age gap, father’s friend, forbidden, a little enemies to lovers, push and pull, fwb, grumpy and semi reclusive H who is NOT a man ho, likeabl3.5 stars
age gap, father’s friend, forbidden, a little enemies to lovers, push and pull, fwb, grumpy and semi reclusive H who is NOT a man ho, likeable h who has abandonment issues and cares deeply, semi slow burn in the first half, LOTS of sexual tension and cute and sweet moments...
what’s not to love?
BUT...
last half was just meh for me. they were so cute and sweet but too much fade to black scenes and time jumps for me and not a lot happening so i ended up skimming it.
Merged review:
3.5 stars
age gap, father’s friend, forbidden, a little enemies to lovers, push and pull, fwb, grumpy and semi reclusive H who is NOT a man ho, likeable h who has abandonment issues and cares deeply, semi slow burn in the first half, LOTS of sexual tension and cute and sweet moments...
what’s not to love?
BUT...
last half was just meh for me. they were so cute and sweet but too much fade to black scenes and time jumps for me and not a lot happening so i ended up skimming it....more
"I love you... a crazy fucking amount," she whispered... "I love you too-" my voice cracked... "Most in the world."
you know those type of long "I love you... a crazy fucking amount," she whispered... "I love you too-" my voice cracked... "Most in the world."
you know those type of long ass books where you're satisfied but you still want more? yeah, that's how i feel reading this book and it's rare for me to feel this way. it's a perfect contradiction, really.
i don't know what to say but JUST. READ. THIS. BOOK. it's perfect. it literally has everything i never knew i needed. it's long because it has a lot of showing than telling. reading this, it honestly felt like i was there with all the characters, i didn't feel disconnected or anything because the characters felt so real.
the first book ended with a cliffhanger and this was the continuation of everything unresolved. Johnny FINALLY pulled his head outta his ass so him and Shannon are a couple, so everything that didn't happen in the first book, definitely happened here... if ya know what i mean.
"I'm going to keep you," he whispered... "if that's okay?" "That's definitely okay," I breathed... "I want you to keep me."
honestly, there's so much going on in this book and i dont wanna give anything away so imma just list out everything i love:
bromance & friendships: Gibsie's love for our H, Johnny, was just so UGHHHHH *insert a million heart eyes*. it was too cute for words. Gibise was so loyal and supportive with everything Johnny. i mean, there's so many scenes that made me love their friendship like the scene where Gibsie cried when Johnny was leaving for rugby, when Gibsie sat on *ahem* "tissues" because, ya know, teenage boys and their hormones, when Gibsie acted like a proud mom whenever Johnny accomplishes something, and when Gibsie was always there for Johnny when tragedy happened... WE NEED MORE MALE FRIENDSHIPS LIKE THIS.
and the bond between Claire and our h, Shannon? fucking great. Claire is definitely the female version of Gibsie and their sisterhood/friendship made me so happy, especially after what Shannon has gone through.
Johnny, Gibsie & Shannon's brothers i LOVED all of Shannon's brothers (except for Darren, he's aight). all her brothers are crazy and loveable, i mean how can i not love Tahdg, the 11-year-old potty mouth with no filter; Ollie, the most innocent and cutest 9-year-old kid who hustled Johnny for money and who is not ashamed of his cute lil tummy; Sean, the 3-year-old kid who made me aww so many times; and Joey, the second oldest of all the siblings and who basically raised/protected all of them from their abusive father and neglectful mother.
and Johnny's and Gibsie's (yes, I'm counting him), relationship with all of the brothers was so heartwarming to read. those kids was literally living in a nightmare for a looooong time and when Johnny supposedly "kidnapped" the baby brothers and took them to McDonalds and the park just because he knew they were all hungry was just so cute and adorable, my heart couldn't take it. and the scenes between Gibsie the manchild and the kids were one of the funniest things i've ever read.
Claire & Gibsie yes, yes. i know i've been going on and on about Gibsie but he's honestly the best character here. he completely outshines everyone, even the MCs. not even sorry that im completely more invested in Claire's and Gibsie's love story than Shannon's and Johnny's.
i mean, them being best friends since childhood and have been in love with each other since forever but of course, something happened and now Gibsie is a man ho and all that but still loves and protects Claire fiercely. honestly, I dislike characters/heroes who supposedly love the girl but goes on to be a man ho, but he still does things to the girl he "loves" that clearly shows how much he loves her but they're a "coward" and all that. thank god Gibsie didn't rub any of his OW escapades to Claire and i'm pretty sure he wasn't with anyone in this book, except for that creepy secretary. yeah, i dislike characters like him in other books but Gibsie was just... idk how to describe him because my words don't do him justice but just know that he's fan-fuckin-tastic.
they're story is literally the same as Knight's and Luna's from Broken Knight but in my opinion, Claire and Gibise are way more adorable and loveable and i just know their story is gonna make me cry.
"She freewheeled my hormones out of control and KO'd my heart"
anyways, I can't wait to read Joey's (Shannon's older brother) book and i DEFINITELY cannot wait for Claire and Gibsie's book
tw: emotional and physical abuse (scenes from the past) & murder/arson (off-page)
Merged review:
"I love you... a crazy fucking amount," she whispered... "I love you too-" my voice cracked... "Most in the world."
you know those type of long ass books where you're satisfied but you still want more? yeah, that's how i feel reading this book and it's rare for me to feel this way. it's a perfect contradiction, really.
i don't know what to say but JUST. READ. THIS. BOOK. it's perfect. it literally has everything i never knew i needed. it's long because it has a lot of showing than telling. reading this, it honestly felt like i was there with all the characters, i didn't feel disconnected or anything because the characters felt so real.
the first book ended with a cliffhanger and this was the continuation of everything unresolved. Johnny FINALLY pulled his head outta his ass so him and Shannon are a couple, so everything that didn't happen in the first book, definitely happened here... if ya know what i mean.
