Lacey's Reviews > After

I’m just going to start off this review by saying that this is the worst book I’ve ever read.

My shelf (which were all made because of this book, by the way) names should speak for themselves:

1-star, abusive-love-interest, books-i-wont-admit-i-read, disgusting, do-not-read, end-me-now, lost-faith-in-humanity, my-brain-cells-are-suffering, never-again, no-just-no, problematic, recommend-to-my-worst-enemy, toxic-relationship, what-the, why-was-this-written

I don’t want anyone else to go through the torture I and my friends went through from reading this. I’ve seen some people say that this book is like a drug, and I actually agree with them. You know why? BECAUSE IT’S BAD. Didn’t we all learn this in elementary school? Don’t do drugs, kids. I mean that literally and figuratively. If someone ever compares a book to drugs, run far, far away. This isn’t addictive or even a “guilty pleasure”. Hardin is also compared to a drug in this book if that tells you anything. No. Just no. I have lost all hope for humanity if this is what we’ve come to.

I rarely hate books, and when I do, there’s usually at least one thing I like about it. Not with this book. I actually hate everything about it. Of course, opinions on books are subjective, but I can not think of one reason someone would like that book. Just thinking about it makes me rage. I want to kill someone. Preferably T*ssa or H*rdin.



**this review will have spoilers, although I hope you don’t care because you shouldn’t want to read this**

TW/CW: [rape, slut-shaming, emotional/domestic abuse, descriptive sex, drinking, alcoholism, past trauma, peer-pressure, general nastiness.]

Here are only a few of the many problematic things in this book:

- Hardin being abusive towards Tessa
- Hardin being extremely controlling
- Hardin kissing Tessa to shut her up
- Tessa saying something that implies that people with OCD are crazy
- Tessa slut-shaming a lot
- Tessa cheating on Noah even though she knows it's bad
- Tessa lying to Noah constantly
- Hardin threatening to watch Tessa get changed if she doesn't hurry up
- The theme of the book being that all it takes for a bad boy to become "better" is a good girl (girls are not your medication my guy)
- That weird line about Hardin not being straight in the beginning
- The "two genders" line
- The implication that it's ok for Hardin to be an asshole because his dad was always drunk and left him when he was ten

Think that’s almost everything?



First off I just want to say that abuse is not a joke. It shouldn’t be romanticized. If you are experiencing something similar to Tessa and Hardin’s relationship, please call the domestic violence hotline. Stay safe and please get help if needed.

This book follows Tessa as she goes into her first year of college. She’s not like other girls, she’s a good girl. All she does is study and she never has fun. So not other girl-like. She wants to be successful in life and she never gets in trouble, making her not like other girls. She’s a virgin, unlike those other girls, or as she would say “those other sluts”. And guess what? She reads! Classic literature! *gasp* Did I mention she’s not like other girls?

Then she meets Hardin. And surprise surprise, he’s a bAd BoY. What else did you expect? He has a lip ring, which we are reminded of constantly. Hardin is also not like other boys. He’s British. He has tousled hair. He has dark, but somehow soft eyes. And he’s very hot, which we are also constantly reminded of because apparently being “hot” makes up for the abuse and literal rape. He also reads classic literature, therefore very smart and a good person. Definitely.



After Tessa’s first interaction with him, she automatically decides that he is extremely rude. He is rude. But of course, Tessa is drawn to him. Even though she shouldn’t be. She has a boyfriend. A good, reliable, kind one. He’s actually one of the only decent characters in the book. So why would she want anything to do with him? We’re all asking the same question.

Surprise surprise, they end up getting together. While Tessa is still with Noah and Hardin is still messing around with literally every girl in the school. End me now.

Tessa and Hardin’s relationship is terrible, horrible, no good, very bad, I could go on. All they do is fight -> have sex -> say they love each other -> fight, and then the cycle repeats. FOR ALMOST 600 PAGES. It’s emotionally and physically abusive. Tessa herself realizes this. But does she still go back to him every time? Of course. She just can’t stop herself because when she looks into his eyes-- I’m going to stop. Hardin is so awful that whenever he’s nice to her (which is only after they do the deed, obviously) he is praised and Tessa says stuff about how she wishes he could always be nice. The thing that got me most is when he was nice Tessa knew he was just going to be mean soon enough. SHE LITERALLY SAID IT. So why doesn’t she cut all ties with him? SHE’S AN IDIOT IS THE ONLY ANSWER. I don’t even feel bad for her because she’s not even making an effort and she’s extremely hypocritical.

Sorry, I’m angry just thinking about it. Deep breaths.

Hardin is extremely overprotective of Tessa. And not in a good way. Apparently it’s okay for him to go with other girls every time Tessa doesn’t do exactly what he wants but if Tessa so much as waves to another guy all hell breaks loose. You don’t even care about her anyways, why does it matter so much to you?

Who thought this was a good idea? This is Wattpad fanfiction. Not even good Wattpad fanfiction. And you can tell. You write every single stereotype and overused trope but make them 10000x worse, add lots of problematic things, and you have After. I would sincerely apologize to Harry Styles (who this is a fanfic of), but he already has the author blocked on Twitter. Rightfully so. I’m sure the actual Harry is a kind person, but I will never view him the same. This is creepy fan behavior.

