The Return of Wingnut Mr. Whoopee

Glenn Beck's Never Trump LARPing act lasted exactly as long as we knew it would.

Glenn Beck says that "American Communists" and George Soros are orchestrating an "assault on the republic" using Central American migrants pic.twitter.com/888mpoAurV

— Jason Campbell (@JasonSCampbell) April 11, 2019

But boy howdy were the Liberal media rubes lined up around the fucking block to hand him all the media spotlight he could soak up when he was feeding them their favorite self-flattering fairy tale of the bad man who has seen the error of his ways and come into the Liberal light.

Glenn Beck: Canary in the Never Trump Mineshaft

Stop being chumps, people.

Behold, a Tip Jar!

Noted Arsonist Calls For "Fireman Appreciation Day"

"We are vastly 2 different countries" https://t.co/w8iA3N4WlM

— Brian Stelter (@brianstelter) February 26, 2018

Film at 11 for no explicable reason.

Dread and Circuses

As the Fox News chickens come home to roost...and peck the fuck out of each other.

Apparently, when this clown...



... calls this clown...

... a "clown",  it is noteworthy (from The Hill):

Glenn Beck: 'Grow up, Donald Trump'

Radio host Glenn Beck slammed GOP presidential candidate Donald Trump on Thursday, saying he is more concerned about the Iran nuclear deal than the businessman’s “third-grade politics.”

“I’m telling you, dealing with Donald Trump is like dealing with a third grader,” the conservative media personality said on his Thursday broadcast.

“And I’m not dealing with a third grader anymore because the world is on fire,” Beck said. “Enough of the third-grade politics. Grow up, Donald Trump.  Grow up.”

Beck’s remarks follow his appearance at the Stop the Iran Nuclear Deal rally in Washington, D.C. on Wednesday afternoon. Trump also spoke at the event, as did Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas), another White House hopeful.

...

Beck also slammed former Gov. Sarah Palin (R-Alaska) for cozying up with Trump during Wednesday’s rally.

“I’m embarrassed I was once for Sarah Palin,” he said of the 2008 GOP vice presidential nominee.

“I don’t care what Sarah Palin says anymore,” Beck added after seeing her speak with Trump. “Sarah Palin has become a clown.”

...

But the idea of swinging the cameras and keyboards a little to the Left and talking to the people who have been right all along?

Never.  Gonna.  Happen.

It's a funny old world.

Well, at least I can get a few more miles out of some of my vintage graphics.

The Wingnut Circle Is Now Complete -- Update

If you are a normal person living a normal life, you would not know that a guy named Andrew Sullivan is in the middle of another of his periodic tantrums about the McCarthyism of Liberals.

The left is turning really, really ugly again.

Between you and me (because no one else reads this stuff :-) Mr. Sullivan's periodic Holier Than Thou outbursts of hysterical histrionics about the horrors of the Lefty Liberal Left are getting to be a bit of a bore, but I guess he needs something to fizz up his Pot-'n-Popes-'n-Stuff blog's otherwise mostly trivial parade of aggregated-other-people's-stuff and pop-culture filler.

Part of his problem stems from the fact that, even after +30 years spent Opining Very Loudly About America, it is glaringly obvious that Mr. Sullivan knows shit-all about some of the most basic roots and branches of this country's politics and culture. He is, for example, perpetually flummoxed by the fact that American Conservatism as it is practiced in the real word bears no relationship to the academic, dorm-room-bong-a-thon Conservatism of his imagination.  He also still cannot wrap his head round the fact that, here in these United State, bible-sanctioned white male supremacy and all of it's various, mutant offspring remain a really big deal (a rough equivalent of Mr. Sullivan's cluelessness would be me moving to Ireland 30 years ago, growing famous by punditing about Irish politics and society and yet, after 30 years, still being unable to grasp why the Irish continue to insist on making a big deal about the English.)

Mr. Sullivan is also, by all appearances, incapable of comprehending that American Liberalism is not a carbon copy of British Liberalism, nor is it defined by the handful of LGBT activists -- primarily clustered around the few square mile of D.C. and New York where Mr. Sullivan spends most of his time -- with whom he has been engaged in a prolonged pissing contest for the last few decades.

