:|

Nurul Fitrah understands that she cannot control other peoples actions, but she can control hers

She will keep her promises, even though other people give up or break theirs .

He knows, and He will lead

I have your face smiling at me in my mind
I have your name and words engraved in my heart
And I live on with just that

***

and someday, everything will all make perfect sense.

Death

Im stunned, life is sooo short...

Each year that passes means a year less from our lifetime, it bringing us closer to our death, and with each passing year, each passing month, each passing day, each passing second, we are much more closer to that inevitable event. The day when we going to meet our Lord, the day that we will have to stand in front of Him and answers Him, to every action that we did.

How can we  make same mistake again and again?

Each time we said that we love God, we are lying, because we keep on doing the same mistake again and again. You wont want to hurt someone you love many times would you? we are all hypocrites..but because of His unconditional loves to us, despite of the things that we do, Allah says this in His love letters:

Say: "O my Servants who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah. for Allah forgives all sins: for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

***

I used to uphold this principle ; " If you want to do something go ahead, but make sure that when God ask you why you did that, you have the answer for Him"

too bad, not following it now anymore shall stick to it back..

***

This guy, he just passed away yesterday. I was so shocked when I woke up yesterday. He was a few years older than me. Read his blog when Kak Annur introduced it to me last year.

He was a medical doctor, suffered from cancer. Throughout his life, he was so determined, and never stop hoping in Allahs plans.

He left a legacy, a footprint in everyone's heart. His story was amazing and inspiring. We can say that he ended his life with husnul khatimah, insyaAllah..

His death reminded me of my cousin, he died when he was 23 years old, one year older than my age now.He was so young. I was in first year during that time. I was so shocked when I got the news. It takes time for me to get a grip, the impact was so big. When Mama died, I was well prepared of it, well at least after two death in a row, you'll get immune to death (although there are few things that I regretted).

So how long do we have before we died? we never knew. At least Mas Afzal, he knew that his time was short. My cousin, I believed that, the day before, he didn't know that he wont be able to taste another tomorrow.

I bet most of us are confidence that we will stay alive tomorrow, that's why we arrogantly keep on making mistakes today. May Allah have mercy on our souls.

to live well or  to live hell, we choose.. 

life is short, invest it wisely..

we cannot change our past, but we can change our present and future..

Tuesdays with Morrie #1 : living with deaths shadow

Accept what you are able to do and what you are not able to do.

Accept the as past as past, without denying it or discarding it.

Learn to forgive yourself and to forgive others.

Don't assume that it's to late to get involved.

Rules

Rule #1: Do not love someone who doesn't love you

Rule #2: Do not waste energy on someone who doesn't really care for you

Rule #3: Choose wisely, ONLY let the correct person in.

Rule #4: Bear in mind that, everytime people made promises, there is 99% possibility that they will not be fulfilled.

Rule #5: Don't sacrifice yourself, neither you principal.

Rule #6: When making a decision, put what God favours in front

Rule #7: Bear in mind that every decisions that you make, will affect others. DON'T be selfish, add a bit of empathy.

Rule #8: Don't ever blame others for the decision that you made. Blame yourself, the decision maker.

Rule #9: We cannot control other peoples actions and thoughts, but we can control ours.

Rule #10: When giving, give the very best that you can give to others. expect less.

Rule #11: Keep your promises. Think of what will happen if you are in that person shoes. At least try to uphold it to the very best that you can.

Rule #12: Do not give false promises.

Rule #13:Treat people the way you want to be treated. Treat others the way they treated you. oh wait, actually both is applicable..at least now

owh! I cannot sleeppppppppppppppppppp

.

gave up.

I myself, can do nothing..

I have done all I can, now the ball is in your court

serve it, return it, play!

or

just stare at it, and do nothing. act as if you dont see the ball.

opt for the second choice arent you?

llalalaa~

Boys are stupid,
some men too,
throw rocks at them,
pots and pans too..

HAHAH..especially those joining that thing >.<

Saved a wretch like me

He picked me up when I fell down..

Allah engkau dekat penuh kasih sayang
Takkan pernah engkau biarkan hamba-Mu menangis
Karna kemurahan-Mu
Karna kasih sayang-Mu

Hanya bila diri-Mu
Ingin nyatakan cinta
Pada jiwa yang rela dia kekasih-Mu
Kau selalu terjaga yang memberi segala

Allah Rahman Allah Rahim
Allahu Ya Ghafar Ya Nurul Qolbi
Allah Rohman Allah Rahim
Allahu Ya Ghafar Ya Nurul Qolbi

Di setiap nafas di segala waktu
Semua bersujud memuji memuja asma-Mu
Kau yang selalu terjaga yang memberi segala

:(

Life is short, invest it wisely..another year, mean a step closer to death..Happy new year, acknowledge the passing time, and take time to reflect on ourselves..

clueless

both of you are living under each others shadows

and I feel insecure

whatever lah

Follow The Light

While watching Follow The Light yesterday:

Me: Can Jesus talk when he was a baby?

Nasha: No

Me: Owh, in our version, he can

***

While Still in the Cradle

One of the miracles mentioned in the Quran, although not mentioned in the Bible, is that fact that Jesus, while still in the cradle, spoke out to protect his mother Mary from any accusations people may have placed on her due to having a child without a father. When she was approached about this strange incident after her childbirth, Mary merely pointed to Jesus, and he miraculously spoke, just as God had promised her upon annunciation.

"He shall speak to people while still in the cradle, and in manhood, and he shall be from the righteous." (Quran 3:46)

Jesus said to the people:
"I am indeed a slave of God. He has given me the Book and made me a Prophet, and He has made me blessed wherever I may be. And He has enjoined upon me prayers, and to pay the alms, as long as I live and (He has made me) kind to my mother, and He has not made me insolent, unblessed. And may Peace be upon me the day I was born, and the day I die, and on the Day I shall be raised to life." (Quran 19:30-33)

Source: Read the comment below

***

A beautiful story once told about a girl name Mary ( Maryam)

In the play, Juwita Suwito acts as The Virgin Mary..in fact it is quite similar to what the Quran says, but I don't think Mary in the Quran,was married to a guy name Joseph :s

Prophet Muhammad named Mary as the best women who ever lived;

"The best women of the world are four: Mary the daughter of Heli, Aasiyah the wife of Pharaoh, Khadeejah bint Khuwaylid (The wife of the Prophet Muhammad), and Fatimah, the daughter of the Muhammad, the Messenger of God." (Al-Tirmidhi)

Her Birth

When the wife of Imran said:

"O my Lord! I have vowed to You what is in my womb [my child] to be dedicated to Your services, so accept this [my vow] from me. Verily, All-Hearer, the All-Knowing."

