First Impressions Double Shot! Deadpool & Wolverine / Joker Folie a Deux

We've maybe done a double impression before but this one is special. I'd like to compare these two flicks - Deadpool & Wolverine (2024), which I saw in theaters last July, and Joker 2 (2024), which I saw on MAX a few weeks ago. Both handle fan service in wildly different ways and SPOILER - one was good! You know I'm difficult so gonna say this from the jump, I liked Joker 2 a whole lot better!

Let's rewind. I saw D&W in theaters a year ago (hence this timely post) and I was pretty pumped up. It was a really fun movie, had a lot of great action, enthralling performances, and actually found something to say. I want to go into all that in a bit, but then two things made it fall apart. First, I was pumped when it dropped on Disney+ because I genuinely wanted to ride that ride again but I found it fell totally flat. I think it was really because perhaps more than any movie maybe ever, it was ridiculously reliant on outrageous cameos. Once you know Channing Tatum's Gambit is coming, his actual presence doesn't hold much weight or push the story forward.

There is still a lot I liked about it. Mostly there is an actual thematic resonance there, which is kind of the search for a theme. Deadpool is searching for a reason to matter, which is all kinds of meta when he is trying to find his way in the new Disney / Fox merger that now lets him interact with the Avengers. How can he fit in? Well, that's a really tough puzzle, and just like Adaptation (2002), they just decided to make the movie about that.

This all comes together really well with a not so subtle plot conclusion - the collision of matter and anti-matter. They use Wolverine as a stand-in, since his Logan (2017) was really one of the weightier superhero movies ever, rich with meaning, though, and artistry. Stuff the Deadpool movies generally lack, they're just fun rides (although I really did enjoy Deadpool 2 [2018], I think there's a lot going on there), but they wallow in irreverence, compared to Logan and Wolverine as a character. But it also contrasts with the MCU, which is built upon a lot of big stories that actually matter (okay, fine, they don't, but they do pretend to!).

It made me think of Nathan Fielder's Rehearsal that just wrapped up. Is it possible to create comedy that inspires change? Where is that line? Can you make something silly that is also imbued with enough thematic resonance to actually matter? That is really at the heart of Deadpool & Wolverine. Does it stick the landing? Well, not really, but that final scene is pretty cool. Matter and anti-matter joined together in a climactic sacrifice.

Staying on that point, there were a few things I liked - one, that they didn't show Hugh Jackman's ripped physique until that moment, which seemed like definitely a way to not force him to work out and be shirtless for most of the movie. Again, there's meaning in that joke, though! It works for the theme, giving something goofy the big payoff. I also noted that they kept the mask on him for that, I really wonder if he was CGI...

Also I really hated the mask, a lot of people loved it, I don't think it worked on screen and there was a reason why they kept it off him for 24 years. Whatever, it definitely makes CGI Wolverine a lot easier. But the claws punching the machine was pretty much perfect.

Of course, though, this whole plot makes no sense, like, why was Deadpool rescued by the TVA, only to kill him later as some part of some other plot? It doesn't hold up, none of the TVA stuff really makes sense, you have to squint a lot. The first watch tumbles through on the strength of jokes and excitement. It melts pretty hard on the second watch.

I'll give Hugh Jackman a ton of credit for crafting a pretty different Wolverine than the one in Logan, but still one of the better, richer portrayals. I would have preferred a stronger background for his melancholy, like something out of Old Man Logan where he was tricked into killing the X-Men by Mysterio, but maybe that was too dark? I also noted just how much he said "fuck" in this movie. It's crazy. They really went for it.

Let's get into the rest - I think the whole 'nsync "Bye Bye Bye" gag of cool, violent guy ironically doing stereotypical gay shit is played out beyond played out by now. I feel like Deadpool is ending anyway, which is fine. There's unfortunately not a ton of evolution to be had once you've made that meta commentary. You can't just keep making it, the point is already there. I also found the ending love letter to the Fox-era Marvel movies to be laughable. I literally just ranked these on an unrelated jag and they're all terrible. What are we pining for here? X2: X-Men United (2003)? I mean, that movie's great, but it's not like this nostalgic era. And again, I don't think Deadpool totally earned the right to be sentimental. Deadpool just gets weird when he gets serious.

Okay, so why am I throwing Joker 2 into all this? Well, I really found these to be absolute polar opposite movies. D&W is really built on fan service. You're giving Wolverine the costume and the mask, you have him fight Sabretooth, oooh look it's Pyro! oooh look it's Elektra! oooh look...Gambit... Blake Lively as Ladypool! Like, all this stuff, layer upon layer. Wolverine on the cross, Age of Apocalypse, it's as if it was Leo Pointing at the Screen the Movie. Again, first time around, it largely works out of audacity, and there is some nice throughlines tying it together.

Actually, sidebar, I found it extremely ironic that at some point the plot was just that of Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023), where they completely remove a notably smaller grounded story and put it in a weird alternate world where they spend most of the run time. That's totally just what this movie did. Amazing what cameos can do you for you.

Joker 2 does none of this. Like, blatantly none of this. It's mind-blowing. I approached this with a certain disdain for the first Joker (2019). I really think Todd Philips can write and shoot a movie. The Hangover: Part II (2009) is an absolute gorgeous looking film that everyone ignores because it's The Hangover: Part II. Rich film stock, depth of field, high contrast, lights, shadows, a green yellow haze over the film that matches setting to theme and feeling that lifts when they reach their goal. It's really good. So I approached it with curious optimism, but found a disjointed film that wanted to be King of Comedy (1982) but couldn't be and whose plot beats didn't quite add up, and whose intent appeared ugly and was also taken out of context by pretty much everyone.

Joker 2 made me understand Joker, though. Because I finally got it - I don't think Todd Philips gave a rat's ass about making a Joker movie or a comedy movie. He wanted to make a weird introspective gritty 80s movie. But he couldn't, so he did it through DC and made a billion dollars. Then for some reason they let him do whatever he wanted, so he made an even more introspective film about choosing your identity, social pressures, and accidental inspiration, which happens constantly in this.

I am a firm believe that so many more people would have enjoyed this film if they didn't tie it to the Joker. Like, if it was just about a dude named Arthur Fleck, I think most people would be perfectly fine. But since it has to be an intellectual property, which is how these kinds of films are ever going to get made, people put their own expectations on to what should happen. However, I felt less like my expectations were being poured into this than I did for Deadpool & Wolverine! I literally just gave you a slight rewrite a few paragraphs ago. I was just along for this ride.

The first line in the Wikipedia entry under "Themes and Analysis" says "Critics noted that the film was a work of metafiction designed to intentionally antagonize audiences who were fans of the first film." I disagree, I think intentional antagonization is a strong word. I think that's a reaction you have when you are so put back that you must assume it's intentional. It made a lot of sense to me watching it. Joker only works as the Joker when he is remorseless for his crimes. Joker 2 makes him not the Joker by giving him some humanity. He's a beta male who is tempted with alpha male-ness but then realizes what kind of monster that's making him and then owns up to his mistakes and experiences real growth as a human being. It's an astounding high wire act to pull off. GaGa is there totally wanting him to be Joker and he just refuses because that is all she wants from him. It's stunning.

Could you read GaGa as an audience surrogate, or his fans as audience surrogates? Sure, I guess. But I don't think it's extremely telegraphed that way. It feels more part of the story and authentic then a cheap ploy like that, like it's just a gut reaction. And what would that motivation be? To prank a billion dollars worth of fans of the first film?

I will admit, it's hard to see why Philips went in this direction. It seems like a direction that no one really liked, except maybe GaGa and Joaquin Phoenix. And me. It does feel a bit like a really expensive prank, but if so, I don't know why Philips wouldn't have owned it (like Fleck!) and instead supposedly spent opening weekend on his isolated ranch with the phone unplugged. It's confounding. Like, it was so brave to make this movie the way he did, and then he kind of slunk away in shame.