"I'm going to keep you," he whispered... "if that's okay?" "That's definitely okay," I breathed... "I want you to keep me."
honestly, there's so much going on in this book and i dont wanna give anything away so imma just list out everything i love:
bromance & friendships: Gibsie's love for our H, Johnny, was just so UGHHHHH *insert a million heart eyes*. it was too cute for words. Gibise was so loyal and supportive with everything Johnny. i mean, there's so many scenes that made me love their friendship like the scene where Gibsie cried when Johnny was leaving for rugby, when Gibsie sat on *ahem* "tissues" because, ya know, teenage boys and their hormones, when Gibsie acted like a proud mom whenever Johnny accomplishes something, and when Gibsie was always there for Johnny when tragedy happened... WE NEED MORE MALE FRIENDSHIPS LIKE THIS.
and the bond between Claire and our h, Shannon? fucking great. Claire is definitely the female version of Gibsie and their sisterhood/friendship made me so happy, especially after what Shannon has gone through.
Johnny, Gibsie & Shannon's brothers i LOVED all of Shannon's brothers (except for Darren, he's aight). all her brothers are crazy and loveable, i mean how can i not love Tahdg, the 11-year-old potty mouth with no filter; Ollie, the most innocent and cutest 9-year-old kid who hustled Johnny for money and who is not ashamed of his cute lil tummy; Sean, the 3-year-old kid who made me aww so many times; and Joey, the second oldest of all the siblings and who basically raised/protected all of them from their abusive father and neglectful mother.
and Johnny's and Gibsie's (yes, I'm counting him), relationship with all of the brothers was so heartwarming to read. those kids was literally living in a nightmare for a looooong time and when Johnny supposedly "kidnapped" the baby brothers and took them to McDonalds and the park just because he knew they were all hungry was just so cute and adorable, my heart couldn't take it. and the scenes between Gibsie the manchild and the kids were one of the funniest things i've ever read.
Claire & Gibsie yes, yes. i know i've been going on and on about Gibsie but he's honestly the best character here. he completely outshines everyone, even the MCs. not even sorry that im completely more invested in Claire's and Gibsie's love story than Shannon's and Johnny's.
i mean, them being best friends since childhood and have been in love with each other since forever but of course, something happened and now Gibsie is a man ho and all that but still loves and protects Claire fiercely. honestly, I dislike characters/heroes who supposedly love the girl but goes on to be a man ho, but he still does things to the girl he "loves" that clearly shows how much he loves her but they're a "coward" and all that. thank god Gibsie didn't rub any of his OW escapades to Claire and i'm pretty sure he wasn't with anyone in this book, except for that creepy secretary. yeah, i dislike characters like him in other books but Gibsie was just... idk how to describe him because my words don't do him justice but just know that he's fan-fuckin-tastic.
they're story is literally the same as Knight's and Luna's from Broken Knight but in my opinion, Claire and Gibise are way more adorable and loveable and i just know their story is gonna make me cry.
"She freewheeled my hormones out of control and KO'd my heart"
anyways, I can't wait to read Joey's (Shannon's older brother) book and i DEFINITELY cannot wait for Claire and Gibsie's book
tw: emotional and physical abuse (scenes from the past) & murder/arson (off-page)...more
love how the disclaimer for this book really says:
"Sebastian Garcia is not the 'sweet kind of guy'. If you are not into strong-willed
1.5 stars ✩⋆
love how the disclaimer for this book really says:
"Sebastian Garcia is not the 'sweet kind of guy'. If you are not into strong-willed men, you will be by the end of this book."
and you're probably wondering, is this Sebastian Garcia dude really not the 'sweet kind of guy'? weeelll lemme show you what Sebastian (H) says the third time he meets the heroine // WARNING for all the poor, unfortunate innocent souls out there this quote ⤵ is NSFW //
"Get on your knees and suck my dick, you dirty whore."
sooo, you be the judge of whether or not this Sebastian Garcia dude is the "sweet kind of guy" while i go bleach my eyes please and thx.
honestly, i'm glad the disclaimer was there in the beginning because holy shit. the annoyance? the anger? the infuriation? the annoyance (had to repeat this twice)? it was UN-fucking-PARALLELED. i just wanted to slap both Sebastian Garcia (H) and April Bennett (h) with my slippers the whole entire time and i'm not even exaggerating.
『 P L O T (??) 』
and as for the plot? well, as the wise words of the almighty withcindy said, BITCH, WHAT FUCKING PLOT?! WHERE IS IT?? WHERE'S THE FUCKING PLOT?!? YOU LOOK ME IN THE EYES RIGHT NOW AND YOU TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF PLOT THERE WAS! just know that 1 horny idiot + another horny idiot = this whole book. okay? okay.
but ughhh fine if you wanna know,
↳ all that ever happened was April has a crush on Sebastian when he goes to the cafe she works at and visits only a couple of times, she accepts a job from a "gentleman's club" (y'all know what this means) then the manager for that place was like nuh uh honey you're gonna be one of our Escape Girls (don't pretend you don't know what this means), her first and only client is - surprise, surprise - horny idiot #1: Sebastian Garcia. they have sex for 7 days, miscommunication happens and then BOOM- a six-year time jump occurs.
and what do they do when they meet again? THEY FIGHT AND HAVE SEX. that's it. i'm not even joking this is all they ever do for the entire book it was exhausting oh my god.
