easily, and must rest during the day. He does have some memory lapses but nothing really important. He has stuck to the low saturated fat regime, and though he misses some things, he is mostly okay.

I am really going to try and write more, and read your blogs which I have missed so much.

And a Happy New Year!

 I've always loved John and Yoko's Christmas song, and particularly these lyrics:

"And a happy New Year. Let's hope it's a good one, without any fear."

Why "fear"? Just because it rhymes with year? I don't think so. Artists are geniuses at coming up with just the right words. There is so much fear everywhere. Wars, climate, politics, and more personal fears about one's life.  

We have had some months of fears. Tom had a fall and had to go down to the hospital where Hazel was born ten years ago. They needed to check him out because of concussion and brain bleed (aren't those awful words). This happened on August 30th. He came home on September 1st. While he was there, it was discovered that he has a heart ailment called "a-fib" and then later found out he has high cholesterol. One wouldn't expect a vegetarian of 52 years to have such a thing, but the past few years he has eaten a lot of fat - cheese and butter particularly. Probably this is stress-related from issues dealing with his mother's old age. 

I went online and found out how many grams of saturated fat he should have in a day. It was miles less than he had been eating. He began mindfully living by those grams, and has lost a lot of weight. We won't know for a while if it has done good with the cholesterol numbers. Apparently there are some kinds which are genetic, rather than caused by diet. 

He had a stress test for the a-fib and found that his arteries are not clogged. That is such a relief. He only has to take an aspirin a day to deal with it. The cholesterol medicine comes with warnings for most everything on earth, but I am ignoring them hoping the eating less fat will make a difference. 

He definitely has post-concussion stuff. The problem is that we think he had three before this, but he was never unconscious as he was in August, and we never thought much about them. Now, knowing what we know, there were side effects. He is working hard to rest more, and walk, do qigong, and meditate each day. Slow and steady wins the race, we hope. 

All this is why I have written even less lately than before. The days have been sometimes exhausting. 

I am really going to try to write more in 2024. I have continued to read your blogs, though not often commenting. I want to be a blogger again. 

Today's picture

 The old one and the young ones

Weights and lengths

 If you grow zucchini, you know that even if you check often there will still be one that you miss until it is overgrown. After our big one was picked today, Hazel said that I should take a picture and put it on my blog! 

When we weighed and measured it, we were kind of bowled over by a couple facts. The zucchini weighed 2.2 pounds and was 13 inches long. 

When Hazel was born, she weighed 2.2 pounds and was 14 inches long. It makes me cry as I write this. She is a miracle, and not for a second do I ever forget it. And here she is today with that zucchini.

The costume

So here's our beloved Hazel in her Hallowe'en costume. I had never heard of The Mandalorian until she told us about it. You may read more here, if you are interested. She is wild about the show. Already the talk is about boys' and girls' clothing. Someone told her The Mandalorian was for boys. She doesn't care. She loves it! Today is the Trunk or Treat where parents park their cars and decorate them for Hallowe'en, and the little kids go from car to car for treats. 

Back by popular demand

Margaret didn't really plan on having a Hallowe'en party this year, but people asked and she did! Last year's party is here.

It was another warm evening. We haven't even had a frost yet! Unheard of around here. But it has meant that the lovely autumn has gone on for a longer time. 

The kids and parents were down the hill until it got dark and then they made their way along the trail to our house. There were even more creepy delights than last year.

This one probably wins the creepiness award! Tom moved the tractor down into the field so the spider would have a home. There were battery candles that lit up at night.

And here is a closeup.

The "graves" were made of styrofoam.

There were lights along the road to brighten the path.

The two last pictures were taken as I walked down the hill, not up to our house. Margaret's driveway is to the left by the orange maple tree.

When the kids arrived at our house this is what they found.

Some views of the path after dark

It was a spooky, magical, and wonderful time! Again, we are so very lucky to be a part of it. Many people thanked us and I told them this is all Margaret and Matthew and Hazel. Year two of putting together a great party. One of the mothers took a picture of all the kids and put it on Instagram with the words, "Best Halloweeen Party Ever".

Past times

 

I have lately been watching a program which is on Britbox - Bergerac. I'm sure all my English friends will know the series. The other evening as Jim pulled up to the gas pumps to have his car filled with gasoline, I got to thinking about what I enjoy about the older shows.