However, rather than write my umpteenth post detailing Mr. Sullivan's flat-footed hypocrisy on the subject of free expression (See, "Ferguson, Niall", "Dynasty, Duck" and "Baldwin, Alec")  --

-- this time I'll let people who draw a salary for writing this stuff carry the ball:

Dear Andrew Sullivan, 'Left-Liberal Intolerance' Did Not Bring Down Mozilla's CEO

Andrew Sullivan has come to the defense of the Mozilla CEO, Brendan Eich, writing that Eich is being treated as a "heretic," a victim of "left-liberal intolerance" and the "ugly intolerance of parts of the gay movement," forced to resign in the wake of stinging criticism of his financial contribution to the passage of Proposition 8 in California in 2008. 

According to Sullivan, the gay mafia has struck again, destroying a man and bringing him down because he would not conform to its thinking. You would be justified in being massively confused by that, because this is the same Andrew Sullivan who was first out of the gate with the pitchfork, driving Alec Baldwin off MSNBC -- as Baldwin bombastically charged that he was the victim of Sullivan and his "fundamentalist wing of gay advocacy."

It may sound contradictory, but actually, it's all pretty consistent for Sullivan if you think of it this way: He often attacks liberals first, and homophobes second. Alec Baldwin is a liberal (whom Sullivan, rightly, believed was getting a pass from some sectors of the liberal establishment), and so are those among Mozilla's employees and users of its Firefox browser who criticized the Mozilla CEO, driving him to step down.

Now, I wholeheartedly agree with Sullivan on his criticisms of Baldwin. I, too, slammed Baldwin -- and incurred the wrath of many of his fans who called in to my radio program -- because homophobic speech and actions must be vigorously challenged whether they come from a progressive or a conservative. But if you're going to get worked up over a guy hurling the word "cocksucker" in the heat of the moment -- while he also gave money and support to the causes of LGBT rights and marriage equality -- you should be completely outraged by a man unapologetically giving money to a hate campaign that helped pass Prop 8 by demonizing gay men and lesbians in television ads charging that gays are dangerous to children. The damage done by those ads is incalculable, turning neighbors in California against one another, empowering anti-gay bullies in schools as well as the bashers on the streets.

But Sullivan is even more wrong because it wasn't the Prop 8 contribution, and Eich's refusal to renounce it, that eventually did Eich in. He was being defended by company executives last week and throughout the early part of this week, even as the dating site OKCupid had urged users to boycott Firefox. Eich even gave an interview on Tuesday suggesting he was staying put. Eich only announced he was stepping down after it was revealed late Wednesday that he'd given money to Pat Buchanan's presidential campaign in 1992, and later to Ron Paul's campaign. Suddenly, in addition to defending a CEO who gave money to homophobic efforts, Mozilla would have to defend a CEO who supported Buchanan, a far-right extremist and isolationist who's been accused of racist and anti-Semitic attacks, and who also was, rightly, driven off MSNBC -- though that took years longer to accomplish than the few weeks it took to purge Alec Baldwin.

...

One detail the author fails to note is that, in addition to brutally excoriating MSNBC for their decision to hire Mr. Baldwin in the first place, then eagerly whipping up the torch-and-pitchfork mob that drove MSNBC to fire Mr. Baldwin, Mr. Sullivan, also congratulated MSNBC on sacking Baldwin after they had done the mobs bidding:

MSNBC did the right thing.

But now that Mr. Sullivan wants to get up on his hind legs and emote indignantly in opposition to something which he was so recently squeeeeeealing in favor of, he has to resort to the most truly Conservative dodge of all -- weaselly sniveling about how he never really meant what he meant or say what he said:

I never called for Baldwin to be fired – just that his rank use of homophobia while threatening violence made his claim to be a liberal preposterous. I was calling out hypocrisy.

I suspect at least part of the reason Mr. Sullivan sports a beard is because he can't stand the sight of Don Rumsfeld --

-- leering back at him every time he looks in the mirror.