I can't think of a better commentary on our current culture. Deadpool & Wolverine went for cheap (well, probably not so cheap) cameos, hauling out 90-year old Hugh Jackman, and made fan service the movie and made all the money in the world. I'm not going to totally knock it, but it seems to me like it will struggle to have staying power. Joker Folie A Deux could have done that. They could have gone for big hammers and hyenas, and Batman, and whatever else. Instead, they just bucked fan service at every turn and made Joker into an actual human being and was one of the biggest flops of all time. Yay.

At the end, it does appear as if Fleck inspires the actual, possible Heath Ledger-esque Joker and that's a fun out. But I could live without it. I just keep thinking about how good this thing looks. And why the hell anyone would ever sit through a 2 hr and 18 minute courtroom drama about maybe one of the biggest character misrepresentations since Taskmaster. Why didn't it piss me off, though? Maybe because the Joker is an awful character. I mean, literally, like an awful person, maybe one of the worst people in fiction (but American, dammit!), so if you're going to make him your protagonist, you need to do something interesting with him? Or make him sympathetic in some way? I think it might be as simple as it's just well-constructed, well-shot, and well-acted movie, and those three big things are going to win me over every time.

So, listen, you probably read all the non-sense and wrote off Joker 2, I suggest you go see it. It's the least fan service movie of all time, and I really think that's more in service of crafting a good narrative rather than purposeful antagonization, which is supposedly what we all want. If you're fed up with recycled garbage (Robert Downey Jr. as Doctor Doom! Superman again! Jurassic World: Afterbirth!), maybe check this thing out, I thought it was cool, and bold, and if it truly was just a massive career ending Todd Philips studio prank, well, I'm down for that, too.

2022 Nushelled: More Random Crap

We will drop our heavily vaulted Best Movies of 2022 list soon, but in the never-ending lead-up, we need to talk about all the other wonderful trends and everything of the year. Now, in general this year was fantastic for films. There were a ton of weird and amazing experiences to be had, and I think 2022 will be fondly remembered for many years. Maybe even like a 1999, 2007, or 2014.

That being said, I found it tough to recall particularly great singular defining moments or scores, or music. I really only point out things that are truly great. Not everyone gets a prize every year, people! I kept coming back to the same well. I think 2022's highs were pretty high but definitely in just a select few movies that really struck gold.

Actors of the Year:

I had a few nominees on the men's side, but somehow improbably it's no one but Colin Farrell. Yes, Colin Farrell won 2022. Mostly by appearing as a gonzo cartoon figure in The Batman (2022), a deep and thoughtful competent rescue worker in Thirteen Lives (2022), and then an amazingly sad Irish fellow in Banshees of Inisherin (2022). It's not only the volume here but shocking range of characters and genres that shows that this dude is the real deal. Called it!

Is it kind of weird that we even divide this? Like, what is it about gender that differentiates anyting with acting? Well, we do have a lot of nominees. Nicole Kidman seems to be every where all of a sudden and Jamie Lee Curtis showed range from horror icon to wacky hot dog finger lady! Anya Taylor-Joy and Margot Robbie keep flirting with over-exposure and Ana de Armas is showing that she's more than a pretty face, even if her biggest profile work Blonde is mostly about her being a pretty face.

But let's go with the long-deserving Florence Pugh! Don't Worry Darling (2022) was her big work but she also appeared in Hawkeye at year's end last year, and added The Wonder and Puss in Boots to show her credible range. There isn't really anyone acting like she is in addition to her overexposure and we're here on the Pugh train to stay!

Moments of the Year

Spoilers for the first couple here because it's a few endings: WEIRD: The Al Yankovic's story quickly shows that it has no desire coming anywhere near the true story when Al is gunned down at the Grammys by Madonna. This is really a thing that happens. I also was shook by the donkey eating Brendan Gleeson's fingers in Banshees of Inisherin. I'm sure there's more.

This category was always about highlighting great moments in otherwise dull movies. I don't know if we had a lot of that this year! Or it's about a sequence in an otherwise forgettable superhero film. We have some of those for sure.

Non-spoiler favorites:

The house covered in blood in NOPE

Wanda vs. the Illuminati in Multiverse of Madness

HAVE SEX! In Morbius

Zoey Kravitz gains the upper hand in KIMI

The Family faces their destiny trapped in the earth in The Bob's Burgers Movie (hands down funniest scene of the year)

Barbarian switches to The Adventures of Justin Long

Best Ending:

Dude this movie is not good in anyway, but almost worth sitting through the entire slog to see that in the end the impetus for the entire murder mystery in Bodies, Bodies, Bodies is Pete Davidson being an idiot. It really is worthwhile. Not another movie this year with a worse first thirty minutes and a better last thirty minutes.

Movies Where Every Scene was the Best Scene:

RRR, Ambulance, and Glass Onion are really hard to pick just one. Most are going with the musical dance number (that definitely wins down below!), but I just need to go with the intro. Such a hook.

Ambulance just kept going. Not enough love for what Gyllenhaal does here. Somehow the most Michael Bay-protagonist of all time.

And Glass Onion, it's got to be when everything comes together with the Mona Lisa at the end, right? Phenomenal work here.

Trailers

NOPE or Pearl made me want to see both without spoiling anything. And I'll give Bodies, Bodies, Bodies again a lot of credit for making a great trailer that sold an amazing attitude that the movie couldn't have been farther away from.

Musical Moments

C'mon, man. You know it's RRR for the best bro-down of the year. I mean, all standard Tollywood stuff, but blew our stupid minds.

The best use of other songs probably go Nirvana in The Batman. That just fits so improbably well. And it kept coming back! I thought it was part of the score.

Other Stuff:

Copshop (2021) is a terrible movie that no one should see. It also didn't come out this year. But I'm not going to have another chance to talk about this, dammit. Toby Huss is amazing and in an entirely different movie. A better movie.

We'll get into my top pics on 12/31. Obviously that's when you need to highlight the top movies, people. I watched a lot of movies this year, and not all of them were good. No one's talking about 3000 Years of Longing (2022), which I was very excited for and deeply disappointed by. Same with The Bubble, which might be one of the worst films of all time.

I was also really bummed by Bros. It was just not really a good movie at all, but worse than that, really wanted you to think it was good and different than every other rom com. But it was totally just like every other rom com. I'm sorry, Billy. I really wanted to like this one.

This was just sort of a disappointing year, maybe I got too hyped for directors I like and we got boned. Oh well. Plenty of good things around, too, which you'll see in just a little bit!

2012: The Last Year In Review: Updated Movies 10 years gone!

Hey man, we're going to do this. We're ten years out, time to update our list. I love best of movies list, especially making them smooth, flowing, and changing like water, not set forever in stone like a big rock. We listed our favorite movies at the time ten years ago but things change! Some have staying power, some don't. Some are good because they don't have staying power! It's all relative and there are so many reasons why a movie can be a good movie. But it also takes us a while to catch up to good films. So let's do this again. 2012 re-hash! Let's go!

Here's our shortlist:

The Grey

Wanderlust

Haywire

John Carter

21 Jump Street

Goon

The Cabin in the Woods

Lockout

The Five-Year Engagement

Battleship

Moonrise Kingdom

That's My Boy

Your Sister's Sister

Brave

Magic Mike

The Dark Knight Rises

Ruby Sparks

Celeste and Jesse Forever

The Campaign

The Master

Dredd

Looper

Pitch Perfect

Argo

Seven Psychopaths

Lincoln

Skyfall

Zero Dark Thirty

Django Unchained

I was going through the beginning of the year with so many favorites and thought my list might really get switched up. Then I hit the end and was like, "Oh yeah, here are the heavy hitters. Dang. Your Sister's Sister ain't gettin' in!" Lincoln and Skyfall came out on the same day, folks. 11/09/12. Fun how that works.

Okay, let's pick the big shots. The untouchables, the stood the test of time movies. I've seen all these a few times, except Argo, which I know is the classic Oscar pick and all that crap, but I still really dug it.

