>>34541832
lol if you're saying you actually sit down and listen to music (while doing nothing else, just listening) for 5+ hours daily, yeah sure that's kind of a problem
otherwise, most people clock a lot more than 5 hours everyday via casually listening (i.e. when driving, taking the bus, studying, etc)

>>34541964
yes thats what i am saying

>>34541937
i dont need dopamije detox, i need MDD and Music addiction detox

>>34541973
Well then stick with your plan of 100 days with no music. That sounds like a good idea. Good luck.

>>34541973
what's mdd
also it sounds like you have a plan. what's the point of this thread?

>>34541615
>How do you even solve this mess.
Stop thinking about it since that just makes it worse, forgive yourself so you can be okay with being a loser forever, and just do more stuff like >>34541707 said.

>>34541707
I have a full a5 notebook filled with exactly this, literally you'd find a date, then what you said repeated in different phrasing. But My previous attempts were based on my VN, so they never succeeded. Like I mentioned, just recently that I got this consciousness about my problem.

Now I might talk with you with consciousness, but every time when it's triggered I will just lose my mind completely and panic, and return into pathetic unrealism.

It's a mind problem, and it should be solved in the mind. Think of it like an automaton, based on the input I get from my senses, I will get the same output, I can fight it, I can force the input streamed into my brain to a specific route, but naturally it will not. And I can only force it for a time.

My solution should be aimed at reforming the mind. Something that can recreate me, like a late childhood but I'll be my parent. To reform the automaton of the brain, so I can think realistically.

That might be by interaction with the real world more and more, but without listening to my VN automaton, because I'm sure I can critically think and know the truth from the false. Now I have more humility knowing I'm kind of a retard, that will help. So in the end something like you mentioned. Only deformation of the current self can let me reform it. Maybe the solution to VN is to admit you're just an emotionally abused retard, kek. And I'm still really young so I have time, I'm almost 19, but mentally I'm like 16.

Thank you for the reply.

>>34541883
>But My previous attempts were based on my VN, so they never succeeded.
In this case, this is a good result. The goal is to let go of success, begin to seek failure by accident. It's a paradox, you see. You say you were unsuccessful, yet admitting this is a marker for success. Confusing yes, but from the outside we can say it is progress precisely because you can acknowledge failure. Keep going.

>I got this consciousness about my problem.
Yes. And the way to gain more is to allow reality to give you more. Do not think you can grant it to yourself, reality outside of your perception gives you it. Think of consciousness as a beam of light pouring through the crack of a cave wall. The way to get more is let reality smash your life with a hammer. More of the stone mind prison breaks, more light is allowed in, more consciousness. Experience is the name of the game, experiencing the outside to shape your inside.

>It's a mind problem, and it should be solved in the mind
It's a fire problem and it should be solved with fire. It's a flood, it should be solved with more water. It's dust in the eyes, it should be solved with more dust in the eyes. Notice how this doesn't make sense? It's because it cannot make sense. The way to solve the mind's problems is with the body. The way to solve the bodies problems is with the mind. Mind/Body relationship is what needs to be harmonized my friend.

Thinkers always wondered the mind/body knot dilemma:
Does the mind rule the body?
Or does the body rule the mind?

The answer is neither. The mind and body are one. Interconnected and reciprocated in function, the left foot to a right foot, the left eye to a right eye. Like a figure 8, interlocking and in complete repeating unison.

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>>34541925
Ok, thank you, I will give up my ego and self, and embrace the truth for itself. I will not live inside the cave fearing the frighting outside and the light of the sun that burns my weak skin that got used to the darkness of the cave. In it I sought comfort, but only found more misery. By abandoning the self I can be one with nature, one with the truth, one with God.

Nothing good can come from who I am, because I am the problem. Maybe I will seek a route similar to Buddha into enlightenment.

