Showing posts with label The National. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The National. Show all posts

Sunday, 30 June 2024

Snapshots #350: A Shades Of Red Top Ten Songs

Yesterday's quiz was hosted by Will Ferrell, aka anchorman Ron Burgundy. Today, it's Scarlet O'Hara's turn at the viewfinder. 

I hope you have your Dulux colour charts at the red-dy...


10. Hattie Nolan meets Hot Nathaniel. Both end up confused.

"Hattie Nolan" and "Hot Nathaniel" were both anagrams...

The National - Cardinal Song

9. But there's only three of them!

I bet Ben Folds got sick of that remark, but he only had himself to blame...

Ben Folds Five - Brick

8. Colourfully ascending semitones.

Chromatic refers to both colour and a scale that goes up (or down) in semitones...

The Chromatics - Cherry

7. Plane taken by Fresh Prince.

Will Smith on an aeroplane...

Aerosmith - Pink

Still one of the most disturbing pop videos I've ever seen.

6. Made up for battle.

Warpaint - Burgundy

5. Yogi Beard is a Boo Boo.

"Yogi Beard" was an anagram...

Dobie Gray - Rose

4. Vicar found on tiny planet.

Mercury Rev - Vermillion

3. It all starts with the Taxman.

The first track on Revolver, by the Beatles, is Taxman.

Revolver - Crimson

2. Fasten your seatbelts, it's going to be a bumpy night!

The clue is a quote from the Bette Davis movie...

All About Eve - Scarlet

1. Wilhelm at the helm.

Kaiser Wilhelm was the Chief...

The Kaiser Chiefs - Ruby

Reddy for more Snapshots? Crimson back here next Saturday morning...


Wednesday, 6 March 2024

Self Help For Cynics #25: Marvin



Back when I worked in radio advertising, we spent a huge part of our day playing competitive Hearts on the office computers. It's a four player game so we rotated who was playing - sometimes the sales team would join us too, but there was always enough people for a game, multiple games, throughout the day. Everyone who played had a nickname. There was Stretch and Stig, Hammer and Rabbit, Herbie and Smudge... and Marvin. 

Guess who was Marvin?


Life... don't talk to me about life!

(Marvin made a single once. It was a double B side. Nobody liked it much, but then, they wouldn't, would they?)


Anyway, last week, you may recall, we established that I am paranoid, just like Marvin. Hopefully it's just common or garden paranoia, not one of the fancy kinds that needs specialist treatment, but frankly I've lived with it all my life, and I'm getting a wee bit sick of it. So is there anything I can do?


Mind, as always, has some useful advice to offer...

1. Keep A Diary

Well, I do that, don't I? It's this blog. People ask why I spend so long writing these posts... well, there's your answer. And it does help. Particularly the Self Help For Cynics series. Since I started that, I have been able to understand and cope with the things going on in my head much better than I was doing before.


2. Question & Challenge Paranoid Thoughts

Once again, we're back to arguing with the voice in our head. We've talked about this a number of times previously, particularly in the post on Defusion. As soon as we start questioning negative thoughts, it allows us to see them for what they are: just thoughts. Which are really just neurons sparking and chemicals washing around in our noggins. They're not real.


Here's a sampling of the questions Mind suggests we consider...

Would other people think my suspicions are realistic?

Have I talked to other people about my worries?

Is it possible I have exaggerated the threat?

Is there any evidence for my suspicions that can't be questioned?

Are my worries based on events that could be viewed in different ways?

Are my worries based on my feelings rather than definite evidence?

Is it likely that I would be singled out above everyone else?

Is there any evidence against my beliefs?

Do I still feel suspicious even though other people have reassured me that there is no reason to be?

It might feel like you're interrogating yourself if you run through all those... but then, what is an interrogation if not a gradual chipping away at an individual version of events in order to establish the truth?


3. Look For Support Around You

Once again, isn't this why we blog? Well, it's another of the reasons I'm sat here doing this on a Sunday night. However, there is a part of me - the PARANOID part - that worries these posts might be interpreted as the work of a crass attention-seeker. I suppose when you write a blog, you are an attention-seeker, because you want people to read it... and comment occasionally. But whenever I receive a kind or supportive comment as a result of writing a post like this, it does make me feel guilty. 


I mean, really Rol, you can't win, can you? People are trying to make you feel better - and they actually make you feel worse! Well, maybe not worse. I do appreciate the positive affirmation... it means a lot. But there's still that intrusive voice saying, "What a cry baby! Are you really so weak an insecure that you need to beg people to say nice things to you? Emotionally blackmail them into doing so? You oughta be ashamed of yourself...!"


4. Learn To Relax

The two things that help me relax more than anything else?

Writing and listening to music.

Hey presto! 


5. Look After Yourself

i) Try to get enough sleep.

I do better than a lot of people in this regard. But there's no such thing as "enough sleep" when you have a job, a child and a house...

ii) Think about your diet.