Then when she delivered her she said:

"O my Lord! I have delivered a female child' - and Allah knew better what she delivered - 'And the male is not like the female, and I have named her Maryam and I seek refuge with You for her and for her offspring from Satan, the outcast. " (Quran 3:35-36)

The wife of Imran, and mother of Mary, out of her devotion to God vowed to dedicate the child in her womb to the sacred service of God and asked God to accept her vow. Her hopes were in a male child who will be brought up to service the places of worship and be dedicated to serve God. Delivering a female child, she realized that things did not go according to her plan, but decided to fulfill her vow, and Maryam was the name of the child. And she made a prayer for her newly born asking God to protect her and her offspring from Satan. The verses following described the response of God to the vow and to the prayer of the mother:

"So her Lord accepted her [Maryam] with good acceptance." (Quran 3:37).

Her Upbringing

Quran verses 3:37 continue;

"So her Lord accepted her with good acceptance. He made her grow in a good manner and put her under the care of Zachariya. Every time he entered Al-Mihrab (the praying place) to visit her, he found her supplied with sustenance [food]. He said:

'O Maryam! From where have you got this?' She said:
'This is from Allah. Verily, Allah provides sustenance who He wills, without limit.' "

So Mary was accepted by God, and was brought up in a good manner after she was put under the care of Zachary. Through her devotion and righteous upbringing and the prayer from her mother, Mary became the best woman to ever live as depicted in the Quran in the verses 3:42:

"And (remember) when the angels said: 'O Maryam (Mary)! Verily, Allah (God) has chosen you, purified you (from polytheism and disbelief), and chosen you above the women of the world (of her lifetime).' "

Mary Receives a Visit

In the19th chapter of the Quran (which is called Maryam) Mary receives a visitor from God:

"And mention in the Book, Maryam [i.e. mention, O Mohammed, in the Quran the story of Mary], when she withdrew from her family to a place facing east. She placed a screen from them; then We sent to her our angel (Jibrael, or Gabriel), and he appeared before her in the form of a man in full human form. She said:

'I seek refuge with The Most Beneficent [God] from you, if you do fear Him.' (The angel) said:

'I am only a Messenger from your Lord, (to announce) to you the gift of a righteous son.' She said:

'How can I have a son, when no man has touched me, nor am I unchaste?' He (the angel) said:

'So (it will be), your Lord said: 'That is easy for Me: And to appoint him as a sign to mankind and a mercy from Us (from God)', and it is a matter (already) decreed (by God).' " (Quran 19:16-21)

In these verses, it is described how the pious virgin Mary is visited by angel Gabriel, who appears before her in a form of a man. Not knowing who he is, she fears for herself, but he asserts to her that he is an angel, a Messenger from her Lord, and announces to her news of her miraculous conception of a son. In shock, she questions, affirming her chastity. The angel answers that such a conception, though miraculous, is easy for The Lord, all He needs to say is "Be." and it is. And that these are matters decreed by Him, for greater purposes and to the benefit of mankind.

The Miracle

And then, miraculously, Mary becomes pregnant. The emotional story of her pregnancy follows:

"So she conceived him, and she withdrew with him to a far place . And the pains of childbirth drove her to the trunk of a date-palm. She said:

'Would that I had died before this, and had been forgotten and out of sight!' Then a call unto her from bellow, said:

'Grieve not! Your Lord has provided a water stream under you; And shake the trunk of the date-palm towards you, it will let fall fresh ripe dates upon you. So eat and drink and be glad, and if you see any human being, say:

'Verily! I have vowed a fast unto the Most Beneficent so I shall not speak to any human being this day.' " (Quran 19:22-26)

From these versus one mentally pictures Mary, driven out of town, out of sight to Bethlehem valley 4-6 miles from Jerusalem, in the pain of labor, and in fear of what is going to happen to her. It is her first child, she has no husband. What will her people, the Jews, say? What will they do? How will she react? With all that, she wishes that she was dead, but the God who gave her the miracle, the God to Whom she worshipped, to Whom she devoted her life, did not forsake her. A voice came from beneath her, soothing and comforting her, and guiding her. And when she gave birth, the voice instructed her not to speak or explain, but make a vow of silence and everything will workout.

"Then she brought him (the baby) to her people, carrying him. They said:

'O Maryam! Indeed you have brought a thing which is greatly evil! O sister of Haron (i.e. O you who we consider the like of Haron, who was a pious man at the time of Mary)! Your father was not a bad man (adulterous), nor was your mother an unchaste woman.' Then she pointed to him (to the baby). They said:

'How can we talk to one who is a child, in the cradle?' " (Quran 19:27-29)

Mary gives birth to the child, and takes him back to her village. And there Mary meets the Jews. Upon seeing her with her baby, they are struck. In their eyes, she has done a heinous crime. Their argument was: 'How could you do something so evil! We always considered you a model person of piety, and you come from a pious family -- known and respected!'. But Mary obeys the commands of her Lord. She is quiet and points to the baby.

Source

***

The musical was good and I enjoyed it.You should go watch it too!

Separuh jiwaku pergi

 

I like this part :) 

"Benar ku mencintaimu
Tapi tak begini
Kau khianati hati ini
Kau curangi aku"

cause you can really feel the pain that he is dealing with. hehe.

This song was wrote to KD after she dump Anang the husband for another guy. Anyway there always two sides of story..and this is his.

