Vicky & Tennisanyone

I've taken the liberty of posting a handful of photographs that I nicked from my great-grandfather's collection of memorabilia. 

After my great-grandmama passed, Lord Tennisanyone enjoyed a long, a very l o n g, and happy Second Act with his very "special friend" Vicky.

We didn't know much aboot her except that she was a well-to-do Widow from jolly old England.They hit it off like a house on fire and became inseperable...and except for the World Wars, a handful of exploration escapades and the early years of the Space Program, the two of them rarely missed an opportunity to be together. 

As you can see they shared a rich adventurous life for several decades longer than one would expect. We should all be so lucky eh?

IT's A MAN's WORLD AFTERALL

COME ON ALL OF YOU 52%ers!

No, really!? Q: If vertebrates are naturally formed as default females, then why-on-Earth do most people think that that a/the "Creator" would A: be a male and B: make this a "Man's World" ?

Obviously our human world is totally out of whack, so does it not stand to reason that this cruel mess is NOT the way it should, would or could be?



Since forever, males have over-stepped the natural order of things through sheer physical force and more recently, by perpetuating a various supernatural decrees which imply that having a wenis entitles them to run the show and make up all of the rules for females?

This observation presents several painfully obvious conclusions, the most egregious of which are, well,  painfully obvious.

REGAL DNA BEYOND REPAIR

DATELINE LONDON:

Following the recent trothing of Prince Willy Wales and Katty Kay, genetic scientists immediately sprang into action.

Newfound evidence of a once secret program which carefully monitors the breeding of aristocratic European families recently came to light.

Yesterday, around noon, several files were discovered by scavenging Government workers searching for food in the garbage bins behind the Freedom Of Information Bunker.

Members of Royalty are not bred for a specific skill or purpose other than to be entered into an ancient 'show' between Nations. Awards are generally based on conspicuous displays of wealth, but sometimes given to outgoing characters who have displayed outstanding, energetic acts of immorality.


From the files we learn that during the Middle Ages it became apparent that without fail, royal families produced offspring burdened with many undesirable attributes.

These traits ranged from simple undesirable character irregularities such as uncontrollable giggling, to despotic paranoia and delusions of grandeur.

One doctor, Lord Sinjin Tennisanyone, correctly deduced that this appalling condition was the direct result of over 800 years of unbridled inbreeding amongst the European Aristocracy.

In order to combat these terrible afflictions and maintain political stability, substitute eggmaidens were selected from asylums.

This selective breeding program was astonishingly successful and lasted well into the 20th Century.

However, once the Human Genome had been mapped, the Tennisanyone family, gatekeepers of the Royal basting and neutering program, introduced modern scientificky procedures in order to streamline the process and free-up their weekends.

These days all that is required to successfully create an aristocrat is a wee DNA sample from suitable donors most of which are still conveniently warehoused in asylums. 

A procedure that once required numerous bottles of Gin, scented candles, yards of velvet rope, and a tub of lard, can now be done in a matter of minutes.

The only constant still required is that the Princess or Queen must be either rendered unconscious or distracted with jewelry or shoes.

Here for the first time we can view the shocking photographic evidence of what could happen if scientists refused to intervene.

Exhibit A is unquestionably shocking. This is a computer generated image of what William and Harry would have looked like, had Charles been allowed to follow his own devices.

Exhibit B is another disturbing projection of the future progeny which Princes William and Harry would unleash if their severely compromised royal swimmers, floaters, twirlers and sinkers were allowed near an egg. 

As you can see, this remains a highly sensitive issue, and you didn't hear this from me, but a Mrs. Gwynyth Throatwarbler Sharpley of Thamesmead, is suspected of being harvested on four separate occasions.

So Mums the word eh?

ESCAPEONS OOT OF AFRICA

What am I missing? Oh yeah the link between Empirical Evidence and Belief! 

Before Darwin's theory 150 years ago Humans could be excused for believing in a magical supernatural cosmology wherein God plopped us down on the planet out of thin air....
and then in his infinite wisdom only told one f*cking guy about how his  universe works...
and left that one guy in charge of letting the rest of us know about it?
Really? 


That antiquated notion is simply too dangerous to be dropped in the lap of a few megalomaniacs who have proven time and time again,  that they usually edit and redraft all the good bits, and abuse it as a license to impose their will upon others, and enslave them.

When our common ancestors started traipsing oot of Africa it wasn't because they were bored, or looking for an IKEA. Some climatic disaster drove them away. Which is why I refer to us as Homo Escapeons. An Eon means "age" or "forever". We've been running away from our problems for Eons.

To this day most Humans seem more concerned with where they think they are going when they die, rather than finding out how we got here. Most Earthlings are shackled by superstitious beliefs that exist without any empirical evidence...dogmas which are eventually tweaked and manipulated to justify and absolve themselves of murdering, dominating, and controlling the proverbial others.