No CCTV

No cell phones

Airplanes with outdoor steps on and off the plane

And the thing I probably miss the most - gas stations that pumped your gas.

I will easily admit that I have never filled up my own car. I hate the smell. I didn't want any residue on my hands. I hate the crowds, with cars always lined up behind you. I wonder is it just my age or do older people pump their own gas?

Even in my children's childhoods, we went to the gas (also known here as service) station. They put gas in the tank, cleaned the windshield [they even kept bottles of washer fluid on the shelves with customers' names on them], added washer fluid when needed, checked the tire pressure and all the while chatting with John at the town gas station named for his father and another fellow who had it before him. 

John and I were light years apart politically but it didn't matter a bit. He was kind to my kids, he was a booster for all the sports teams in town, we loved the Red Sox, and I liked hearing him talk about his favorite band Credence Clearwater Revival. He was full of local stories he knew from living in this little town his whole life. 

We have lost something special in pumping our own gas, We've lost connection and personal service, and even friendship. It makes me ache with longing for such a simple thing that we all took for granted.

Quote du jour / Robert Finch

"But now in September the garden has cooled, and with it my possessiveness. The sun warms my back instead of beating on my head ... The harvest has dwindled, and I have grown apart from the intense midsummer relationship that brought it on."

-  Robert Finch 

I am quite sure this is the man the quote is attributed to.

It is so perfect, to me. This is exactly how we feel just now. The garden is pretty much over except for the glorious hollyhocks that just keep on comin', the sedum, and the ox-eye daisies in the blog header photograph. 

"Possessiveness". Isn't that just a perfect word for how we gardeners feel? We are trying to get it to look good and produce good vegetables. And now we can let it go. The season is over and all that happens now is cleanup and moving some plants around. The sun is not "beating on my head" anymore. 

And I love that phrase - "intense midsummer relationship". He isn't talking about "midsummer" in the British form. It is the actual middle of the summer, and for us that is pretty much July into August. And now we are in the last month of summer, with fall coming at 3:21 pm Eastern time on the 22nd. 

I took a little walk down the road to the mailbox today, and I thought to myself that these September days may be my very favorites of the year. Not only has the garden cooled but so has the air. There are no bugs, and there is an ease about life.

And some of that ease comes from the fact that Tom's mother is leaving the evaluation facility, and going back to where she was - in assisted living. The place also has a spot in memory care, should she need to go there. Not as close to us, but really only 90 minutes away, and Tom's sisters are only 45 minutes away. So we are all breathing a sigh of relief.

And, as I jotted down the quote, I had a vague feeling of having posted it before and by golly I did! You may find the post here if you are interested. I haven't changed a whole lot since 2007. 

The Whitstable Pearl Series by Julie Wassmer

The past few months have been a strain at Windy Poplars Farm. 

Tom's 93-year-old mother has had increasing signs of dementia, and is currently in a hospital where they are evaluating what is going on. From there we are expecting a move to a mental care facility and we hope it will be a place that is five minutes away from us. There have been a few times when his mother has expressed interest in moving up here - to independent living, and later to assisted living -  but every time it didn't work out. 

Our son Michael and his wife, Estée have separated. It has mostly been harmonious, but it is still one of those big changes that are very stressful and worrisome. They are now both settled into rental houses in the same town. They are, without any court intervention, sharing custody of Campbell and Indy. The kids seem to be doing alright, even well. Maybe at six and seven they are able to grasp that their parents are happier apart; better friends and parents not living together. As you may guess we, and Margaret have been very involved in this whole process. The kids have been up here a lot, which is good for all of us. I have a blog post planned with summer fun pictures.

With two big emotional situations in our lives, there haven't been many minutes to read during the day, and in the evening I just want to settle into one of the wonderful television shows available or an old, much-loved DVD. So almost all my reading has been bedtime, or early morning reading in bed, which means the Kindle. 

A few months ago, Acorn TV offered a new detective series called Whitstable Pearl. I enjoyed it, and naturally bought the first book in the series. As is so often true, the books are very different and offer a much more in-depth story and character development than television. This is not to say that the book is always better. I could barely read the Inspector Morse books, but I adore the television production and actually think it is much better! 