The Master

Argo

Lincoln

Skyfall

Zero Dark Thirty

Django Unchained

So that's six. Let's whittle down the rest to find our next top four, taking out the obvious bad picks. I personally enjoy a very high amount of infamously bad films from 2012. Huge year for Emily Blunt and Taylor Kitsch. Funny I gave the nod to Jennifer Lawrence and Joseph Gordon-Levitt (but did actually acknowledge Kitsch). Anyway, if I were to pick only four more...

21 Jump Street

That's My Boy

Brave

The Campaign

I just saw Magic Mike for the first time, and it lived up to all the hype. It ended up being first out, along with Dredd, Looper, and The Grey. 2012 was a great year for mid-budget action films and comedy movies. Two things we don't have any more! It's amazing how when doing the 2022 list I instantly took off No Time to Die, despite liking it a lot, but would never take Skyfall off 2012.

Comparing to the original list (funny we did leave Skyfall off originally), I have retained five of my original picks - The Master, Django, 21 Jump, Lincoln, and Argo. All made my shortlist except Silver Linings Playbook, which just really hasn't stuck with me at all.

Anyway, we've done this before. Let's see how we did when we re-appraised in 2014, 2017 and then just last year. I share a familiar six with 2017, but surprisingly only seven from just two years ago in January 2021. Notably the big six stay the same across those two re-appraisals, with Brave filling in again, but I traded The Campaign, 21 Jump Street, and That's My Boy, three comedies I can watch every day of my life for Celeste and Jesse Forever, Haywire, and The Cabin in the Woods.

I don't know what I was doing in 2014, maybe I just felt like rebelling. Dredd, Goon, The Dark Knight Rises, and Ruby Sparks made the cut for the first and only time, and I'm glad because those are all great movies that should get some recognition. But I only share four movies from this list! And three appear on all five! I make too many of these. Rest assured, I think when this becomes a thing, I'll just do the ten-year reappraisal and that's it.

Some of these are a total product of age and shifting novelty. Cabin is one of those mind-blowing movies upon first and even the ninth year watching, but everything, especially in horror right now is so meta, it's lost a bit of luster. That final scene packs an equal punch, but it's just not as shiny as it once was. It's weird how the comedy movies have kind of cemented themselves in my brain. Haywire is a little awkward with Gina Carano proving herself to be a crazy person. I did re-watch that in the past year and it's as rewarding as ever, but it doesn't quite make it out past the other great action films of the year for me anymore.

I'm very surprised I've never actually ranked Pitch Perfect in there. That's probably because the screenplay doesn't make any sense at all, even if the themes and moments are as rock solid as any movie ever made. Goon is an old favorite that hasn't held up all that well. TDKR could be in there, but there's just better movies. I'm not sure I've seen Ruby Sparks or The Grey since they came out, I should get a refresher. Moonrise Kingdom has proven itself to be quite a lesser Wes Anderson work in the wake of better pictures. Since all his movies are the same, it's tough when one proves itself to be the worst version of everything he does. Lockout is obviously still awesome.

This is obviously self indulgent, so thanks for sticking with us! As for #1, it has to be The Master or Django, I flip-flop every other year. Stay tuned next year when we recap 2013!

First Impressions: THE Batman (But can they be quick please)

Last night I finally saw The Batman (2022). It was okay but maybe pretty good. I usually reserve these first impressions for films I see in theaters, and I am not proud of myself that those are typically just big superhero movies. I'm just feeding the machine, man! Whatever, they're still fun. Same with off brand impressions of movies I watch on HBOMax I guess. Let's get into the definite article Batman! Short this time! I mean, short for me. SPOILERS and Robin!

I thought the first ten minutes was terrible. It was extremely slow to start up and super boring. It did not catch interest at all. What I'd give for a clever bank heist or plan being hijacked. It was just R Patts talking about what all of Batman Begins (2005) did by showing. It was not great.

And to be sure, we'll be comparing a lot of this with previous entries. I hate to do it because I want a film to stand on its own merits, but when a character is in the spotlight to the extent this one is, it just feels inevitable. After the intro it picks up and gets into the characters. I liked the realistic treatment of his rogues' gallery as legit psychopaths and serial killers. The Riddler is terrifying in a good way. There is a line between Jim Carrey and Paul Dano (probably like most things, the Harley Quinn TV show did him best). But Dano is inspired casting, as is most everyone here, even if everyone  is an unusual choice. It almost all pays off. Even John Turturro, who I could only picture standing beneath an enemy robot's scrotum at the Pyramids is menacing as Carmine Falcone.

Gotham is very realized. There are shots that are blatantly Chicago and blatantly NYC, but it feels like it has a rich history, obviously of corruption, and it just exists as this almost parody noir of constant rain, crime, and agony. It's not easy to do, this city and these characters have been done so many times, very tough to find a fresh take, and I think largely they did so.

BUT I really like watching a newer, definitely shittier Batman. There is a lot of redundancy here, especially re: Batman Begins. I  don't know how you avoid that at this point, and it did as good as it's going to get. These movies are in dialogue with each other. Remember when Christian Bale escapes from the police station using a bat attracting gizmo? Pattison escapes by just fighting everyone. The best scene progression early on was him getting into the Iceberg Lounge by just knocking on the door and showing up as Batman. It felt like such an un-Batman thing to do. And the movie agrees! We watch him learn. The second time he arrives, he tricks a guard and slips in, locking the guard out. So totally a Batman move. Like, he's not good at being Batman yet. It reminded me of how Spider-Man: Far From Home (2021)'s ending revealed that all three Tom Holland movies were actually just one big origin story (while skipping the obvious origin that we know). It's all worthwhile - this is the same way, and it's more subtle and clever than a film like this would be twenty years ago. We more see a character origin, starting with someone unfamiliar to us and bringing us to the person we know.

Nolan's  Batman films always seemed to wrestle with justifying every single little thing. I get it, there's no way a man dressing up as a bat and fighting crime would ever make sense. In 2005 it was gratifying. In 2022 people just roll with it. This is by far a more grounded film (if that was even possible), with the exception that we are expected to just accept that Bruce Wayne is definitely a dude who dresses as a bat and beats up criminals. There's no deep reason or origin for this, and for the record, that's a good thing. The world seems to accept him, too. He just kind of hangs out with the cops and in clubs and stuff.

The soundtrack / score set the mood well. There's that one song from the trailers, it shows up a few times and captures the mood terrifically. It is also a dreary, terrible, rain drenched film, but it actually has a more colorful palette than a Zach Snyder movie. The score does sound like the Imperial March, but I give it a pass.

So, rough stuff - and right off the bat, jeez that length. It's sort of justified, but damn if a lot of the story threads aren't wrapped up at the 2 hr 6 minute mark (I checked) and it finds its way to give us another 41 minutes (then 9 of credits. I also checked.) of really wrapping up a single story thread, but not really any character development. That's maybe a stretch, it seems to take until the end for Batman to realize that he needs to be a symbol of hope in addition to vengeance, but there isn't an excuse of "every moment was needed!" in this one. And I do like films where the world is sincerely wrecked at the end without a solution. Again, Begins did this when Batman straight up did not save the Narrows and they presumably ripped each other apart with fear gas. But it just sort of ended. There's a nihilism there that I don't necessarily enjoy but I accept.

And that dreariness. I don't think there's a single wisecrack or bit of lightheartedness here. I get that that's a Marvel thing that gets a lot of backlash for some reason, but also, movies are allowed to breathe and have jokes. I feel as if after the Nolan movies we're scared to let Batman be funny, but at least 50% of his lifetime canon appearances are insane and campy and awesome.

I knew I was getting old when at one point I leaned over to my wife and said, "Say what you want about Batman & Robin (1997) but at least I could take our kids to that!" I just kept thinking about some poor dad on his afternoon with the kids and not really paying attention to what Batman has become in the past twenty years. That is the budding cranky dad in me so feel free to ignore that gripe.

