Angels' Brigade

Here's a typical Mystery Science Theater 3000 flick, as seven large-breasted women take on a drug syndicate headed by Jack Palance and Peter Lawford. Not only is it a dumb rip-off of CHARLIE'S ANGELS in which the women run into battle like they're wearing high heels, but it is a catalogue of movie-making goofs, including mismatched shots, bad lip-syncing, visible cameras and crossing the line.

Much of the production money seems to have been spent on short appearances by Arthur Godfrey, Alan Hale Jr. and Jim Backus. Writer/producer/director Greydon Clark may be better known for SATAN'S CHEERLEADERS; he has certainly never done better than this inept piece of garbage.

Even watching this from the relative safety of MST3K, I felt offended at the events being shown. Jack Palance running around in that suit! Alan Hale, never being able to escape the role of The Skipper, and Mr. Howell er, Jim Backus, throwing away whatever dignity he had. Then there's our main characters. A very broad (no pun intended) range of just about every ethnicity, job, stereotype that you could think of. Very bad acting from our leading ladies here. I would like to think that Jack took this role on advice from his agent, who was probably drunk, and then quickly fired him. On a slightly different note, the cinematographer was one Dean Cundey. He has since gone on to bigger and better films such as Apollo 13.

Ow, it stings! Angel's Revenge is one of those movies that makes you smile, laugh, feel confusion, and extreme pain all at the same time. The makers of this one probably thought, "There's enough rubes out there who'd be fooled into thinking this is Charlie's Angels, so let's make a movie!" The result is a movie full of made-for-TV preservative preservatives. Some scenes are so laughably ridiculous like the drug compound and it's poorly defended facility. That's what Peter Lawford gets for hiring Jack Palance! After seeing a share of Bs, I have grown an appreciation of seeing Jack in low budget schlockers, but this film hurts so much that he's not even in the majority of the film! Probably out boozing it up with Pete backstage. Beware of Jim Bacchus in his role...be warned! This movie doesn't take itself seriously which becomes apparent really really soon.

The gals are definitely eye candy...and that's about it! Acting was not a prerequisite nor was having any dignity for being involved with this film! Watch the action sequences and why no action choreographer was hired (that would blow the entire budget!). Just your stereotypical big explosions, car chases, A-Team rip-off wannabe van, a girl hanging on to the trunk of a car, bouncing on trampoline, and so much more. See this MST style and see Mike, Tom, and Crow boogie down to the sultry singing of Michelle Wilson!

In a desperate attempt to capitalize on "Charlie's Angels", this movie pits seven (six, really) buxom, bejumpsuited beauties against the evil forces of Peter Lawford, Jack Palance, and some oily guy, all three of whom are pushing drugs on kids (who weren't getting paid for speaking roles). Lawford and Palance were probably down in the wine cellar for most of the filming, but where else can you see Pat Buttram, Alan Hale, jr., Jim Backus AND Arthur Godfrey all drool over the same women in one flick? One of the best MST3Ks.

Let's see. There was the idea that seven women without any sort of training of any kind would bring down a drug kingpin. There was the fact that none of these women ever thought to call in the police. There was the drug kingpin who stored millions of dollars of drugs in a ludicrously unguarded "processing compound."

There was this famous pop star who can apparently get around Los Angeles completely unrecognized. There was a "Vietnamese" character with a Japanese name. There was this high school girl hanging on to the trunk of a Caddy, uncommented upon by other drivers, as it sped through LA.

There were appearances by such actors as Jack Palance, Jim Backus(if you watch MST3K's version, Angel's Revenge, you can actually hear Mike and the bots groan when Backus makes his appearance), Peter Lawford(Tom Servo: "Do you think Peter Lawford even knows where he is?") and Arthur Godfrey. And there were plot holes aplenty and lots more awfulness besides this.

All of this and more make for one of the worst movies ever made by anyone. That anybody thought this was a good idea and that actors of the caliber of Jack Palance agreed to participate is mind-boggling. Watch the MST3K version which is one of their best efforts.