『 C H A R A C T E R S 』
but moving on, let's talk about April Bennett (h) shall we? first of all, can we just take a moment and acknowledge the fact that she really said this about Sebastian: "He looks like he may be European or something." and i genuinely got confused because wait a damn minute-
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you're in London... London is in Europe... Europe = European... ... of-fuckin'-course he's gonna look "European" you dumbass ?!?
but this isn't the only quote where i questioned my sanity because y'all look at these:
↳ “This is true. Speak tomoz. xoxo."
seriously. who the f says toMoZ? tell me one person who says this right now. i'm waiting.
↳ "I have an alias now. How gangster."
sounds about ʸᵗ
↳ "He looks like he may be European or something."
yes, i'm repeating this because if i suffer, y'all need to as well ...more
#1 reason why this book is entertaining : the male main character was suffering the entire book.
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this. this is the content i love.
this book ha#1 reason why this book is entertaining : the male main character was suffering the entire book.
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this. this is the content i love.
this book had me intrigued because, i love groveling and i heard this book is just full of the hero groveling so alas here i am. this is about Theresa (h) finally having enough with her husband's, Sandro (H), neglectful and dickhead attitude since they've been married for 18 months and asking for a divorce. Sandro, not knowing that his wife didn't know that their marriage was "arranged" and genuinely loved him finally gets his head out of his ass and grovels especially since spoiler // Theresa is pregnant // but too little too late now i guess.
“I'm your husband...” “No. You are not my husband,” she interrupted in a voice thickened with hatred and tears. “You have never been my husband. A husband loves, honours and cherishes! A husband is a lover and a champion... Look into the next room if you want to see what a real husband is, because you are no such thing!”
and honestly? other books with supposed "groveling" isn't enough for me. you think 2 chapters of telling >>> showing of the hero groveling or doing a ONE speech or public gesture or naming a cloud after them is enough for me?
HELL. NO.
what is worse is that the heroine, most of the time, just forgives the hero after ONE speech. yeah, that's a no for me. i need 10 chapters - minimum - of the hero begging for the heroine's forgiveness and the heroine making the hero work hard for it until i, as the reader, am satisfied with the groveling because seriously,
LET. THE. MAN. SUFFER.
anywho, going back to the book, Theresa really made Sandro suffer the entire book and rightfully so. when i tell you she did not forgive Sandro the entire book and made him work for it til the very end? i mean it.
"You know what it’s like when you have an overwhelming urge to scrape the touch, the smell, the very essence of someone off your skin, don’t you? After all, that’s what you usually do thirty seconds after your orgasm, and I can finally relate to that."
sis did not wake up and choose violence, she IS violence.
-`,✎ WHY NOT A HIGHER RATING?
first of all, Sandro is kinda dumb. no- actually, he's fully dumb. throughout the book he was groveling and working hard to earn his wife's forgiveness right? right. what i don't understand is why he keeps hanging out with the OW, Francesca, aka his ex girlfriend that Theresa thought he has loved this whole entire time, whenever he goes back to Italy to visit his family. i know that his family forces him to hang out with his ex but dancing with her? hugging her and putting his arms around her shoulders? kissing her cheeks? laughing with her and knowing that there's paparazzi everywhere meaning he knows that his wife will probably see them pictured together?
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sir, explain yourself.
and also, he must've known that the media was talking shit about his wife right? he could've literally protected Theresa and told the paparazzi's to shut the fuck up and shut the rumors down about him and Francesca but he never did any of this. so see, this is why we need Sandro's POV in this book because yes, everything was written in Theresa's POV. plus, i just wanted to feel his pain and regret, and i wanna know his train of thought whenever he would go to Italy while his family is forcing him to hang out with his ex. and for those who want to know, this is his mindset about his ex:
"I don't love Francesca. I don't think I've ever loved her. Maybe when I married you, for about five seconds, I believed that I did. But I was disabused of that notion pretty damned early on in our marriage. I don't love her and I have no idea why the hell you're so fixated on her."
now, do y'all see what i mean by Sandro being a dumbass? i HaVe No IdeA wHy yoU'Re fIxAtEd On HeR... dude.
also, for those who want to know, no he never cheated but he did pretend to be with random women the whole time they were married and Theresa thought he was maybe cheating. and he knew this would hurt her. so the fact that he doesn't know why his wife is "fixated" on his ex and he knows that the paparazzi are taking pictures of them together... boy, i wonder why your wife is fixated on her, you dumbass.
i know i said i like that Sandro was suffering but these two fought the ENTIRE book. i just wanted more sweet moments between them because their arguments were getting a little tiresome and a bit repetitive. i just wish there were at least past scenes that shows us how Sandro has treated Theresa as it was all telling >>> showing. and because of this and the fact i only saw him as an asshole in the first chapter, i started to feel bad for Sandro and we don't want that because Theresa really was ruthless (deservedly so).
───── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ─────
again, i just wish we have more of Sandro's POV because we just get his side of things literally waaay at the end in a long ass speech. and even though he's trying to win his wife back, why the f can't he just tell her the truth from the very beginning about Francesca instead of stressing his pregnant wife out for the whole 9 months of her pregnancy??
What. An. Idiot.
if you guys want to be stressed and wanna read about a hero suffering the entire book then i recommend this!!
well this was kind of a mess. i should not read friends to lovers books back to back - *cough* malina *cough* - they're giving me a headac2.5 stars ✩⋆
well this was kind of a mess. i should not read friends to lovers books back to back - *cough* malina *cough* - they're giving me a headache.
friends to lovers/unrequited trope would always be a double-edged sword for me because sometimes, the angst is just *chefs kiss* even though there are some elements that i absolutely loathe and i guess i just love stressing myself out so sometimes i like it, i even welcome it so there's that. but sometimes... it's just- well, (childhood) friends to lovers usually goes like this:
1. girl and boy are childhood bffs 2. girl has been in love with boy since forever but boy is obviously a blind dumbass 3. girl stays in the sidelines (never dating and is a virgin- this is very specific by the way) while boy becomes, you guessed it, a ✨ho✨ 4. someone is suddenly interested in the girl, boy finally gets his head outta his ass and "sees" his best friend for the first time because obviously when another dude is sniffing around it's unacceptable.
