The Avengers

It’s week six of the Marvel-A-Week challenge and the end of Phase One of the Marvel franchise.  It was finally time to watch The Avengers.

The past six weeks has reminded me just how much I enjoy the Marvel films and how invested in the characters I have become over the years.  However, as the weeks trundle on, it has also made me realise that the Marvel movies are not watched regularly, and in some cases, at all.  It’s an odd situation.

It certainly wasn’t a chore to sit down and watch The Avengers.  I was rather looking forward to it.

PLOT:  Loki (Tom Hiddleston) fell off the Bifrost and landed on earth looking like a drugged-up vampire, brandishing a magical sceptre.  There are hints of a traumatic backstory but why waste time on a popular character’s development.  Loki is here to rule.  Nick Fury (Samuel L Jackson) invites Tony Stark (Robert Downey Junior), Captain America (Chris Evans), Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson) and Bruce Banner (Mark Ruffalo) to form a super group in order to bring Loki down.  Thor (Chris Hemsworth) rocks up without prior invitation and joins the team.  The Avengers Assemble.  The robots are defeated.  Mankind googles shawarma.  END PLOT

The plot is grand.  The world’s mightiest heroes fail to gel until they are given something to avenge and defeat Loki.  This is fine.  The Tesseract pops up once more as a glowing blue McGuffin, and, in the interest of full and frank disclosure, I still have no fucking idea why it’s so important.  The Infinity Stones are mentioned quite a bit in Phases Two and Three, and what with Thanos on route to earth, I have decided that I am going to use the Marvel-A-Week challenge to educate myself on an incredibly important issue that has passed me by to such an extent that my ignorance is actually quite impressive.

There is plenty of action.  The three-way battle between Captain America, Iron Man and Thor is a neat little dick measuring exercise which concludes in a three-way draw. The main action is the big battle for New York in which many Chitauri and buildings are destroyed.  The battle isn’t that exciting, like everything in the Avengers, what saves it, is the characters.

The trailer for the Avengers still gives me goose-bumps and when the characters are on screen together you can’t help but get excited.  The various personalities clash, but come together in battle with choreography that would make the Strictly Come Dancing judges weep with pride.  I will never tire of watching Hawkeye narrate stuff, Hulk smash and Thor and Captain America double team.  I take credit for their achievements as though I am one of the team.

The cast are on top form and your opinion on the division of screen time will depend on which character your true allegiance lies with.  I lean towards Asgard so the Thor and Loki scenes were the moments that stood out for me.  It may be 2018, but Hulk punching Thor still gets the biggest and most genuine laugh in the entire film.  Chris Hemsworth is grand, although Thor is a million miles away from his Ragnarok personality, and so is the rest of the cast, but it’s once again Tom Hiddleston who steals the show.

I agree with the late Agent Coulson (I do not acknowledge the existence of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D) that Loki lacked conviction about his master plan.  I agree with Tony Stark when he said that Loki couldn’t win.  I agree with all the Tumblr theories that suggest Loki wasn’t in complete control of his own mind and only had brief moments of lucidity.  This has to be the case, otherwise, like in Thor, Loki is just bumbling around from one scene to another, making up his plan depending on how various conversations play out.  They usually end negatively.  Loki is like the Anti-Gump with the endurance of Wile-E-Coyote.  I still love him and I’m rolling down the road to Infinity War believing that Loki will be the hero of day.  #TeamLoki. 

Drugged-Up-Vampire-Loki (sceptre not pictured)

Robert Downey Junior, Chris Evans and the rest of the cast are fine.  Mark Ruffalo appears as the newly improved Banner and fits right in.  After sitting through The Incredible Hulk during Week Two I was very pleased to see him. The cast cannot be faulted and I am appreciating their efforts more now than I did at the time. 

The Avengers probably isn’t a perfect film, but I don’t care.  If you came here for objectivity, and made it to the last paragraph, you really should not be surprised when I give it 10/10.  After five films, The Avengers united a team of superheroes in a thoroughly entertaining manner.  It’s an achievement and one I will give Marvel full credit for right up until I sue them for bladder damage.

Next week it’s Iron Man 3.  I suspect I’ll come crashing down to earth. 

Captain America: The First Avenger

Captain America: The First Avenger is the fifth instalment of the Marvel-A-Week challenge and the last solo film before The Avengers.

