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Showing posts with label felissa rose. Show all posts
Showing posts with label felissa rose. Show all posts

Saturday, August 1, 2026

THE LAST HOUSE -- DVD Review by Porfle





Originally posted on 11/23/15


Described as a "psycho-sexual thriller", THE LAST HOUSE, a.k.a. "Breath of Hate" (2015) wants to be deep and maybe even a little avant-garde--in addition to being violent and perversely sexy--but doesn't quite have the finesse to pull it off.

CLERKS' Jason Mewes (ZOMBIE HAMLET, SILENT BUT DEADLY) is Ned, a lovesick schlub trying to convince his hooker heartthrob Love (Lauren Walsh, MEET THE SPARTANS) to quit the business and be his one-guy gal.  But when Love finally goes to her pimp to serve notice, Sonny (Jack Forcinito, SILENT NIGHT, ZOMBIE NIGHT) strongly insists that she go on one final job with two other hookers to a swanky mansion where a wild sex party is to be held.  Reluctantly, Love agrees.

Bad idea, since we've already seen the three psychotic squatters occupying the mansion do away with a lady realtor (SLEEPAWAY CAMP's Felissa Rose in a brief, thankless cameo), and it's obvious their idea of "party" will prove unpleasant for the three unsuspecting working girls.


There's Cleb (Ricardo Gray), an excitable young black dude whose "crazy happy" mood, we're told, must be seen to be believed; Selma (Monique Parent, THE PERFECT HOUSE), a wickedly dominant sex bomb; and "Hate" (Ezra Buzzington), the oily, enigmatic, and endlessly verbose ringleader of the tawdry trio.  Once this dubious situation gets into full swing, THE LAST HOUSE becomes a round-robin series of sexual trainwrecks. 

Cleb, we discover, likes cheerleaders.  In fact, he thinks they look good enough to eat--literally.  He's also partial to heating up half a canteloupe in the microwave and then making love to it AMERICAN PIE-style, and when these two scenarios are edited together the confusion is compounded when Love suddenly shows up and starts hacking away at him with a butcher knife.  Or does she?

Meanwhile, some of the film's kinkier deeds are performed in the upstairs bedroom when Selma has her way with the other hooker in a mistress-slave scenario that includes spanking, toe-sucking, and other sleazy sex stuff that skirts the boundaries of "softcore" before turning baseball-bat violent and, for me anyway, baffling.


But the most perplexing part comes when we watch our heroine Love in an increasingly troublesome tryst with "Hate", which starts out creepy and just gets worse, until he starts to live up to his name and she finds herself in grave peril. 

Which sounds straightforward enough, but is anything but because this film, remember, wants to be some kind of sleazy art film with its jumbled timelines and rambling monologues. 

Despite his on-the-nose moniker, Hate reminds me mainly of an evil David Spade--not very menacing, even when his true nature starts to bleed through.  The story gets progressively strange as characters die, live again, kill, get killed, etc. and we see a variety of flashbacks, flash-forwards, dreams that foretell the future, alternate outcomes, and other timeline-fiddling. While all this is going on, Ned is busy trying to track down Love by haunting the strip club where she works and going head to head with Sonny.


Jason Mewes handles his role well enough but it's Lauren Walsh as Love who's the real standout here.  Monique Parent is meant to be wickedly sexy, which is something she could do without breaking a sweat.  As Hate, Ezra Buzzington gets an "A" for effort although I never found the character as intriguing or mysterious as intended.  Jack Forcinito is sleaze personified as the pimp Sonny, whose main concern is his miniature pet turtle. 

The DVD from WildEye Releasing is widescreen with Dolby Digital sound.  No subtitles.  Bonus features consist of a writer and director commentary, deleted scenes, a Cinemayhem Film Festival director interview, and the film's London premiere at the Gorezone Film Festival.

While some members of the cast double as prolific porn stars, THE LAST HOUSE is more thriller and less sleaze than the synopsis might lead you to believe. I didn't find it all that thrilling, either, but I must give the filmmakers credit for trying something different. 




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Friday, October 31, 2025

CAESAR AND OTTO'S PARANORMAL HALLOWEEN -- DVD Review by Porfle



 

Originally posted on 11/7/15

 

Petulant, petty, puerile, cowardly yet arrogant, incredibly vain, and prone to violent temper tantrums, struggling would-be actor Caesar Denovio is once again the "Ren" to lovable slob Otto's "Stimpy" in their latest laugh-packed horror comedy, CAESAR AND OTTO'S PARANORMAL HALLOWEEN (2015). 