>>34541966
That's the spirit. Nothing good can come from who you are, but nothing bad can come from it either. The 'self' you currently have is what is called as a 'false-self'. Your actual self is what you get to meet later, or rather what you remember. For example my false self was a grandiose seeking pseudo-intellectual who genuinely believed himself possessing special intelligence (all I was doing was thinking lol. That's how delusional I was.) In actuality my real self was simply a scared shitless kid full of anger and shame, a little bitch who wanted to be a man but didn't know how so deigned to fake it all to himself to cope. And the longer this illusion went on, the more permanent the 'false-self' became, the more terrifying the idea of killing the false self became because it would feel like psychological suicide. And it was, that what it took. But the painful part wasn't breaking and shedding the false self.

The painful part was realizing and accepting that the whole charade was for nothing. That none of my mental delusions were real or had merit. Nothing I ever thought of or ruminated on ever shaped reality or even gained for myself any knowledge or wisdom. It was all for nothing and effectively, 28 years of my life was unlived, lost to dissociation, devoured by brain fog. And what was left was someone who hadn't matured past the age of 12 in an adults body.

If that's enlightenment then it's a brutal one. But it's worthwhile because once you let the scared and ashamed kid inside take the front seat of your life, you can actually grow. And it takes lots of pain and failure, but it's doable.

Good luck brotha.

>>34541280
no
>>34541777
They aren't in my house, I live in the country, small town. Nothing to do here. I give up.

>>34540390
+1. This shit is impossible. Should I gaslight myself into wanting casual sex instead of a relationship?

>>34526227
I went to a friends bonfire yesterday
>bitches were there
>some I knew and some I didnt,
>talked to all of them at one point

Its not that hard man.

>>34541826
>I live in the country, small town

Then live somewhere else.
>>34541880
A lot of guys struggling either never leave their house or get hit with the inevitable "you're nice, but..." when they "confess" to their lady of choice. Because they think that "confessing" is how it works even after third grade.

>>34541880
did your friend invite you to the bonfire? how did you meet them initially?

>>34541852
People who get cheated on are victims. What are you talking about.

>>34541918
>People who get cheated on are victims. What are you talking about.
No they're not, and I'm saying that as someone who got cheated on before in my youth. Being stabbed makes you a victim. Having your home invaded and looted makes you a victim. Getting your head caved in with a hammer makes you a victim. Getting robbed at gunpoint for your money makes you a victim.

Getting your feelings hurt over a stupid cunt who can't commit does not make you a victim, it makes the cheater a cunt who should be dumped. That's not victimhood that's just pest control, same way as you remove a infestation of cockroaches from your home, you dump the cheater and clean up your life from trash. No one with a home infestation calls themselves a victim over it. People who get cheated shouldn't call themselves victims either, give me a break. Just remove the social parasite (the cheater) from your life and move on with life

>>34541852
anon she probably wasnt lying you're taking this way too personally. OPs girlfriend is getting screwed over by OP

>>34541971
I'm taking OP's face value observation and simply running with it. According to him it's a girl who (repeatedly) gets ass grabbed in public, is magically 'molested' every single outing she has without OP around. And to anyone with a brain that spells "Cheater". Because in real life, real rapes and sexual assaults don't happen abruptly and spontaneously and repetitively like that. I also happen to have experience with two exes who were serial cheaters, who would lie about being abused or bad touched to cover their asses when ever they were caught.

>>34541960
No, it is victimizing you. It is a betrayal that is a form of abuse. The betrayal trauma is not a figment of the imagination. It is real. Look it up. Back in the day, infidelity was a crime punishable by death. Why'd you think that is?

It's the gynocentric, misandrist mainstream mindset that is speaking out of you.
>Get over yourself, bro. It's only in your head, bro. You are at fault, because you should've somehow seen it, when you might not have had the experience, bro.
It is not your fault, man. You were the victim of a crime and, yes, you are deserving retribution and a costly compensation for it.

I am a little pissed off that people were right that losers stayed losers. I don't care if you want revenge because you found the guy mumbling to himself and slurring was annoying in class, that is just fucking horrible. The guy in class who was a loser should go through his character arc to be a awesome person, not a fucking homeless fuck-up living off his parents and the government. I mean, what the fuck? Reality is just the fucking prediction in Wall-E?

