Bernadette

Yeah, off-topic... Motorbikes back tomorrow.

For some reason I woke up with this song in my head and I've been barking 'Bernadette!' all day. I don't even know anyone called Bernadette. I had to search it out when I got back from the track.

Lead singer, Levi Stubbs is 30-31 in this 1967 performance. Motown was a production line of bands, singing songs written and chosen for the bands, but The Four Tops, four men, make the endless merry-go-round of boy bands served up a pop now look a substantial as post-pubescent holograms.

Watch the short dance break at 1:48. If that isn't the dance of a man so full of confidence, a man used to beating away admiring women (and maybe men) with a shitty stick, I don't know what is. Stubbs had been married for seven years at this point, and would have five children with his wife in their married life.

Stubbs was encouraged to follow other Motown lead singers by taking top billing (like Smokey Robinson and  the Miracles, Diana Ross and the Supremes...), but wouldn't, so the band remained The Four Tops forever. What a man.

If you enjoyed this, then you'll probably like Martha Reeves and the Vandellas on the brand new Mustang production line too. G

Sorry (not sorry)

Off-topic on a Wednesday? You betcha.

When Sideburn goes to a show with a booth the first rule is to entertain ourselves, and the best way is to have a great soundtrack. Luckily we have friends with incredible taste in music that are often happy to come to a launch or a bike show and hang out. Dave Taylor, Katie B, Johnny Alpha and jack of all trades, Dave Skooter Farm all man the decks from time to time.

I know Dave Skooter Farm's show selection records back to front and this one by The Easybeats stuck in my mind after our recent outing to the Revival Show in Rotherham. I always thought The Easybeats were one of the Liverpool explosion, but they are cited as being the 'greatest pop band to hail from Australia' (talk about damning with faint praise...).

The band formed in 1964 and had some great hits, including Friday On My Mind, and were all first generation immigrants. Three of the band were born in the UK, the other two were born in the Netherlands.

Enjoy lead singer Stevie Wright's chimp-like posturing, while not entirely mastering miming, and the chainsaw strum of the twin Gretsches while the studio dancers frug wildly. Yeah! G

The Day Billie Joe MacAllister Jumped Off The Talahatchie Bridge

Last time I was in America this song came on the rental car radio and I haven't been able to get it out of my head since.
Bobbie Gentry was a female Lee Hazlewood. I hope you enjoy this as much as I do. Great soundtrack for a melancholic Autumn day. G

Are Friends Electric

I'm sure I don't have to spoon-feed pop cultural references to you raging aesthetes, but in case anyone didn't get the reference in the headline of the previous post, here you go, Tubeway Army, led by Gary Numan, released 1981.

Anyone know a Gary under 40 years old (except me, of course, 33 on my next birthday.)?

Oh, I thought of one. Isle of Man TT racer, Gary Johnson, 34. Any others? They don't have to be famous. Come on, pregnant women, don't let this completely unregal name die out! Think of all the famous Garys your son or daughter could be following in the footsteps of...

Player
Lineker
Barlow
Oldman
Coleman
Busey
Numan
Moore
Cooper
Indiana
Sprake
Nixon*
Glitter

Ok, maybe not that last one.  G

UPDATE: How could I forget Gary Nixon? A huge signed poster of him sits behind my desk.

Laisse Tomber Les Filles

It's been a heavy week in flat track world, so let the teenage France Gall sing you one of my all-=ime top ten 7in singles, and, hopefully, lighten the mood. This song was written by Serge Gainsbourg and Anglicised and covered by April March, and featured in Quentin Tarantino's otherwise strangely forgettable Deathproof.
The original title translates as Don't chase the girls.
Enjoy. G

Don't You Wish That We Were Dead?

The Damned New Rose post, on the Sideburn blog, prompted a belated response from regular magazine contributor, Dave Bevan (who has been writing about cult motorcycle films for the magazine in recent issues). He pointed me to the trailer for documentary above, that had passed me by.