 

My enduring love of Chris Evans means that my excitement levels for Captain America: The First Avenger, way back in 2011, would have been at an all-time high.  My love of Chris Evans still burns bright, but my memories of The First Avenger have long faded, and it was with resignation rather than excitement that I sat down to watch it.   

PLOT:  Steve Rogers is a tiny little dude (played by the not so tiny Chris Evans) who has a myriad of health problems which renders him ineligible to enlist in the US army and fight with the allies in Nazi Germany.   Rogers’ heroic, but suicidal, attitude to teamwork catches the eye Dr Erskine (Stanley Tucci) who offers Steve the chance to be turned into a super soldier.  Thankfully for us all, it works and Steve and his washboard abs head off to defeat Johann Schmidt (Hugo Weaving), a Nazi scientist who has somehow discovered that the Tesseract, a magical blue cube, is being hidden on earth.  Schmidt wants to use its  people vaporising powers to create weapons, win the war and conquer earth.  Hail Hydra.  END PLOT

Captain America: The First Avenger works as an origin story as by the end of the film we know exactly who Steve Rogers is and where he came from.  This is all fine in theory and it holds up on its own merits as an reasonably enjoyable summer film, but, everything about The First Avenger flows like a really long prelude to further Marvel films and revelations.  The First Avenger sets up Steve Rogers in the modern day for The Avengers, it sets up Bucky’s (spoiler alert) return as The Winter Soldier and, if my Timeline of the Tesseract is correct (it probably isn't), it also reveals that at some point, Odin lost the glowing blue cube on earth and then, in true Odin style, decided to ignore the problem in the hope that it would simply go away.  Seriously, if Odin wasn’t such a complete fuck up, the road to Infinity War would be very different. I digress. #teamloki

There is a gaggle of fair haired thirty-somethings in Hollywood cursing Chris Evans’ name for accepting the role of Captain America.  The CGI rendering of Wee Steve is as horrific as I remembered and I still believe that Steve’s shrunken head changes size in every scene.  The effects didn’t look great in 2011 and they did not stand the test of time.  Thankfully, Steve levels up so that we can all enjoy and appreciate Captain America in his true form.  Evans is grand as Steve Rogers and his awkward stiffness becomes a welcome contrast to the larger than life personalities that inhabit the nine realms. 

I paid much more attention to Sebastian Stan’s Bucky this time around given that I know how interesting his character becomes in The Winter Soldier.  Stan is fine in the dutiful best friend role that never gets fleshed out beyond that. Hayley Atwell as Peggy Carter is excellent and is sadly left behind in the 1940’s.  Evans and Atwell worked well together, and, the final line of the movie – ‘I had a date’ – was a touching end to a relationship that ended before it ever got started.   

Stanley Tucci will always be welcome when he pops up in any film and even though Tommy Lee Jones scowls around like a grumpy old grandpa whose prune juice hasn’t kicked in he is actually great fun as Colonel Philips. 

I know nothing about the Captain America comics, but I sense that (the?) Red Skull is a greater adversary for Captain America than the film makes him out to be.  Hugo Weaving tries to bring some acting gravitas to the film and, while it definitely would not have felt out of place in Thor, it just didn’t work in The First Avenger.  Red Skull used the Tesseract to create a few zappy sticks before he himself became zapped by the Tesseract.  He was quite the criminal mastermind.

My biggest problem with Captain America: The First Avenger is that it looked cheap.  I don’t know if it was filmed for 3D or just made on a relatively low budget, but the CGI backgrounds were awful and even scenes set in a relatively sparse forest or rubble filled bar looked badly cobbled together.  When compared to Iron Man and Thor, the effects in The First Avenger were flat.

I am enjoying the Marvel-A-Week challenge, but I am not going to lie, I was relieved when the closing credits rolled.  The running time was too long for a film in which very little seemed to happen.  I would have accepted Captain America being thawed out and introduced in The Avengers as easily as the Avengers themselves accepted Thor randomly rocking up from space and becoming one of the gang.  If Captain America: The First Avenger didn’t exist the Marvel universe wouldn’t suffer.  It gets 5/10.  The weakest offering so far, which is sad as Steve Rogers is such a strong and likeable character.

Ant-Man

 

The Marvel Money Train rumbles on and I’m not ashamed to admit that I have bought my first class ticket.  I'm enjoying the ride and although some films are bumpier than others I am with it until the bitter end or my metaphor completely derails.  Before Thor came out I couldn’t get my head around how the character would fit into the Marvel Universe and then it turned out to be one of my favourite films so regardless of how strange a concept is I will always give Marvel the benefit of the doubt. 

