Two of MSNBC's most ubiquitous Never Trumpers had their own colloquy at their
own clubhouse this week, and the subject of you and me came up.
(Obligingly-but-not-surprisingly, it just happens to fit hand-in-glove with a
TL;DR post I've been fiddling with for a week and published earlier
today entitled "The Seven Horcruxes of True Conservatism".)
This is a free-sample snippet of the Bulwark's
"Just Between Us", subscription podcast. The snippet is entitled
“Cancer Versus Heart Attack".
Charlie Sykes is reporting back from a conference held at "an undisclosed
location in Phoenix, Arizona" last week, but which my sources tell me was
something called the "Patriots & Pragmatists conference".
Which is described by The New York Times as a coalition of
“leading donors and operatives from the right and left", and which,
according to one of the many organizations which gives them large sums of
money is...
"...a fiscally sponsored project of Policy Impact, is a cross-ideological
network and convening space through which civic leaders and influencers
debate, envision, and realize a brighter future for American democracy.
The project was founded on a simple proposition: that people of goodwill
from across the political spectrum could put aside their differences to
explore together how to address the various challenges facing American
democracy. Intentionally curated and well-facilitated convenings, along
with active network weaving, are the centerpiece of the project’s work,
enabling participants to build deep and lasting connections across
ideological and disciplinary lines."
Which is more fizzy, frothy, empty consultant-speak than I've heard since days
when I was in upper management at the City of Chicago. I mean, doesn't
"intentionally curated and well-facilitated convenings" sound like
something that'd run you $50 extra on the charcuterie board of the most
pretentious restaurant you've even been to?
Anyway, both he and fellow-Bulwarkian Mona Charen attended and this was their
takeaway.
Charlie Sykes: How do you defend liberal...
Sorry, I've gotta stop for just a moment to explain a thing. Whenever
Mr. Sykes talks about "liberal democracy", he gets very worried that someone
out there somewhere might think he was defending icky
liberals like me and you, so he always stops to make it very
clear that he is not an icky liberal.
Sykes: ...We talk a lot about democracy. What we really mean is liberal constitutional democracy... So it is about small "L" liberalism
when we're combatting the rampant illiberalism that we're seeing around
the country. And... and the point was raised by many of the people
there, including me, that you cannot defend liberalism against
illiberalism if you ignore the...
Wait for it...
Wait for it...
Sykes: ...if you ignore the illiberalism on the Left.
And there it is!
Sykes: Not this is not to say that they are equivalent...
Except that is exactly what you're about to do.
Sykes: ...but we have a two front war here.
Weird that our "ally" thinks of us as one of the enemies in a "two front war",
don'tcha think?
And then, Sykes mounts his High Horse and we're off to the Both Sides Do It
races. There is the usual yadda yadda yadda, and then:
Sykes: And the best analogy -- the best analogy -- was this description
of this. And I've been trying to find out whether anyone has written
it, so this is why I wanted to ask you [Mona Charen] about it, because you
would know about this. Was to compare what is the, uh, various
threats. The dealing with the anti-democratic illiberalism of the
MAGA Right is a heart attack.
But the illiberalism of the Left is more like cancer.
This is who we are supposed to treat as our ally, kids. Who we are told
to defer to and if we find any faults with them, for God's sake, shut the fuck
up because democracy is at stake! Which is passing strange considering
that Sykes is never rebuked for shitting on us, which he does on a daily basis
from a platform vastly larger than any Liberal will ever have.
Sykes: So they're both serious, but in terms of what you need to
focus on right now, we need to focus on the heart attack. When
someone has a heart attack, you don't worry about chemotherapy. You
just... you save the patient. [yadda yadda yadda Donald Trump] But
it's naive to think that we don't have a problem [on the Left.]
Sykes then lapses into his "Unnamed Liberal Person Who Might Object To My
Bullshit" voice. And if you listen to him for any length of time, you'll
notice that none of the objections to his obviously biased bullshit come from
any actual Liberal with names and voices. Instead they all come
from same, lazy "some people say" slop trough where Donald Trump finds
all those sweaty, bald men wo are always coming up to him to tell him that
he's a fine, upstanding, Christian man who was the Best President Ever.
Sykes: Now for the people who are saying "Well, you're Both Sidesism!" or,
y'know, "You're drawing a moral equivalence!", no we're making a
distinction here.
