Aldis Sure Ain't Gonna Show You His Dick

I didn't even really like the Road House remake in the first place -- although it has shown itself to be fun to re-watch pieces of while doing something else in the time since it was released, and really isn't that how these streaming movies are intended to be consumed? -- but that was never going to keep me from documenting every tidbit of the sequel to the remake since Jake will be coming back. And now, NOW, they have gone and cast sexy-ass Aldis Hodge opposite him. I mean good lord! How much hotness can one small screen hold? I guess we're about to find out. Hopefully Aldis shares Billy Magnusson's predilection for black speedos from the first film? Is that too much to ask? No idea if Aldis will be the villain or maybe he'll be the Sam Elliott type from the original movie -- one of Jake's old UFC buddies who comes to help him kick ass. (In black speedos? Stay tuned.) Anyway I think I forgot to report that Guy Ritchie had to drop out of directing this, and now Ilya Naishuller the guy who made the wild first-person action flick Hardcore Henry from 2015, as well as that Nobody movie with Bob Odenkirk (never saw it), is taking over. And no offense to Mr. Naishuller but this sounds far far less gay than whatever Guy Ritchie would've come up -- sigh!

Good Morning, World

On Friday afternoon I shared with y'all a moment of bulge involving Aldis Hodge on his new series Cross -- well I also had this scene on my person at the time and it took me a lot of wherewithal not to shoot that entire load all at once, believe you me. But I edged us through the entire weekend (I feel as if I should stop this metaphor) and now, Monday morning, kapow. You're welcome. Was it as good for you as it was for me? In all seriousness happy Monday -- I hope everybody managed to make it through their weekends unscathed. But if you needed some alone time to slide down the shower wall like Aldis here, well nobody could blame you. These are "slide down your shower wall" kinda times. 

Today's Fanboy Delusion

 Today I'd rather be...

... interrogated by Aldis Hodge.

That is a scene from Aldis' new series Cross which was 100% not on my radar until this video crossed my social media path (via) and uhh I think I might be watching this show now. 

Aldis Hodge Twelve Times

I was about to write "What an excellent day for photoshoots" but I kept reading that in the voice of The Exorcist demon Pazuzu croaking out "What an excellent day for an exorcism" so... yeah, anyway. My head is littered with pop culture detritus, what's new. (Or possibly I am actually right now possessed by Pazuzu -- also possible!) The point is...

... that this morning I fed you that sexy shoot of Javier Bardem and this afternoon I am feeding you this sexy photoshoot of the exquisite Aldis Hodge -- consider yourselves fed! These photos are via Essence magazine -- there's also a chat with Aldis so if you'd like to read that click here. Or feel free to just stare at him in silent awe with ten more photos after the jump...

Happy InDePlaidPants Day 2023!

This is one of our sillier traditions here at MNPP -- as if anything is done here with a straight face -- but for the past four years now, thanks to an off-hand comment from a reader, I have posted a gallery of actors wearing plaid pants a la this site's name and re-dubbed July 4th "InDePlaidPants Day." Because patriotism is stupid, but hot guys looking sharp is anything but. It's a smaller gallery than usual this year (and weirdly very black-and-white), but no less quality! Hit the jump and enjoy your sartorial independence...

Aldis Hodge Ten Times

You know I had a feeling when I posted those Aldis Hodge photos this morning that we might be getting some more Aldis photos with which to indulge ourselves today, since that big dumb-looking superhero movie he co-stars in alongside The Rock is out -- and sure enough! Esquire mag came through! I haven't read the interview but I have snatched up the photos of Aldis looking fine as ever, and y'all can see them after the jump...

Good Morning, World

Although I was tempted several times by the sheer bulky muscular weight of its casting announcements as they occurred, I now today that it is here have less than zero desire to go to a movie theater this weekend to see DC's new superhero flick Black Adam starring The Rock and Noah Centineo and Pierce Brosnan and Marwan Kenzari and best and most importantly of all Mr. Aldis Hodge, seen photographed here (via). Even with a love of the film's director (Jaume Collet-Serra directed motherfucking Orphan y'all!) I've been burned by DC too many times by now, and the word on this one is mixed enough to put the firm kibosh -- the firm kibosh! -- on that possibility. I'll watch it at home sometime where I can do seven other things and look up whenever the boys are being hot, as the lord intended. But if y'all go see it tell me what you thought, please. Now hit the jump for a few more Aldises (Aldisi?)...