UPDATE:

Mrs. Betty Bowers points out still more evidence of Mr. Sullivan's, uh, ethical versatility:

When it comes to Prop 8 boycotts, Andrew Sullivan likes to multitask: He’s both FOR and AGAINST them. pic.twitter.com/Fwlj77Q8Mn

— Mrs. Betty Bowers (@BettyBowers) April 5, 2014

Meanwhile, on the other side of the moral universe, from worker bees at Bill Kristol's odious Weekly Standard:

I have to say that @sullydish is really fighting the good fight. http://t.co/3PfvKtPkv7
— Mark Hemingway (@Heminator) April 5, 2014

To water carriers at Rich Lowry's odious National Review:

Andrew Sullivan is indispensable on issues such as this.
— Charles C. W. Cooke (@charlescwcooke) April 4, 2014

Mr. Sullivan makes friends wherever he goes.

Both Siderism, Supersized

Remember this guy?

The guy who Roger Ailes hired to make Lonesome Rhodes

look like William Sloan Coffin?

The culture-war criminal and profiteer who made a fortune whipping the Pig People into a state of constant, unholy frenzy

and then made another fortune selling them prepper seeds and doomsday gold and an endless supply of Threshold Edition-published claptrap?

The guy who, one year ago, was busy hyping his own Randite Epcot walled-off Utopia scam called Jonestown Lil' Mordor Kim Jong-Un's Waterpark Adventure The Village Potemkin Acres The Clans of the Alphane Moon Cleveland Park Independence, USA?



Yeah, that guy.

Well now he's branched out from fake outrage bomb throwing and conspiracy mongering to fake contrition

over his suddenly epiphany that a career spent exhorting imbeciles to set the woods on fire at 50,000 decibel might have somehow caused some, y'know, woods to be set on fire.

Over on my Liberal teevee, Squint and the Meat Puppet were so blown away by Mr. Beck's sincerity (Because OMFG, he has So Much Money!) they devoted an entire segment to tag-team tongue-bathing him  (which was extra-super special because, as Meat Puppet explained, no one has been more harsh in their criticism of Glenn Beck than he.)

According to your Liberal teevee, how big a deal was Mr. Beck's few minutes of fake atonement?  So Fucking Big that, as Meat Puppet explained, it didn't even matter if he was lying about it because (no kidding) Capitalism!

Don't try to figure it out.  Just let the authentic frontier wingnut gibberish over you and move on.

How big a deal was it?

So Fucking Big that instead of using their regular workaday tin cup to drizzle their Fake Centrist poison into America's political discourse, they went ahead and emptied an entire slop-trough of the stuff, raw, into the well-water.

So Fucking Big that, by my count, they had to scamper down to the Liberal teevee cellars to bring up another Nebuchadnezzar of Both Siderist Special Reserve five different times to properly celebrate the occasion of Mr. Beck's crocodile tears:

The Loud Gargling Noise You May Have Heard Earlier -- UPDATE

Was the sound of NBC Legitimate Journalist Mark Halperin giving Glenn Beck one the the noisiest radio blowjobs I have heard in a long time.

Highlights included Mr. Halperin explaining how "honored" he was to be on Glenn Beck's radio show

after which he spent several minutes loudly agreeing with Beck on the "obvious" Liberal bias of the media, and how he has to explain to those few, ign'rant journalists who may dispute Mr. Halperin's infinite wisdom in such matters that whether it is true or not, "over 50%" of Murrica believes the media to be the Commie Stooges of the Kenyan Usurper.  And that is the important thing.

What Mr. Halperin somehow failed to mention is that some considerable fraction of those people who will swear on the bones of their sainted Confederate ancestors and the Second Amendment that the media is in the pocket of the Kenyan Usurper, believe it so fervently because Conservative moles like Mark Halperin regularly scrape together the "legitimate media" cred they get from working at places like NBC, walk it across town, and hand it over to demagogues like Glenn Beck.

And while this is the point at which I arrived at my destination and turned off my radio, all across Murrica, millions of angry wingnuts kept right on listening, nodding along with every tic and toc of Glenn Beck's meandering paranoid schtick.

Just like they do every day.

Just like they have done week after week.

Month after month.

Year after year after year.

Update:  Welcome Esquire Readers and thanks to Mr. Charles Pierce for the link!

