Jonah Hex V2 #6 "Goin' Back to Texas in a Box"

Jonah Hex V2 #6 Jun 2006
"Goin' Back to Texas in a Box"
Jimmy Palmiotti and Justin Gray - story, Luke Ross - art, Brian Bolland - cover

The Plague of Salvation - A man is dragging himself across the desert sands. He is covered in sores. A shadow falls across him as a rider comes upon him and we see about seven more bodies in the sand behind the man, all of them having drug themselves across the desert.

Jonah puts the man onto his horse and they both ride to the nearest town, a small outfit in the middle of nowhere, ringed with a wire fence and flying a flag. As Hex nears the town armed guards confront him and he asks if they have any medicine, it appears that his passenger has the Plague. The guards inspect the man and find that he is dead. They are also curious how Jonah got past the Apache that have cut off the town from civilization. Hex replies, "Quietly".

As Jonah rides on into town we overhear a hushed conversation between two nuns, Sister Agatha (played by Linda Hunt) and Sister Evelyn. Agatha tasks Evelyn with 'washing up' and bringing the dead man back so they can inspect him.

Hex continues on into town, riding past a flagpole flying a blue flag and a red flag on the ground. Hex ends up at the saloon where he is informed by the bartender (played by Geoffrey Lewis)that Salvation is a dry town. Jonah inquires about the flags and learns that the town is beset by Apache raids, blue flag means it's all quiet, red means trouble is coming. Jonah asks for a room where he can wash up and Lilly, the bar girl, offers to take him upstairs.

In the room, Lilly lounges on the bed. Hex asks when the plague hit town and she says that it started about a week ago. Hex asks when the last Apache raid was and Lilly says that he shouldn't ask so many questions and that he should hop in bed with her. Hex declines and the conversation continues..

..and is interrupted by a NUN WITH A GUN!!! Evelyn shows up with a shotgun and tells Lilly to clear out. Lilly leaves but stays right outside the door, eavesdropping. She learns that Evelyn is warning Hex to leave town and that Hex and Evelyn actually know each other from before Jonah's scarring. Jonah mentions that seventeen years have gone by but Evelyn interrupts him again, saying that HER scars are not as evident, but she has them all the same.

Lilly has now made tracks out of the saloon and over to the other nuns who have gathered in the street. The nuns round up a few men and they all head over to the saloon and up to the room. Evelyn is warning Jonah to leave Salvation, the town is run by Sister Agatha and he MUST get away. Just then, Sister Sarah bursts in and tells Evelyn that lying is a sin, worse than trying to bed Jonah for her own pleasure (this according to Lilly). One of the men punches Jonah and he retaliates, tempers flare and guns are raised. Evelyn jumps in front of Jonah and confesses that she tried to bed Jonah but he refused, he is no sinner. Sarah states that Agatha will decide that.

Shortly thereafter, we see Jonah and Evelyn bound and gagged in the middle of the street. They are tied to a large pole atop a huge bundle of wood and it appears that they will be burned at the stake. The townsfolk gather around for the burning and Sister Agatha shows up carrying a torch and a small child. Several dozen children fall into step behind her.

Trial by Fire - Agatha approaches the stake and tells Jonah that it is heathens like him that try to corrupt the children, she tells the kids to gaze upon the scarred face of evil and then she whispers under her breath "Don't ever think I forgot you, Jonah Hex."

The townsfolk have started throwing rocks and Agatha is gloating about destroying the wicked,, however, we are privy to seeing over a dozen Apache sneak into town and make their way right up to where the burning will take place.

What happens next is one of the most cinematic sequences in comic book history and rather than destroy it with words, I'll let the pictures speak for themselves...

Hex confronts Agatha, saying she got lucky in Juarez and now she is hiding behind children. Agatha states that the Lord is watching over her now but Hex slaps her to the ground, picks her up and throws her out the window and into the street. Hex exits the building with several children attacking him. He tells the townsfolk to get their brats off of him and then he walks over to Agatha and uses his boot to grind her face into the broken glass in the street.

Hex pulls out a wanted poster for Mary B. Norton and addresses the Apache, telling them they have fought well this day, but this place is poisoned, they should take their dead and go home. He then turns to the town and tells them to let the Apache go or he will kill them all. Agatha rears up, pulls a knife and buries it in Jonah's right thigh and she takes off running. Hex pulls the knife out and draws his pistol but a shot rings out and Agatha falls dead in the street. Lilly is standing there with a smoking shotgun.

Hex points to Agatha's body and says "Put that in a cheap box." Then he picks up the burned body of Evelyn and says....

Statistics for this Issue

Men Killed by Jonah - 4

Running Total - 534 (432 past, 55 future, 15 Vertigo, 32 V2)
Jonah's Injuries - Punched, almost burned, shot in right shoulder, stabbed in right thigh
Timeline  - At the latest, Hex knew Evelyn in 1866 (right before he was scarred) placing this at the latest 1883. At the earliest, he knew her after he was rescued from the Apache (1854) but he was only 16 then. From their discussion, I would figure that Hex was at the very least 19, placing their meeting in 1857 so this story could be as early as 1874. Figure in Mei Ling that means that this could have taken place in 1874, or 1877-1883. (I'm leaving 75 & 76 alone for reasons of the marriage and family turmoil and the trip to China)
Rape Percentage - 33% (2 out of 6)

This has to be one of my favorite stories and I'm afraid that I won't be able to properly convey the awe that I have for this issue. Everything in this is pitch perfect.

