It's My LiFe: hubby

Showing posts with label hubby. Show all posts

Friday, January 11, 2013

sad story...suami di luar sana, anda patut baca ini!

“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up. ♥

Saturday, November 3, 2012

tragedi oktober.

it's November!

welcome November. bulan kelahiranku. ehem:P

Goodbye October.

29/10/12.ISNIN.

cant forget that day.

nampak kereta ku itu?

ye.accident.isnin.29/10/12.jam 3.40 petang.OTW balik dari sekolah.di traffic light dekat Poliklinik Yuslina,taman cendana(dari kota masai ke Taman Bukit Dahlia).

segalanya berlaku dengan pantas. masa tu baru lampu merah kat traffic light. aku berhenti di lampu merah macam biasa. beberapa saat selepas itu..................DUMMMMMMMMM. kereta aku di hentam dari belakang dengan kuat menyebabkan kereta aku melanggar kereta depan. seriously, aku blur/binggung beberapa minit selepas dilanggar. Zaheen menangis dengan kuat pon aku still binggung. orang sekeliling ketuk pintu kereta aku pon aku tak peduli. what happened? Aku hilang ingatan sekejap!

keadaan kereta aku bahagian belakang.

kereta yg langgar kereta ku

kereta depan aku. tak teruk sgt, sebab jarak antara kereta aku ngan kereta die tak dekat sangat.

selepas beberapa minit, baru aku sedar, aku accident. baru aku dengar tangisan zaheen yang kuat itu. sian anak ibu:( of course zaheen terkejut sangat. aku tgk masa tu lidah zaheen berdarah sikit.maybe sebab tergigit ngan gigi. nasib zaheen duduk dalam baby car seat! aku pulak? perut aku terhentak ngan stereng.sakit dan senak ok! lepas tu aku terus cari handphone aku, call encik suami. tapi masa tu hp aku ada bunyi game yg zaheen main sebelum tu. aku terus call suami dlm keadaan yg terketar2 okay. malangnya encik suami pon tak dengar ape aku cakap disebabkan bunyi game pada hp dan encik suami sedang berada di dalam surau dan xde line sgt kat situ. hampa:( aku cancel call utk stopkan bunyi game yg bising itu. pas dah stop game tu, encik suami call balik dan aku bgtau aku accident. dilanggar dr belakang masa traffic light lampu merah. terkezut die:P pastu baru aku keluar kereta tengok keadaan kereta aku. ya allah,teruknya:( pastu org yg langgar aku tu minta maaf dan tanya aku ok x. you know what...yang langgar aku tu...seorang uncle berbangsa cina umur 76tahun ok. masa tu , tiga-tiga kereta yang terlibat masih kat tengah jalan. pastu untuk keselamatan semua kereta di pindahkan ke tepi jalan sebab bahaya kan bincang2 tepi jalan. aku dah tak boleh drive dah. pekerja workshop tolong alihkn kereta aku ke tepi jalan. pastu aku call mak aku, bgtau aku accident. sambil menangis:P mak aku desak gi hospital terus tp aku berkeras nk tunggu encik suami dulu.

pas encik suami dah sampai..baru aku rasa lega sikit. die la yang setelkan urusan eksiden tu. seriously aku taktau ape nak buat masa tu. hal insuran kete ,NCV ,repot polis bla bla bla sume aku taktau. yang pasti aku nak gi klinik terdekat dulu sebab aku tak rasa baby gerak, perut aku cam mengeras,aku sakit pinggang dan perut senak. nak jalan pon susah. nasib kakak encik suami pon datang cepat, die bawak aku gi klinik terdekat. cek kat situ,aku tak bleeding, dengup jantung baby ok dan uri tak berdarah. tapi baby tak gerak gak. doc kata better refer hospital kerajaan terdekat,HSI sebab kes hentakan kuat kat perut, baby kena pantau selama 48jam. sebab tak semestinya effect tu rasa serta merta. die amik masa gak. aku setuju la. risau ok kat baby:( masa kat klinik ni zaheen sibuk main mainan kat klinik tu. main buai, slide, toys.aktif dan ceria. die dah tak ingat kot ape yg berlaku tadi. maybe die pon taktau ape yg berlaku tadi. alhamdulillah syukur sangat zaheen takde pape.

zaheen.masa tgh cek up ngan doc.

kebetulan, mak mertua aku memang ada kat pasir gudang. kat rumah kakak iparku. die tolong jaga zaheen. so aku n encik suami bergegas ke IPD Seri Alam untuk buat report. kitorng yang last sampai sebab gi klinik dulu kan. yang lagi 2 org dah buat report dulu. yang aku geramnya.....esoknye bile beli report uncle yg langgar aku tu(yup,report polis kena beli.satu rm4.aku pon baru tau.), die boleh tipu cakap aku ni berhenti mengejut sebab tu die pon brek mengejut dan terlanggar kereta aku. gerammmmmmmmmmmmm sangattttt. mentang2 aku buat repot paling last, die boleh citer kat polis sesuka hati yeeeeeeeeeeee. kalau aku stop mengejut, dah lama kete depan aku pon teruk gak. ni kete depan aku tak jejas sangat ponnn. GERAM. TAK SUKE DENGAN ORANG PEMBOHONG MACAM TU. DAH SALAH NGAKU JE LAH SALAH. NAK BUAT CITE BOHONG PULAK.tapi apepon, memang die yang bersalah pon walaupon die buat report camtu, kete blakang yang bersalah. so kete aku claim insuran kete die.


kete dpn aku. tak teruk sangat kan?

pas buat report, terus gi HSI. kena masuk bilik saringan bahagian O&G. serius seriau. teringat last kat situ masa nak bersalinkan zaheen. nasib dapat doc perempuan,xde lah malu sangat. dan nasib takde sesi seluk menyeluk untuk cek bukaan. heh. alhamdulillah, aku n baby ok....baby pon ada gerak2 banyak kali masa tengah ctg tu. maybe baby pon terkejut after accident. aku boleh balik tapi still kena pantau pergerakan baby. nasib tak kena tahan ward ok. alhamdulillah sangat baby takde pape. aku je sakit badan, ada lebam2 sikit dan rasa cam nak demam.

bile teringat balik accident tu...aku bersyukur sangat aku,zaheen dan baby dalam perut takde pape...terima kasih ya allah...mungkin ada hikmah disebalik apa yang terjadi...lepas kejadian tu, aku jadi trauma nak drive. masih teringat2 apa yang berlaku. lagi2 masa malam hari kejadian, aku tak boleh tidur. banyak kali cium zaheen, bersyukur die takde pape.banyak kali usap perut,cakap ngan baby. sesungguhnya aku sayang sangat kat anak-anakku. syukur sangat pada Allah...kalau tengok keadaan kete aku teruk kan..lagi2 kat belah zaheen sebenarnya. sebab uncle tu ada cuba nak mengelak gak...dah la..tak tau nak cakap ape lagi dah.. aku tulis kat blog ni pon sekadar untuk kenangan buat diri aku..maklum la pertama kali eksiden. harap ini yang pertama dan terakhir. taknak lagi dahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh:( mintak jauh lah semua2 tu. semoga keluarga ku sentiasa dibawah lindungan-Nya..Amin... terima kasih kepada semua yang mendokan keselamatan kami..yang membantu ku secara langsung dan tidak langsung. terima kasih sangat2:) oh ye, kereta aku kena masuk 'icu' selama 2 bulan. doakan kereta aku dapat dibaiki dengan cepat sebelum aku bersalin ye;)