Not as much as some people do, but I've cut down on sugar and I'm eating more nuts, fruit and beetroot...

iii)  Try to keep active.

Not as much as I'd like to, but I'm getting out walking two or three times a week at the moment... and I've taken to running up the stairs at work, to get my heart rate elevated.

iv) Spend time in nature.

See above.

v) Try doing something creative.

This is creative, isn't it? At a stretch...

I may be paranoid, 
But not an android


Thursday, 15 February 2024

Mid-Life Crisis Songs #107: Middle Age Crazy


After writing over a hundred posts dealing with what we laughingly call the "Mid-Life Crisis", it occurred to me that at no point have I addressed the clichés of the male mid-life crisis - specifically getting yourself a sports car (and a hairpiece) and dressing in an unfashionably fashionable style to enable you to chase younger women. Or, as Jerry Lee put it...

Today he traded his big 98 Oldsmobile
He got a heck of a deal
On a new Porsche car
He ain't wearing his usual grey business suit
He's got jeans and high boots
With an embroidered star

An' today he's forty years old going on twenty
Don't look for the grey in his hair
'Cause he ain't got any
He's got a young thing beside him
That just melts in his hand

He's middle aged crazy
Trying to prove he still can
He's gotta a woman he's loved for a long long time at home

Ah but the thrill is all gone
When they cut down the lights
They've got a business that they spent a while coming by
Been a long uphill climb
But now the profits are high

But today he's forty years old going on twenty
And he hears of sordid affairs and he ain't had any
And the young thing beside him
You know she understands
That he's middle aged crazy
Trying to prove he still can


Where do I begin?

Would I ever want to own a Porsche or any other expensive, high-powered automobile?

No. I'm not interested in driving faster than everybody else on the road or in collecting the associated speeding tickets. I don't want to become a target for car thieves or boyracers who fancy a challenge. And I've never liked the idea of drawing attention to myself. See also personalised registration plates. 


Am I about to start dressing ostentatiously in clothes that are far too young for me?

No. Although I will continue to buy T-shirts with obscure movie, TV and music references on them that will only be understood by about 1% of the people I meet. Despite what Mark Radcliffe believes, that men over a certain age should only wear plain T-shirts. That's just dull, Mark. Maybe I'll even get one of these, to celebrate the detente...


As to the greying hair... it's distinguished, right? I like that it starts at the sideburns, like Reed Richards. Just For Men will not be required...


As to the idea of chasing after younger women... besides the fact that Louise would kill me, after chopping up various parts of my anatomy for dog food... I'm sorry, why would I want to be with someone who constantly reminded me of how old and knackered I am? At least when you're with someone your own age, you can be old and knackered together.


With all that in mind, I think I'll pass on the clichés of the male mid-life crisis, after noting with some chagrin the final verse of Jerry's ode in which he identifies the star of his story as being "forty years old going on twenty"... ah, to be forty again!


Let's close with a song that perfectly encapsulates the dangers of succumbing to the MMLC, from a band many of you won't like because they're funny. Humour plus music? How dare they? The debut album from Wolves of Glendale is out now...

It's a Sunday on the strip
My divorced ass moved to Vegas
My wife left and took the kids
And it’s a good thing that she did
'Cuz they were annoying as shit



Wednesday, 15 March 2023

Memory Mixtape #22: Geese


Looking through old Truprint envelopes the other day, I came across two snapshots of my sister's geese. She had these two about 35 years ago, and they were vicious brutes. Worse than any guard dogs - in fact, all the dogs would steer well clear of them. Especially when they put their heads down, as in the photo above... that meant they were going in for the attack. 

Sometimes I'd be given the job of herding them back into their hut on a night time, which is probably when I took these photos. They would go, if you stood your ground, but it was best to go armed with a stick for defense in case they turned on you. They liked a good ruck. 


They weren't the worst geese I ever encountered though. There were a couple on a neighbouring farm that were even more savage. One day, I went with my dad to fetch a couple of cows back from a field he'd been renting near that farm. Dad gave me the job of leading a particularly flighty young calf back with a rope round its neck to stop it running away. I was basically walking the calf like a dog on a lead. Until we passed the open farmyard where the diabolical geese lived. They came out charging, hissing, wings up, terrifying the little calf, which set off at full pelt down the lane... dragging me behind it like a stuntman in a Western. When the calf finally stopped, I was covered in cuts and grazes... but at least the geese hadn't got me.

Here are some geese songs...







Thursday, 25 August 2022

Positive Songs For Negative Times #75: The Wasps!

This was the summer of the wasps.

On the first day of the summer holidays, Sam and one of his school friends were building a den in some bushes next to the local playing field while their two dads chatted in the sunshine. Suddenly the boys ran screaming from the bushes, chased by wasps. Both were stung repeatedly. For the rest of the summer, Sam has gone full Tasmanian Devil at the first sign of a wasp... which has been something of a pain while on holiday, because there are more wasps than ever this year. "Britain" is "under attack from 'drunk' German wasps that 'go nuts' and sting for no reason," says The Daily Star, so it must be true. Always nice for a national newspaper to find a way to stir up racist sentiment even in a story about wasps. Stan Boardman would be proud.