I'm not sure I'm ready to be a dad but she really wants a baby. I'm scared to ask her to get on the pill I think she will resent me, even though she says she will do anything for me.

>>34541968
You know what fuck your careful thinking. Raise a kid in a good world and make sure they turn out to be a great person. Stop doing fucking stupid shit like having gay ass get togethers about a magic the gathering game and removing what could be your kid's room for a fucking collection room.

Just please try to raise a kid. I am getting so tired of everyone avoiding responsibility and the chance to do something great because their ability to let them get away with things allows them too and when confronted they just have a ,no you need to do it, type of bullshit as usual.

>>34541955
Just get a job, minimalism, save and invest. Keep living with your parents to minnmax.

>>34541990
hey if I made more money I'd be more open to it but I don't want to raise them in some situation where I can barely afford to clothe them... We just need to live somewhere cheaper I guess

I DO want kids, I'm just scared :(

>>34540555
With decent photos you're like 80% there. That being said, when I say good photos I mean photos that make you look good, the uglier you are, the more effort you need to put into them. No amount of group pics, pics showing you skydiving or photos with celebrities will save you if you look like Quasimodo

You know what? Even though you struggle with women, at least you don't have a boring high middle class life with girlfriends coming in and out and having the most cuckish marriage possible. At least you aren't some faggot dad who goes into say a Publix and talks about getting how desperate his wife needs her basedmilk and got to make sure she gets her special vegan meat. At least you don't have to damn buy jewelry everyday and waste all your money on a girl, hell lets go even further and say at least you don't have a girlfriend who drops you and steals all your damn food.

You know what at least you never had a scene like this:
"Oh Eugene thank you for the cookies my boyfriend and I would love."
"Super, just for my love and her boyfriend. Uh do you like totes love my flowerly apron."
"Oh Eugene you look fabulous. Now please close the door while my boyfriend gives me the milk to these cookies."

SEE WHAT I MEAN! KEEP BEING YOU AND KNOW IT AIN'T THE END OF THE WORLD.

>on first date walking in public park
>this girl asks me how many days per week I'm alone
>immediately cannot talk (surviving this winter was an achievement in itself)
>start crying
>try to laugh to off
>can't, just keep crying
>she comforts me and the rest of the date went well
That was the first time I cried on a date

>meet girl online - she likes me
>voice call with girl - she likes my voice
>exchange pics - she likes how i look
>asks to meet up with me
>we meet up - she doesnt like me any more
>ghosts me the next day an deletes all her accounts


This also applies to dating apps too. What can I do to fix this apparently gap between women liking me virtually, but in real life suddenly they dont? Do I smell? I shower before any meetup. I wear nice clothes and present myself well.I talk and act the same way as I did on video and audio calls. Something about me turns them off so bad that they do a 180 after the date ends.

Tldr how do i give them “more” during the irl meetup?

>>34541623
NTA but there is no prize for being right.

You can be right all day but unless you are making the rubber meet the road with your epic objective knowledge you're just another dumb redditor who is obsessed with being technically correct. If you've spent long enough here you've probably integrated the memeplexes of anons who post on this board who will usually motte and bailey fallacy all day what they're objectively right about something to vindicate some other shitty out of pocket opinions and decisions that are actively ruining their lives. ie "people are attracted to attractive people! therefor there is no point in me doing anything to improve my appearance because i am not attractive. are you trying to argue that people ARENT attracted to attractive people? uh oh stinky"

I'm rambling but you know what I'm getting at

>>34535487
Fucking ironic that this was the very first answer lmao. Why the fuck is it so hard for a woman to say "im a vain insecure bitch who needs attention", its that fucking easy! If I post a pic with my shirt off and my pubes slightly showing, everyone, their mom, and me would know it's for fucking attention cause why the fuck would I do all that just to enjoy myself?