And just in case you thought I was kidding, here is the entire 17.5 minute exchange in all of its mutual-masturbatory technicolor glory.  It is not embeddable at this time, but if you have ever wondered what a visual rendering of Shakespeare's

...In the rank sweat of an enseamed bed,
Stew'd in corruption, honeying and making love
Over the nasty sty—

might look like...

Mammon on the Mount

Or would "Stations of the Crass" be more apt?

Or perhaps "Old Whine in New Skins"?

Hard to say.

Maybe all of them, because when America's favorite sociopathic grifter starts making headlines by taking his patent med'cine freakshow to the Holy Lands to relieve a small group of pilgrimaging goobers of their extra cash, there is really no hammer big enough to adequately compass 'round my simultaneous contempt for Beck's grotesque perversion of Christianity and my profound embarrassment that I live in a country where millions of my fellow citizens actually take this fucknozzle's words as solid gold gospel.

From the Daily Beast:

What’s Beck Doing in Israel?

Michelle Goldberg

Aug 24, 2011

At the first of three rallies he is holding in Israel, Glenn Beck preached to his followers like a pastor. Michelle Goldberg reports on Beck’s ridiculous attempt to become a religious leader.

...
On Monday, in the first of three rallies he’s holding in Israel, a mostly American audience gathered in the ancient Roman amphitheater in the northern seaside town of Caesarea to hear from Beck and leading end-times preachers like John Hagee and Mike Evans. “I have spent the last few years trying to find a solution to what’s going on [in] the world,” said Beck, standing on a floodlit stage at the pit of the open-air structure, Roman columns behind him and the scent of the ocean in the air. “Anybody who’s listened to me or watched me for the last few years, you know about five years ago I said, ‘We’ve got to get off the exits. We’ve got to get off the exits. We’re passing the exits!'”

His voice grew more and more urgent, sounding rather like Gene Wilder’s Willy Wonka narrating the Wondrous Boat Ride: “There’s going to come a time when there’s nothing but freeway and a cliff!” Then, suddenly oddly calm, he said, “We’re there.” From the crowd, there were scattered assents. “While there may not be a political solution, the good news is, the God of Abraham ain’t running for office!” The cheering crowd leapt to its feet. “Be not afraid! Know who he is! Know his face! Know that he is a God of covenants and a God of miracles! We are leaving the age of man-made miracles of spaceflight, and we are reentering the age of miracles of God.”
...

Beck is working closely with David Barton, the GOP operative and conservative revisionist historian, on “Restoring Courage.” The two acted as cohosts on Sunday night, and donations to the event are being channeled through Barton’s Wallbuilders organization. Barton’s record on Jewish issues is no better than Beck’s. He built his career by arguing, via a selective reading of documents from the Founding Fathers, that the Constitution is rooted in biblical values and that the founders never intended to separate church and state. And early on, he found an eager audience for his dubious history lessons on the right-wing fringe.
...

Prepare Ye, the Way of the Fraud.

Whoric Goldwinger

The day when he can no longer get rich lying to dolts, is the day Mr. Beck will scurry off to the next scam.

Because some scales

will never fall from his eyes.

Sunday Morning Comin’ Down -- Part 1

Life in the K-Hole.

The mood was brooding and feverish today at the Mouse Circus, where the Three Rings were evenly divided between the fascism-dressed-up-in-a-clown-suit Buffoonionism of Glenn Beck's tent-revival freak show

the sobering fifth anniversary of Katrina, and the somewhat fatuous discussion of the failure of the US Education system led by a man whose credentials consist mostly of running the Chicago Public School system for about 11 minutes under Da Mare...and being in the right place at the right time with the right outside jump shot to earn him a place as one of Barack Obama's b-ball buddies.

It came across as a strangely unrelated grab-bag of odd ends, unless you were inclined look at it from a different angle...

Consider that we pissed away the Clinton Surplus on tax breaks for George Bush’s friends.

Then we pissed our way into endless deficits so that Dick Cheney’s friends could loot Iraq on the American taxpayer’s dime.

Now we find ourselves dead-ass broke and with really serious problems.

