Conflict Resolution Demonstrate Your
Knowledge
Instructions
The following is taken from Case in Point on pages 293 of the Understanding interpersonal
communication: Making choices in changing times textbook.
"Tamara Wiley glanced in the mirror before leaving her apartment and heading to her 8 a.m.
class. She was having a bad hair day, so she had thrown on a scarf. Her quick check in the
mirror told her the scarf covered most of the problem. After class she was supposed to meet
her best friend, Jeff Harris, for coffee, but she was hoping he’d understand if she canceled
because she was way behind on her physics assignment. On her way to class, she called and
left Jeff a voice mail. Meanwhile, Jeff was having a bad morning. He’d been late with a
project at his part time job and his boss was not pleased. Jeff was really looking forward to
seeing Tamara for coffee because she understood him and could cheer him out of his
depression. When Jeff got to the coffee shop, he scanned the room for Tamara but didn’t see
her. He bought a latte for each of them and settled into an overstuffed chair to wait for her.
When Tamara’s latte got cold, Jeff started to get anxious. He called her apartment but there
was no answer. Jeff waited for another hour and finally left in disgust. Not only had he
wasted a lot of time waiting, he missed talking to Tamara, so now he was feeling even worse
than he had earlier. Later that evening when he finally reached her on the phone, he spoke
rather harshly, asking her where the hell she’d been when she was supposed to meet him.
Tamara was startled by his tone and replied rather coolly, “I left you a message that I had to
do an assignment and couldn’t make it to the coffee shop.” Jeff became angrier, say- ing, “I
didn’t pick up my messages and you know I hate voice mail, Tamara. If you’d really wanted
to let me know, you should have stopped by and just told me. I guess our relationship means
more to me than it does to you!” Tamara raised her voice, too. “Hold on, Jeffrey,” she said.
“You are making a huge deal out of nothing. I just couldn’t make it for coffee. Get over it and
don’t make something out of nothing.” Jeff’s voice grew cold: “Call me when you want to
get together sometime—at your convenience, of course.” Jeff slammed down the phone.
Tamara was left holding the receiver, listening to the dial tone, and wondering what had just
happened."
1. Is gender an issue in the case of Tamara and Jeff? If yes, explain how. If not, what
other factors might be influencing their conflict?
2. What skills might be useful in managing their conflict more productively?
3. What is a more appropriate solution to the scenario so that both Jeff and Tamara
can be more satisfied with their interaction?