The burning sequence shown above so wonderfully portrays the hysteria and the confusion at the burning, how Hex works at getting the fire put out, getting shot in the shoulder, the bullet holes in the trough, the holes in the bucket, each drop of water hitting the dirt before it can douse the flames and finally Jonah realizing that Evelyn will die. Finally, there is that horrible agony of the fatally burned Evelyn, being held in Jonah's arms, asking for nothing more than one last kiss and then..THEN.. to have that denied by the Apache arrow that runs her through and lodges in Hex as well. I was almost in tears.

And the savagery of Hex afterwards. He doesn't scream her name, he doesn't vow to avenge her. He picks up and throws the Apache in to the flames, shoots a man and then hurls the bullet riddled corpse at more attackers, beats the hell out of Agatha and grinds her face into the broken glass in the dirt.

Finally...FINALLY, he hands out the best justice to Lilly as we know he will force her to dig Evelyn's grave with her bare hands.

Slap a Bolland cover on that and we are talking perfection folks (Why couldn't they have done THIS issue for the Jonah Hex movie? WHHHHHHYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?!?!?!?) This issue is worth easily triple the $2.99 cover price.

Man, I get chills just TALKING about this book. I better stop now, I'm getting light headed.

Next Issue - A Wedding, a thunderstorm, and then all Hell breaks loose.

Jonah Hex #70 "The Mountain of the Manitou!"

Jonah Hex #70 Mar 1983
"The Mountain of the Manitou!"
Michael Fleisher, story - Dick Ayers & Tony DeZuniga, art - Ross Andru & Dick Giordano, cover

Jonah is kicking the dead carcass of White Claw into a hastily dug grave outside the snowbound cabin where he and Emmy Lou Hartley were holed up. Emmy comes slowly out of the cabin and Jonah chastises her for being up and around so early after being stabbed. She says that she has been cooped up in that cabin for a month now (assuming she means from when she first brought Jonah there) and winter has started. If they don't leave soon, they'll be stuck there for the entire winter.

As they ride off, Emmy asks if Jonah is going to go after the last man responsible for Cassie Wainwright's death. Jonah tells her that fifteen years is too long to hold a grudge and he is just gonna move on.

Meanwhile, several miles away, Ernest Daniels is confessing his past sins to his pastor. He unloads, telling of the theft of $100,000.00 and the death of Cassie. Daniels explains how he has built an orphanage, the town hall and the school, all in an attempt to ease his guilt. The pastor suggests confessing to Cassie's husband and asking for forgiveness. Daniels explains that she had a fiancee and he thinks he knows where to locate him.

That evening, Daniels is packing his bags and he two grown sons are quizzing him about his travels. he explains that he has business with Jonah Hex, showing them a newspaper touting a headline about Jonah killing a hired gun in Gravesboro. He tells them he is heading for there in order to locate Hex.

Several hours later, we find Jonah and Emmy crouching behind some boulders on the outskirts of the Shoshone village where he recently escaped. Jonah is bound and determined to get his dragoons back. Jonah jumps out of his hiding place and beats the crap out of two sentries and sets fire to a tee pee to cause a distraction. Running through the camp, he ducks into the chief's tent, punches the old chief unconscious, grabs his holster, guns, and hat. Heading out of the camp, he catches an arrow in his right shoulder and guns down the Indian that wounded him. Running hell-bent for leather, Jonah finds Emmy waiting with a couple of horses and they make their escape.

Several hours later, they have set up camp and Emmy has removed the arrow from Jonah's shoulder when they hear gunfire. They head out to investigate.

The gunfire is coming from Jason Daniels (son of Ernest Daniels) and several men hiding atop a cliff, firing down on a carriage driven by Ernest Daniels and his other son Tim. Jason is hoping to kill his dad & brother in order to inherit the entire Daniels fortune. Just then Jonah & Emmy come running up and Jonah is just able to knock Daniels out of the way of more gunfire.

The four of them are holed up in a ditch when Daniels recognizes Jonah and vice versa. They are unable to make an escape into the woods, so Jonah has Emmy grab a rope from their horse and they all head for a nearby cliff. Jonah throws the rope around a large boulder and tosses it over the side, letting it snake towards the river below. Jonah orders everyone over the side. Daniels slides down, followed by Emmy, Tim and finally Jonah.

Sadly, the rope doesn't reach the river and the four of them are dangling in the air. Of course, the rope breaks, throwing the four of them into the raging river. They manage to grab onto a huge log and after several minutes of churning through the rapids, they hear the upcoming waterfall. Jonah, using the rope they still have, manages to lasso a tree on the bank and pull them all to safety.

Once on the shore, they make their way to a nearby cave in the cliff face to find shelter. All they find is a quick clubbing to the head.

When they awaken, they are all tied up and are face to face with the Great Manitou. Ke'tci Manitowa (aka Great Manitou) says that he knows they have been following him, trying to locate his secret shrine and learn of his plans. Several years ago the Manitou had a dream of a great war between the whites and the Indians. The Indians were almost completely wiped out, except for those who followed him to the great cave in the mountain, where he had stockpiled provisions. For decades the Indians hid in the mountains and when they finally emerged they started a massive war against the whites, killing them all and returning the land to the Indians with the Manitou as their god.

Jonah starts to tell the Manitou what he thinks but all he gets is a kick in the face for his troubles. The Manitou then reveals that it will be HE that will start this war between the whites and the Indians and he will start it tonight by exploding a cliff over the Little Rainbow River, blocking the river and flooding the entire Campanas Valley. He will plant an Indian medallion at the scene of the explosion and the whites will riot against the Nazis....uh, the Indians. Anyway, the Manitou finishes his rant, gathers up his minions and departs.

