Only now does it occur to me... WATERWORLD (1995)

Only now does it occur to me... that the 1990s were all about taking existing stories and setting them on a boat. 

First, we got UNDER SIEGE. You cannot dispute that it's DIE HARD on a boat. That's the entire elevator pitch.

SPEED 2: CRUISE CONTROL? SPEED on a boat, obviously. Easy.

CAPTAIN RON?... is clearly WHAT ABOUT BOB on a boat. Think about it.

WHITE SQUALL? Eh, DEAD POETS SOCIETY on a boat.

DOWN PERISCOPE? Pretty much KELLY'S HEROES on a boat.

DEEP RISING? Definitely FROM DUSK TILL DAWN on a boat (or SCARECROWS works, too).

CRIMSON TIDE? Sorta FAIL SAFE/DR. STRANGELOVE on a boat. (Yeah, submarine, whatever.)

NAVY SEALS, with Charlie Sheen and Michael Biehn? TOP GUN on a boat. (With fewer volleyball montages and even more propaganda.)

THE HUNT FOR RED OCTOBER? I'm gonna make the argument that it's your classic intelligence game/defector/TINKER, TAILOR, SOLDIER, SPY story, mainly so I can remind you that the rhyme which gives John le Carre's novel its title originally says "sailor" instead of "spy," so why don't you go think about that for a minute as you ponder all these 90s boats (and submarines, too, I guess).

CABIN BOY? This one's a little tougher. There's a little DON QUIXOTE, PEE WEE'S BIG ADVENTURE, and MONTY PYTHON in there. Nevertheless, you must admit that it takes place on a boat.

TITANIC? Could go a lot of ways here, from WUTHERING HEIGHTS to GONE WITH THE WIND to AIRPORT or whatever, but as the highest-grossing movie of the 1990s, there's definitely the sense that it helps define the 90s as a boat-related decade.

Which brings us to WATERWORLD. Which is... MAD MAX: THE ROAD WARRIOR on a boat!

It takes FISHTAR-sized balls to open your summer blockbuster with Kevin Costner drinking his own pee. This is literally the first thing we see, after a Waterworlded version of the Universal logo.

This, and the rest of WATERWORLD, is George Miller-infused, post-apocalyptic madness, chock full of oil and gasoline-seeking weirdos, Terry Gilliam/Karel Zeman flying machines, and costumes made out of trash and (pirate) bondage gear. (Big shoutout to costumer John Bloomfield, who also did CONAN THE BARBARIAN and THE MUMMY '99, among others.)

 

Despite the troubled production and its awful "KEVIN'S GATE" reputation, WATERWORLD, when you get down to it, is actually pretty enjoyable. It's certainly no worse than typical, semi-competent 90s popcorn fare like INDEPENDENCE DAY or TWISTER or SPEED. Speaking of SPEED: Dennis Hopper is in the house, and he's having a blast.

As "The Deacon," the one-eyed barbarian king of "The Smokers," his only character traits are that he's sadistic, insane, and loves smoking. Here he is, tossing handfuls of cigarettes at a parade like they're candy:

He says things like "I swear to Poseidon" and "Excuuuuuuse me!" and even tries to get little children hooked on tobacco with the promise of Sharpie Highlighters.

He gives it just the right amount of "crazy-eye to comedy" ratio, never going full-Busey (Gary Busey––along with Jack Nicholson, Gary Oldman, Samuel L. Jackson, and Laurence Fishburne were also up for the role.)

There's a lot going on here, from a generic James Newton Howard Score to Costner having gills behind his ears and webbed feet, but they manage to make room for Kim Coates playing a weird Irishman rapist with costume elements made from the infamous, fish-choking six-pack rings.

So that's something. Costner even allows a female lead to share the screen with him on occasion, and it's Jeanne Tripplehorn, whose name often appears in the same sentence as the words "deserves better."

She endured literal brushes with death, jellyfish stings, and being stuck on a boat with Kevin Costner. Of the experience, she said “I was feeling a little like Patty Hearst. I was just completely brainwashed by my captors and I was just out there trying to get through it.” Holy shit, WATERWORLD! I guess it's all worth it cause she gets this nice n' corny SUPERMAN/"Can You Read My Mind?" sequence where Costner uses his webbed feet to swim her down to the bottom of the ocean to take a magical look at the ruined remnants of Indianapolis or wherever.

Anyway. MAD MAX on a boat!

