Tatch-toos

Clara has been a little fascinated by tattoos lately. She calls them "tatch-toos" and it makes me laugh every time. She decorated Hazel and herself with "tatch-toos" last week.Then she found an old temporary tattoo that we put on yesterday. If you look closely at the tattoo, you'll notice the date of 97-98, my Sophomore year of high school. I can't believe I have had that for 14 years. Why? Clara kept forgetting the word 'fake' and would tell people, "I have a tatch-too. It's real. Wait, Mom, what is it called?" (Me: Fake) "Oh, I mean it's fake."

Ordinary Days

It's easy to forget what life was like before certain things come our way, i.e. kids. More on that later. But for documentation purpose, here's what my day was like today. It was both typical and ideal, maybe a little more relaxing than most days... (and probably incredibly boring to anyone, but I want to have something to help me remember years from now when I think about this phase of my life)

Wake up 7:16am (thank you, Clara)

Lay in bed until Hazel wakes up at 7:55am

Feed Hazel

Make/eat breakfast with Clara

Put Hazel down for nap

Check e-mail

Clean up kitchen and do dishes, water garden, Clara and I get showered and dressed

Feed Hazel

Drop Hazel off at my mom's so Clara and I can go to the dentist

Swap Hazel for Clara (at Clara's request) and go have lunch with friends

Go back to my mom's to feed Hazel, visit and play with her baby chicks (cute!)
Come home, put Hazel down for a nap

Clara and I paint (with one of those paint spinners - I had one when I was little and it was pretty much my favorite thing ever. It took lots of self control to let Clara play with it.)

Quiet time and I almost fall asleep (up too late folding laundry last night)

5:36pm - Change dinner plans to something quicker, easier and maybe more healthy

Make dinner - chicken sausage, carrot sticks, homemade french fries and cherub tomatoes

Feed Hazel

Eat dinner

Bathe Hazel

Hazel and I watch Jason set up sprinklers for our garden, Clara mixes mud in a bucket and calls it poison

Put Hazel to bed (swaddle, pacifier, song, crib)

Put Clara to bed (teeth, prayers, scriptures, songs, lay with her)

Scriptures/prayers

Work

Blog

Clara wakes up, hug her and talk to her to try to figure out what's going on with her awful sleeping habits, put her back to bed

Should be in bed by 11:15pm - that's a little on the early side

Butterball

At the ripe old age of 3 months, Hazel can sit up.And stand.

Just kidding. She does want to sit up, although I'm not holding my breath. Clara was well into her eighth month before she got serious about sitting. But when Hazel is in her car seat, she holds her head up/forward and looks like she's doing a sit up trying to sit up. It's funny.

She also has levitating legs. She lets them hover a few inches off the ground for much of the time she's laying down

Hazel is such a good baby. I mean it. Every now and then she wakes up in the night, but it's rare (twice in the last month?). (She has done it three times since I started this post... three days ago. Guess who forgot to knock on wood?) So usually, even when she wakes up, she just needs her pacifier and/or to be swaddled, then drifts right back to sleep. When she is upset, which is often because she wants to be held, has a wet diaper or is tired, she screams. I'm not sure how else to describe it as it's not a cry. It's not continuous, she just yelps and screams. Kind of funny, kind of annoying. She giggles and smiles lots. It's fun. She falls asleep pretty easily, which is nice since we are out and about a lot. I'm not sure I could have done that with Clara. Hazel hates tummy time (do any babies like it?). Around 2 months old, I put her on her tummy and she pushed herself over to her back. Clara started that pretty young too. Having a little more meat on her bones than Clara, I'm thinking Hazel will wait longer before she's able to do this consistently.

As Clara grew, I was totally okay with it. Every stage was fully enjoyed. Not having the same amount of time to give to Hazel, I feel like every stage is quickly slipping through my grip. Part of me wonders if it's because she is growing so fast. Last Sunday we pulled out the 3-6 month clothes and some of those are not going to last more than a few weeks. She does remind me to slow down and enjoy life. If I'm working on my computer with her by my side, sometimes I tell myself I can hold her later or I'll hold her more tomorrow. But then the better part of me decides I can also her her right then and lose a little more sleep. Because I'll never get these moments back and they are going by too quickly not to take more time to enjoy them.