Left guarded by a lone Indian, Jonah thinks of how to escape. He tells Emmy to pull some bullets from his gunbelt. She pulls them out and hands them to Jonah. Hex manages to flip the bullets into a nearby fire. When they go off, Jonah tells the Indian that it's their friends come to rescue them. As the Indian comes closer, Jonah launches himself headfirst into the Indian's groin. The Indian knocks himself out on a rock and Emmy is able to grab the knife that the guard dropped.

Emmy cuts everyone loose and they begin their escape. Sadly they can only locate one horse, so Jonah decides to head out on his own but he is suddenly stopped by Jason Daniels and three of his thugs. Jason is there to collect on his inheritance!!!



Statistics for this Issue
Men killed by Jonah - 1
Running Total - 378
Jonah's Injuries - knocked out, arrow in right shoulder, kicked in the face
Timeline - Probably only a few days after last issue. This book covers one day, a night, and into the next day. Jonah once again states that we are 15 years past the death of Cassie, putting us in 1874. UPDATE: Nov 1877

This book is another example of Fleisher interweaving multiple plots. We have the Manitou, Jonah's revenge on Daniels, Daniel's son, and more of Emmy. It's a pretty good issue, the crazy Indian doesn't make much sense, but he's a crazy Indian, so how much sense does he HAVE to make?

Next Issue: we wrap up the Cassie revenge story, the Manitou gets what he deserves, and Jonah goes shopping for jewelry, fine Mexican jewelry.

Jonah Hex #68 "Gunfight at Gravesboro!"

Jonah Hex #68 Jan. 1983
"Gunfight at Gravesboro!"

Michael Fleisher, story - Dick Ayers & Tony DeZuniga, art - Gonzales & Dick Giordano, cover

Jonah Hex rides up in front of the Gravesboro Livery when an unknown man calls him out. The man says that he's gonna be world famous for having gunned down Jonah Hex. The only fame he gets is to be number 375 on Jonah's kill list. Yup, Jonah plants one right between the dude's eyes.

Needless to say, but I'll say it anyway, this brings the town sheriff a-running. Jonah recognizes the sheriff as George Rehnquist. George is flabbergasted that it really IS Jonah Hex. He mentions Woodson and doesn't know how Jonah's face got all scarred up so he is obviously an old family friend that hasn't seen Jonah since 1866.

Jonah asks George if he wants to know why the dead body in the middle of the street came to be there. George looks down and says "Barney Gossett?..If'n any man ever needed killin' it wuz thet cold-eyed bully" and then he takes Jonah over to a saloon for a drink.

Later, in the General Store, several of the town leaders have gathered together to hatch a plan. They are wanting to offer Jonah the job of sheriff. Seems George is getting on in years and every crook in the area knows that George can't stand up to them. They decide that they could hire Hex temporarily, just until the town gets a reputation for not being a pushover. Their plan runs into a snag.

Later that night, in Jonah's hotel room, Hex refuses the job. He won't put his friend George out of a job. The fast-thinking town leaders offer the job of deputy to Jonah, mostly in order to keep George from being killed by all the rabble that has infested the town. Jonah decides to accept that offer.

Next morning, several hundred miles away, two men are sneaking up on a barn. They ask a young boy if he has seen a man dressed all in black. The boy says that the man is hiding in the barn. The two men rush into the barn, only to have the doors slammed behind them and barred shut. Outside, the man in black, Kincaid, pays the young boy 15 cents for lying to the two men and then he launches a lit lantern into the barn.

With the barn now ablaze, the two men inside continue to batter the barn doors until they finally break out, only to be cut down by a hail of Kincaid's bullets. Shortly thereafter, Kincaid is at a large ranch collecting his money for killing the two men (who were hired to settle an argument over water rights). Kincaid thanks his employer and states that he now has to settle an old score with Jonah Hex.

Back in Gravesboro, Jonah & George are walking down the street when Arbie, the saloon owner comes flying through his own front glass window. Arbie says that the Ransom boys are tearing up his place. George heads in to calm things down but ends up getting his gun taken away, beer poured on his head and knocked out with a chair. Just as the leader of the Ransoms is getting ready to beat George with a whip, a bullet cuts the whip clean in half.

The leader turns to find Jonah standing in the doorway. The man pulls a gun and.. Well, how can one easily explain what happens next? It's so much better to just show you.



Jonah gets the rest of the gang off to jail and helps George get his bearings.

Three days later and twenty miles away in Nugget Gulch, the entire town (including Michael Fleisher himself!)
is out to witness the hanging of a murdering Indian. The Reverend finally shows up to say a prayer over the condemned but just as the door is almost opened, the reverend produces a pistol from his Bible and shoots everyone on the platform. Holy Crap, the reverend is Kincaid!!!

Kincaid cuts the noose and bonds holding the Indian, White Claw, and they start running through the streets to a pair of horses that Kincaid has stashed. As they are riding out of town, White Claw tells Kincaid that he knows why Kincaid is there, to recruit White Claw in his attempt to kill Jonah Hex. As a note of emphasis, White Claw decides to bury the hatchet, literally, in the forehead of a man trying to shoot them from a second story window.

Later that night, back in Gravesboro, in the local whorehouse, a huge man is shooting up the place and in general busting up everything he sees. George shows up and tells the ruffian to hand over his pistol. The man starts to threaten George and suddenly changes his mind and asks to be handcuffed, he will go quietly. George says that he's glad that he is finally getting respect in the town and the man states that it was only because Jonah was standing behind George that he complied at all.

George tells Jonah that he should be out patrolling and the crook busts up laughing when he realizes that George thought he carried any weight in that town. Jonah heads back to the hotel to grab a couple hours of shuteye so he can relieve George for the late shift.