Even the trailer puts the hairs up on the back of my neck like no blockbuster can. Look out for Captain Sensible, who for a man of my age (mid-40s) first appeared on my radar in 1982 as a human pop sock puppet singing an unlistenable version of Happy Talking from the msucial South Pacific. This killed him in my young and dumb view as worthy of any punk cred, but really proved he didn't give a shit. Criminally, it did stop me from going back and investigating The Damned for decades. Damn you, Raymond (Capt. S's real name).

Anyway, watch this clip. I'm going to hunt down the full length doc to rent or buy as soon as I get the next couple of weeks out of the way.

Thanks to Dave B for the link. He has another feature coming up in Sideburn 26, this time about the film, Werewolves on Wheels. Dave wrote about Psychomania in SB25 and Stone in SB24 and you should check them out. He does the illustrations too. G

UPDATE: Find out more about Don't You Wish You Were Dead? at damneddoc.com

It's Mashed Potato Time

Oh, yea, off-topic Sunday! There are few things I like more than some well mashed potatoes (and there are few thing more disappointing than a dollop of bad mash in a good restaurant), so I was intrigued to find what Dee Dee Sharp had to say on the subject.
Unfortunately, I didn't catch a word of Ms Sharp's lecture, because I was completely mesmerised, hypnotised, perhaps even emulsified by those backing dancers. Enjoy! G

Ohio State University Marching Band

Seriously off-topic Sunday... More motorbikes coming soon.

I've always wondered why American football has such a following with our Trans-Atlantic cousins, but nowhere else. Now I have the answer - the spectators are all hoping a marching band with one-tenth the skill and imagination of the OSU's brigade will be there to create some pre-match magic.

If you can watch this without whispering an oath and finally conceding that, Yes, there must be a God (of whichever domination you are currently leaning towards), because this level of beauty cannot just occur through random cosmic coincidences. This must be the work of a higher power.

From this unblinking eye in the sky camera angle (God's own GoPro?) the OSU MB (as I've taken to calling them) look like how I imagined a flea's circus would look, when I first heard the phrase as a small boy.

Pay special attention to the guy/girl? (it is a guy, I found out later) in the redcoat, who begins in the centre circle. He is the Drum Major and moves in the most cartoonish manner, knowing he needs to put a show on, not just for the VIPs, but also the family from Knockemstiff, Ohio who have tickets for row ZZ, seats 8736 through to 8741 inclusive, and are closer to the rings of Saturn than they are the centre of the pitch.

If, like me, you are mesmerised by the Drum Major you won't rest until you've found out more. Fortunately I've wasted spent time wisely, done some digging and there is a short clip showcasing the talents and focus gone into the OSU MB's various drum major's showmanship. Watch the clip below, paying special attention at 2:29 when he throws his baton two metres to the left and it bounces back to his hand. like magic! I was dumbfounded.

I'm unfamiliar with either American universities or US field sports, so it strikes me as remarkably peculiar to see such a mixture of extremely camp dress and behaviour mixed with chest-beating machismo and military levels of discipline and uniformity. It's like the lid of a 1970s Quality Street tin was sent to join the South Korean military.
Also watch the physics defying back back dip. Enjoy! G

The Mighty Hannibal

I know, I know, it can be so tricky deciding what to wear for the Dirt Quake Ball. Should you rely on the trusty dark denim and American work boots to fit in with the tough lads? Or try to be a little more outré with an alpaca poncho and hand-me-down cheesecloth chemise from your uncle's expedition to Afghanistan and the Hindu Kush, just before the Russians invaded in 1979? Perhaps this is the time to debut the knock-off Ornamental Conifer-style leather jacket with something inspirational painted in One Shot script on the on the back, like, oh I don't know, 'Two Wheels Move The Soul'?