and well, ya know. this is annoying af because you're telling me if there hasn't been another man interested in the best friend, the boy wouldn't have "seen" the girl?? yeah, no.
for the most part, this is exactly what happened here but the difference is there are TWO girls in the trio of best friends, Liv (OW), Bloom (h) and Carter (H). Carter noticed Liv first and had a thing with her for a couple months and then Benj (OM) suddenly comes along and shows interest in Bloom so obviously that's when Carter started "seeing" Liv for the first time. so there's this weird love square thing in the first half.
i did like some parts as i thought the sexual tension was immaculate and the writing was good! i can also appreciate the author giving a trigger warning in the beginning (spoilers // h's dad committed suicide) so thanks for that. if you like angst, and have no qualms about love square drama, then you'd like this.
but anyways, because of the dumbassery of the characters imma rant a little bit so,
✧✦ SPOILERS AHEAD ✦✧
we know Liv and Carter have been keeping their "thing" a secret while Bloom is "sister-zoned" for 2 months(?) now but obviously Bloom isn't a dumbass
"It's in the way he watches her sometimes, in the moments she's looking away or laughing at someone else's joke. It's in the intensity of his gaze when she's off on her own. He's always watching her, in different ways than he usually watches me."
that's lovely.
and you know, in almost all of these childhood friends to lovers books i've read, it's usually just the main characters having special connection right? well here, both Liv and Bloom are equally close to him because they've all been best friends since they were kids buuuut again, he noticed Liv first
"I like her, I do. More than a friend, definitely. She's bright and beautiful and supportive. She's hardworking and devoted and funny as hell when she wants to be. I definitely enjoy making out with her, and I love how she knows what she's doing."
first of all ew (because he thought about this even after he kissed Bloom). and second, im still salty about this by the way because eeeww. and Carter was exploring a relationship with her until Benj comes along and Carter finds out that Bloom is a virgin... and now suddenly Carter has all these feelings for Bloom just because of... this..??
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i'm not convinced whatsoever because i mean- that fast? really? is he a fucking gemini is that it (no offense to geminis by the way, as a virgo i love geminis)? how can one's feelings switch up so quickly and so strongly i don't understand. and then this lovely scene comes up where Carter and Liv are making out, touching her ass and grinding on each other (around 32%), even after Carter started to have all these feelings for Bloom and we find out that these two have actually been making out behind Bloom's back for a couple of months now.
"But damn she feels good, and it's not like we haven't kissed or made out before. We have, far too many times than I'd like to admit, and for some reason, a jolt of guilt sparks in my chest when I think about the fact that Bloom hasn't known for a while."
hahaha *eye twitches* that's cute.
and you know, what happens next?? you guys know what happens next??? well, this dick went to Blooms workshop because she was upset and well, one thing lead to another, and they hook up when he literally just made out with the OW moments ago. and this isn't the only time by the way, a week goes by and he's still spending time with Liv (idk if they did anything) and during his football game Liv kisses Carter, Bloom goes to the bathroom because she saw this and then Carter kisses her, AND THEN she goes out to stargaze with Benj AND THEN makes out with him, goes home because she's confused af AND THENNN hooks up with Carter...
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so basically, they're all just exchanging DNA's at this point i guess. Chuck? Blair? Serena? Nate?? is that you?
silverlining tho, Carter ended it with Liv faster than Bloom ended it with Benj. i also like the fact Carter longed for Bloom more and Bloom wasn't hung up on Carter but obviously, her feelings with Benj was annoying as hell too. but guess what!! this isn't the end of this weird ass love square by the way, we find out that Liv and Benj were sleeping together behind both of Carter and Bloom's back so here i am thinking... wtf was the point??? and y'all know how they found out? huh? well, Carter and Bloom hid in a closet because they heard a couple going inside the room, said couple was Liv and Benj, they start having sex, and Carter and Bloom watch while, ya know, Carter touches her... yeah.
in conclusion, everything is a mess and they're all f a k e f r i e n d s
honestly, i just couldn't connect with all of the characters because they annoyed me too much. and Carter's feelings switched real fast and when i mean fast, i mean in a day. he had genuine feelings for Liv who he most likely shares the same connection he has with Bloom and then when he finds out about Benj and the fact she's a virgin he suddenly has these intense feelings for Bloom? he went on and on about how he was exploring a relationship with Liv and suddenly he doesn't care anymore and just wants to bone Bloom? nah i don't buy it.
and that whole love square resolution wasn't really addressed properly. like, does Carter still have not-so-friendly feelings for Liv? did Liv even have real feelings for Carter? or was she using him to make Benj jealous? were Liv and Benj sleeping with each other this whole time? i need answers pls.
✦✧ ✧✦
there are some cute parts here that i liked, the pottery scene inspired by the movie Ghost? *chefs kiss* (but obviously Carter making out with Liv before this scene happened tainted things). and i do actually like the writing and how i can feel the longing from the characters (mostly on Carter's side). and the storyline with the dad made me tear up a little bit that was really sad.
but ugh i just can't with the love square drama y'all.
anyways, if there's a book about Liv and Benj, i ain't opposed to reading their side honestly. i wanna know why they're dumb af so there's that....more
im sorry but this is literally the off brand version of Motorcycle Man frfr.
listen, listen. i liked the beginning of this especially sinc1.5 stars ✩⋆
im sorry but this is literally the off brand version of Motorcycle Man frfr.
listen, listen. i liked the beginning of this especially since it reminded me of Motorcyle Man because Buck (H) is the leader of an MC, he and Clara (h) slept the same night they met, Buck also has 2 kids, etc. BUT the only difference is that Buck didn't sleep with another woman the next day, forgetting Clara (yes, i'm still salty Tack did that).