We don't get a clear shot of Pattinson's face without make-up or a mask until 56 minutes in. I checked. I kind of liked that, this really is a movie about Batman and he is almost always in costume. To his credit, he does an insane amount of acting with just his eyes and face and he is a better Batman than George Clooney. But it does feel weird. I dig Pattinson as a dude who made Twilight money and now doesn't give less of a flip about anything and he's the right guy for this role.

Colin Farrell's Penguin is insane, I really couldn't see him at all in there. Not only the face make-up but the voice. The role is showy and he's interesting, but it's probably not really the stuff of Academy Awards, but shit if this doesn't win best make-up. It's insane. Zoey Kravitz is fine as Catwoman - I don't think Anne Hathaway gets enough credit for what she did in that role. We always go back to Pfeiffer, Newmar, Kitt, and Berry. This movie does not do well at all with the Bechdel test, by the way. I think Catwoman does talk to her Russian movie briefly about a not-man but it's not much. And she's bi, right?

Jeffrey Wright might be having a bit of a renaissance. This, What If..., and The French Dispatch (2021) all showcase flawless and drastically different performances. We always knew he was good, but I don't think we realized he was THIS good.

Thematically it seems like this is trying not to be a Chris Nolan "private authority is good" fest (and I sort of argue that by the end of The Dark Knight Rises [2012] that's not the case, but it's still awkwardly, "demagogues prey on your liberal sensibilities and cops need to restore order." It's not great), although that's all surface level. Batman works with the police unlike any other film, but he's clearly just a private citizen who's just able to do whatever he wants only because this random police lieutenant trusts him. There's a lot about systematic corruption and how we can't trust anyone, but also that there are good people working to change things.

Perhaps what I liked the most is how The Riddler and The Batman had the same exact motivation, and upbringing. Well, one was an orphan in a billionaire's tower, the other was in a hellish asylum. But they want the same things. The Riddler just lacks a moral compass and is willing to go far farther in literally cleansing the city. There might have been a sly environmental dig there, too. But this the kind of stuff I wish Morbius (2022) would learn - hero and villain can be similar, but the stories work so much better when they are just a few shades off ideologically and push their powers against each other creatively.

And yeah, the Riddler's powers are his ability to make riddles. That's still badass in this film, which FINALLY treats Batman like the World's Greatest Detective he is. Other films would do that, but it mostly involved Bruce putting evidence in the Batputer and it spitting out the answer. The Dark Knight (2008) did that a lot. Batman messes up a lot in this movie, and it's cool to see him actually work out a case. Him and Jim Gordon are like buddy cops at one point. It's pretty fun. But this elevates the Riddler pretty high, he's always been a notable rogue, but not at Joker or Bane level. This shows what he can do and what a true menace he can be, leading to city-wide destruction.

So I ended up enjoying this a lot, it is definitely not without its flaws, namely the length and grimness, but it's a well made movie for sure. Two bat wings up.

The Unabashed Greatest Upcoming Films of 2022

Another annum is upon us and that means one thing and one thing only. It's time to get HYPED for shit that will definitely suck. I am going to be bold this year and just try not to pick any superhero movies. Oh, that's not fair. I ranked The Suicide Squad (2021) in my Top Ten. Oof. I definitely have some weird picks for things I'm getting kind of excited about, so let's go from there.

Untitled David O. Russell Project

November 4th, 2022

With a catchy title like that what can go wrong! I generally enjoy David O. Russell, particularly his recent output like JOY (2015) and American Hustle (2013), but somehow he hasn't directed a film since then. There is no indication of any kind of plot anywhere, but the cast is ridiculously hot right now, including Anna Taylor-Joy, Rami Malek, Margot Robbie, John David Washington, Zoe Saldana, and Timothy Olyphaunt. These were just my favourite actors, there's also Christian Bale, de Niro, Chris Rock for some reason. It's stupid. Will it be any good? Who knows, but it has my attention.

Bullet Train

July 15, 2022

This is Brad Pitt's first film post-Oscar and it comes from David Leitch, famous part of John Wick (2014)'s success. Atomic Blonde (2017) I actually thought left a lot to be desired just in terms of...having a plot, but his work with Deadpool 2 (2018) and Hobbes & Shaw (2019) is solid. I think this dude can at least handle action, and this movie is apparently about a bunch of assassins on a train fighting, I dunno, each other probably. The cast includes Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Joey King, Zazie Beetz and Brian Tyree Henry in an Atlanta reunion, and also Sandra Bullock for some reason (replacing Lady GaGa?!). I'm in. I like the idea of a bullet train being also filled with bullets. 2021 had a strange amount of train action, from Nobody, Shang-Chi, and Matrix Resurrections but it's a fun action medium. It goes fast, after all.

Nope

July 15, 2022

Jordan Peele has become an automatic hype director after Get Out (2017) and Us (2019), despite me generally disliking Key & Peele a lot. Is he just a horror guy instead? This reunites him with Dan Kaluuya, along with Keke Palmer and Steven Yeun. Not much to go on besides a poster that looks like a cloud sperm or something, but I'm definitely down for whatever racial but also just normal horror he has in store for us.

Moonfall

February 4, 2022

Listen...you may not know this about me, but I am all about movies where the moon falls out of the sky and on to earth. I have been workshopping a novel about it forever. Gravity gets messed up and we try to blow up the moon or whatever. I am so inexplicably and universally down for this. I saw this trailer when I watched Spider-Man and I was just like hell to the hell fucking yeah. Roland Emmerich making some stupid shit again. I don't care, this movie is going to be so dumb, but I love it. We are always at war with the moon. Crash that moon, baby!!

Don't Worry Darling

September 23, 2022

Olivia Wilde is an underrated actress and although she's only had one feature, Booksmart (2019), I dug that a lot. This is getting into deeper and more sinister thriller territory, but Wilde as an actress has bounced between lighter and darker roles and I'm confident she can handle a wide range. The main cast is Harry Styles and Florence Pugh as some kind of 1950s domestic mystery thriller with Chris Pine and Gemma Chan somehow also hanging out. My intrigue is definitely peaked and I hope this is cool.

Ambulance

April 8, 2022

Okay, fine. I said I didn't want to disappoint myself. But this trailer looks cool! It's Michael Bay doing Michael Bay things and the plot seems...really really unnecessarily complicated and it stars Jake Gyllenhaal and Yahya Abdul-Mateen II who I am so happy is becoming a buzzy actor after being by far the best part of Aquaman (2018). The Matrix Resurrections (2021) was terrible, but whatever, he was charming in it. This looks like the kind of original bombastic action film that was popular in the 90s. I am just very game for it. I wish it had a more distinctive title, though. Google is going to think I'm in sincere medical trouble when I keep searching for Ambulance.

Jackass Forever

February 4, 2022

Ahhh February 4th Jackass and Moonfall, eh? Sounds like a pretty sweet double feature to me! I am an unashamed Jackass fan and have been for twenty years now. It definitely fits into early 2000s nostalgia which is creepily peaking its head around our corner. I am a little curious if this is going to be any good. Surely these movies work because of the camaraderie of the cast and the outrageousness of the stunts, but everyone is like, well, WELL past their prime. Is it as fun to watch a bunch of 50 year old dudes goof on each other? It's also had its share of production woes, mostly centering around Bam Margera, who couldn't stay sober on set, but is now suing Paramount saying that was a ridiculous contract he had to sign that would force him to stay sober. It's a mess. I'm cool with Bam's absence, we don't need pranks on Granny April in 2022. But it does seem like it's a bullshit move on Paramount's part. I don't know, I really want to see this, I laughed harder at this trailer than half of the movies that came out last year.

The Northman

April 22nd, 2022

Robert Eggers is 2/2 with The VVitch (2015) and The Lighthouse (2019) and he's now combing those casts (at least Anna Taylor-Joy and Willem Dafoe) with Alex Skarsgard, Nicole Kidman, and Ethan Hawke into a movie about Viking revenge. There are three distinct badass moments in this trailer - the arrow to the king, catching the spear, and just jumping off a roof without a cut that are really spectacular. It looks clear and coherent with a simple narrative, but Eggers is just a master of metaphor and visual language. In his other works there's so much else going on and I am very excited to see what he does here.