I think KD also wrote a song as a reply to this one, not sure which song, will try to search for it :P

 

Betrayed

Concealing truth is a lie

 

Half truth is a lie

 

One lie will lead to another lies

 

You will keep on telling lies once you started lying

 

and thats what you did and do

 

What secrets are you trying to hide anyway?

 

Thats why I dont give a damn to believe what you said anymore

 

Yes, you dont worth my trust anymore

 

I trusted you

but I cannot blame you, can I?

as you already told me that you are hopeless, and a bad person

so who should i blame then?

maybe myself

 

***

 

One thing that you should know is, everytime you tell lies, i will know the other side of the story  :) and when i keep quite, dont mean, i dont know anything, i just want to see how u act. Im quite impressive, you are really good in it :) Congrats

 

***

I was wrong, I thought you deserve a chance, but too bad you like  to screw things when people give you a chance.

 

anyway all the best in life!

 

I  hope to see you change, I really do

Ham sap?

STOP: If you are a goody2 type, don't read this post, u might not like it

Last night, some weird yahoo id add, me and I approved. This morning, I woke up, turn on my laptop and signed in my yahoo messenger and tadaaa~!

noemiehulon369: Hey U!
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: ?
noemiehulon369: Hello there.. My name is Jennifer.. Got ur ID through Messenger Directory
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: ok
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: another spam huh?
noemiehulon369: I love chatting with new people.. Would you like to chat today? Where are you from?
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: u spam
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: stay away from me >.<
noemiehulon369: nah, I am a vegetarian...  no spam for me! haha
noemiehulon369: Nice Im 22 years old i'm going to school in Houston.. Can i ask you a question?
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: no you cant
noemiehulon369: Do you like big booty girls with big tits? lol seriously cuz thats what i am/have..Is that too much for you to handle?
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: YES, you are spam ;P

***

So when I type spam, she will reply: nah, I am a vegetarian...  no spam for me! haha
look like this spam, detected the word spam pretty well ;) SPAM..SPAM..SPAM

***
noemiehulon369: nah, I am a vegetarian...  no spam for me! haha
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: spam
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: spam
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: I lOVE it
noemiehulon369: nah, I am a vegetarian...  no spam for me! haha

***here we go again :P***

noemiehulon369: so yea i'm lonely would you like to have some kinky fun? Would you like to see me?
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: YES
noemiehulon369: ok but i have no pictures on my computer.. but i have a video camera connected
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: ok
noemiehulon369 is typing...
noemiehulon369: ok let me set up my camera for you baby i hope your ready for some booty shots..

~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: im always ready

*** and HAHHAA finally she revealed herself!***

noemiehulon369: lol ok goto *link* we can go 1 on 1 chat. Just click join at the top of the webpage.~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: im shy
noemiehulon369: Don't worry baby its free to join this site all you have to do is register
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: owh, i dont want to register
noemiehulon369: fill out your cc info baby for Age verification ONLY, your card will not be charged.. ok i'm ready for u now
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: are you sure?
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: what r u wearing now?
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: hmmm
noemiehulon369: What color Panties do you think i should wear? i might have you favorite color here somewhere...
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: red
noemiehulon369: I'll do anything you want me to do.. Do you see me?  I can't chat with you on the site till you register
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: you are not real
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: i want real thing...duh
noemiehulon369: yes im real
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: can i kiss you?
noemiehulon369: well, im kinda shy but ok, Muah
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~:  :*:*:*
noemiehulon369: Baby I'm So Horny right now! Do Whatever You have to, to get in! i'll spank my ass till its red for u!!!
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: anyway
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: im a girl
noemiehulon369 is typing...
noemiehulon369: so? you've never fantasized about being with another girl? check me out im hot *link again*click the yellow JOIN FREE button at the top of the page, its 100% free to join
noemiehulon369: Your such a good boy, i'm gonna show you what good boys deserve.. i'll be waiting for you on the site...

***

and I tried to type many other words, to see what this thing can detect

***
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: im a boy
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: baby, why dont you on ur messenger webcam
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: we can chat here
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~:
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: you ignored me
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~:
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: guy
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: darling
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: dear
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~:
~*NuRuL-FItRaH*~: sighh..

***

HAHAH, and she didn't reply after that..I guess she's tired of me

***

Why people invented this thing? Why would some fall for this stupid thing? Temptations huh?

SPAM, you are smart, and getting smarter everyday..but somehow, you cannot fool us..too bad >.< 

If you are a spammer, PLEASE change you email password  

PS: Too much free time make you do crazy things >.<

-

Tell me that there is no strings attached

If not, STAY AWAY

NO ENTRY : it is closed tightly

Surviving

Things that keep me alive

.Sudoku.

.Ben Bradshaw.

.Cat Stevens songs.

.Ucops advice.

.Zatis encouragements.

.Ben and Nasha.

.Juin.

.Zilahs phone call.

.Family.

.The Most Gracious & Merciful.

"Besides Jihad al-Qital fi Sabilillaah, the hardest kind of struggle is to 'remain positive' because it requires you to disbelieve what you see and perceive everything from a totally different angle. Struggle to believe that the pink thing is actually an elephant! Only Aqeedah in Qadha' and Qadar will help you so"-Ustaz Hasrizal

Random #8

Pungguk akan sentiasa rindukan bulan

tapi

bulan, tidak sesekali akan jatuh ke riba

ironi..

Cat Stevens transition to Yusuf Islam; Between Fame and Faith

Cat Stevens transition to Yusuf Islam

***

Tears dropped while watching. Really deep (at least for me)

After 22 years of life, being a Muslim, I have done nothing.

***

He was Cat Stevens

and he is Yusuf Islam.

He gave up on fame, for faith.

***

OK, I think im falling in love!

Enjoy :)

Maybe, one day..

.You are too cute.

.Temptation.

.I cannot resist it.

.Can I buy you?.

.You are too expensive.

.Couldn't afford YOU :(.

.OK, maybe I shall try again for the next few years

and now, im closing the book, and will open it back.

May tomorrow be a better day..

Now I realised that too many people care for me.

I shall be contented and happy.