There are no others!

The earliest Humanish predecessors (Erectus, yes it's always funny) left Africa around 1.8 million years ago. Antecessor left 800,000 ya, then Heidelbergensis (future Neanderthals?) 600,000 ya, and finally us (Sapiens-Sapiens) around 60,000 ya.

Genetic evidence suggests that every single Earthling descended from a few thousand people about 70,000 years ago. This 'bottleneck' may have been brought about by a one of the world's largest know volcanic eruptions at Lake Toba (Sumatra, Indonesia), which plunged the planet into a 6 to 10 year volcanic winter, followed by a further 1,000 year period of cooling.
We left Africa to escape a changing climate.


The oldest known anatomically modern human is aboot 160,000 years old.
Every single Earthling shares a common ancestor dubbed Mitochondrial Eve, who had genetic markers that are shared by all of us. She lived roughly 120-150 ya...
okay enough with the numbers!

Once we were oot of Africa, we were primarily Beachcombers, and eventually we made it to Australia (40,000 ya) and eventually North America. In these new places we sapiens eventually "replaced" the earlier bunch of African escapees like the Neanderthals..who had a pretty good run ..about 400,000 years twice as long as we've been around .

Zip forward tens of thousands of years and here we are...
staring at all of this hardfought data from the past few hundred years that the Religious organizations tried to stop and are still trying to stop!


Instead of accepting that we are all rellies and combining our efforts to solve our myriad of dilemmas, we refuse on the grounds that some of having an exclusivity clause with the Almighty. Most religious leaders do everything within their considerable powers to cloak shared historical information from ever reaching their adherents...for obvious reasons.  

Most Earthlings are ordered to concentrate on the will of their supernatural God (to whom they claim exclusivity) so that they can escape THE END..whether THE END is their individual demise or that of the entire f*cking planet.

 Prospective global terminal disasters include but are not limited to:
solar flares, supernovae, black hole explosions or mergers, gamma-ray bursts, galactic center outbursts, pollution, geological disasters, human infertility, global nuclear warfare, pandemic viral infections,  all of which seem safe bets when compared to the various religious doomsday scenarios.

This gnashing of teeth is the result of watching Meryl Streep and Robert Redford in Out Of Africa. In that film Redford's character recognized that the natural world was on a collision with the Human world circa WW1.
I love the irony.

The imagery of the head-up-their-ass British Gentlemen's Club sipping G&Ts in the midst of the primal savagery and beauty of the Kenyan wilderness.
The British and German Royalty, cousins no less, have a territorial tiff to which the Gentleman merrily rush off to kill each other. Hear Hear!

We are ridiculous and we no longer have the luxury of ignoring the facts about who or what we are. It needs to stop.

Oot of Africa indeed!

THE ANALITY OF EVIL

What really frightens me...

WHY IS YESHUA'S BIRTHDAY A MYTHTERY?

Hmm, have you ever wondered why people celebrate Yeshua ben Yosuf's birthday in the middle of freakin' winter?

Call me crazy, but if you're planning to convince others that the turning point in the history of the entire universe was the miracle birth of a saviour, not only would it be the worst kept secret of all time, it would have probably been a good idea for someone to write down the actual day..
just sayin'?

Anyhoo, Yeshua's actual birthdate is as unknowable as the reason he waited in outer space during the millions of years of human evolution?
It's almost as if he spun the Earth, closed his eyes, and decided to drop in wherever his finger landed.

The best historical and scholarly guesstimaters tell us that Yeshua was prolly born in Nazareth, not Bethlehem, during April in the year 5 B.C. (Before Christ)..Got that?

December seems totally goofy because Yeshua prolly wasn't born after Rosh Hashana, which falls at different times during our "Julian" September because in Israel,  this is when the flocks came down out of the pastures and mountains and stayed in stables.

C'mon, you remember the quaint part of the story aboot the Shepherds who were out pretending to watch their flocks by night. The shepherds were totally amazed when an angel appeared before them and said Fear not, for I bring you great tidings of glad joy!

Here is my conception of what Glad Joy and her "great tidings" may have looked like.

Unfortunately, we're stuck with December 25th because of Constantine the Grrrrrreat!
aka Caesar-Flavius-Valerius-Aurelius-Constantinus-Augustus, who became sole ruler of  the Holey Roman Empire in 323.

Constantine's half-assed conversion to Christianity is debated by many scholars, however, he selected December 25th to celebrate Christmas because

A: it was a very calculated, politically-astute, manouever to circumvent Sol Invictus and overshadow the weeklong celebrations of Christianity's main rival,  Mithraism.
Along with their own pantheon of Roman Gods which they pretty much stole from the Greeks, the Romans had also enjoyed a long standing worhsip of Mithras, the Persian Sun god...
so basically just changing Sun to Son geddit?