My problem with Ant-Man was never the concept.  It was always the casting.  A poor and over played trailer didn’t do anything to increase my enthusiasm. 

PLOT:  Scott Lang (Paul Rudd) has just been released from prison and is recruited by Hank Pym (Michael Douglas) to break into a building and steal the same shrinking technology because, erm, no one likes competition.  Scott Lang dons the Ant-Man suit and becomes the hero he was born to be.  END PLOT

The first Ant-Man film was always going to be an origin story and although nearly all the major players in The Avengers got one the concept is beginning to feel overdone.  The main plotline is nothing more than an elaborate heist to stop Cross (Corey Stall) from selling his legally manufactured weapon for profit in what is now a morally dubious action despite it being hero Tony Stark’s key source of income.  I think that Hank Pym secretly hates bald people.  The heist involved a band of crooks with the most memorable being Michael Pena who gave the film its biggest laughs.  Unfortunately, the overall criminal prowess of Lang’s gang was harder to buy into than the idea of a fully functioning ant army.

The effects were excellent and I thoroughly enjoyed the ant sized action sequences which were all great fun to watch.  There was plenty of humour scattered throughout the action and training montages but I found myself playing “Spot the Edgar Wright” sections of the script.  The family drama felt unnecessary although Hollywood’s resident wife and mother, Judy Greer is always a welcome addition to any film.

As mentioned above my main concern was the casting of Paul Rudd.  Rudd is the actor you cast as the lead man’s best friend who offers witty and slightly drunken advice in a bar and is at his best in very small doses.  The first time I saw the trailer I immediately thought that Joel McHale would have been better in the role and I carried this thought with me for months as my dislike of Rudd’s casting and the trailer grew.  The dry humour and sarcastic tone would have suited McHale perfectly but I did warm to Rudd in the role although I do not believe for one second that the dude is capable of jumping a garden fence unaided let alone scale a wall.  Rudd was passable and by the time the closing credits rolled around I had gotten over my irrational gripe.

Evangeline Lilly’s Hope van Dyne was a vital cog in Cross and Pyms’ plans despite doing nothing more strenuous than cross her arms and stare witheringly into space. 

Don't worry Evangeline................

 

The passing reference to her love of karate and then have her suddenly kick ass just made the whole independent woman vibe feel clichéd.  The closing credits scene didn’t surprise me at all but I am curious to see how that storyline develops. 

It'll soon be over............

Michael Douglas brought some sass to Hank Pym and played the cranky mentor very well; his discrimination against bald people aside.

The weakest link in the cast is Corey Stall.  Stall overacts like crazy and is saddled with a wafer-thin villain whose only crime is being a reasonably intelligent yet slightly dickish scientist.  In an attempt to make Cross a true villain he literally sends some lambs to the slaughter and grins manically from time to time.  This is his only character development.  It was a poor offering which was a million miles away from the charismatic Loki or the emotionally conflicted Winter Soldier. 

Thankfully Ant-Man was much better than expected and was a solid, if generic, introduction to a new Marvel character.  I am not against seeing more of Ant-Man in future films.  The references to The Avengers characters scattered throughout the film were appreciated and we got an idea of where Ant-Man is going to slot in to the upcoming Civil War arc.  Overall Ant-Man was a decent summer film and gets 7/10 and the second post credit sequence was Marvel’s best to date.  

Oops, you've just seen the post credits sequence haven't you?

Avengers: Age of Ultron

I think it’s a testament to my ability to avoid TV spots and trailers that one of the most anticipated films of the year managed to sneak up on me.  My desire to avoid all spoilers was greater than my desire to see the film causing me to essentially forget about its impending arrival.  I am not fooling anyone with my nonchalant attitude as once the tickets were booked I was as excited as the rest of the world.

I don’t read reviews until after I have seen the film in question and I am assuming that any poor sod that happens to stumble across this review has adopted the same thought process therefore there will be mild spoilers scattered here and there.  This is your one and only warning.

PLOT:  After retrieving Loki’s Sceptre from HYDRA Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jnr) and Bruce Banner (Mark Ruffalo) discover that it contains artificial intelligence.  Unfortunately their attempts to create a global defence programme goes awry and they lose control of their creation. The Avengers assemble to save the planet from falling into the Age of Ultron (clunky but meh, I’m not deleting it).  END PLOT.