Across the Spider-Verse Part 1

October 7th, 2022

Okay! Number one hyped movie of the year comes with some serious caveats. First, the directing team is totally different. Now, on Into the Spider-Verse (2018) we really just had a directing team from SONY Animation, including two first-time directors, so that shouldn't really be that jarring. The writing team is mostly intact (Phil Lord actually adds Chris Miller, who I didn't realize was absent from the first one) as is the production team.

The problem comes with the hype. Into the Spider-Verse was so stupid good that it's going to be hard to top. Making another movie in this sub-series a Spider-Verse film seems to be limiting Miles Morales to multi-verse stories, which also seems like a creative misfire without the impetus and originality from the first film. The big question is that facing all sequels - can lightning strike twice and can this film be as exciting, dynamic, fresh, and interesting as the first one? Especially when it's "Big Brother" live action No Way Home (2021) just basically did the same thing? It's as if this is the only story we have to tell about Spider-Man anymore (don't get twisted, this same thing has also happened in comics. And the 90s animated TV show).

Now - to be fair, this is all conjecture. We don't know anything about the plot except that there is some multi-dimensional traveling again and somehow Spider-Man 2099 is involved. And that's pretty much why this is still the #1 hype machine. First - the first film was THAT good and for as edge and 90s as it is, Spider-Man 2099 is just so damn cool. I'd like a whole movie set in Nueva York and figuring that out. Superhero sequels are generally good. They get passed all that baggage required from an origin story. Think Spider-Man 2 (2004), The Dark Knight (2008), The Winter Solider (2014), or even Superman II (1980)! But it could also be like Iron Man 2 (2010) or THOR: The Dark World (2013). We just don't know, but this hype train is rolling.

Other Crap

Okay, fine, so we had a superhero movie in there. And yeah, some big blockbuster type sequels. Should we be pumped for The Batman (2022)? I mean, I definitely am, but hesitant when they just keep saying that it's better than Batman Begins (2005). Not that I think the latter is sacrosanct, just that it feels like a trick you pull when you know your film sucks. Seriously, James Cameron tried to put his weight behind Dark Fate (2019), you can't really trust these people.

Anyway, Love & Thunder, Multiverse of Madness, Wakanda Forever, Aquaman and the Lost City of Gold, I dunno. I liked all these series. I just have a more warry eye. I'm assuredly not pumped for Lightyear, which still looks like a parody or Morbius, which exists for reasons I don't understand. I will believe The Flash is a movie that exists when I see it in theaters. Probably towards the end of the movie. Same with AVABAR 2. How did this sequel series get so blocked up, it's maddening. No one cares about AVABAR anymore.

Black Adam is interesting. The Rock is inspired, but like, this dude is a sincere villain, are they going to make him fight Zachary Levi? I feel like they will Venom-ify it and render him toothless. But it could be cool! Oh, sweet sweet razorcakes.

The last films I'm cautiously optimistic about are The 355 and Turning Red. The former has an interesting premise of women from various international spy agencies teaming up, but the trailer didn't really look all that catchy. Turning Red is a Pixar movie about a girl who turns into a giant red panda when she's flustered. Again, seems like an outstanding premise, but I wasn't all that impressed by the trailer that didn't necessarily push that premise into interesting territory. Oh well, could be cool, might suck, this is the world we live in.

What do you think?! What's your hype?! All MCU? Sound off!

First Impressions: Zack Snyder's Justice League

We are fast arriving at an era where we sorta need to move on from reserving our Impressions reviews only for movies seen in the theater. The last movie I saw in the theater is still Rise of Skywalker (2019). Ugh, kill me. Thanks to HBOMax, which I am 100% on board with right now, we are getting a steady stream of dumb action comic book movies, so I'm game. Let's start this party with Zack Snyder's Justice League (2021), which is in a world all on its own and perhaps becoming one of the more famous "re-dos" in cinema history. SPOILERS I guess, kind of for this movie that's like four years old but also brand new?

Chill, man! It's not that artistic!

Re-reading my initial impressions of Justice League (2017), it's amazing how much a few things stick out. First is just how snarky I was. Maybe I still am? But that movie just had so, so, so much baggage. The news at the time was more about Snyder leaving due to an imaginable family tragedy, Joss Whedon entering to lighten everything up, and Henry Cavill's CGI de-moustaching. With four years of hindsight it's clear that Snyder was very much forced off the project, Whedon was a horribly misguided choice, and the moustache thing wasn't all that big of a deal.

Let's just dive into this, which is what everyone wants to hear - how did this thing come about, was it worth it, and what is really different? I will reiterate that it is a true miracle that Snyder got the opportunity to get back in there and indulge everything he wanted to ever do, but it's also very much a product of a different world. As I mentioned in 2017, Justice League was just chasing Marvel. Amidst a great year for superhero movies, the biggest DCEU team-up event was an afterthought. In the years since, they've somewhat righted the ship with Aquaman (2018) and SHAZAM (2019) being pretty good and Bird of Prey (2020) and Wonder Woman 1984 (2020) being pretty okay. They're all better than Snyder's early efforts, which are truly, truly awful.

With this big negative wave it wasn't that crazy to bring Whedon on to the project. At the time Snyder was seen as this dour, pretentious, and self-serious auteur, which is all the more insane because his movies are completely bonkers and could be successful if they took themselves less seriously. Whedon was coming off of The Avengers (2012) and appeared as this superhero wunderkind, but really we should have been wise to the cracks in his armor. In the past four years his career has fallen hard, mostly because the man who we all thought could write strong female characters hasn't held up under scrutiny. The jokes that worked in Avengers also feel so cringey in Justice League. There are plenty of possible reasons why - they didn't mesh with Snyder's script, they're forced in general, the cast wasn't on board, or maybe Whedon was never really that great to begin with.

I will gladly hop on the "never liked Whedon" train. I never watched Buffy or Firefly. I don't know why neither of those shows ever really appealed to me. I was probably too young to buy into Buffy initially and now I'm too old. I did watch a little Firefly, but I can't remember a thing beyond Nathan Fillion and Alan Tudyk being in it. He was always praised for his writing, but nothing ever stood out to me as that clever or ground-breaking. I really liked Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog (2008) and The Cabin in the Woods (2012), both of which I DO think are clever and ground-breaking, though.

All this set up The Avengers, which looking back on it, was such the most mass-marketed appealing and safest movie ever. That's not totally a criticism, I mean, it's literally the point of these movies. But the jokes are broad, the action is broad, the themes are broad, and it's shot like a TV show. When these elements were brought to Justice League and mixed in with a very distinct vision, which we see now, it's no wonder this movie was really really bad when it came out. There just isn't clarity of purpose or motivation, shots are compromised or flat due to lighting changes that don't match set and costume design, and there's a general lighter tone that dilutes the stakes. The Avengers still had an epic feel, Justice League just feels like warm mush.

So, that movie came out, it was a mess, people forgot about it, and we moved on with our lives. But thank you Internet Trolls for screaming for the fabled "Snyder Cut" for years. There is a lot of nasty context here, Snyder appeals to that Internet Bro crowd that likes carrying tiki torches and has nothing better to do on January 6th. It's all kind of Fountainhead, superheroes are inherent gods and better people kind of stuff. Yeah, he made Watchmen (2009) but without a ton of Alan Moore's self awareness about these topics. Whedon isn't quite there but he does exhibit the other side of the coin with male gaze, playful sexual harassment jokes, and that kind of "I'm an ally, why won't you sleep with me!?" type of male thinking. I know this is a really hot take, folks - all of Hollywood might be sexist.

