A lot of the time skips didn't add up; the FMC really needed to develop a backbone. Every single time the MMC messed This read a lot like a YA novel.
A lot of the time skips didn't add up; the FMC really needed to develop a backbone. Every single time the MMC messed up, she took him back.
And no matter HOW many times her magic warned her that she was in danger, she never listened. She allowed herself to be used, manipulated and attacked.
I understand that the FMC describes her blood reacting in three ways: jolt, fizz and hum but those words were soooooo overused.
This could have been an intriguing story, but alas it missed. The world building wasn't there; character development wasn't there; plot development wasn't there. It was as if I was reading the same situations, words, thoughts and motives for the entire book. ...more
There's one MMC personality that I hate in RH books: "I don't want a mate/hate my mate/will reject my mate for [insert dumb reason here]." And tDNF 8%
There's one MMC personality that I hate in RH books: "I don't want a mate/hate my mate/will reject my mate for [insert dumb reason here]." And that is in this book. The wolf shifter is denying the FMC is his mate for an unknown reason (unknown to me because I only read 8% of the book). It's the whole of his personality. ...more
So far, the plot and action is good and I like the idea of a faerie princess hiding in the mortal realm. However, I dislike two major things. The firsSo far, the plot and action is good and I like the idea of a faerie princess hiding in the mortal realm. However, I dislike two major things. The first, Duncan. His WHOLE personality is "I hate Alisa." He's even been called out on it twice thus far (22% in) and he doesn't let up. His inner monologue, his words, and his inaction all showcase how much he hates the FMC and it's just tiring. Not even a quarter of the way through, and Duncan's personality is bothersome. The second major issue is the amount of BBS the FMC has when she is around everyone. Even Duncan, who hates her. The first couple chapters we think the FMC is a badass Hunter but the moment she gets around the fae men, all she can think about is them touching her, or how her nipples harden, or how her pussy gets wet. It's so disappointing that we're unable to have a woman fighter without her losing her train of thought around a pretty man.
30% in - Duncan still hasn't let up. It's exhausting. This whole character is making me regret even picking up the book.
35% - Alisa tells Azreal to stop talking/comparing who she is now with her past self. "Stop talking about who I was before." He agrees. No less than a page later, he won't stop talking about how she was before and she doesn't correct him. How did she become so weak? She caught onto the fact that these three men cannot be trusted, but less than 5% later, she allows them into her private rooms and wants to kiss one. PICK A LANE.
43% - Duncan still is an asshole, his personality isn't changing apparently. Alisa keeps asking questions, yet no one tells her anything and she gives up her suspicions when one of the three gets close to her. *rolls eyes* Apparently they are so pretty she forgets that they all tricked her.
45% - So her body remembers how to wield weapons, but not how to ride a horse?
57% - I've now started to skim every interaction with Duncan or a chapter from Duncan's POV; his negativity is just too much.
82% - We still have no idea why everyone hates her. There's no much advancement to the plot. And why is she so accepting of the fact that her brother dictates her travel plans? She finds out the real reason she was brought back to faerie, and she throws a tantrum by throwing books. In one breath she says that she hates Azreal, but kisses him and cuddles into his warmth the next second. PICK A LANE.
85% - Alisa says "It's not easy for me to relinquish control..." I call BS on that. She's never in control and accepts whatever someone tells her/shows her.
95% - Not only is the whole Duncan thing exhausting, so is the "banter" between Azreal and Alisa. That relationship is awful. She accepts the bare minimum in answers, forgets what she wants as soon as he is near and doesn't push back when people keep telling her "later."
Completed
Here is the most annoying thing ever. WE DON'T KNOW ANYTHING BECAUSE EVERYONE REFUSES TO TELL ALISA ANYTHING. It isn't until the 97% mark that we even know why Azreal hates Alisa. And it's just circumstantial evidence. The most intriguing storyline is the one with her brother. Why is the king the way he is? What changed him?
The world building is not very good. Fae normally can't lie, use steel/iron weapons and usually a couple other quirks. But not in this world. In this world it appears that the Fae are just humans with pointed ears and magic. I was very disappointed in the lack of effort made to explain the Fae.
FMC is supposed to have some gift with animals, yet she never uses it even though there are several animals all around. Blargh. ...more
There are A LOT of errors in this book; misspellings, syntax and sentence structure errors are all commonplace. Plus, tiktok verbiage has made its wayThere are A LOT of errors in this book; misspellings, syntax and sentence structure errors are all commonplace. Plus, tiktok verbiage has made its way into the story and that is very disappointing.
While Bailey isn't really known for groundbreaking stories, this book had more promise than her other stories. I just wish it wasn't mostly dialogue or filler information.
