Bring On Lemons

  If you read yesterday's post, you know I was a little befuddled when it comes to Valentine's Day this year. In past years, the gifts on the table were definitely chosen by mom, but the kids were always led to believe they were from mom and dad or sometimes just dad. Mom would pretend along with the kids to be completely surprised by all the sweet things.  I wasn't going to do anything. I really wasn't - but I couldn't help myself. I woke up Valentine's Morning and looked at the empty table and missed my Daddy oh so much and longed for that feeling again. You know the one, the warm fuzzy feeling you get when you feel loved unconditionally. The feeling you get when you know someone loves you with a sacrificial deep love that transcends everything!  I put sweet little gifts by everyone's spot at the table - even my own. There were cards and love notes and no mention of who provided the magic. It was simply there and everyone enjoyed exploring their gifts and ...

It's a gorgeous day here - the sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and it was warm enough to leave my sweater at home. It's certainly not the weather that put me in a bit of a funk this morning ... and I'm not sure if that's the best way to describe my emotions anyway ... let me explain: I've been the super busy burning the candle at both ends person. The one who feels under appreciated and over-worked as well as the one with that voice inside screaming "what about what I want? Does NOBODY care what I want?" When I was living that life, I thought I was doing a good job being mindful of others. I would talk about 'perception is everything' and I thought I was being careful of my tone, my body language, and choosing my words carefully. You get the picture. I felt like I was walking on a tightrope that was a bit frayed on one end - I knew eventually the darn thing was going to give and I was going to plummet toward the ground. I didn't think...

Appreciation - Priceless What's on my mind today? Well... lots of stuff really, but if I shared everything you would certainly lock me up and throw away the key (not because it's illegal, but because the inner workings of ones mind can be a scary place and you might label me insane). So - what can I share today? I guess I'll share something that was said to me this morning: Many of you know that I'm a church musician/organist and if you didn't, now you know! It's not that it's a bad gig at all, in fact I love it! The problem is that most people don't ask and may never know what goes into being a church musician. Most of us took more than ten years of lessons meaning weekly sessions with an instructor or a nun and then daily practicing at home (twice daily if our parents insisted), and now we spend hours each week carefully choosing our music, practicing our foot pedals, left hand, right hand, everything together, etc... and then, comes the big moment...

If you were a boat, the following could be said: When the waves are tossing you about and the turbulence is more than you can bear you return to port. Returning to the safety of the harbor where you find refuge and safety among others of your kind. Life isn’t entirely different than sailing. When a woman feels as if her very being is shattering – during childbirth – she calls out for her mother. Our natural instinct is to return home. Sometimes home is a town, a building, the loving arms of friends and family, and sometimes it is merely a smell or a memory. I place we long to be but can never find in the physical sense. I feel that way myself from time to time. I seek the camaraderie of a particular melody or the words of a poem. Today it was the lovely words written nearly one hundred years ago by poet Amy Lowell. I have a delightful text book from 1923 that describes Amy in the following way: No one has fought, in theory and in practice, the battles for the experimental a...

Today, I received a very polite email letting me know that I had not won a literary contest I had submitted a story to. For some reason (call it human nature if you will) rejection brings me to a funny place. I hear every negative comment that has ever been called to my attention. Those thoughts fill my mind and I fight them off saying 'Crystal, not everyone can win. Toughen up. Where's that lemonade attitude you talk about?' and then I start second guessing myself. 'Who are you to tell other people to be positive when you're sinking into the muck and mire of negativity?' on and on.... And then - I am reminded to breathe. Life comes with it's very own phone-a-friend option when you don't have all the answers. I grabbed my phone and called a friend. Sent an email to my husband. Wrote in my journal. I started to hear positive encouragement. I saw the love in my children's eyes. I remembered that Dr. Suess was rejected numerous times before becoming...

The days go by too quickly. It's hard to believe how much of my 'to do' list doesn't get done. Some days it's hard to believe everything that has transpired - at times I feel defeated and sometimes I amazing myself with my strength. For the last few weeks, as the sun goes down, only one song comes to mind. These lyrics are amazing, and Diana Krall's performance is even more amazing. If you have a chance, she will be performing in Milwaukee, Wisconsin on July 16th at 6pm at the Riverside BallRoom. To learn more about Diana, visit her site:  http://www.dianakrall.com/news.aspx And now for those touching lyrics that ring oh so true and sometimes bring a tear to my eye: Narrow daylight entered my room shining hours were brief winter is over summer is near are we stronger than we believe I walked through halls of reputation among the infamous too as the camera clings to the common thread beyond all vanity into a gaze to shoot you through ...

My child, You wonder why I hug so tight and why I'm always kissing you, Someday you'll understand. I realize how quickly you have already grown and I know, Soon you'll be an adult. You once couldn't wait to sit on my lap or softly kiss my cheek, Those moments are fewer. I love each of our milestones and I couldn't be prouder of you, You amaze me each day. No matter how big you get, I'll always want just one more moment, To love and hold you close. Love, Mom

Mother's Day began as a way for families affected by the Civil War to gather and share ideas about promoting peace - the idea was began around 1870 in Boston, Massachusetts and eighteen cities in American participated in the day for peace in 1873. Over time, people lost interest. In 1907 the idea came up again by Anna Jarvis of West Virginia to celebrate her mother's life (and death in 1905). The larger event Jarvis organized took place in 1908 at Andrew's Methodist Episcopal Church in Grafton, West Virginia which is why there is now an International Mother's Day Shrine located there today. The idea began catching on and in 1914 was declared a national holiday by then President Woodrow Wilson. Some of us think of mother's day as a 'Hallmark Holiday', but it's origins began as a way to share, and as a movement toward Peace. What will you do this mother's day? Please share your thoughts and ideas below, or use the comments of this post as a way t...