There is a degree of problematic thinking then, went Internet bros complain and then get what they want. But IS it that bad when the Snyder Cut is actually this good. That's right. I really actually enjoyed the hell out of this movie. After years of whining, a pandemic where we had nothing else to do but watch directors re-edit old movies and launch fledgling streaming services like HBOMax, the Snyder Cut was the perfect big blockbuster, new but sort of also old, a sure novelty to peak interest, but also a tremendous showcase for think pieces like this to get the Internet buzz in full swing in a world still taking a big breath after a dearth of Marvel films. Everything just aligned with this one.

This film is undeniably better than Justice League. It has far more context, a more coherent, unrushed story, an epic scope, and actually a whole ton of fun. I don't know what would have happened if this had come out in 2017, all four hours of it. I watched it, but I will admit that my joy was fueled in part by my ability to take bathroom breaks, make dinner halfway through, pause to watch some NCAA March Madness, and then finish it up. I will say that somehow it is actually one of the fastest four hours I've spent watching a movie.

It's helped by breaking up the film into many smaller character moments and origins, and this is a good and bad thing. Newly introduced characters like Flash and Cyborg could have used their own lead-up films, but quite honestly, we know enough about Flash from the CW show, and this movie serves as a pretty good Cyborg origin. We're probably okay. Aquaman has the deepest, wettest backstory, and it's fairly incomprehensible in Whedon's cut. His own solo adventure as well as more context here is very helpful. It's important to remember that people will sit through four hours of movie, they just won't sit through four hours of bad movie. I made a note of the time stamp - Batman shows up in costume for teh first time around two hours in, which is about the time that Justice League ended.

This all helps it just become epic. No one would pay attention to the Lord of the Rings if it were a crisp 90 minutes. It's supposed to be an investment. Now, that investment only works when the story isn't stretched thin (sorry, Hobbit movies), but a film like this, that was supposed to stand against Avengers movies, needs to feel a little more substantial.

The other benefits of more time to breathe and more context include the villain, Steppenwolf, who is more suitably treated as the middle-management tool that he is. He's not a very good villain, but that's the point. He's a groveling sycophant, and how he cowers to Darkseid is supposed to indicate how badass the REAL villain actually is. It was great actually understanding his motivation as atonement for some blunder in the past. Now, Darkseid's general "conquering worlds" is as cliche as they come - getting into the Anti-Life Equation is a little it more nuanced, but it's basically the same thing. It's not quite as catchy as an Infinity Stone, is it?

Ohhhh, you know I've got to compare this to Marvel, I mean, that's the whole point, right? I mean, this isn't new. Steppenwolf is still a villain without much connection to the main heroes, at least until he kills Cyborg's dad, but that's also sort of the point. He just exists until Wonder Woman cuts his head off, and then no one cares that he's dead. However, he's still a huge threat that no one can beat.

Except Superman! And I will tell you, we all thought Whedon's interpretation via Cavill in Justice League was the one great thing about that movie, but he's actually just so fantastic here. Justice League was all about, "Well, we formed this team but we suck, so we need to bring Superman back." The Snyder Cut is still about that, but it's subtler and forming the team is still the first priority. Bringing Superman back is more an organic development as they explore the possibilities of the Mother Box.

Now, the core conceit is still shaky, but that's not this movie's fault. That would be the fault of Snyder's other two movies. First, Pa Kent's whole "Don't save people" schtick, which makes no sense any way we've thought about it in the past eight years now, then the fact that Superman was a huge jerk, and then they made a whole movie called Batman v. Superman (2016) which was ABOUT how no one is really into Superman. Now we regret him when he's dead. He just wasn't around enough to be honored by the world the way this film honors him. Also, all tension is removed both from the first few scenes here and retroactively BVS because you just know he's coming back. Like, Death is usually a joke in comics, but it's egregious here. It's tough to get past this, because it's literally what is kicking off this movie, but once you start rolling it's fun.

Everyone else gets a little moment. Aquaman has Norwegian people sing about him, which is the most cuttable scene in cinema history. Go Zack, go! The Flash saves a girl and hotdogs from a car crash. It is a little creepy, but I didn't think it was horribly so. Cyborg gets a ton to do, from manipulating the global economy through digging holes via punches, which is also so Snyder. No, the most Snyder thing is literally playing "Hallelujah" over the credits. I can't believe he did that again. Actually I mostly can't believe that it works and was an emotionally apt choice in that moment. I still laughed out loud.

But I will give this guy some credit! The Wonder Woman bank robbery scene I expected to be in slow motion but there was actually a lot of fast motion! They really showed off her strength and speed, which we hardly ever get to see. She also definitely destroyed that whole room unnecessarily, but whatever. It was a lot of fun, and maybe the best action scene of the movie as she deflects a whole automatic rifle's magazine from killing innocent bank people.

I love that J.K. Simmons got jacked for this role. Do you remember that? Or maybe he's just a gym rat actually. But he's in this for a split second and does not need to be. This movie is full of that. Willem Dafoe! Billy Crudup! Robin Wright! Zeus! I mean, cool I guess. Ben Affleck is fine, again, his character arc is just in a weird place because of how insane he was in BVS. We never knew what we were missing with consistent characterization, though. I forgot just how bad and out of place some of these Whedon jokes were. It is true that he doesn't have a ton to do besides be rich. Other stories tend to find a way for him to do something cool. He could surely do something here besides fire laser guns.

Anyway, the ending is a whole lot better. The heroes actually have a plan, each has a role and gets a cool set piece. And then they actually lose! I wonder if that was before or after Infinity War (2018). I guess it had to be before, right? I don't think Snyder actually wrote or filmed too many new scenes (oh, but we'll get to THOSE in a second). But surely the heroes losing and then going back in time is a little too coincidental to do twice, right? The Flash does this a whole lot easier than Ant-Man, though. He just kind of runs. It is a really cool scene, not trying to hate, and there is a ton of precedent in comics. For the record, when watching it, it didn't feel like a rip-off.

So let's get into this desert crap. I don't think it works at all. End the damn movie with the team on top of Chernobyl or whatever. Beyond the awkwardness of Jared Leto in general, his Joker really just doesn't work. I don't know why his vulgarity is so off-putting. It shouldn't be, it's the Joker. Maybe it's just the delivery, which is devoid of nuance, implication, or comic timing. The Joker is best when he's actually witty. It's also really hard to believe that Batman and Joker would ever team up for any reason. This might be more on the Joker's side - he's not working with anyone. The whole thing is also a shitty tease for something we're never going to see. I don't quite understand why it's in here.

Mroe like DORKseid LOL

Snyder's future plans seem pretty out there. I'm not sure Batman and Lois would have worked, but someone like the Joker killing Lois to send Superman over the edge makes sense. Hmmm... Evil Superman is fun, but it's also something that's been done a lot before. Including like...in this movie. Also in The Boys. And Brightburn (2019). We can't really complain about something that we haven't seen yet and also never will, but I'm maybe grateful we missed out. I'd still like to see the League go up against Darkseid. We've gotten so many good animated stories at this point, including the recently great Justice League Dark: Apokolips War (2020). I don't know why "What if Superman but Evil" feels played out but "Fight Darkseid Planet" doesn't, as I am realizing I can't logic my way out of this. Literally the point of oversaturation feeds one idea and drowns the other. I want Darkseid, get Michael Ironside to play him and be done with it.

Martian Manhunter has no role in this movie. Him impersonating Martha Kent has all sorts of horrible fridge logic and looking back, if he was the General this whole time, that doesn't really add anything because we don't know what he's working towards. Maybe if he actually showed up and fought somebody. Morphed into a dragon or something. He's so weird. Also, his codename is so awkward, there is a reason why even Justice League Unlimited always called him J'onn J'onzz instead.