KA wrote some of my all-time favorite comfort reads and there's so many things i love in KA books like the side characters, ridiculous rock chick situations, and yes, i even like the overly macho man behavior (most of the time not all the time) but this was just... problematic and a little concerning. there's just SO many situations here where i just go
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so anyways, i'm just gonna rant and talk about the things that irked me here cuz i gotta let my feelings and frustrations out so
《 SPOILERS AHEAD 》
⇢ worst girl friends i've ever read in a book
what the fuck.. no seriously. what the fuck. these "friends" of Clara are quite literally the worst girl friends i've ever read. i- IM SO SALTY right now because seriously?? are y'all dumb?
ok so for context, ⤷ after Clara and her "biker babes" went shopping for the day, they went back to the MC compound where Clara sees Nails (OW) and Buck look comfy because he has his hands on her waist and it looks like they're kissing from her view so she thinks he's cheating on her because basically they're "together" since she lives with him (yes Buck pulled a typical KA H move where he forces the h to live with him because she's in danger).
and then after she sees this horrible scene, do you guys think her girl friends aka biker babes helped her and told her to leave him? told her that he's not worth it and she doesn't deserve this especially when she just divorced her cheating husband of 10 years?? huh? HUHHHH? nope. this is what they said instead:
"They do what they wanna do when they wanna do it with who they wanna do it. You're his woman, babe, you gotta know that's the way and you gotta keep your mouth shut and put up with it. You do not give him shit, even if he comes home smellin' of her. You just keep your mouth shut."
i- ma'am,,, come again?
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i've come across some very stupid advice from KA heroine's friends
↳ Exhibit A:The Golden Dynasty Circe's friends told her that she should sleep with Lahn the whole night before they pillage a town so he's all "sexed up" and wouldn't be tempted to r*pe someone during the pillage because god forbid they can't control themselves.
↳ Exhibit B:At Peace Violet's friend, Cheryl, told her she should use Mike (OM) and string him along even though he recently divorced his wife who also used him but i guess it's alright to use and string this poor man along because she's "innocent" and "naive"
see? those are some headscratchers right? well the advice here was just plain stupid.
i swear if my friends gave me this advice, i will give them the nastiest side-eye ever and never talk to them again. they just lost my trust if they said this to me because seriously? COME ON. these biker babes are really excusing the "cheating" and is basically on the cheater's side because that is their "way of life" and she should just smile and stfu about it and just let the men do whatever tf they want.
"Babe, you gotta know you can do this. I know it sucks, and it does. It sucks. But it is the way it is. You ask no questions, they tell no lies. They need to be free and you gotta let them be that way."
this book has the biggest "you wish that was you huh" energy.
do i wish that i have a coworker who looks like clark kent wh**spoiler alert** 4 stars ✩⋆
this book has the biggest "you wish that was you huh" energy.
do i wish that i have a coworker who looks like clark kent who is secretly in love with me and is willing to be my fake boyfriend at my sister's wedding in Spain because my ex is engaged and i don't want my relatives to feel pity, who would buy me 5 fish tacos even though i asked for 4 fish tacos, smuggles doughnut for me, whose favorite movie is Up, and is the definition of ride-or-die?
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yes. yes i do.
✧ p l o t & t r o p e s
⭒ fake relationship ⭒ office romance // similar to the the hating game ⭒ banter + slowburn // almost mariana zapata type of slowburn if you know what i mean ⭒ one-sided enemies to rivals to semi-friends to lovers ⭒ grumpy/sunshine trope ⭒ unrequited love // the dude was in love with the oblivious girl
↳ ok so Catalina Fernandez (h) needs a fake date to her sisters wedding because, as it turns out, the groom's brother is her ex, 6 years before she moved to nyc, and that relationship is the reason why she has trust/commitment issues. so, she lied to her family and told them she has a boyfriend and lo and behold, her rival coworker, Aaron Blackford (H), offers himself up as her fake date for her sister's wedding.
so yeah, this was a cute slowburn book and honestly? it made me feel single so if a book makes you feel like this, you know it's cute.
BEWARE OF SPOILERS AHEAD
╭⋟─────── *.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.* ───────╮
first and foremost, we're gonna talk about the most important thing in this book:
✧ C A T A L I N A
↳ "Exactly. In the same way that I haven't forgotten David Benioff and D.B. Weiss did to us on May 19, 2019... Didn't Daenerys Stormborn of the House Targaryen, First of Her Name deserve better than that?"
ugh. love it when fictional characters telekinetically share the same brainwave as me when it comes to my nonfictional opinions.
why is this the most important thing in this book you ask? because KHALEESI DOES DESERVE BETTER!! but anywho.
i knew from the very first page that Aaron was in love with her. i mean, the first line of this book was Aaron saying, "i'll be your date to the wedding" and i KNEW- i just knew this man is simping. and honestly, from the very beginning it's definitely obvious that the dude is in to her but Catalina is too oblivious to know because she's blinded by her one-sided hatred and unfortunately, this annoyed the hell out of me not gonna lie.
because first of all, i have one question for the heroine: HOW ARE YOU NOT IN LOVE HUH???
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no seriously im confused. because for me, if a grumpy, ex football player, who looks like clark fucking kent did all the things that aaron did to catalina do to me where he bought her not 1, not 4, but 5 fish tacos, knows all about you because he listens, not a ho- i repeat NOT A HO because he's "saving it for someone who's worth it", tries to learn spanish for you and your family, and is willing to travel across the world with you just to pretend to be your fake boyfriend without expecting anything back?
back arched. knees bent. throat open. I. AM. READY.
and this is saying a lot because i'm a picky bitch with high standards. and to be honest, this book really made me realize that the bar is set so low for men because when Aaron bought her 5 fish tacos (yes, im stuck with the fish tacos. it's food, what about it?) i swooned. unashamedly. and then he looks like this sexy ass man?