Wherever they came from, there's no doubt that the wasps are in abundance right now, and they're out for blood. I was stung myself last week while visiting a nature reserve. First wasp sting in 45 years: on holiday as a young boy, I picked up a fallen apple from in an orchard and took a bite... only to find a wasp hiding inside...

Wasps often get bad press, though scientists argue they bring important ecological benefits. But frankly, I've grown bloody sick of being surrounded by them whenever I open my sandwiches this summer. Buzz, quite literally, off!

Who better to play today than Sting?

Here are a few answers to that question...

The Candle Thieves - Catching Wasps

Sufjan Stevens - The Predatory Wasp of the Palisades Is out to Get Us!

The National - Wasp Nest

The Black Crowes - Sting Me




Sunday, 19 December 2021

Snapshots #220: A Twelve Days Of Christmas Top... erm, Twelve

Here's a member of the Partridge Family. Yesterday, we had Steve Coogan, aka Alan Partridge. I couldn't find a song with Partridge in the title, which almost derailed this quiz. And then I settled on the perfect solution...


12. Alias Harry & Jones.

Harry Lillis "Bing" Crosby Jr. and David Robert Jones.

David Bowie & Bing Crosby - Little Drummer Boy

Twelve drummers drumming...

11. Hayley's boy in Leningrad, as was (mostly).

Hayley's boy was Crispian Mills, the lead singer of Kula Shaker.

Leningrad is now known as St Petersburg.

Crispian St Peters - The Pied Piper

Eleven pipers piping...

10. This would be a royal scandal!

Imagine if Prince George was Harry's son!?!

George Harrison - My Sweet Lord

Check out the new video above, starring Mark Hammill, John Hamm and Weird Al Yankovich, among others. A lot of money was spent on it. I have no idea why.

Ten lords a'leaping...

9. No kilts.

Anagram!

KT Oslin - 80s Ladies

Nine ladies dancing...

8. Bernard Shakey.

When he directs movies, Bernard Shakey is the pseudonym he uses. Honestly. Google it!

Neil Young - A Man Needs A Maid

Eight maids a'milking...

7. Maiden on the Prosecco.

Iron Maiden and some fizzy wine.

Iron & Wine - Swans & The Swimming

Seven swans a'swimming...

6. Express, Trust, Park.


The National Express. The National Trust. The National Park.


Six geese a'laying...

5. This is your one main sin.

"One main sin" is an anagram.

Nina Simone - Plain Gold Ring

Five gold rings!

4. Candymen (and women).

Shame on you if you didn't get this one.

(Or maybe shame on you if you did?)

Sweet People - And The Birds Were Singing (Et les oiseaux chantaient)

Can you believe that that got to Number 4 in the charts? In 1980!?

Four calling birds...

3. Shout a Smurf!

Anagram!

Rufus Thomas - The Funky Chicken

Three French hens...

(I think the French are quite funky. Don't you?)

2. Nothing to be scared of.

"Ridicule is nothing to be scared of," sang Adam, in Prince Charming.

Which gives me the opportunity to slip this in...


Anyway. Where was I?

Prince - When Doves Cry

(That wasn't actually a picture of Prince. But it was a Prince Christmas tree bauble. You can buy them on eBay. Or you might prefer to save your money.)

Two turtle doves...

1. Number One.

And because I couldn't find a song with a partridge in the title, I settled instead for this gentleman.

Andy Partridge.

Andy Partridge in a pear tree.

Here's a seasonal song from the man in question.


And, to close, the very best version of The Twelve Days of Christmas, from Father Jack himself, Frank Kelly...


Saturday Snapshots will return.

Just not next Saturday...


Tuesday, 19 January 2021

2020 Latecomers: Taylor Swift


I have a lot of time for Taylor Swift, but it's fair to say that when she stepped away from her country roots a few years back to become one of the biggest pop stars in the world, I wished her well and said bon voyage. She's made some great pop songs since then - arguably some of the best of her generation - but as I'm way beyond that generation, I felt like I couldn't really be a part of her crowd anymore.

Last year, she surprised everyone by hooking up with Bon Iver and members of The National (among others) to release two "back to her roots" albums of stripped back country storytelling, Folklore and Evermore. I'm not going to add much to the swathes of column inches devoted to those records other than to say I like them.

A lot.

Sunday, 5 April 2020

Saturday Snapshots #130 - The Answers


After Kurt yesterday, it made sense to feature Goldie today. That's Private Benjamin to you.

Answers, please...


10. Christ, Tom! I'm in a contemporary place.


Jesus, Tom Jones! Contemporary = right now, the place I'm in is right here.

