What I did on my holidays by Conrad Kinch, aged 37 1/2

An artists impression of John Treadaway enroute to tell me that my copy is late. 

(Squat Trike from the pen of Paul Bonner)

My recent trip to London was a roaring success. Four nights of uninterrupted sleep was magical. Meeting John Treadaway was great fun. Lovely fella - he rather put me in mind of one of the old GW

squat bikers with his beard, ponytail, leather jacket and giant machine. It was definitely a few days of meeting old friends and making new ones. 

The Austrians advance under the command of the doughty Brian Carrick. 

(picture cheerfully thieved from Bob Cordery)

The game on Saturday was magnificent. A spread of 2,000 figures on a playing area sixty feet by sixty feet. I commanded the Swedish contingent (mainly played by Prussians in this instance) and finished the game in the suburbs of Leipzig having done for the Imperial Guard, which will always remain something of a career highlight. The company was excellent. Made some new friends and caught up with some old ones.

I was not in a position to take photographs, but you'll find some good pictures at the fine blogs below. 

Tim's (game organiser) blog

Bob has several reports, so be sure to have a good look around. 

Brian has some good pictures

And David (Napoleon...boo!...hiss!) has some good shots too. 

St. Paul's went a little over board on the incense while I was there. 

(St Paul's survives by Herbert Mason) 

Service at Westminister Abbey was wonderful. St. Paul's was magnificent, I thought it was expensive at first, but wildly underestimated how vast the place is. Worth every penny. Had longish natter with one of the Canons named Mike.  I paid my respects at Wellington's tomb. It always does to remember the local boy.

Gordon's Tomb

(image tea leafed from the Church Monument Society)

I am a great admirer of Charles Gordon and I was strangely moved when I saw his sarcophagus.  I had not realised he was quite so small.  There I think is the difference between having read a thing and knowing it. 

My own, slightly smaller, Gordon. 

My daughter was named Gordon for a day while she was in hospital.  We had settled on a name and when we saw her, we realised that it didn't suit her exactly and it took us a day while we thought of a new one.  I was very tempted to add Gordon as a middle name when I went to register her birth, but forebore at the last moment.  She has his mercurial and exploring temperament. 

I will take her to see her (almost) namesakes tomb someday.

I miscalculated and hadn't realised that the Pre-Raphaelite exhibition at the National Gallery hadn't begun yet, which was a shame. The Horse Guards museum was a joy, particularly as you get to watch the lads at stable duty. I ended up having a long old chat with some of the Ministry of Defence police who were on duty outside. I certainly noticed the greater presence of armed police and talked to several of them around the city, I suppose because it is so unusual from an Irish perspective. They were unfailingly friendly. The thing that really struck me was the number of them with beards - the Met clearly having different regulations on this matter. .

An artist's impression of the National Army Museum

Of the National Army museum, the less said the better. It was the only sour note in an otherwise excellent trip.

I should have listened Tim. I should have listened.  And what only makes it worse is that I missed the Wallace Collection because of it. 

I survived Charing Cross Road and Martins Lane with only minor damage to my wallet. Not many books this trip, but quite a few prints - mostly fashion for Mrs. Kinch and Alice and Pooh Bear for the Kinchlets. There is more framing in my future. 

I'm still wondering if anyone does a suitable train in 20mm

I was very happy to get a single large engraving (done as a special by the Illustrated London News) of "a reconaissance in force" in 1882, which the Egyptians record as the Battle of Kafr el Dawr. It's an engagement that has intrigued me for a while, so I was glad to get it. There was a definite thrill of discovery when I recognised the geography and the regimental numbers in the otherwise anonymous piece.

After that it was home again, home again, jiggity jig. Mrs. Kinch and the Kinchlets seemed none the worse my absence and quite pleased to see me actually. 

Elegant toy soldiers for a more civilised age.

French and Italian troops skirmishing

Author, scriptwriter, bon viveur and friend of Joy & Forgetfulness Julian sent me these pictures about a million years ago. A house fire (crosses self) destroyed a large part of his collection and he's been consoling himself with 30mm semi flats from the turn of the century.  

Aren't they magnificent? 

I don't know much about them and unfortunately, I'm locked out of Facebook messenger at the moment, so I can't access what information he did send to me. 

However, in this as in wine, my appreciation is none the less sincere, for all that my palate is uneducated. 

Bomb chucking anarchist lurking out of shot

Italian hussars I think? 

Red trousers are France!

Austrian lancers

Italian Lancers or possibly Piedmontese

Italian or possibly French artillery I think? 

Austrian gunners

Austrian gunners

A swish Schloss - just the sort of thing you could see Black Michael sneaking out of. 

Modern cavalry - where does one put the lance? 

