The Real Housewives of Disney

Starring Lindsay Loham!


Don't call it a comeback......no, seriously. DON'T. The rest of the show was unwatchable. Plus, The Zarinmonster was there. Nuff said.

For The Idiots That Love Chris Brown

A punk is a punk is a punk, and as far as I'm concerned, MC Punk could tap dance on Chris Brown's face and I wouldn't bat an eyelash. As for the stupid young girls that tweet how they would let Chris Clown beat them, you are idiots! BAH! Sometimes I think feminism is dead in America. Young girls need to stop holding fame up like it's the be-all end-all and learn that the you cannot separate a person's character from their actions. He never apologised, he never owned his actions, he never EVER showed contrition of any kind. Plus, he sucks as a musical 'artist.' 


I am not going to put the disturbing photograph of Rhianna on my blog because I think it's not respectful, though I know that statement is ironic in light of rumors that she is still boning the guy. Nevertheless, he beat that girl's face to a pulp. Would you feel bad for him if he was finally on the receiving end?

The Heckler Gets Heckled

I'm going to steal from a fellow blogger and say that this guy deserves an ovation for this! I think that any of you that have worked in the service industry would agree.


Thanks, Leenie!

Lindsay Lohan In Playboy

I don't know, you guys. Not only is it way too literally derivitive, but it's freaking bland. Girl has no soul behind her eyes. I thought I'd never say this but Pam Anderson has more soul, as does any decent drag queen, which she resembles in a boobs-photoshopped-onto-a-Drag Race contestant kind of way.

A couple more after the jump.

What To Do With A Problem Like Trashley?

Mr. McSlore is off at some work seminar training thingymawhatever, so I actually watched The Real Knuckleheads of New Jersey on the day it aired for a change. I never watch it when he's around. NEVER. My husband has a very low threshold for nose jobs and sequins. Go figure.

The Laurita-Holmses held a life coach intervention of sorts for the most ineffectual daughter ever, Trashley. Nothing got resolved, the loser child has no plans other than some vague desire to move to L.A. so she can learn how to apply her own make-up just in case she gets a job modeling empty barrels or burlap flour sacks IF she's lucky in this economy. The girl is just dying for Natural Selection to take her out. Can you imagine how she would make out if Mom and unloved love-buying Step-Daddy Chris put her ass out of their mansion? Where would she sleep, Miss Andy's couch?

Cut the purse strings for good, Jackie. Make like a real parent and JUST DO IT. At this rate you'll be 90 and shelling out for her Depends.

What would YOU do if you were the parent to such a nightmare child? It can't be any worse than what Jackie is doing, Lord knows!

Caption The Housewife, Nurse Cuntass Edition

Holy Plain Jane! Oh, and thanks for ruining the show for me, along with your brownterage of Sidney, Leather and Shill. I don't even want to call them brunettes. It feels like an insult to my russet tressed friends. The word brown just seems more appropriate, don't you think?

Another Preview Of Bravo's Wild Kingdom

And freaking learn to close you param brackets in html, Bravo! I have to fix that shit every time and my time is valuable. Unlike Greggy, I actually DO dole out regular blow jobs, sheesh!

Caption The Housewife, God Hates Us All Edition

That isn't just the title of a Slayer song, it's how I feel looking at this picture of Heidi Montag with Dunyelle. What the fuck, you might be asking? Well, The Daily Fail says that they are shooting a reality show with one of those Bachelor guys. I am more inclined to believe that Spencer is following them around with a Flip camera and editing the footage on his computer, or he made it up so he could make a few bucks off the tabloid pictures. Does anyone care anymore? No? YAY!

The Evolution Of A Nose

When is enough, enough? With some people, never. At least she picked a subtle surgeon but you can most definitely tell that Mallard had it tweaked during the off-season. 
Before-

And after-

Gosh, I thought that all Jesus cared about was your insides. Silly me! She really should have gotten it done before she posed for this ad. Who am I kidding? That's how they paid her!

New Video of Season 4 of RHoNY

Silex. Oh boy. The words 'pink nightmare' come to mind.


Wow. Does everyone hate Alex? Interesting...


April 7th, people. Shit is going DOWN.

It's Friday, Bitches!

If you choose to partake, promise me you won't sound like this.

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Recap: Ritzy Ditzes and the Clowns That Fund Them

Welcome back to yet another edition of fakery and fuckery. How many franchises are there now, 6? Some busted, some played out, and then there's this one. It is on a whole other level. Don't believe me? Let's take a look at the bitches after the jump.