We find that we have not spent nearly enough money to fix New Orleans (Conservative answer: blame the darkies.)

We have not spent nearly enough money to fix our busted education system (Conservative solution: blame the unions.)

We have not spent nearly enough money to rebuild our economy on fundamentally sound foundations (Conservative solution: blame...well...anybody but us.)

So, what should we do?

Well, according to the commercial I saw today by the newly-embearded Fred Thompson on Fox News, apparently the Greatest Threat to Our Way of Life are scary, America-destroying “Automatic Tax Increases”.

This guy

is in danger people!

Call!
Write!
Email!

Fred Thompson’s shilling for the plight of poor, victimized billionaires was directly preceded by 30 minutes of babbly incoherence by Glenn Beck as one of Rupert Murdoch's employees interviewed another of Rupert Murdoch's employees on what he thinks of yesterday’s epic flop of an exercise in one-man Rupert Murdoch-promoted ego-onanism.

Exclusively!

Beck’s advice? He thunders that the country's troubles have nothing to do with economics or social justice. He rages and weeps that we are in trouble exclusively because people have turned from God.

Just like the Founders warned about!

Got that?

The Fox prescription for American salvation is a nation on it’s knees: half the time servicing the wizened dicks of its plutocrats, and half the time praying to Glenn Beck and his Mormon Mammon for salvation and redemption and maybe, petty-please, someday if you are very, very good you can have a nice paper route with enough benefits so you can take your sick kid to a doctor.

And don't forget to never look up and into the eyes of your masters, but instead to always, always, always blame your plight on "Those People". Whoever your masters designate as "Those People" this week.

Because this is all part of your New and Better Life inside the K-Hole.

Never heard of the K-Hole?

I’m not surprised.

It is an expression with two, distinct meanings -- one drug-related, and one borne out of the Katrina experience that never took off because I think it was just too damned depressing. The Katrina-inspired meaning comes from the idea that we are now not only seeing big, important pieces of America break down at genuinely catastrophic levels, but in our Brave New Conservative nation -- for the first time in our history -- we are also seeing leaders who really didn’t give a shit about it.

Sadly, the primary definition of the term --

“When consuming too much special k (ketamine)...you fall into this thing where you’re awake and know what’s going on but can’t move or do anything...”

-- works identically well to describe both a drug-induced wide-awake-coma, and the status quo in American politics.

Life in the American K-hole means life inside the cultural bubble of an empire whose rulers have begun a long, craven retreat from the responsibility of maintaining the nation’s basic territorial and economic integrity.

Life in the American K-hole means life under leaders who are content to let whole cities slide into oblivion. Who plunged us into disastrously ill-conceived wars. Who watched the whole nation -- the whole world -- teeter on the brink of economic oblivion, slapped a few Band-Aids on the problem, and then moved with lightening speed to further enrich the looters who nearly killed us in the first place.

Life in the American K-hole means life under a new aristocracy who have decided they no longer want to be burdened with performing the basic functions to governance, and who know they have finally rigged the game to completely that they let us the rest of us rot without any personal consequences to themselves. Who know they can shrug it all off because they own the media and the government.

Who have slapped their own, private padlocks on the levers of power.

Who are perfectly happy with feudalism, because they are its Lords and Ladies.

Who are perfectly cool with an exhausted and distracted America slowing collapsing into a totalitarian corporate state, because the power of that State will never be pointed at their heads.

Who believe the world is a pretty fine place as long as they and are theirs are still piling up obscene profits.

And if the rest of us are basically fucked, well maybe you should just pray harder, loser!

Understanding life in the American K-hole means understanding why this creepy exchange between two of of Rupert Murdoch's employees on Rupert Murdoch's “Fox News Sunday” makes such weirdly perfect sense on the 5th anniversary of That Huge Bush Fuckup Which Must Never Be Mentioned during which the call-and-response consisted of Wallace asking "questions" and Beck barking out clusters of 10-syllable wingnut bumper stickers.

Chris Wallace: There may have never been anything like Glenn Beck’s Whitestock on the D.C. Mall, ever in all of American history. What was the message of the day, Glenn?

Glenn Beck: Message for the day? Screw that. This was a message for the fucking ages!