Or what about embracing the moto carnival spirit with something more extravagant? Like the Mighty Hannibal here. The arresting visual cocktail of turban, extreme batwing blouse, capri pants avec kick flare and metallic patent, Cuban heel Chelsea boots are so King's Lynn.

Really, no one gives a monkey's what you wear, just be there. Dirt Quake V is going to be great.

Please note, the jerkin' of dogs is strictly prohibited and if we suspect you of doing it, we'll call the RSPCA.

Thanks to DJ Katy B for sending this link. Hear and see her play a whole trunk of funk on Friday night. G

Brian Auger And The Trinity

DJ Dave Taylor, who will be spinning rare grooves at Dirt Quake this weekend, sent this beauty through to get me even more in the mood for this weekend's party.
There were some incredible Hammond groovers coming out of Britain in the late-60s, but this one, played by Auger, clearly a cross between Marty Feldman and Malcolm Allison takes the cake.
Start practising your choreographed dance moves NOW! G

Dirt Quake V: The Fuzillis

We have a few great bands lined up for Dirt Quake V. Friday night is TV Crime, punk/ power pop from Nottingham. Saturday, in the middle of the track, are Dirt Quake regulars, Dream Themes, supplying the soundtrack to the race action and for Saturday night we have these instr-o-mentals, The Fuzillis!
Plus The Fuzillis will be joined by a very special TV star live on stage.
AND we have the greatest DJs - Dave Taylor, Katy B and Sir Johnny Alpha - spinning delicious 7in vinyl ONLY on both Friday and Saturday night.

Remember, up there for thinking, down there for dancing.

Book a Dirt Quake ticket in advance and be in with a chance to win the Dirt Quake Mutt brand new Mutt Motorcycles custom 125 street tracker (below) G

Matt Helders and his Mule

Drummer with the Arctic Monkeys, collaborator with Iggy Pop, a man with fine taste in motorcycles, Matt Helders is all these things. We flew to Los Angeles to photograph the Brit's mean Mule-built Bonneville. 

Read about the bike, and the man in Sideburn 25. 

And if you like the Not For Aircraft Use T-shirt Matt is wearing you can get your own at the Sideburn shop for just £15 plus post from sideburn.bigcartel.com

Photo: Ben Part

The Damned - New Rose

Just been listening to a BBC Radio 6 documentary on the significance of The Damned's New Rose, credited as the first 'punk' single.

I don't think punk started in 1976, but let's not get into that here, if others want to believe that, then fine. Anyway, this documentary interviewed the four members, describing the music scene, the recording of the single, the influences, the way the drummer, Rat Scabies spurred on the brilliant guitarist, Brian James, to play even harder, even faster. It interviewed fans including Gaye Black of The Adverts, who explained The Damned looked like they were from four different bands, while other bands, like The Clash, looked like they had a meeting before going on stage, to decide the night's outfit.

I had downloaded the podcast, and now I think it's unavailable, but you sleuths might be able to track it down. If not, listen to this perfect 2.5 mins of pop music, devised by Brian James, who was working as a cleaner at the time he wrote it. It's 40 years old and takes some beating. Just like Rat's drums. G

The Beat Goes On

'She's terrific, she's cute, she's talented and she's also my daughter...'
Famous drummer Buddy Rich introduces his 12-year-old offspring to sing a big favourite of mine. I think I originally heard the All Seeing I version of this, but regular Sideburn event DJ Dave Taylor clued me up on this video.
The visual quality is poor, the lyrics are gobbledook, but it's well worth four minutes of your time.

Don't worry, motorbikes tomorrow. G

40

40 years since The Ramones released their first LP. BBC 6 Music just had an hour-long appreciation and played this.

This is from the long-gone BBC TV champion of non-mainstream pop, The Old Grey Whistle Test. I never knew what that name referred to until just now. It's... 'a 'tin pan alley' phrase from years ago. When they got the first pressing of a record they would play it to people they called the old greys [doormen in grey suits]. The ones they could remember and could whistle having heard it just once or twice had passed the old grey whistle test.'