PS I drafted the following about time flying when Hazel was 2 months old. Another month just flew by before I could finish up and post them...

Somehow, children make time fly. I've also heard it goes faster with each additional child. I totally believe it and I think I have figured out why.

When Clara was born, I sat on my couch holding her and watching Punk'd while she slept for the first 3 months of her life. She had all my time. Obviously when Hazel was born, I didn't have that luxury. Instead of her getting 100% of my attention, it seems like she's getting 50%. So while 2 months can pass by, it may seem like only a month based on the amount of time I spent with her. There's twice as much going on and the faster I run, the faster time flies. Does that make sense to anyone besides me?

Just like that, 2 months has come and gone. That means there is only 10 months until a year. And based on how the first 2 months ran on by, that will be here in no time at all. It's really kind of making me sad. How's that for drama, I'm sad thinking about being sad when my sweet, chubby little baby is one. Oh, I love this little sweety pie.

Witty Children

They say the funniest things.

-----

Look! This is my favorite quarter.

Really?

Yeah. I'll sell it to you for 90 cents.

-----

I want to be a toot for Halloween.

What?

A toot. You know, the air that comes out of your bum.

-----

They even snuggle up close to you and say, Mom, the reason I don't really ever eat very much of my food is because everything you cook is kind of yucky.

-----

They have the greatest imaginations.

Some people might think this is a sun visor with a mirror. To Clara, it's a TV and she's watching a movie. Peter Pan, to be exact. (Who needs fancy things when you have an imagination?)

This might look like an apron, but to Clara, it's her long-awaited cape. (The one I bought fabric to make about a year ago and still haven't made. Who needs an organized mom when you have an imagination?)

Sometimes they say things you want to laugh at but you have to deal with it maturely.

Such as when you're at a client's house and they come tell you they had a "soft toot". (Even more exciting when you've been eating beets. No need to expound.) Or when you're at the same client's house, as only 10 minutes has elapsed since the previously mentioned incident, and they come to you with a wet and dirty shirt. They proceed to tell you they are wet from catching and holding said client's daughter's pet fish. (Good thing they are friends and laid back.)

They think they are sooo funny (and they are).

Although sometimes, you nearly bite through your lip trying not to scream at them.

Clara, take care of these stuffed animals.

No.

Don't say no to me.

Cheap.

Say, Yes, mom.

Cheap cheap.

Answer me.

But we're a family of birds and I'm the baby bird.

Okay, say Yes, mom.

Cheap cheap.

Just take care of your animals.

Cheap.

And sometimes you just scream.

A Lesson on Blossoms

Best smelling blossoms (navel)Most beautiful blossoms (ornamental plum)
Messiest blossoms (Anyone else have NO clue that pine trees have the nastiest yellow pollen? It is all over my front walk way, front porch and front door.)
See?

Happy Spring!

Silent and not-so-silent letters

In case you're wondering, The Home Depot on Power and McKellips does not have any avocado trees. But they do have some in the HERbs. (As in her-bs.)

Huh? (Oh, did you have the same reaction as I?)

Yeah, I think there are some avocado herbs over there. At least that's what they say.

Shortly after during family scriptures, Jason read in 2 Nephi 21:8, which quotes Isaiah 11:8. Clara wanted to know what the "hole of the asp" was. Except apparently she thought the 'p' was silent. Being the mature parents we are, Jason and I waited a whole 15 seconds before laughter burst through our lips. Luckily, she had no clue why we were laughing.

If you haven't laughed yet, how 'bout this picture?

Happy Friday

I loved this past Friday. I just felt happy and at the end of the day, I felt overwhelmed with gratitude for my good life. In the morning, we went hiking with Beka at Usery Pass. She tricked me and said we'd be going on the Merkle trail head and then we attempted the Wind Caves. I've never done that hike. Doing it with a giant baby strapped to my front wasn't all that easy. But we had fun, made it almost halfway up and enjoyed the beautiful weather. Funny things to remember:

- Nursing on the side of the trail. Most people ignored me. One guy said, "Baby's think they need to eat all the time."