Jesus Jones - Right Here, Right Now

9. Euthanasia request for seven, all across the country.


#7... see below. (Congratulations to new player, Iain, for getting the song right.)

All across the country is national.

The National - Murder Me, Rachael

Maybe not their best-known tune, but it's always been my favourite.

8. Frankie's pal gets caught in a storm and winds up bashing his head open in the rapids.


Frankie & Johnny + Hurricane = Red River Rocks.

Johnny & The Hurricanes - Red River Rock

7. Candy girl wants you to move in.


Rachel Sweet - Baby, Let's Play House

6. Head of Bangkok reads frank diary while singing to a boy.


Murray Head sang One Night In Bankok.

Anne Frank kept a diary.

Danny Boy is the song.

Anne Murray - Danny's Song

That is aural perfection.

5. Marvin's singing grapes escape.


The Vines - Get Free

4. The best part of a chicken climbs to the top.


"The term supreme. used in cooking, refers to the best part of the food."

That's post-Diana Ross.

The Supremes - Up The Ladder To The Roof

3. Jenny Agutter is a delight.


Jenny Agutter was one of the Railway Children.

The Railway Children - A Pleasure

2. It's been a long time since... I felt like things were normal and as they should be.


It's been a long time since I rock 'n' rolled, sang Led Zep.

Things being normal is the status quo... or it used to be, anyway.

Status Quo - Rock 'n' Roll

1. Trendy Hendrix musings about Washington.


"Trendy Hendrix musings" is an anagram.

Geno Washington.




Back again next week, as good as Goldie... hopefully.



Wednesday, 6 November 2019

2019 Contenders: Hard To Lose


I find it very difficult to explain why I like The National as they don't fall into any of the easy to define categories that characterise most of my musical interests these days. They don't write story songs; their lyrics are obscure, at times frustratingly so, but occasionally spring surprising images or ideas on the listener that stick in your head like hooks. But there's nothing I particularly relate to or laugh at or even sing along to in Matt Berninger's lyrics, and normally songwriters like that (of whom there are a growing number these days) get short shrift from me.

Musically they're not an obvious choice for me either. They're not country or indie or singer-songwritery soft rock... which, you know, Mid-Life Musical Crisis should be the name of this blog these days. I'm not really sure how to define the band, but there is something quite contemporary in the production which would hold little appeal if it came from other artists.

One thing I can pinpoint is that I do like Berninger's voice, even when I don't know what the hell he's on about. Although, here comes another potential fly in the ointment: that voice gets rather sidelined on The National's latest album as Berninger welcomes on board a raft of female guest vocalists, including Sharon Van Etten and Kate Stables from This Is The Kit.

All that said, I've been listening to I Am Easy To Find for a good few months now, on and off, and I've yet to grow tired of it. It kind of washes over me, and I've come to realise that lyrically, Berninger belongs to the same school as Bowie... or Michael Stipe. That's most obvious on my favourite track (one which is crammed full of those frustrating lyrical hooks... and curiously even namechecks R.E.M.). The album version isn't available on youtube for some reason, but this is a pretty decent live take...



Tuesday, 3 April 2018

The Hot 100 Countdown #90


I gave up trying to explain why I was never a Gerry Anderson fan years ago (even as a young boy, I couldn't suspend my disbelief that they were just puppets) because too often I saw the tears or rage or regret welling up in the eyes of those for whom Anderson was a god. I get that: if someone tries to tell me why they never liked Spider-Man, I'd probably react in the same way.

I'm not sure I can get my head around your love for the Joe 90 theme tune either. Other Anderson shows had far better tunes, surely? Thunderbirds? Stingray? Even Captain Scarlet's "This is the voice of the Mysterons" - that still manages to send a chill down my spine, even though the show itself left me cold.

Anyway, here it is, to keep you all happy...

Barry Gray - Joe 90 Theme Tune

One thing I do like is that back then, TV shows had proper intros. That's 3 and half minutes before the show even starts! No way would that be allowed in today's attention-span-deficit TV culture. I miss that slower pace.

Charity Chic also pointed out that there's a band called Joe 90, and they're not completely objectionable either.

Anyway, Number 90. So many to choose from, I thought I'd put together a Top Ten...


10. British India - 90 Ways To Lose Your Lover

What the cool kids are listening to these days. (Well, the ones who still dig guitars.)

Great title though!

9. Wolf Alice - 90 Mile Beach

Ditto the above.

Is that an echo?

(Echo... beach... please yourself.)

8. Gwen McRae - 90% of Me is You

Sleazy 70s soul. Dunno how this ended up in my collection (though I have my suspicions) but it does the trick.

7.5. Travis - Tied To The 90s

Moxy Früvous - Stuck In The 90s

Carter USM - The 90s Revival

I'll just sneak these in here and see if anyone notices. 90s songs don't really count, I suppose. Thanks to Rigid Digit for also suggesting...

Robbie Williams - The 90s Song

(Not heard that before, but it reminded me why I always liked Robbie.)