Not sure if this Ramones song could pass the test, but I still love it. It's from the 1984 LP Too Tough To Die. I can't believe I didn't list the Ramones in my top ten favourite live bands a week or so ago. G

The Sid Presley Experience

More garage punk/power R&B, this time from London (I think, but that might be a bit general). I saw these at the Birmingham Powerhouse in 1984, the year this track came out as a B-side to Hup Two Three Four, and it's still one of the best gigs I've been to. The band broke up the following year and vocalist Peter Coyne and bassist brother Chris went on to form The Godfathers, who could also bang out a good tune or two. MP

Jezebel

I was finishing a story late the other night for the next Sideburn (it's never-ending...) and the name Jezebel came up. Great song, I thought, and immediately stopped working and went onto YouTube (I now have the concentration of a butterfly).

The superb rendition above came up, the original of this much covered tune. During the 1950s performance Frankie Laine really emotes and the dancers have curves for days.

I first heard this song played by The Mummies, one of my all-time favourite bands. I've travelled 1000s of miles to see them, in the UK and Europe, and even interviewed them for the long-gone Bizarre magazine. I know people will watch ten seconds of this video and decide they wouldn't walk to the bottom of their garden to watch The Mummies, but musical taste is funny like that.

They were the most memorable live band I've ever seen (If you were wondering, off the top of my head: 1. The Mummies 2. King Khan and The Shrines 3. Rocket From the Crypt 4. Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds 5. Man or Astroman? 6. The Headcoats  7. Jon Spencer Blues Explosion 8. Pussy Galore 9. NOFX 10. The Pogues).

Anyway, hopefully you'll enjoy one or both these clips, or maybe neither. Either way, another post will be along soon and is likely to be about motorcycles or the people who ride them. G

.

Record Store Day

I love records, not quite as much as I used to, but a lot. There aren't many record shops left, so there is an annual celebration. Our favourite record shop is Static Records in Wigan, that featured in the recent Force of the Moto-Ninja.

This surreal video sums up the place. Go out an buy a record, tape or CD tomorrow. I'm going to. G

Davida X The Rolling Stones

The UK's last remaining motorcycle helmet factory has been chosen to create a special edition Jet for the new Rolling Stones 50th anniversary Exhibitionism at the Saatchi Gallery London.

This from Davida...

Using traditional techniques and all by hand, these special helmets are manufactured and painted in the Davida factory in Merseyside, using the Rolling Stones iconic Classic Tongue logo, both in the original red 'Tongue and Lips' design and in the new Exhibitionism colours. 

The Davida Jet helmet is handmade in the UK, with a full leather-lined interior and approved to the highest European standard ECER22-05 for the road and ACU Gold Label for the race-track. All Davida helmets are beautifully painted and finished in their factory in Birkenhead looking over the River Mersey to Liverpool.

The Davida Rolling Stones Jet helmet is available at the Saatchi Gallery in London from April to September 2016 SRP £400 and from Davida dealers around the world, excluding North America, or directly from our website www.davida-helmets.com. 

Very few people could make playing xylophone as menacing as Brian Jones. Looks like his hair was cut around a Davida. Bill Wyman's Vox teardrop is the business, too. G

Alley Club Mod Radio

Is there anything more British than a mod taking his tidy Lambretta for a romantic punt down the River Cam?

This is DJ Revnix, Sideburn reader and Dirt Quake flag marshal on a leisurely day out. He and his mates from the Alley Mod Club have made a radio show of their favourite music to help you through your day at work (if you're lucky, like me and can listen to what you want and you have similar taste in music, which isn't a given).

Blues, ska, mod revival, two-tone, northern soul and even David Bowie (when he was lead singer of mod band, The Lower Third (by the way, is that the worst name for a band ever?))...

Listen to it at Cambridge 105 Alley Club Mods. G