Film Review: DROP ZONE (1994, John Badham)

Stars: 3.5 of 5.
Running Time: 101 minutes.
Tag-line: "Something dangerous is in the air."
Notable Cast or Crew: Wesley Snipes (DEMOLITION MAN, BLADE), Gary Busey (SURVIVING THE GAME, LETHAL WEAPON), Yancy Butler (HARD TARGET, THE EX), Michael Jeter (THE FISHER KING, JURASSIC PARK III), Malcolm-Jamal Warner (THE COSBY SHOW, SONS OF ANARCHY), Grace Zabriskie (TWIN PEAKS, WILD AT HEART), Corin Nemec (TV's THE STAND, PARKER LEWIS CAN'T LOSE), Mickey Jones (TOTAL RECALL, EXTREME PREJUDICE), Kimberly Scott (THE ABYSS, BATMAN & ROBIN).  Music by Hans Zimmer (THE ROCK, BROKEN ARROW).  Directed by John Badham (SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER, WARGAMES, THE HARD WAY, SHORT CIRCUIT, BLUE THUNDER).
Best One-liner:  "God bless America!" [said by a lunatic Gary Busey––it's all in the enunciation]

DROP ZONE tells the tale of a risk-taking lawman who infiltrates a gang of sky-diving adrenaline junkies and thieves in order to bring them to justice.  You may recognize this as the plot of 1991's POINT BREAK, also co-starring Gary Busey.  Don't hold that against it.  DROP ZONE is simply a mediocre 90s action movie trying to make it's way in the world, but like so many of its misfit and forgotten brethren, when it hits its stride, it really hits its stride.  Here are a dozen of DROP ZONE's such "stride-hitting" moments.

 #1.  Gary Busey as a Poindexter.

He's the head of a corrupt ex-DEA sky-diving ring who robs government buildings, hijacks planes, and the like.  For this particular criminal maneuvering, he has adopted the costume and persona of a "Poindexter"-style nerd (with undertones of Buddy Holly!), who even draws attention to himself, pre-hijack, by explaining to the flight attendants how he's afraid of flying.  Nicely done, Mr. Busey.

#2.  This particular measure of Busey-related violence leads to the death of Wesley Snipes' in-movie brother, Malcolm-Jamal Warner.

He's around for about five minutes, and has "dead man walking" written all over him; he might as well be the cop who's got two days till retirement.  His death is spectacular––it involves Busey blasting open the side of an airplane, whereupon the air pressure sucks Malcolm-Jamal to the precipice, and despite Wesley Snipes' best efforts to melodramatically cling to his hand, he is sucked into the void while Wesley shouts "NOOOOOOOOO!"  Then the film, having threatened to turn into PASSENGER 57, returns to Earth and...

 #3. Let's talk about Wesley Snipes as "Nessip."  The quest for Malcolm-Jamal-related vengeance leads Mr. Snipes to infiltrate the sky-diving circuit so he can personally hunt down Gary Busey.

Because his role is more of the straight man, square-jawed hero, this leads to an uncharacteristically understated performance.  Don't expect DEMOLITION MAN or NEW JACK CITY levels of flamboyance here––you can tell he's a little frustrated with his role.  Perhaps because of this, the character is named "Nessip," which is an anagram of "Snipes."  Did Wesley request this personally?  Did having his own scrambled name in the mix somehow placate his ego?

#4.  Gary Busey Teeth Domination.  The aforementioned hijacking took place so that Busey could kidnap a hacker (played by talented character actor Michael Jeter) held in federal custody.  To assert dominance, Busey bites off his finger with his ginormous teeth, an event which leads to the following, brilliant exchange:

#5.  Poor man's Linda Hamilton.  You may recognize Yancy Butler and her intense eyebrows from JCVD's HARD TARGET.

Here, she plays Snipes' sidekick, a daredevil with a heart of gold.  She skydives and looks sad a lot.

#6. Hey, look, it's Mickey Jones!  Real-life best friend of Michael Ironside, former drummer for Bob Dylan, and go-to "hick" supporting player,

Mickey Jones plays a member of (fellow Texan) Busey's gang, which only seems natural.

#7.  A rockin' Hans Zimmer soundtrack.  This is from the era when he really went "full-guitar" and accompanied his pounding action with mournful, Ry Cooder-style riffs.  See also: BROKEN ARROW.