Meanwhile, George has gotten back to the jail when a man comes running in saying that Farrell Kincaid is in town and will start killing folks unless Jonah Hex shows up. George grabs his shotgun and heads for the saloon. The man asks if he should get Hex and George says that he can handle this himself.

Meanwhile, Jonah is dreaming and we have...

FLASHBACK!!!!

Jonah and the Army men with him return to the fort, the body of Cassie in the wagon behind them. At the fort, Jonah reports to Col. Wainwright about the robbery and the murder of Cassie. The Col. excuses Jonah and locks the door behind him and then...
END OF FLASHBACK!!!

Jonah is awakened to a pounding on his hotel room door. The same man that notified the sheriff of Kincaid being in town tells Jonah that Kincaid has just killed the sheriff.

At the saloon, Kincaid pours himself a drink and then pours one for the dead Sheriff George, who is propped up in a chair, his mouth hanging open. Just then the saloon doors swing open and Jonah walks in, not knowing that White Claw is up on the balcony, ready to ambush him!


Statistics for this Issue
Men Killed by Hex - one
Running Total - 375
Jonah's Injuries - None
Timeline - This one covers about a week, sometime after mid October in 1874, because that is 15 years after 1859, remember? I don't care what some commentators have said, it is 1874. UPDATE: Oct. 1877

The comic elements in this one reminded me of North to Alaska or McClintok! But the best part ended up being the gruesome corpse of George sitting in the saloon. Eeeeeewwwwww, eyes rolled back up in his head, mouth open. It was great. Another good installment in the Cassie Wainwright Saga

Next Issue: Jonah ends up in a Clint Eastwood movie!!!! For reals!!

Jonah Hex #67 "Deadman's Hand!"

Jonah Hex #67 Dec 1982
"Deadman's Hand!"
Michael Fleisher, story - Dick Ayers & Tony DeZuniga, art - Ross Andru (?) , cover

We start the new year with Deadman's Hand, a story where Jonah Hex cuts off the appendage of Boston Brand and then goes and kicks the ass of Rama Kushna just for grins. No, wait, that's wrong.

We start the new year with "Deadman's Hand", the third installment in the Cassie Wainwright saga. The splash page displays a newspaper from Friday, October 5th, stating that Jonah Hex has thwarted the Willow Bend bank robbery. Hmmm, Friday, October 5th. That would be 1872? No, that was a leap year so Oct 5th was on a Saturday. Well, it looks like it would be 1877 or 1866 (nope) or 1883 for this paper to be correct. But we all know this is 1874, right? Riiiiiiight!

Anyways, Said newspaper is being read by one Mr. Croy, a slick gamblin' man who is amazed at the headline, because HE was also involved in the terrible robbery that led to the death of Cassie Wainwright. Needless to say, he gets spooked, thinking that Hex will be on his trail soon. But, he does have time for a game of poker so he can get some traveling money.

During the game, Croy recalls that it has his idea to rob the Fort payroll so his cohorts in crime could pay off their gambling debts to him. During the card game, however, he is caught using a holdout to cheat. The other players start demanding their money and when things get ugly, Croy produces a pistol using another holdout, killing a man. He leaves the saloon, stealing a horse and killing the owner.

A week later and two hundred miles away in Careysburg, New Mexico Jonah rides up to a saloon and finds three smelly cowhands harassing a saloon girl. Jonah walks in and asks the barkeep if the chairs are solid oak. The barkeep affirms that they are and Jonah busts one upside the head of cowpoke #1. Cowpoke #2 gets a beatdown with a chair leg and cowpoke #3 gets thrown into a wonderful upright piano.

The saloon girl, Lisa, tells Jonah that she is fine and would love to have Hex buy her a drink...in another saloon.

Much later that night in Jonah's hotel room, Lisa is admiring Jonah's exploits and saying that if SHE were a man, she would be just like Jonah. She grabs his hat and puts it on, strutting around the room in her undies and then

DIES OF A BULLET RIGHT THROUGH THE HEART!!!!!

Yup, seems the heartless bastard Croy has tracked Jonah down and was across the street in a loft with a rifle. He saw a shadowy figure with a cowboy hat in Jonah's window and let fly with the led.

Back in the room, Jonah grabs his pistols and heads across the street to find absolutely nothing. The next morning, Jonah is seeing to Lisa at the undertaker's when the cowpokes 3 come in, looking for revenge. Jonah calls them scum for killing Lisa and guns down all three confused looking men.

Jonah heads outside and as he is walking down the street, Croy, stationed on a rooftop, shoots Jonah, this time for real. However, it is just a scalp wound and Jonah is taken to the local doctor office where, for 72 hours, he is in a delirium which leads us to..

FLASHBACK!!!!!!!
1859. A corporal comes in to Col. Wainwright's office to announce that the paymaster wagon is overdue. Jonah mounts up with several cavalry with him and heads out looking for wagon. Jonah is able to pick up on the tracks and they find the burnt remains of the wagon as well as...

END OF FLASHBACK!!!
Jonah almost snaps out of it but is still weak.

Down the street, the town crier enters the saloon, announcing that Hex will live. Croy, soaking the locals in poker is stupified, but decides to finish the job later that night.

After dark, he makes his way to the doc's and sneaks in Hex's window. He pulls a knife and stabs the form in the bed, only to find Jonah standing in the shadows. Croy drops the knife and starts fast-talking Hex. Jonah hesitates for a moment and Croy uses the holdout to get a pistol into his hand, but misses his only shot at point-blank range. Jonah returns fire, using two bullets, since lead was cheap back in the day.