7. Hank Snow - Ninety Miles An Hour (Down A Dead End Street)

The Swede and Lynchie both suggested this. I was only familiar with the Dylan cover, but the original is definitely better.

6. John Cooper-Clarke - Ninety Degrees In My Shades

Another suggestion from The Swede. JCC always welcome round here.

5. Craig Finn - Ninety Bucks

Nobody suggested this, but I didn't really expect anyone to. It's lonely at the Craig Finn fanclub meetings.

4. Danny Woods - 90 Days In The County Jail

Irresistible!

4. The National - 90 Mile Water Wall

Great stuff from Sad Songs For Dirty Lovers.

2. George Michael - Freedom 90.

Martin started the bidding with a very strong contender, Taking the title from one of Wham!'s greatest hits and updating it to show what Freedom meant to him now that he was a solo artist, this is an excellent demonstration of the way George matured as a songwriter. Yes, it's a year song, but the 90 meant much more than just "this is when I'm releasing this track".

1. Bow Wow Wow - C30 C60 C90 Go!

Congratulations to C for stealing the points for this one. And no, this won't pop up again at Numbers 60 and 30, because the rule book says no song can appear more than once... and because C90 was by far my cassette of choice. The mix-tape maker's dream!




Which brings us to 89. I think there's pretty much only one choice, but your suggestions are welcome...

Tuesday, 5 December 2017

My Top 17 Albums of 2017... #16



16. The National - Sleep Well, Beast

Matt Berninger's intriguing imagery and sly wit wins out against flat, contemporary over-production*. Storytelling saves the day.


(*A similar issue sank this year's Elbow album for me: a band I've loved since the start, striving too hard to cut out the guitars and garner radio play by smothering their sound in a Coldplay-like sheen. Or maybe I'm just getting old.**)

(**Indexes and parentheses are a cool way of cheating my self-imposed 17 word limit, aren't they?)


I get a little punchy with the vodka
Just like my great uncle Valentine Jester did
But he had to deal with those people like you
Who made no goddamn common sense
I’d rather walk all the way home right now
Than to spend one more second in this place
I’m exactly like you Valentine,
Just come outside and leave with me


.

Next: 30 is the new mid-life crisis.

Saturday, 18 June 2016

My Top Ten Record Collection Songs


This week's post is dedicated to all regular readers of this blog, and to music bloggers everywhere. I thank you for your time and your patronage. And I want you to know: I share your pain.

I guess it looks as if you're reorganizing your records. What is this though? Chronological?

No...

Not alphabetical...

Nope...

What?

Autobiographical.

No fucking way!

10. Kevin Devine - Guys With Record Collections

Geeky acoustic whimsy from this Devine New York singer songwriter's 2006 album Circle Gets The Square; it sets the tone quite nicely for this week's list...
So I'm starting up a Boys' Club
For guys with record collections
And the girls they hurt to get them...
Shame there's only a lo fi live version on youtube, the studio recording is much better.

9.  Rod Stewart & The Temptations - The Motown Song

Here's one that will sort the Men from the Musos. Originally by Larry John McNally - his version is slightly more cred, but a lot less of a guilty pleasure - Rod pops it up with the Temptations on backing vocals and manages to create the best record of his post-70s heyday. Being pretty creaky myself, I always think of this as a pretty recent entry in the newly knighted Sir Rodney's discography, although it's now 25 years old. According to iffypedia, however, it did at the time mark his 30th year in the music biz since he first auditioned (for Joe Meek - who wasn't particularly impressed!) back in 1961. 
Bring over your old Motown records
Put the speakers in the window and we'll go
On the roof and listen to the Miracles
Echo through the alley down below...
If anyone ever asks you what the early 90s looked liked: show them this video.

8. The National - Looking For Astronauts

If you're an avid record collector, Matt Berninger has some advice that will chill you to the bone...
Throw from your window your record collection
They all run together and never make sense, but that's how we like it, and that's all we want
Something to cry for and something to hunt
7. Marah - Why Independent Record Stores Fail

An amusing story told from the perspective of a guy who works in a record store, doting over the pretty city girl who's running her bony fingers through his 45s...
I ain't too good at saying things
But I could tape you certain songs...
A shame young men don't woo this way anymore. Not that it was ever a great success for me, but I enjoyed giving it a shot.

Ironically, this was released as a vinyl-only b-side for Record Store Day.

6. Todd Snider - Vinyl Records

Todd Snider has a very big record collection - and he takes it everywhere with him. Even on a plane. (Can someone please buy him an mp3 player?)
I got all of Booker T's, Tom T. Hall's
Bobby Bare, Belafonte and the New York Dolls
Billy Joe, Jimmy Croce, Kiss, Crosby Stills and Nash
John, June and Roseanne Cash
I got Forbert, Fromholtz, Stevie Ray
T-Birds, Yardbirds, Sam and Dave
And as some of y'all mighta guessed already
I got piles and piles and piles of...
Tom Petty
5. Corinne Bailey Rae - Put Your Records On

Good to see Ms. Bailey Rae back (at last) with her third album, released just a few weeks ago... and on my list. This is the record that got her noticed in the first place, 10 years ago, and it still sounds fresh and beautiful today.