Wallace: Whether it was tens of thousands…or hundreds of thousands…or billions and billion of people…what was the political message?

Beck: Whether it was 300,000…or 600,000….or a scajillion -- however many it was -- I don’t know what they’re trying to say. They were saying that they’re unhappy. They want to know “Where are you taking us?”

Beck: I don’t know what they want.

Beck: You should demand the truth!

Beck: Stand in the Burning Bush!

Wallace: As to the date, you claim it was both a coincidence and “divine providence” (yes, he literally said “divine providence”). What exactly are you reclaiming?

Beck: People talk about the “damage I have done to racial politics”. But speaking as a rich, white demagogue, I think race shouldn’t be in politics. I wasn’t even born during the Civil Rights movement.

Beck: We’re seeing justice perverted. This is about people of faith and not politics!

Wallace: But the civil rights movement had an agenda. Had some fucking direction or purpose. The civil rights movement was always about an economic agenda.

Beck: That’s part of the part of the Civil Rights movement that I disagree with. Just like the New Black Panthers! OMFG!

Wallace: But Martin Luther King was assassinated while leading the “Poor People’s Campaign.” Which was explicitly about economic justice.

Beck: I didn’t intentionally put it on 8/28. Believe in the power of one person. Everyone wants a shot. Beyond that it’s politics. This not about politics.

Beck: People of faith!

Beck: Equal shot!

Beck: Justice!

Beck: Equal shot!

Beck: Justice!

Beck: Shot!

Beck: Justice!

Beck: Shot!

Beck: Justice!

Beck: Shot!

Beck: Justice!

Beck: Content of character!

driftglass: And regarding your hideously bigoted comments about Obama being a racist which would have gotten your ass fired from any organization other than Fox or Aryan Nation.

Beck: Obama’s viewpoints are Black Liberation Theology. That’s what I was sensing at the gut level.

Beck: But this is not about politics!

Wallace: The central message was to get straight with God. Who made you the God Squad?

Beck: Obama is Marxism disguised as religion!

Beck: But this is not about politics!
Beck: What does Obama believe? That your salvation it tied to Collective Salvation! Because he is the fucking radical Marxist stalking horse for Jeremiah Wright!

Beck: But remember, this is not about politics!

Beck: The country is in trouble because people have turned from God. Just like the Founders warned about!

Beck: But let me repeat, this is not about politics!

And now let us pause for a word from Fred Thompson about the Evil Marxist Democrats and their radical plans to destroy the Greatest Country in the History of the World by taxing the blood-money of American Heroes like Rupert Murdoch to help pay the maintenance costs of the Greatest Country in the History of the World.

End of Part 1.

Teevee Crackpot Calls For Joining Him

to "end this destructive conflict"



and "bring order to the Galaxy".

(h/t ShitMyDarthSays)

A random sampling of my tweets from today's Mormonburg Rally, with some after-market improvements added to better serve You The Customer:

• Glenn Beck: The Pod Piper.

• Beck now going for the Castro Record for godawful, incoherent, rambling crap punctuated with random quotes.

• What does America do with its mistakes? It gives them jobs on Fox teevee.

• Glenn Beck wants to put giants into your children?

• Thinking about using my last $$ enroll in Grifter School. The money is great and you literally don't need to know shit.

• Glenn Beck filibusters so you don't have to.

• Sacrifice! Sacrifice! Ba'al demands a sacrifice!

• Glenn Beck: Not a fearmonger. He's an icemonger. Just like Jesus!

• Glenn Beck says God caused 9/11. No, seriously. That's what he just said.

• I think Beck just urged his Beckolytes to turn off Fox News.

• Quit looking to other people to get you to the moon! Pick up your stick!

• Today we celebrate the day when Giant Pilgrims...landed on the moon?

• And God said "I shall send you a man with a schtick".

• This is rivaling Nixon's resignation speech for random, rambly incoherence. My dad was a lemon farmer who picked up his stick and went to Mars, bitches!
  

• This is like watching HAL getting its memory cards pulled. Puking out random syllables. Daisy...Jesus..Give me your ans..er...doooo.

• Vietnam...trees...freedom...giants...why?...dirty water...for us to reflect...and a bunch of guys.