Statistics for This Issue
Men Killed By Jonah: 4
Running Total: 374
Jonah's Injuries: Bullet wound to the head.
Timeline: This one covers 10 days in 1874, but the newspaper was from 1877. We won't let a little thing like that bother us, will we? Just remember, 1874, before the wedding to Mei Ling. No mention of her, we are pre-wedding. UPDATE: looks like the newspaper was correct and this was Oct. 1877.

The story itself was pretty good, another small chapter in the Cassie saga. I didn't care for the holdout showing up again, but it had been several years since we last saw one so I guess it is okay to reuse that device. I hated that Lisa bought the farm, getting shot for just wearing Jonah's hat (You listening SallyP & Sea? Don't be playing with men-folk clothes).



Next Issue: Moose hunting, more tragedy visits the Wainwrights and Jonah becomes a lawman!

Jonah Hex #66 "Requiem for a Coward!"

Jonah Hex #66 Nov 1982
"Requiem for a Coward!"
Michael Fleisher, story - Dick Ayers & Tony DeZuniga, art - Ross Andru, cover

Jonah comes riding into the Palomino Creek stage depot looking for a bite to eat. Without provocation, a man pulls a rifle on Jonah and tells him to dismount. While Jonah is ignoring him and riding on by, Hex is suddenly lassoed and pulled from his horse. He lands on his feet and manages to plant a big boot right into the lasso-wielder's groin. Other men join in the fight and now that the odds are 4-1, with Jonah's arms tied, Jonah succumbs to the repeated beatings that are rained down upon him. Jonah's unconscious body is taken away to Willow Bluff, where the men have a meeting with Banker Rod Webster.

Several hours later, Webster is overjoyed to learn that Jonah Hex is dead, HOWEVER, the rotten bandit that is meeting with Webster informs him that Jonah Hex is NOT dead. He and his gang are holding Hex. Since Webster was so quick to pony up $10,000 ($181,000), they thought they could get some MORE money if they killed Hex, otherwise, they would just let him go. Webster is outraged, but what can he do? He agrees to fork over another $10,000 when he has Jonah Hex's head in a gunny sack.

Meanwhile, Jonah is tied up in the blackmailer's cabin, where four men are playing poker. Jonah has learned from overhearing their leader that Rod Webster is behind all of this. While the men aren't watching, Jonah rolls a flaming log out of the fireplace and burns through the ropes holding his hands behind his back. He unties his feet, grabs his pigsticker from his jacket and quickly delivers it into the throat of the first guy that notices the escape. Hex grabs a rafter to swing from it and catapult himself into the three remaining kidnappers.

Once they are down, he grabs his pistols from a nearby hook only to learn that they are empty of bullets. Discretion being the better part of valor, Jonah dives through a window, escaping a hail of gunfire. Jonah mounts up and routes their horses so they can't follow him.

Several hours later in Willow Bluff, Rod Webster is locking up the bank only to discover Jonah Hex standing behind him. Webster practically wets himself in fear. Jonah Hex explains that he has mellowed somewhat over the years and will give Webster until noon to pack up and leave town. Rod Webster hot foots it home.

At his house, Webster has explained the entire situation to his wife, Stella. Stella wants to be very sure what Webster is asking her to do. Webster wants her to put on a sexy low cut dress, some perfume and see if she can 'persuade' Jonah Hex to leave town and leave Webster alone. Stella cites the fact that she only married Webster for money and since he has kept up HIS end of the bargain, she'll give it her best shot, even though the thought of it makes her sick.

Back at Hex's hotel room, he is looking once again at the photo of he and Cassie and he has a...

FLASHBACK: Cassie is skinny-dipping is a river when Jonah suddenly appears on the bank. Jonah teasingly starts undressing and eventually he is in his birthday suit and wades into the water. Despite Cassie's faltering protests, they come together in the river, embrace and..

END OF FLASHBACK!!!!!!
Whew! that was close! We almost got a NSFW rating on this blog. Whew!

Anyway, someone is pounding on Jonah's hotel room door. Jonah opens the door to find Stella Webster, vamping and slowly disrobing as she saunters into his room. Stella introduces herself and says that she would be happy to 'trade' whatever Hex wants for letting her husband go free. Jonah swiftly manhandles her out of the room, saying that he has a name for a man that sends a woman to transact business for him and 'town banker' ain't it.

Back at the Webster household, Stella sulks into the living room, stating that Hex turned her down cold (something I don't think has ever happened to her before). She then states that she wishes that he hadn't because he is more a man than Webster will ever be. With insult added to injury, Webster storms out of the house and over to the cabin of his hired thugs.

At the cabin, Webster DEMANDS that they kill Hex and he won't pay them any more money. The leader agrees to the demands, adding his own. Webster will have to let them clean out the bank vault. Webster explodes.

The next morning, Jonah is trying to choke down his breakfast when the mayor comes in saying that Hex has to help him. The mayor explains that the bank is being robbed and Jonah states that it's a good thing he doesn't have any money in that bank. The mayor corrects him, stating that the town council has a standing reward of $2,500 on anyone trying to rob the bank. Jonah multiplies that by four in his head and is immediately out the door.

Inside the bank, the robbers and Webster are waiting for Hex to show up. The leader decides that they better get going before Hex gets there and when Webster realizes that he has been double-crossed again, they pistol whip him to the floor. The four robbers hightail it outta the bank, but Jonah jumps from the bank room, flattening all of them. He grabs one of them, throwing into the others, but the gang leader recovers and draws on Jonah.

As the leader pulls the hammer back on his pistol, Jonah draws and shoots him dead. Webster comes staggering out of the bank, thanking Hex for stopping the robbery, but the surviving gang members are having none of his bull. They spill the beans on how Webster hired them to kill Hex and that the bank robbery was their payment for doing so.