Either that or women are so far up their own asses that they do actually believe their own celeb status and THINK they're doing it for themselves and anyone else who sees is just blessed.

>it's for getting chad
but how? I am personally disgusted when I see girl in a gym taking photos of her ass and I wouldn't want to be with her because she probably satisfies herself with social media attention and she probably wouldn't care about her bf. Do Chads not mind their potential gf to be whore? or those women want to be only cumdump?

>>34541890
Yes there are people who fuck and sometimes even date the people posting their ass all over social media. Or sometimes the girl just wants attention/money and does not actually want to fuck/date.

>>34540850
>it's for getting chad
>>34541890
>but how? I am personally disgusted when I see girl in a gym taking photos of her ass and I wouldn't want to be with her because she probably satisfies...
You're not Chad, buddy

>>34541831
This fucking nigger loser is right, he's also gay and will never amount to anything in life

>>34541836
I'm not gay or a retard, you fucking faggot. fuck you

I'm pissed at everyone equally. The world fell apart and people need to kind of straighten up or else further generations are fucked. If women are mad at how I am with them they should see how I am with men.

>>34541769
The stupider the louder. Just choose which threads you participate in, and ignore retards. It's an anonymous imageboard, that's normal, and good people aren't chronically online.

Here I read the most stupid shit, and the smartest things.

>>34541823
>Saying something on an anonymous image board has no social repercussions, so people tend to come to places like this to express their most extreme feelings. Sometimes it's trolling, sometimes it's a mood swing or a personal life event that has got them feeling especially angry towards the opposite gender.

This, I just use this shit pit to air out whatever hate I have towards whatever race, gender, demographic, etc is pissing me off that day. Its not like I carry that shit to the outside world because I dont feel like hearing from faggots who think what I say is offensive

>>34538025
You think there's only one guy who doesn't like jews on this whole website?

>>34538038
lol there's more than one of you? lol

>>34537961
They've fucked too many men

>>34538043
>>34538025
Nobody likes dirty jews

>>34540447
Damn

>Have casual sex with multiple women and they ignore him afterwards
Why are you complaining about suffering from success?

>>34541867
I happen to really like these women when I know them. There is pain from them thinking I am no more than some sexpest perv, disregarding these intense feelings that come from the heart/soul, considering them no more than coomer desires. And there is pain of not being with them, of them leaving me.
I am a guy but this probably happens to women (being pumped and dumped, but this is a different thing) more often, they should relate to how I feel.

>>34541857
They're called sluts, OP. Sluts use sex to gain quick attention, and then when they have the attention, they throw it away because they hate (you) for falling for their ploy. Because they wanted attention for their personality/mind/heart/soul & not just their bodies. But sluts are stupid in that they lack complete self-awareness and accountability, so what they do is they market themselves as materialistic, sexualized, and sexually promiscuous for attention and then they act surprised and offended when that's all everyone ever gains from them.

The truth is you are the one who is fucking shallow people. Stop doing that and learn to say "no".

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>>34541941
1st had only given head and been fingered (if she can be believed). I (probably) took her virginity.
2nd had only had penis in vagina sex with 1 other guy (her bf, who she is still with and cheated on with me - not that they have met up in months).
I dont consider the 2nd a slut and didnt consider the first till recently.
I didnt realise it would be like this. I just figured that this is how people have sex. 1st definitely turned on me, maybe she did hate me for 'falling for her ploy'. I hope the 2nd doesnt feel the same way after I eventually start feeling limmerance for her too.

>>34541958
Sluts are notorious liars, both of them most likely got broken in many times before you came along. Think about it logically, the only reason someone gains resentment is from experience. Those two girls routinely experienced being pumped and dumped because that's exactly what they allowed repeatedly, for attention. That's why they resented you for maybe resembling the many men they fucked before fucking you. Those girls weren't as clean as you think. And yes many sluts out there can & do lie about their body count because they know men care about sexual purity and they lie or downplay their past to keep your attention. To a slut, lying about body count isn't a big deal, to them it's like lying about their body weight.