Taron Plays With Packages

I hadn't intended on posting this Taron Egerton photoshoot for Flaunt magazine that's been around for a solid week now because it's all so dour and unsexy, I just didn't feel like encouraging such behavior. We have seen what you look like unclothed at this moment in time, Taron -- this is your moment to do the slutty photoshoots, dude. Anyway I'm breaking my own ban because casting news has broken involving Taron that I actually want to post -- he's signed on to star in the new thriller from Jaume Collet-Serra, director of Orphan and The Shallows and other such goofy thrillers that have had no business being as thrilling as they ended up being but did so via the power of JCS's impressive talent. 

The movie is called Carry On and it will star Taron as a TSA agent "who gets blackmailed by a mysterious traveler to let a dangerous package slip through security and onto a Christmas Day flight." And yes this returns the director to the transportation playgrounds he seems to so adore, given his Liam Neeson duology of The Commuter and Non-Stop. (As a sidenote looking at JCS's IMDb page just now I had no idea he directed Black Adam, the forthcoming DC superhero movie with The Rock and Noah Centineo and Aldis Hodge -- suddenly I find myself wondering if Black Adam might actually be good?) Anyway this movie sounds like it might be something to look forward to, huzzah. Now hit the jump for the remainder of this fairly boring photoshoot if you dare...

HAPPY INDEPLAIDPANTS DAY!

Last year we birthed a new tradition here at MNPP -- it was actually a reader's idea (shout-out to The Futurist!) but I liked it enough that I snatched it up and ran with it. Every year for the 4th of July I shall here henceforth post a gallery of men wearing Plaid Pants, in honor of this website's Dada-esque nonsense title. In case you're unaware -- I've been asked over the years, "What's with the site's name?" And the answer is, "Nonsense." It means nothing. I'd randomly bought a pair of plaid pants the day I started this site, I was trying to figure out something to call the little Blogger blog I was beginning to ramble my thoughts on movies to I assumed an audience of absolutely no one -- I looked down, I saw the pants, a name was born. 

It really was genuinely meant to be Dada-esque, as that's my favorite school of Art -- telling that story ascribes more meaning to it than it actually deserves. I wanted to pick a name that meant absolutely nothing. Now that more than "an audience of absolutely no one" have shown up to read my nonsense though I will admit that I sometimes wish I'd picked something actually Movie-related -- I have ended up on lots of PR lists for fashion emails somehow, as if this site was actually about Plaid Pants, haha. And the site's title, WTF & goofy as it is, makes me doubt many Movie PR people will ever put it on a trailer or movie poster. ("Schindlers List is Devastating," says My New Plaid Pants.) Oh well! It is what it is at this point, 15 full years on, we embrace it. With a gallery of actors wearing Plaid Pants for the American Holiday of July 4th, apparently! Keeping things nonsensical, right on after the jump...

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... elevating my heart-rate with Aldis Hodge.

DC's Black Adam movie is only just filming now, I believe, but it's already been one of the greatest gifts to mankind since the first wrestling singlet was sewn together from eagle's flesh -- as previously stated on many, many occasions this forthcoming superhero flick is somehow managing to cram Dwayne Johnson, Noah Centineo, Marwan Kenzari, and Aldis here all on top of each other in an all-out battle of the bulging fill-in-the-blanks. Biceps, pectoral muscles, my pants. Everything's a'poppin!

We've gotten loads of social media looks at Noah Centineo getting buffed up for his role, but he is the youngest of the cast obviously and social media's more his game, so this here video for Men's Health magazine has been our first and long long awaited look at Aldis doing his own personal Iron Man for our viewing pleasure (save this one admittedly incredible-edible gym selfie) and... it's a welcome add. Is it ever. I made some gifs! They're after the jump...

Aldis Hodge Three Times

Don't know how I missed these here three snaps from Aldis Hodge's photo-shoot for Man About Town magazine popping up at some point after that first batch I posted way back in December, but I did... and now I didn't. Well if you've got to wait for something, something like this is the way to go. 