Wrapping up, there is a lot of slow mo and epic treatment of innocuous scenes, most notably Aquaman walking into the ocean, but this is Snyder we're talking about. That's going to happen. There is a little more blood and two fun fuck words to give us an R-rating for some reason. The plot still pretty much doesn't make sense, but it's fine when it gets rolling. Most of all, this is a really enjoyable movie. Motivations are more clear, characters have more weight, and despite telling like five stories at once, it actually does all feel pretty balanced and never bloated. It's indulgent as all hell, but never bloated. Except for that Norwegian Song. They need a little morning wood! I really liked this, I would watch it again, and that's so much more than I can say for a lot of other movies these days.

I hate what this implies. No, we should not get the Ayer cut of Suicide Squad (2017). It's already weird enough we're getting another redo chance there this year. I don't think it's very fair that studios can screw up big time and then just make another movie. But it's also like, ugh, these films are so clearly better. Just get it right the first time! This isn't totally without precedent. Just look at the hundred versions of Blade Runner (1982) or Apocalypse Now (1979) or every single Terry Gilliam movie ever made. It's weird that nothing will really come of this and the DCEU is largely moving on from its key components and just doing whatever it wants. I suppose that's fine, but Joker (2019) was still not very good.

Now for Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)...

They Say Hindsight is OSCAR 2020 LIVE blog!

Okay people - I do not own a television so basing this off Twitter. This should work out fine. I always have terrible predictions so I went really off the rocker with a few of these categories this year. That should work out, right?! I think JoJo Rabbit (2019) is winning screenplay instead of The Irishman. Official predictions remain solid, but I think that will happen now and I wanted to say it. I will definitely get all of the shorts categories right, though.

Stay tuned for updates all night and we'll see how I do!

Supporting Actor:

Tom Hanks, A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood
Anthony Hopkins, The Two Popes
Al Pacino, The Irishman
Joe Pesci, The Irishman
Brad Pitt, Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood

Official Prediction: Brad Pitt
Offical Winner: BRAD PITT!

Okay, this was an admittedly easy one to start off with, but it's still exciting. Yeah, yeah, Pitt has an Oscar for producing 12 Years a Slave (2013) and all that, but this definitely feels like a good capper for him. It's exciting. He's had a fantastic career and continually commits to smaller, independent films and roles while being in a position where he could have been Tom Cruise and made six Fight Club (1999) sequels if he wanted to. The only comic book movie he's appeared in is Vanisher in Deadpool 2 (2018). This is a good award.


Score: 1/1

Animated Feature:

How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World, Dean DeBlois
I Lost My Body, Jeremy Clapin
Klaus, Sergio Pablos
Missing Link, Chris Butler
Toy Story 4,  Josh Cooley

Official Prediction: Missing Link
Official Winner: Toy Story 4

I hate to say that I'm so done with Pixar. The magic at this point is long gone and I'm over it. I maybe could have predicted this but thought I saw some cracks with Toy Story 4 not really dominating precursors, but it's by far the most recognizable nominee here, and a lot of times that's all it takes. Can't wait for Toy Story 5 to win in six years.

Score: 1/2

Animated Short:

“Dcera”, Daria Kashcheeva
“Hair Love”, Matthew A. Cherry
“Kitbull”, Rosana Sullivan
“Memorable”, Bruno Collet
“Sister”, Siqi Song

Official Prediction: "Hair Love"
Official Winner: "Hair Love"

Haha, I miss Animated Feature but got Animated Short. Damn straight. This was definitely the cutest nominee and I'm glad that was enough. This is huge for my predictions. Too bad Sisqo didn't win.

Score: 2/3

Original Screenplay:

Knives Out, Rian Johnson
Marriage Story, Noah Baumbach
1917, Sam Mendes and Krysty Wilson-Cairns
Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood, Quentin Tarantino
Parasite, Bong Joon-ho, Jin Won Han

Official Prediction: OUATIH
Offical Winner: Parasite

This is...an interesting development. Parasite was favored to win a few categories but this was not one of them. This doesn't bode that well for Tarantino, unless it's a consolation prize and it can surge somewhere else. Might this be a big night for Bong Joon-ho? Three writing awards for Q is probably a little much.

Score: 2/4

Adapted Screenplay:

The Irishman, Steven Zaillian
Jojo Rabbit, Taika Waititi
Joker, Todd Phillips, Scott Silver
Little Women, Greta Gerwig
The Two Popes, Anthony McCarten

Official Prediction: The Irishman
Official Winner: Jojo Rabbit

See above. Screw my life. Great win, this makes me feel a lot more happy than my prediction. I still count this against me. The Irishman will likely officially win nothing and I might say this will be it for Jojo Rabbit, but we could see - it seems to be surging lately. My score is terrible.

Score: 2/5

Best Live Action Short Film:

“Brotherhood,” Meryam Joobeur
“Nefta Football Club,” Yves Piat
“The Neighbors’ Window,” Marshall Curry
“Saria,” Bryan Buckley
“A Sister,” Delphine Girard

Official Prediction: "Nefta Football Club"
Official Winner: “The Neighbors’ Window”

I actually watched both of these, "Neighbors' Window" was lame as hell. Whatever. These are typically a crapshoot. Good to get my boffs out early. Maybe. I am way down, folks. Please no upsets. This is terrible.

Score: 2/6

Costume Design:

The Irishman, Sandy Powell, Christopher Peterson
Jojo Rabbit, Mayes C. Rubeo
Joker, Mark Bridges
Little Women, Jacqueline Durran
Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood, Arianne Phillips

Official Prediction: OUATIH
Official Winner: Little Women

Are you telling me that the kind of movie that always wins this category actually won this category!? And that I should have predicted one of the easiest categories of the night?! Oh, whatever. This is already turning into an awful night for me. Well deserved, though. We knew this would happen. I am mathematically eliminated from tying my best prediction night, so...good.

Score: 2/7

Best Documentary Feature:

American Factory, Julia Rieichert, Steven Bognar
The Cave, Feras Fayyad
The Edge of Democracy, Petra Costa
For Sama, Waad Al-Kateab, Edward Watts
Honeyland, Tamara Kotevska, Ljubo Stefanov

Official Prediction: American Factory
Official Winner: American Factory

I just watched this! Good win, this was a really interesting doc and most importantly, is the first step towards saving my night. In hindsight this had a lot of backing behind it - I did NOT realize the Obamas had a hand in this until this morning. See, my prediction is even better. I never get anything wrong.

Score: 3/8

Best Documentary Short Subject:

“In the Absence,” Yi Seung-Jun and Gary Byung-Seok Kam
“Learning to Skateboard in a Warzone,” Carol Dysinger
“Life Overtakes Me,” Kristine Samuelson and John Haptas
“St. Louis Superman,” Smriti Mundhra and Sami Khan
“Walk Run Cha-Cha,” Laura Nix

Official Prediction: “Learning to Skateboard in a Warzone"
Official Winner: “Learning to Skateboard in a Warzone"

Yay! This was a great documentary, fantastic job fighting off "Walk Run Cha-Cha"! Yes, I got into that rivalry. I am doing a great job of nailing some difficult categories and blowing the easy ones. Let's keep this streak alive.

Score: 4/9

Supporting Actress:

Kathy Bates, Richard Jewell
Laura Dern, Marriage Story
Scarlett Johansson, Jojo Rabbit
Florence Pugh, Little Women
Margot Robbie, Bombshell

Official Prediction: Laura Dern

Official Winner: Laura Dern

Thank goodness for these non-existent races this year. Laura Dern is the kind of actress that you think about and think, "She has an Oscar, right?" NOW SHE DOES! She was also 26 years old in Jurassic Park (1993). This is a great win for an actress who seems like she's only built a career in Indie films but has also been in some of the biggest movies of all time and just always puts in consistent work. She's also in a ton of movies lately. This is another great win.

Score: 5/10

Sound Editing:

Ford v Ferrari, Don Sylvester
Joker, Alan Robert Murray
1917, Oliver Tarney, Rachel Tate
Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood, Wylie Stateman
Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Matthew Wood, David Acord

Official Prediction: 1917
Official Winner: Ford v Ferrari

This is a significant dent in 1917's Best Picture campaign, but not a death knell. Ford v Ferrari seemed underrated going into this night as a movie that did reasonably well, had reasonably good critical reception, and a general public liking. It didn't set anything on fire, but DID have race cars. Good for sound I guess. This category really loves war pictures, this win will make future predictions such a pain in the ass.