Frankly I have no idea what these are. 

Prussians in the garden

I think they're up to something 

I used water based yacht varnish - which is nice but took two coats to get the required shine. I think I may have to stick the brain cell endangering oil based version.

I'm reading Mike Embree's "Too Little, Too Late" at present about the Austro Prussian War of 1866.  Which would suggest these chaps are up to skullduggery. 

Sadly I don't think there are any moulds available that would allow me to make additional Prussian infantry. 

Prussians outside Liege - Work in Progress

An officer type and a marching line infantryman

There's something rather delicious about playing hookey from your hobby.  I'm generally pretty good about sticking to a plan, focusing on what I should paint next so that I can play games sooner rather  than later.  I enjoy playing with friends more than I enjoy painting, but I do enjoy painting and every so often it is a pleasure to let ones hair down and just paint something silly. 

From the rear 

I picked these up a few weeks ago.  They were actually a joy to paint, as I know very little about the uniforms of the period and they came with instructions. I didn't agonise about colour choices or anything, just the simple pleasure of slapping paint on lead (or in this case zinc) and doing it with reasonable facility. 

This chap is some kind of Jaeger officer I think 

From the rear, it's a very odd pose. 

A Prussian Line infantryman and an officer who looks like he is short a DJs headset and decks

If I ever use these for anything it will surely be Little Wars and I think I rather prefer the late 19th century to the early 20th from that point of view. With that in mind, I made the supreme sacrifice of heaving my bulk up the stairs and pulling Michael Solka's German Armies 1870-1871 (1) Prussia off the shelf.  Having found an illustration of a line infantryman that I liked, in fetching blue rather than the grubbier feldgrau, I powered ahead. There are not too shabby either, if I say so myself. 

I should also mention Darko Pavlovic, the artist who illustrated the Prussian book.  Not quite in the same league as Angus McBride (but who is), but a lovely clean line. 

I'm quite happy with the blacklining on the canteen. 

I don't hold much with blacklining, but the Devil took hold of me and I dabbled with it a little bit.  It doesn't look too bad actually. 

That pose makes a little bit more sense now, doesn't it? 

The figures are part of a mini diorama with the officers gathered around a map table.  I'll post a few more pictures once I've got them varnished and fit to be seen in good society. 

In my previous life I was the Duke of Wellington - Waterloo 2015 - A Funny Little War

This apparently is available on cafepress

A note with regard to photographs - I have taken care to upload full sized versions of all the pictures that I took.  Because of the nature of the game and the terrain, examining them as is will probably not be very enlightening.  I would encourage you to click on them to make them larger and take a closer look. 

Last week, I took part in a Waterloo Bicentennial Game organised by the Funny Little Wars fraternity. I traveled over to London to take part and it was just wonderful. I met some friends like Tim, who I have known through the blogosphere for years, and others like Bob & Paul, who I'd met in person before. I also had the pleasure of making the acquaintance of some new friends and take part in what was without doubt one of the highlights of my wargaming career. 

Played on a gloriously sunny day this was an epic undertaking involving a lawn area of nearly sixty yards by thirty, over 2000 1/32 scale soldiers and ten players.

The Field of Mars

(shot with the viewers back to Wavre, looking along the Allied position, the 

small cluster of buildings in the left middle ground is Placenoit)

(click to embiggen) 

French Hussars scouting in the distance

(click to embiggen) 

This is a highly subjective, deeply partisan and necessarily fragmentary account of the game. Those of you might prefer a more coherent narrative, should turn to the efforts of Messrs Gow, Cordery and Carrick.  I was enjoying myself far too much to pause to take many pictures and I suppose in many ways, my favourite parts of the battle are absent from this record because I was having far, far too much fun doing to think about recording the moment for posterity. 

A view from La Bella Alliance Farm (I think) - while the French lay out their forces.

(click to embiggen)  

The game began with us laying out troops using small flags, these were thrust into the ground to mark the location of troops, while we unpacked the boxes.  This actually got a little confusing at one point, when I accidentally deployed troops meant for Bob's flank in the centre. 

At the models eye view, the lawn does not seem so flat

(click to embiggen) 

Many wargamers revel in games that involve vast numbers of figures and there is a joy in ranks and ranks of toy soldiers that thrills the heart. But, what impressed me about the game was how open the battle was. Lines formed and columns marched and match stick cannon fire flew across the field, but despite the number of troops, the game never felt claustrophobic. The sheer size of the play area swallowed up even the huge number of troops we were using and left the game feeling quite open and fluid.  

There are a fearful lot of those Frenchers

(click to embiggen) 

Even the huge column of several hundred French figures here didn't feel too weighty and there was none of the wall-to-wall troops that many big games become. There was plenty of maneuvre to be done, which kept the battle short and lively. 