The writing is truly the quality of a Wattpad fanfic, as expected. It just deteriorates throughout the book and slowly descends into negative levels of quality. All of it is more funny when you imagine Hardin’s “mad” lines in a British accent. I was wheezing, and to be honest, that was the only thing getting me through this book. I don’t think this was edited before it was published. Or even read over, because this is so problematic I don’t know how any publisher could publish this. It gives me hope that maybe my book can actually get published.

The characters are all awful. I hate everyone. Except maybe Landon, Noah, and Steph. Those are also the only characters who have a bit of sense.



I feel bad for them because they have to deal with everyone’s idiocy.



The girl-on-girl hate and slut-shaming in here are off the charts. Tessa is extremely judgemental of Steph, her roommate, just because she has piercings, tattoos, and doesn’t dress modestly. Steph puts up with her through all of this and defends her even in spite of all of this. Molly, a side character who only exists to make Tessa jealous and Hardin to cheat on Tessa with, gets called a “skank” and “whore” by Tessa multiple times just because she has slept with Hardin before. Who’s going to tell Tessa she sleeps with him later

Anyways. Moving on.

One line of many that were extremely problematic:

I grab my books and lay them out neatly, in order of my class schedule, and stack the notes for each class on top of them.
“Are you OCD or something?”
“No, Hardin. Not everyone’s crazy because they just like things a certain way.”

As someone with diagnosed OCD, this is extremely offensive.

1. That’s not even what OCD is. OCD is not wanting everything to be perfect.
2. You aren’t OCD, you have OCD.
3. People with OCD are not crazy. You are if you think this is okay.

I could go more into this, but I’m mad enough already.

Another:

Everyone seems to be comfortable with half-naked bodies of both genders walking around; college life is strange so far, and it’s only the second day.

In case you didn’t know, there are more than two genders. Idiots. *rage* Wondering how Tessa got into college with an IQ in the negatives. (Which also happened to be the only school she applied to, further proving how dumb she is. Seriously. She didn’t even apply to one safety school.)

That brings us to.. the smut.


Real footage of my drowning myself in holy water after reading this.

Before reading this, I was reading reviews and I saw this one.

I thought it was joking.



THIS WAS AN ACTUAL SCENE IN THE BOOK. I AM NOT LYING. TRUST ME. I HAD TO GO THROUGH THIS PAIN. WHY. WHYYYYY

Some other questionable and concerning things happened, like Hardin fingering Tessa at a lake, them taking a shower together, doing it at Tessa’s job (how did this idiot even get the job), doing it A WEDDING, and more but that’s all I’m going to say.

Not to mention that many of these scenes can be classified as rape.

Tessa was cheating on Noah this whole time. But apparently it’s okay because she felt bad. She acknowledges that cheating is not okay, but continues to do it. It’s fine though!! She’s not like other girls so she can do that!!! She didn’t even break up with him but just had to be with Hardin because they were meant to be together apparently.

Ahahahahaha. No.



Noah finds out that Tessa is cheating on him in the most dramatic way ever, and this poor kid (bless his soul for tolerating Tessa) decides that they can still be together if Tessa never interacts with Hardin again.

Do you really think Tessa’s going to follow that?

Spoiler: She doesn’t.

Noah finds out yet again after Hardin and Tessa are caught by Hardin’s stepbrother (also one of the only decent characters) Landon. Then they finally break up.

While all this drama is happening, apparently Tessa is going to school and has a job?? But we see none of that?? Tessa and Hardin are too busy having sex and fighting?? I am done with this.

The reason Tessa and Hardin stay together is that he brings out the worst in her, but she brings out the best in him. Which is apparently a good reason for them to be together. Right. Because that’s totally not bad at all. Even though Hardin has been through terrible things, that doesn’t excuse any of his behavior. Being traumatized isn’t a free pass for you to go traumatize other people. The whole theme of this book that all Hardin needed to become a good person was a good girl is extremely problematic and wrong. It didn’t even work, because all they did was scream at each and have sex and guess what? Hardin’s still an asshole. He is a perfect example of why many women are scared of men.

The plot twist was just so shocking! Who would have known Hardin was just using Tessa to win a bet!! I can’t believe it.



It was revealed in the most dramatic way and of course Tessa is hEaRtBrOkEn. Hardin tries to apologize, but does he really think that’s going to work?



In conclusion, this is the worst and most problematic book I’ve ever read and my brain cells are suffering immensely. Please don’t read it. If this review convinces anyone not to read it, that will make up for the torture.

This review is dedicated to the Cursed Books Club. They have also lost many brain cells, but at least we did it together. I would have gone insane if it weren’t for you guys, and I can’t thank you enough. Show their reviews some love:
Andrea
Human
Ollie
And finally, Kade, Mel, Em, Cyrus, and Pluto, who are no longer with us.

Rest in pieces to our brain cells.


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Update: I’ve decided that since my brain cells are not yet fully functional to write a rant, I will be holding a funeral in honor of all the members of the cursed books club and the suffering we were put through at the hands of this book.

One like = one condolence and one cent to help fund therapy for us and Anna Todd.

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Um. I finished. I can now say that I have a least favorite book.

Rant to come, once my brain cells recover.

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I never thought I would read this book. But here we are.

This is the worst decision I’ve ever made.

At least I won’t suffer alone.

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buddy read with the cursed books club!