Plus, she's from Leeds. So extra marks for that.

See also I Put Your Records On by The Pierces, just to prove that it's not just blokes who are obsessed with record collections.

4. Adam & The Ants - Stand & Deliver

What's the Dandy Highwayman doing here? Simple...
The devil take your stereo
And your record collection!
The way you look,
You'll qualify
For next year's old aged pension.
That's you told. Fan-diddly-qua-qua!

3. Eric Church - Record Year

In the holy trinity of contemporary country stars (wherein Blake Shelton is the sparkly eyed pretty boy beloved of the tabloids, Brad Paisley is the honourable family man and class clown, and Eric Church is the dangerous bad boy tamed by a good woman), Church is winning out for me at the moment. I'm sure that'll change as sure as one of the other two brings out a new record, but I'm so enamoured with Mr. Church's last one, Mr. Misunderstood, they're both gonna have to work extra hard to make me put that aside. It's only ten tracks long, but so many great albums know that less is more.
I guess I really oughta call and thank you
I rediscovered Red Headed Stranger
Got down with old James Brown
And found New Grass Revival
If you find your way back, I owe you a beer
For my record year
Record Year has to put up a fight - on most other albums it would be the standout track. Simply put, it's about a guy who gets dumped by a girl... and retreats to his record collection for comfort. What is it John Cusack said at the start of Hi Fidelity...?
What came first, the music or the misery? People worry about kids playing with guns, or watching violent videos, that some sort of culture of violence will take them over. Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands, literally thousands of songs about heartbreak, rejection, pain, misery and loss. Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?
2. Billy Bragg & The Blokes - Tears Of My Tracks

True blues from Billy (the only blue this Righteous Red ever gets) when he's forced to sell his vinyl...
I'm down but I'm not out
Lord, I'm hurting
Somebody owns all my albums now
They probably don't even wonder how
My name got written on the sleeves...
Imagine buying a load of second hand records only to find them all signed by Billy Bragg!

Although the story's a little bit different, this song always reminds me of this classic deleted scene from the aforementioned Hi Fidelity.

1. The Mystery Jets - Greatest Hits

In my Top Ten Divorce Songs a couple of weeks back, Number One with a bullet was Lloyd Cole's Half of Everything, about a couple dividing up their belongings after a break-up. This is the record collection version of that story... see how many great old albums you can identify in The Mystery Jets' finest hour...
You can take The Lexicon of Love away
But I'm keeping Remain in Light
You can take away It's A Shame About Ray
But I'm holding on to Country Life
Well you can keep No Need To Argue and I'll keep The Aeroplane Over The Sea
But hold on to The Boy With The Arab Strap
'Cause I'm holding on to Village Green




Which one makes you go fan-diddly-qua-qua?


Friday, 8 May 2015

My Top Ten Looking For... Songs


Looking for a great old pop song? Here's ten...


10. David Bowie - Looking For Satellites

I remember reading an article years ago about how the Dame had taken to writing songs by snipping up old newspapers and gluing random words together to create his lyrics. I wouldn't believe that for most of his songs...but this one? Damn straight.
Nowhere, Shampoo, TV, Combat, Boyzone
Slim tie, Showdown, Can't stop...
Still, this is surely the most credible song Boyzone ever appeared in.

9. Chris Rea - Looking For The Summer

Very atmospheric tune from the old gravel-gargler. Not sure if this is the official video, but it works very well.

8. The National - Looking for Astronauts
Take all your reasons and take them away to the middle of nowhere, 
And on your way home
Throw from your window your record collection...
Now, if I were to follow The Natonal's advice on this one, I'd be throwing out quite a few of their records too...

7. Philip Jeays - Looking for a Horse to Ride

 If you've never had the pleasure of Philip Jeays before... do yourself a favour and click the link above now.

6. Prefab Sprout - Looking For Atlantis

Rarely a week goes by when I don't feel like a good Paddy. Here he is in his finest white suit, live on Wogan. 
Say you do find your volcano and the darn thing is still hot...
Lesson one : Child don't waste it
Lesson two : The world's your cherry
But tomorrow ? Maybe not
Lesson three : Come on and taste it
Now that's what I call a chat up line!

5. Seafruit - Looking For Sparks

Lost gem from the Britpop era; I'd forgotten how much I liked this. Seafruit's Geoff Barradale is now the manager of the Arctic Monkeys. In case you were wondering.

4. Hue & Cry - Looking For Linda

1989 was in many ways the nadir of 80s pop, but there were faint glimmers of sunshine from the likes of Hue & Cry and their best single, a trainbound love story with an alcoholic runaway who spent more on one packet of cigarettes than was wise, especially in them days.