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... ??? one more:
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... *screams* *punches air* *cries in the corner*
also, let's talk about Catalina pushing Aaron away till the very end of the book for a second though because usually, if you know me, i'm more likely to be annoyed with the male main character because, well, they're dumbasses 99.9% of the time but i was more annoyed with the female main character in this one- not that she's a dumbass by the way, but the fact that she was so oblivious when it was so obvious that Aaron is in love with her for the most part.
i was just screaming at Catalina 85% of the time, GIRL ARE YOU DENSE?! THAT MAN IS IN LOVE WITH YOU AND WANTS TO RAIL YOU 24/7 HOW CAN YOU NOT- *sigh* anyways.
i think the fact that i already knew he was in love with her from the very beginning made me more annoyed because sometimes, she was just being so unfairly rude to him and im like?? girl?? it's so obvious?? and the fact that i know this is supposed to be enemies to lovers, but again, the enemies part was more one-sided so honestly, i just felt bad for the dude. i usually don't mind when the girl pushes the guy away, i actually LOVE when this happens because i love reading the "chase" but again, when the "hate" is one-sided, it's just less exciting and more frustrating especially when she's hesitant until the very end.
(spoilers) and especially with the drama at the end?? when she broke things off so easily just like that? ugh. i was so annoyed y'all. but again, i do understand where she was coming from and how her past trauma can make her more hesitant. but still.
it also doesn't help that Aaron is literally perfect. this was me in the last half:
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what am i doing you ask? well, obviously, i'm looking for flaws because i'm a judgemental bitch when it comes to fictional characters and i saw none. NONE. no seriously i'm not joking. this fictional man is perfect. especially in the last half when they finally went to the wedding. this man...? no flaws whatsoever. well actually, he does have one and it's just him not telling Catalina his feelings from the very beginning. but that's it!! seriously!!
i even wish he was more of an asshole because he was scarily too perfect for me. but you know what? with perfection comes with a little... i won't say boredom buuut... something close to that. i just wish he had more depth honestly but that's it.
➵ ex drama (spoilers) for those who want to know, there's a little bit of OM/ex drama here since again, one of the main reasons why Catalina needs a fake date is because her ex, Daniel, is engaged. he was Catalina's old professor and first love. but when students were suddenly slut shaming her just because she was dating her former professor, Daniel did nothing to protect her and he broke things off. after all this, she then moved to NYC and 4 years later she meets Aaron and 1.5 years after that, that's where the book begins. there's no OW drama.
╰─────── *.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.* ───────⋞╯
i actually dont mind that the dynamic is similar to the hating game because i love the whole dude is in love with the girl but girl is oblivious and thinks the dude hates them trope. because that... that's the one. it reminds me of old KA and MZ books and ugh it's just nostalgic. i have been looking for a book with similar THG vibes so im glad this book exists.
so if you like your typical slowburn book where it's emotional connection >>> smut, sexual tension through cute mundane scenes (y'all know what i'm talking about), bed sharing trope (!!!), and the male main character implicitly showing that he's in love with the female main character but doesn't explicitly say he's in love with her till the end, then i recommend this.
can't wait to read more books by this author ♡...more
so we’re all collectively suffering again this time of year by reading dramione fics huh?
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first read (2021) — 4.75 reread — upgraded to 5 stars ✩⋆
so we’re all collectively suffering again this time of year by reading dramione fics huh?
* * *
first read (2021) — 4.75 stars ✩⋆
this ✨dramione✨ fic is one of the most depressing things i've ever read and i fucking love it.
everyone- and i mean everyone was raving about this on tiktok so i was like ehh okay i'll read this. it's dark? depressing? soul-crushing? everyone died? voldy and the death eaters won the war? hell yes.
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my shipping status is a mess okay? bear with me. ➵ movies: harry x hermione // there's a reason why PoA is my favorite. ➵ books: ron x hermione // that slowburn, friends to lovers, bicker like an old married couple dynamic? fuuuuck yes. ➵ fanon: DRAMIONE ALL THE FUCKING WAY // the enemies to lovers, complex anti-heroes that only have a soft spot for the person they love and has a grey moral background just hits different.
✧ p l o t
↳ it has been at least 2 years since Voldy won the war and killed Harry Potter and tortured everyone from the Order. after 16 months of being in solitary confinement Voldy discovered that Hermione is hiding something from her memories.
he decides to put her in the breeding program where the surviving females of the Order act as a "surrogate" for his death eaters because the fertility rates are low amongst the purebloods. Hermione is assigned to Voldy's right-hand man who is none other than Draco-fucking-Malfoy aka the High Reeve aka Voldy's General.
so yeah anyways, i fucking loved this. there's no point in sugar coating anything. this was, as Ronald would say, bloody brilliant. this didn't even feel like a fanfic because the writing is that good. and @SenLinYu and @AVENDELL bishhhh i fucking love y'all thank you for creating this masterpiece and the most beautiful, yet haunting fanfic/fanart i've ever seen.