I am an easy mark when it comes to science in films.  I swear to the gods that the dinosaur reincarnation logic makes more sense every time I watch Jurassic Park.  If science and artificial intelligence in a film is sold to me with any degree of confidence I can generally buy into it.  I accepted the discovery that Loki’s snazzy stick had the ability to create free thinking life and distribute visually cool super powers despite being used primarily as a hypnotic mind control device with relative ease. 

The plot of Age of Ultron splits into three acts namely Retrieve the Sceptre, The Sceptre is Lost: Where’s Thor? and Stop Bickering and Assemble Already.  The script flows fairly well and despite the introduction of unnecessary characters for the hell of it (Andy Serkis I am looking directly at you) it never breaks stride and the 2hour 20min running time flies by.

The action was always visually spectacular save for the jumping in unison shot which was cheesy and didn’t have the same impact as the goosebump raising Assemble shot from the last film.  The big set pieces involved lengthy battles against generic soldiers or generic robots and although it had the danger of becoming one big CGI mess the various double-team manoeuvres, which were always a pleasure to watch, helped keep me interested.  I saw the film in 2D so perhaps the action sequences needed to be viewed in 3D to be fully appreciated.  I am unlikely to test this theory.

Despite the noise and action the Avengers are always at their best in the quieter moments.  Whether they are bickering or having a beer/banter moment the film always comes to life when the cast are together.  I will always maintain that less Robert Downey Jnr is more but you can’t fault the actors for their performances.  Everyone gets their chance to shine but it was almost jarring that Hawkeye went from being shafted in previous Marvel Movies to being the character with the most complete backstory.  The Avengers and the audience were united in bafflement.  I am not complaining though as I am a huge Jeremy Renner fan.

 

Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Elizabeth Olsen were great additions to the cast although Quicksilver was always going to feel a bit disappointing after Days of Future Past got the character first.  Despite only his voice appearing on screen James Spader was excellent.  Spader’s voice is calm, terrifying and hilarious all at once – Ultron can very much be considered a job well done.

Avengers: Age of Ultron was the perfect way to kick off Summer Season in the cinema.  It isn’t quite a perfect film but I don’t think I will ever tire of seeing this particular bunch of heroes save the world.  Age of Ultron gets 9/10.  As for the post credit sequence, if you are coming just get on with it already!

Losers. Assemble.

The Losers:  The Ultimate Review.

Every once in a while a group of people, several countries apart, will all band together in online conversation and debate.  The topic of choice today is the 2010 film The Losers.  I want you all to sit back, strap in and prepare yourself for not just one but FOUR reviews of a film you had probably forgotten about long, long ago. 

 

Opening the show we have the lovely Cindy Prascik.  Cindy and I have been discussing movies since Myspace (google it children).  The debate does branch out from film and there has been many a philosophical discussion about the attractiveness of the male and various female forms. 

 

Cindy Prascik:

"Dearest Blog, with this entry I shall claim membership in one of the world's most exclusive clubs: People Who Love the Losers.

 

Spoiler level here will be off the charts, because you've had four years to catch up with this. If you haven’t seen it yet, read no more until you have! (But, seriously, what are you waiting for??)

 

After being framed for mass murder in Bolivia, an elite Special Forces team hooks up with a seductive con artist to clear their names and get back home to the U.S.

 

Dear reader(s), you know me well, do you not? I like testosterone-fueled action flicks. Bonus points if they're based on comic books. Double bonus points if they make me laugh, too. The Losers ticks all the boxes for me.

 

Let's start with this gifted and gorgeous cast, shall we? The leader of our merry band of misfits is Clay (Jeffrey Dean Morgan). Haunted by betrayal and the resulting loss of young life, he is single-mindedly bent on revenge against Max, the mysterious man who set up his team. Roque (the dashing Idris Elba) is a headstrong demolitions expert who often questions Clay's leadership. Communications specialist Jensen (Chris Evans) and transportation coordinator Pooch (Columbus Short) trade insults and provide the movie's best comic relief. Finally, there's Cougar (Ơscar Jaenada), a sniper whose silent charm nearly steals the whole show. Aisha (the glorious and perfect Zoe Saldana) is a local woman who offers her assistance to the team...but with her own agenda, of course. The cast is rounded out by an amusingly deadpan Jason Patrick as Max, and Holt McCallany as Max' clueless right-hand man, Wade.