Anyway I'm using Aldis today (oh how I'd love to use Aldis!) to get down to business (oh how I'd love to get down to business with Aldis!) and alert y'all to the fact that this might be my last post until Tuesday? I've got off-line business to deal with tomorrow that might keep me off-line the entire day, and then I'm taking a few days off to finally go see all my vaccinated family and friends upstate after a far too long pandemic-forced separation. We'll see how tomorrow goes but if you have to stare at Aldis for a few days... you'll be fine.

James Cusati-Moyer Three Times

Interview Magazine shared these stunning photos of Broadway actor James Cusati-Moyer back at the start of February but I didn't post them then because what do I have to say about a Broadway actor? I never got a chance to see Slave Play, I probably will never get that chance. But today came a good reason to go back and grab these snaps for those of us left behind -- Cusati-Moyer has just joined the ridiculously gorgeous cast of DC's Black Adam film, which already stars (deep breath) Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Aldis Hodge, Noah Centineo, and "Hot Jafar" Marwan Kenzari. Oh and something for the Boomers...

... Pierce Brosnan has shown up on the cast-list since the last time I checked! I mean this is just an insanely gorgeous gathering of men. Oh and the "interview" portion of James' Interview Magazine piece was conducted with some lady named Julianne Moore, if you want to read that. I mean she's great and all -- The Hand That Rocks the Cradle forever, lady! -- but it's a shame they didn't have Slave Play producer Jake Gyllenhaal go deep with James. I'd have liked that. Those two, going deep.

Today's Fanboy Delusion

 Today I'd rather be...

... giving Aldis Hodge his post-lift rubdown. (via)

Good Morning, World

I think it's safe to assume that you, like I, have been paying the most minute attention to actor Noah Centineo's gym transformation from a perfectly hot young man into a Superhero Movie Actor over the past few months -- I have been documenting it here on the site in case you missed it! -- but he's really leveled up in the past week or two, presumably since I think DC's Black Adam movie, in which he'll play the Atom Smasher, will start shooting relatively soon. I'll admit I like Noah a little less bulked up, but I can't really blame him, given he'll be standing across from Dwayne Johnson, Aldis Hodge, and Marwan Kenzari in this movie. Hopefully after the movie he'll let the puffery relax! Until then we'll enjoy this, as a phase. Hit the jump for some snaps he shared a few days ago (I am terribly behind)...

Good Morning, World

As mentioned last week Netflix heartthrob Noah Centineo is co-starring in the DC superhero sausage-fest Black Adam opposite Dwayne Johnson, Aldis Hodge, and Marwan Kenzari, which would explain why his Instagram as of late has been nothing but training videos -- if you were gonna stand among all those legendary pectoral muscles you'd hire a trainer too. Anyway all that means -- besides I am breaking out my Shrub Costume so I can go chill on the set of Black Adam -- is that I've fallen behind on curating that gratuitous content, so I've gathered up a few highlights (including the full video of that ridiculous spectacle giffed above) for us this Monday morning; hit the jump for it...

A Marwan You Can't Refuse

At first I wasn't super interested in seeing a DC superhero movie starring Dwayne Johnson, an actor I've grown less enamored with over time ("time" hasn't really been the culprit, more like "every political statement he's ever given"), but Black Adam has filled out its cast with so many MNPP crushes at this point -- not to mention it's being directed by Orphan director Jaume Collet-Serra!!! -- that it's become impossible to ignore. Oh well! First it was Noah Centineo (as Atom Smasher), then it was Aldis Hodge (as Hawkman), and today comes word that Marwan Kenzari (aka Hot Jafar and more importantly one half of the gay couple in The Old Guard) will be playing... well THR says the role is undisclosed, but online sleuths have sleuthed he's playing Sabbac, who looks like a big hot gay devil:

Let's hope they keep that character look -- lover me a bulging devil hunk, and too often they put shirts on shirtless comic book characters who don't need them! When you're shaped like Marwan Kenzari you don't need no damn shirt! (On that note you should definitely click here.) (And also definitely here.)

Do Dump or Marry: Four Miami Men

First things immediately, a happy birthday to One Night in Miami director and queen-since-way-back Regina King today -- I love that her big movie is getting released on her birthday! Yes indeed One Night in Miami is now on Amazon Prime, watch it here -- this is the flick that imagines what a night in 1964 would have been like where Muhammed Ali (Eli Goree), Malcolm X (Kingsley Ben-Adir), Jim Brown (Aldis Hodge), and Sam Cooke (Leslie Odom Jr.), all met up in a Miami hotel-room to drink, chat, and blow our collective heads in the future with such a confluence. 