- about 15 feet from the END of the trail, Hazel was screaming and Clara fell really hard on her knee. I bent over to help her, holding Hazel who was screaming, and the lens for my sunglasses popped out. Quite a sight.

- After I got the kids buckled up to leave, I realized my trunk was open. I put my purse in it before we left and apparently I never closed it all the way. The only valuable thing in it was my check book (and let's be honest, there's not a whole lot to steal in our account, ha ha), but fortunately no one bothered it.

I think seeing Beka carry Owen in this giant carrier made me feel less tired. :)

Don't worry, I checked often to make sure Hazel was still breathing.
What's cuter, Beka's orange smile or my 7 chins?

After the hike, we went to my mom's to visit. We juiced some oranges and stayed there until bed time. Juicing oranges is therapeutic for me. I don't like picking them, don't really like rinsing and cutting them, but I could juice all day. Especially with good company.

Other things to round out an already good day: a client asking if I could take over some of his responsibilities, watching my dad hold Hazel, a hot bath (I have been sick and achy and hiking didn't help my stiff muscles, so it felt lovely) and a foot and back rub. See? Happy day.

Unusually Festive

I don't normally do fun things for holidays, especially the less significant ones. However, I spent the afternoon deceiving three little girls, filling them with sugar and laughing at their imaginations.Pete the Leprechaun stole their treats* and then left a series of notes to lead them to where he hid them. Then he put green in the middle of the cookies. The nerve.

Originally, I was going to hide the first clue somewhere and have them accidentally find it, and lead them to their eventual treat. That plan was foiled when Clara opened my nightstand drawer this morning when I was half asleep and asked me what the treats were for. I then decided to still hide the treat and leave a note from the leprechaun saying he'd taken their treats and hidden them. When Clara asked for a treat, I told her to go get them and she came back saying they weren't there. She said, "Maybe a leprechaun took them." Up until this point, we didn't have much talk of leprechauns, so that was a little funny. Anyway, I read them the note and it only got better from there. I heard at least 5 times, "It really was the leprechaun. It was a real leprechaun!" I felt so clever. Until Lucy said, "Maybe it was Grandpa Melzer" as we sat in the front grass and they marveled that a little green man played a silly trick on them.

So Long Sweet Citrus

We underestimated how much we would LOVE having navel orange trees covering our backyard. We donated 1200+ pounds, gave/sold at least eighteen 30+ pound boxes, juiced about 300 pounds and ate probably 300 pounds ourselves. We're all a little sad that they are gone, but at least we have the smell of the orange blossoms to tie us over until they are back in the Fall.

Making Memories... Finally

A I looked at pictures of Clara and me before Hazel was born and remembered how much fun we would have, I felt so sad. It seriously seemed like all the fun almost stopped completely once Hazel was born. I would get really depressed thinking about how lame/mean I had become. I was annoyed and frustrated with Clara way too much. After realizing it was mostly because I wasn't spending much quality with Clara when I should have been (during Hazel's naps), I decided I needed to set some limits for myself. I decided that we needed to spend more of Hazel's nap time doing things together, even if it was house work, and also make sure we had some fun activities planned. Last week was a success. Spending less time with my computer during nap time and more time with Clara helped remind me how much I love Clara's spunk. She was more well-behaved, I was more patient and we made some good memories. I realized I can't do it all, especially when I get busy with work. Unfortunately, for the last few months, I've let the wrong ball drop. Last week, that changed.

Exhibit A: Kite flying on Monday (the weather was perfect, which was pure luck since we don't get much wind here)