 

The Losers features non-stop action from the outset. There's a fair bit of carnage, but the tone is mostly light...quite an achievement considering the movie opens with 25 kids getting blown up. An early hotel-room fight between Morgan and Saldana is hotter than most sex scenes. There's a nice comic feel to the film, with beginning and ending credits done in comic book-style art, and changes of venue announced in big, sweeping lettering. The movie keeps viewers on the edge of their seats with plenty of twists, turns, and double-crosses, and, at a quick 97 minutes, it's smart enough not to wear out its welcome. Three specifics I feel are noteworthy in the annals of movie history: Wade's spectacular death by airplane engine, Zoe Saldana wielding a bazooka (*swoon*), and Chris Evans showboating his way through an a capella version of Journey's Don't Stop Believin'. Finally, The Losers reiterates the age-old movie message that nothing--and I mean NOTHING--good ever happens around those dockside container yards.

 

The Losers clocks in at 97 minutes, and is rated PG13 for "sequences of intense action and violence, a scene of sensuality, and language."

 

I took a peek at my original Losers review after writing this one. While I hadn't yet adopted the Weasley rating system at that time, I hit pretty much all the same notes as this one, minus the spoilers. In 2014, of a possible nine Weasleys, I'm pleased to give The Losers eight. It's a wild ride with an eminently likable cast and plenty of laughs along the way, and I remain so, so sorry there isn't a Losers 2 on the horizon.

Until next time...GO PETUNIAS!

Ready for Black Friday at Wal-Mart!!

Next up we have our resident Random Mexican Daniel Hernandez.  Daniel is another Myspace alum and together with Cindy we safely made the pilgrimage onto facebook .  As a general rule our cinema rotation is similar so whenever our opinions on a film are at opposite ends of the scale it always makes me doubt what I have written in my own review.

 

Daniel Hernandez:

"My original review of The Losers gave it a B- which should probably have been closer to a C or C+.  I honestly can’t contest any of the myriad of issues the film, Jason Patric, has or it’s unfortunate release date that placed it near a better film with roughly the same concept.  Still, there’s something about this silly movie that makes it utterly watchable.  Easiest answer is the cast.  Jeffery Dean Morgan and Zoe Saldana have some great chemistry together each bringing the right amount of cool to the characters.  I’m still a tad bit perplexed that Jeffery Dean Morgan isn’t more of a star, he’s got a gruff kind of charm to him that translates well on screen.  Saldana meanwhile seems to have just resigned herself to working behind makeup or via motion capture.  Personally I think with the right material she could be an incredible action star which is kind of impressive since she probably weighs about 90 pounds soaking wet.  Chris Evans may not be believable as a computer hacker but the guy has always had some great comedic timing.  I always kind of thought Evans was destined for superstardom ever since Not Another Teen Movie so it’s fun to look back before he hit it big with the Captain America role.  Round out the cast with Idris Elba, who probably should have been the actual villain instead of Patrick, and you have a film filled with lots of solid actors making a subpar film watchable in spite of itself. 

C+" 

 

It is now Maynard's time to shine.  Despite being a post-Myspace friend Maynard has become my go to horror movie guy and is a deservedly prolific blogger.  He does slum it from time to time and takes one for the team as we are about to find out with his less than positive review of our subject film.

 

Maynard:

"At minute 36, this is what two of the main characters say to each other:
"This is a classic." - "Yeah, this is a classic piece of shit."
Okay, they're actually talking about a car, and no, I don't think that "The Losers" is a classic piece of shit, but... *sigh* IMHO it's definitely a classic piece of lame, lousy, loserish cookie-cutter action rubbish.

Based on the DC comic book series of the same name (that I obviously have never heard of before), "The Losers" follows a group of black-ops mercenaries who plan their revenge on their former employers who betrayed them and set them up for death. Sounds like a lot like "The A-Team", huh? Well, actually it's more like "Ronin" meets "The Expendables", and of course, the original 1970s "Losers" comics were created long before the "A-Team" TV series.

Nevertheless, the box office failure of "The Losers" (Ha Ha!) can definitely be blamed on a) Joe Carnahan's 2010 feature adaptation of "The A-Team" which was released shortly after, as well as to b) the still-massive popularity of the "A-Team" brand. Even though it performed below expectations, "The A-Team" (which was released in June 2010) earned about 180 millions world wide (Domestic: 77 millions), while "The Losers" earned only about 29 millions worldwide (Domestic: 23 millions).