➵ TW: rape, attempted rape, violence, torture, mass murder, war, physical and mental abuse, just- EVERYTHING. this book is really dark right off the bat so keep that in mind.
p.s. this is gonna be a long ass review because i have so much emotions and i need to let it out so thx for listening to my ted talk in advance ♡
\\ WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD AND MY INNER NERD IS GONNA COME OUT IN THIS REVIEW DON'T JUDGE ME //
･ﾟﾟ･｡｡･ﾟﾟ･ PART I: HANDMAIDS TALE 2.0 ･ﾟﾟ･｡｡･ﾟﾟ･．
➵ November 2004 - March 2005
of-fucking-course this book starts with Umbridge "accidentally" leaving Hermione in solitary confinement for 16 months. that bitch. you know, i've always wondered what it was like if Voldy won the war. like what would happen ya know? but then-
"Then [Lucius Malfoy] cast a curse that turned Ron's blood gradually into molten lead. Hermione watched as the curse slowly crept through Ron's body, destroying him from the inside out... They had left Molly for last. So she'd watch all her children die... Remus had lasted hours longer than anyone else. His lycanthropy kept healing him until he just hung there, unresponsive. Finally, someone shot the Killing Curse at him out of boredom."
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i aLwaYS WoNDereD whAT wOulD HapPEN iF voLdY WoN okaaaayy well shit. i never imagined it that way sheesh. and apparently Voldy avada kedavra'd Harry 6 times, hung his body up the Astronomy Tower so the Order survivors can see his rotten corpse, all the surviving females are forced to be a part of this "breeding" programs as "surrogates" for the Death Eaters because most of the pureblood females are infertile or barren and they need to procreate more purebloods so...
... yeah. this book is d-a-r-k, DARK.
my girl Hermione was so broken in this part. she lost some of her memories from the war, she was sold to Draco, had depression, anxiety, agoraphobia, ptsd, and survivor's guilt. she's also raped by Draco for 6 months (5 times a month because of the breeding program) and is being tortured by Legilimency (where someone invades your memories and apparently it hurts like a bitch), almost raped by Graham Montague, and had her eye gouged out by Draco's wife, Astoria (don't worry, he and Astoria never did anything they hated each other).
yeah... our girl has been through a lot here. and Malfoy? hated him (calm down i only hated him in this part when i didn't know wtf was going on). i just wanted to-
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but also... not because High Reeve Draco is scary af.
listen. i knew something was up with him because we get glimpses of the real Draco. and his reaction when he needs to "breed"? yeah not a normal reaction. i can tell he was in pain and he was just holding it in. i knew something was up. and i was right!! when i found out what i found out- THE PAIN OH MY GOD.
anywho this part ends with Hermione getting pregnant and she gets into a coma and her memories start coming back.
･ﾟﾟ･｡｡･ﾟﾟ･PART II: DRAMIONE >>> THE ORDER･ﾟﾟ･｡｡･ﾟﾟ･．
➵ flashback; March 2002 - July 2003
ok ok. this is where shit really begins. so this is the part where EVERY. TEA. IS. SPILLED. we finally find out what the fuck happened and why she lost certain parts of her memories.
so we find out that Hermione is one of the main healers and dark curse specialist, so she's in charge of healing practically everybody. she's a "nOn ACtiVe MEmBer" of the Order who "doesn't fight" (lol). this begins with Kingsley and Moody secretly selling her to Draco because he offered to be their spy and he wanted her for some reason.
honestly this was my mood the whole time:
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everyone was my hurting my babies and that is unacceptable.
Harry, Ron, Dumbledore's Army and the rest of the Order GOT...more
does anyone else automatically picture henry cavill aka superman aka the witcher aka daddy whenever there's a CEO romance? because same. 3.25 stars ✩⋆
does anyone else automatically picture henry cavill aka superman aka the witcher aka daddy whenever there's a CEO romance? because same.
ok so first and foremost, um, this took me two weeks to finish...
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HA ha ha oops. but the tropes though...
↬ marriage of convenience and fake relationship ↬ H is the boss and h is his personal assisstant ↬ slowburn // and when i mean slowburn- i really do mean SLOW-fuckin'-BURN ↬ chaotic family AND ex drama, many people trying to break them up ↬ connecting over trauma ✨ ↬ cold grumpy H, sunshine h // this dude was cold af lemme tell you ↬ sexual tension (??)
so naturally, with all the tropes above ⤴ i gravitated towards this book like the typical slowburn, marriage of convenience ho that i am. and now you're probably asking, mel why did it take you two weeks to finish?? well y/n imma answer that later. sorry. BUT ANYWAYS-
『 p l o t 』↠ so this book is about Dane Davenport (H) asking Vienna (h) to be his fake wife for a year because he has to get married before the age of 38 to access his trust fund. so they get married, live together, people creating dramas and trying to break them up, both Dane and Vienna being stubborn af and not doing anything till like 60% of the book y'all know the drill.
// SPOILERS AHEAD //
･ﾟﾟ･｡｡･ﾟﾟ･ characters ･ﾟﾟ･｡｡･ﾟﾟ･
— Vienna (h)
"I'd tried to make use of every room in the oversized house-even the gym, though I had a genuine allergy to exercise."
first and foremost this girl is a bad bitch. i loved her. she didn't take ANY shit from anyone. when people were trying to sabotage her, being mean and calling her a gold digger, my girl was like
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love that energy. she calls people out and not sugar coat anything when people are being annoying. and i love that she grew to be this independent woman with a lot of backbone even when she had a traumatic past.
— Dane Davenport (H)
"Never think I'm a man who ever settles for anything less than exactly what he wants. I never have, I never will. I know how to get what I want, and I know how to keep it."
cold and ruthless? an asshole? 'baby girl' kink? yes, yes, and fuuuuck yes.
not gonna lie, i don't really know Dane that much and had a hard time connecting with him since there's barely interaction/dialogue with him with Vienna in the beginning (especially since this whole book is only in h's pov) but ummmmm once he pulled this move:
"That's it, baby girl, stay nice and quiet while I fuck you."