Iffypedia calls Hue & Cry "sophisti-pop", lumping them in with the likes of Deacon Blue, The Style Council, The Blue Nile and Aztec Camera... yet, curiously, not Lloyd Cole... who's surely more sophistipop than the rest of them rolled together?

3. Warren Zevon - Looking for the Next Best Thing

Appreciating the best but settling for less...Warren Zevon: never content. That's why we love him.
Don Quixote had his windmills
Ponce de Leon took his cruise
Took Sinbad seven voyages
To see that it was all a ruse


(That's why I'm) Looking for the next best thing...
2. Robert Palmer - Looking For Clues

From wayyyy back in 1980 when Batley Bob shared his eyeshadow with Gary Numan. Loved this song for years but never seen the video before... it's a terrifying Kubrickian nightmare. (And discovering amazing oddities like that is why I keep doing this blog.)

1. Tom Waits - (Looking For) The Heart of Saturday Night

The very definition of louche, this drips grubby atmosphere from every glorious note. Tom Waits at his very best.
Tell me, is it the crack of the pool balls, neon buzzing?
Telephone's ringing, it's your second cousin
Is it the barmaid that's smiling from the corner of her eye?
Magic of the melancholy tear in your eye...

Makes it kind of quiver down in the core
Cause you're dreaming of them Saturdays that came before
And now you're stumbling
You're stumbling onto the heart of Saturday night





Those were my favourite Looking For... songs. Were you Looking For... any I didn't include?

Sunday, 15 December 2013

My Top Thirty Albums of 2013 (30 - 21)


I've not had a whole lot of time for blogging lately, for small baby-related reasons (I'm not complaining!) However, I couldn't let the year pass without giving mention to the records that kept me sane throughout 2013. Before we get to the Top 20, here are a few interesting runners up...


30. Adam Ant - Adam Ant Is the BlueBlack Hussar Marrying the Gunner's Daughter

The album title alone gets it through the door. It's good to have him back.

Top Track - Cool Zombie

29. Jake Bugg - Shangri La 

There's no denying Jake Bugg can write both a TUNE and zeitgeisty lyric, and his debut album did crack me after a good few listens. Whether this will do the same, I've yet to see, I only got it a couple of weeks back. However, I did buy another record on the same day that's already made it into my Top 10. Sometimes though, growers are better than immediate sparklers. Only time will tell.

Top Track - Messed Up Kids

28. Noah & The Whale - Heart Of Nowhere

A concept album about a world where teenagers are illegal... or something. Hardly Tommy, and nowhere near as mindblastingly wonderful as their last record... but I do hope its lack of success doesn't put them off.

Top Track - There Will Come A Time

27. Bon Jovi - What About Now

Look, just deal with it, OK?

Top Track - Because We Can

26. Parquet Courts - Light Up Gold

If you want to get picky, this was originally released last year. But it got a big boost this summer by the promotion of its Velvets-meets-Pavement single, Stoned & Starving. If every track on the album had been as strong as that, this might have made my Top 3.

Top Track - Stoned & Starving

25. The Handsome Family - Wilderness

Who knows what goes through Brett & Rennie's minds? On their latest record, each track was named after a woodland critter. The songs were about far more than wildlife though...

Top Track - Woodpecker

24. The National - Trouble Will Find Me

Re-listening to this record in preparation for this countdown, I came to the conclusion I haven't given it enough time. So I've taken it to play in the car. In another couple of weeks, it might be Top 10.

Top Track - Demons  

23. Luke Haines - Rock 'n' Roll Animals

Luke Haines's latest concept album insanity was a children's fable about three rock 'n' roll animals  (Jimmy Pursey, a fox; Gene Vincent, a cat; and a badger called Nick Lowe) who travel up country to battle the evil Angel of the North. Narrated by Julia Davis, naturally.

Top Track - Rock 'n' Roll Animals

22. Johnny Marr - The Messenger

Good to hear Johnny finally deliver the solo album we always knew he was capable of. Shame his former partner is too busy penning Penguin Classics to lend him a few spare lyrics. We can but dream...

Top Track - New Town Velocity

21. The Arctic Monkeys - AM

Alex Turner's Elvis-channeling Glasto performance and the NME's Album of the Year notwithstanding, this was just another year in the life of the Sheffield Monkees. Again, I only picked up their latest album a few weeks back and perhaps with a few more listens it might have crept into my Top 20. But I can tell already it's not up there with their debut or even their last two records. It might be better than Favourite Worst Nightmare... or I might just be being churlish.

Top Track - Number One Party Anthem

And now, because everyone's heard the Arctic Monkeys at some point this year, here's Adam Ant one more time. Because even at #30, he deserves it.




A few surprises there... I know, if some of those only made my Top 30, who the hell made better records this year? You'll have to wait and see.

Start laying your bets for the next ten... or the number one. Any guesses?