I unexpectedly enjoyed the hell out of "The A-Team" and I consider it one of the better action-related films of the last few years - but "The Losers" annoyed the crap outta me. My goodness, now this was really poor. I already gave up after the opening: oh-so-tough-and-cool guys playing silly card games and dropping mom jokes, Ram Jam's "Black Betty" (what an original song choice... yawn), a helicopter full of kids explodes (I don't like kids), a burning Teddy bear (boo hoo), cock-fighting etc. Director Sylvain White ("I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer") just can't decide between fun popcorn movie, grim revenge thriller, over-the-top comic-book insanity or action-drama . Tone and script are all over the place. The characters aren't likable at all...

...and that's just the first 15 minutes.

I have no idea how I made it through the goddamn rest. No idea how I survived Jason Patric ("The Lost Boys") as one of the worst and most unbearable movie villains in history, or Chris Evans ("Captain America") as unbelievably unfunny prankster, saying lines like "These Hot Dogs are delicious!" in a way as if he has never eaten a Hot Dog before. There's tiring amounts of oh-so-cool slow-motion sequences, oh-so-comic-book-like overlaid text and other annoying, unnecessary gimmicks that seem to be in the film only to distract the viewer, so that he doesn't realize how stupid the whole thing it is. There's also hardly any tension, hardly any atmosphere, way too many super-dull dialogue scenes, some really bad choices of music (I fucking hate Journey), the action scenes are rather uninspired and the screenplay is a fucking mess. There is no flow, no coherence. Just a succession of scenes strung together in a... let's say, quite haphazard manner.

Hottie Zoë Saldana and the cool-as-always Idris Elba deliver solid performances, same for Jeffrey Dean Morgan, though I think he's miscast and not exactly the best choice for this role. A few of the more action-packed scenes were quite enjoyable (like the one with the helicopter or the rather diverting finale) and although I hated Jason Patric's character, I chuckled at him saying "It's like giving a handgun to a six-year-old - you don't know how it's gonna end, but you're pretty sure it's gonna make the papers."

Yet, overall, this was sooo not my cup of tea. "The Losers" lost me early on and I spent the majority of its run time in a state of annoyment."

On another day I would be tempted to say that Maynard doth protest too much but alas I do appreciate where he is coming from.  This is one of those ridiculous situations were I agree with Maynard but then go on ahead and pretend otherwise.  If you have lasted this long then well done you.  Last and most certainly least are my own musings on The Losers:

 

Me:

"The Losers appeared on our screens in the summer of 2010 and although it did not set the Box Office on fire it has been regular in my 90min DVD rotation.  This is probably a backhanded comment when you learn what else is in the rotation.

I have been called out as a lazy blogger in the past and it is a fair statement.  The depth of my laziness runs much deeper than that as I am also a ridiculously lazy film viewer too. This is why a film like The Losers gets so much attention from me.

PLOT:  After a helicopter full of children are killed during a covert mission in Bolivia “The Losers” led by Jeffrey Dean Morgan’s Clay try to find the Max, (Jason Patric) the man who is responsible for their deaths.  Their mission is funded by the mysterious Aisha (Zoe Saldana) who also wants to kill Max.  The group tracks Max down in LA as he is about to buy four snukes from a group of terrorists.  END PLOT

The Losers is based on a set of graphic novels written by Andy Diggle which I read prior to seeing the film.  The novels are thoroughly entertaining and should have easily made the jump from book to screen especially when Peter Berg, a favourite of mine, is involved.  Alas, something didn’t quite work out. 

The original novels were for adults.  There was bad language, blood, humour, death and sex.  The films were watered down to a 12A and lost most of the key ingredients which would have set it apart from The A Team which was also released that summer.  The 12A rating does the film no favours and the attempts to make the characters rating friendly make them almost unrecognisable – there is a throwaway line about Aisha’s childhood ear collection but this ear collection is actually a big part of Aisha’s dangerous and let’s face it, slightly deranged, character.

All of the characters are underdeveloped but do tick off the list of stereotypes required to make an ensemble action flick – we have the leader (Jeffrey Dean Morgan), the love interest (Zoe Saldana), the computer geek (Chris Evans), the driver/MacGyver (Columbus Short), the silent sniper (Oscar Jaenada) and the betrayer (Idris Elba).  The characters may be weak but the cast do have chemistry which helps to cover over the flaws. 

