Shelf Blame's Reviews > Beholder

The really lovely thing about Ryan La Sala is that each of his books is better than the last. Don't get me wrong - I've loved them all. But truly you can see how their writing has expanded and where they've put themselves into the dark corners of the stories. The Honeys was fantastic for its brightness that covered up something dark and horrible, and Beholder is fantastic for the darkness that threatens to smother any light at all.

I'm loathe to give too much away here - I went in knowing nothing about this book other than the cover looks deliciously creepy and it was a horror. I think that worked in my favor.

Athen avoids looking at himself too closely in any mirrors, and while that's due to many horror-filled reasons, it also speaks so closely to what a lot of people really fear. Who are we anyway? We see ourselves backward in a mirror, so our mirror selves see us as we are. They look back at us. But what about what reflects on other people? Sometimes we cover ourselves in a shroud of personality that we don't even like. Sometimes (especially if we're queer) we're sunny and happy and fun because we want people to think 'Safe'! 'Normal'! 'One of the good ones!' Sometimes we cover ourselves in armor as a way to keep people at bay. But it's for the same reason - so they don't really see what the mirror sees. In Athen's head we're on a journey of grief and guilt and listlessness, and it's only in the eyes of Dom that he's able to actually stop and let someone see what the mirror sees too. And it's the same with Dom. I read both boys as ND and felt Dom's frustration with conversation and working on solutions in an almost manic way, and I felt the way Athen saw this and through it, saw Dom, too.

The imagery here is psychological horror gold. There's some brutality and death and blood, but honestly, those aren't even the most horrible scenes. Again I really don't want to give anything away. But eyes and dripping gloves and spiders...someone make this a movie I can watch for the imagery alone, honestly.

Add this to your October TBR pls and thank you.