He says this very slowly because, as you know, we are all very stupid and do
not understand what words mean.
Sykes: Between what we need urgently to focus on, but also acknowledging
that this thing is real [whatever "this" is] and I... and I think it's a
problem for some of our more progressive listeners and readers that
sometimes they pretend as if it doesn't even exist. So we don't even
talk about it.
Except you and your Never Trump friends talk about it
incessantly.
Well OK, Charlie, I have an easy way for you to find out what Liberals really
think. Instead of limiting your interactions with icky Liberals to a
cage-raised, milk-fed, Bulwark-housebroken
"I agree with everything you have to say, Charlie"
'liberal' like Will Saletan...go toe-to-toe with
Digby.
I dare you.
Or Allison Hantschel.
Or Brother Charlie Pierce.
Or Brad Friedman
Or my wife.
Have some of those "more progressive" people over for a live,
on-the-air chat or two. I guarantee you it would be...lively.
Mona Charen: Oh yes! Members of my family, actually, even, um, y'know, argue
that it's waaay exaggerated and it's not really an issue. And there
are a number of ways you can track that it is an issue. One of them
is, when you look at polling, y'know, of young people, and, well,
Americans in general, but even of college students and others, who say, "How often do you self-censor because you're afraid that you can't say
what you think without fear of retribution?"
and it's very, very high.
She goes on to explain that a group called "people" feel "stifled" because of
a regime of "rigid censoriousness" that we Liberal ruthlessly enforce using
our mighty Liberal thought-control powers.
Which is fucking hilarious: believe me, I try to conjure our mighty Liberal
thought-control powers every day, and I have yet to notice anyone at
The Bulwark or The New York Times or
The Atlantic hesitating to share their ridiculous opinions far and
wide.
I think a big part of the problem is that elite media bubble creatures like
Mona Charen have no clue that people out here in the Real World self-censor
all the time for all kinds of reasons that have nothing to do with our mighty
Liberal thought-control powers.
Trust me, I'm self-censoring like a mother right now.
I was tossed in Twitter jail four times over nothing, and Twitter-banned for
life over less-than-nothing. When I went back to school as an adult and
found myself in classes where I was smarter and more accomplished than the
fragile, suspicious manchild who was teaching a course in research, damn
betcha I kept (most) of my opinions about his qualifications to myself.
You know who else self-censors out here in the real world? Anyone with a
job with an shitty boss, who wants to keep that job. Anyone who goes to
church and doesn't get up and shout "This is all bullshit!" when the
pastor dips into Leviticus, even though they know it's Bronze Age theocratic
garbage. And Liberals, living in Trump country -- out here where there's
racist wingnut sewage vomiting out of the radios 24/7, and the assholes are
rage-drunk and armed to the teeth.
You know who doesn't self-censor out here in the real
world?
The racist troglodyte at the end of the bar who will begin loudly sharing his
rustic views on "the coloreds" after a couple of beers.
Also those aforementioned assholes out here in Trump country,
two-count-'em-two of which I clocked at the hardware store yesterday, each
proudly wearing a different "Trump 2024" cap, and staring daggers at everyone
in the store, practically daring someone to start something.
Also the occasional customers at my stepson's cashier job who feel the need to
spontaneously share with everyone in line whatever it was they sopped up on
Fox last night.
I can personally attest to these examples and a hundred more because, like the
Scarlet Pimpernel, by day I can move among them without causing their
"Obummer-loving libtard" alarms to go off. I look like them. I'm a
bald white guy with a beard and a ball cap. I wear Carhartt flannels and
jeans. And to get along out here in the real world I self-censor every
day, even if it's just taking care not to break out any big vocabulary words
when I'm out and about, because that's a "tell".
As I wrote earlier today...and have, in a sense, been writing for the past 18
years:
So...with six of the seven True Conservative horcruxes stripped away
and destroyed either by the indifference of the GOP base or by the
catastrophes created by True Conservatives actually getting their dearest
wishes granted, what, at last, is left to sustain the rapidly disintegrating
True Conservative soul?
Just two things. Their hardwired sense of moral superiority/contempt for
dirty Liberals like you and me. And, of course, the all-powerful, all-occasion
conjure words that keep this last, mingy fragment of their soul from turning
to ash: Both Sides Do It...
Except, of course...
Both Sides Don't