Anne's Reviews > The Fireman

The Fireman by Joe Hill
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it was ok
bookshelves: kindle-app, horror, read-in-2016, thriller-suspense

2.5 stars

Ehhhhhhh.
Boy, that ending petered out like a squeaky fart, didn't it?

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I mean, the beginning was good. I got sucked in by the whole Dragonscale/apocalypse thing. The middle was goodish, but it meandered around too much. Then the last part leading up to the ending had a bit of the nail biter going for it, but the actual ending?
WTF, dude? Where's my payoff for reading this enormous fucker?!

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In the interest of transparency, I should mention that I'm the kind of reader that gets butthurt by endings I don't understand, like, or agree with.
So. There's that.

Ok, for everyone who loved this book, I hope you don't think I'm belittling Hill, or your taste. I really loved Locke & Key, but this is the only other thing I've read of his, and (while I think he's probably a good writer) I'm not really sure what the hell just happened here. For such a promising start, I really felt like he shit the bed by the last page.
Ok. Maybe that's not a fair assessment of this book, but I did feel disappointed when it was over.
So. Yeah. I didn't get the hype. At. All.

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Also, fuck all the Mary Poppins references. It's not that awesome of a movie, and I have very little respect for a grown woman who imagines herself to be a budding Ms. Poppins.

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In the end, I'd say it's just not my type of book. It's not horrible, but I can't see myself recommending it, either.

Psst...if you're hoping for this kind of Fireman, you're going to be sorely disappointed.
Not that I thought this was about a sexy fireman. Nope.
*cough*
But, seriously. I wouldn't have complained.


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Reading Progress

August 30, 2016 – Started Reading
August 30, 2016 – Shelved
September 9, 2016 – Finished Reading

Comments Showing 1-50 of 85 (85 new)


Justine Nice pic, Anne:)


Anne I aim to please, Justine... ;)


Gunjan (NerdyBirdie) I agree with the problems that you had. And yay! Someone else who doesn’t get all the Mary Poppins references. Let’s not forget Julie Andrews!


Jennifer "WTF, dude? Where's my payoff for reading this enormous fucker?!" Exactly Anne! Exactly!!!


message 5: by Trish (new)

Trish Bwahahaha. That nice last gif ALMOST made up for your bashing of Mary Poppins! *puts hands on hips*
Will you tell me (view spoiler) how it ends so I can understand WHY you were so disappointed? I'm not gonna read this book anyway.


Anne NerdyBirdie wrote: "I agree with the problems that you had. And yay! Someone else who doesn’t get all the Mary Poppins references. Let’s not forget Julie Andrews!"

Julie is a fine actress, you know? But I can't imagine getting all into MP that much,. Blech. Spoonful of sugar, my ass...


Anne Jennifer wrote: ""WTF, dude? Where's my payoff for reading this enormous fucker?!" Exactly Anne! Exactly!!!"

*high five*


Anne Trish wrote: "Bwahahaha. That nice last gif ALMOST made up for your bashing of Mary Poppins! *puts hands on hips*
Will you tell me [spoilers removed] how it ends so I can understand WHY you were so disappointed?..."


(view spoiler)


message 9: by Trish (new)

Trish *snorts*
OK that sounds HORRIBLE!
(view spoiler)


Jennifer Anne wrote: "Trish wrote: "Bwahahaha. That nice last gif ALMOST made up for your bashing of Mary Poppins! *puts hands on hips*
Will you tell me [spoilers removed] how it ends so I can understand WHY you were so..."


Trish, Anne isn't exaggerating. It was SUCH a letdown...


message 11: by Trish (new)

Trish Really too bad. After all the raving from other friends here I had expectations (although I neverplanned on reading it myself).


message 12: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne It was weird, wasn't it, Jennifer?! All that buildup, then NOTHING.


message 13: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Trish, I think you made the right call by avoiding this one.


message 14: by Mir (new)

Mir I would never think of Mary Poppins as a go-to-text for surviving an apocalypse.


Jennifer Anne wrote: "It was weird, wasn't it, Jennifer?! All that buildup, then NOTHING."

It really was. I was kinda mad for a minute lol


message 16: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Miriam wrote: "I would never think of Mary Poppins as a go-to-text for surviving an apocalypse."

Yaaaas. Quite random, imho.


message 17: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Jennifer wrote: "Anne wrote: "It was weird, wasn't it, Jennifer?! All that buildup, then NOTHING."

It really was. I was kinda mad for a minute lol"


I was too! Like I mentioned, I get butthurt and have to vent sometimes. Heh.


message 18: by Trish (last edited Sep 10, 2016 08:29PM) (new)

Trish Miriam wrote: "I would never think of Mary Poppins as a go-to-text for surviving an apocalypse."

I would!

But then again, I'm weird. ;)


message 19: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Of course you would...


message 20: by Trish (last edited Sep 10, 2016 08:36PM) (new)

Trish Anne wrote: "Of course you would..."

