Bone Eater

Another Indian legend you never heard of before is let loose. As the name implies, this is a vengeful wraith who likes to absorb the skeletons of people while they're still using them. As usual, ancient burial grounds (can you say, "Poltergeist?") have been disturbed by clichéd greedy land developers building stuff.

The CGI, if it had been better, might have made the effect more treacherous looking, but they skimped on the budget, and it shows--to comical effect. The unleashed creature probably should have been kept off stage during its first several killings-that might have added some mystery or impending doom atmosphere-but the inept director decided to show us in the first five minutes what it looks like, and it wasn't impressive. The deaths are just poorly done, again with shoddy CGI. I guess ancient spirits always kill by using cheap special effects. As for the "victims," they look they're going to laugh any moment while they do goofy screams. It's always obvious who's going to get it: a character with only a few lines shows up, strange noises are heard, CGI dots fly, exit character. Repeat (several times).

Still, there's a few chase scenes featuring the monster that actually made this thing watchable. Unfortunately, the director seems to be using these as a device to fall back on (so it's used too often) when he can't think of anything else for his characters to do. Overall, it's pretty silly, but I've seen worse. This flick is cheap, but it's oddly fun to watch.

I'm not really sure where to begin. From start to finish, bad, stinky bad, like stepping into a port-a-john on a 100 degree day. If you force yourself to watch this as I did, keep some Vicodin handy for the pain. I will never understand how flicks this bad make it past the cutting room without the entire reel ending up on the floor. The movie is a cross between Gumby rides Pokey, meets the terminator, meets Wally Beaver playing cowboys and Indians without the cowboys. I've seen better animation in the original cut of the Blob. You will get more entertainment from watching Gone with the Wind while suffering from the puke and poops. Bad acting and hokey lines will have you squirming and wishing you had rented Peewee's big Top or watched every episode of Gilligan's Island back to back. UGH..I'm going to go slit my wrist now.

Following an accident at a local dig, a local sheriff finds that the series of incidents around town are the result of a released Native American demon through the construction project and must find a way of stopping its rampage through town.

This one wasn't all that bad of an effort but did have some flaws to it. Among the few good parts here is the relatively high body count featured here that really makes for quite a fun time here as there's a lot of rather enjoyable encounters throughout. The opening resurrection at the site where it massacres the workers is quite fun, as well as the sequence where it takes out the archaeological diggers, the ambush at the side road where it gets the couple by their truck and another rather fun attack as it appears and takes out a series of guards while dealing with the workers and the local tribe at the construction site which is quite fun with the mystical incantations against it as all of these scenes are really enjoyable. There's also the rather fun scenes here with the spirit chasing after the dirt-bikers on a ghostly steed across the desert dunes and a latter high-speed chase down the highway which is highly fun, cheesy action scenes that gives this some fun action moments. As well, the creature here could've been quite fun here as this has some potentially enjoyable aspects here with its imposing appearance made of bones assembled into a fine-looking beast complete with a crown of bones as well as some fine weaponry, a really unique and inventive backstory that ties it into the area and a pretty clever way of finally dealing with it for a pretty nice main creature here and ends up being what holds it up over the several flaws here. Among the film's biggest issues here is the fact that there's absolutely no blood or gore here as the creature's attacks are never given to include the chance for any by being portrayed as him disintegrating them into a cloud of mass. There's a speculation that it's turning the victims into bones but just vaporizing them into a vapor of smoke isn't that appealing anyway trying to showcase this, and given the high body count there's some chances here to really have had some fun with the creature like this and it's wholly disappointing. Another big flaw here is the lame and utterly ridiculous CGI on display, which is used on the creature to make it so cheap and unconvincing that despite the cool-looking appearance it comes off laughable that it was allowed to pass through and completed here as it's simply a non-stop series of the usually- associated tropes of the style. The only other part here that holds this back is the totally unrealistic and over-the-top manner of the businessman's attitude towards the tribe which borders on ludicrous with how he expects what's happening to the relics left there that are continually being dug up, forcing more to hide. Otherwise, this one was quite decent.

Rated PG-13: Violence and some Language.

All I can do is laugh. Wow. I like Jim Wynorski's movies, I really do. I mean, Chopping Mall is a classic. But this, what happened to this guy? He used to make funny horror movies, that tried to be good. But this was hardly even funny...I mean, I guess it was, because I laughed. The villain is incredible. I mean, horrible CGI. It looks...terrible. And the movie has no gore, and no nudity as redeeming qualities. It is rated PG-13. A movie named "Bone Eater" you know won't be a blockbuster movie, you know it probably won't have a smart script. A movie like this may rely on gore...but no. It doesn't rely on anything really, it's just...crap. Check it out if you want to laugh, though. But don't expect a good movie. I hope Jim Wynorski goes back to movies like Chopping Mall and Ghoulies IV, because this and Komodo Vs. Cobra ain't cutting it.

1986 brought us Chopping Mall from director Jim Wynorski, a classic in the genre. This here, Bone Eater won't be remembered. It contains a lot of very cheap and bad CGI but it's worth watching for the old thespians to see.

I guess that the budget went to the casting in stead of the effects. Main lead is by Bruce Boxleitner (Tron legacy (1982 and 2010)), but there are others to recogniz, Willam Katt from House (1986), Walter Koenig (from the Star Trak saga as Chekov),Veronica Hamel from Hill Street Blues (1981-1987) and Jim Storm from Dark Shadows (1966).

The story itself was rather okay and the acting was also okay but the CGI teared it into a funny flick. To give you an example of cheap effects, the earthquakes were done by shaky camera's and you could easily see that the trees weren't moving.

If you want to see the old brigade again than this is surely one to watch as a starter on a horror night with your pals. But if you think it will be a scary flick, forget it.

Gore 0/5 Nudity 0/5 Effects 0,5/5 Story 2/5 Comedy 0/5