I will.I will.I will

Thank You!

nothing is what it seems

 

for goodness sake please stop, it is not fun, it hurts even more when you guys keep on teasing me..

***

people will always see the good side of you and how not contented am I

I don't mind, im ok with it really..

Some would say that I didn't value the friendship, but its ok and I will always remember the good side of you, always

***

Part of me don't want to remember anything, and another half of it is missing you badly..

Padan muka -suits me very well >.<

Other than sudoku, I have a new hobby, which is reading ym and msn history.. I think you should one day read it too.[ if you ever keep it]

***

and you are getting tired, time is proving that im correct..reality bites

Sudoku

Thanks to juin, now I have my own sudoku book! Yey!

Cant wait to meet it >.<

When your best friend leaves you..

EMPTY.

no message, no phone call.

no one chasing.

keep on walking..

T-T

PS if only you would stay

Future that we never knew..

Big girl don't cry

*smile*

Be contented, God will always has great plans for us :)

Optimistic + Husnul zhon to God = Incredible outcomes

Falling

I'm digging my hole deeper, and if I fall down, I will be in a great pain..

***

Ben, says I wont be able to do it, neither do I myself have confidence that I can manage to go through that..

but again, it is the best solution, at least at the moment..

***

Im the one child in my family. I don't like sharing stuffs with other people. I don't share my thoughts and feelings with others as well..neither do I like to share my loves with anyone.

***

and yes, I learn my lessons the hard ways..

***

aint this quote nice

"The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all"

PS: I think Im falling, can you save me?

Why..why..WHY!

Why books are so expensive????

Even sudoku books are expensive..

Can anyone please kindly buy me a sudoku book? Pleulishhhhhhhhhhh.. Boredom is killing me

Random #7

changing for good is not a crime but it costs hell as a manner of speaking

a change.transition.turning point

-versus-

Random #6

Shouldnt try from the beginning..
maybe im not good enough for you..

Was it you?

I met you last year at Mid Valley

I still remember your hair..your  dress..things that you said..

but

I cant recall your face, neither your name

Was it you?

Maybe I would never knew the answer.sigh

Edited : >.<

Call me a social recluse. Stay away..

Thank you  

**a sms which lead to a random post**

PS: Im not interested

and I begin to realise it..

After A While

After a while, you learn the subtle difference
Between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning
And company doesn't mean security,

And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts.
And presents aren't promises,
And you begin to accept your defeats
With the grace of God, not the grief of a child,

And you learn to build all your roads on today
Because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans,
And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight
And after a while you learn

That even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul,
Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.

And you learn that you really can endure ...
That you really are strong
And you really do have worth
And you learn and learn ...
And with every goodbye, you learn.

 

By Veronica A. Shoffstall

Good memories, shall remain forever.

Was looking through my HD and found  this..

People said- -Good friends remain forever.

Is it true? Well hopefully

This was taken 1 and half years ago

***

Starring : Me and Tim

Script writer/Cameraman/Producer/Director : Ben

It cost less then RM10 to make this short video ( the cost of 3 glass of three layers tea..haha)

In the spirit of 1Malaysia, when it was first introduced..(now none of us really like the 1Malaysia thingy..I think)

Enjoy  

***

Take one

Take two

 

PS: Kat mana Zilah masa ni eyh?

He prayed!

Your 'God'  really knows how to pray..

³⁶ Then Jesus went with his disciples to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to them, "Sit here while I go over there and pray." ³⁷.He took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled³⁸.  Then he said to them, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me."³⁹.  Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will." ⁴⁰.  Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. "Could you men not keep watch with me for one hour?" he asked Peter.
⁴¹.  "Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak." ⁴². He went away a second time and prayed, "My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done."
43.  When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy.^44.  So he left them and went away once more and prayed the third time, saying the same thing.⁴⁵.  Then he returned to the disciples and said to them, "Are you still sleeping and resting? Look, the hour is near, and the Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners.

Do you pray the way he did?

To think again, why is he praying if he is God? @_@

T-T

If only deleting memories are as easy as pressing the delete button on the keyboard.

***

is it worth crying this much?

***

You'll never understand,
Because you don't want to,
If you took the time to look inside,
You'd see how many tears really pass through these eyes,
How many times I've tried to scream for help and no one has heard,
How much it hurts when you overlook me like I'm not good enough,
And how I have to try not to fall apart,
When nothing's right and everything's wrong,
If you really looked,
You'd see how much I really loved you,
And how much I really miss you,
How much I try to keep it together,
When I'm consumed by grief,
I really wish you'd try,
Try, for heaven's sake,
That's all I ask,
If you saw the real me,
You'd feel remorse,
Because, between you,
It's you that's made me like this,
Twisted up inside,
So so angry,
And sad, too sad for words,
A tear is sliding down my soft cheeks,
I don't brush it away and try to compose myself,
Why wipe my tears if I still want to cry?
Why give up if I still want to try?
So, I won't give up trying,
Not quite yet,
You've won the battle but you'll never win the war,
I'll try and make you see,
Make you see what you've turned me into,
Only then will I be able to go on,
Please understand,
It's all I ask...

Amber Millar

***

I miss home, can i stop working and go back to penang? like tomorrow please?

Life is complicated..hm?

I dont want to see my friends falling apart from each other :(

Its affecting me so much this week as i listened to many heartbreaking stories..

but everyone has their own choice, whether to make things work or not, it relies on them..kan?

wishing for the best..

Self-realization :

1. what matter is not what you gain, but what you have to offer or give..and low expectation will help you to accept the person the way they are..but to be able to give without expecting, you need a STRONG heart.

2. changes are the constant things that happen in human life. You may lost something in the process, but as we put our trust and faith in God, one thing for sure, there is light at the end of the tunnel..

When sorry become meaningless

There are things inside me that need improvement..

and I need to work on my ego..really..

ah and maybe stubbornness too

***

I always think that sorry may be the hardest thing to say, but if it is said without any action backing it, it is of no use..it become meaningless..

Self reflection : Dont just say sorry because people would not know how sorry your are.Show that you are changing the situation.

***

Sigh

I'm sorry :(

Random #5

Who am i to you?