Exhibit B: Children's Museum of Phoenix with Abby on Tuesday
Exhibit C: Planting seeds for the garden on Wednesday (more on this later)
Exhibit D: Queen Creek Olive Mill for lunch with Angela on Thursday (I've been wanting to go here for the last few years... not the experience I was expecting, although I would return for the food and the olive oil)
Exhibit E: Arizona Museum for Youth with Elsa & Co. on Friday***
For those of you wondering: Yes, Hazel joined in on much of the fun, yes, she's still chunky and yes, she's still cute as can be.
*** Until Friday, I had only been here once a few years ago. I wasn't that impressed, but I still decided to buy an annual membership a few months ago since I figured we could use it a few times in the summer when it's too hot to breathe outside. On Friday we spent the first 30-45 minutes in one half of the museum and I wasn't impressed. If Clara was 2, it would have been okay, but 4, eh, not that great. But then, we meandered over to the other half, the half I'd never been before, and every 5 minutes I gave myself a mental pat on the back for buying a membership. I loved it. More importantly, Clara LOOOOOOVED it. They had so many different art exploration type things and that wasn't even the good part. One of the current exhibits: Once Upon A Time... Fairy Tales, Frogs and Fables is really well done. Especially for 4 year olds. There are several areas to dress up as fairy tale characters, there are activities created around fairy tales, you can join in on the Mad Hatter's Tea Party (they put our un-birthday party to shame) and Cinderella was there. Clara talked about Cinderella for the rest of the day. We would have gone back this week, but because it's Spring Break, I might hold off until next week.

Sweet Memories

We only took a few pictures in the hospital when I had Hazel. I'm still bummed about it. Obviously we didn't have time to take any before she was born and Jason was too tired to take any afterwards. The one we do have of me when Clara came to see Hazel for the first time is an okay picture, except that I look like I'm 12. Looking 12 isn't a bad thing, unless you are sitting in a hospital gown with your 4 year old and newborn on the hospital bed. BUT! When Rachel brought Clara to the hospital, she took a few. I saw them for the first time last week. This is my favorite. Me with my two favorite little people ever. What would I do without them? Peaceful happiness all around.If only I could have got the following conversation on video, shortly after Clara climbed up into my hospital bed:

C: Mom, where are her bottles?

A: They are attached to my body.

C: {Staring at me out of the corner of her eye, head straight forward and not moving... her eyes were about double the normal size}
A: Our b**bs make milk and that's what the baby eats

C: {Still staring at me out of the corner of her eye, her head facing forward, doesn't say a word for a few minutes}

Poor girl. I think I traumatized her. I really should have warned her of that one, especially since all her baby dolls drink from bottles.

I Love to Laugh

My children make me laugh. So often pictures aren't enough. I wish I could record everything. Well, not everything, no need to remember my countless flaws and moments of weakness. But when it comes to the kids, if I could just captures the facial expressions, the voices, everything that a still shot can't preserve. I look forward to the replay button in Heaven. It does exist. Right?

Clara (aka Goose or Turkey):

Blessing our seeds to grow "super sonic speedy fast" and blessing her to be a "super sonic speedy coyote hero".

Asking question after question to the lady reading a book during story time at the Arizona Museum for Youth.

Her excitement for life and for "sprises".

Prancing and skipping around like a little sprite at Jason's softball game in her dress up shoes.

Right in the middle of a discussion about words that rhyme she said: "Stupid sounds like Hazel." Huh?

{Mis-matched socks, faux jean leggings under basketball shorts, dress shoes, painted nose, leftover face painting on cheek from the night before, messy hair and Hazel's beany... I totally let her leave the house looking like this. But not before I told her she looked like an orphan. She asked what an orphan was. I told her it was someone without a mom or dad to help them dress nicely.}

Hazel (aka Munch-caroon {i.e. the best macaroon ever} or chubbalicious {step aside Pinkalicious}):

Staring up at me when she is supposed to be eating/going to sleep with a big grin on her face and talking to me.

The way she lifts both legs up when she is swaddled, so she resembles a mermaid.

Kicking her arms and legs non-stop when she breaks free from her swaddle.

Offering facial expressions that create hours of entertainment.

The way she acts like a ravenous dog when I kiss her cheeks and the thinks it's something else.

I think I kissed her 893 times today.

Princess in a Backpack

As Lilly walked into the room, Clara said, "Here comes the princess in a backpack... Can this be my castle?"

Clara Conducts FHE

We had the best FHE this week we've had in a long time. Not the most spiritual, but the most fun. Fun is important too. I invited Karen over for dinner, but only because I knew she'd do my dishes. (Just kidding Karen.) I made this roasted root vegetable salad. It was so good. SO GOOD! Dinner was part of the hat party Clara demanded, as she handed out hats to everyone. That was followed by a dance party (someone goes in the closet and someone else announces so-and-so is going to come out and dance as if they were announcing the starting line up for a basketball game). Then I let Clara give an impromptu lesson. This entailed Clara flipping to a random lesson in the nursery manual, having someone read the lesson then "teaching" us about that topic.

