Shit Quotes

“Sometimes I act like I have my shit together more than I do. Sometimes I act like I don’t have my shit together as much as I do. I’m done acting. I’d rather just be okay with however together my shit is at the time, and still do my best to show up, as I am.”
― Scott Stabile

“It's not the shit we face that defines us, it's how we deal with it.”
― Ahmed Mostafa

“You're a shit cake with cum for whipped cream and dynamite for candles.”
― Ahmed Mostafa

“That's all I can tell you. once you get into cosmological shit like this, you got to throw away the instruction manual.”
― Stephen King, It

“Every word serves a purpose. It conveys an idea. And the idea behind words like feces, stool, or poop is exactly the same as behind the word shit. They all conjure up the same mental image in your head. So why are stool and poop "good" words, and shit is a "bad" word? Who decided that, and why am I bound by that decision?”
― Oliver Markus Malloy, Bad Choices Make Good Stories - Going to New York

“Jayden went for my fries, ignoring Anna’s narrowed gaze. “Thanks, babe.”
“You two know each other?” Jo gestured between Jayden and me with her fork.
Before I could nod, he dropped an arm over my shoulders. “She’s my bae.”
I grinned.
“Bae?” Keira sighed. “I hate that word. Do you know what it really means?”
“Poop,” I answered without thinking. “In Danish.”
My eyes widened. Holy crap. I’d spoken without hesitation at lunch! Holy crap! No one recognized my internal freak-out over it, but I couldn’t believe it. I sat there and spoke with no problem.
I needed to give myself a cookie.
Anna giggled. “Oh, man. I know. I know. Still think it’s a cute word.”
Across from her, Keira rolled her eyes. “It literally means shit.”
“Mallory is the shit, though.”
― Jennifer L. Armentrout, The Problem with Forever

“Humans listen to their hearts so fucking loud that they mute their dumbass brains.”
― The Fart Blast

“Hiya, Alex. I missed you tonight."
My gaze rests on Sam. "Yeah, I see how much you missed me."
"Sam? Oh, I don't really like him," she coos, coming close. I can smell the mota radiating off her. "I'm waiting for you to come back to me."
"Not gonna happen."
"Is it because of your stupid chemistry partner?" She grabs ray chin, trying to force me to look at her, her long nails digging into my skin.
I grab both her wrists and pull them aside, all the time wondering how my tough-as-nails ex-girlfriend turned into a tough-as-nails bitch. "Brittany has nothin' to do with you and me. I hear you've been talkin' shit to her."
"Did Isa tell you that?" she asks, her eyes narrowed into slits.
"Just back off," I say, ignoring her question, "or you'll have a lot more to deal with than a bitter ex-boyfriend."
"Are you bitter, Alex? Because you don't act bitter. You act like you don't give a shit."
She's right. After I found her sleeping around, it took me a while to get over it, get over her. I wondered what other guys were giving her that I couldn't.
"I used to give a shit," I tell her. "I don't now.”
― Simone Elkeles, Perfect Chemistry

“Why do some people feel offended by the word shit, but not by the word poop? Because some little old lady at the FCC decided that
good citizens don't use the word shit, and suddenly using a word like shit or fuck becomes an act of civil disobedience. Suddenly a little four-letter word has the power to shock.”
― Oliver Markus Malloy, Bad Choices Make Good Stories - Going to New York

“ Carajo!" Paco says, throwing down his lunch. "They think they can buy a U-shaped shell, stuff it, and call it a taco, but those cafeteria workers wouldn't know taco meat from a piece of shit. That's what this tastes like, Alex."
"You're makin' me sick, man," I tell him.
I stare uncomfortably at the food I brought from home. Thanks to Paco everything looks like mierda now. Disgusted, I shove what's left of my lunch into my brown paper bag.
"Want some of it?" Paco says with a grin as he holds out the shitty taco to me.
"Bring that one inch closer to me and you'll be sorry," I threaten.
"I'm shakin' in my pants."
Paco wiggles the offending taco, goading me. He should seriously know better.
"If any of that gets on me--"
"What'cha gonna do, kick my ass?" Paco sings sarcastically, still shaking the taco. Maybe I should punch him in the face, knocking him out so I won't have to deal with him right now.
As I have that thought, I feel something drop on my pants. I look down even though I know what I'll see. Yes, a big blob of wet, gloppy stuff passing as taco meat lands right on the crotch of my faded jeans.
"Fuck," Paco says, his face quickly turning from amusement to shock. "Want me to clean it off for you?"
"If your fingers get anywhere close to my dick, I'm gonna personally shoot you in the huevos," I growl through clenched teeth.
I flick the mystery meat off my crotch. A big, greasy stain lingers. I turn back to Paco. "You got ten minutes to get me a new pair of pants."
"How the hell am I s'posed to do that?"
"Be creative."
"Take mine." Paco stands and brings his fingers to the waistband of his jeans, unbuttoning right in the middle of the courtyard.
"Maybe I wasn't specific enough," I tell him, wondering how I'm going to act like the cool guy in chem class when it looks like I've peed in my pants. "I meant, get me a new pair of pants that will fit me, pendejo. You're so short you could audition to be one of Santa Claus's elves."
"I'm toleratin' your insults because we're like brothers."
"Nine minutes and thirty seconds."
It doesn't take Paco more than that to start running toward the school parking lot.”
― Simone Elkeles, Perfect Chemistry