You can watch the trailer here, although I recommend just watching the damn movie now that you can -- the four guys are great (Ben-Adir is best in show for me, but most people seem to have a different fave) and the movie's got a lot of heart, passion, and thoughtfulness to recommend. It's also got, dare I say, just a lotta goddamned eye candy with these four actors.

Which brings me to the "Do Dump and Marry" portion of the post. We haven't done one of these in awhile and this movie clearly lends itself to the game, even if it does present the question of an Odd Man Out since there are four people and three slots (ha) they can fill. Those slots? "Do" means you spend one night with them. "Dump" means you do nothing with them. And "Marry" means you do everything thereafter with them. I'm going to leave it to your discretions with the extra name -- dump two people, fuck two people, have yourself a Mormon wedding, I don't care.

But here's one thing I do want -- I want two lists of answers. I want you to "Do Dump or Marry" the actors, meaning Goree, Hodge (more here), Ben-Adir, (more here) and Odom Jr. And THEN second I want you to "Do Dump or Marry" the characters, aka the real people, that they are playing. Meaning a second list where you choose between the boxer Ali, the revolutionary X, the singer Cooke, and the footballer Brown. Two lists! Four people! Three slots! Make your hay in the comments of all this!

Aldis Hodge Five Times

Not sure if this is the entire shoot or not since Man About Town magazine really drags out their photo drops on their Instagram over a long period of time -- we've had one of these images for a couple of weeks already and somehow managed to hold it until now! But our patience has broken with this batch -- Aldis Hodge is just looking too good! I can't sit on it any longer! (You can write your own jokes  I just set up in the comments.) Hit the jump for the rest...

Bringing the Miami Heat

Dunno if you've heard the building buzz for beloved actress Regina King's directorial debut One Night in Miami --which imagines the foursome of Malcolm X (Kingsley Ben-Adir), Sam Cooke (Leslie Odom Jr.) footballer Jim Brown (Aldis Hodge), and one Cassius Clay soon-to-be Muhammed Ali (Eli Goree), spending the night in a hotel room together in February of 1964 -- but the movie's getting great notices, even if nobody seemed to have thought what I immediately thought when I heard that plot description.

I’m halfway into One Night in Miami and... I cannot be the only homosexual who sees another version of this movie happening once these four men get in the hotel room and start talking about their “blue balls”

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) November 1, 2020

Anyway that aside (big aside) the film, which I saw a couple of weeks ago, is totally solid, and features star-making turns from Kingsley Ben-Adir (seen up top) and Eli Goree -- that's not to slight the other two! I just already consider Aldis Hodge and Leslie Odom Jr.'s stars good and made already -- am I wrong? But I do think those first two are best in show, especially especially Ben-Adir, who should definitely be in the run for Best Supporting Actor... although I think I read they were running him as Best Actor? I personally think all four should be considered Supporting but what do I know. Anyway, we have a new trailer!

One Night in Miami is supposedly hitting some theaters on Christmas Day, and then struts its stuff onto Amazon for a streaming release on January 15th. So more on it to come down the road. For now let's just take in three more of these shots of Kingsley Ben-Adir after the jump cuz hot damn...

Good Morning, World

You should probably expect to see a lot of Aldis Hodge round these parts for the next little bit now that I've seen Regina King's big-screen directorial debut One Night in Miami, which has Aldis playing the footballer Jim Brown opposite Riverdale actor Eli Goree as Muhammed Ali, Kingsley Ben-Adir as Malcolm X, and Leslie Odom Jr. as Sam Cooke -- the movie imagines a night spent in a hotel room between these four legends and...

I’m halfway into One Night in Miami and... I cannot be the only homosexual who sees another version of this movie happening once these four men get in the hotel room and start talking about their “blue balls”

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) November 1, 2020

... yeah okay I already said that. It was impossible not to go there! But I'll try to be more respectful when I get around to reviewing the movie properly when it comes out at Christmas. You can watch the first trailer here. But respectability's not necessary just yet, thankfully, and I can just ogle Aldis for now! Not that that's anything new -- check our previouslies here. These gifs are from his short-lived TV program City on a Hill -- which also had Jonathan Tucker running around in tighty-whities, so clearly the greatest show of all time. Hit the jump for the rest...