Lesson #1: I have a body like Heavenly Father

C: {Showing us a picture of a girl} What does this girl have on her? What is on her head? (trying to get us to answer body since we show her pictures and ask questions)

Lesson #2: Jesus Christ Showed Us How to Love Others

C: {Showing us a picture of Christ with little children} What is Jesus doing with the children in this picture?

K: answers

J: answers

A: He said, 'Suffer the children to come unto me.'

C: Yes, they are suffering.

Just before we ended...

C: Dad, say 'I am a child of God.'
J: I am a child of God.

C: And who has sent you here?

(For those that don't know the second line of the song I Am A Child of God is "And He has sent me here")

We laughed, we had fun and we learned that we have a body like our Heavenly Father, Jesus showed us how to love others and we are all children of God.

Random Thoughts

Emotions & Art: I feel my emotions very intensely. Sometimes I wish I had a more artistic way of expressing my emotions so others knew how I was feeling. I wish I could write, sculpt, paint or create something, anything, to express my emotions. While I am good at and enjoy entering formulas into Excel, that doesn't exactly convey to others how I feel. :) I am constantly seeing art or hearing music that expresses so many of the same feelings I experience and I wish I could share my feelings with others in similar fashion. I wish I could create something that moves people the way I am moved by other's talents.

Housekeeping: It's been a busy week. After being up until 3:30am working Wednesday night, I just gave up. My house is a wreck. But now that I have time to clean it, I just want to sit and do nothing. Or make flowers for baby girls. Or post blogs and eat cookies. Or look at my mail from the last week+. Or make my upcoming weekly calendar and menu. Or pretty much anything but clean.

Preschool update: I signed Clara up for preschool. I put way too much thought into it. I prayed about it over and over and realized for this one, it was one of those "do what you think is best" answers. I needed to use my agency and just pick one way or the other. I don't think kids need preschool. Even if they don't get enough academic and social training and exposure prior to Kindergarten, I think they will still do just fine. Initially, I was only willing to pay for something super academic. Yet I hesitated because I didn't want to pay to be tied down and I didn't want to send Clara away sooner than I had to. I was having a conversation with some friends that was pivotal in my thought process. One said her kids still talk about preschool (the same preschool I originally decided against) and the other said she isn't going to pay for someone to teach her kids what she's capable of teaching them. I agreed with her, I don't want to pay for Clara to learn what I could teach her. So I decided to sign Clara up for the preschool that I thought she'd have the best experience instead of the one I thought I had decided on. She'll be learning things, doing things and experiencing things that I could never do with her. As far as the time commitment, I decided it's preschool. Preschool! If I want to leave for a week, who cares if she misses it? In regards to sending her away, it's only a few hours a day for 3 days a week. That will give me time to get work done, clean, run errands and spend one-on-one time with Hazel so that when Clara is home, I can spend more quality time with her. And I took Rachel's wise advice on not letting money be a factor in my decision. :)

Little Hazel: I decided it's funny that we call Hazel "Little Hazel", especially coming from Clara. Instead of looking small next to Clara, she looks like a mini giant. No one tell that sweet little baby that her dad calls her "Hazilla".

Speaking of Hazel: cries with tears now (which makes it extra sad), smacks her lips in the middle of eating, spits up less (even when I eat chocolate), isn't as fussy if she doesn't get her long naps, falls asleep so easily, smiles easily and often, keeps getting chubbier, likes to lay by herself for 10-15 minutes after her diaper is changed, can fall asleep without being swaddled if she's not too tired, likes to talk, loves her car seat, loves the car (as long as it's moving), loves to take baths and sloshes cups and cups of water over the edge as she kicks her legs non-stop during her baths and is our little baby princess (with creepy vampire eyes compliments Clara)

