Robin is just a regular guy trying to do a job he has no idea how to perform and then he gets friggin’ magic-napped and forearm-cursed. This is made wRobin is just a regular guy trying to do a job he has no idea how to perform and then he gets friggin’ magic-napped and forearm-cursed. This is made worse by the appearance of a super grouchy man with magical powers who crankily tries to help break the curse while also figuring out what happened to Reggie (goddammit, Reggie). This blossoms into a mystery-treasure hunt-love-story situation with a homicidal hedge and a very loyal house. Edwin’s family is among the worst to ever appear in fictional England, and we hope they have pebbles in their shoes at all times or experience back pain that makes sleep difficult. Robin’s sister, however? I think she’s going places....more
Emilia is just trying to live her best Jane Eyre life but the guy she wants to buy a savory pie from thought she was a sex worker (he isn’t judging, tEmilia is just trying to live her best Jane Eyre life but the guy she wants to buy a savory pie from thought she was a sex worker (he isn’t judging, they make good money) and she overreacts via beer dump (honestly? Fair). Gavin’s hair won’t stop curling and his sister is gross with her husband but his niblings are delectable so it’s fine. An inn? A storm! A GOVERNESS, which is this reviewer’s very favorite historical romance occupation. I highly recommend reading Forever Your Rogue before this to fully appreciate Cora’s fluttering anxiety, Nate’s impish advice, and all the “Mrs. Travers” mentions. BONUSES: a serious lawyer with rumpled linen; a justice-driven little girl; Nate just Nate always Nate crl + alt + v him we need several of him. Is there a dog? There is a dog....more
Yes, it’s a sentient door. It’s sentient because it would be weird if it was just a normal door. Yes, she fucks the door. The door is almost murdered Yes, it’s a sentient door. It’s sentient because it would be weird if it was just a normal door. Yes, she fucks the door. The door is almost murdered so she uses wood putty on its bullet wound. The door has a praise kink. There is a murderer roaming around and the door is unhappy about it.
George has been in love with Phoebe since she was a baby, which admittedly sounds pretty out there even for a historical, but he didn’t know it so I gGeorge has been in love with Phoebe since she was a baby, which admittedly sounds pretty out there even for a historical, but he didn’t know it so I guess it’s fine. When she gets engaged to a Duke with a small pecker, George reluctantly agrees to teach her how to boink which turns out to be a bad idea, feelings-wise. At one point, Phoebe’s brother laments that he can’t marry her, challenging the whole baby thing for Bonkers Supremacy. This book starts off a slightly angsty sex-lesson tale and around the 55% mark takes a HARD left into “what the hell is going on”. George says mean stuff; Phoebe is betrayed; Alice sucks; there’s a wild pig chase (?). Phoebe responds to George’s unintended cruelty exactly how I would, which is by reminding him of it every second of the day for the rest of my life. She gets over it when George almost dies in a closet but whatever. ...more
Three babies are born at the exact same time to the exact same father. This is a romance novel so sure, why not. They’re all abused and neglected and Three babies are born at the exact same time to the exact same father. This is a romance novel so sure, why not. They’re all abused and neglected and one of them is in love with his sister. Devil, whose name is indicative of his overall Drama Queen proclivities, hates his brother Ewan and hatches a plan to bang every woman alive so Ewan can’t marry anyone. This backfires when his very first project turns out to be super good at picking locks and figuring out that Devil and his brother Beast are smuggling savants and not humble ice importers. The following happens: daytime garden sex; he breaks down a door; her family sucks; rooftop sex (they like the great outdoors); Devil lies compulsively and then feels guilty about it. There’s a hot Norwegian woman. There is a cold-man grovel. What happens next? I’m literally about to find out because I just started to read the second book. ...more
A young woman whose family is too stupid to realize she’s deaf as opposed to intellectually disabled is assaulted by a drunken lout who gets her pregnA young woman whose family is too stupid to realize she’s deaf as opposed to intellectually disabled is assaulted by a drunken lout who gets her pregnant. The lout’s brother marries her in a display of white knightness that backfires when he decides that he’s attracted to her despite her maturity capping out at second grade. Annie was assumed to be incompetent early on in life so the idea of teaching her literally anything was dismissed, resulting in a Nell/Spring Awakening combination that is as fun as it sounds. Alex does love Annie, but also has sex with her when she has no idea what it means, creating a Very Ish scenario. Am I taking this too seriously? Probably. Is Annie described as “child-like” in some form several dozen times, making sex with her weird? Yeah. Could I get behind this romance? Eh....more