... **baby girl kink intensifies**
and suddenly forgot all my nonexistent feelings for Dane because once he called Vienna baby girl it was GAME OVER for me folks. i felt that ...more
single dad that works as a coast guard pilot? heroine who is a little bit messed up because of her past? these two being neighbors? cute lit3.75 stars
single dad that works as a coast guard pilot? heroine who is a little bit messed up because of her past? these two being neighbors? cute little daughter that loves to collect seashells and has 5 different pets? ex drama? the OUTER BANKS??
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ok so everything is just COMPLICATED.
↳ you have Morgan (h) moving to this huge ass house to rebuild it and "heal" herself after losing the man she loved 2 years ago because he was a pilot for the military and he sacrificed his life for her friends' husbands. for the past 2 years, she's had this thing called complicated grief and it got so bad that she had anxiety attacks, can't even open his truck, etc. AND THEN - get this - Jackson, the hot neighbor with the cute little kid that she is falling for is also a pilot soo uhh... yikes.
alright let's talk about the // CHARACTERS // — Morgan Bartley (h)
"God, I didn’t deserve this man who held me carefully as I cried out my grief for another."
so not gonna lie, i was a tiny bit- ok actually, VERY frustrated with Morgan from middle to end but imma talk about that later, however, i felt so bad for her! that scene when she finally confronted her friends about their neglect and lack of care when it came to her pain?? ugh MY HEART. i really liked her character development and growth tho. her grief was so bad and painful in the beginning but i like seeing her overcome that.
— Jackson Montgomery (H)
"I’ve waited my entire life to love you, Morgan. Everything that came before was just to prepare me for your arrival, to teach me how to love you."
this man CARRIED this book. all the swoony, lovey-dovey shit? yup, this man's got it. how do i describe this him... well, he's a simp, in a good way of course (not that there's a bad way??) but yeah, this dude was smitten, guys- he was smitten, enamored and BEWITCHED. it was so cute. and the fact that he fought for her the whole freaking time while knowing she still loves her dead quasi-ex??
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can someone get this man a trophy because damn. i don't know how he handled seeing the woman he loves grieve so hard for another man that she STILL loved at that point (not that the OM deserved it by the way... too harsh? oops).
and now let's get on with the // ROMANCE // like i said, not only did Jackson carry this book but he carried the whole damn romance. guys, this dude was so swoony and 100% all in when it came to Morgan!!
"I'm going to love you so well that you'll never doubt that I choose you. Every day. Every situation. I choose you."
y'all see THIS ⤴ y'all see THAT. yeah... What. A. Man. the patience of this man... i could NEVER. if my future lover is grieving and loving his dead quasi-ex... not gonna lie... i would dip. i'm sorry i know i'm a masochist but i'm not that much of a masochist. but Jackson tho... good for him. i love a Hero who fights for the heroine.
okaaay now let's talk about // EX DRAMA & MORGAN'S "FRIENDS" (spoilers) // you know when it comes to books that has ex-drama, i'm always worried that the heroine might be second best but nahhh. it's the other way around in this book.
✧history with OM
↳ Morgan has been in love with Will (OM) for 8-10 years but they were never together. her love was unrequited because he was in love with Peyton (her best friend's sister who died) and then dated Peyton's sister, Paisley. he ALWAYS chose someone else and never Morgan. but the day of his deployment, he promised they'll be together when he comes back but he died few days later.
you know... obviously i'm uncomfortable whenever she says she still loves Will because like, look:
"Every label I could put on what I had with Will felt too small, too pale in comparison to what we'd been, and what we could have evolved into, and yet too big for our lack of definition."
see? this all makes me ✨uncomfy✨ and i was a little frustrated with Morgan when she kept being stubborn about not loving Jackson, all the while thinking about how much she loved Will like dude. chill. please give my mans Jackson what he deserves, thank you.
but then i'm hit with these:
↳ "The man I loved with my whole heart gave his life so one of the women he loved could have her husband... I've spent the last two years wondering why I wasn't enough to make him want to live."
↳ "Just like Peyton hadn't chosen Will... and yet he'd still loved her until his dying breath. He'd loved Paisley, too, even when she'd chosen Jagger. But he'd never loved me, even though I was the only one who had ever chosen him."
and honestly? Will, does NOT deserve Morgan's at all. this dude made her wait for 8 YEARS while pining after someone else AND dating her best friend. so yeah, i'm mad at him and i feel so bad for Morgan! she wasn't even second, third or FOURTH best, she's literally all the way to the very bottom. i'm not gonna say i'm glad he's gone but...
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do i think that Morgan and Jackson wouldn't happen if Will is still alive? yeah. but do i think their love is stronger than Jackson and Morgan's? hell no.
and her friends suck especially Paisley (Will's ex). i'm not gonna get into it but... they suck. i knew they had their own grievances but neglecting her, not having her back when she had theirs, shoving their happily-ever-afters to her face when she didn't get hers, implicitly treating her like she doesn't deserve to grieve Will, not even checking on her if she was okay when the "love of her life" died, etc.
they suck but... that scene when she confronted them? it was kinda awesome. like, yesss bishh keep yelling at them woo!!
there is a little bit of OW drama where Claire, the baby mama shows up and causes trouble, wanting to reconcile but nothing to worry about because again, Jackson is 100% all about Morgan.
* * *
i just wish we saw more of Morgan admitting she loved Jackson because my girl really made the man work HARD. because you know what, at times, i feel like she didn't even deserve him but oh well. and i also wanted to see more scenes with Finley (Jackson's daughter) because fictional kids are *chef's kiss*
and can we talk about the climax where Morgan chose to save Finley instead of attending Will's medal of honor ceremony, while there was an upcoming hurricane with 14 ft waves?? because that shit was INTENSE.
anyways, speaking of OUTER BANKS, anyone else watch that netflix show? do y'all love JJ as much as I am? do you guys ship Kiera and JJ? anyone else think that... Rafe is... lowkey... hot?