B: plus the week ending Dec. 24 was the celebration of Saturnalia, which also wasn't very appropriate for baby Yeshua's birthday party due to the drunken debauchery and fertility rites which must have been super fun.

In closing we need to remember that Constantine 1 the Great is also famous for  
>being a Christian Saint and revered for his contributions to Christianity
>feeding defeated kings and their soldiers to the beasts in the amphitheater,
>decapitating and parading the head of rival Maxentius before sending it off to warn the "haters",
>poisoning his eldest son Crispus,
>and having his wife, the Empress Fausta, boiled to death at the request of his mother.

What a guy!
I hope that his helps.

Greeod is Good

IN GREEOD WE TRU$T

I watched the CARD GAME on Independent Lens/PBS the other night.
Did any of you see it? 
Let me begin with the premise that I suppose that a Free Market could in theory work fairly well if it was executed on a level playing field and people were able to manage their finances.

My Grandparent's Generation witnessed the Great Depression and didn't buy stuff until they had saved up enough money to do so. By the time that my Parent's Generation came around credit cards made it easier to get stuff before they could afford it.

My Generation wants everything (far more than they actually need) yesterday and now most of us can only dream of actually owning anything other than a bit of highly volatile equity.

The American Economy is the world's largest and most influential financial marketplace (for a few more years anyway) so for the time being, we cannot ignore it.

The recent financial landmine that Middle America flung itself upon was totally predictable... and yet We The People and their lobby-fed representatives, still let the "Banks" and their various tentacles, do whatever the hell they want.
WHY?

I've come to the conclusion that there are three main factors.
Fawlty Faith, the mirage of a Free Market, and unbridled Avarice. 
All one needs to do is look at the slogan on their one Dollar bill, "In God We Trust". Which should be changed to GREEOD?

For starters, atleast half of all Americans believe that Jesus is in charge of their finances. Like it or not, because so many American citizens adhere to their Faith above and beyond their Military Funding led Democracy, the USA is a defacto theocentric entity much like other Monotheistic states like Iranistan, which they despise.

One of the most perplexing situations is the average American's inexplicable addiction to the indoctrinated, ludicrous, notion  that the Creator of the Universe established the USA as the pinnacle of his plan for mankind.
Good Ole Manifest Destiny.

Yes, all 6,000 years of Human History has been Divinely premeditated and purposefully arranged for these "special" people at this precise moment in the Space/Time continuum.

Another dangerous part of this equation is that the guardians of the Free Market, like former Fed Grand Poohbah, Alan Greenspan, and the others before him, adhere to the notion that Capitalism cannot fail, because the forces of the Free Market will always correct itself. You can bet your bottom dollar on that and take it tothe Bank ;) 

Like the "Corporation", the Free Market is a living entity which is theoretically failsafe...so they fervently adhere to letting the chips fall where they may..what could possibly go wrong?

The other factor which is the glue holding it all together is pure Avarice.

Who can forget the great scene in the film Wall Street when Gord Gekko delivers his moving speech to the shareholders..
Greed is Good.

We hold these TRUTHS to be self evident, that Coveting thy Neighbours sh*t is the very foundation upon which the entire Economy exists. It's the American Dream to have way more sh*t than the Jones. 

For the chosen, exponential unlimited Government-Free growth is the Holy Grail at Ground Zero..this preposterous mixed-market governmentally tainted model would have never even be considered had the Great Depression mysteriously appeared.
Gee, how did the concentration of Capitalists enjoying unlimited-unregulated freedom to prey upon the public ever go wrong?

Surpassing the Jones, fuels the great unwashed to strive to have it all and then some,...atleast until the Rapture. I suggest purchasing this book..
How to profit from the coming rapture   

Rapturenomics 101!


It is backed up by the ridiculous Prosperity Gospel, which in itself is antithetical to the original proponent who was made famous for throwing the money changers out.
Doesn't anyone recall that bit about the Love of Money being the root of all evil? 
 

Don't worry about buying food tomorrow, or the surprise jump in your credit card rates, or your house being confiscated because you defaulted on your loans, no problemo...
GREEOD IS GOOD!


The Free Market is the living incarnation of GREEOD...
IT's will be done.

Cognitive Dissonance means simultaneously holding two contradictory ideas...ie both God & Greed are good.

As frustratingly obvious as this is, the Banks, that bailed-out Billionaire Club who gave themselves Billion$ in bonuses for f*cking up the economy & pooching the public, got a Get Out Of Jail card because what if they they had to pay for their mistakes like you or I do?

They'll take their glove and bat home and then nobody will get to play so nyeh!! 