Score: 5/11

Sound Mixing:

Ad Astra
Ford v Ferrari
Joker
1917
Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood

Official Prediction: 1917

Official Winner: 1917

Well, look at that. This category split, and we got it. I wonder when these categories will merge, even though they're totally different skills. Best Sound has a good ring to it, though, don't it? At this rate I'm on pace to shoot right down the middle and tie my all-time worst. Magical night.

Score: 6/12

Film Editing:

Ford v. Ferrari, Michael McCusker, Andrew Buckland
The Irishman, Thelma Schoonmaker
Jojo Rabbit, Tom Eagles
Joker, Jeff Groth
Parasite, Jinmo Yang

Official Prediction: Parasite
Official Winner: Ford v. Ferrari

WHAT IS HAPPENING? Screw everybody. I don't know what this means for Parasite. Where is Ford v. Ferrari coming from to ruin everybody's party? Maybe this doesn't mean a whole lot, it's just splitting a lot of categories the big pictures were supposed to sweep. And my predictions are so terrible.

Score: 6/13

Visual Effects:

Avengers Endgame
The Irishman
1917
The Lion King
Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

Official Prediction: Endgame
Official Winner: 1917

Unreal. I might have picked this as the least likely to win this category. The Academy seems really adverse to big blockbusters in this category for some reason. For a while this was at least the consolation category. How does Endgame not win this? That was a legitimate landmark movie for its effect work. Maybe folks don't want to admit that's the future of filmmaking. Does this push 1917 in better position for Best Picture? Or is it just the only film in this category folks would vote for?

Score: 6/14

Makeup and Hair:

Bombshell
Joker
Judy
Maleficent: Mistress of Evil
1917

Official Prediction: Bombshell

Official Winner: Bombshell

Good win, following all protocol and precedent. I remember this happening every year. I always get so desperate to get back on track. I think I'm on lock for at least four more. I've never gotten less than 50% but it's possible this year. Yay.

Score: 7/15

Best International Feature Film:

Corpus Christi, Jan Komasa
Honeyland, Tamara Kotevska, Ljubo Stefanov
Les Miserables, Ladj Ly
Pain and Glory, Pedro Almodovar
Parasite, Bong Joon Ho

Official Prediction: Parasite

Official Winner: Parasite

Perhaps the biggest lock category in modern times. This helps. We knew this would happen - the question is, can Parasite keep winning categories typically foreign to foreign films?

Score: 8/16

Cinematography:

The Irishman, Rodrigo Prieto
Joker, Lawrence Sher
The Lighthouse, Jarin Blaschke
1917, Roger Deakins
Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood, Robert Richardson

Official Prediction: 1917

Official Winner: 1917

Deserved because the Academy loves Oners even though this totally should have been The Lighthouse. In fact the Film Independent Spirit Awards should just be the Oscars. Anyway, Deakins is deserved here, and even though his Blade Runner 2049 (2017) made up a little for decades of snubs, he could just win every cinematography award from here until he dies and it wouldn't be enough.

Score: 9/17

Original Score:

Joker, Hildur Guðnadóttir
Little Women, Alexandre Desplat
Marriage Story, Randy Newman
1917, Thomas Newman
Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, John Williams

Official Prediction: 1917
Official Winner: Joker

Yeah, yeah, I know. Everyone else and their mother predicted Joker for this. I didn't. I was wrong. Dud. I should have more wins than I currently do. Solid gold predictions have been wrong before! 1917 isn't quite clicking, but I probably shouldn't have counted Joker out from anything. Yeah, I did, fuck Joker.

Score: 9/18

Original Song:

“I Can’t Let You Throw Yourself Away,” Toy Story 4
“I’m Gonna Love Me Again,” Rocketman
“I’m Standing With You,” Breakthrough
“Into the Unknown,” Frozen 2
“Stand Up,” Harriet

Official Prediction: Rocketman
Official Winner: Rocketman

This seemed like a shoe-in and so I actually predicted it. Look at me! Was Rocketman actually good? I should get at least two more categories right and at least tie my worst ever effort at this.

Score: 10/19

Director:

Martin Scorsese, The Irishman
Todd Phillips, Joker
Sam Mendes, 1917
Quentin Tarantino, Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood
Bong Joon Ho, Parasite

Official Prediction: Tarantino
Official Winner: Bong

I can't believe that Tarantino leaves empty handed. What does he gotta do to get his hands on this statue? Don't get me wrong, this win is huge and well-deserved. While this seemed for a long time like it would mean Parasite is in charge of Best Picture, it's more common to now proclaim a split. Does 1917 have a chance?! Or will the Academy honor Tarantino after all and award BP to OUATIH? Ugh this ceremony.

Score: 10/20

Production Design:

The Irishman, Bob Shaw and Regina Graves
Jojo Rabbit, Ra Vincent and Nora Sopkova
1917, Dennis Gassner and Lee Sandales
Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood, Barbara Ling and Nancy Haigh
Parasite, Lee Ha-Jun and Cho Won Woo, Han Ga Ram, and Cho Hee

Official Prediction: OUATIH

Official Winner: OUATIH

Okay, I admit, I feel asleep on this one and totally missed the Twitter notification. I was kind of wondering why they were taking so long with Production Design. Like, saving it until after Best Director? Anyway, well deserved here, and boosts my tally. Cheers all around.

Score: 11/21

Lead Actor:

Antonio Banderas, Pain and Glory
Leonardo DiCaprio, Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood
Adam Driver, Marriage Story
Joaquin Phoenix, Joker
Jonathan Pryce, The Two Popes

Official Prediction: Joaquin Phoenix
Official Winner: Joaquin Phoenix

Listen, I love Joaquin, he's one of my favorite all time actors. I love how much he doesn't give a crap about being famous, how insanely he throws himself into roles and how much he eschews his own regard for his reputation. But Joker wasn't great, and he's not great in it. I said it. It's great that he has a second Oscar, he joins rarefied but deserved company. This is the second Oscar someone's gotten for playing the Joker, which is really bizarre and a little unsettling. Still, obvious pick and I've tied my all-time low, guaranteeing I don't do worse. Yay.

Score: 12/22

Lead Actress:

Cynthia Erivo, Harriet
Scarlett Johansson, Marriage Story
Saoirse Ronan, Little Women
Charlize Theron, Bombshell
Renee Zellweger, Judy

Official Prediction: Renee Zellweger
Official Winner: Renee Zellweger

It occurs to me that the CATS (2019) post I also wrote tonight simultaneously while writing this post was technically published afterwards, all these are just edits, so it will be pinned to the top. All things as they should be. I don't think anyone cared about Judy and her momentum was always kind of weird, and she already has an Oscar, and hasn't been relevant for a while, so this is fine. Predictable, fine, I get a point.

Score: 13/23

Best Picture:

Ford v Ferrari
The Irishman
Jojo Rabbit
Joker
Little Women
Marriage Story
1917
Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood
Parasite

Official Prediction: 1917
Official Winner: Parasite

So, the streak continues! I haven't correctly picked a Best Picture winner since 2013. Why are any of you still checking in on this blog? I've hit 13 correct predictions four times in the past six years, three times in the past four years, and twice in the past two years! This is pretty bad! I think I cold have easily squeezed out three, probably four more correct picks from Jojo, Little Women, Toy Story 4, and Joker's score. I should have known better. I feel like when I think I know better I fall on my face anyway. The face of depression. But a lot of this Ford v. Ferrari crap no one saw coming. Oh well. That's a wrap on 2020 Oscar season.

Past years:

2010: 12/24
2011: 14/24
2012: 16/24
2013: 14/24
2014: 20/24
2015: 13/24
2016: 14/24
2017: 13/24
2018: 16/24
2019: 13/24
2020: 13/24