Thomas's Reviews > Far from the Tree: Parents, Children, and the Search for Identity

An amazing book about the love it takes to raise extraordinary children. Andrew Solomon's 700-page powerhouse Far from the Tree explores the families of kids with stigmatized conditions: kids born deaf, with autism, or as prodigies; kids who are the progeny of rape, who commit crimes, who are disabled; kids who have disabilities, dwarfism, and Down syndrome. He delves into the intricacies of each of these issues, including several case studies that he collected after ten years of interviews with more than 300 families. Solomon displays remarkable research skill in this book, as well as a stunning compassion and care for the diverse humans he writes about.

I appreciate this book so much because it focuses on love instead of hate. Yes, hatred for these kids is well and alive - people scorn boys who want to be girls, teens who've committed crimes, and disabled children who are already so often mocked and denigrated. But through listening to the families of these children, sharing these stories, and synthesizing research about their unique situations, Solomon builds a deep reservoir of empathy, an empathy that is more necessary than ever when our world is so filled with anger and misunderstanding (I'm looking at you, President Elect Trump.) He discusses how transgender children have to fight against outdated gender norms to live as their true selves, how kids who have committed crimes have suffered unspeakable abuse and need more therapy than punishment, how disabled children often exhibit a special, bittersweet resilience, and more. Humans often turn their fear of the unknown into hate. I hope that through reading this book, we can all come to understand those who are different than us, so we can spread a message of unity and kindness, instead of division and hate.

Overall, recommended to anyone who wants to read about extraordinary families, psychology and sociology, and humans who are often ostracized, even when they deserve love as much as any of us do. While Far from the Tree is lengthy and sometimes reads like Solomon just lists one case study after another, it is a manageable read if you give yourself space to digest it. As a gay Asian man who has faced my own trials and tribulations, I have so much respect for Solomon and how he transforms his suffering into such beautiful, intelligent writing. Looking forward to reading more of his work in the future.