The Big Neighbor

"Dragnet: The Sitcom"? As Sergeant Joe Friday and Officer Bill Gannon wind down a tough work week, relaxation is on both their minds, with family man Gannon inviting bachelor Friday over for dinner and a football game on television in "The Big Neighbor," but like any sitcom of the era, wackiness must ensue. For a police procedural whose humorlessness, excepting tight-lipped sardonicism, was itself almost a comic caricature, this consistently amusing, generally light-hearted episode, scripted with snappy delight by Robert Dennis, comes as a refreshing surprise amidst the series' unsmiling stock-in-trade.

The fun begins when, following Gannon's invitation, Friday has him check with his wife Eileen (Randy Stuart) if the sudden intrusion is all right with her. It is, but not without some sharp repartee that signals the most remarkable aspect to "The Big Neighbor": Harry Morgan plays the straight man to Jack Webb, who is consistently hilarious, all the more remarkable because Webb doesn't break character but rather, as Friday and Gannon shed their official personas and display something akin to friendship, Webb reveals a droll, quick-witted side to Friday that must remain suppressed in his professional capacity. (Webb demonstrated a facility for wry comedy early in his radio career with "Pat Novak for Hire," a crime drama that nevertheless sent up film noir convention and cliché with winking glee.)

Arriving at Gannon's home in the Eagle Rock neighborhood of Los Angeles, the two detectives try to settle down to dinner and the football game, but the Gannon household is soon beset by visiting neighbors who keep the pair from following the Los Angeles Rams-San Francisco 49ers game. (And, yes, NFL games are not played on Friday nights except on "Dragnet.") First up is Marnie Prout (Ann Morgan Guilbert), who wants Bill to arrest her husband for . . . Throwing an egg-timer at her that didn't even hit her. Then Art Bonham (John Nolan) tries to get Bill to fix the parking ticket his wife was issued on their very own street--and don't think that the two dollars it will cost to be resolved won't return to bite somebody later on.

Actual drama does occur when neighbor Ruth Walker (Rhoda Williams) calls to report a man breaking into her home, with Bill and Joe going over to investigate while uniformed backup is on its way--and Gannon, in the most football action either cop will see this evening, delivers a tackle worthy of at least a tryout with the Rams. Okay, maybe not.

But the best delivery has to be the paydirt Morgan and Webb strike by playing Bill and Joe as the LAPD's Bob and Ray, deadpan detectives riffing off each other in smooth, effortless, straight-faced hilarity although Webb cannot completely conceal the sheer delight he's having by getting to let his hair down for a change.

"The Big Neighbor" is indeed atypical "Dragnet" fare, but what amounts to a classic shaggy-dog tale also underscores a key point about "the story you are about to see is real" aspect to "Dragnet." While each of these vignettes most likely did occur, it is also most likely that they did not occur in the same night; "The Big Neighbor" is hardly likely to be verbatim, instead compositing various vignettes into "The Big Shaggy Dog," a thoroughly enjoyable departure from the norm.

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Gee, what a goofy episode this one was. There was less than a minute devoted to an actual crime, the rest of the show being more "dry" comedy of "Bill Gannon" and his dinner guest "Joe Friday" unable to watch a football game because of constant interruptions by goofy neighbors.

We also get long lectures by Bill to poor Joe about getting married, the merits of wallpaper and other household interests, and other inane topics to a bachelor like Joe Friday. But Webb's character good-naturedly puts up with it all. He's amazing in the patience he demonstrates with his goofy partner.

Harry Morgan as "Gannon" is also excellent, of course. Who else could deliver such nonsense and still be so entertaining and likable?

In a change of pace, this ep of "Dragnet" mostly has Friday and Gannon trying to relax in the latter's home by watching a football game while waiting for Gannon's wife to prepare dinner. But neighbors keep pestering Bill about various goings-on hoping he'll do something about it, whatever it is! Eventually, something does happen for them to do their duty...I got bemused during the scene of Joe and Bill watching the football game as Bill goes on about various non-work-related topics while Joe just smiles and takes it all in stride. Among the guest cast is one Ann Morgan Guilbert, formerly Millie on "The Dick Van Dyke Show", as one of the neighbors and what a hoot she is, that's for sure! Also appearing is Kent McCord as a patrol officer about a year before starring in the Webb-produced "Adam-12". He'd be recurring throughout the season. In summary, "The Big Neighbor" was a nice change-of-pace for "Dragnet 1968".

This is an odd episode and I doubt if another police show ever did an episode quite like this one. It's actually supposed to have occurred during an off evening for Friday and Gannon. They plan on sitting back and enjoying the football game on TV at Gannon's house--but 1001 things come up that prevent them from getting any relaxation. Mostly it consists of neighbors interrupting because they seem to think that Gannon is their own personal policeman! You'll notice that Gannon is a bit "goofier" than normal--talking about inane things almost non-stop plus he never tells any of the neighbors 'no'. Throughout all this, Friday just sits back and takes it all in stride. So much for an evening of relaxation! While this is a particularly uneventful and somewhat dull episode, I am glad they did it because it humanized the police and shows a side of them you'll never see on other shows. So, it is a bit of a relief from the usual and not a bad change of pace.

By the way, you might notice that one of the many neighbors is Ann Morgan Guilbert--the woman who played Millie on "The Dick Van Dyke Show". Also note how Gannon takes out a criminal--tackling him like an action hero!