Clara: loves holding Hazel, is still having a hard time at night (I don't know if it's the new house or just a phase that coincidentally started when we moved), speaks like an adult, makes everyone laugh, gets stomachaches when she has to clean up her room (she told me this morning she had the flu, but if she got to watch a movie, it'd make her better), likes to boss people around and is sitting on her bed whispering to herself with her wizard hat on that she occasionally calls her "lizard" hat, thought her "whoopin cushy" was funny and is the big princess of the house (the star was a special request)

Parenting: I've long said the emotional side of parenting will limit the number of children I have far sooner than the physical aspect. In the last few months, I have really been struggling with Clara. I guess I should say I am struggling with myself when it comes to parenting Clara. I've cried in frustration several times because I know she's acting out because she needs more attention from me. While sometimes her behavior is not acceptable, I know a lot of it is probably preventable as it's a reaction to the lack of attention I give her. I have been really busy with work since Hazel was born. So the second Hazel goes down for a nap, I want to have my time to clean, work, veg, etc., when I should really be using this time to spend with Clara. I think we've only done one or two crafts since the baby was born, the number of books we read daily has gone down, we've probably done a total of three puzzles together in the last two months, the only place we've gone for fun is the park and we have only played a game or two a week. My goal is to be more focused on Clara during a few of Hazel's naps, which means I need to have a bit more order and discipline in my life. For me the secret is planning. I can do it.

Temple: I got to go to the temple for the first time Friday since the baby was born. I'm so lucky that my mom lives close to me and the temple, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to go. I love the temple and yearn for the peace that I feel there, especially when it's been so long since I've gone. The first time I went after Clara was born (also in March), we were in California. Emily drove down to the temple with us, I fed Clara in the car and did a session while Emily and her kids watched Clara outside. That meant a lot to me.

Cupcakes: A lady in my Ward taught a cupcake class. I learned some neat tricks and got lots of good recipes. I can't wait to have a reason to make cupcakes so I can go to the store and buy stuff to decorate them. Especially the edible glitter. I put some on one of the cupcakes I decorated and unfortunately, the picture doesn't show how sparkly it was. It was so pretty. Seriously. This cupcake could be titled "Clint's Worst Nightmare". He hates frosting, pink and sparkles.

Lying: I read an article in a Baby magazine about how many new moms lie to their friends, their husbands and their doctors about their new babies. It explained why they do it - so they aren't judged, so their kids appear to be more advanced, etc. I'm glad I am confident enough that I can be honest about my kids. Besides, if you do have an unusually fussy baby, lying about it won't get you the sympathy you deserve. :)

Personalities: In the temple, everyone wears white. Not only is it symbolic for purity, but also that we are all equal in the sight of God. While I was looking around thinking about this, the thought came to me that yes, we are equal, but we still have very different personalities. It was amusing to notice how many women had dresses on that reflected their personalities so well. My dress? Plain, simple and a little on the boring side. Hmmm.

Our Pet's Heads Are Falling Off!

Sometimes things happen that make me want to laugh and scream and then laugh some more, because in a way, it's kind of funny. Really funny, actually. For some reason, when this stuff happens, I think of the line from Dumb and Dumber, "Our pet's heads are falling off!" Which, isn't really funny, but something about it makes me laugh.

Kind of like Clara sleep walking the other night and thinking her stool was the toilet. And having no clue what she did the next morning. At least she pulled her underwear down and at least her stool was on the tile.

Or like when I was on the phone for work and she runs in, not a bit of clothing on, turns around and says, "I need you to check my bum to see if I wiped good enough."

Or when she had her "lizard" hat on (aka WIZARD hat) and tried to sneak off her bed, not realizing I could see about 16" of the 18" hat.

Or when she can't quite understand what the word "smother" means.

But then when she's off playing, at my mom's or with jason and the house is quiet, I realize how dull life would be without her spunky little personality.

Preschool

Help!

I can't make decisions.

I'm totally stressed out about whether or not to put Clara in preschool.

I found one I like, so it's not really deciding which one, it's whether to do it at all. It's expensive and I don't like being tied down. I like to be able to come and go when I please and not have my schedule dictated by something else. That's all going to happen eventually, but why make it start earlier than I need to?

So I need your opinions to help me make a final decision. What should I do? Is it worth it? Would you do it? Why or why not?