#8.  Grace Zabriskie as a two-fisted, Floridian flygirl and parachute jockey.

When you're watching her here, the idea that she is also "Sarah Palmer" from TWIN PEAKS is veritably mind-blowing.  I swear, she can pull off anything she sets her mind to––truly, she's one of the greats.  Plus, we finally get to see her with Wesley Snipes as a scene partner.

And this is the second time they've worked together!  See also: THE WATERDANCE (1992).

#9.  Gary Busey parachuting in zebra-print pajama pants.

I feel confident in stating this is worth the price of admission.

#10.  MIAMI VICE.  About halfway through, when I realized it was not going to deviate from its Florida locale, I began to discover that this is really kind of a big-budget MIAMI VICE episode, but with no Crockett, and with Busey perfectly encapsulating a vivid, "criminal of the week" guest star.

That's fine by me.

#11. Gary Busey Teeth Domination, Volume 2.  Busey challenges Yancey Butler to a tooth domination competition.  

He wins, obviously.

#12.  Busey's death––a.k.a. Gary Busey Teeth Domination, Volume 3.  Technically, I wouldn't call this a spoiler, since in every action movie from the 1980s and 1990s in which he played a villain, Busey dies.  Here, Wesley Snipes flings him out of a skyscraper without a parachute, and he goes to meet his maker in typical Busey fashion, teeth bared.


He swan-dives directly into the windshield of a truck being driven by Mickey Jones, and explodes.

In his final moments, he attempted to tooth dominate Death Itself.  Who are we to say that he did not succeed?

––Sean Gill

Television Review: TALES OF THE CITY (1993, Alastair Reid)

Stars: 5 of 5.
Running Time: 360 minutes.
Notable Cast or Crew: Laura Linney (ABSOLUTE POWER, MYSTIC RIVER, THE TRUMAN SHOW), Olympia Dukakis (MOONSTRUCK, DEATH WISH, SISTERS), Donald Moffat (THE THING, ALAMO BAY), Chloe Webb (SID AND NANCY, GHOSTBUSTERS II, TWINS), Marcus D'Amico (SUPERMAN II, 'Hand Job' in FULL METAL JACKET), Billy Campbell (THE ROCKETEER, Coppola's DRACULA), Thomas Gibson (EYES WIDE SHUT, 'Greg' on DHARMA & GREG), Paul Gross (MEN WITH BROOMS, COLD COMFORT), Barbara Garrick (THE ICE STORM, THE FIRM, DOTTIE GETS SPANKED), Rod Steiger (DUCK YOU SUCKER, John Flynn's THE SERGEANT, IN THE HEAT OF THE NIGHT), Robert Downey Sr., County Joe McDonald (of Country Joe and the Fish), Parker Posey, Paul Bartel, Ian McKellen, Mary Kay Place, Karen Black, Michael Jeter (TRUE CRIME, JURASSIC PARK III), Stanley DeSantis (THE AVIATOR, BOOGIE NIGHTS), Marissa Ribisi, Janeane Garofelo, and many others. Based on the book by Armistead Maupin. Cinematography by Walt Lloyd (KAFKA; SEX, LIES, & VIDEOTAPE; PUMP UP THE VOLUME, TO SLEEP WITH ANGER).
Best one-liner: "Come on, and try not looking like Tricia Nixon reviewing the troops."

"We don't have people like her in Cleveland." –"Too bad for Cleveland!"
Capturing 1970's San Francisco with genuine loving care and paying no heed to the social mores of standard network broadcasting, TALES OF THE CITY arrived on the scene in 1993 to critical praise and a fair amount of controversy (it was funded by Channel 4 and televised in the U.S. on PBS). I've watched it many times over, and I'm unsure if a series has ever quite so wonderfully, wistfully, and mystically captured the experience of moving to a big city and spreading your wings. TALES OF THE CITY is life in transition–

Mary Ann Singleton (Laura Linney) comes all the way from Ohio to emerge from her chrysalis: she becomes an independent young woman of her own construction- adapting and absorbing, but never mimicking, never losing her sense of self (or her housecoat that looks like a mattress cover!):

Note housecoat.

Mona Ramsey (Chloe Webb, in an electrifying performance) has lived in San Francisco long enough to traverse her life with complete confidence and quaalude-tempered charm, but recently she's been thirsting for something more, maybe even that house in Pacific Heights…or perhaps she’d settle for a few dear friends:

Webb and Marcus D'Amico's Michael Tolliver polish off some Chinese takeout.


