Self and wellbeing

‘Gloom is good’: after my wife died I found solace in poetry and music

This article is more than 6 months old

You can’t fight death, sickness, ageing and life’s various indignities, but you can play very loud rock’n’roll

Ian Whitwham

Sun 4 Feb 2024 12.00 GMT

Every morning my older daughter calls from London. “What you doing today?” Erm… she’s most solicitous. She’s really checking in to check that I’m not checking out – that I haven’t woken up dead or had a stroke or a dizzy spell or plunged down some stairs or otherwise conked out. That I’m still above ground and that the manifold pills I’m compelled to take to prevent extinction, continue to kick in. “So what are you up to today?”

 

Self and wellbeing

I love Springsteen and my daughter is a huge Swiftie – and that’s created a bridge between us

How our mutual love of music – and interest in each other’s tastes – brought my daughter Leila and me closer together

Sarfraz Manzoor

Sun 25 Aug 2024 09.00 BST

It is a cloudy Saturday evening in Edinburgh in early June and I am in a rugby stadium surrounded by young women who are wearing glitter and homemade friendship bracelets. Pink stetsons and shiny bodysuits abound, middle-aged men in TK Maxx less so. This is not my tribe – I am here with my 12-year-old daughter, Laila, to see Taylor Swift in concert. She has been looking forward to this night for months, having seen the Eras tour countless times online. Every night since the tour began, Laila would watch live streams, but nothing could have prepared her for the moment Swift appears on stage and the stadium screams along to Cruel Summer. Laila sings the lyrics with passion and delight. I can tell by her expression that today is the greatest day of her life.