• Glenn Beck: When I was 18 yo, I used to buy weed on this very spot!

• So the Washington Monument is made of...mood ring stuff? Look at it! Look! It is angry!

• Shorter Beck: Quit reading history, kids. It'll only make you mad.

• "In a world..." (Video) Glad to see Miguel Ferrer is still getting Voice Over work.

• (After camera finds lone black man in crowd) CSPAN finally tracks Juan Williams down.

• We lost our manufacturing base because...we were sinful? Want those Maytag jobs back? Pray harder!

• Next up, Pussy Galore and her team are supposed to gas the crowd, after which Beck will steal all their gold.

• "We're all born knowing the truth"? So all you need to know is how to shit yourself and cry? Teabagging finally explained!

• "...which is why Mr. Hunstman unstintingly supports stem cell research."? Say it! Say it!

• "Hello Sodom! City by the bay!"

• "Glenn Beck is one of the Confederacy's most trusted and honored citizens."

• "Winners Never Cheat", now with forward by George W. Bush.

• Shorter Whitestock: Random verb+random verb+random adjective +Jesus! Rinse and repeat.

• This reads like Glenn Beck's copy-and-paste book report on a whole lotta shit he never read. Goodness is...Good!

• So Far, GoldLine "medals" for Baseball, Jesus and War. Next up, the GoldLine "medal" for Excellence in Apple Pieing.

• Tony (LaRussa) didn't know about this fine organization until he read the check.

• Where have all the truthies gone? Long time passing. Where have all the truthies gone? Gone to buy some gold...

• Three women stood out in the ministry, just like the Women of Glenn Beck. Clotho, Lachesis and Atropos?

• ...And I'd like to thank GoldLine for the "medals".

• What the fucking is a "Navy Sill"?

• It terribly sad that GWB's lies screwed up that nice lady's family.

• Shorter Whitestock: First, everybody came to America and got along great. Then, the 16th Cent happened. Then Jesus wrote the Constitution.

• Thus ends the today's national gathering of the Stick Picker Uppers.

• Onward Xian Stick Picker Uppers...Marching as to where?

• Shorter Whitestock :"Oh, well, of course, everything looks bad if you remember it." Homer J. Simpson

• I feel like I've eaten three pounds of Silly Putty.

• Kept waiting for Trashcan Man to show up dragging a nuke.

A Beck Poster

Of our very own.

Beckaloids to Gather in D.C.

To celebrate the 85th anniversary of their first, glorious Washington rally.

On Air Tomorrow Was On Air Today

It appears that I will be I was on the radio machine today (08/26/10) -- one of the guests on the Progressive Radio Network News Dissector Program (or "programme" for you Brits) hosted by Danny Schechter at 10:30 EST (9:30 Richie Daley Time).

I'll have my bit up as a podcast as soon as the good people at PRN are done editing out all the "fucks".

The subject was putatively "Glenn Beck", but we wandered far and wide.

Beck claims, instead of a speech, he has only jotted down a few bullet points, just in case, say Almighty God wants to speak through him.

Or something.

Because it would be rude to Yahweh to tell Him to sit His ass down and wait until the Thin White Kook

is done with his fucking 216-slide "Me At Last! Me At Last!" PowerPoint.

Or something.

I, on the other hand, tend to believe that his foreign paymasters and radical right wing handlers have somewhat greater ambitions in mind:

Me At Last! Me At Last!

Thank Fox Almighty, it's all about me at last!

From AlterNet:

Glenn Beck to Hold Tea Party Rally on Anniversary of MLK Speech: How Conservatives Are Trying to Hijack Martin Luther King Jr.'s Dream

Only a few weeks after whitewashing the entire slave trade by falsely claiming our Founding Fathers were both black and white, Glenn Beck is on another mission: the Fox news host is planning a massive “take our country back” Tea Party rally at the Lincoln Memorial -- on the anniversary of the day Martin Luther King delivered his "I Have a Dream" speech.