Any film with Chris Evans will draw me in but in 2010 there was interest in Jeffrey Dean Morgan who was still on a high after his brilliant performance as The Comedian in Watchmen and we must not forget his tenure as “parent of the year” John Winchester.  It has not gone unnoticed that Morgan’s career has stalled and some of the supporting cast have gone on to become major A-List success. 

Unfortunately one thing the chemistry of the cast could not hide was the awful Max (Jason Patric).  Max’s danger came from his calculating intelligence but Jason Patric overacted like crazy and turned Max into a cartoon character.  Patric appeared to be aiming for confident business villain but it was all a bit handbags at dawn.

Max’s evil deeds include shooting an umbrella lady in the head and laughing at a really short man but his main plot thread involves buying four snukes from terrorists for a shitload of money and a Ducati.  I could be staring down the barrel of a snuke or “giant vibrating Easter Egg from hell” and I still couldn’t take my impending death seriously.  On paper snukes may seem more original than nuclear or chemical weapons but on the big screen it simply doesn’t work.  It doesn’t help that “Four Snukes and a Ducati” sounds more threatening as the latest hipster band than the terms of an illegal arms deal.

The action is standard fare but appropriate for the rating.  Instead of seeing the burning bodies of twenty kidnapped children we see a singed bear.  This pretty much sums up the film.  It was a wasted opportunity. 

I know The Losers is an average film, and worse than that, it is a poor adaptation of a legitimately good set of graphic novels.  There will be those who see the film as a mess that more often than not misses the mark and I won’t be able to launch into a staunch defence of The Losers as I agree with them.  On its own merits The Losers gets 5/10.

BUT

As mentioned above I can be a very lazy film viewer especially when it comes to choosing a DVD.  I don’t apologise for picking generic 90min films when I have had a hard day.  We all do it.  The Losers fits that bill perfectly which is why I thank it for being familiar, comforting and for not requiring too much attention or effort.  On the basis of me having a bad Tuesday The Losers gets 8/10."

To sum up; The Losers can either be loved, hated or viewed with a sense of nostalgia for a cast that have gone on to experience huge levels of success (unless your name is Jeffrey Dean Morgan).  It can also be viewed by a permanently single female who is likely to be rapped up in a blanket gnawing away at a bar of chocolate the size of a brick. 
 

We are the Four Horsemen of Occasional Collaboration.......Until next time..............

 

 

The Most Memorable Films of 2012

It is January which means that the blogging world compiles their best/worst lists.  Due to nothing other than laziness my list is based on the most memorable films I have viewed over the past year. 

It digs me out of a rather large hole for two reasons:
1: I am not compelled to compile a best and worst list as memorable covers everything
2: I am not limited to films released in 2012 or viewed in the cinema

As I tend to make the rules up as I go along this suits me perfectly.

 

10 – The Artist - January

http://karina-mundanerambling.blogspot.co.uk/2012/01/artist.html

The Artist almost begrudgingly takes a spot on my list of memorable films of 2012.  The silent film deserved all the praise it received for daring to try something different. 

 

I enjoyed The Artist in the cinema but the soundtrack gets more love than the film does.  It was a great achievement but I am relieved that it didn’t start a craze of silent black and white films.

 

9 – John Carter - March

http://karina-mundanerambling.blogspot.co.uk/2012/03/john-carter.html

I feel like I am in the minority with John Carter but I don’t particularly care as I enjoyed it – granted the film is flawed, probably too long and Carters only mode of transportation across Mars is to get kidnapped but there is something about the adventure that entertains me.  It is a bizarre mixture of laughing with it and at it but there is also genuine affection. 

I think it’s popular for the cool kidz to hate this film. I don’t.

 

8 – Shame - January

http://karina-mundanerambling.blogspot.co.uk/2012/01/shame.html

 

January 2012 and Shame are now a very long time ago but this was the film that confirmed beyond any doubt the acting ability of Michael Fassbender. 

I will never understand how Fassy didn’t get Oscar nominated for his performance.

 

7 – [REC] 3: Genesis - November

http://karina-mundanerambling.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/rec3-genesis_11.html

 

[REC] and [REC]2 didn’t get a cinematic release and [REC]3: Genesis did not break tradition. 