>>34541877
Fuck I need to get a sturdier piano stand to get back to practicing

>>34541877
>Reading but using your cock instead of your index finger
>Foreign languages but especially sign language with your penis
>Playing with your cock
>Cocking
>Woodworking (I need not say more here)
>painting using your cock as a brush
>writing using your cock as a pencil
>gardening using your cock as a watering can
>swimming (naked)
>photography of your cock
>astronomy
>hiking (especially in dark parks where lots of joggers are)
>archery in Robin Hood cosplay without pants
>blacksmithing using your cock has a hammer and her ass as the anvil

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>>34541849
i dont drink alcohol, never gotten drunk in my life

>>34541874
well i get these bouts of self doubt in key moments. when i was in high school i was very skinny and basically the stereotypical teachers pet bespectacled straight A student, played the violon, had acne etc all that stuff. i had a girl basically throwing herself at me, meanwhile i was thinking it must be some elaborate form of bullying because i genuinely thought there was no way someone would like me. Plus everyone in the class teased me about it so i was certain it was bullying.

But i tackled the reasons for feeling inferior head on, i started going to the gym, started visiting a dermatologist etc etc. I gradually fixed everything i didnt like about myself yet the feeling never left. i turn into the same fumbly terrified 14 year old kid whenever i am presented with the notion of flirting with a woman or asking her out.

i noticed i also get extremely uncomfortable when the topic of relationships gets brought up in conversation. i just stay quiet and it feels really uncomfortable, if anyone asks me anything i just say "dont ask me i dont know anything about relationships".

one time a friend of mine wanted me to go on a blind date that would also be a double date with my friend and his girlfriend, the girl i was supposed to go on a date with was his girlfriend's friend.
now since ive never been on a normal date, the notion of me going on a blind date distressed me to the point where i got a panic attack basically and was repeating how there is no way i am going.

are there psychologists specializing in stuff like this or do i go to a regular shrink?

>>34541942
>are there psychologists specializing in stuff like this or do i go to a regular shrink?
if you would really rather be shot than ask a girl out you need cbt/dbt for social anxiety

>>34541942
I don't know because I have never been to therapy and the like. If you are not into alcohol that's fine just drink non alcoholic beverages, gen Z is shying away from drinking overall iirc.

So you still feel like the skinny 14 year old inside? Yeah I get it. The point is is that other people DON'T see you as that. You have changed on the outside, now it's time to change on the inside.

>>34541951
Maybe try what this guy says.

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>>34541893
The webm is from here btw

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>>34541904
>What do you find in it evil and bad?
I'm not OP, but maybe he finds very weird all these stories about "Muhammad" kissing dicks and cross dressing.

>>34541903
>cut all your family off
I mean, it's not a bad advice for OP, just not optimal. He will lose all the relatives he has, his children will grow up without grandparents, aunties and uncles, of course, it's better to not have family at all than to have Muslims as a family, but I think he should try to change their mind when he is not financially dependent on them.

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>>34541693
speaking as someone of afghan descent whose parents are ex-muslims:
you're white, and your parents are white. that means you don't have to worry about getting killed for leaving the religion (unless they really are as fundamentalist as you say they are)

do you depend on them financially? it's time to get on student loans and break those ties. another step you should take is reaching out to those ostracized christian/atheist relatives you mentioned and rekindling a connection. i'm sure they share your views on your immediate family

good luck anon. i love seeing people leave islam. it's an evil, evil religion

>>34541923
the way OP describes it, he seemingly has no choice but to get out from under their control

>>34541903
i gather that OP's already doing this. they're still restricting his life to an insane extent

>>34541904
off the top of my head, the way islam encourages people to kill those who disrespect the religion (especially when "disrespect" is loosely defined and could be applied to someone who's merely a non-muslim) is pretty evil

also muhammad was a pedophile. muslims tend to deny a lot of islam's evils - but not only do they not deny muhammad was married to a small child, they try to justify it

>>34541827
I'm just saying, life is short and the time after 20 feels about as long as the time before 20. in terms of how it feels it's the mid point
The way I see it is this. If in doubt, it's better to rush a little bit too much. It's better to focus on work a little bit too much. Etc. Because even though there is great value in being able to slow down and appreciate life, people ultimately fall into two categories, successful or laid back.
That doesn't mean that you can't "make it" at an old age. But you can't just live life as if there was unlimited time. A lot of people grow old and never have kids. And that, is evolution.