You know me so well. ;P
The thing is, I'm not even ashamed of it. Just picture it:

You, Miriam and me during the apocalypse or shortly after, all around is chaos and no plumbing and you two wouldn't have any toilet paper ... I'd just open my big-ass magical bag and produce a roll for each. Ha! You would so not make jokes about me then!


message 21: by Asghar (new) - added it

Asghar Abbas It's good to see you reviewing books again, I missed your reviews and it is refreshing that someone didn't love this book lol from what you are saying , this sounds like a below average Stephen King novel. I've been on the fence about this one, should I not get it ? Was it better than the Cell? Because I didn't like that one .


message 22: by Licha (new) - added it

Licha Anne, I missed your reviews. This was pure Anne. Loved it, especially all your firemen gifs. (That's not what this is about?! *letdown*)

You're the second reviewer who basically pointed out these bad things about this book. Maybe Joe should stick with the graphic books.

Oh, and Julie looks so pretty. But I do hear there is way too many MP references. Like way too many.


message 23: by Mir (new)

Mir Oh, well, yes, if you actually *were* Mary Poppins that would obviously be an advantage. The one in the book was pretty tough, too.


message 24: by Trish (new)

Trish Miriam wrote: "Oh, well, yes, if you actually *were* Mary Poppins that would obviously be an advantage. The one in the book was pretty tough, too."

See? Not so bad/boring after all! ;)


message 25: by Mir (new)

Mir Indeed. I will cherish the phrase "post-apocalyptic Mary Poppins" in my heart, in hopes that I someday have a book for which it could be a suitable tag line.


message 26: by Trish (new)

Trish Miriam wrote: "Indeed. I will cherish the phrase "post-apocalyptic Mary Poppins" in my heart, in hopes that I someday have a book for which it could be a suitable tag line."

BWAHAHAHAHA!


message 27: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Asghar wrote: "It's good to see you reviewing books again, I missed your reviews and it is refreshing that someone didn't love this book lol from what you are saying , this sounds like a below average Stephen Kin..."

Thank you! I've missed Goodreads!


message 28: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Licha wrote: "Anne, I missed your reviews. This was pure Anne. Loved it, especially all your firemen gifs. (That's not what this is about?! *letdown*)

You're the second reviewer who basically pointed out these..."


Dawww! Come here and give me a hug, Licha!


message 29: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Miriam & Trish, I'd ride out the apocalypse with either of you. I have a feeling it would be safer that way.


message 30: by Trish (new)

Trish Anne wrote: "Miriam & Trish, I'd ride out the apocalypse with either of you. I have a feeling it would be safer that way."

*wiggles eyebrows*


message 31: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne You have a flamethrower, don't you?


message 32: by Trish (new)

Trish


message 33: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne I knew it!


message 34: by Trish (new)

Trish I live to please my diabolical side.


message 35: by Mir (last edited Sep 12, 2016 06:53PM) (new)

Mir I have, um, a power washer hose? Not really the same :(


message 36: by Trish (new)

Trish Miriam wrote: "I have, um, a power washer hose? Not really the same :("

What ARE you talking about?! We will need it as a makeshift shower! Or do you want to survive the apocalypse only to die from the smell?!


message 37: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne You've got a shrink ray, though.


message 38: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Or is it an enlargement ray? Tsk. Don't advertise it, if you do. The guys on here will never leave you alone.


message 39: by Mir (new)

Mir Bwahaha!


message 40: by Licha (new) - added it

Licha *Hugs* So good to see you back.


message 41: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Licha wrote: "*Hugs* So good to see you back."

Nice to have a day off!


message 42: by Trish (new)

Trish Pfff, day off. I told you what you need to do next time your kids don't have school. *evil grin*


message 43: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Ha! Ugh. Almost time to get them...
I mean, GOSH, I sure have missed them today!


message 44: by Trish (new)

Trish Bwahahahaha!


message 45: by Linda (new)

Linda Anne, not sure which I enjoy more, your reviews of the comments after! Thanks all for the smiles!!


message 46: by Liis (new)

Liis :D I added this book to ym TBR pile when the hype started... after seeing some not-so-great reviews and now yours, I need to go and clean up my TBR list... I ain't gonna put myself through this! Thanks for the entertaining review!


message 47: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Linda wrote: "Anne, not sure which I enjoy more, your reviews of the comments after! Thanks all for the smiles!!"

Glad you got a smile out of it, Linda!


message 48: by Anne (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne Liz wrote: ":D I added this book to ym TBR pile when the hype started... after seeing some not-so-great reviews and now yours, I need to go and clean up my TBR list... I ain't gonna put myself through this! Th..."

If you do decide to read it, let me know what you think, Liz. Maybe without all the hype, it won't be bad?


message 49: by Jen (new) - rated it 1 star

Jen Great review Anne! I tend to find the Stephen King can't nail an ending to save his life. Maybe his son is following in his footsteps?


message 50: by Anne (last edited Dec 22, 2016 03:30AM) (new) - rated it 2 stars

Anne I don't know, Jen. Maybe? I loved his Locke and Key graphic series, so I have hope for Young King. I think this one may have been overhyped, and that led to its downfall (for me). Have you read Heart Shaped Box? Everyone says it's the shit!


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