***

Something isn't right
I can feel it again feel it again
This isn't the first time
That you left me waiting
Sad excuses and false hopes high
I saw this coming still I don't know why
I let you in

I knew it all along
It's so predictable
I knew something would go wrong (something's always wrong)
So you don't have to call
Or say anything at all
It's so predictable (so predictable)

So take your empty words your broken promises
And all the time you stole cause I am done with this
I can give it away give it away
I'm doing everything I should've
And now I'm making a change
I'm living the day
I'm giving back what you gave me
I don't need anything

I knew it all along
It's so predictable
I knew something would go wrong (something's always wrong)
So you don't have to call
Or say anything at all
It's so predictable (so predictable)

Everywhere I go
Everyone I meet
Every time I try to fall in love
They all wanna know why I'm so broken
Why am I so cold
Why I'm so hard inside.
Why am I scared
What am I afraid of
I don't even know
This story's never had an end
I've been waiting
I've been searching
I've been hoping
I've been dreaming you would come back
But I know the ending of this story
You're never coming back
Never..never..never..never.....[echo].....

I knew it all along
It's so predictable
I knew something would go wrong (something's always wrong)
So you don't have to call
Or say anything at all
It's so predictable (so predictable)
Everywhere I go for the rest of my life (so predictable)
Everyone that I love
Everyone I care about
They're all gonna wanna know what's wrong with me (so predictable)
And I know what it is
I'm ending this right now..

Good Charlotte

***

am i? NO, i cant

***

stupid or too optimistic?

***

do you really want it? i doubt u, prove that im wrong if you still want to make things work

***

i miss abah :(

Random#4

Hm, how can people cause pain and act normally, like nothing had ever happened?

Weird..

PS Being responsible and show that you cares will at least cease the pain ( i think)

T-T

Guess the old lame excuse is still valid sometimes

A: Kenapa suara lain

B: Owh, selsema.

Insanity

Sometime I wish, when Im crossing a road, a car would hit me..

and...I can stop breathing for a moment or maybe forever.

Test

I think I'm failing the test called Life :(

Something need to be done before the marks dropped until it couldn't be saved anymore. Perhaps it is time when following God's will is more important than following your heart..

I believe in this;

"But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not" Al-Baqarah : 216

but somehow, my mind and heart refused to think rationally..haih

Note to self :Please search for eternal happiness here and hereafter. If it doesn't bring glory to God, break it. PLEASE

PS: Needs motivation

Random #3

The last five days have been torturous.

To know it  during first day of raya make it more pathetic.

Trying to deny it make things harder.

I think im killing myself from within, dramatic huh?

Cuba untuk berserah (tawakal) tanpa sebarang usaha untuk memperbaiki keadaan. langgar sunnahtullah, tapi mengharapkan yang terbaik. jenayah!

The first it and the second it are two different things yet can be one thing

Adios

1.I love the way YOU lie :) Keep up the good work! :)

2. Liars can really make you believe them, they deserve chances, but they just dont know how to appreciate the chances that people gave.

3.Well maybe we should stay away from this kind of people for their selfishness aite!

4.A friend once said and i quote "Bila kita rasa orang tu membawa kerosakan kepada agama kita, kadang-kadang kita perlu jauhkan diri dari orang macam ni" TRUE, now i really agree with this statement. But again dont put a blame on others for the wrong doing that we done :)

ADIOS friend!

fate

"You have the choice to choose who walks into your life, but you DO NOT have the power to make a person stay"

Random #2

Certain mistakes are irreversible

Hm..

Do you feel there is a difference between being in love and being in lust?

Can both co-exist?

Dunia #1

ah, di dunia ini kedapatan dua golongan manusia.

yang melakukan kerosakan, dan kemudian menghilang begitu sahaja.

dan

yang melakukan kerosakan, dan cuba memulihkan keadaan

***

di dunia ini juga wujudnya dua golongan manusia

yang memaafkan tetapi tidak melupakan atau orang bisa panggil mereka sebagai bijaksana

dan

yang memaafkan serta melupakan dan mereka terkenal dengan panggilan naif

tapi

saya mahu percaya selama-lamanya bahawa setiap orang itu HARUS diberi peluang, kedua..ketiga..keepat..atau kelima dan seterusnya..tidak kira berapa banyak kali silapnya diulang..

kerna

kita ini manusia, bisa terlupa dan Tuhan itu Maha Pengampun.Tidak mungkin kita bisa bernafas di bumi ini, jika Tuhan tidak memaafkan dan tidak memberi peluang.

tetapi

sampai bila maaf dan peluang mahu dibiarkan hancur dan berkecai atas sifat angkuh dan tidak bersyukurnya segelingtir golongan manusia ini?

***

aku manusia yang punya tahap kesabaran yang tidak terlalu tinggi

Nota 1: Kata-kata maaf sahaja tidak bisa mengubat luka yang dalam.

What does this mean?!!!

You know what? I'm just about to message someone that I HATE YOU.. but guess what happened? My simcard suddenly not working! HUH! It was working pretty well 2 minutes before! grrrrrr

I thought my phone is not working. So I tried to use Ibu's simcard and put it in my phone and it's working well.

Is God trying to stop me from sending the message? Well I don't care I just going to send the message to make myself feel better. ISH.I'm off to MAXIS centre.. Hope I could find one..

PS: Note to self: Please be patient.Hilang pahala puasa.banyak sudah. haih

Bookshelves

I want to make bookshelves for my room. Still thinking what the design should be..

and..how am I going to do it. It been ages since I last use all the tools.

This better work, or my level of depression will increase. HAHA

PS: Need to keep myself busy..so that I wont think too much.

past vs Future

Everybody's has their own secrets.

Everybody's got something they had to leave behind.

We CANNOT change our past.

But we can learn to be a better someone in the future.

 

PS : Ajar saya untuk maaf kan diri sendiri?

i'm sorry

I'm being selfish and self centered for these two months. I've been thinking ONLY about myself.

Not thinking about God,

Not thinking about Islam

Not thinking about Muhammad

Not thinking about brothers and sisters in Islam

Not thinking about friends

And not thinking about YOU, yes YOU..