As the hapless half-brothers, Dave Campfield and Paul Chomicki first hit the screen in a reality TV spoof that was aptly titled CAESAR AND OTTO.  After that, they veered into slasher territory with CAESAR AND OTTO'S SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE and CAESAR AND OTTO'S DEADLY XMAS while paying homage to classic horror in the short films CAESAR AND OTTO IN THE HOUSE OF DRACULA and CAESAR AND OTTO MEET DRACULA'S LAWYER. Here, they're back in action facing more supernatural perils in their most fast-moving mashup of the horror genre yet. 

The story starts off running with a hysterical spoof of HALLOWEEN that SCARY MOVIE wishes it had thought of.  In addition to the ghastly sight of Caesar and Otto dressed in drag so that they can score high-paying babysitter jobs, we also get a jab at Dr. Phil thrown in for good measure.  And this is before the credits have even rolled.


Before long the boys find themselves house-sitting for highly unpopular governor Jerry Grayson (series stalwart Ken MacFarlane, THE MILLENNIUM BUG) in a dream mansion that seems too good to be true.  What the governor fails to mention is that it's haunted.  I mean really, really haunted.

This is just the jumping off point for director and co-writer Campfield to start lampooning every fright flick from THE SHINING to PARANORMAL ACTIVITY to INSIDIOUS to THE AMITYVILLE HORROR.  THE EXORCIST is given its due when the boys' roguish dad Fred (Scott Aguilar) shows up and gets possessed (actually, it turns out he's just extremely drunk) which draws the questionable involvement of priests Sean Whalen (LAID TO REST) and Deron Miller (SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE, DEADLY XMAS). 

As usual, rank silliness is elevated to a sort of rough-hewn art form in this installment of the ongoing series, with sharp editing and a cartoon-like pace giving it the giddy feel of a live-action Looney Tune.  The gags are non-stop with barely a breath between them, and most of them score (if not a guffaw, then at least a knowing titter). 


Production values, while still not quite on the level of a Spielberg film, are the most lavish for an entry in this series.  This is probably Dave Campfield's best work as a filmmaker so far (although his first film, the serious thriller DARK CHAMBER, continues to impress). 

Besides its inventive script, the film's main strength is a cast that many indy filmmakers would die for.  Scream queens Tiffany Shepis (BONNIE AND CLYDE VS. DRACULA), Debbie Rochon (THE THEATER BIZARRE), and Brinke Stevens (JONAH LIVES) are on hand along with SLEEPAWAY CAMP's Felissa Rose and Beverly Randolph of RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD. 

Vernon Wells (THE ROAD WARRIOR's iconic "Wez") shows up as an axe-wielding psycho in a creepy old 8mm film the Denovios discover in a hidden room.  Rising stars JamieLee Ackerman and Josephine Iannece make an impression as the mansion's mysterious cook and gardener.  And as the titular non-heroes, Campfield and Chomicki just might be the greatest comedy duo since Abbott and Costello.


The DVD from WildEye Releasing is in anamorphic widescreen with 2.0 sound.  No subtitles.  A wealth of bonus features include two commentary tracks (one with Campfield, Ackerman, and Iannece, the other featuring Chomicki and other cast and crew), a gag reel, a tribute to the late Robert Z'Dar, trailers, behind the scenes videos and podcasts, and the delightful "Son of Piggyzilla" trilogy of shorts about everyone's favorite giant carnivorous guinea pig. 

Several cool Easter Eggs can also be found on the various menus.  Click on everything!  (I'm even mentioned in one of them!)

All the slapstick gore and goofy thrills you expect from a Caesar and Otto flick, and then some, are lurking in the delirious CAESAR AND OTTO'S PARANORMAL HALLOWEEN.  So check it out, but beware--you just might die laughing. 

Official Trailer


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Monday, December 9, 2024

THE PERFECT HOUSE -- DVD Review by Porfle



 

Originally posted on 7/24/14

 

Betraying hardly a hint of the shocking bloodbath it will eventually become, Wild Eye Releasing's THE PERFECT HOUSE (2012) starts out on a darkly humorous note with an average family having dinner with a burly, grey-haired neighbor with whom they've had an ongoing dispute over a borrowed weed-whacker.