I love the [REC] franchise but unfortunately the shift in tone and style for the third offering was so jarring it became the weakest of the series so far.  On another day the over the top gore and humour would have been enjoyable but as a [REC] film it felt totally out of place. 

I was expecting the changes before I watched the dvd and was well prepared for them but I still can’t help but feel disappointed by what I saw.

 

6 – The Avengers - April

http://karina-mundanerambling.blogspot.co.uk/2012/04/avengers-avengers-assemble.html

 

There was a toss-up between The Dark Knight Rises and The Avengers for a place on the list – both were great films in their own rights but The Avengers wins a spot on the list because of the goose-bump inducing Avengers Assemble moment which still packs a punch on dvd. The Dark Knight Rises dvd has yet to be purchased.

It'll take something special for the sequel to top this moment

The Dark Knight Rises is the final instalment of Nolan’s epic trilogy but The Avengers started off with Iron Man in 2008 and built from there. 

The Avengers brought all of the characters together in a film that made sense to a non-comic-book-reading fan.  Seeing the members of the team work together as one solid unit during the Battle for New York was one of the most memorable moments of the year.
 

5 – The Woman in Black - February

http://karina-mundanerambling.blogspot.co.uk/2012/02/woman-in-black.html

 

I had read The Woman in Black and seen the play prior to the film being announced so there was a ridiculous amount of excitement for the big screen adaptation.

Aside from being an excellent film what made the Woman in Black memorable was that my friends and I rocked up to the cinema on Valentine’s Day only to find that the queue was out the door and around the street.  This was an amazing achievement for romance in our bleak little town and the only single people in the vicinity turned around and went home.  We viewed The Woman in Black on 15 February 2012.

I didn’t warm to the casting of Daniel Radcliffe until I watched the film and was more relieved than surprised that I didn’t see Harry Potter.  The director, James Watkins, is hopefully one to keep an eye on.

The Woman in Black is one of the best horror films of the year.
 

4 – The Snapper - September/October (?)

 

The Snapper is an Irish comedy from 1993 in which teenager Sharon Curely falls pregnant after a drunken one night stand.  The family deal with the pregnancy in a typically hilarious and unsympathetic Irish manner.   

The humour is similar to the comedy in The Guard right down to the casual racism.  Everything about The Snapper is distinctly Irish and I love it for that reason alone.

I saw The Snapper at the Belfast Film Festival and my biggest regret of 2012 was not asking Stephen Frears for an autograph when I was standing beside him.
 

3 – Chronicle - February

http://karina-mundanerambling.blogspot.co.uk/2012/02/chronicle.html

Right when we were all getting bored of found-footage Chronicle came along with a shoe string budget and sci-fi setting and created one of the best films of the year. 

It was a fantastic achievement and breathed new life into a dying fad.  It'll be interesting to see what director Josh Trank does with the Fantastic Four reboot (IMDB).
 

2 – The Grey - January

http://karina-mundanerambling.blogspot.co.uk/2012/01/grey.html

 

The Grey is another of my favourite films of 2012.  It was bleak, cold and the consent but mostly unseen threat of the wolves created a genuinely tense experience.  It didn’t do Liam Neeson’s reputation as a badass any harm either.

I am blessed by being part of a Nerdy Trio that practically lives in the cinema but The Grey was the first time that I had ever ventured there on my own.  This was a decision that almost backfired during the ridiculously stressful and realistic plane crash as there were no hands to hold.
 

1 – I Saw the Devil - August

http://karina-mundanerambling.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/i-saw-devil.html

 

I Saw the Devil was originally released in 2010 but as I am always a good few steps behind everyone else I didn’t see the film until August 2012 and only viewed it on the recommendation of a fellow blogger.

I don’t normally go for uber violent films and because of this revenge thrillers are almost at the bottom of my list of films to watch. 

I Saw the Devil is a welcome exception to the rule.  I love everything about this film – the plot is strong from start to finish and the performances of Byung-hun Lee and Min-Sik Choi are exceptional.

There is violence, blood and gore but it is never over the top. There are some scenes, for example a little quiet moment with blood covering snow, which are eerily beautiful. 

After Senna last year I wasn’t sure what deserved the number 1 spot for 2012.  As soon as I looked through my blog I Saw the Devil was the obvious choice.  

I Saw the Devil was memorable for being an excellent film but more so as it was from a genre that I (still) purposely avoid.