***

I'm sorry..

***

Muhammad SAW told us once:

"You will not enter paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another.." (Muslim)

I believe

Even if someone hurts my feelings

I'll keep running toward the light

Even if I trip, fall and cry my eyes out,

I still believe..

Although it may seem silly..

I believe in tomorrow

I believe in His plan

 

PS- I need Kobato. to heal my broken heart

sigh

stupid me

=(

 

Sedih dengan diri sendiri yang kurang berjiwa besar sejak akhir-akhir ni :( :(

Mahu kembali normal, meniti hidup yang normal seperti selalu.

End is approaching.Final Lap

Finals coming soon..

6 papers..

22 nd April till 5th May..

Mujahid cakap..

"Doing your best is more important than being the best"

ah, so true..*akak baru je nak rest jap b4 dapat msg ni, then terus bangun..bila dapat..hahaha*

All the best everyone! Gambatteh!

Moga tak  ada orang yg terjatuh atau luka, doakan kami :)

Cuba mencari.

Cuba mencari hikmah dari apa yang telah berlaku..

I wish I could get the answer straight away from Him.

Kalau lah masa boleh diulang kembali, akan dipastikan ia tidak berlaku..

Kesilapan yang akan tertanggung seumur hidup.mungkin =(

Saya yang dalam keraguan, moga Allah beri kekuatan. Sudah rebah, dan susah berusaha untuk bangun kembali dengan mencari hikmah yang tersembunyi. low self esteem. Doakan!

.

I HATE SELFISH PEOPLE!

arghhh!

Are we being faithful?

Good morning everyone!

I was reading for today's test and something came across my mind.

Can you imagine being unfaithful to your partner? (partner as in husband or wife)

Some people define being unfaithful to their partners by cheating.

I define unfaithful by putting something not in it's place =not being 'adil

Can you imagine telling your husband/wife :~

1. You are not my first love.

2. I've kissed someone before (indicate that she/he is not ur 1st kiss)

3. Someone touched me before, im not virgin.

and the list goes on.

Ouch

If we marry that person, the story might end there,but what if we marry someone else?

Just imagine how unfaithful we are to our partners.

Someone once said

" Tak thrill la hidup kalau tak penah couple"

well if this has came across in ur mind, please think back what is the purpose of ur life.

Well, if u've done anything like above, please remember that Allah will always love us, and if we repent, He will definite forgive us..

Allah will always have mercy on us, but do we have mercy to ourselves, do we have mercy to people around us?

The chances to change will always there, we should decide, what kind of person we want to be.

PLEASE remember, that we( human) always make mistakes, but how much lesson do we learn from each mistake that we've done?Remember that Allah is the One that will always love us no matter what.

Everything happen for reason.

I need to change and so do you.

PS: I better get back to book, doakan saya!

I'm a sinner

Orang cakap,

"Apa yang kita lakukan sekarang, bakal memberi impak atau mencorakkan kehidupan kita pada masa akan datang"

Saya semakin takut dengan kata-kata ini.

Orang cakap,

Kalau kita melihat orang yang jahil, anggaplah dia lebih mulia dari kita , kerana dia berbuat sesuatu kesalahan atau dosa kerana kejahilannya sedang kita berbuat dosa dalam keadaan kita mengetahuinya.

Dan, saya semakin dihantui dengan kenyataan di atas.

sighs. Im a sinner, Faghfirlana Ya Allah.

Membuang masa

3rd day at home :)

done nothing.great!

jasad dekat rumah, minda melayang2 ke mana entah.sigh.

hope for a better tomorrow..? hmmm

Random #1

" Buat keputusan kena fikir betul-betul, sebab setiap keputusan yang kita ambil tu akan effect kehidupan kita masa akan datang"-Kak Miza

When making a decision, a lot of stuffs should be considered.

Pilihan 1

Follow the flow and enjoy it.

Akibat

Mengundang marah pemilik hati, tapi diri sendiri gembira dan orang lain pon gembira. Tapi, kesudahannya tak pasti juga

Pilihan 2

Repent and stop, pray hard

Akibat

Pemilik hati tak marah, diri sendiri dan orang lain?

Bila kita dalam situasi yang mana, apa yang kita nak almost impossible untuk terjadi, apa pilihan yang akan kita buat?

***

I repent, and I shall stop.

Only You can grant my wish

I shall pray hard.

***

My Lord,

If You grant my wish, I shall say Alhamdulillah.

If not, I know that You know what best for me and I shall accept it.

p/s : I'm sorry, it is not easy too :( :(

p/p/s: will take a step back, in searching the truth, and may He leads me to the right path. thabit qulubana 'ala dinik. ameen

Perbincangan bersama Naib Canselor

Assalamualaikum,

Pertemuan bersama dengan Naib Canselor, pihak PTM dan TNC HEPA bersama dengan mahasiswa yang diwakili oleh, Ridzuan, Ayuni, Hafiz Ilyas, Fadzil, Syahida, Shafie Hashim, Shazni Munir, Izuddin, Syazwan, KFC, Tim, Ben dan saya.

Diakhir perbincangan, kamu semua bersetuju bahawa, permasalahan yang ditimbul dalam PRK kali ini bukanlah disebabkan oleh sistem e-voting, tetapi disebabkan oleh cara perlaksanaan pemilihan MPMUM sesi kali ini secara keseluruhannya.

Antara masalah yang dikemukakan :

1. Tiada garis panduan yang lengkap tentang peraturan dan tatacara evoting semasa pilihanraya berlangsung. Masalah yang dimaksudkan bukanlah tentang garis panduan atas cara proses pengundian berlangsung.

Contoh : Tiada maklumat tentang hard disk yang akan dihantar ke DTC selepas proses pengundian tamat.

2. Kolej kediaman ketujuh, mahasiswa kurang upaya, dibantu oleh 2 orang pegawai HEP yang bertugas. Semasa pemantauan yang dilakukan oleh Ayuni, Bee san dan saya, tempat pengundian mahasiswa kurang upaya di jaga oleh seorang staff kolej dan seorang dari PTM yang memantau.