Beck's publicity event pulls the rug out from under civil rights champions who planned a rally honoring King’s memory on that day, but they are organizing to fight back. “We're going to get together because we are not going to let Glenn Beck own the symbolism of Aug. 28, 2010,” said National Urban League President and CEO Marc Morial. “We need to collaborate and bring together all people of good will, not just black people, on Aug. 28 to send a message that Glenn Beck's vision of America is not our vision of America.”
...

Can we all finally get over the idea that there is some sludgy, hate-ridden depths to which the Wingnut Leadership Caste will not sink, and for which the Pig People will not wildly applaud them?

Today Is The Day

When the Wasilla Scintilla...


...got to publish her mash notes to Glenn Beck...


...in Time Magazine (The "Top 100" Issue. h/t Sadly, No!)

Glenn Beck

By Sarah Palin Thursday, Apr. 29, 2010

...
Glenn's like the high school government teacher so many wish they'd had, charting and connecting ideas with chalk-dusted fingers — kicking it old school — instead of becoming just another talking-heads show host. Self-taught, he's become America's professor of common sense...

His love of the Founding Fathers inspires others to learn and respect our nation's history. Best of all, Glenn delights in driving the self-proclaimed powers-that-be crazy. (The whole country awaits the red phone ringing!) Even his critics...have to admire his amazing ability to galvanize everyday Americans to better themselves...

Meanwhile in Totally Unrelated News, the Washington Pest Post would totally love it if you would, uh, like, work for free!

From the Maryland Politics Watch:

Why MPW Turned Down the Washington Post

Five weeks ago, I received an unsolicited offer from the Washington Post. They asked if they could post my picture and biography on their website and link to every new blog post appearing here if I agreed to produce regular original content for them at their request. I turned them down. Why?

Because they wanted me to work for them for nothing.

The Post is organizing a “local blogging network” linking to selected blogs from their website and asking bloggers to submit original content, which would be edited by them. The Post’s rights to that content would be enforceable under a written agreement. That agreement was written as follows...

I must go now and find many things to drink.

Many, many things.

Greg Stillson's Glenn Beck's

Date With Destiny

From the NYT:

Glenn Beck Stakes Out a More Activist Role in Politics
By BRIAN STELTER

Glenn Beck, the popular and outspoken Fox News host, says he wants to go beyond broadcasting his opinions and start rallying his political base — formerly known as his audience — to take action.

To do so, Mr. Beck is styling himself as a political organizer. In an interview, he said he would promote voter registration drives and sponsor a series of seven conventions across the country featuring what he described as libertarian speakers.

On Saturday he held a festive campaign-style rally in The Villages in Florida, north of Orlando, in which he promoted his recently released book, “Arguing With Idiots,” and announced another book to come next August filled with right-leaning policy proposals gathered from the conventions.
...

In describing the conventions, he told the crowd on Saturday: “You’re going to learn about finance. You’re going to learn about community organizing. You’re going to learn everything we need to know if you want to be a politician.”

His staff would not say whether particular candidates for office in the 2010 midterm elections would be invited to speak at the conventions or the August rally.

As for the question of Mr. Beck’s intentions, “He might just be trying to sell books, but there are much simpler ways to sell books,” said Ari Rabin-Havt, a vice president at Media Matters, the liberal media monitoring group. He said Mr. Beck sounded more like a presidential candidate than a pundit.

Catch an average, semi-literate "Conservative" Beck fan out in the cold light, brandish one or ten or a hundred of Beck's million racist, liquidationist, of just plain fucking de-ranged public remarks in their face and they'll smirk and shrug and swear on the life of Dale Earnhardt, Jr. that Beck ir harmless. That he's just an "entertainer".

That it's all just fun and games.

Of course back home, jerking off under an Army blanket to a rerun of their favorite Beckian rant

while they whimper "Mister Preeeeesident" into their commemorative "Fair and Balanced" needlepoint throw pillow, it's quite a different story.

A very old and very ugly story.

Glenn Beck is as pure a product of News Corp as Big Bird or Elmo is a product of The Jim Henson Company; Rupert Murdoch's own fascist stalking horse Lil' Lonesome Rhodes

Crying Baby Doll.

One of Hate Media's gibbering, raging band of veal crate-raised rough beasts.

Slouching relentlessly towards Washington and Destiny.