By now the whole town is in the street and Webster is screaming his innocence. Hex says that he's pretty sorry that he can't hang around to see Webster hang for his crime and starts walking off. Webster grabs a dropped rifle and gets a shot off, hitting Hex in the right arm. Jonah spins and pulls his pistol left handed. Webster screams and drops to the ground, begging for his life. Hex heads for his horse.

Just then Stella Webster stops Hex in the street and offers to bandage his arm. Jonah notes that she isn't GIVING him that handkerchief and she acknowledges that she want something in return...

And Jonah Hex rides off.

Statistics for this Issue
Men Killed by Jonah - 2
Running Total - 370
Jonah's Injuries - Beat up and shot in right arm
Timeline - Just like last issue, this is 15 years after 1859, so we are squarely in 1874. No mention of Mei Ling, just Cassie Wainwright, so this is pre-marriage. Got that? Pre-marriage. 1874. UPDATE: This is 1877.

The story? Hot DAMN this was a good one. Webster was such a coward and in the end he got what he deserved, kneeling in the middle of town, disgraced as a man, a banker, a citizen, and as a human. He would have been better off dead, but the town will handle that for him. I would have liked to have seen Stella Webster show up in the books later on, but her one appearance was very, very noteworthy. And I feel that Jonah giving her what she wanted in the end, was more intended to hurt her husband than to fulfill her fantasy.

Next Issue: A gambler's luck runs out, another face on the photo is tracked down, and the final fate of Cassie Wainwright is revealed.

Jonah Hex #65 "The Vendetta!"

Jonah Hex #65 Oct 1982
"The Vendetta!"
Michael Fleisher, story - Dick Ayers & Tony DeZungia, art - Ross Andru & Zanghal, cover

First off, the cover states "Requiem for a Coward!" but the story is "The Vendetta!" They fix that in issue #66 by putting the wrong title on that cover as well.

But to get started, Jonah Hex is riding a train and spending the time chatting with an elderly woman on her way to St. Louis. We see eight masked men on a hill over the tracks, armed with rifles. As the train passes by, the men leap onto the train. Two robbers burst into the car that Jonah is in and he rewards one of them with a nice shotgun blast to the neck! And just so the dead guy's buddy doesn't feel left out, Jonah gives him one to the chest.

The other robbers, hearing the shotgun blasts, realizes that something has gone wrong, so after grabbing the mail bags, they hightail it. Jonah unloads his horse that was also on the train and realizing that he is losing daylight fast, decides to head into a nearby town and get some sleep before tracking the bandits.

Meanwhile, in that aforementioned town called Clearwater Springs, Sheriff Barstow is commencing with the monthly shakedown of the local business owners. The sheriff charges $30 a month for 'protection' from bandits because the county doesn't pay him near enough. While Barstow is walking down the street, counting his cash, he notices a newcomer to town.

It's Jonah Hex, older and all scarred up, but still Jonah Hex. Barstow panicks and starts to leave town, but then has a better idea. He decides to see if Jonah is just passing through and not looking to settle a score from 15 years ago. Barstow sends a telegram to Rod Webster to see if he can get some help.

Out in the street, Jonah walk past two boys fighting. The shorter of the two is defending the honor of a small girl (the bigger kid called her a name) and of course, the shorter kid knows what time it is because he is getting his clock cleaned. Jonah steps in to break up the fight, just as the big kid's dad shows up. The guy is a huge moose that ends up taking a swing at Jonah. Jonah reciprocates and smacks the guy right into a horse trough.

Barstow ends up running into the jail where is deputies are finishing the local shakedown. They ask why he looks scared and Barstow starts explaining about Jonah Hex. He produces a photograph of several men and a lovely woman. The woman is Cassie Wainwright, daughter of Col. Marcus Wainwright and Jonah was a scout for the army back in 1859. The deputies wonder why Jonah is their problem and Barstow says that their sweet shakedown racket will come to an end if they don't get rid of Hex.

The next morning, Jonah has returned to tracking the train robbers and he finds them in some old Indian cliff dwellings. He locates a rope and manages to slide down to the dwellings without the rope breaking (even though he mentioned the terrible possibility). Jonah kills the two sentrys and is working his way through the buildings when overhears the robbers splitting up the loot, setting aside a share for Sheriff Walt Barstow, to pay for his protection.


Jonah is amazed that it could possibly be the same man that he knows from years ago. He is not too amazed to bust in on the four remaining robbers, subdue them and that them into captivity. Jonah decides that he should take the robbers to a different town, just in case Barstow is who Jonah thinks he is.

That night, Hex heads to Clearwater Springs and breaks into the jail, riffling through the sheriff's desk. He locates the photo and we are treated to a flashback to 1859.

FLASHBACK: Jonah is an Army scout and is spending some time with his fiancee, Cassie Wainwright, daughter of the Colonel of the fort. Cassie is heading into town to pick up her wedding dress and will be riding with the men picking up the payroll for the fort. Barstow is heading up the men heading to Portersville, a nearby town.

On the way into town, one of the other men is saying that Cassie is going to mess up the entire plan, but Barstow says that they have worked too hard for that to happen. In town, Cassie gets her dress and the men pick up the $100,000 payroll (1.8 million today, that's some well paid soldiering going on there). On the way back Cassie notices that they are not heading to the fort, but are heading into Comanche land (placing this fort in either current day Texas or Oklahoma).
She demands that they head back to the fort and Barstow punches her in the mouth to shut her up.

Cassie falls back, striking her head on the wagon, knocking herself out. One of the men see that there are Comanche scouts on the hills and they grab the contents of the strongbox and head out. They leave Cassie unconscious, despite some of the men commenting on the horrible things that Comanches do to white women. END OF FLASHBACK!