Keraguan dan sistem melanggar peraturan : Kerahsiaan pengundi tidak di jaga.

3. Operasi di Kolej Kediaman ke-12, oleh Tim, Kak Ayuni dan saya, kami berjaya mengumpul cai. 1 cai dari Pro Mahasiswa berwarna pink, dan cai penggerak mahasiswa disetiap meja komputer. Pihak yang menjaga tempat mengundi diminta untuk memeriksa kawasan tersebut secara konsisten

4. Fakulti ekonomi, laporan dari Syazwan. Mahasiswa dibenarkan membawa beg masuk ke dalam tempat mengundi. Seorang pelajar telah berjaya di tangkap dihadapan ketua tempat mengundi. (tak ingt kena tangkap sebab ape)

5. diragui kesahihan :D

6.Tarikh pilihanraya yang diadakan semasa pelajar tahun 1 medical faculty bercuti.

Keterangan dari HEP: Tarikh telah ditetapkan semasa perjumpaan Jawatan Kuasa Induk. Wakil Fakulti Perubatan tidak memaklumkan perkara ini kepada Jawatan kuasa induk. Susulan dari itu,Dekan Fakulti Perubatan telah berjumpa dengan pelajar tahun 1 untuk memaklumkan perkara ini. Mereka diberi dua pilihan :

1. Menukar tarikh cuti
2. Meneruskan cuti dan datang pada hari pengundian.

Pilihan mereka : 2

Persoalan yang timbul : Kenapa tarikh pilihan raya tidak ditukar, sedangkan notis belum dikeluarkan?

Jawapan HEP : Banyak perkara yang perlu diselesaikan, bukan sahaja melibatkan pertukaran tarikh.Understood. Bukan senang nak laksanakan satu pemilihan.

Maklumat terkini, tarikh pilihan raya ditetapkan semasa meeting di TNC-TNC KPT. Menurut akta atau peraturan, tarikh pilihanraya tak perlu sama antara semua Universiti. Jadi secara logiknya, tarikh ini sebenarnya boleh ditukar dan tidak perlu tarikh PRK yang sama dengan Universiti lain.

Keraguan : Siapa yang tetapkan tarikh sebenarnya.. Mengikut akta Jawatan Kuasa Induk Pemilihan. Kenapa perlu keselarasan antara TNC-TNC di seluruh Malaysia *ini tambahan dari saya sendiri, tak dimasukkan dalam meeting NC*

7. Pelajar di Klang mengundi di Kampus UTAMA

Pelajar yang turun mengundi : +/- 80
Keseluruhan pelajar : +- 200

Jawapan TNC : Sistem E-voting - intranet, dan kerisauan keselamatan hard disk yang dibawa dari Klang ke Kampus UTAMA. ok Logik.

9. Calon-calon, pencadang dan pengokong Penggerak Mahasiswa dikuarantin di Hotel Quality. Terdapat pegawai HEPA yang berada di situ. Melalui pemerhatian dari luar pintu masuk Hotel Quality, kebanyakkan yang terlibat adalah dari Kolej Kediaman ke-sebelas.hmm..

Maklumat terbaru : Prog tersebut tidak dapat di kaitkan dengan universiti malaya, bilik2 tersebut ditempah dibawah kerajaan Negeri Selangor

*konfius sekejap* I thot penggerak mahasiswa pro establishment..hm

Anda yang terlibat, bantu kami untuk pilihanraya kampus yang lebih adil dan telus! Anda mampu mengubah.

 
10. Penggunaan Van HEPA ke Muar, oleh calon-calon penggerak Mahasiswa berbangsa Cina.

Tiada maklumat lanjut, anda mampu mengubah situasi.

11. Calon-calon Pro Mahasiswa disekat untuk masuk berkempen (happen last year and this year)

This Year: Permohonan waktu yang sama, Pro M di katakan lambat, Penggerak Boleh berkempen

Kolej kediaman ke 4:
Pro M dan Penggerak Mahasiswa dijemput untuk berkempen
Pukul 9: Pro M hadir, Pengetua Kolej Turun, Pelajar Sedikit
Calon Pro Mahasiswa pulang, Penggerak Hadir, Pengumuman dibuat supaya pelajar turun.

" Jenayah terancang mampu untuk mengalahkan kebaikan yang tidak terancang"

Pandangan peribadi: Perlawanan antara mahasiswa, admin tak terlibat, so tak apa lah :D Menarik je PRK.hehe

12. Notis dikeluarkan dalam tempoh yang terlalu singkat: MPMUM kosong 08/09 tahu tentang tarikh pilihanraya seminggu lebih awal sebelum notis dikeluarkan. Kedua-dua pihak mendapat maklumat lebih awal dari pengetua masing-masing dan MPMUM.

Tapi persoalannya, notis yang dikeluarkan selepas tarikh pembubaran MPMUM 08/09, 21 Jan borang dijual, Hari Jumaat mahasiswa perlu mendapatkan tanda tangan Dekan-dekan Fakulti, Isnin penamaan calon.

Kita jelas, meraka yang bertanding di bawah tiket Pro Mahasiswa dan Penggerak Mahasiswa mampu untuk mengetahui maklumat ini lebih awal, tapi bagaimana dengan mahasiwa yang mahu bertanding secara bebas, atau ingin bertanding, tetapi tidak mendapat maklumat. Sedangkan dalam AUKU dan Peraturan Universiti, mahasiswa tidak boleh bertanding secara berkumpulan..hmmm

13. Laporan berserta dengan gambar menunjukkkan ada pelajar dari kolej kediaman kedua belas menyalin num kad pengenalan dan matrik number pelajar yang belum turun mengundi 30 minit sebelum tamat waktu pengundian.

Premis Peribadi yang dikemukakan semasa mesyuarat TIDAK PASTI berlaku atau tidak

Assuming that, orang yang jaga tempat mengundi, berkomplot dengan pelajar yang menyalin nombor kad pengenalan dan matrik pelajar yang belum mengundi.