>>34541778
>everyone is just on edge and ready to initially be rud
That's because a lot of people from a very specific place that I won't mention bcs I don't want to be banned from >>>/adv/ have invaded this website. But you can connect the dots.

>>34541875
That's true but I just mean everywhere. I'm real life and on all parts of the internet

>>34541886
>That's true but I just mean everywhere. I'm real life and on all parts of the internet
Well, they also invaded a lot of real places though. Things are worse than they look. Even normies are being very, very, mean "chuds." People are slowly getting radicalized, and it's not like anyone can change that, things are going to where they will.

>>34541858
This is one of the most retarded copes I have read on this site. I get were you're coming from, but nobody at 30 can do jackshit to get the years back. There's nothing to rush, you're starting to think slower, and life is demanding ever more from you. If you rush you burnout and that's fucking death at this point. Not only you will have nothing, you will have a miserable stressed life, no doubt you have that already.

So piss off, and don't try to break the eggs of people who're not complaining. OP's issue was the world is revolving too fast, your issue is you're an old loser, or worse a young guy with a loser mindset making a self-fulfilling prophecy true.

>>34541799
Personally, I am better with Russians, but half of them hate mate (like this one girl from Akhangelsk I tried to befriend... nothing romantic, but I said one wrong thing and she absolutely lost it).

I just cannot bring myself to date actual Asians, even Yakuts or Kazakhs (then again, the one Kazakh I met thought I was weird, since half of my knowledge from Kazakh pop culture is from Old Spice commercials kek and the Yakut I went to school with I never spoke too). Most hate my guts, except for the one guy, he was in HK.

I am not ready either, but I feel that my time could be soon. Maybe, I just need the friend and club situation sorted out, which will be starting next month, then I will be ready. I will have my BS by December and I am pretty much guaranteed to pass, so I am not too worried about that, just worried about what comes afterwards.

By the way, do you have any way that keep in touch with you, after this thread sages?

>>34540876
Modern day Diogenes of Sinope.

Diogenes was the founder of Cynicism; however, I find that Stoicism fits me better.

Read A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy by William Braxton Irvine. He gives good advice on how to be stoic, and chapter 11 specifically deals with how one should address people who insult you. I also higly recommend reading at least PART TWO: STOIC PPSYCHOLOGICAL TECHNIQUES.

>Excerpt From A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy
>“Remember,” says Epictetus, “that what is insulting is not the person who abuses you or hits you, but the judgment about them that they are insulting.” As a result, he says, “another person will not do you harm unless you wish it; you will be harmed at just that time at which you take yourself to be harmed.”7 From this it follows that if we can convince ourselves that a person has done us no harm by insulting us, his insult will carry no sting.”

>>34541843
I will go to the library tomorrow and check out a copy tomorrow. Thank you for the recommendation.

>>34541830
>By the way, do you have any way that keep in touch with you, after this thread sages?
No offense, but I thought you might ask that and decided that I would rather stay anonymous. But I really enjoyed talking to you. Take care.

>>34541932
You too. I figured that you would respond with that. It is all part of practice. ;)

>>34541729
>morning wood
ive never seen him with this except for maybe one time a long time ago
>clothes
i cant afford cute clothes

>>34541719
what if theres no stress?

>>34541740
>ive never seen him with this
Pretty much happens every day.
Sounds like you need to pay more attention to your bf.

>>34541779
i see him every day
i try to initiate sex all the time

>>34541814 Maybe there is something more in the relationship that doesnt work, when you loose libido towards someone it inidicates something isnt right