Behold the majesty that is Hector the horny robot. Sure, there's no robo-penis visible, but there's probably an optional attachment, right? He runs on fetus brains programmed by a horny and homicidal Harvey Keitel, so what could possibly go wrong? Maybe nothing as long as there aren't any attractive young women around. Oh damn, is that Farrah Fawcett? Well, at least she's not alone in this remote outpost. There's Kirk Douglas, Farrah's lover and only companion on Saturn 3. Douglas looks good for his age, but he's still obviously old enough for retirement. Will Kirk and Farrah fall prey to Harvey and his randy eight foot tall science project? Take another look at Hector, and place your bets.
Saturn 3 (1980) is a peculiar British production meant to capitalize on the then surging popularity of sci-fi at the box office. It's not great, but it's pretty damn entertaining.
Saturn 3 was supposed to be the directorial debut of John Barry, the Oscar winning production designer of
Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope (1977). He had a falling out with star Kirk Douglas during filming, after which he was replaced by veteran director Stanley Donen, who was already on board as a producer.
Donen is most widely known as a director of Hollywood musicals such as
Singing In The Rain (1952) and
Seven Brides For Seven Brothers (1954) - fine movies, to be sure, but
Saturn 3 is notably lacking in production numbers. Shortly thereafter the movie's budget was cut when producer ITC Entertainment went over-schedule and over-budget on
Raise The Titanic (1980), which ultimately proved even less financially successful than
Saturn 3. All things considered,
Saturn 3 turned out pretty good.
While researching this post, I came across
Something Is Wrong On Saturn 3, a fantastic site detailing the turbulent production history of
Saturn 3 written by Gregory Moss. Mr. Moss also contributed the commentary to the Blu-ray release of
Saturn 3, so he knows his stuff. He tells the tale far better than I could. Check it out, if only so you'll know why all of Harvey Keitel's dialog is dubbed - or how British novelist Martin Amis came to write the screenplay - or most importantly, why that snazzy uber-futuristic outfit Farrah is sporting at left didn't make the film's final US theatrical cut. It's interesting reading, and it's sure to pique your interest in
Saturn 3 before Movies At Dog Farm III commences.
Really, though, I had you at "horny robot", right?