Jonah is remembering how he vowed to find those men, but the war came along and 15 years later, he was finding it kinda hard to keep a grudge going. He steps out into the street and finds he is being called out by Sheriff Barstow and two deputies.

Jonah tells the deputies that he has no truck with them and he sees no reason why they should die too. Barstow says that the three of them can kill Hex, but one of the deputies says that he has heard that Jonah Hex has killed six men at once and if Hex is offering him a chance to run away, he'll take it. Both deputies hightail it outta there in no time flat.

Barstow, facing Jonah alone, starts bargaining. Saying that a person can't carry hate for 15 years, Barstow says that he'll get on a horse and Jonah will never see him again. Besides, Hex wouldn't shoot a man in the back. Barstow jumps on a horse and rides outta town, but when he hits the end of the street, he wheels his horse around and comes gunning for Jonah, even though Hex's back is turned.

Jonah wheels, dropping to the ground and drops Barstow with two quick shots. Standing over the sheriff's corpse, Jonah spots a copy of the telegram that was sent to Rod Webster. Jonah, looking to the sky, asks Cassie if he should hunt these men down after fifteen long years. Getting no answer, he decides to get a bottle and do some thinking.

Statistics for this Issue
Men killed by Jonah - 4
Running Total - 368
Jonah's Injuries - none
Timeline - Well, Cassie was left during the robbery back in 1859 and it is 15 years later. Therefore, this is in 1874. Seems pretty safe bet since there is no mention of Mei Ling.

I really enjoyed this issue and this entire arc is one of the better ones in the 80's, right behind the China arc we just finished up. Barstow, calling his deputies cowards, turning tail & running, & finally shooting at Jonah's back was a complete exercise in cowardice itself. Hang on kids, this is gonna be a really bumpy ride.

Update 05/24/09: Due to events that happen later in this arc, this storyline does happen after the China adventure. Since the last of the China adventure was November, 1876 and there is no sign of snow in this arc, I'll start by placing this issue in March of 1877.

Next Issue: Rod Webster gets into twelve kinds of trouble and Jonah goes skinny-dipping. Yup, wet beefcake is on the menu.

Jonah Hex #36 "Return to Fort Charlotte"

Jonah Hex #36 May 1980

"Return to Fort Charlotte"

Michael Fleisher, story - Dick Ayers & Luis Domiguez, art - Luis Dominguez, cover

Jonah Hex is about to enter his hotel room when three men, a short one (Maynard Judson, local banker) and two gorilla-size, stop him and ask if he is indeed Jonah Hex. He admits that he is and turns down what he thinks is a 'welcoming committee' thanking him for capturing the Carley Brothers. But they are not a welcoming committee. The two large thugs beat the crap out of Jonah and throw him over the railing into the saloon below.

When Jonah comes to, he is being attended to by a 'saloon girl' (aka hooker) who sees that Jonah has three broken ribs (okay, she's a hooker with x-ray vision). Judson explains that Painted Butte is a nice town and they mean to keep it that way. They don't cotten to gunfighters and hookers so they put Jonah and the woman on horses and lead them to the edge of town.

As they ride off, the woman keeps pestering Jonah for her to bandage up his ribs but he turns her down. Eventually she almost talks Jonah into a coma (but she does score points for pointing out that she made need Jonah's help to survive in the wild west). Jonah thanks her and asks her name. She meanly wants to know why that is important, is Jonah gonna whisper it in her ear late at night when he tries to kiss her? Jonah replies that he wouldn't even let his horse kiss her.

A short while later they come to an old bridge. The woman gets off her horse and leads it across but when she gets to the middle, the ropes on one end snap. The horse plummets to its death, but the woman grabs onto of the bridge. Jonah unfurls his rope and (with three busted ribs, mind you), lasoos a branch on the far side. He ties off the rope and then travels across, hand over hand. He manages to grab the woman's hand and pulls her up so she is hanging around his neck.

This being a book about Jonah Hex, one of the unluckiest men in the old west, the rope breaks. This being a book about Jonah Hex, one of the LUCKiest men in the old west, he and the woman both survive the fall. But of course, this book is about Jonah Hex, blah bla blah balah balah bala, so he and the woman end up bring surrounded by the Fort Charlotte Brigade. The Brigade clubs Jonah and the woman over the head, knocking them out and then throw across a couple of horses.

Twelve hours later they arrive at Fort Charlotte. KABLAM!!!!!! Yup, my head exploded again. Near as I can figure, they were in far west Texas last issue. It appears in prior issues that Fort Charlotte was back east (like, maybe, South Carolina? But wait, would a Union fort BE in South Carolina?), but obviously you can ride a horse 1600 miles in twelve hours or about 134 miles an hour. KABLAM!!!!!!

Anyway, the Brigade take Jonah and the hooker and toss them in the very same brig that Jonah was held in back in Jan. 1863. Jonah explains the whole terrible history to her and they even find that the tunnel still exists. The hooker then understands that the Brigade plans to re-enact the massacre that happened "more than ten years ago." (placing this story after Jan of 1873, but since folks rarely take into account what month an event happened in addition to the year, I'm leaning toward the year 1874, even though I thought the first part of this story took place in 1878. I can be wrong sometimes. )

Jonah explains the layout of the fort, how you have to crawl through concertina wire, get past the Gatling guns and then through the barbed wire. The hooker gets a bright idea and since Jonah saving her life back on the bridge was the first time a man ever did anything for her without expecting something in return, she smashes a stool over his head, knocking him out. I love hooker-logic.