French cavalry probing our line

(click to embiggen) 

These fellows scouted out the defended villages of La Haie Sainte. I had held them with infantry, but did not reveal the artillery I had concealed there until the French cavalry were charging in to assault the squares I had strung between them. 

The Mont St Jean position, which ably defended by "Dead-eye" Carrick

(click to embiggen) 

For the most part, with the exception of some trees and a few buildings, we left the ground to be the ground so to speak, but it wouldn't be Waterloo without the Mont St. Jean ridge.  Bob and Brian kept a goodly portion of our infantry on the reverse of the slope, ready to meet the French attack. Our general plan was to play the French out for as long as possible, so that the Prussians could arrive. 

Mark (or should that be Marc?) moving his French rotters down the road towards La Haie Sainte

What insidious devilry could he be planning? 

(click to embiggen) 

I think I may have broken the code...

(click to embiggen) 

A view of the Allied position before lunch 

(Mont St. Jean to the right, La Haie Sainte. Placenoit out of shot to the left)

(click to embiggen) 

I can not understate how much I enjoyed this game. I am generally the game organiser and the host, so I rarely get to play without having half an eye on what is going on in the game as a whole. Now it is a role that I relish, but it was a departure for me to arrive to play a game and not really have to think about the setup or the scenario or anything other than playing the game for it's own sake. It was a very enjoyable experience.  I think it helped that I purposely decided that I would not think of Waterloo while we were playing.  So rather than trying to map what was occuring to my understanding of the battle, I focused on playing the game as game. 

A brigade of Frog cavalry hoving into view 

(click to embiggen) 

This had the strange somewhat counter intuitive effect that moments in the game seemed to mirror those of the actual battle without us actively attempting to do so.  There was a massive French cavalry attack on my squares in the centre that could have been directed by Sergei Bondarchuk himself.

My brave Scotsmen prepare to receive them in square. 

(click to embiggen) 

Meanwhile, the RHA have been moving up to support the Prussians who were coming in  on our left

(these were some really beautiful old plastics painted by Brian, wonderful)

(click to embiggen) 

I'd been shoring up our left flank with the Household cavalry supported by some Dutchmen, dancing around and generally trying to look intimidating so that the French didn't attempt to drive a wedge between us and the Prussians. Fortunately Blucher - ahem - I mean Anthony cracked on in a style that would have made the mad old hussar proud.  To be honest, he channeled Blucher so successively that the only question is whether he's stopped screaming "VORVARTS!"(1) at things.

My gallant lads shortly after sending the flower of the French cavalry to the knackers yard

(I really wish I had taken more photographs of this...)

(click to embiggen) 

Meanwhile, over on the Allied right, a massive cavalry battle was developing

(click to embiggen) 

The French punched through the Allied line

(click to embiggen) 

The lone survivor of the 18th "Drogheda Cossacks" scoots for the rear

(click to embiggen) 

But he has found spiritual solace

(click to embiggen) 

Blucher (left) and others look on while Mark defends Placenoit from the advancing Prussians

(click to embiggen) 

After the massive cavalry battle on the right, the Prussians began to arrive in force. The French guns ably manned by Mark and Mike (who has curiously managed to be almost entirely absent from these pictures) simply could not knock down enough of them. 

Just look at all those lovely, lovely sausage munchers go

(click to embiggen) 

Mark attempts to stave off the advancing Prussians, just as the game is coming to a close

(click to embiggen)  

So, there you have it.  The game ended after a sort of happy blur - to be honest, I think the only thing that could have made it better was if I had been able to get a little bit more sleep the night before. I'm totally smitten with the idea of garden wargaming now.  It was really interesting to see how the change in the nature of space totally transformed the game. Now Mrs. Kinch runs to a (though I say so myself) very fine flower garden, but there is no lawn to be had. 

Another aspect that complete transformed the game, which has been totally absent from our indoor Little Wars games has been the dips and rises in the ground. No lawn however well tended is entirely flat and it was very surprising to see troops disappear from sight, once one got down to fire ones cannon from the models eye view, into dead ground that was totally invisible when viewed from the lofty height of a 5'10. 

The game was wonderful.  The company was wonderful. The spectacle was probably never to be repeated. I cannot say enough good things about the experience. 

However, it has left me nursing imperial ambitions regarding nearby lawns and muttering greedily about yardsticks and movement trays.  

I think Little Wars will have to ride again. 

(1) Reports that a wargaming Englishman was removed from a Tescos somewhere in the midlands last Thursday after repeatedly screaming "FORWARDS MY CHILDREN! DEATH TO THE FRENCH!" at the dairy counter are unconfirmed and no doubt scurrilous.