It's a bit misleading, since we're led to think that this darkly tongue-in-cheek attitude will extend throughout the film. It does, in fact, last until about the halfway point, at which all humor suddenly disappears and the whole thing becomes a wallow in gratuitous gore, torture, and perversion in which absolutely nothing is sacred.

The opening segment ends just as the point of ultimate outrage over the errant weed-whacker is reached, but the aftermath (which we won't see until much later) is hinted at during the following story in which a real estate agent tries to unload the now-vacant house on a couple of prospective buyers who can't understand why it's going for such a steal.


If you're like me, then the MILF-a-licious Monique Parent will definitely ring your chimes as the seductive real estate agent who seems more interested in sharing a bed with house-hunters Marisol and Mike than selling them one. She, in fact, is the only interesting thing about this plotless segment which will pretty much go nowhere, especially after it's interrupted by a flashback.

A black-and-white interlude (during which we discover why Monique is hesitant to show the couple the basement) tells of a highly dysfunctional family in which the father dotes on his teenage daughter to an unhealthy degree while his son feels left out. The mother, meanwhile, is an overbearing harpy who berates them all mercilessly night and day.

When the four of them are forced to seek shelter in the basement from an oncoming tornado, the situation suddenly erupts into lots of squishy gore effects replete with dismembered body parts and an overall ambience of splatter. Not really a story per se, more of a vignette in which we wonder who's going to emerge alive from all the hacking and spewing going on in that shadowy darkness, it's kind of interesting. But again--no plot.


Suddenly, we fast-forward into another basement-based situation in which the house's next owner, a serial killing yokel played by Jonathan Tiersten ("Ricky" from SLEEPAWAY CAMP), keeps a woman captive in a chain-link cage while he forces her to be his "audience" and watch him dispatch one victim after another.

Holly Greene is actually pretty funny as the caged woman who must wearily deal with each frantic "newbie" in the adjoining cage and who keeps up with the days of the week by what is done to her ("All I know is I get fed on Wednesdays and raped on Fridays").

It's here, however, that THE PERFECT HOUSE veers into unrelenting torture porn, and, while the sequence ends in fairly satisfying fashion, it serves merely as an appetizer for the all-out bloody horror that is the utterly mortifying climax of the "weed-whacker" story.


Sick, grotesque, and "appalling" in the truest H.G. Lewis sense of the word, this is fifteen or twenty minutes that will test your tolerance for torture-tainment and perhaps cause you to question your own sanity for sitting through it. The closest it comes to having a story can be summarized with the line "A bunch of insanely horrible stuff happens, the end."

As the mother of the luckless family who meet their frightful fate in the basement of horror, co-producer Felissa Rose probably does more screaming here than in all her other movies combined. And for good reason, too. (It's too bad she doesn't share any screen time with SLEEPAWAY CAMP co-star Jonathan Tiersten.) Her husband Jeff--who should've returned that damn weed-whacker--is played by John Philbin of TOMBSTONE and RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD.

I reviewed a barebones screener for this movie and thus cannot comment on extras. The press release states: "The DVD release of The Perfect House (SRP $14.95) will exclusively include over two hours of bonus features: behind the scenes featurettes, cast interviews, footage from the national theatrical tour, special effects featurettes, Q&A footage and an alternate ending."

The level of gruesome carnage found in THE PERFECT HOUSE will be old hat to some (namely, those who have been "desensitized", as they say, to such horrors) and it may indeed suffice for the lack of a plotline. Others, however, are advised to either exercise extreme caution or just skip the whole thing altogether.



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Wednesday, August 12, 2020

Sleepover with Joe Bob Briggs on August 14!




THE LAST DRIVE-IN SUMMER SLEEPOVER

Hosted by Joe Bob Briggs
Friday, August 14


Only on Shudder
9 p.m. Eastern time/6 p.m. Pacific


We've never squeezed this many guests into the trailer park before, and all five of them are icons, from the guy who created the ‘Hatchet’ series to the guy who played Jason to one of the masterminds behind ‘Impractical Jokers’ to two bona fide scream queens. It's a Pop Culture Brain-Exploding Overdose, and they all came ready to dish.

Find us at @therealjoebob, @kinky_horror, https://www.instagram.com/joebobbriggsofficial/ and www.facebook.com/JoeBobBriggs. And join other Drive-In Mutants in the live chat at https://tinyurl.com/JoeBobSlack





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