Whitney Atkinson's Reviews > At First Spite

this book was NOT good and i think at this point i need to stop pretending that olivia dade is for me

as much as i like reading books with representation of fat girls, this one came at the MAJOR expense of being unbearably unreadable. i hate to roast the main character because we did have a lot in common with our insecurities and depressive tendencies, but i really could not take her seriously because her dialogue was absolutely miserable. so overwritten, weighed down by memes and references that were sometimes decades old, and generally so unbelievable as a main character to the point where i was shocked that the main male lead didn't find her horrendous instead of attractive.

immediately when i read the one (and only...... and on page 300....) sex scene, all i could think about was how i was going to quote it WORD FOR WORD in this review because the main character's dialogue was absolutely diabolical. if i had to suffer, then so do you:

"You are the undisputed Champion of Head, long may he reign, and long may he lick. You can grab a condom and get inside the pussy you now own. Congratulations, by the way. The owner's manual will arrive in your inbox shortly."

HUUUUUHHHH??? who talks like that 😭😭😭

but wait, there's more.

"Don't you dare ask if that was good for me. Choirs are singing in the depths of my vagina. My clit already went online to nominate you for the Nobel Prize in Sexing, and my vulva have started a grassroots fundraising campaign to bronze your dick for posterity. You know the patron saint of really incredible head? Well, I saw his heavenly face tonight. He goes by the name Matthew, and eats pussy like it's his damn job."

literally begging to be taken out back like ol yeller and be shot. but i'll leave it at that.

the main male lead was also so terrible. he became a pediatrician after witnessing the death of his brother as a child, so he was so concerned about her health to the point where if she even got a papercut he would stop the world just to put a bandaid on her. it got to the point where it felt insulting and infantilizing, and he became controlling about what she should or shouldn't do. and the biggest plot hole for me was he never mentioned her weight as something that could be detrimental to her health?! it was a weird angle for this dude to have and constantly intrude on her life with.

their relationship was.... fine. i didn't particularly care that it was a "my ex's brother" trope, but i did think that the pieces of it fell too seamlessly into place and all the hard feelings that resulted from it were just smoothed out overnight. there's really no plot to be had here other than relationship drama, which i appreciate in romance books. but it still felt like this dragged on for 50 pages too long and the third act breakup was SO unnecessary.

long story short i survived BUT AT WHAT COST??? this literally took me 2 weeks to read because i hated it