“We got to see a Corsair ship up close – all matt black, no markings, no lights – and practically invisible out here in the dark! What a sight to behold! Most people don’t get to see those bastards up close. That is, for very long! Anyways, the ship was just floating there, no sign of life. Our hails weren’t being answered, and so we assumed the ship was dead in space. Captain Mulligan, gods-rest-his-soul, told me to form a boarding party of security and medics from the sickbay and that we were going over there. We weren’t a military ship, and we’re not Star Marines, so we were lightly armed and quite nervous. I mean, this wasn’t just some of my security section being called out to break up a fight at one of the bars on the promenade, this was serious life-and-death shit! So I said ‘okay’, and told my assistant supervisor, Lisa Garfner, to get them all together. Seven of us shifted over to the other ship with the transmatter (you still use those things, I take it?) not knowing what to expect. It could’ve been anything… and it was. It was crazy.”
― Christina Engela, Space Vacation

“... If I wanna shit I am going to buy it from the shop... what I need now is a friend on which I can count on... you know the drill.”
― Deyth Banger

“The shield wall reeks of shit, and all a man wants is to be home, to be anywhere but on this field that prepares for battle, but none of us will turn and run or else we will be despised for ever. We pretend we want to be there, and when the wall at last advances, step by step, and the heart is thumping fast as a bird’s wing beating, the world seems unreal.”
― Bernard Cornwell, The Flame Bearer

“You will not say how you are haunted by the faces of the men you killed, how in their last gasp of life they sought your pity and you had none. You will not speak of the boys who died screaming for their mothers while you twisted a blade in their guts and snarled your scorn into their ears. You will not confess that you wake in the night, covered in sweat, heart hammering, shrinking from the memories. You will not talk of that, because that is the horror, and the horror is held in the heart’s hoard, a secret, and to admit it is to admit fear, and we are warriors.
We do not fear. We strut. We go to battle like heroes. We stink of shit.”
― Bernard Cornwell, The Flame Bearer

“Now he sat alone; on a disabled starship about fifty years from anywhere on conversion drive – assuming he still had that. Insurance was a good thing – a very good thing - but it wasn’t going to help him much out here. The highlight of his afternoon was going to be staring at the blinking bridge instrumentation – which just happened to be running on the emergency batteries and actually blinking, like for real. Moreover, since his mutinous crew had made off with the Short Shit, the ships only shuttle, he was facing quite a problem”
― Christina Engela, Blachart

“What people these days watch!?
...

Nothing useful!

Science proofs that people watch shit over and over and over and over and over and over.”
― Deyth Banger, 4 Hours

“If you look at the evolution of the brain, the logic centers, they were growing at the same time as the creative centers were expanding. And that creates this really potent illusion that you’re not just a bag of chemicals reacting to shit. Which is what you are.”
― Tim Cannon

“That's shit and it hasn't anything doing with what I am searching for....”
― Deyth Banger, BuZoever

“Shit on me. Cold wet balls for more than thirty blocks. This is really going to suck major ass.”
― Jason Medina, The Manhattanville Incident: An Undead Novel

“Very clever but dumb at shoothing... dumb as a person but clever at shooting. That's LOGIC!”
― Deyth Banger, Reddit Collection

“He has a mouth, lord," Gerbruht said.
"I envy him," I said.
"Envy him, lord?"
"Most of us have to lower our trews to shit.”
― Bernard Cornwell, The Flame Bearer

“Sometimes I’m irrational, I know I am, but even irrational thought feels very, very real when you’re in the middle of shit.”
― Kim Holden, So Much More

“I used to think that size does not count, until I realized that most people either find other people’s faeces more disgusting than a bird’s droppings, or they do not find the latter disgusting at all.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“If you hate it... you close it!
If you can't do it... you don't do it...!
...

Don't try from shit to make gold!”
― Deyth Banger

“You prank me
…

You fuck with me
…

You screw me up

…
Now is my time, get ready for the extra shit.”
― Deyth Banger

“50 Zen, read shit.... BECOME MASTER!”
― Deyth Banger

“А вот еще сильное ощущение. Помню, однажды во втором классе я почему–то опоздал на школьный автобус, и пришлось маме везти меня в школу. Ей надо было на работу, а школа еще не открылась, так что я минут 15 стоял с портфельчиком и ждал. И там же стояли двое пятиклассников, одетых, как враги Джеймса Дина из фильма «Бунтарь без причины». Стояли болтали — настоящие хулиганы — и тут я услышал это слово: «shit». Раньше я никогда его не слышал. Однако почему–то мгновенно понял, что оно означает. Я был: поражен. Очень сильное впечатление — очень.”
― Iggy Pop, I Need More

“Why do some people feel offended by the word shit, but not by the word poop? Because some little old lady at the FCC decided that good citizens don't use the word shit, and suddenly using a word like shit or fuck becomes an act of civil disobedience. Suddenly a little four-letter word has the power to shock.”
― Oliver Markus Malloy, Bad Choices Make Good Stories - Going to New York

“Everyone got a follower, how good or bad is all this shit, it's another topic… JUst leave it for later.”
― Deyth Banger

“Shit stinks. The stench serves as a warning to us not to eat our own feces.”
― Herman Koch, Summer House with Swimming Pool