The best part of the book happened at the last 20%. ...more
15% in - MMC is a total asshole; admits that he is a total asshole; never apologizes. He grabs a woman so hard that he leaves red marks and bruises, a15% in - MMC is a total asshole; admits that he is a total asshole; never apologizes. He grabs a woman so hard that he leaves red marks and bruises, and doesnt apologize. And the woman? She's even worse. Says "it's fine." IN WHAT WORLD IS THAT FINE? And then she STILL lusts over him even though he has done nothing except be a total asshole towards him.
One of the top reviews was like "MMC isn't an ass." What book did that person read, cause it surely wasn't this one.
FMC even questions why she can't get your body to stop responding to Evan being an asshole. BBS. This book was written in 2023. Like, dude. Come on.
22% in - Evan assaults her (again), and instead of showing remorse, he's giddy that she put up a fight. He thinks its "cute" that she is so "fiesty."
DNF 24% - Once she gets turned on by being physically assaulted, sexually assaulted, and he refuses to apologize for being an asshole, I was done. ...more
There was a lot of stuff happening and the resolution was rushed, no answers given and no time really foThis is the authors debut novel and it shows.
There was a lot of stuff happening and the resolution was rushed, no answers given and no time really for the story to marinate when the big events happened.
Everything was treated with the same importance: walking down the street, walking into a room, meeting someone in a dark corner, eavesdropping on a meeting - EVERYTHING had such importance that it was difficult to ascertain what was really important.
Some events didn't make sense. Some leaps in logic didn't make sense.
The men were stupid: "You put a spell on me. I cant stop thinking about you. Stay away from me." Such immature personality traits.
We know who her fated mates are going to be, but we don't know their personalities.
Too much imagery, too much telling and not showing, and too much descriptives. The story didn't pick up until the 80% mark, before that it was dull and boring. ...more
Once I started skimming and not understanding the decisions being made AROUND the FMC, I DNF'd.
FMC is the poster child for body betrayal syndrDNF 65%
Once I started skimming and not understanding the decisions being made AROUND the FMC, I DNF'd.
FMC is the poster child for body betrayal syndrome.
Took a quick perusal of other reviews, and a reviewer mentioned that this book started off as a wattpadd creation, and everything made so much more sense.
Like so many shifter/PNR authors, this author chose to have very dumb nicknames for the FMC, even when they know she doesn't like the name, or the name is associated with bullying. I've started to realize that the less mature authors use nicknames as crutches and this book further solidifies that point. As with most KU authors, this author doesn't know how to format terms of endearment correctly. PSA to the author: terms of endearment are not capitalized unless their placement in a sentence warrants it. Correct: "Here, drink this sweetheart." Not correct: "Here, drink this Sweetheart."
FMC's name: Iliana Nicknames: doll, baby, babydoll, my Ili-girl, Ili, babe, honey, doll-baby, baby daisy, daisy, love, my gorgeous doll, Babydaisy, Lili, pup, pumpkin, sweetie, sweetheart, babylove, beautiful babydaisy, Lee (make that one make sense), My sweet pup, and Ili-doll. Between two MMC's, we get 18 nicknames, very few are formatted correctly.
The MC's are vile people, just trash. One MMC tries to forcibly mark the FMC and she forgives him after a day. Her "truemate" threatens to rape the FMC in front of her father and mark her because he has all the power. The truemate gets angry every time he is reminded he slept with FMC's sister. He feels like just because he apologized, that should be the end of it. And the one who tried to force a mate mark? Ended up doing it during her heat and can't figure out why she doesn't trust him.
FMC is the weakest person out there. She refuses to stand up for herself, she refuses to put up boundaries, and she refuses to hold the MC's accountable for their actions. She gets angry when people treat her like a child, but still acts like one. ...more
There aren't that many RH books that involve baseball, so I was excited to dip into this world. However, my excitement was very short lived.
ThDNF 26%
There aren't that many RH books that involve baseball, so I was excited to dip into this world. However, my excitement was very short lived.
The author has to be new to publishing/writing books because her writing is very stunted and juvenile which is demonstrated in the dialogue. Most of the dialogue prompts lack detail and finesse. We get a lot of "Abree says" "Maya muses" "D murmurs" and other one word descriptors. When I taught, that is how we helped 8th grade students apply descriptors to their text, knowing they would eventually get taught better ways to describe what a character is thinking/feeling. This author hasn't grown her "writing chops" since middle school.
The author also doesn't know what words/nouns should be capitalized, so she tries them all out, hoping one will stick. For example, the students have to take a self-defense class, so the author made sure to include all variations of the word: Self-defense, Self-Defense, and self-defense.
And like so many RH authors, this author chose to have very dumb nicknames for the FMC, even when they have known each other for only ten seconds. I've started to realize that the less mature authors use nicknames as crutches and this book further solidifies that point. As with most KU authors, this author doesn't know how to format terms of endearment correctly. PSA to the author: terms of endearment are not capitalized unless their placement in a sentence warrants it. Correct: "Here, drink this sweetheart." Not correct: "Here, drink this Sweetheart."
There are countless punctuation problems and capitalization issues.