I expect I am not alone in being a foreigner who did not know that Whitstable is a real town. Look to the right - on the coast, and almost even with London on the map.

You can see loads of photographs here. It really sounds beautiful, though Julie Wassmer, the author of the books makes it clear that there are the usual problems with vacation destinations. The DFL, Down From Londoners, buy up property and use it occasionally, while the rest of the time they rent it out. These rents are mostly too high for the locals, and young people can't afford to live in the town they grew up in. Whitstable seems to have been able to avoid one of the downfalls of popularity and that is that their stores are less national names than local, independently owned. The author does an excellent job of portraying the landscape, the businesses, the public lands. 

I had the supreme reader's joy of reading the eight available books in the series, one right after the other. I so love finding a new-to-me author and doing this. The main character is Pearl who owns a restaurant called Whitstable Pearl which offers local seafood. She is a single mother whose son is now going to college in nearby Canterbury. This city is also described beautifully. Pearl's mother is a widow, quite alternative in her thinking (a bit like this reader), and very flamboyant in her choice of clothes and haircolors (not a bit like me there!). There are other characters who appear in many of the books, and then new ones who are introduced in each new murder case.

When Pearl was young she began going to school to become a police officer. She became pregnant with the love of her life (who by then had moved away), and had to leave. She isn't the kind to look back with regret. She has made a wonderful life for herself and her son. After her son leaves for college, she starts her own detective agency. She has a real gift for the work. She is one of those rare characters - a woman who is contented, self-assured, and quite genuinely happy.

I love this series and look forward to next year's offering.

A wonderful dog tale

Yesterday afternoon we were standing around the kitchen - Tom, Margaret, Hazel, Campbell, Indy, and I - when a police car drove up. This has happened a few times in our 40 years in this house. My heart always goes into my throat fearing for my kids. This time I wasn't concerned because Michael is in another town, and Margaret was right here! But I still needed to go out and see what was going on. The man asked, "Do you have a Pug?" I told him no, but my daughter does, and then I asked if she were dead. He said, "No, he's (he didn't know the gender) in the car!" Margaret was out the door by then, and we walked over and got the whole story. 

Seems a couple of out-of-staters were driving past our road and saw Piglet walking kind of in circles at the bottom of our dirt road which spills onto a busy, tarred state road. They stopped and picked her up and brought her to the police station. The police then drove over here. We were all so very grateful, and amazed. We talked for a long time about the wonder of this. How kind the people were to take the time to bring her to the police, and for the police to bring her back home. There were two of them, a man and a woman with the biggest smiles, probably in their twenties. Just the kindest, dearest police you've ever seen. I wish they could make the national news!

Margaret checked the town page on Facebook and the police had posted a picture of Piggie - (and here comes a bad pun) a "Pug shot", telling the story of where she was found and to get in touch with the police.

This is not the first time Miss Piggie has gotten into trouble. Another day a fellow drove into Margaret's yard, having picked up her up also at the bottom of our road. Again, such kindness.

And here's the thing. Piglet is not young. In fact she turned 14 this year! She can't see or hear very well, but she sure gets around. Here is a picture of her when she was a wee one. Less than a month after Margaret and Matthew got together they brought home this adorable Pug. I've often told people that you know it is true love when a couple gets a dog. 

And this is her a couple years ago. You'll notice the chair does not say her name.

Reading a tongue-twister at seven years old

 

March 2020

I had to look it up, but our presidential primary was on Tuesday, February 11, 2020. I remember being bowled over when I saw a few people at the voting place with gloves on. I don't think there were masks then. I couldn't believe people were so concerned about a "flu". I didn't think much about it again until March 12. We had been told that an old friend of ours was in hospice. We hadn't seen her for years. We drove over to the place, and were met at the door by someone saying we could not come in. She told us "our president" gave a speech last night that said nursing homes shouldn't let anyone in. Having not heard the speech, we were surprised. She said she would let us know when we could visit our friend, but that call never came. She died on the 29th. 

The next day, Friday the 13th, I had a haircut appointment. The woman and I talked about how exciting it was that the local high school boys were in the state playoff that night. By late afternoon it was announced that the game was cancelled. That's when I knew something much more serious was going on. All the schools closed. 

