Sofia's Reviews > Red Queen

To whoever thought writing formulaic YA dystopian novels was a good idea....

I hate you.


YA dystopia is basically a game of Mad Libs. Shall we play?

__Insert name__ lives in a corrupt society where people are divided by __insert something along the lines of factions/districts/blood color__. She is a __insert oppressed race__, which means she slaves away for the "good" of __insert corrupt government__. But __insert name__ is not like other girls. She can __insert special ability__, which makes her a target. She longs for home and the boy she left behind, __insert boy she left behind__, who is probably in love with her, even though she is blissfully oblivious. But there is another boy within the corrupt government who is not like other boys...

Et cetera, et cetera. Fill in the blanks.

Mare Barrow lives in a corrupt society where people are divided by the color of their blood. She is a Red, which means she slaves away for the "good" of the Silvers. But Mare is not like other girls. She can control electricity, which makes her a target. She longs for home and the boy she left behind, Kilorn, who is probably in love with her, even though she is blissfully oblivious. But there is another boy within the corrupt government who is not like other boys....

Katniss Everdeen lives in a corrupt society where people are divided by districts. She is a citizen of District 12, which means she slaves away for the "good" of the Capitol. But Katniss is not like other girls. She can use a bow, which makes her a target. She longs for home and the boy she left behind, Gale, who is probably in love with her, even though she is blissfully oblivious. But there is another boy within the corrupt government who is not like other boys....


Do you see? *awkward silence* *someone in the audience coughs* WE HAVE BEEN BRAINWASHED.



The rest of this review is riddled with spoilers, so stop here if you haven't read the book or if you just don't care.


This book makes no sense at all. Mare is sent off to become Silver royalty because she's special, but she doesn't have Silver blood. Which means a simple paper cut could expose her. First of all, Evangeline clearly wants to kill her, but prevents herself from cutting Mare multiple times because ~drama~ and ~suspense.~ But why do Elara and Tiberius want to keep her alive, anyway? Killing her would solve all their problems. It's not that hard to cover up her electric abilities afterwards. And then they betroth her to Maven, but why would they want a Red in a position of power? Of course, it's all a set-up at the end, but really? Mare fell for this? It's so blatantly obvious that Maven was lying. What would he have to gain, anyway? There are so many holes in this plot, and Mare either ignores them because of ✨love✨ or is too empty-headed to see them. This so-called Scarlet Guard trusts him blindly, giving him all their precious little secrets. It's so dumb. And then Elara is apparently a whisper, so she can look through people's thoughts. They somehow thought they would never be found (they being Mare Barrow). Don't be an idiot. Oops, it's too late.


I haven't seen any characters this bland since Kai, either. Cal and Maven are the same person, except one is less powerful and moody. Why is this a hard choice for Mare? Just kill them both, escape, pull a Kaz Brekker or whatever. Forget the stupid angsty princes and their stupid angsty declarations of fake love. Life's too short to waste it with men.


My favorite character was Evangeline. Yes, the shallow mean girl who was only there to antagonize Mare. Because girl-on-girl hate is just SO COOL. I hope you detect my sarcasm. At least she knew what she was doing, unlike Bone Marrow (courtesy to whoever told me that joke, it was A+).


And Horse Wheelbarrow must feel personally responsible for EVERY LITTLE THING, even if she didn't even cause it.

I feel like a traitor. What are my parents eating for dinner tonight?

Eat the stupid food. That's what it's there for.

If it all goes to plan, he'll never hug his sister again. Evangeline will have lost a brother.

Oh, be quiet. People have siblings, okay? They don't matter.

He's a father. He's a father and we're going to kill him.

Just kill him already. I thought you hated these Silvers.

"Children." The words rip out of me. "He's a father.

Yeah, well, they're all fathers. They're all daughters/sons. They're all sisters/brothers. ??? What are you trying to say here? Everyone has family. Everyone is related to someone. just kill the guy already

Maybe he knew the colonel; maybe he was her brother, her cousin.

Again with the personal responsibility! Obviously they're related to someone.


And then there is Mare Barrow the Hypocrite, who hates all Silvers for being violent, heartless monsters and yet somehow expects them to treat Reds like more than glorified slaves. It works both ways, you know. Or, at least, it should.

Cal's blood might be silver, but his heart is as black as burned skin.

"I can fault him for whatever I want," I snort, remembering the war books and death guides all over his room. "He's just like all the others."

As if this weren't enough, Mare's not-like-other-girls-ness is so overpoweringly annoying that it seeps into all the prose.

"You don't seem like the girl to weep at the drop of a hat."

My stomach churns, but not with the excitement or nerves or any of the things silly girls talk about.

Excuse me? Can I not be excited or nervous without being branded as a "silly girl?"

Finally (I'm almost done), can we stop with this purple-prose-that's-just-weird trend that's going on in YA?

The only things that serve to distinguish us, outwardly at least, is that Silvers stand tall. Our backs are bent by work and unanswered hope and the inevitable disappointment with our lot in life.

Congratulations. You are officially On-Brand YA.

My heart plummets in my chest until it bounces around my toes.

What is this? Shatter Me?

There's only one thing I did like--Queen Elara. She was a very compelling villain with layers, which surprised me in a book that was purely black-and-white. I sympathized with her (sometimes, at least more than I did with Horse).


But, for the most part, this was the same old thing that's been churning out of the YA Machines since the year 2000.

1.5 stars

Buddy read with my bestest buddy. We both hated it.