Edgar Halcyon (the lovably gruff Donald Moffat) finds himself nearing death.

Years of inhibitions have calcified like a disease, and he yearns for one final last (or is it the first?) affair de coeur before he's just a heap of moldering dust.

These characters (and many more- from Thomas Gibson's leering scamp:

to Marcus D'Amico's cheerful Florida boy to Billy Campbell's earnest gynecologist:

to Paul Gross' self-possessed waiter to Barbara Garrick's meandering high society wife in crisis to Stanley De Santis' awkward loner) all find themselves affected, in one way or another, by the epicenter of it all: Miss Anna Madrigal of 28 Barbary Lane (played with tranquil aplomb by the devoted, maternal Olympia Dukakis).

With all of these beings (and even the era itself) in transition, Madrigal becomes their guardian, their friend, and their icon- representing the human ability to break free of one's self-imposed limitations and redefine oneself, to build a community. There’s a spiritual element to it all, with Madrigal’s parable of lost Atlantis and her desire to congregate like-minded individuals, but there’s a profound goofiness as well, from Parker Posey’s Snoopy-obsessed party girl:

to Karen Black as herself (at a fat farm!) to Paul Bartel & Ian McKellen as the height of snobbery:

The height of snobbery and loving it.

to Mary Kay Place’s ludicrous roundtable.


The work explodes with these juxtapositions- profundity and disco; tourist hotspots and dubious holes-in-the-wall; dance competitions and suicide hotlines; epochal, life-changing events and casual conversations struck up at the supermaket; serious, kitchen-sink drama and an atmosphere that occasionally smacks of VERTIGO fused with ALICE IN WONDERLAND – and, as such, it's a true portrait of the city and a tribute to those irresistable souls who inhabit it…

-Sean Gill

Junta Juleil's Summer '10 Movie Series
1. HELL IN THE PACIFIC (1968, John Boorman)
2. KUFFS (1992, Bruce A. Evans)
3. THE OUTFIT (1973, John Flynn)

4. FOR Y'UR HEIGHT ONLY (1981, Eddie Nicart)

5. A*P*E (1976, Paul Leder)

6. BLIND FURY (1989, Philip Noyce)
7. HIS KIND OF WOMAN (1951, John Farrow)
8. HIGH SCHOOL U.S.A. (1983, Rod Amateau)
9. DR. JEKYLL AND MS. HYDE (1995, David Price)
10. MIDNIGHT IN THE GARDEN OF GOOD AND EVIL (1997, Clint Eastwood)
11. 1990: BRONX WARRIORS (1982, Enzo G. Castellari)
12. FALLING DOWN (1993, Joel Schumacher)
13. TOURIST TRAP (1979, David Schmoeller)
14. THE THREE MUSKETEERS (1973, Richard Lester)
15. BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA (1986, John Carpenter)
16. TOP GUN (1986, Tony Scott)
17. 48 HRS. (1982, Walter Hill)
18. ONCE UPON A TIME IN MEXICO (2003, Robert Rodriguez)
19. TALES OF THE CITY (1993, Alastair Reid)
20. ...

Film Review: TRUE CRIME (1999, Clint Eastwood)

Stars: 4 of 5.
Running Time: 127 minutes.
Tag-line: "Clint Eastwood."
Notable Cast or Crew: Clint Eastwood, Isaiah Washington (DEAD PRESIDENTS, OUT OF SIGHT), James Woods, Denis Leary, Michael McKean (CLUE, THIS IS SPINAL TAP), Erik King (DEXTER, STREET SMART), Bernard Hill (THE TWO TOWERS, DROWNING BY NUMBERS), Lisa Gay Hamilton (THE PRACTICE, JACKIE BROWN), Lucy Liu (KILL BILL, PAYBACK), Michael Jeter (TALES OF THE CITY, JURASSIC PARK 3), Diane Venora (HEAT, A.D., THE COTTON CLUB), Sydney Poitier (DEATH PROOF), Marissa Ribisi (ENCINO WOMAN), Anthony Zerbe (COOL HAND LUKE, KISS MEETS THE PHANTOM OF THE PARK).
Best one-liner: "I'll have a Virgin Mary... heavy on the Virgin."