And thus began the year like no other.

Birthday party, and the evening after

My 73rd birthday was a week ago today, and this is the first chance I've really had to sit down and write about it. 

The whole family had not been together since November 1. There was school, there were rising cases in our state, those in authority advised that families not get together for the holidays, and we all decided it was best to stay in our little local pods. Yes, it has been very hard, but the health of all my babies is more important to me than anything! We've all been well, there haven't been cases in their schools, and we're all very careful so we decided we could get together during February vacation. As a birthday surprise, Michael, Estée, Campbell, and Indy showed up down at Margaret's. Tom was down there, and texted me there was a birthday surprise. I walked down and three kids raced to me. What joy!!

You may notice that my coat is buttoned unevenly. That's because the wind kicked up as I was walking down and I was struggling with one hand, grabbing at random buttons and buttonholes to get my coat buttoned. 

At the outside fire

Margaret made the cake. This is the recipe the family pretty much agrees is the best chocolate cake so why make any other! You may find it here. In that big bowl is chocolate whipped cream for the frosting. It was perfect!

A late Christmas present for Hazel - a dressmaker's kit with a model, material, and all the accoutrements of the sewing world. Estée has a business making clothes and doing repairs/adjustments to older clothes. They worked together for ages.

While Margaret taught the boys how to play Mario Monopoly. 

My grown-up babies.

We all agreed it had been the most perfect day, except for missing Matty who had to work.

And then ... when we got home, we saw that Lucy had peed on the kitchen rug. That is not like her. She has never peed anywhere except outdoors. Also, the water bowl was almost empty. We had been noticing for a few days that she seemed to be drinking more than usual. These are both signs of possible medical problems, so off Tom went to the local emergency vets who work the hours the other vets are closed. 

There was quite a line of cars when he arrived at five o'clock when they open. Someone came by to get information about what was wrong. He told them, and they came back after an hour and told him he could walk her to the door, and then they took her in. In about half an hour, the vet called and asked some questions. After another half hour or so, the vet called again to say Lucy's sugar levels were elevated. To make a long story short, she has diabetes, and Tom gives her insulin shots twice a day. They gave her a low dose to start her off, and said to go to our regular vet as soon as we could. He said she needed more insulin, so we upped it, and so far she is doing well on it. It has been a fraught few days as we've adjusted to this, but honestly you wouldn't think anything was wrong with our dear girl. 

They've told us that she is otherwise very healthy, and should be able to live with this a long time.

Addendum: On Friday Lucy went back to the vet, and he said the insulin had to be upped again because her sugar levels weren't what they should be. (I think that's the medical explanation) He said it can take a while to get this settled. She goes back again Monday morning. So she has gone from 10 units, the base amount the emergency vet gave, to 14, and now to 17. 

Hello dollies

" It is a fine thing to preserve and pass on the dolls of the past. And the dolls in native costumes are worth handing down, too, for there may well be a day when native costumes are gone. As countries get divided up and passed around, as people fly all over the world, probably everyone will dress alike, more's the pity."

Gladys Taber

Stillmeadow Seasons 1950 

I have written a bit about Tom's parents moving out of their home into an independent living apartment here. The follow-up is that after a couple years, they moved again; this time into assisted living. They needed help with medications and other things. Last month his step-father died. It was the best death one could ask for. He essentially laid down and after a few days stopped breathing. He was 97. Tom's mother has moved into a smaller apartment in the same building. She's doing well.

One of the things we were given when they made the first move was her doll collection. I spent quite a long time three years ago documenting it in our iPhotos, and have been meaning to do a blog entry about them for all this time. His mother had them catalogued years ago, and I matched the picture of the doll and its place of origin in our pictures. 

I am so fond of this lady!

 

Look how tiny these are

And here are some pictures of them arranged on the shelves.

The family of dolls on the lowest shelf were played with by Hazel a lot for a couple years. She had this special voice and made up stories about them.

 Because there wasn't a doll from South Korea, I went online to buy one. She is taller so she gets a shelf all to herself

And these two are my very favorites. They are from Hungary. The expressions are so great.

And I love this woman!

 We are so, so happy to have these dolls. And someday, they will go to Hazel. I thought I might have prints made of the information and the dolls and put them in an album.