Why don't the Americans storm the Bastille?
Why do they tolerate an Industry that preys upon them and then unbelievably has the gall to keep their bonus and and ask for a bailout?
It's abso-f*cking-lutely astonshing is what it is?


When the housing bubble burst the reigning Republicans had managed to gift the Banks with the keys to the candy store and nobody was monitoring them.


The Banks thrive on victimizing the Mr & Mrs Joe Sixpack who live paycheque to paycheque and who are the least able to withstand any bumps in their finances.

The Banks allowed these people to live on overdraft, get "free" credit cards, and over-mortgage their homes by 125%...so that they would rack up a new huge pile of debt on the cards which were borrowed against their over-valued homes to pay the cards off.

Woo-Hoooo!

Half of them believe that the Almighty is in charge of their finances because GOD loves them more than any other people in history.
I won't bore you with my usual litany of unanswerable questions..
such as..

Oh I don't know, WHY on Earth would GOD wait until the 1600s to plop his favorite folk in the already inhabited New World? Why would he intervene in human affairs long after we had been mucking about destroying local biospheres and murdering each other for hundreds of thousands of years?
Actually Millions of years if you want to get technical.

When the black-hearted professional Bank Lobbyists were interviewed on the program my blood began to boil. They said that "the People" are to blame for the glitch...the Banks didn't do anything wrong.
Which is frustratingly true.

This Generation knows nothing about saving their pennies until they can afford to purchase something.

So the perfect storm, this triumverate of Greed, God, and Entitlement, triumphed over the original parsimonious Puritan ethos. How ironic is that?

Do not be surprised if this house of cards folds like a cheap carnival tent and the "money" moves offshore to the East for good...
the East holds most of Uncle Sam's personal debt that he has racked up buying enough Military Weapons to kill every living human being tenfold. 
Another correction is imminent and it will be of Biblical proportions.

Unless?
Here's your chance to offer some sound, practical, financial advice...
like save string, start using public transit, and bring a bag lunch to work.

Go for it...

TOMORROW PEOPLE

Since I will be repeating my expedition to the memorial services at the Legislature I thought that I might as well re-post;

I have three World War One connections.

First and foremost is my Paternal Grandfather, Joseph Coppens, who left Nederbraakel, Belgium, in 1929.
He told me that a big part of the reason was because of the occupation of his village by the Germans during WW1 and he never wanted to live through that again.

He was only 23 years old and the only member of his family to emigrate to Canada.

The second connection is that I had the medals of Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae who wrote In_Flanders_Fields .

I sold them in 1997 thinking that they would be better off in the care of a Collector.
The medals soon went to auction and sold for nearly $500,000. The new owner donated them to a Museum, McCrae_House , where they belong.

The incident became a national story and you can read about my ordeal in my archive June 8, 2006.

Willy Coppens, who was the Flying Ace of Belgium.

My third connection to WW1, is my Grandfather's distant cousin, or so he told me when I was a lad,

Archive Aug 19, 2006.

So this Rememberance Day my good-lady-wife, youngest son and I went to the Legislative Grounds to pay our respects.

The canon fire was so terrifyingly LOUD

that I thought that all of the windows in the surrounding office buildings were going to shatter.

We decided to tour inside the Legislative Building after the ceremony.

Afterall it is a magnificent edifice.

Our Provincial mascot is the Bison which were "once the most numerous single species of large wild mammal on Earth" which were so mercilessly slaughtered in North America from 1820 to 1880 that their numbers were reduced from an estimated 30 million to 1,000...a fitting metaphor for the plunder of the New World eh?

We took a photo of this incredible "mural depicting Canadian army life in France during the First World War painted by Frank Brangwyn of London, England, one of Europe's finest muralists. The mural portrays the carnage and tragic sacrifice of war but bright flowers in the foreground herald the coming of peace."

I started to imagine what it would be like to work there...

...hmm

I could be a model of society..

no really..literally..

like a wax figure of the average citizen?

No. I must aim higher!

I couldn't be Minister of Healthy Living..

as a germaphobe I nearly barfed just thinking about all of the germs on that doorknob.

Water Conservation only reminded me about how badly I needed to find the biffy.

We passed by Family Services so I teased my son about trading him in if he didn't behave!

No  answer.

I pretended to be the Minister of Science & Technology as the other Tourists wandered by..



Wow!

Working on a Civic Holiday, what dedication.

I told a young couple passing by that I was working on providing free internet

heh heh heh.

I'm afraid that I prolly wouldn't do well in Government because of all the bloody rules that the guy in this office tries to enforce..

hey protocol this!

So as you can see, I enjoyed many of my freedoms today,

but I did not forget the terrible price that it cost others.

"If you don't know your past,
you don't know your future.

Tomorrow People,

today is here."

Ziggy Marley.