Wednesday, 17 April 2013

My Top Ten Fashion Songs


From the least fashionable music blog on the net... a load of elegant, diaphonous, off-the-shoulder sartorial tosh. 

10. Campag Velocet - Bon Chic Bon Genre

Remember Campag Velocet? The NME tried to convince us they were in fashion back in 1999.

They weren't.

9. We Smoke Fags - Passion For Fashion

Gets in on the strength of the band name alone. Much better name than Campag Velocet.

8. Eels - Fashion Awards

E pops down to the fashion show, and if he doesn't win an award for best hair, well...
We'll blow off our heads in despair
7. The Frank & Walters - Fashion Crisis Hits New York

The very definition of "lost classic".
Well, fashion it moves on and on
While the things we've bought
Have been hardly worn
I still like my old three-piece suite but
It's in the shed and I've got no seat
Oh no no
6. Madonna - Vogue

Around this time, Madonna started to believe her own hype. She made some very bad decisions in the 90s and was never the same again. Still, it's a great pop song... so good, Lady Gaga couldn't help but rip it off.

5. The National - Fashion Coat

As with most songs by The National, I don't have clue one what it's about. Good though.

4. Flight of the Conchords - Fashion Is Danger

Bret & Jemaine bring us a (timely) warning about fashion from the 80s...
P-P-P-P-President Reagan
Th-Th-Th-Thatcher
Jazzercise
L-L-L-Lipgloss
3. Suede - She's In Fashion

It's good to have Suede back, and sounding as fashionable as they did when they recorded this.

2. David Bowie - Fashion

Dave takes the piss.
Fashion! Turn to the left
Fashion! Turn to the right
Oooh, fashion!
We are the goon squad and we're coming to town
Beep-beep
Beep-beep
1. The Kinks - Dedicated Follower of Fashion
Eagerly pursuing all the latest fads and trends, 

One week he's in polka-dots, the next week he's in stripes. 

His world is built 'round discoteques and parties. 

In matters of the cloth he is as fickle as can be,

I know, it could almost have been written about me.

Not likely. Still, at least I'm not a dedicated swallower of fascism... as Billy famously paraphrased Ray.



Darling! You look marvelous! What are you wearing?

Tuesday, 12 February 2013

My Top Ten Paranoia Songs


I'm not paranoid. I know you're all out to get me.


10. Garbage - I Think I'm Paranoid

Garbage kind of passed me by during the 90s. Listening back now, I should have paid more attention.

9. The National - Afraid of Everyone 

Matt Berninger has little voices swallowing his soul and can't even defend his family with his orange umbrella. What's worse: he doesn't have the drugs to sort it out. 

8.  Barry Andrews - Win A Night Out With A Well-Known Paranoiac

A lost, twisted classic from the ex-XTC Shriekback man. Makes Kafka seem like Jackanory.

7. Art of Noise featuring Max Headroom - Paranoimia

Children of the 80s - be afraid. Be very afraid. Max Headroom is your future.

6. The Kinks - Paranoia, The Destroyer

Or: What happened when Ray took Lola home.

See also the much earlier Acute Schizophrenia Paranoia Blues.

5. Rockwell - Somebody's Watching Me

Rockwell was Berry Gordy's son. Paranoid music fans claim that this was only ever a hit because Michael Jackson sand the chorus. I claim bollocks: the verses are far more entertaining.
When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid to wash my hair
'Cause I might open my eyes and find someone standing there
People say I'm crazy, just a little touched
But maybe showers remind me of Psycho too much
4. Harvey Danger - Flagpole Sitta
Been around the world and found
That only stupid people are breeding
The cretins cloning and feeding
And I don't even own a TV
You may also recognise this as the theme tune to the appropriately paranoid Peep Show. If you're gonna be a one hit wonder, make it a cracker.

Paranoia, paranoia
Everybody's comin' to get me
Just say you never met me
I'm runnin' underground with the moles
Diggin' holes
Hear the voices in my head
I swear to God it sounds like they're snoring
But if you're bored then you're boring
The agony and the irony, they're killing me, whoa!
3. James - Out To Get You
Insecure? What you gonna do?
I've seen James perform this live a number of times. Never fails to raise the hair on the back of my neck.

2. Black Sabbath - Paranoid

If you weren't paranoid already, Tony Iommi's relentless riff will do the job. As for why Ozzy's so paranoid... wouldn't you be if you were married to Sharon?

1. Radiohead - Paranoid Android

Having already given this the number one spot in my Top Ten Robot Songs, I thought twice about letting it win this battle as well. But in the end, it's Radiohead's Bohemian Rhapsody. I've have been more paranoid about bumping it down to #2. Plus, it's Thom Yorke taking the piss out of his own image - how often does that happen. Recorded in Jane Seymour's house, named after Marvin (my old nickname) from The Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy, when I am king you will be first against the wall.

What's that?



See also every single record Morrissey has recorded since The Smiths broke up (and quite a few before that). Far too many to narrow it down to just one choice.

But which one is following you home tonight...?
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