Outside the fort, the Brigade are watching the perimeter of the fort, waiting for Hex & the hooker to make their escape. Using binoculars in the dark, they are able to see Jonah crawling under the concertina wire. What they are actually watching is the hooker wearing all of Jonah's clothes making the escape. Once past the wire, the hooker trips the wire that sets off the "automatic" Gatling guns. I don't know what is more awesome, a hooker in Confederate greys or automatic Gatling guns.

Our brave little hooker hits the ground in time to avoid all of those bullets and makes her way to the barbed wire. The Brigade is watching her progress and notes that "Hex" will soon find the wire cutters that they left by the fence. Indeed, she does find the wire cutters and the moment she cuts the first wire....

The Brigade is now satisfied that Jonah Hex, their sworn enemy is now dead, all thanks to them hooking up a dynamite detonator to the barbed wire. They ride off to report to Turnbull and return to their families. Off course, the rousing explosion awakens Jonah (he's wearing long-johns, sorry ladies).

We cut to Richmond, Virginia several hours later and find Solomon delivering a telegram to Mr. Turnbull. Turnbull learns that Hex is dead and states that Hex was a formidable adversary "these past ten years". (again, I'm leaning more to 1874, here). The last panel we see Jonah riding off in his long-johns, his tattered clothes clinging to the barbed wire and a makeshift grave of piled stones marking the last resting place of the hooker.

Statistics for this issue
Men killed by Jonah - None
Running Total - 261
Jonah's Injuries - Beaten up, three broken ribs, fell from a bridge, pistol-whipped, hit with a rifle, knocked out with a stool.
Timeline - Well, taking into account the verbal references from the Hooker & Turnbull (two folks that you can always rely on), I'm placing this at 1874.

How did I like the story? Ehhhhh, not so much. The cons? Automatic Gatling guns, lack of geographic knowledge, no real reason for the hooker to die (or even to risk her life), I'm not sure that they had the means to blow something up when a current was broken (via a CUT wire), Jonah & the hooker falling into a canyon & living, Hex landing on his HEAD from the balcony.... The pros? I really really really liked the cover with that perspective.

I guess I would toss this one near the bottom of the barrel regarding Hex stories.

Next Issue: Waterproof dynamite, Harper's Ferry, Chancellorsville, and Jonah decides the outcome of the Civil War.

Jonah Hex #32 "Gunfight at Murphysburg!"

Jonah Hex #32 Jan. 1980
"Gunfight at Murphysburg!"
Michael Fleisher, story - Jose Luis Garcia Lopez, art - Luis Dominguez, cover

The cover blurb states that this is the most spectacular shootout in Jonah Hex's history. It is almost an understatement. This post is going to be pic-heavy, because that is the only way to do this issue justice.

But first, we start out with Jonah riding down into Murphysburg in the spring of 1874. Jonah is looking for Arbee Stoneham, a bounty hunter that humiliated Jonah 8 years ago. We have a nice 2 page recap of last issue and then Jonah arrives in town, heads for the saloon and starts asking about Stoneham's whereabouts. The barkeep says that Stoneham is staying at Minnie Franklin's boarding house on the other side of town, over by the stockyards. A man standing at the bar looks surprised and then sneaks out of the bar.

Jonah orders a steak and the surprised man hightails it across town to the livery stable where he tells everything he has just heard to Jason Crowley and his gang. Crowley wonders if Hex is telling the truth about looking for Stoneham or if it is a cover for tracking down Crowley. Either way, Hex has to pass by the stockyards and Crowley decides that is the best way to ambush Hex.

However, there is an old man up in the hayloft sleeping off a drunk and overhears everything. He crawls out of the loft and finds Jonah has Hex exits the saloon. The old man tells Jonah everything, telling him that Crowley has eleven men in his gang, plus Crowley. Jonah tosses the man a $20 gold piece and decides that Stoneham will have to wait. Hunting down Crowley is business and paying back Stoneham will be pure pleasure and he heads off towards the stockyards.

There is no way that I can do this story and art justice, so I'll just let it speak for itself (with very little commentary)

I love how Jonah in the second frame extends to the bottom of the page.

A wonderful, fantastic page with so much going on, it barely stays on the page.

A perfect angle in the last frame in order to get everything in that we need to see.

Take a close look at the first and second frame to see Jonah hiding by the gate.

I love the corncob pipe!

Statistics for this issue
Men killed by Jonah - 12
Running Total - 255
Jonah's Injuries - shot in right shoulder, shot in left ribcage
Timeline - The whole story takes place in one day in early 1874.

How can I even begin to explain how much I love this story? I realize that 80% of it is due to Lopez's art. The man can set an entire scene and then show us that location from every angle possible and never deviate from it or surprise us with some unexpected element. In the opening shot of the stockyards you see the barn, the windmill, the haywagon, the cattle pen, everything. Each member of the gang is an individual either by dress, choice of hat, or ethnicity. On top of that, you can see all eleven members of the gang in the opening shot in the livery. This man is such an incredible artist and storyteller with his page layouts spilling out of the panels, overlapping and almost leaping off the page. Lopez is one of the three greatest artists/storytellers of all time.

But what about the story? We start with a Jonah that is bent on personal revenge, puts that on hold to conduct a little business (and granted, to save his own live), returns to his mission and then in the end, forgets his personal vendetta and shows some surprising compassion in his final treatment of Stoneham, probably seeing his own possible future in the life that Stoneham now leads. This is near perfect storytelling by Fleisher and coupled with Lopez's cinematic work, this turns out to be one of the top 3 Jonah Hex stories of all time. I just wonder how it would have worked with less dialogue on Jonah's behalf.

Next Issue: Jonah battles predatory sub-prime lending practices. Ok, he doesn't, but a bank mortgage IS involved!!!