Pelajar yang sudah mengundi, boleh datang mengundi sekali lagi dengan menggunakan no kad pengenalan pelajar yang belum mengundi di sebabkan kad matrik tidak perlu di scan semasa penjanaan pin num. Di sini pengundi hantu hadir.

Sistem E-voting ini, baik. namun mungkin untuk kali pertama terdapat kekurangan dan boleh diperbaiki untuk masa akan datang antara cadangan :

 
1. Kertas tentang pengundian akan di print out setiapkan pengundian berlangsung. Kertas akan dimasukkan ke dalam peti seperti penggundian secara manual. Sekiranya terdapat bantahan, undi boleh dikira semula.

2. Kad matrik perlu di scan setiap kali sebelum pengundian berlangsung, untuk mengelakkan pengundi hantu

3. Tempat pengundian ditukar kepada FAKULTI.

INGAT, sistem ini perlu pembaikan, begitu juga dengan sistem manual. Andai orang yang melaksanakan sistem ini corrupt, maka tak kira sistem e-voting, atau manual yang anda pakai, ketidakadilan tetap akan berlaku.

14. BTN MPP seluruh Malaysia. Pro Mahasiswa di buruk-burukkan. Double standard!

 
15. MPMUM Pro-M mahasiswa di buang dari kolej kediaman
Penjelasan TNC HEPA : bukan dibuang tetapi tidak diterima untuk tinggal di kolej kediaman untuk sesi seterusnya.

Terima Kasih TNC HEP, usaha anda membantu untuk menempatkan kami di kolej-kolej lain amat dihargai.

Namun, kami menerima serat kedua oleh Ketua Pengetua Kolej kediaman, yang menyatakan dengan terpaksa memberi peluang kepada kami untuk tinggal di kolej-kolej lain, kami telah merampas tempat pelajar lain. Saya tidak pasti Ketua Pengetua tersebut menaip surat tersebut sendiri atas hanya menandatangan. Saya hormat beliau. saya harap ayat tidak profesional itu bukan dari beliau
Atas faktor ini dan beberapa faktor lain, kami ( bukan semua) bersetuju untuk menolak tawaran tinggal di kolej.

Terima kasih atas mereka yang terlibat melakukan kejahatan terancang ini, anda telah berjaya membantu melambatkan kerja-kerja kami untuk membantu mahasiswa kerana sibuk menyelesaikan masalah peribadi.

16. Layanan terhadap MPMUM 08/09. Tak perlu nak diceritakkan pada semua. terlalu panjang.

Banyak lagi perkara yang dibincangkan, terlalu panjang untuk dimuatkan

***

Ada juga pengetua yang melaung-laung *we win, we win*..hmm double standard~maklumat dari admin, tidak dimaklumkan semasa perjumpaan dengan NC

Tetapi, anda perlu hadam, tak semua HEPA itu kejam dan jahat, hanya individu tertentu yang perlu dinyahkan untuk membaiki sistem ini. Kadang-kadang individu tersebut, bukan orang yang berjawatan besar.

TNC HEPA play safe dalam situasi tertentu. Saya tak pasti tentang kata-kata yang dilemparkan terhadap beliau. Saya kenal beliau sebagai orang yang baik, berhemah, tetapi PLAY SAFE..

Kita sama-sama bersetuju, perbezaan ideologi tidak mengapa, cuba untuk celebrate the differences between each other..hmm..tapi percampuran pihak tertentu dalam politik mahasiswa adalah dilarang sama sekali.

Bagi yang menang, jalankan tanggungjawab anda sebaik mungkin. Komitmen anda akan membantu meringankan bebanan yang lain DAN pertembungan politik semasa pilihanraya, tolak ketepi, anda punya misi dan visi yang lebih penting untuk di capai, dalam masa setahun. Bekerja dengan orang yang berlainan ideologi, dari situ anda dapat menilai yang mana kaca, yang mana permata.

Disebabkan terlalu byk pnyelewengn yg brlaku mlibatkn TNC HEPA,Prof. Madya Dato' Dr.Azarae Idris smada sebelum,semasa&selepas PRK berlangsung,Dato' NC,Prof.Dato'Dr.Ghauth Jasmon&pimpinan mahasiswa tlh brsetuju atas 2 perkara: 1) Menyiasat TNC HEPA & kakitanganny yg trlibat dlm penyelewengn trsebut 2) Mnangguhkan... segala keputusan berkaitan PRK sehingga diadakan pemilihan semula secara adil, telus & bebas.Sekian [ ayat ini exaggerate :P, PRK hanya akan diadakan semula ANDAI bukti dapat dikemukankan]

Undi semula? selepas apa yang dibentangkan, di atas, anda tentukan releven atau tidak.

Kita seharusnya membantah cara perlaksanaan sistem, bukan sistem E-voting itu.

***

To my Pro-M

Anda emotional. Ingat Politik kita buat politik emosi. Politik kita politik rasional. Berdiri atas paksi yang benar, penuh dengan hujah-hujah yang jelas dan matang, bukan dengan cara merosakkan komputer..Sila gunakan terma yang betul semasa mengeluarkan kenyataan, terma dan maklumat yang tidak tepat telah mengguris hati ramai pihak :P

To Penggerak Mahasiswa.

Anda tau korupsi berlaku di dalam sistem anda, BETULKAN!

ps: saya mohon maaf atas kekasaran bahasa. Maklumat yang salah. Sila betulkan.
pps: please share this link. thanks
ppps: tak baca semula, sorry ayat macam kartun

Riddles :)

“I tell many lies but am always believed

If the worst happen, I’ll be greatly relieved

On the day you were born I poisoned your heart

I’ll still be there on the day you depart”—1st phrase

“I’m keeping your secret, you’re paying my price

You know if you don’t, I’ll stop being nice

Protection is worth it, would not you say?

Life is so empty when you don’t get your way”---2nd phrase

“One day u love me, the next day you hate

But you never resist the hook and the bait

You cry for escape, but what do I care?

The net that I cast is a permanent snare”----3rd phrase

PS: try to guess what are the first, second n third phase all about :)

PPS : first post for 2010!