TRUE CRIME kind of gets a bum rap. It didn't have the no-holds-barred pseudo-Fascist gunplay of DIRTY HARRY, the Oscar-bait pull of UNFORGIVEN, or the reflective artistic brilliance of WHITE HUNTER, BLACK HEART. It opened to mixed reviews and geriatric cheap shots, and was something of a bomb, too, earning back only $16 million of its $55 million budget. But I say: so what? I think we can all agree that this is no UNFORGIVEN. But I'm more than willing to settle for a well-acted mystery drama with all-around solid craftsmanship and Clint's 'Zen' touch. So here's ten reasons why TRUE CRIME is better than the conventional critical narrative would have you believe:

#1. James Woods. The consummate skeeze.

Every moment he's on screen, the proceedings feel like a lesser Mamet play. I only include the descriptor 'lesser' because the script was not, in fact, penned by Mamet. Utterances such as "Look, if he comes to me for your ass, I'm going to have to give it to him. Then you'll just be a hole, with no ass around it!" or "Stop fucking Bob's wife. He doesn't like it," may not be Pulitzer-worthy barbs, but, by God, they get the job done. Naturally, Woods brings it his all.

He even gets a 'SAY WHUTTT,' frozen-in-mid-candy-bar-bite moment that will, in all likelihood, blow your mind.


#2. Odd Lynchian touches. Now I've made the unlikely comparison between Eastwood and Lynch in a previous review, and I'm prepared to stand behind it. Here, examples include this mysterious, gradual tracking shot into the shattered, gaping maw of a broken windshield,

and later on, some slow-motion pounding and screaming on a glass barrier that borders on the abstract.

#3. Michael McKean in a serious role, as the prison's resident death row clergyman. It's not necessarily one of his most memorable performances, but it's a nice bit.


#4. Womanizing, philandering, "She looked eighteen to me," 68-year-old Clint.


'Nobody needs to see that,' some might complain. And maybe they're right. Maybe he was just coasting on that BRIDGES OF MADISON COUNTY high, and thought he'd drum up extra female viewers who wanted to see some Clint-cake (?!) on display.


YOWZA

He even tries to work his magic on shop clerk Lucy Liu:



Anyway, this sort of behavior leads to–

#5. This particular tortured look on Clint's face as his pissed-off, long-suffering wife slams the door in his face.


#6. Clint cleaning the pocket-sized J&B bottles out of his back seat before taking his daughter to the zoo.

And speaking of the Zoo:

#7. The Zoo Trip. Now the trip to the Zoo begins with Clint zestfully inquiring to his daughter "ARE YOU READY FOR THE BIG HIPPO?!," which is, without a doubt, the most macabre remark I've ever heard pass through Clint's lips. Regardless, they arrive at the Zoo, whereupon Clint realizes that the clock is ticking, and he must return to his time-sensitive investigation forthwith. Before you can say "Okay, Lets play speed zoo!," Clint is flying his kid down the thoroughfare in a cart traveling faster than a speeding bullet. But then–

Whoa-oa-oa–

WHOOOOOPS

And the horrified onlookers take judgmental note of Clint's subpar parenting skills-



– as Clint tries to salvage his dignity and his daughter's sullied jean-jacket. It's an incredible scene.

#8. Michael Jeter. He plays a sleazebag almost as often as James Woods, and with comparably potent results. Also: I've rarely seen him without a bowtie.


#9. The tremendous pathos of Isaiah Washington and Lisa Gay Hamilton. As the convicted killer (whose guilt Clint wishes to determine) and his wife, respectively, Washington and Hamilton's performances are the fulcrum on which this film pivots.

If you don't care about them, then, ostensibly, you don't care about the movie. Luckily for the movie, they pull it off.

#10. The critical exchange between Clint and Isaiah Washington, during which Clint becomes determined to go on his balls-to-the-wall truth-finding mission. Washington's character has less than twelve hours to an appointment with lethal injection. Eastwood's a larger-than-life, grizzled old hardass. Of course the scene is gonna be good. And Clint gets things off to a great start–


"Mister Beachum... Frankly I don't give a rat's ass about Jesus Christ and I don't care about justice in this world, or the next..."

It's a damned solid scene and a shining example of first-rate Clint, who- as GRAN TORINO continued to prove– refuses to embrace decrepitude and its byproducts. TRUE CRIME is not top-tier Eastwood, but it's a well-made film with some outstanding moments, and it proudly deserves to occupy a slot in Clint's oeuvre. Four stars.

-Sean Gill