When I decided to DNF the book, it was mostly dialogue and insipid dialogue at that. There were PAGES of "girl talk" that just didn't need to happen; paragraphs of "guy talk" that could have been summarized and what makes it worse is that we would have to read all of this banal dialogue but then read a recap of the conversation "the next day."
At only 26% in, these flaws manifested themselves so I decided to not continue with the book, no way was it getting better. ...more
Hale hasn't really changed her writing style or elevated her stories for a more mature audience, despite having an extensive catalog.
There are a lot Hale hasn't really changed her writing style or elevated her stories for a more mature audience, despite having an extensive catalog.
There are a lot of inconsistencies in this book, which a good content editor would have pointed out. FMC tells Puck not to touch her, he backs away. Next day, he touches her and she doesn't do anything. The day after that, he goes to touch her and says "I remember that not being touched is important to her" [paraphrasing] and pulls his hand away.
FMC begins the story by saying she is unable to get close to anyone and she can never tell anyone anything. By the end, she is telling anyone everything.
She refuses to take OTC meds from one MMC, but allows him to know where she lives. The next day, she allows a different MMC to give her OTC meds and a concoction of unknown origins.
Ender was the most annoying MMC tropes out there, and his kind appears in almost all of Hale's writing. He hates the FMC [insert dumb reason here] and she rarely pushes back against his verbal abuse.
There was also a lot of repetition in events. People had their nose broken several times, 'cause ya know, violence solves everything. FMC hits her head and "everything fades to black" about the same amount of times as we see a broken nose.
At this point, Hale has run out of ideas and her stories aren't original nor are her cliffhangers.
Dumb nicknames in this book: little flower little warrior birdie my love ...more
Man, I have NO IDEA why I thought reading book 2 would be any better than book 1, but it wasn't: it was worse. Again, not much in plot development hapMan, I have NO IDEA why I thought reading book 2 would be any better than book 1, but it wasn't: it was worse. Again, not much in plot development happened until the last 30%. I just can't continue on. What a cool idea made so bad by poor execution, a weak FMC, bland MMC's and stunted writing.
Everyone in the story acts like they are 12-15, not in their earlier 20's.
Also, in addition to the author copying some of the broader elements of the Harry Potter series in book one, we get another addition to "didn't i read this in HP?" There's a room with keys that all float around and they need to find the right key. *rolls eyes*
As for the people in this book? The one MMC rapes her in the bathroom. She keeps saying no, but he doesn't care. Another MMC also refuses to respect her boundaries, and touches her anytime he wants and refuses to allow her personal space. The other MMC keeps having sex with her, while telling her he hates her and then when someone asks if she is sad about it, she says "maybe." All of the MMC's say that she is resilient, strong and feisty. What girl are they fucking? Because it's not the FMC. She is the most weak willed, weak in personality and weak in character that I have ever seen.
Author needs a new set of editors because these ones are failing her hard. There was no direction to this book, comma splices were out of control, nicknames are still being formatted incorrectly and there's some general formatting errors that should not be in this book. The author has a large enough catalog that readers shouldn't be subjected to half-assed editing.
Frequency in word repetition: Midnight: 15 Little: 140 Gape: 40 Murmur: 54 Mutter: 58 Silver: 70 Grumble: 40...more
I really liked this book, but one star has been deducted from the rating due to the amount of formatting errors, plus the sheer amount of spelling, grI really liked this book, but one star has been deducted from the rating due to the amount of formatting errors, plus the sheer amount of spelling, grammar and punctuation errors.
This book has a bit of suspense, mystery and plot that revolves around the MC's but also separate from the main couple as well.
For once, the MMC wasn't a manwhore and that was a really nice change of pace. ...more
Even though this is a a M/F book, Asher decided to keep with the tradition of "every man gives the FMC a really dumb nickname." Here are the FMC's nickEven though this is a a M/F book, Asher decided to keep with the tradition of "every man gives the FMC a really dumb nickname." Here are the FMC's nicknames: Frills, Syphon, Claws, Ducky, Biscuit, Beautiful.
She allows herself to be manhandled ALL THE TIME. At 21%, the MMC threatens the FMC with sexual punishment because she dare have a personality. Also at 21%, we have BBS. At 26%, the FMC acknowledges that she is developing feelings for two dragons, and says "I need to stop doing that." AND SHE NEVER STOPS. In fact, we hear about how she needs to stop getting close to the people in the city and stop being complacent almost every chapter. At 30%, she breaks what she promised herself at 26%. But then the very next paragraph, she says she won't spill any of her secrets. WHICH SHE DOES TIME AND TIME AGAIN.
FMC is so very weak minded, and the author chose to hide BBS and being weak behind a fated mate bond.
The one thing that Asher excels at is creating a world, magic system and people that are so very real. It's one of her biggest strengths.
I will read book 2, but man, did I expect better of Asher. It's 2025, we can have our FMC's stick up for themselves and not succumb to BBS. I think it's time. ...more